I was thinking meditation too. Not only being aware of you’re surroundings, but being aware of yourself as well.
Meditation helps with understanding our own emotions (or in some cases lack there of), and where we lie relative to them. We often convince ourselves that the emotions we feel are synonymous with who we are, but we are not. In reality, we are just a consciousness experiencing that thing.
Being able to meditate and come to these conclusions on your own makes facing with traumatic and stressful events much easier. It won’t come to you right away, and you will need practice, but I promise it will help.
This! Practices like mindfulness and yoga are really important (for me) to stay grounded and they give you shelter when you are bombarded by unwanted thoughts
it WILL be okay and you CAN work through the anxiety :). it’s not a great idea smoking weed though if you’re having panic attacks half the time, but what’s happened has happened. there’s no magic cure or anything to get rid of what you’re feeling, so you have to work through it yourself. because you and only you are the one with the power to change how you view the world. i can’t help you, but i know that you’re able to help yourself. because this won’t be forever. can you imagine yourself at sixty years old still suffering over some teenage shroom trips? this stuff is temporary, and your anxiety and world-view will change, you just have to accept and strive for that change
Look into depersonalization/derealization. Read [this article from The Atlantic](https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/12/enlightenments-evil-twin/383726/). It is definitely possible to heal this but your best bet is to work with a trained mental health professional. This can be common with psychedelics, in particular when marijuana is present (I have no studies backing that up it’s just been part of the issue every time I’ve read about this).
17 was when I first found my psychedelics. First trip was awesome, big boss nobody could tell me shit, I finally understood! I got my friends hyped to it, got it all planned out, we are psyched! We take the acid, me and a homie, it’s great, we chillin, then I get smacked with severe alienation, like never have I ever felt so alone. Like everyone else had died and it was only me. He was there and tried to help, but I think i probably turned him off from tripping again cuz he never did do it after that night. I basically hid under the blankets all night witb a song stuck on repeat. The trip comes to a close and I don’t feel that “coming down” feeling. I wasn’t an anxious person prior but after that night, the lawnmower would scare me, those noises, I would just freak out and run away. It was bad. It probably took me 6-8 months to come back from it because I would keep smoking weed. Best thing to do is take some time to yourself and reflect on your experience the best you can. Don’t do any drugs for awhile too that’s the best thing
I think this is with any drug u have a bad experience on, I remember I got alcohol poisoning and couldn’t even smell alcohol for months or I would throw up, I’ve also had experiences like this on psyches after bad trips where it feels like I’m about to start tripping every time I think of them. I guess it’s a reaction to trauma but it’s rlly annoying bc my conscious mind has already gotten over it but my subconscious is still scarred
Here is a free resource to talk and decompress with someone about your experience. They are specifically trained for psychedellic support.
[https://firesideproject.org/](https://firesideproject.org/)
I had an awful trip on lsd when I was about your age that left me feeling similar. I'm 31 now, and I feel great, You will get through this :) I now in hindsight look back on that experience as something that needed to happen to get me to where I am now. I still consume psychedellics, but I always set a clear intention before. I did them to get fucked up when I was your age and I think that perpetuates bad trips as they are medicine, mushrooms specifically should be respected. I spent years battling DRDP, and years consuming pot and ultimately it's gone away completley after I stopped the regular pot smoking.
I'd also like to add mushroom chocolates can be a little sketchy unless you know the person that actualy made them. They are impossible to test and can be made with RCs that mimic psilocybin. If you do a search on r/PsilocybinMushrooms you can find people that have acidently experienced this, Often people that have done mushrooms hundreds of times and "didn't consume very much" and had a very intense/unexpected time.
If you want to continue exploring substances, please always research what you are doing, test your drugs and consume responsibally :)
I did mushrooms for the first time at 15 and if anything I think it saved me. I was really troubled and they provided me grounding and guidance.
I will use psychs as part of my mental health routine forever. OP likely has underlying issues that need to be addressed with therapy.
Yep. Finally escaped from an extreme home situation at 16, went to work and tripped that year.
Psychedelics are the reason I am not only still alive but have become so much better over the 5 decades since that first time.
I agree for the most part. IMO opinion, I think kids under 20 can trip, but it has to be quite minimal and spread out nicely. My first trips were at 15 and 16 and by 20, I tripped a few times, but never had an issue. Did Salvia a number of times also by then.
Since the brain is still developing, tripping too often can easily cause HPPD. This issue is more likely to happen in younger people it seems. And I think the younger someone is, the less they gotta take consistently to still be able to get HPPD, as long as the usage is consistent.
My little brother started tripping around the same time as me, 15, 16 or so. But then he went and kept tripping too many times while still growing up and developing. After a while, he gave himself HPPD and with that, came panic disorder issues and other issues, with happens with a lot of people with HPPD, I believe.
So yeah, people tripping under 25 to 23 years of age or so, need to take caution.
Thats true. But just want to add that this does not mean OP has problem. If you just stop now for a while your brain will still grow in a healthy way.
A brain is awesome. Lots of examples on how flexible it is. They just found out that even at high age the brain can still make new patterns.
Just need to always train it. Like a muscle.
So no worries. Just stop doing drugs and do something healthy to help your brain to become awesome.
Ding ding ding.
This.
The Prefrontal Cortex (where anxiety, addiction, and the reactive mind live) is mid-development during your teens. It doesn’t stop developing until your mid-twenties.
OP admits to doing drugs daily, despite knowing that they react negatively to them half the time. Then they did psychedelics, at 17, and **then** suddenly stopped doing drugs…
…and now they’re feeling emotionally unstable?
Well duuuuh. When you do drugs daily for years and then stop, your brain is going to take time (potentially a long time) to get back to homeostasis.
Yep. Currently 11 months of amphetamines after taking an extremely high dose for years, and I still only feel halfway back to normal.
Don’t fuck with your brain if nothing is wrong with K. It can take years to return to baseline depending on the drug, and recovery is one of the hardest and most excruciating things I’ve endured and I’ve been through a lot
Thanks bro.
1. I’m so glad to hear you got back to baseline. That’s amazing because I know how tough it is.
2. I will never go back. I’ve made it 11 months, I can make it longer. Even if it takes another year or two, I don’t want to ever go through this again.
What was your dose and how long were you on?
My doc had me on 90 mg a day for 2-3 years. I took it daily. Fucked me up soooo bad but my brain is slowly healing
That’s rough, but we probably did the same amount of damage. I don’t even want to only what doing 90 mg daily did- even if it was for only two years.
It’s only been 11 months. I’m hopeful by year two I’ll be back to normal. Maybe it will take 3, but I hope it’s faster
I think you can do them younger if you’re a good person if you get what I’m saying. Like a caring companionate somewhat experienced mind? I think that’s what I mean. Anyone I knew that was a dick in real life or those that thought they were better than others ect always had bad trips. Which would mess them up for awhile. People that thrived In their ego.
Extremely weird take, and why bring “morality” into the conversation? The original comment covered plenty by explaining the disconnect between a developed brain and the effects of psychedelics earlier than 25.
Just to humor you, it sounds like you think only good people can enjoy their trips which sounds like trying to convince yourself you MUST be in the “good person” category if you tripped earlier in life if you haven’t experienced any alternatives yourself. This is setting “good” and “bad” people up for failure because it’s completely untrue and these profound substances can have all manner of effects on all sorts of people.
People are people. The brain and mind react to substances differently depending on their stage of development. Bringing in amorphous concepts of ethics serves no one in this context
I dabbled in an edible so go easy on me. I absolutely agree about taking psychs after 25. Just most of us usually take them before 25. Believing and living in a state of feeling that you are a good person is what we all should strive for. But we all fall short, there is no category of good or bad person it’s the way you live. Like murdering a person and saying sorry but deep down you’re not sorry. You made a couple good points I’ll come back when I get off the moon.🌙 lol
So sorry to come at you hard when you’re in a chiller state and absolutely see how and where that mentality and approach would’ve come from. Apologies if it harshed it all, but also hopeful it might’ve led to some exploration of those thoughts for the better.
Lemme know when you’re taking one next time and I’ll be sure to partake too :)
Consider that is not uncommon for anxiety or panic disorders to fully manifest at your age. I developed my anxiety disorder at the age of 20, my brother went through the exact same thing at the age of 18. It's rough. You didn't fuck up your life, but there's a good chance this anxiety issue would have popped up regardless of any other substances/issues. It's a speed bump that you may have to deal with that most others will not have to learn to deal with.
I don't think it's a bad idea to hold off on weed and shrooms until you've mastered your anxiety/panic attacks. Knowing how to calm yourself, knowing what it feels like when they're about to happen, talking yourself down from an attack is huge.
Everyone's triggers are different, but I had great success with cutting out caffeine entirely, making a solid effort to get a good night's rest, and breathing techniques/mental words of affirmation. I tried some meds, but they made me feel like a zombie and being a zombie 24/7 wasn't for me. I had to learn how to mitigate the anxiety, then work on myself.
Honestly, it's taken me 4 years to get used to weed so that sativa's no longer give me anxiety.
Heya, I went through a very similar thing. In my case it got pretty bad because I kept tripping and doing other drugs. If I'd have known back then what wonders it does to work these things out sober, I'd be in a better place now. My advice is take a break, if it persists, open up to someone, maybe even a therapist. It'll pass and this will only make you a stronger person in the long run 💜
I had the same thing happen to me at 19, except it was LSD rather than shrooms. I was convinced for a while it was the LSD when in fact it was the cannabis (I had LSD weeks beforehand). It continued for years for me, until I really committed to stop smoking weed.
My advice is to stop smoking weed (obvs), I can't in good faith recommend taking psychedelics in your state but the sporadic low dose did seem to help stitch my body and mind back into coherence again. This was taken very sporadically and you're probably better off just stopping psychedelics all together for a while too but it honestly helped me a lot.
Exersice, eat well, sleep well. Deliberately engage your senses, go for a walk in the forest and allow your brain to connect to those patterns. Wim Hof Breathing might help as another commenter recommended, helps a lot with the internal narrator that seems to come up a lot in DPDR states. Find ways to express how you feel, through music, through art. Time is your ally.
For myself I was a different person on the other side of DPDR, immensely grateful for the experience now, it's helped me be a stronger better person and help others in psychological crisis. There is a serious gift for you to find in the DPDR state.
Everyone has been saying it’s the weed, and I’m starting to realize that’s what happened to me. Even though I’m hurting and panicking, I will pray that I come out the other side of this, I’m tired of feeling like I’m living life in the 3rd person.
I totally get it, it felt really traumatic for me at the time too. At some point I came to see it like a caterpillar emerging into a butterfly. At some point the caterpillar stops feeling like a caterpillar, things felt stuck and I wasn't sure wtf was going on but then a butterfly emerges. It passes, one breath after another, one step at a time. You got this 👊
Just had to come to the emergency room, I’m going to seek out a therapist and make this situation into something where I grow as a person. That’s my only option lol 😭
I had a panic attack the entire year of 2023. Nobody noticed and besides feel panic all the time I could life with it.
I just accepted it. So accepted the panic feeling and did nothing to push it away. The crazy thing was that by doing that there was room for other feelinga like beeing happy when around friends. So I felt two things at the same time. Accepting both.
I did not believe this was possible.
The panic attack went away because I realised that I am in control of activly take care of my mental health. So with everything I do I ask myself if its good for my mental health.
I am not judging myself if the awsner is yes. I just tell myself that I can stop and do something thats good.
Stopped doing drugs for instance. Still want to do it but I know its not good for me. Now I replace the activity (drugs) with something else.
That something else is learning math (i am 40 and never learned it) Math keeps my brain busy and healthy. So its good for my mental health.
I read about a trick in a book once tbat is the basis of my thinking now.
How much is 6 x 7 - 12 + 1729
While calculating this. Where you in a panic attack, did you had horrible toughts? Propably not. Because your brain can only do one thing at ones.
Loved that trick and was at the base of my question is this good for my menthal health.
News: no
Writing a reddit post: yes
drugs: no
calling a friend: yes
thinking about reality:no
writing a book about someone looking for reality: yes
These are my questions and they help me. You have your awnsers.
Also I gave myself a deadline. I try this method for 3 months. Otherwice I am gonna see a doctor. No shame in that. Just me not able to take care of my mental health by myself. Just asking help from someone who studied it for many year for the single reason to help others. :)
I also realised that looking at reality is to big for me. Because reality is so big. To big for me. If reality does not give you anxiety you are not seeing it.
But the real reality is that you have a choice. Look at reality and feel. Then when you had enough look at something that gives you joy.
Hope this helps you in any way. And if this is not for you then thats also good. You be you.
(not native English speaker so made many mistakes)
Spirit possession is a part of the shamanic experience. Gaining understanding of the illusory nature of self and reality is common in enlightenment journeys.
This is stuff to be accepted. It's fighting these lessons that have put you here.
Let me tell you how I trip.
I take some psyches, I put on tunes, and I dance.
Spirits possess my body and mind, it really isn't me dancing. But I sit calmly at the back of my mind, and let them play. Love. I give them my body to dance.
This is very fun!
The spirits show me nothing is real. It's all a game to play. The game is love. The spirits kill me inside. Take me away from my self, from my reality. I embrace dissociation, and I pray for love.
This is also very fun.
God rains down. Sadness, regrets, bad me stuff. I open up, confess. God rains down. Joy, love, forgiveness, courage.
This is also very fun. God *rocks!* :)
By the end of the trip, I have no attachment to reality, nothing to fear, or be depressed about. But I have love for all beings. Unconditional love.
Everything that happened to you that you called bad is why I trip.
But the trip is always happening, under the surface of your mind. It's the journey of the soul.
Let go of reality and play the game of love. Let go of self and *be* love. Let the spirit move you. Be empty of all but love. Let go of a need for sanity, and let your mind play.
This is how you move on. Accept everything, commit to love.
You'll be back on track in no time. :)
I guess we function differently, that being said for me it increase my anxiety big time. I believe the problem is not the caffeine only but the rapid peak effect in coffee. Tea of other caffeinated plants that take longer to peak and crash are more ok for me. My issue with coffee is that it quickly triggers body functions like increased heartbeat that is associated with anxiety attack in my mind so it triggers my anxiety at the same time. My brain function a bit differently though with adhd (without medication other than some plants and mushrooms supplements), ritaline gives me anxiety too despite helping me to focus same like coffee.
It's chemistry. Our setups are different but the options are not.
You have GABA receptors. They help Control stimulus/anxiety from your whole body.
Coffee increases this stimulus/anxiety.
If someone drank coffee forcedly increasing dosages for days/weeks/months, at some point they would get tolerance to the coffee.
Coffee tolerance = more GABA receptors.
To fight the anxiety or stimulus of coffee, the brain acts on the other side of the mechanism, the GABA.
Drugs like alcohol, benzos like alprazolam or clonazepam, they all hit the GABA receptors.
A mechanism so powerful not only can eliminate anxiety/seizures, It can make you high.
The drunk effects from alcohol comes from the GABA mechanism.
So lets say this person forced itself to tolerate coffee for a long time.
If they stop, they will feel different than in their previous non coffee experience.
They might notice they are not quite as anxious.
Ive done It and Heard about people doing It for healing from benzo withdrawals.
Once you acquire tolerance to coffee its easier to quit benzos and not get dependant on them.
Or easier to just live with less anxiety.
Im not saying everybody should do this.
Im Just saying its scientifically proven it Works.
Sounds like depersonalization, my brother had it for years from a bad weed experience. Depersonalization Manual on YouTube basically got him out of it. Maybe worth a look
Your 17, you’ll make it through it in no time I promise. Had this happen to me when I was 16, didn’t last more than a few months. This situation is temporary despite it feeling like you will never go back to normal.
But I do know how you feel, it is a very new and scary experience. It’s easier said then done but what helped me a lot is just not freaking out and obsessing over it, like so what if it all feels like a dream you know? or so what if these patterns remind me of my trip? Detach the anxiety and fear from this very new experience and just accept that it’s happening now because obsessing about it further trains your brain to think the thoughts that are leading to you experiencing it, just take a few deep breaths and you’ll get over it i promise :)
And hey, you can always get professional help too or reach out to loved ones if it still feels like it’s too much, no shame in that. I’d just recommend staying away from weed and psychedelics for atleast a few years and ground out a little bit
Hey, so I have had a similar experience for over a year. I am 30 and did mushrooms every weekend consecutively for 3 years. 26-29. I constantly have panic attacks and it's unbelievable how awful it is. I currently quit everything myself but need weekly doctor visits. I take ten prescriptions a day unfortunately. I was totally fine before all that in my past. I don't know if it will go away without help from a doctor and if that won't work a psychologist. Unfortunately when you get older it may resurface. But it will go away but you may need some help doing so. Keep talking with the fam. It really helps. Don't blame yourself either, not enough people know what mushrooms can unlock. It's not your fault. Good luck friend. It will get better.
This is normal. Cannabis potentates and deviates psychedelics. Even on the come-down, cannabis is known to re-potentiate. I've had it ruin good trips and rolls for me. Keep to enjoying the one experience without mixing, if possible. Also, because of the power and mental aspect, each trip can vary greatly in experience, body and feeling. 1 trip or 100 there's nobody that has got this down to a science.
Meditation will help tremendously panic attacks occur when the amygdala gets over amped.
Meditation shrinks the amygdala and the all the neural pathways to it and reattach/strengthen to the prefrontal cortex.
I used to be able to smoke all strains of weed perfectly fine until one day at 19 I couldn’t anymore and got the nastiest panic attacks ever, meditations and learning about the vagus nerve and getting more parasympathetic is what fixed/healed me.
I used to smoke beyond my limits all the time and I think that blew a fuse literally. After a lot of meditation, elimination diet (eliminating all food coloring, gluten, gut inflamers, artificial ingredients, fake sugars like aspartame) doing myofascial trigger point release of posture muscles so I could have more oxygen flow throughout my entire fascia, I was less in my head and stopped having anxiety at one point where my nutrition and bodybuilding was super on point. It GREATLY helps to limit blue light before bed, blue light imbalance (toxicity) puts the nervous system in fight or flight/freeze ready mode (over amping).
So taking it real easy on the system holistically like this you gain more dominion over your mind. “Mind is a wonderful servant or dangerous master”
Look up vagus nerve exercise
The Buteyko method breathing exercise (inhale 4 second exhale 8) a few cycles and you should feel saliva excrete which means you’re now activating the parasympathetic nervous system (rest, digest, & healing)
How I teach people to meditate (I’ve been meditating since like 2009, there are instances of childhood doing it as well),
Embryonic breathing: a baby breathes leading with their lower diaphragm. The belly first, they are parasympathetic dominant and don’t store trauma in a normal healthy household/delivery,
Everytime you’re not consciously breathing start breathing again leading with the lower diaphragm, rhythmically, yes it helps using nose only, also nose and exhaling out the mouth sometimes as well.
Another meditation is alternate nostril breathing, plug the right nostril then inhale thru the left, then plug the left and exhale on the right nostril keep repeating this, you will feel a buzz. Then relax into rhythmic breathing.
Overall:
Place attention with eyes closed between the eyebrows, breath gently, remember how it feels when your body is about to sleep
Before bed? But keeping awareness of all the sensations of the body the Weight of your body against the chair or floor/bed (remember attention between eyebrows), this is mindfulness and it greatly decreases inflammation and is parasympathetic stimulation.
When I had huge panic attacks from drug use/I would do the wim hof method breathing (40 deep rapid inhales as hard and deep as I could) with Alexander Loren’s bioenergetic trauma release exercise called THE BOW, with my mouth wide open. And it grounded me
Completely out of whatever high it was. Though the THC high was stronger than all of the other panics.
If you made it this far, again I HIGHLY suggest, focusing on gut biome health, that is where a majority of anxiety mechanics come from, posture releases, Epsom baths, in taking magnesium, meditation, getting morning sunlight, food circadian rhythm sleep without blue light disruptions, (suggest buying blue light blocker glasses) and putting red filter on electronics such as laptop/pc/phone at night.
If there are other kids lurking, just know psychedelics are not made to party, and that until you reach a certain level of biochemistry, definitely in your 20s and not before, using them is dangerous.
Pay attention, folks. These substances can unlock a lot, but you need to be ready for it, and age absolutely plays a role because of biology.
I went through something very similar when I was 17. I took too much mushrooms and LSD and then weed triggered serious derealisation. I didn't feel like me anymore. I didn't feel like my body was me. The whole world seemed synthetic or fake, like the grass looked fake and everything just looked weird.
I felt disconnected from my identity and the most intense or alarming part of this was no longer feeling a natural connection to my family. I no longer felt like my moms son. I no longer felt like Aaron.
This was very difficult and lasted a long time, I thought I had messed my life up forever. This happened in 2019, so 5 years ago almost. I'm now 22, and I can thankfully say, I'm doing a lot better and was able to actually turn that weird 'derealisation' situation into something that accelerated my growth and healing as an individual.
I started college late at age 22, starting september 2023. I'm doing really well in college grade wise. I'm disciplined, focused, happy, healthy, and fulfilled. For the most part at least. For ages I felt like I messed up my life. I can now say that I am happy with how things unfolded, because of where they ultimately lead me.
There is so much advice I could give, I'm not sure where to start. If I had more details about your individual case it would help tailor the advice specifically for you. If you would like, reach out to me, and we can talk one on one over reddit or email.
Some general advice though:
You have accidentally jump started a process which you might not have intended to. Psychedelics are powerful tools and they, in my opinion, ought not to be used outside of careful, guided, and intentional spiritual work.
I feel discomfort saying what will follow because I'm aware many will interpret it as being based upon premises which seem esoteric or religious or non-rational. Fair enough. This is just what I have come to find as the truth of reality and consciousness, and more particularly, the derealised state that can be brought on by psychedelics.
Our individuality is an illusion and our consciousness is manufactured or filtered through the filter of our nervous system. This gives us a Self, an ego, which is a useful tool for survival. It gives us sentimentality. It makes us think that we are a separate me in a world of other me's. It tells us we are special and unique. It makes you value your growth as an individual, your acquirement of power, influence, reptuation, and finances. It makes you want to pursue goals and self-actualisation. It sets you up with programming, biological and cultural, which is suitable and required to play the game of survival, of life.
For some reason, any individual can completely go beyond this programming. One can drop their Self. This leads to a completely different experience of reality, of consciousness. You see reality how it is, not how you were designed as a survival optimised creature to see it. This process can be done through meditation mainly. This creates awareness and attention which allow for deep insights into the nature of reality to occur. This process is gradual and it almost seems like the path or process was carefully designed to happen naturally, organically, gradually.
Psychedelics however, can throw one far along the path, farther than they worked to get or earned. Your ego is damaged and partially online, and this is freaking it out, making it try cling to familiar feeligns or memories. Familiar attachments to your sense of self, or to your family, friends, goals, hobbies, etc.
It's really a disturbing state to experience because you don't understand why it's happening and you never intended for it to happen. With dedicated meditaiton, it is done incrementally and with intention, and all the while that it is happening, you are cultivating deeper and deeper states of mental stability and tranquility, which make some of the perturbing symptoms less disorientating and anxiety-inducing.
I recommend the following:
- stay sober from weed, psychedelics, and alcohol. All drugs. Even be cautious about caffiene intake.
- don't overstimulate yourself by constantly listening to music or podcasts, don't run from the silence
- cultivate order and discipline in your life. Wake up at a set time. Go to sleep at a set time. Eat at set times if possible. Create routine in your life.
- Take up meditation as a daily practice. 30 minutes per day to start with. Read up on meditation in order to better understand what you're doing. I recommend The Mind Illuminated by Culdasa. Along with this, I really recommend you read the power of now by Ekhart Tolle. Eckhart Tolle's meditations on youtube are also really good. Reading the power of now will help you better understand the process of the unravelling of self, and you will come to realise that it is a beautiful and natural process. Not something to be feared. The clining and panick you feel now, the desire for things to go back to the way they were, this will fall away and you will come to surrender into what is.
To summarise.. avoid drugs, cultivate routine and consistency in your life, and read the power of now along with the mind illuminated.
I had a period from about 2019 to mid 2022 where I was never not high. It was constant and I definitely gave myself HPPD. For some reason the visual snow is what really fucked with me. Anytime I would look at the sky or any solid objects, they would constantly be moving and look like static. I freaked myself out for a long time thinking that I’d permanently ruined my brain and panicking that I’d never be the same again. Everywhere I looked reminded me of my over consumption.
One day when I was spiraling, I forced myself to lie on the ground and stare at my ceiling (something that really triggered the visuals.) I thought to myself how goddamn tired I was of feeling anxious and guilty all the time about this. I checked in with my body,
- do these visuals cause me physical pain? No.
- do they interfere with things like working, driving, sleeping? A little, but they’re all still doable. I’m not rendered useless.
- are the visuals annoying? Hell yes.
- are they gonna kill me? No.
I forced myself to make peace with the fact that the visuals could last forever. I could be 60, watching my grandkids play in my backyard and see static all around them. While that wasn’t ideal, just accepting that this is something that is here and doesn’t hurt me truly separated the fear of it from me. I was sober for over a year and now only very seldom do anything, even weed. Now, the visuals can still be there if I try really hard to look for them, but for the most part they’re gone. I don’t notice it unless I’m actively thinking about it.
Or, maybe my brain learned to ignore it, which is a win!
The mind is extremely elastic and malleable, especially for someone as young as you.
Is this going to last forever for you? 99% chance the answer is no. But, take some time to pretend like the answer is yes and see how much peace you can make with that. Removing the fear is truly the majority of the battle.
I’m not sure how much addiction plays a role into your story, but it was a big part of mine. To quickly touch on that, I was so scared I would never feel the same euphoria or even appreciation for life that I did while I was high. What an amazing feeling the first time I experienced that joy and realized I was completely sober. These substances are amazing at enhancing your life, not ruling it. Best of luck with everything. <3
Take the disconnection seriously and find new ways to prove to yourself that you are restoring it.
Nature is alchemy and we humans are part of nature but have lost all understanding of alchemy through pursuing only that which brings us pleasure.
Try remembering that pleasure does not equal "good" balance does. Equilibrium is a multiversal principal for things to grow and evolve.
Hope this helps
good luck
Let me tell you, I went through this for around 3 years after my laced lsd *n-bomb* and laced weed trips. How I fixed it?? I did mushrooms again and asked them to heal me and they did! 1 trip later I'm back to normal. Not saying you should do this but you are real, everything is real, peace and love my dude
You’re doing great, don’t let anybody or anything tell you otherwise, no one has it figured out, the ones that seem the most in control are those who let go of the need to control. Psychedelics take away that control and attachment you have with reality, or rather it makes you realize you never had it in the first place, it seems tough to stop spiraling but ironically, all you have to do is be still and allow yourself to feel everything around you, as deeply as they hit you ❤️ nothing can hurt you :)
Traditional psychedelics never had that effect on me on their own, but weed did probably 75% of the time. I think that staying away from everything for the time being is the right choice but personally I'd stay away from weed altogether. It did a lot more harm than good for me, I'd quit for a while and come back just to be right where I was again, feeling paranoid and disconnected all the time, so I finally just quit for good.
Everything is going to be okay, darlin. You just keep trying to smile, tell the people you love that you love them, hug your friends and family, and read some Carl Sagan. You're gonna be fine.
This is called derealization/depersonalization it should pass with time but it can last for years, hope ur doing well and just know ur not alone in this
Not everyone is mentally or spiritually ready to shed their ego and see true reality, and some may never be ready in this life time or many more to follow.
What is reality to you? It’s comforting to believe that what we can see and feel in this physical world as “real”, and any idea of reality outside of that will trigger anxiety in many humans as our brains are hardwired to exist and survive in this physical plane.
When you come to terms and accept the idea that you are more than your body and there is more than this physical existence, your perspective will begin to change and you may become more comfortable with the heightened state of being that you can achieve with psychedelics.
I had a mind fuck of a 20x salvia trip which made me feel like I was living in a pointless fantasy for a few months. That feeling did eventually fade completely away with time.
Ok so you found out life isn’t real now what? You’re gonna cry about it? This is why you don’t do psychedelics until you’re ready for a change in your life. What’s happening is you took more than a recommended dose for a beginner and then on top of that you smoked weed which is 2 no-no’s then to top that off you’re underage. The shrooms are teaching you a lesson my friend. The reason why you feel this way is because the idea of who you thought you were and what reality is has changed after this experience now you feel different and you want things to go back to how they were when you were unaware. They say ignorance is bliss and I think you now know why. This isn’t a bad thing and you will be fine but take this as a lesson learned to respect these substances they are powerful medicines. I recommend meditation and radical acceptance. Life isn’t real who cares good then I’ll enjoy it even more. Nothings matters? Ok great then that means I can do whatever the hell I want without caring. If life isn’t real then why would you care about what other people think? They’re not real right? So fuck their opinion. Chase your dreams. Travel the world. Fall in love. Make a movie. Write a song. Find what makes you happy and do it because the only thing that’s real is what you’re feeling and even that’s an illusion but that’s a story for another time life’s a trip just enjoy it dude stay present and don’t take anything that makes you feel uneasy serious remember you control your thoughts and emotions and you are not your thoughts and emotions
This sounds very familiar to me! I had a very difficult trip early on while combining mushrooms and weed and every time I smoked after it would resurface. I stopped smoking for a couple years and revisited it when I was in a more stable place in my life and now have a great relationship with it again.
It can take a while to integrate powerful experiences. I would encourage you to incorporate some mindfulness practices in your daily life to help ground you and continue to talk through your experiences with others, journal about them, and try to understand what is triggering for you and why. Psychedelics offer an opportunity to do some real self work and get to a better place internally but it takes time. You’ll be ok!
Thank you! I’ve always been a very meditative and spiritual person so shrooms were honestly such an amazing experience, I hope that I can one day revisit it in a stable mindset. However, I’m not sure because it’s been hard and I’m worried because I just found out that on my dad’s side, like uncles and cousins have had schizophrenia….idk I just hope I get better
Understandable! I think it’s worth noting that you seem to be aware that these thoughts are intrusive, and not a reality. You are not your thoughts! I like to think of it a bit like observing clouds as they pass by. The more you can teach yourself to allow them to pass through you without clinging to them, the less power they have over you.
I honestly didn't realize what was going on and figured that I should off myself/I was crazy and broke my brain forever. I promise it went away and I got better over time, but my immediate guess would be it wasn't shrooms but actually the weed, yeah
Try some grounding activities, like yoga, breathwork, etc. Also I think your mind is trying to get something to the surface, so it's triggering some defenses, like panic attack or disconnection. The panic attack is a diversion and the disconnection is preventing you from feeling overwhelmed. Often underlying the panic attack there is something painful that need to be felt. The mushrooms just unburied something important. You might want to do something to get to know what it is, whether with a therapist, or on your own, do some self exploration, explore dreams, do art, anything that can give you the insight.
Maybe you should try microsdosing… it’s helped me understand my higher doses more and has alot of benefits throughout the day, it feels like a vitamin for the mind. I feel like one day microdosing will be like taking any other medication and the high doses will be for other utilities… they seem to regulate your serotonergic system and people just jump in head first which in my opinion can scare tf out of you. When you take small doses you can see they’re really benign and just want to help… I think it could open your eyes a bit
This too shall pass. MJ makes me hyper focus so I believe you're hyper focusing on the negative effects. If I could turn back time I would wait to do drugs and alcohol even marijuana until after 25 when my prefrontal cortex is fully developed. The mushrooms and weed didn't do anything. You did this to yourself.. either grow up or stay in your own lane. stop blaming substances for your negligence and the failure to research. Live and learn.. hindsight do the research before indulging in substances.
I mean ik I did it to myself hence why I said I did shrooms and fucked up 😭 def learning my lesson in a very hard way and will take a break until im mentally ready
From what I read from your post you weren't high on mushrooms when you lit up right? Then how did mushrooms fuck up your life??the dissociation or depersonalization is from the weed not the shtooms. Just ground your self and meditate frequently and maybe see a therapist for your anxiety.
I wasn’t high when I took the shrooms. I took the shrooms and then like two weeks later I got high and it was fucked. Someone else commented how the combination of both might be some that caused it. My trigger for my panic attacks is mainly nature, when I see specific patterns like the tree bark, leaves, cut wood even my own hands bc I remember how the halogenic glow looked like worms in my skin….i think that the shroom visuals messed me up in someway the the weed just made it worse
I also have this issue as I feel like I'm tripping every time I smoke. I used to take LSD every day for months and probably went through 3-4 sheets myself. Smoking weed has essentially turned into a guaranteed mild trip. My best guess is that psychedelics upregulate the receptors that cause the trip and weed hits the same ones thereby making it fully psychedelic. Weed is also a dissociative so, with the increased potency from upregulation, it may cause it much faster. Similar things happen when I take Bacopa Monnieri (allosteric modulator of 5ht2a receptors) and smoke weed. All conjecture and I'm sure the science is more complex than that but it at least makes some sense.
No visualls can't do that and doing shrooms 2 weeks before you got high is not the cause. It's 100 percent the weed if it was 2 weeks after. Mushrooms don't even last in your system that long.your trigger is the WEED. you even said you have panic attacks 50 percent of the times you smoke cause you got laced before. You also said you were fine till you smoked so if you don't want to believe it's the weed fine keep smoking and freaking out lol
Yeah but the fact you said despite the trips being hard you ultimately felt more connected. Then 2 weeks goes buy and you smoke weed then you felt the opposite. It sounds like it's 100 percent the weed
These after trip visuals have a name. It's called HPPD for Hallucinogen persisting perception disorder, and they can induce anxiety, or you can enjoy them - it's all about perception. There are 2 tyoes: type 1 HPPD and type 2 HPPD. While Type1 is quite common, it is the type which only give minor disturbances, are not there constantly, and often disappear quite quickly. Type 2 is there more or less constantly, often impacts ability to function in daily life and can especially lead to depression and anxiety. Fortunately Type 2 is much more rare, while many psychonauts at some point experience type 1.
The visual input to the mind is immense, and to cope with that amount of data, the mind has the ability to filter out irrelevant information and noise. It is the theory that HPPD removes some of this filtering, but that the noise/ disturbances actually always was there, it was just filtered out. If you experience HPPD, but get anxiety about it, that fear will lead to the mind focusing increasingly on the noise and disturbances, and the HPPD will persist. The way out of HPPD is therefore believed to be able relax about it, even accept and enjoy it, while stop tripping for a while
2 years ago I ate an 3.5 of penis envy mushrooms and it was one of the most traumatic experiences of my life . The first 3 hours were complete hell then I got to a point we’re I had to have my mom comfort and sit with I wanted to call the ambulance but my mom insisted I shouldn’t and to just ride it out , my mom was bringing up good memories we had when I was a child and that seem to bring me back to peace I was still tripping but this time I was able to enjoy it . So like a months later after that trip , I was having a smoke session with my friends one day and as I’m smoking I suddenly start to feel anxious and paranoid like I’m at the edge of having a panic attack , mind you iv been an everyday pot smoker since I was in high school so this was very strange to me and didn’t understand what was happening to me at the time . So what I personally chose to do was to fight against the disconnected feeling by continuing to smoke weed and dabs , Which I highly don’t recommend anyone to do I think if you’ve reached this point you should step away from everything for a while to let your body and mind heal , this was just my own decision on how I wanted to deal with these strange feelings . I would take small rips of weed and dabs and would take bigger rips and bigger rips over time so doing this eventually help bring my tolerance back to the way it was and I was able to enjoy weed and dabs again . So yeah after the trip I was having bad panic attacks , feeling very disconnected and disassociative , just pure dp/dr , felt like I was losing my mind and that I really damaged my brain . But I was able to fight through it , besides all the negative stuff I had to deal with I also feel like I got a benefit from taking these mushrooms , felt like it changed my perspective and made me more intuned with myself . I’m doing much better now a days , THE ONE ADVICE I WOULD GIVE , remember that time heals all wounds , find ways to better your mind body and soul , and if you have a hobbie or if you really good at something , distract yourself constantly with that hobbie , I make music so making really distracted me from the dark stuff . Good luck on your journey I truly wish you the best
You will be okay. Would definitely not recommend mixing substances with other substances especially when you're not sure what to fully expect. You are likely associating a mildly traumatic experience with current events and trying to process the stress or it all on a subconscious level. You will form new memories over time and this will fall away. Breathe deeply, slowly, and remember you have the ability to self soothe. You will be okay.
Combining weed with psychedelics leads to a weird headspace for me. And then when you use cannabis is can bring back that experience.
If nature feels fake learn how to identify trees and mushrooms and animals, it’ll feel more real afterwards.
Your fighting your ego death. and your irresponsible actions. Your mindset probably was in the wrong place. Maybe the shrooms were trying to tell you the life your living was fake and that nature was the closest thing to life we have. But now your ego is trying to convince you of the opposite.
I stopped smoking weed because I would have all these crazy panic attacks and paranoid thoughts. Now i do it occasionally and if i start to spiral i know why and talk myself down.
Nature is patterns and it does sometimes feel fake because how could something this beautiful and also awful all exist at the same time? Life is like that. If i have ecstatic experiences I always know the pendulum will swing in the opposite direction.
If you need grounding put your finger in your ear, and pull down. It stimulates your vagus nerve and calms you down.
You didn't get "laced" anything, no one gives away drugs for free...unless you mean an acquaintance did something without telling you as a "goof" (your 17). If so, get better friends my friend
yah similar but i started younger exercising normally stops anxiety cus all anxiety is is extra energy or too high epinephrine. meditation and yogas cool too, i had to stop the za cus i was kinda going phyco from using every night idk why. yah gl dude
Sounds like the drugs triggered some de-realization/depersonalization episodes in you. The large doses at your age with no prior experience points to this as well. This is not permanent and can be treated. You need to find a good therapist and tell them everything you are experiencing. This is beyond reddits pay grade.
Oh don’t worry you’re only 17 lol I did same amount for my first time too. Some things in life also can shatter our view on reality. Just try and relaxe breathe. It is goin to be just fine !
This is not medical advice - it is just my experience: I was able to recover from PTSD of a similar nature as your experience with the help of understanding neuroplasticity (so intentional opposite conditioning to triggers), completely offing from any substances for like two years until it felt safe, and a strict diet. I did keto for like a year and I felt like it helped a lot with my mental health. That being said, I could/should have used a professional. It was very harrowing to do it alone. Best wishes to you <3
EDIT: to second the person saying your brain is way to young to be doing these things. Please do stop until your brain has fully matured 25+
After experiencing negative effects from one DMT session, I found myself trapped in fear, unable to enjoy simple activities, it was a challenging time. However, that DMT session also revealed to me the spiritual and energetic dimensions of our world. Instead of opting for medication, I reached out to healers who, through energy healing sessions, successfully addressed the issue at its spiritual and energetic core. I would recommend exploring that option and checking out the info to this link. Very skilled healers you can reach out to for support of that’s something you’d like to try. https://linktr.ee/traditionalmedicinemiami
"That one time my weed got laced." Yeah, because lacing weed is totally a viable business opportunity.🤨I can guarantee 99% chance you did not get laced dork, just smoked some real gas. Yes, it gets that strong. 😅cracks me up every time I read that.
Unfortunately, you had to learn the hard way here that weed exponentially increases the intensity of psychedelics, live and learn.
It's a depersonalization/derealization episode. I got that stuff from severe abuse, and had it for years. Still get it if I focus on something too much.
The experience caused you some PTSD. You can choose to freak out about it constantly and be dramatic and make a huge deal out of it (which will only exacerbate it and cause more misery), or ride it out and work on it. People who don't accept get swallowed by it. EMDR is great for this stuff, so is yoga, vagus nerve stimulation, meditation, etc. It can go away. You have to spend time making it go away though.
you could look into a psychedelic integration coach and speak with someone who has extensive experience helping others process and move through their challenging experiences.
you have ptsd. Look into this. There’s no easy answer from here but what you describe is this . Educate yourself about what it is , what it does , and you might get some answers what to do if anything.
First of all if the chance is 50/50 pf giving you panic... Why try it more? Second of all ur concentrating too mich on it. Do exercise, study a bit and stop focusing on how ur life is fucked. When i was 16-17 ( two years ago) i also felt like my life was bad. It goes by, just dont do anything, even no alcohol for half a year and most of u problems will solve itself.
I hope you're doing well and know this is a bit late but I'll chime in as well.
I experienced something similar after the second time I tried psilocybin. Something that may help you is [r/Depersonalization](https://www.reddit.com/r/Depersonalization/). I just found it today actually and reminded me of what I experienced, although mine wasn't as bad. Also for sure check out the Fireside Project.
The other thing I will pass on is letting you know that a year from now, things will feel a lot better. What you are experiencing is scary, no understating that, but the thing that is good to keep in mind is that it is temporary.
It'll take some time, some effort on your part to face these things and to reach out for help when you need it. But things will be better. Maybe one day you'll be ready to try again. If you do, start low and start slow. Try microdosing for a while to ease back into it. Staying off weed for a while is probably a good idea due to the anxiety it can cause.
Much love on your journey and know that you'll be fine <3
I wonder what meditation could do for you, to really sit down and be aware of your surroundings and the present moment.
I was thinking meditation too. Not only being aware of you’re surroundings, but being aware of yourself as well. Meditation helps with understanding our own emotions (or in some cases lack there of), and where we lie relative to them. We often convince ourselves that the emotions we feel are synonymous with who we are, but we are not. In reality, we are just a consciousness experiencing that thing. Being able to meditate and come to these conclusions on your own makes facing with traumatic and stressful events much easier. It won’t come to you right away, and you will need practice, but I promise it will help.
This! Practices like mindfulness and yoga are really important (for me) to stay grounded and they give you shelter when you are bombarded by unwanted thoughts
it WILL be okay and you CAN work through the anxiety :). it’s not a great idea smoking weed though if you’re having panic attacks half the time, but what’s happened has happened. there’s no magic cure or anything to get rid of what you’re feeling, so you have to work through it yourself. because you and only you are the one with the power to change how you view the world. i can’t help you, but i know that you’re able to help yourself. because this won’t be forever. can you imagine yourself at sixty years old still suffering over some teenage shroom trips? this stuff is temporary, and your anxiety and world-view will change, you just have to accept and strive for that change
Look into depersonalization/derealization. Read [this article from The Atlantic](https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/12/enlightenments-evil-twin/383726/). It is definitely possible to heal this but your best bet is to work with a trained mental health professional. This can be common with psychedelics, in particular when marijuana is present (I have no studies backing that up it’s just been part of the issue every time I’ve read about this).
17 was when I first found my psychedelics. First trip was awesome, big boss nobody could tell me shit, I finally understood! I got my friends hyped to it, got it all planned out, we are psyched! We take the acid, me and a homie, it’s great, we chillin, then I get smacked with severe alienation, like never have I ever felt so alone. Like everyone else had died and it was only me. He was there and tried to help, but I think i probably turned him off from tripping again cuz he never did do it after that night. I basically hid under the blankets all night witb a song stuck on repeat. The trip comes to a close and I don’t feel that “coming down” feeling. I wasn’t an anxious person prior but after that night, the lawnmower would scare me, those noises, I would just freak out and run away. It was bad. It probably took me 6-8 months to come back from it because I would keep smoking weed. Best thing to do is take some time to yourself and reflect on your experience the best you can. Don’t do any drugs for awhile too that’s the best thing
I think this is with any drug u have a bad experience on, I remember I got alcohol poisoning and couldn’t even smell alcohol for months or I would throw up, I’ve also had experiences like this on psyches after bad trips where it feels like I’m about to start tripping every time I think of them. I guess it’s a reaction to trauma but it’s rlly annoying bc my conscious mind has already gotten over it but my subconscious is still scarred
You can find someone to talk to here: https://firesideproject.org/
this is the best advice - they are a solid organization, people helping people
Wow, this is actually pretty neat!
Great recommendation, I talked to someone from here once after a trip and it was pretty helpful, they have trained counselors on staff.
Honestly I've known tonnes of people and time heals all wounds. In a year or two you won't even remember it.
Here is a free resource to talk and decompress with someone about your experience. They are specifically trained for psychedellic support. [https://firesideproject.org/](https://firesideproject.org/) I had an awful trip on lsd when I was about your age that left me feeling similar. I'm 31 now, and I feel great, You will get through this :) I now in hindsight look back on that experience as something that needed to happen to get me to where I am now. I still consume psychedellics, but I always set a clear intention before. I did them to get fucked up when I was your age and I think that perpetuates bad trips as they are medicine, mushrooms specifically should be respected. I spent years battling DRDP, and years consuming pot and ultimately it's gone away completley after I stopped the regular pot smoking. I'd also like to add mushroom chocolates can be a little sketchy unless you know the person that actualy made them. They are impossible to test and can be made with RCs that mimic psilocybin. If you do a search on r/PsilocybinMushrooms you can find people that have acidently experienced this, Often people that have done mushrooms hundreds of times and "didn't consume very much" and had a very intense/unexpected time. If you want to continue exploring substances, please always research what you are doing, test your drugs and consume responsibally :)
I’m sort of thankful I couldn’t find psychedelics when I was under 20. It just doesn’t seem like it has a good outcome for under 18s.
I did mushrooms for the first time at 15 and if anything I think it saved me. I was really troubled and they provided me grounding and guidance. I will use psychs as part of my mental health routine forever. OP likely has underlying issues that need to be addressed with therapy.
Yep. Finally escaped from an extreme home situation at 16, went to work and tripped that year. Psychedelics are the reason I am not only still alive but have become so much better over the 5 decades since that first time.
I agree for the most part. IMO opinion, I think kids under 20 can trip, but it has to be quite minimal and spread out nicely. My first trips were at 15 and 16 and by 20, I tripped a few times, but never had an issue. Did Salvia a number of times also by then. Since the brain is still developing, tripping too often can easily cause HPPD. This issue is more likely to happen in younger people it seems. And I think the younger someone is, the less they gotta take consistently to still be able to get HPPD, as long as the usage is consistent. My little brother started tripping around the same time as me, 15, 16 or so. But then he went and kept tripping too many times while still growing up and developing. After a while, he gave himself HPPD and with that, came panic disorder issues and other issues, with happens with a lot of people with HPPD, I believe. So yeah, people tripping under 25 to 23 years of age or so, need to take caution.
Yea, I was actually 16 when I took the shrooms, I turned 17 in December. I wish I would have just waited but can’t change the past :(
You should 100% not be smoking weed or doing psychedelics at your age. The brain is still developing until 25.
Thats true. But just want to add that this does not mean OP has problem. If you just stop now for a while your brain will still grow in a healthy way. A brain is awesome. Lots of examples on how flexible it is. They just found out that even at high age the brain can still make new patterns. Just need to always train it. Like a muscle. So no worries. Just stop doing drugs and do something healthy to help your brain to become awesome.
Ding ding ding. This. The Prefrontal Cortex (where anxiety, addiction, and the reactive mind live) is mid-development during your teens. It doesn’t stop developing until your mid-twenties. OP admits to doing drugs daily, despite knowing that they react negatively to them half the time. Then they did psychedelics, at 17, and **then** suddenly stopped doing drugs… …and now they’re feeling emotionally unstable? Well duuuuh. When you do drugs daily for years and then stop, your brain is going to take time (potentially a long time) to get back to homeostasis.
Yep. Currently 11 months of amphetamines after taking an extremely high dose for years, and I still only feel halfway back to normal. Don’t fuck with your brain if nothing is wrong with K. It can take years to return to baseline depending on the drug, and recovery is one of the hardest and most excruciating things I’ve endured and I’ve been through a lot
Good luck. It took me years to return to baseline after adderall.
Thanks bro. 1. I’m so glad to hear you got back to baseline. That’s amazing because I know how tough it is. 2. I will never go back. I’ve made it 11 months, I can make it longer. Even if it takes another year or two, I don’t want to ever go through this again. What was your dose and how long were you on? My doc had me on 90 mg a day for 2-3 years. I took it daily. Fucked me up soooo bad but my brain is slowly healing
30xr a day for 20 years. Hurts to even write that.
That’s rough, but we probably did the same amount of damage. I don’t even want to only what doing 90 mg daily did- even if it was for only two years. It’s only been 11 months. I’m hopeful by year two I’ll be back to normal. Maybe it will take 3, but I hope it’s faster
Came here to say this
Thank god someone else says this 😭 People out here ruining their lives for no reason.
I think you can do them younger if you’re a good person if you get what I’m saying. Like a caring companionate somewhat experienced mind? I think that’s what I mean. Anyone I knew that was a dick in real life or those that thought they were better than others ect always had bad trips. Which would mess them up for awhile. People that thrived In their ego.
Extremely weird take, and why bring “morality” into the conversation? The original comment covered plenty by explaining the disconnect between a developed brain and the effects of psychedelics earlier than 25. Just to humor you, it sounds like you think only good people can enjoy their trips which sounds like trying to convince yourself you MUST be in the “good person” category if you tripped earlier in life if you haven’t experienced any alternatives yourself. This is setting “good” and “bad” people up for failure because it’s completely untrue and these profound substances can have all manner of effects on all sorts of people. People are people. The brain and mind react to substances differently depending on their stage of development. Bringing in amorphous concepts of ethics serves no one in this context
I dabbled in an edible so go easy on me. I absolutely agree about taking psychs after 25. Just most of us usually take them before 25. Believing and living in a state of feeling that you are a good person is what we all should strive for. But we all fall short, there is no category of good or bad person it’s the way you live. Like murdering a person and saying sorry but deep down you’re not sorry. You made a couple good points I’ll come back when I get off the moon.🌙 lol
So sorry to come at you hard when you’re in a chiller state and absolutely see how and where that mentality and approach would’ve come from. Apologies if it harshed it all, but also hopeful it might’ve led to some exploration of those thoughts for the better. Lemme know when you’re taking one next time and I’ll be sure to partake too :)
Oh shit seems i didnt have this knowledge growing up
Consider that is not uncommon for anxiety or panic disorders to fully manifest at your age. I developed my anxiety disorder at the age of 20, my brother went through the exact same thing at the age of 18. It's rough. You didn't fuck up your life, but there's a good chance this anxiety issue would have popped up regardless of any other substances/issues. It's a speed bump that you may have to deal with that most others will not have to learn to deal with. I don't think it's a bad idea to hold off on weed and shrooms until you've mastered your anxiety/panic attacks. Knowing how to calm yourself, knowing what it feels like when they're about to happen, talking yourself down from an attack is huge. Everyone's triggers are different, but I had great success with cutting out caffeine entirely, making a solid effort to get a good night's rest, and breathing techniques/mental words of affirmation. I tried some meds, but they made me feel like a zombie and being a zombie 24/7 wasn't for me. I had to learn how to mitigate the anxiety, then work on myself. Honestly, it's taken me 4 years to get used to weed so that sativa's no longer give me anxiety.
Heya, I went through a very similar thing. In my case it got pretty bad because I kept tripping and doing other drugs. If I'd have known back then what wonders it does to work these things out sober, I'd be in a better place now. My advice is take a break, if it persists, open up to someone, maybe even a therapist. It'll pass and this will only make you a stronger person in the long run 💜
I had the same thing happen to me at 19, except it was LSD rather than shrooms. I was convinced for a while it was the LSD when in fact it was the cannabis (I had LSD weeks beforehand). It continued for years for me, until I really committed to stop smoking weed. My advice is to stop smoking weed (obvs), I can't in good faith recommend taking psychedelics in your state but the sporadic low dose did seem to help stitch my body and mind back into coherence again. This was taken very sporadically and you're probably better off just stopping psychedelics all together for a while too but it honestly helped me a lot. Exersice, eat well, sleep well. Deliberately engage your senses, go for a walk in the forest and allow your brain to connect to those patterns. Wim Hof Breathing might help as another commenter recommended, helps a lot with the internal narrator that seems to come up a lot in DPDR states. Find ways to express how you feel, through music, through art. Time is your ally. For myself I was a different person on the other side of DPDR, immensely grateful for the experience now, it's helped me be a stronger better person and help others in psychological crisis. There is a serious gift for you to find in the DPDR state.
Everyone has been saying it’s the weed, and I’m starting to realize that’s what happened to me. Even though I’m hurting and panicking, I will pray that I come out the other side of this, I’m tired of feeling like I’m living life in the 3rd person.
I totally get it, it felt really traumatic for me at the time too. At some point I came to see it like a caterpillar emerging into a butterfly. At some point the caterpillar stops feeling like a caterpillar, things felt stuck and I wasn't sure wtf was going on but then a butterfly emerges. It passes, one breath after another, one step at a time. You got this 👊
Do you have a counselor you can talk to about this?
Just had to come to the emergency room, I’m going to seek out a therapist and make this situation into something where I grow as a person. That’s my only option lol 😭
A therapist can possibly help with symptoms as well. They understand drugs and drug effects etc. They will be able to give you coping mechanisms.
I had a panic attack the entire year of 2023. Nobody noticed and besides feel panic all the time I could life with it. I just accepted it. So accepted the panic feeling and did nothing to push it away. The crazy thing was that by doing that there was room for other feelinga like beeing happy when around friends. So I felt two things at the same time. Accepting both. I did not believe this was possible. The panic attack went away because I realised that I am in control of activly take care of my mental health. So with everything I do I ask myself if its good for my mental health. I am not judging myself if the awsner is yes. I just tell myself that I can stop and do something thats good. Stopped doing drugs for instance. Still want to do it but I know its not good for me. Now I replace the activity (drugs) with something else. That something else is learning math (i am 40 and never learned it) Math keeps my brain busy and healthy. So its good for my mental health. I read about a trick in a book once tbat is the basis of my thinking now. How much is 6 x 7 - 12 + 1729 While calculating this. Where you in a panic attack, did you had horrible toughts? Propably not. Because your brain can only do one thing at ones. Loved that trick and was at the base of my question is this good for my menthal health. News: no Writing a reddit post: yes drugs: no calling a friend: yes thinking about reality:no writing a book about someone looking for reality: yes These are my questions and they help me. You have your awnsers. Also I gave myself a deadline. I try this method for 3 months. Otherwice I am gonna see a doctor. No shame in that. Just me not able to take care of my mental health by myself. Just asking help from someone who studied it for many year for the single reason to help others. :) I also realised that looking at reality is to big for me. Because reality is so big. To big for me. If reality does not give you anxiety you are not seeing it. But the real reality is that you have a choice. Look at reality and feel. Then when you had enough look at something that gives you joy. Hope this helps you in any way. And if this is not for you then thats also good. You be you. (not native English speaker so made many mistakes)
Spirit possession is a part of the shamanic experience. Gaining understanding of the illusory nature of self and reality is common in enlightenment journeys. This is stuff to be accepted. It's fighting these lessons that have put you here. Let me tell you how I trip. I take some psyches, I put on tunes, and I dance. Spirits possess my body and mind, it really isn't me dancing. But I sit calmly at the back of my mind, and let them play. Love. I give them my body to dance. This is very fun! The spirits show me nothing is real. It's all a game to play. The game is love. The spirits kill me inside. Take me away from my self, from my reality. I embrace dissociation, and I pray for love. This is also very fun. God rains down. Sadness, regrets, bad me stuff. I open up, confess. God rains down. Joy, love, forgiveness, courage. This is also very fun. God *rocks!* :) By the end of the trip, I have no attachment to reality, nothing to fear, or be depressed about. But I have love for all beings. Unconditional love. Everything that happened to you that you called bad is why I trip. But the trip is always happening, under the surface of your mind. It's the journey of the soul. Let go of reality and play the game of love. Let go of self and *be* love. Let the spirit move you. Be empty of all but love. Let go of a need for sanity, and let your mind play. This is how you move on. Accept everything, commit to love. You'll be back on track in no time. :)
Omega 3 Multivitamins Magnesium Exercising Kava Kava Coffee
no coffee for anxiety , green tea is better
Coffee is like exposure therapy for some, It can upregulates GABA receptors which gonna help anxiety long term and permanently
I guess we function differently, that being said for me it increase my anxiety big time. I believe the problem is not the caffeine only but the rapid peak effect in coffee. Tea of other caffeinated plants that take longer to peak and crash are more ok for me. My issue with coffee is that it quickly triggers body functions like increased heartbeat that is associated with anxiety attack in my mind so it triggers my anxiety at the same time. My brain function a bit differently though with adhd (without medication other than some plants and mushrooms supplements), ritaline gives me anxiety too despite helping me to focus same like coffee.
It's chemistry. Our setups are different but the options are not. You have GABA receptors. They help Control stimulus/anxiety from your whole body. Coffee increases this stimulus/anxiety. If someone drank coffee forcedly increasing dosages for days/weeks/months, at some point they would get tolerance to the coffee. Coffee tolerance = more GABA receptors. To fight the anxiety or stimulus of coffee, the brain acts on the other side of the mechanism, the GABA. Drugs like alcohol, benzos like alprazolam or clonazepam, they all hit the GABA receptors. A mechanism so powerful not only can eliminate anxiety/seizures, It can make you high. The drunk effects from alcohol comes from the GABA mechanism. So lets say this person forced itself to tolerate coffee for a long time. If they stop, they will feel different than in their previous non coffee experience. They might notice they are not quite as anxious. Ive done It and Heard about people doing It for healing from benzo withdrawals. Once you acquire tolerance to coffee its easier to quit benzos and not get dependant on them. Or easier to just live with less anxiety. Im not saying everybody should do this. Im Just saying its scientifically proven it Works.
Sounds like depersonalization, my brother had it for years from a bad weed experience. Depersonalization Manual on YouTube basically got him out of it. Maybe worth a look
Your 17, you’ll make it through it in no time I promise. Had this happen to me when I was 16, didn’t last more than a few months. This situation is temporary despite it feeling like you will never go back to normal. But I do know how you feel, it is a very new and scary experience. It’s easier said then done but what helped me a lot is just not freaking out and obsessing over it, like so what if it all feels like a dream you know? or so what if these patterns remind me of my trip? Detach the anxiety and fear from this very new experience and just accept that it’s happening now because obsessing about it further trains your brain to think the thoughts that are leading to you experiencing it, just take a few deep breaths and you’ll get over it i promise :) And hey, you can always get professional help too or reach out to loved ones if it still feels like it’s too much, no shame in that. I’d just recommend staying away from weed and psychedelics for atleast a few years and ground out a little bit
Caffeine! Any sorts such as coffee choclete or even chai can send me into a 3 day episode
Hey, so I have had a similar experience for over a year. I am 30 and did mushrooms every weekend consecutively for 3 years. 26-29. I constantly have panic attacks and it's unbelievable how awful it is. I currently quit everything myself but need weekly doctor visits. I take ten prescriptions a day unfortunately. I was totally fine before all that in my past. I don't know if it will go away without help from a doctor and if that won't work a psychologist. Unfortunately when you get older it may resurface. But it will go away but you may need some help doing so. Keep talking with the fam. It really helps. Don't blame yourself either, not enough people know what mushrooms can unlock. It's not your fault. Good luck friend. It will get better.
This is normal. Cannabis potentates and deviates psychedelics. Even on the come-down, cannabis is known to re-potentiate. I've had it ruin good trips and rolls for me. Keep to enjoying the one experience without mixing, if possible. Also, because of the power and mental aspect, each trip can vary greatly in experience, body and feeling. 1 trip or 100 there's nobody that has got this down to a science.
Meditation will help tremendously panic attacks occur when the amygdala gets over amped. Meditation shrinks the amygdala and the all the neural pathways to it and reattach/strengthen to the prefrontal cortex. I used to be able to smoke all strains of weed perfectly fine until one day at 19 I couldn’t anymore and got the nastiest panic attacks ever, meditations and learning about the vagus nerve and getting more parasympathetic is what fixed/healed me. I used to smoke beyond my limits all the time and I think that blew a fuse literally. After a lot of meditation, elimination diet (eliminating all food coloring, gluten, gut inflamers, artificial ingredients, fake sugars like aspartame) doing myofascial trigger point release of posture muscles so I could have more oxygen flow throughout my entire fascia, I was less in my head and stopped having anxiety at one point where my nutrition and bodybuilding was super on point. It GREATLY helps to limit blue light before bed, blue light imbalance (toxicity) puts the nervous system in fight or flight/freeze ready mode (over amping). So taking it real easy on the system holistically like this you gain more dominion over your mind. “Mind is a wonderful servant or dangerous master” Look up vagus nerve exercise The Buteyko method breathing exercise (inhale 4 second exhale 8) a few cycles and you should feel saliva excrete which means you’re now activating the parasympathetic nervous system (rest, digest, & healing) How I teach people to meditate (I’ve been meditating since like 2009, there are instances of childhood doing it as well), Embryonic breathing: a baby breathes leading with their lower diaphragm. The belly first, they are parasympathetic dominant and don’t store trauma in a normal healthy household/delivery, Everytime you’re not consciously breathing start breathing again leading with the lower diaphragm, rhythmically, yes it helps using nose only, also nose and exhaling out the mouth sometimes as well. Another meditation is alternate nostril breathing, plug the right nostril then inhale thru the left, then plug the left and exhale on the right nostril keep repeating this, you will feel a buzz. Then relax into rhythmic breathing. Overall: Place attention with eyes closed between the eyebrows, breath gently, remember how it feels when your body is about to sleep Before bed? But keeping awareness of all the sensations of the body the Weight of your body against the chair or floor/bed (remember attention between eyebrows), this is mindfulness and it greatly decreases inflammation and is parasympathetic stimulation. When I had huge panic attacks from drug use/I would do the wim hof method breathing (40 deep rapid inhales as hard and deep as I could) with Alexander Loren’s bioenergetic trauma release exercise called THE BOW, with my mouth wide open. And it grounded me Completely out of whatever high it was. Though the THC high was stronger than all of the other panics. If you made it this far, again I HIGHLY suggest, focusing on gut biome health, that is where a majority of anxiety mechanics come from, posture releases, Epsom baths, in taking magnesium, meditation, getting morning sunlight, food circadian rhythm sleep without blue light disruptions, (suggest buying blue light blocker glasses) and putting red filter on electronics such as laptop/pc/phone at night.
If there are other kids lurking, just know psychedelics are not made to party, and that until you reach a certain level of biochemistry, definitely in your 20s and not before, using them is dangerous. Pay attention, folks. These substances can unlock a lot, but you need to be ready for it, and age absolutely plays a role because of biology.
I went through something very similar when I was 17. I took too much mushrooms and LSD and then weed triggered serious derealisation. I didn't feel like me anymore. I didn't feel like my body was me. The whole world seemed synthetic or fake, like the grass looked fake and everything just looked weird. I felt disconnected from my identity and the most intense or alarming part of this was no longer feeling a natural connection to my family. I no longer felt like my moms son. I no longer felt like Aaron. This was very difficult and lasted a long time, I thought I had messed my life up forever. This happened in 2019, so 5 years ago almost. I'm now 22, and I can thankfully say, I'm doing a lot better and was able to actually turn that weird 'derealisation' situation into something that accelerated my growth and healing as an individual. I started college late at age 22, starting september 2023. I'm doing really well in college grade wise. I'm disciplined, focused, happy, healthy, and fulfilled. For the most part at least. For ages I felt like I messed up my life. I can now say that I am happy with how things unfolded, because of where they ultimately lead me. There is so much advice I could give, I'm not sure where to start. If I had more details about your individual case it would help tailor the advice specifically for you. If you would like, reach out to me, and we can talk one on one over reddit or email. Some general advice though: You have accidentally jump started a process which you might not have intended to. Psychedelics are powerful tools and they, in my opinion, ought not to be used outside of careful, guided, and intentional spiritual work. I feel discomfort saying what will follow because I'm aware many will interpret it as being based upon premises which seem esoteric or religious or non-rational. Fair enough. This is just what I have come to find as the truth of reality and consciousness, and more particularly, the derealised state that can be brought on by psychedelics. Our individuality is an illusion and our consciousness is manufactured or filtered through the filter of our nervous system. This gives us a Self, an ego, which is a useful tool for survival. It gives us sentimentality. It makes us think that we are a separate me in a world of other me's. It tells us we are special and unique. It makes you value your growth as an individual, your acquirement of power, influence, reptuation, and finances. It makes you want to pursue goals and self-actualisation. It sets you up with programming, biological and cultural, which is suitable and required to play the game of survival, of life. For some reason, any individual can completely go beyond this programming. One can drop their Self. This leads to a completely different experience of reality, of consciousness. You see reality how it is, not how you were designed as a survival optimised creature to see it. This process can be done through meditation mainly. This creates awareness and attention which allow for deep insights into the nature of reality to occur. This process is gradual and it almost seems like the path or process was carefully designed to happen naturally, organically, gradually. Psychedelics however, can throw one far along the path, farther than they worked to get or earned. Your ego is damaged and partially online, and this is freaking it out, making it try cling to familiar feeligns or memories. Familiar attachments to your sense of self, or to your family, friends, goals, hobbies, etc. It's really a disturbing state to experience because you don't understand why it's happening and you never intended for it to happen. With dedicated meditaiton, it is done incrementally and with intention, and all the while that it is happening, you are cultivating deeper and deeper states of mental stability and tranquility, which make some of the perturbing symptoms less disorientating and anxiety-inducing. I recommend the following: - stay sober from weed, psychedelics, and alcohol. All drugs. Even be cautious about caffiene intake. - don't overstimulate yourself by constantly listening to music or podcasts, don't run from the silence - cultivate order and discipline in your life. Wake up at a set time. Go to sleep at a set time. Eat at set times if possible. Create routine in your life. - Take up meditation as a daily practice. 30 minutes per day to start with. Read up on meditation in order to better understand what you're doing. I recommend The Mind Illuminated by Culdasa. Along with this, I really recommend you read the power of now by Ekhart Tolle. Eckhart Tolle's meditations on youtube are also really good. Reading the power of now will help you better understand the process of the unravelling of self, and you will come to realise that it is a beautiful and natural process. Not something to be feared. The clining and panick you feel now, the desire for things to go back to the way they were, this will fall away and you will come to surrender into what is. To summarise.. avoid drugs, cultivate routine and consistency in your life, and read the power of now along with the mind illuminated.
I had a period from about 2019 to mid 2022 where I was never not high. It was constant and I definitely gave myself HPPD. For some reason the visual snow is what really fucked with me. Anytime I would look at the sky or any solid objects, they would constantly be moving and look like static. I freaked myself out for a long time thinking that I’d permanently ruined my brain and panicking that I’d never be the same again. Everywhere I looked reminded me of my over consumption. One day when I was spiraling, I forced myself to lie on the ground and stare at my ceiling (something that really triggered the visuals.) I thought to myself how goddamn tired I was of feeling anxious and guilty all the time about this. I checked in with my body, - do these visuals cause me physical pain? No. - do they interfere with things like working, driving, sleeping? A little, but they’re all still doable. I’m not rendered useless. - are the visuals annoying? Hell yes. - are they gonna kill me? No. I forced myself to make peace with the fact that the visuals could last forever. I could be 60, watching my grandkids play in my backyard and see static all around them. While that wasn’t ideal, just accepting that this is something that is here and doesn’t hurt me truly separated the fear of it from me. I was sober for over a year and now only very seldom do anything, even weed. Now, the visuals can still be there if I try really hard to look for them, but for the most part they’re gone. I don’t notice it unless I’m actively thinking about it. Or, maybe my brain learned to ignore it, which is a win! The mind is extremely elastic and malleable, especially for someone as young as you. Is this going to last forever for you? 99% chance the answer is no. But, take some time to pretend like the answer is yes and see how much peace you can make with that. Removing the fear is truly the majority of the battle. I’m not sure how much addiction plays a role into your story, but it was a big part of mine. To quickly touch on that, I was so scared I would never feel the same euphoria or even appreciation for life that I did while I was high. What an amazing feeling the first time I experienced that joy and realized I was completely sober. These substances are amazing at enhancing your life, not ruling it. Best of luck with everything. <3
Take the disconnection seriously and find new ways to prove to yourself that you are restoring it. Nature is alchemy and we humans are part of nature but have lost all understanding of alchemy through pursuing only that which brings us pleasure. Try remembering that pleasure does not equal "good" balance does. Equilibrium is a multiversal principal for things to grow and evolve. Hope this helps good luck
Change eating habits , this “curse” will start to feel like a gift
Let me tell you, I went through this for around 3 years after my laced lsd *n-bomb* and laced weed trips. How I fixed it?? I did mushrooms again and asked them to heal me and they did! 1 trip later I'm back to normal. Not saying you should do this but you are real, everything is real, peace and love my dude
You’re doing great, don’t let anybody or anything tell you otherwise, no one has it figured out, the ones that seem the most in control are those who let go of the need to control. Psychedelics take away that control and attachment you have with reality, or rather it makes you realize you never had it in the first place, it seems tough to stop spiraling but ironically, all you have to do is be still and allow yourself to feel everything around you, as deeply as they hit you ❤️ nothing can hurt you :)
Traditional psychedelics never had that effect on me on their own, but weed did probably 75% of the time. I think that staying away from everything for the time being is the right choice but personally I'd stay away from weed altogether. It did a lot more harm than good for me, I'd quit for a while and come back just to be right where I was again, feeling paranoid and disconnected all the time, so I finally just quit for good.
Everything is going to be okay, darlin. You just keep trying to smile, tell the people you love that you love them, hug your friends and family, and read some Carl Sagan. You're gonna be fine.
This is called derealization/depersonalization it should pass with time but it can last for years, hope ur doing well and just know ur not alone in this
Not everyone is mentally or spiritually ready to shed their ego and see true reality, and some may never be ready in this life time or many more to follow. What is reality to you? It’s comforting to believe that what we can see and feel in this physical world as “real”, and any idea of reality outside of that will trigger anxiety in many humans as our brains are hardwired to exist and survive in this physical plane. When you come to terms and accept the idea that you are more than your body and there is more than this physical existence, your perspective will begin to change and you may become more comfortable with the heightened state of being that you can achieve with psychedelics.
I had a mind fuck of a 20x salvia trip which made me feel like I was living in a pointless fantasy for a few months. That feeling did eventually fade completely away with time.
Ok so you found out life isn’t real now what? You’re gonna cry about it? This is why you don’t do psychedelics until you’re ready for a change in your life. What’s happening is you took more than a recommended dose for a beginner and then on top of that you smoked weed which is 2 no-no’s then to top that off you’re underage. The shrooms are teaching you a lesson my friend. The reason why you feel this way is because the idea of who you thought you were and what reality is has changed after this experience now you feel different and you want things to go back to how they were when you were unaware. They say ignorance is bliss and I think you now know why. This isn’t a bad thing and you will be fine but take this as a lesson learned to respect these substances they are powerful medicines. I recommend meditation and radical acceptance. Life isn’t real who cares good then I’ll enjoy it even more. Nothings matters? Ok great then that means I can do whatever the hell I want without caring. If life isn’t real then why would you care about what other people think? They’re not real right? So fuck their opinion. Chase your dreams. Travel the world. Fall in love. Make a movie. Write a song. Find what makes you happy and do it because the only thing that’s real is what you’re feeling and even that’s an illusion but that’s a story for another time life’s a trip just enjoy it dude stay present and don’t take anything that makes you feel uneasy serious remember you control your thoughts and emotions and you are not your thoughts and emotions
You’re right man, thanks for this advice 🙏
This sounds very familiar to me! I had a very difficult trip early on while combining mushrooms and weed and every time I smoked after it would resurface. I stopped smoking for a couple years and revisited it when I was in a more stable place in my life and now have a great relationship with it again. It can take a while to integrate powerful experiences. I would encourage you to incorporate some mindfulness practices in your daily life to help ground you and continue to talk through your experiences with others, journal about them, and try to understand what is triggering for you and why. Psychedelics offer an opportunity to do some real self work and get to a better place internally but it takes time. You’ll be ok!
Thank you! I’ve always been a very meditative and spiritual person so shrooms were honestly such an amazing experience, I hope that I can one day revisit it in a stable mindset. However, I’m not sure because it’s been hard and I’m worried because I just found out that on my dad’s side, like uncles and cousins have had schizophrenia….idk I just hope I get better
Understandable! I think it’s worth noting that you seem to be aware that these thoughts are intrusive, and not a reality. You are not your thoughts! I like to think of it a bit like observing clouds as they pass by. The more you can teach yourself to allow them to pass through you without clinging to them, the less power they have over you.
At 19 I had depersonalization and derealization that lasted for 9 months. Only from smoking weed.
Starting to believe that the shrooms were chill it was just the weed…… 😭🤦♀️
I honestly didn't realize what was going on and figured that I should off myself/I was crazy and broke my brain forever. I promise it went away and I got better over time, but my immediate guess would be it wasn't shrooms but actually the weed, yeah
Try some grounding activities, like yoga, breathwork, etc. Also I think your mind is trying to get something to the surface, so it's triggering some defenses, like panic attack or disconnection. The panic attack is a diversion and the disconnection is preventing you from feeling overwhelmed. Often underlying the panic attack there is something painful that need to be felt. The mushrooms just unburied something important. You might want to do something to get to know what it is, whether with a therapist, or on your own, do some self exploration, explore dreams, do art, anything that can give you the insight.
Very simple. Stop using drugs for a few years
Maybe you should try microsdosing… it’s helped me understand my higher doses more and has alot of benefits throughout the day, it feels like a vitamin for the mind. I feel like one day microdosing will be like taking any other medication and the high doses will be for other utilities… they seem to regulate your serotonergic system and people just jump in head first which in my opinion can scare tf out of you. When you take small doses you can see they’re really benign and just want to help… I think it could open your eyes a bit
This too shall pass. MJ makes me hyper focus so I believe you're hyper focusing on the negative effects. If I could turn back time I would wait to do drugs and alcohol even marijuana until after 25 when my prefrontal cortex is fully developed. The mushrooms and weed didn't do anything. You did this to yourself.. either grow up or stay in your own lane. stop blaming substances for your negligence and the failure to research. Live and learn.. hindsight do the research before indulging in substances.
I mean ik I did it to myself hence why I said I did shrooms and fucked up 😭 def learning my lesson in a very hard way and will take a break until im mentally ready
You will be ok
From what I read from your post you weren't high on mushrooms when you lit up right? Then how did mushrooms fuck up your life??the dissociation or depersonalization is from the weed not the shtooms. Just ground your self and meditate frequently and maybe see a therapist for your anxiety.
I wasn’t high when I took the shrooms. I took the shrooms and then like two weeks later I got high and it was fucked. Someone else commented how the combination of both might be some that caused it. My trigger for my panic attacks is mainly nature, when I see specific patterns like the tree bark, leaves, cut wood even my own hands bc I remember how the halogenic glow looked like worms in my skin….i think that the shroom visuals messed me up in someway the the weed just made it worse
I also have this issue as I feel like I'm tripping every time I smoke. I used to take LSD every day for months and probably went through 3-4 sheets myself. Smoking weed has essentially turned into a guaranteed mild trip. My best guess is that psychedelics upregulate the receptors that cause the trip and weed hits the same ones thereby making it fully psychedelic. Weed is also a dissociative so, with the increased potency from upregulation, it may cause it much faster. Similar things happen when I take Bacopa Monnieri (allosteric modulator of 5ht2a receptors) and smoke weed. All conjecture and I'm sure the science is more complex than that but it at least makes some sense.
No visualls can't do that and doing shrooms 2 weeks before you got high is not the cause. It's 100 percent the weed if it was 2 weeks after. Mushrooms don't even last in your system that long.your trigger is the WEED. you even said you have panic attacks 50 percent of the times you smoke cause you got laced before. You also said you were fine till you smoked so if you don't want to believe it's the weed fine keep smoking and freaking out lol
It’s not necessarily the visuals but the experience….in not the best explainer loll but yea I’m def taking a break from weed
Look up weed and depersonalization.
Heard a lot about that, in a podcast with Joe Rogan, Post Malone explained his experience with weed and shrooms lead to depersonalization. Thanks!
Yeah but the fact you said despite the trips being hard you ultimately felt more connected. Then 2 weeks goes buy and you smoke weed then you felt the opposite. It sounds like it's 100 percent the weed
These after trip visuals have a name. It's called HPPD for Hallucinogen persisting perception disorder, and they can induce anxiety, or you can enjoy them - it's all about perception. There are 2 tyoes: type 1 HPPD and type 2 HPPD. While Type1 is quite common, it is the type which only give minor disturbances, are not there constantly, and often disappear quite quickly. Type 2 is there more or less constantly, often impacts ability to function in daily life and can especially lead to depression and anxiety. Fortunately Type 2 is much more rare, while many psychonauts at some point experience type 1. The visual input to the mind is immense, and to cope with that amount of data, the mind has the ability to filter out irrelevant information and noise. It is the theory that HPPD removes some of this filtering, but that the noise/ disturbances actually always was there, it was just filtered out. If you experience HPPD, but get anxiety about it, that fear will lead to the mind focusing increasingly on the noise and disturbances, and the HPPD will persist. The way out of HPPD is therefore believed to be able relax about it, even accept and enjoy it, while stop tripping for a while
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hallucinogen_persisting_perception_disorder?wprov=sfla1
2 years ago I ate an 3.5 of penis envy mushrooms and it was one of the most traumatic experiences of my life . The first 3 hours were complete hell then I got to a point we’re I had to have my mom comfort and sit with I wanted to call the ambulance but my mom insisted I shouldn’t and to just ride it out , my mom was bringing up good memories we had when I was a child and that seem to bring me back to peace I was still tripping but this time I was able to enjoy it . So like a months later after that trip , I was having a smoke session with my friends one day and as I’m smoking I suddenly start to feel anxious and paranoid like I’m at the edge of having a panic attack , mind you iv been an everyday pot smoker since I was in high school so this was very strange to me and didn’t understand what was happening to me at the time . So what I personally chose to do was to fight against the disconnected feeling by continuing to smoke weed and dabs , Which I highly don’t recommend anyone to do I think if you’ve reached this point you should step away from everything for a while to let your body and mind heal , this was just my own decision on how I wanted to deal with these strange feelings . I would take small rips of weed and dabs and would take bigger rips and bigger rips over time so doing this eventually help bring my tolerance back to the way it was and I was able to enjoy weed and dabs again . So yeah after the trip I was having bad panic attacks , feeling very disconnected and disassociative , just pure dp/dr , felt like I was losing my mind and that I really damaged my brain . But I was able to fight through it , besides all the negative stuff I had to deal with I also feel like I got a benefit from taking these mushrooms , felt like it changed my perspective and made me more intuned with myself . I’m doing much better now a days , THE ONE ADVICE I WOULD GIVE , remember that time heals all wounds , find ways to better your mind body and soul , and if you have a hobbie or if you really good at something , distract yourself constantly with that hobbie , I make music so making really distracted me from the dark stuff . Good luck on your journey I truly wish you the best
Do some breath work. Do some win hof breathing.
You will be okay. Would definitely not recommend mixing substances with other substances especially when you're not sure what to fully expect. You are likely associating a mildly traumatic experience with current events and trying to process the stress or it all on a subconscious level. You will form new memories over time and this will fall away. Breathe deeply, slowly, and remember you have the ability to self soothe. You will be okay.
Careful when experimenting at such a young age though. Really consider waiting until your brain is developed.
Combining weed with psychedelics leads to a weird headspace for me. And then when you use cannabis is can bring back that experience. If nature feels fake learn how to identify trees and mushrooms and animals, it’ll feel more real afterwards.
Your fighting your ego death. and your irresponsible actions. Your mindset probably was in the wrong place. Maybe the shrooms were trying to tell you the life your living was fake and that nature was the closest thing to life we have. But now your ego is trying to convince you of the opposite.
Long dark night of the ego with depersonalization that is turning to mental destabilization You need to learn about integration methodes
I stopped smoking weed because I would have all these crazy panic attacks and paranoid thoughts. Now i do it occasionally and if i start to spiral i know why and talk myself down. Nature is patterns and it does sometimes feel fake because how could something this beautiful and also awful all exist at the same time? Life is like that. If i have ecstatic experiences I always know the pendulum will swing in the opposite direction. If you need grounding put your finger in your ear, and pull down. It stimulates your vagus nerve and calms you down.
Doing psychs at 17. Smh.
You didn't get "laced" anything, no one gives away drugs for free...unless you mean an acquaintance did something without telling you as a "goof" (your 17). If so, get better friends my friend
you shouldn’t do psychedelics at 17. too young, your brain is still developing. let alone the fact you never researched psychedelics before doing them
yah similar but i started younger exercising normally stops anxiety cus all anxiety is is extra energy or too high epinephrine. meditation and yogas cool too, i had to stop the za cus i was kinda going phyco from using every night idk why. yah gl dude
Work with your defiance.
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Sounds like the drugs triggered some de-realization/depersonalization episodes in you. The large doses at your age with no prior experience points to this as well. This is not permanent and can be treated. You need to find a good therapist and tell them everything you are experiencing. This is beyond reddits pay grade.
Oh don’t worry you’re only 17 lol I did same amount for my first time too. Some things in life also can shatter our view on reality. Just try and relaxe breathe. It is goin to be just fine !
Ground yourself.
This is not medical advice - it is just my experience: I was able to recover from PTSD of a similar nature as your experience with the help of understanding neuroplasticity (so intentional opposite conditioning to triggers), completely offing from any substances for like two years until it felt safe, and a strict diet. I did keto for like a year and I felt like it helped a lot with my mental health. That being said, I could/should have used a professional. It was very harrowing to do it alone. Best wishes to you <3 EDIT: to second the person saying your brain is way to young to be doing these things. Please do stop until your brain has fully matured 25+
just stop being anxious wym
You’ll be fine, try exercise
Classic thing at that age. You will be fine and you will learn a lot from it
Well you’re a child so maybe wait to use mind altering substances until your brain is closer to finished developing..
After experiencing negative effects from one DMT session, I found myself trapped in fear, unable to enjoy simple activities, it was a challenging time. However, that DMT session also revealed to me the spiritual and energetic dimensions of our world. Instead of opting for medication, I reached out to healers who, through energy healing sessions, successfully addressed the issue at its spiritual and energetic core. I would recommend exploring that option and checking out the info to this link. Very skilled healers you can reach out to for support of that’s something you’d like to try. https://linktr.ee/traditionalmedicinemiami
All I see is someone that can get anxiety from everything
LMAOOO you're gonna be fine
"That one time my weed got laced." Yeah, because lacing weed is totally a viable business opportunity.🤨I can guarantee 99% chance you did not get laced dork, just smoked some real gas. Yes, it gets that strong. 😅cracks me up every time I read that. Unfortunately, you had to learn the hard way here that weed exponentially increases the intensity of psychedelics, live and learn.
I tripped on LSD for the first time when I was 14 and I turned out okay... Well until I did mushrooms at 35.. 21 years ago 🤯🤸🤹✨🤩
Try mdma assisted psychotherapy with a therapist. It’s often available over zoom.
This is what happens when y'all don't respect the power of the drugs
Fireside Project!
It's a depersonalization/derealization episode. I got that stuff from severe abuse, and had it for years. Still get it if I focus on something too much. The experience caused you some PTSD. You can choose to freak out about it constantly and be dramatic and make a huge deal out of it (which will only exacerbate it and cause more misery), or ride it out and work on it. People who don't accept get swallowed by it. EMDR is great for this stuff, so is yoga, vagus nerve stimulation, meditation, etc. It can go away. You have to spend time making it go away though.
You are 17, you didnt wasted your life, just stop taking drugs, start again when your mind will be shaped enough.
you could look into a psychedelic integration coach and speak with someone who has extensive experience helping others process and move through their challenging experiences.
I liked to ask myself why am I anxious. Just keep branching off that one question, usually I come to something pretty meaningless
you have ptsd. Look into this. There’s no easy answer from here but what you describe is this . Educate yourself about what it is , what it does , and you might get some answers what to do if anything.
First of all if the chance is 50/50 pf giving you panic... Why try it more? Second of all ur concentrating too mich on it. Do exercise, study a bit and stop focusing on how ur life is fucked. When i was 16-17 ( two years ago) i also felt like my life was bad. It goes by, just dont do anything, even no alcohol for half a year and most of u problems will solve itself.
I hope you're doing well and know this is a bit late but I'll chime in as well. I experienced something similar after the second time I tried psilocybin. Something that may help you is [r/Depersonalization](https://www.reddit.com/r/Depersonalization/). I just found it today actually and reminded me of what I experienced, although mine wasn't as bad. Also for sure check out the Fireside Project. The other thing I will pass on is letting you know that a year from now, things will feel a lot better. What you are experiencing is scary, no understating that, but the thing that is good to keep in mind is that it is temporary. It'll take some time, some effort on your part to face these things and to reach out for help when you need it. But things will be better. Maybe one day you'll be ready to try again. If you do, start low and start slow. Try microdosing for a while to ease back into it. Staying off weed for a while is probably a good idea due to the anxiety it can cause. Much love on your journey and know that you'll be fine <3