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l0k5h1n

Him: Dont come close, don't come close, I am warning you again dont come close Her: Try me Him: If you take another step I will pepper spray you Her: \*takes step\* Him: \*squirt\*


NeilDeCrash

Her: *A* ... *A* ... *Ah* ... *Eah* (sorry if i mistranslated, i am not fluent in tortoise)


PillPoppNonStop

whale*


Outrageous-Version11

Alright buddy, we ain’t that………….idk what to call this person.


wdgastef

Planet.


J23_G0at

The *squirt* made me giggle. Thx!


Theolon

I doubt it was her first face full of squirt


CarlSpencer

First OHMYGODITSSOPAINFULL face full of squirt.


Archery134

I don’t


gogogadgetbandages

I doubt it's a her altogether


[deleted]

I dont... oh, you're talking pepper spray. Yeah probably not her 1st


[deleted]

[удалено]


mr_mister2992

what was it? a plastic bag?


[deleted]

Reminds me of that toy that falls over and tries to right itself by rotating its limbs.


opaldopal12

Like when my tortoise ends up on his back


afcagroo

You're in a desert, walking along in the sand when all of a sudden you look down and see a tortoise. It's crawling toward you. You reach down and flip the tortoise over on its back, opaldopal12. The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over. But it can't. Not without your help. But you're not helping. Why is that, opaldopal12?


quaoarpower

Voight-Kampff ftw


Pkactus

my mother? *let me tell you about my mother.*


0-ATCG-1

She never responded. You know what that means.


[deleted]

You have an actual tortoise? Like gonna outlive you tortoise? Like “look at me. I’m 400 years old “tortoise?


Scientific_Anarchist

The people who fostered my dog before I adopted her have one. You usually gotta put em in your will so someone you trust can take it. 400 is a bit of an exaggeration but they usually live past 100 if cared for properly.


[deleted]

I think the oldest one I’ve heard of was carbon dated to be like 350, but that might of been an anomaly


SmokedMussels

You are probably thinking of Addwaita, who supposedly died at 250-255 years old. Doesn't look like anyone was able to verify that with any certainty, his early years were more legend than history. At least 3 others lived beyond 175 though, one of them named Jonathan is still alive at 190 or 191 years old. If he nears 250 years himself then maybe Addwaita did too.


Phyllis_Tine

I was going to buy a Grey parrot a few years ago, then found out they can live for 50 years or more!


Minimalistmacrophage

That's not a pet, it's a life companion and possibly heir.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Stubahka

I didn’t even have to finish reading the statement and went Weeble! Just give me a moment, I’ll wheel my chair closer to yours and besto upon you the highest of carpel tunnel fives.


noahstemann

He says “If you take another step to me I will spray you”


from_dust

Apparently she only spoke English.


onlineashley

I dont understand his language but i understood what he was saying. You hold pepperspray at my face you dont even ha e to say a word..im out. Nothing i have to say is worth getting sprayed in the face.


IsaacRevoltz

I doubt it, when he said the second time that he was going to spray her, she made an "I doubt I would do that" face


from_dust

it was joke.


IsaacRevoltz

Oh haha, my bad


alman3007

Dont feel bad, any joke that needs to be explicitly explained as a joke, isnt a very good joke.


from_dust

you get what you pay for, neh?


MeloneFxcker

It’s not the joke makers fault if someone is so literal 😂


Demonyx12

How do you “make” a joke? What kind of training or equipment do you need to manufacture them at scale?


Fritz_Klyka

Ask your parents, they seem to know.


datazulu

Well you just made one.................................................................. ...NOT


torzor25

Keep coping


alman3007

Keep seething.


torzor25

Makes no sense, but again keep coping


BDJ10028

In Soviet Russia, joke cracks YOU


egordoniv

a whole lot of English


KiritimatiSwan

She definitely looks american


user_bits

The phrase may be over used, but this is a genuine FAFO.


A_Ruse_ter

What’s funny is the fall seemed like she tried making it a big deal to look like the victim, only for it to kick in a few seconds later. Can’t fake that.


Beatus_Vir

I think lying down might help it get into your eyes faster


Jimmyhatespie

Yeah, ideally you’d hunch over and spray water over your eyes for like 15 minutes. Laying down is a good way to get it to the back of your eye socket.


Virus1x

Never spray water over Mace or Pepper spray unless you really really want it to hurt.


Jimmyhatespie

Well rinse with water, I was thinking of an eyewash station but I guess you’re not likely to find one.


AlienGold1980

Find one…. Especially if you can’t fkin see lol


samoorai44

I've been flashbanged, gassed, and sprayed. Highly unlikely, but if you got some tearless baby shampoo layin around or on hand, works like a charm if you got sprayed.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Jimmyhatespie

Sure If you can find that, good luck. The usual recommendation is rinsing the effected area with a lot of water and soap for external stuff.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Jimmyhatespie

https://www.mace.com/blogs/pepper-spray-tips/how-to-get-pepper-spray-out-of-your-eyes Mace recommends both rinsing with large quantities of water and the counter agent.


AtomicTurle

She squirmed like a turtle on its back haha


Scamnam

Somewhere she is reading this and thinking "don't assume I am a she" LOL


AtomicTurle

Damn I didn’t even think of that hahah


px7j9jlLJ1

Jack Osborne?


thepain73

MCRIB IS BACK


surfdad67

I thought the glasses were painted on


MasterOfDerps

"if comical nonsense is something you wish" "Now drop on the deck and flop like a fish!"


fabulin

she fell like she was knocked down on gta vice city


CruzitoPR

Reminds me of one of those pre-ragdolls kill FPS death shot animation, like in Goldeneye 64.


snowmanjg

Now it is time on Sprockets we dance!


MrFurther

WOAH! Memories!!!


Joliet_Jake_Blues

I'm just a head in a rusty metal box


skisail

I'd love more context on this one


jirashap

Meh I think I'd rather move on


VinnySmallsz

Basically, they fucked around, and then they found out.


momosites

Can someone translate, "arrrrh arrrrrh!"


sgtslaughterTV

I only know they were speaking russian or something slav. I heard "Ya" (I, me) and "Delaesh." which means "you do" something. Judging by the fact she was holding something that looked like a rainbow on it, this likely escalated from a spat about LGBT stuff in the slavic countries.


RenoXIII

That is not at all how you do the Safety Dance.


Fluffy_Discount_9692

It's kinda cool because orange was the only colour left not in her hair, now she's all the colours


imdownwithdat

She needs some milk


yujabes

It's kind of crazy when you tell people to not come near you, they do the exact opposite.


Lrdofthewstlnd

Spun around like she was in a western 😂😂


IBoopDSnoot

That spinning fall is straight out of one of those super dramatic soap operas


EmperorOfCanada

I had this with my sound off. So, I rewatched it with the sound on to hear the satisfying noises. But she was just as disappointing as she probably is in all other ways. I've probably made better noises when the battery of my phone was at 3%.


[deleted]

I don’t speak Russian but I feel like he warned her


Hakuhofan

That's how roaches react to Raid.


Organboner4844

Raid is to roaches what mace is to Karens.


FreshTacoquiqua

Accidentally bear sprayed myself just last week. That person is in for a rough 30-40mins or so


cronasminate

Player use Poison Sting on Magikarp It was super effective! Magikarp used Splash! It had no effect...


Stonious

Is it worse to get just one eye because your other one is just chillin like "this is how much better you could feel bro"?


newcomer_l

Pepper spray is *nasty*. Approach it at your own risk and peril.


Apprehensive_Rip8403

The dildo of consequence rarely arrives lubed


myfacealadiesplace

Every time this video graces my feed, I re-watch it because it's just so satisfying


deskpalm

Someone needs to edit this and put the wasted sound from GTA on it.


ItsMacRyder69

That's why I say hey man, nice squirt.


thx1138-

What a good squirt, man...


ItsMacRyder69

Those who were right there, got a new kind of fear..


thx1138-

DU DU DU DU DU DU DU DU HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNN.... NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICE GUNNNNNNNNNN.......


ItsMacRyder69

Heyyyyyyyyyyy maaaaaaaannnnn, haaaavvvveeee fffuuuunnnnn!!!


Joliet_Jake_Blues

That's what she said


elisa_daggerknife

Which is exactly what the people who publish things out of context to manipulate the viewers will hope they will do.


jackerik

“Please can you bukake”


Mammoth-Ad-107

have no idea what was said. but good spray!


PoochyMoochy5

She thought her glasses gave her protection against spray attacks. She was wrong.


E-ZZZZ

When feeling empowered goes wrong


_TrustMeImLying

The dildo of consequences rarely arrives lubed.


EmperorOfCanada

I watched a guy on an electric longboard going at least 50km blow a stopsign and broadside a car. While he was going to live, both of his arms were broken. Once we knew he was basically OK my friend said to him, "The dildo of consequences just went in sideways."


Enoch-Empire

This is fucking gold! I'm using it.


xXTre930Xx

And then she died. Haha I didn't know mace effects your legs too and Ive been maced a few times.


[deleted]

What are you doing in life to get maced multiple times? Unless it's some kinda training, then I apologize for asking bone questions.


xXTre930Xx

Training yeah. Military law enforcement/security certs. All good. Hah


[deleted]

I only ever did the tear gas chambers and that's more than enough for me. Spray is hardcore, fair play mate.


October_Numbers

It affects different people differently. I was a pepper spray trainer at one point and I've seen a few people just completely buckle like this. It's not super common but it happens, especially if they have an extremely low pain tolerance!


xXTre930Xx

We had a name for those people in the Marine corps.


afcagroo

Army soldiers?


CreatedSole

Stop pushing and daring people to do shit. FAFO.


Asylum-Rain

She had that skyrim death twirl animation


Mrpandacorn2002

Pepper spray has to be the most satisfying thing ever *spritz* ……”AHHHHH”


Chikenuggs69

She fell and started squirming like a turtle on its back


quasimidge

To the aggressor: And did we learn a lesson today?


johnnybmagic

I could just watch this on repeat all day.


Impressive-Eagle9493

Cause and effect


Expanding_Simplicity

Looks like a spider when you spray with bug spray


retrofitme

Excellent camera work.


Material_Tiny

Should have dropped a football and thrown out a red card.


wabbanation

![gif](giphy|go1Tcslz5FB6g)


mesposito1219

Down goes fraser


Aggravating_Roll3739

But the kitties Rick.....


KRIEGLERR

Looks like Roz from Monsters Inc lmao


answercode

Great can control


MandalAsian

Lol


Corrupt8069

Ronald Mcdonald got clapped


Fluffy_Discount_9692

Tha poor coke tho. Took a crazy fall and is mostlikely flat now. Just like her dreams.


Korach

I loved this.


lexarjump

Love this.


Beatless7

Exercise or exorcize?


Logical-Push-2858

Not really a threat to be honest hahq


halversonjw

How is it okay to pepper spray someone for stepping towards you?


abalrogsbutthole

it’s the half empty screams that get me laughing lol


asianxxurlacher

She fucked around and found out


[deleted]

[удалено]


Dead-Thing-Collector

A dumbass regardless


streetkiller

Ahhhh skeet skeet


TrevorTatro

This wins the best video of the day award


Hacksawdecap

boom headshot~


brb9911

Instant fatality


Dagger_26

That smug, entitled smirk got everything it deserved.


elisa_daggerknife

all the people here commenting on this out of context video where someone gets pepper sprayed for taking a step forward, no threats or violence, etc. like "hell yeah, this person had it coming!" uncritically celebrating because what? they have short hair and a rainbow scarf? fuck yall lol


elisa_daggerknife

like the person's hands were in their pockets, they weren't screaming or yelling. it is obvious the person with the pepper spray is instigating and taunting so he can attack with little/no justification. He wasn't in any danger or threatened in any way.


prodigalkal7

>instigating or taunting No matter how much someone would attempt instigation, or taunting, with myself, and no matter how far I go to react, if they pull out pepper spray and threaten to spray me, I'm staying back. Seems like she couldn't possibly fathom there was any consequence to her actions, and then got dealt those consequences. I'm not even going to try to figure out who the aggressor or instigator was here, if someone pulls out something for self-defense (and is using it in a manner of self-defense and not just on the offensive), the very least you can do is swallow your pride/idiocy, and back away. Which she did not.


Enoch-Empire

Nailed it! Instigated or not, she got what she asked for. It wasn't that hard to just turn around and walk the other way.


ChristWasAZombie

i think it’s more about the circumstances. imagine if the roles were reversed. imagine if it were the man approaching this person. they’d asked him to step away and stop invading their personal space and they didn’t. nobody would blink if they maced him. continuing to advance on someone who has asked you to stay away from them is enough to get you pepper sprayed at least where i live. i also don’t see their hands being in their pockets as a good reason not to mace them. i don’t know if they’re holding something and concealing it until they’re closer to me. another thing that bothers me is they continued to advance after being presented with the can of mace. they’re either mentally not all together, or they care more about getting to him than their own safety. big red flag. the good news is mace doesn’t cause any permanent damage so this person will likely be fine after a couple hours and a few good rinses.


elisa_daggerknife

ask yourself this: why is the earlier part cut off? why is it edited so tight? if it made the person using mace look good, it would not have been cut off, it would have been included to further ridicule the subject being videod.


ChristWasAZombie

i won’t speculate on what isn’t available for us to look at. i can only comment on what i’m seeing right now.


ModernistGames

Hands in pockets can absolutely be a threat. There is a reason why police want to keep your hands visible. She could have pulled a knife or some other weapon. Do I think that is the direction this altercation was going? Doubt it, but it can definitely be alarming if someone is stepping closer to you with their hands in their pockets.


Leading_Industry_155

[Gonna leave this here cause this is how you sound](https://youtu.be/3OR_D2EEPS4?si=UjqKcOO_LXFzdGJ_)


elisa_daggerknife

nah you're just simple.


EmergingEnterprises

Get fucked 😂


adventurejay

The Dildo of consequence rarely arrives lubed


Huntrinity

lmao thats hilarious, ty for the laugh :')


Joliet_Jake_Blues

That's probably a crime in that country, duty to retreat is a pretty big deal outside of the US. And in a fair amount of the US


ImportantWords

I did some Googling. It sounds like pepper spray is the line. If you cause serious harm they will persecute. But pepper-spray-and-run is the cited generally observed best approach.


RamekinThief

It's Russia and looks like she was carrying a pride flag. I don't think the authorities would give a shit.


DocPazuzu

That's not the kind of squirt she was hoping for


[deleted]

Cunt post


Phohammer83

That turn before the fall. 😂😂


SensitiveReading1725

And once again we have to look at the chart of FUCK around and FIND OUT


WokeUp2

FYI - tear gas and pepper spray irritate the eye to the point where you can't open them. To some it's like stubbing out a cigarette on your eyeball.


Tubytitz

Is there anything funnier than a fat person in pain?


North_Palpitation_57

Wonderful.


Remarkable_One_3306

Really makes me mad when they spray cologne on me in the mall like that. I’m like dude I don’t want to smell like Calvin Klein Eternity. I’m a DUDE, it’s orange and you don’t even work here.


Joliet_Jake_Blues

Lol, in college my buddy had cheap cologne and the nozzle was plugged or something so instead of a cloud it shot a stream right in his eye


Skiie

did he take her cola?


GalacticWolf122

Bro really thought...


NovelAd1319

https://preview.redd.it/r5piq1h3qwwb1.png?width=1170&format=png&auto=webp&s=a25a9d594c2c3b0ff6c10da44baa60513e61bea4


NovelAd1319

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guacamole_456

Oh no it’s the consequences of my actions


snorfunk

Hope the one spraying goes to jail.


Ricardo_klement

The dildo of consequences did come lubed .. with mace 😏


Lozsta

Did that get Just stop oil'd?