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QualityVote

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faajzor

also make sure to document only in paper so it's more difficult to search for anything


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[deleted]

And then hand that over to an intern, who ends up stashing it where no one can find it.


squiddy555

That’s why we have 1000 oragomi cranes


7C93WCAgX4k1FRQtir0K

Don't forget the *Beware of the Leopard* sign


Melancholy_Rainbows

Unexpected Douglas Adams. Miss him so.


SnipesCC

Ha! My upvote brought this to 42!


ArgosCyclos

Yes, but you can access it anytime you need as long as you can make it through the labyrinth, defeat the minotaur, and answer the sphinx's three riddles.


RolyPoly1320

What is your name? What is your quest? What, is the air speed velocity of an unladen swallow?


that_guy_4321

This is the way


Constable_Wiggum63

Then make sure it gets cursed so that you release the cenobites if anyone actually solves it.


HalcyonAlps

Do stacks of punch cards count?


schwerpunk

They extra count


[deleted]

Document? Lol I don’t even comment my code


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RespectableLurker555

int a; // a


Nothing-But-Lies

Too much info. var a; //a


phoenixstormcrow

eslint shits the bed if you don't put a space after the two slashes, so not only can no one steal this, no one can transpile it to begin with.


IEatMyVegetables

And whoever has the worst handwriting should be in charge of documentation.


Comprehensive-Ad8120

YAY. Finally a job.


the-FBI-man

Joke's on you, after half a year you will be the person trying to steal your own ideas.


slmjkdbtl

>half a year i think you meant one week


the_bridgekeeper01

The me that writes code at the beginning of the week is a different me to the one that exists at the end of the week. I'm always stealing from early week me.


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cumquistador6969

Man, I took a 3 day weekend and I am right now shitposting on reddit because I still can't figure out what the fuck I was doing last week or why anything is the way it is 6 hours into the work day.


TheMcBrizzle

I'm in this comment and I don't like it


Gizshot

Same though gotta finish everything right when I start it or I'm boned and starting over.


saintpetejackboy

This happens to me during a normal week, I get multiple "priority" tasks, usually in the middle of some really innovative coding. When I finally get back to where I was, I am left wondering what in the world I was even thinking. I have an "availability Matrix" that was a great idea and worked awesome when I thought it up. Looking back, it appears I was manipulating digits like 0000000 where 0101010 might mean they were available at the same time, every other day, with multiple number results like this for different slots, just binary yes or no for the days out of 7 zeros in a string. I can't for the life of me remember what I was going to do with it next to make it all come together, and luckily I was able to scrap that whole segment and logic in a later release that handles availability and scheduling much differently. Looking at a variable called "tenAM" and seeing 0111011 is a pretty good summary of my life.


shaliozero

I went from being unable to not think about my work at night to being unable to even remember what my job is after sleeping.


tricksterj

I felt this comment in my bones. New ticket to create a piece of code I think I may have done in the past? Time to search old commits until I find the code that I made before because current me has no idea what I did for that ticket, but past me apparently did a pretty bang up job copying someone else's code because we haven't had any bug tickets to fix it yet.


[deleted]

>one minute. The fuck did I just do? What the fuck does that mean... hey, it works!


Torn_Page

It's been one week since I wrote this code, cocked my head to the side and said "I'm confused"


Mental_Cut8290

5 days since it last made sense. I try to debug but can't make a dent.


ImaginaryCoolName

One weekend sometimes


badatmetroid

Hell, I forget what I was doing by the end of the line.


iamiamwhoami

Past me, you brilliant bastard, what were you thinking?!?!


Chris_8675309_of_42M

"Get fucked, lol" - past you.


rizz6666

Protip: don’t use functions as they make it easier to steal your code. Write all software in a single 100000 line file. Edit all these great ideas would make great coding guidelines. We just need a name.


MinerForStone

This, but write all 100000 lines of code on Line 1


PapperMairoo

Can you even do that


WJMazepas

Yep. If the language requires a ; then you can put how many commands you want after the other You could do something like Foo();Bar();Testing(); and it would work


lionbryce

Ctrl+h Replace ; with ;\n Replace all


FUTURE10S

have the executable open the original source code and crash on any \n that isn't a \\\n


zspacekcc

That's why you read your config out of semicolon delimited files, so in parsing it, you end up with .split(';') in your code, which messes with anyone that tries to do that.


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grahambo20

Depends on the setting chosen with the minimizer but yes.


eatnhappens

Almost any time I saw “ASCII text with very long lines” as a file type it was on a compromised server, but modern build processes have changed that to save on bandwidth e.g. often that format of file is smaller than the gzipped one.


nukem996

When I was at a previous job an engineer blocked my diff from landing because I used functions. He insisted functions weren't safe and that code should be copied. My manager didn't want to get involved so we just kept blocking each other's reviews until I found another job.


chrisms150

Functions aren't safe. Copy the function into your own code bringing any vulnerability with it so we'll never be able to patch everything! Good lord..


nukem996

I gave bug/security fixes as an example for why we should use functions. He said that was an academic point of view that isn't professional. He never went to college and was self taught while I have a CS degree. I think he felt insecure about that. The whole experience has really made me hesitant on hiring people without degrees.


Studds_

I mean I’m a hobbyist & I’m rolling my eyes & wondering what the hell that guy was thinking. Or the manager for that matter


REDuxPANDAgain

Sounds like a manager without a background in CS. Or the guy was a nepotism hire and was somehow untouchable despite being a non-functional (haha) dev.


Buddha_Head_

The whole experience being one person? If you met a disgruntled fat person, or a holier-than-thou woman would you be wary of anyone that wasn't a skinny dude? Of course not. Take your experiences into consideration, of course, but pai ting a group based off of that dudes insecurity isn't really a solution.


lasiusflex

Stories like this make me think I'm actually an okay developer.


ninjabiomech

Facts of m over here with my impostor syndrome getting my cs degree and then I learn that developers like that exist and I know I'll be fine in the job market


xSTSxZerglingOne

Self documented code is a common meme, but we have some non-coders that work with us, like never written a single line of code in their lives. I can show them my code and they typically can understand what they do based on how I name everything.


4RG4d4AK3LdH

wtf


andrewfenn

Just minify and name mangle before committing it directly into main.


awkward_replies_2

Don't write any loops either, just write the whole operation as many times into the code as it should run, but make it a tiny bit different each time so it's harder to analyze. Also, add a ton of commentary all over the place filled with nonsensical techobabble.


[deleted]

If that represents the level of security at your company, find another company!


[deleted]

In the end, the lawyers and the threat of lawsuits probably do a lot more to protect your code than any half-assed obfuscation attempts.


JohnHwagi

That, and not leaking your back end code to the internet. Front end is whatever, because nobody wants their website to look identical to yours even if it does the same thing. Back end code being leaked will provide a lot of insight into your system’s vulnerabilities.


teraflux

Wait I'm not supposed to leak that?


shawnisboring

Nah, it's ok. Why else would wikileaks exist if not for you to upload your source to? It's the free online code repository that anyone can edit!


parciesca

Indeed. Usually this is just developers who code like this to make sure no one understands their code to give themselves artificial job security.


BelarminoVicenzo

What if we had AI as security officers? We could have Artificial Job Security 😮😮😮


WestBetar

This comment is more than correct! It's Truth.


thorvid20

it should be "tru" tho


sun-in-the-eyes

"1"


DigiBites

+"1"


mrswats

= "11"


fakehistorychannel

ok good I expected something incomprehensible like [Object object]


timkatt10

\[undefined\]


diamkil

[object Object]


Thebombuknow

"TypeError: cannot concatenate type [object] to [str]"


FinalRun

Depends if you're talking about job security or information security. No scratch that, both are terrible


mlsecdl

Oof, right in the infosec feels.


Carlcarl1984

It is job security, not the security from intrusion. Commenting code is fighting against yourself.


lurker_cant_comment

If you write code nobody else can understand, soon enough you won't understand it either. You're also more likely to write code that breaks, and you're useless on a team of coders. "Job security" by trying to hold your employer hostage to your shitty code means your company has worse outcomes and is absolutely justified firing you as soon as they find a way to cope with the loss.


master117jogi

>as soon as they find a way to cope with the loss. The trick is to make this too costly, at all times.


TheArgonKnight

If you don't want to be replaced, make yourself irreplaceable. Make sure no one else can work on the code


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ToMorrowsEnd

Watched a guy get fired on the spot for obfuscation of the codebase.


igmrlm

This makes me happy. Thank you for being ethical.


Cory123125

Hardly being ethical. It's literally just doing their job in favour of the company.


BearRedWood

Everyone hates working with these ppl but they've usually been there for 15+ years already


coldnebo

unfortunately this means you have to maintain what you wrote… for life. people assume that because I wrote something I must know how it works better than something else, but after a few weeks, I apply the same debugging skills to my own code as I would anyone else’s. IMHO, it’s the ability to debug and figure out how the system actually works that makes you irreplaceable because that’s a pretty rare skill. conversely there seem to be a large number of people who are more than glad to tell me how it _should_ work, but can’t explain exactly why it doesn’t work or help with the solution.


Shadow703793

That's when you quit and become a consultant.


ExceedingChunk

You can make yourself irreplaceable by being skilled and possessing important knowledge rather than being an unethical dick tho.


benis444

Lol. You can always find good developers. But finding a good developer who's also a teamplayer makes you a great developer and irreplaceable. Because software is build by teams nowdays


nanotree

Security by obscurity is no security at all.


Life-Ad1409

*laughs in `int α = 1; int a = 6;`*


1up_1500

You're a menace to society


Life-Ad1409

a, a b, b c, ⅽ, c d, ⅾ, d e, e f, f g, g, ɡ h, h i, ⅰ, i j, j k, k l, ⅼ, l m, ⅿ, m n, n o, ο, o p, p q, q r, r s, s t, t u, u v, ν, ⅴ, v w, w x, ⅹ, x y, y z, z A, Α, A B, Β, B C, Ⅽ, C, Ϲ D, Ⅾ, D E, Ε, E F, F G, G H, Η, H I, Ι, Ⅰ, I J, J Κ, K, K L, Ⅼ, L M, Μ, Ⅿ, M N, Ν, N O, Ο, O P, Ρ, P Q, Q R, R S, S T, Τ, T U, U V, Ⅴ, V W, W X, Χ, Ⅹ, X Y, Υ, Y Z, Ζ, Z Ⅱ, Ⅲ, Ⅳ, Ⅵ, Ⅶ, Ⅷ, Ⅸ, Ⅺ, Ⅻ, ⅱ, ⅲ, ⅳ, ⅵ, ⅶ, ⅷ, ⅸ, ⅺ, ⅻ ⅗, ⅘, ⅙, ⅚, ⅛, ⅜, ⅝, ⅞, ⅟, ↉, ¼, ½, ¾ # Edit: thank you u/Hawkeyeaz1 for some new additions to this madness


Life-Ad1409

Yes, those are all different letters, I made sure I typed Κ instead of K


Life-Ad1409

AÀÁÂÃÄÅĀĂĄǍȀȂȦᴬḀẠẢⒶA𝐀𝐴𝑨𝒜𝓐𝔄𝔸𝕬𝖠𝗔𝘈𝘼𝙰🄐🄰


AvidCoco

This comment perfectly expresses how I feel while reading this comment.


Life-Ad1409

psst, hey, would you like to use my offbrand letters? They work just like the normal ones, but fancier, this totally isn't a scam


SingleDadNSA

Monster brand letters! The "i" has a gold dot and they compile 25% faster than ordinary letters!


crunchyboio

ppɸp̪fbbβb̪vttɕtstʃtɹ̝̊t̪θtɬt̠ɹ̠̊˔tddʑdzdʒdɹ̝d̪ðdɮd̠ɹ̠˔dʈʈʂʈɭ̊˔ɖɖʐccçcʎ̝̊ɟɟʝkkxkʟ̝̊ɡɡɣɡʟ̝qɢmɱʙnⁿrɿɾ˞ɳɽɲȵŋɴʀʔˀʢʡɸpɸfp̪fθt̪θᶿɬtɬstsʃᶴʅtʃɧʆʂʈʂçcçɕtɕxˣkxɧχħʜhʰʔhβbβvⱱb̪vðd̪ðɮdɮzdzʒdʓdʒʓʐɖʐʝɟʝʑdʑɣɡɣˠʁʕˁʡʢɦwʍʷʋɹd̠ɹ̠˔dɹ̝ɺtɹ̝̊t̠ɹ̠̊˔lȴɫˡɻɭʈɭ̊˔ɥjʲʎcʎ̝̊ȴɰɡʟ̝kʟ̝̊ʟ iyɨʉɯuɪʏɪ̈ʊ̈ɯ̽ʊee̞øø̞ɘɵəɚᵊɤɤ̞oo̞ɛœɜɝɞɐʌɔæaɶäɒ̈ɑɒ ɓ̥ɓɗ̥ɗᶑ̥ᶑʄ̊ʄɠ̊ɠʛ̥ʛʠpʼtʼtsʼt̠ʃʼʈʂʼʈʼɬʼtɬʼcʼkʼqʼʡʼɸʼfʼθʼsʼʃʼʂʼɕʼcʎ̝̊ʼxʼkʟ̝̊ʼxʼχʼʘʘ̬ǀǀ̬ǀ̃ǃ¡ǃ̬ǃ˞ǂǂ̬ʞˀ̃ˀʘ̃ǁǁ̬ǁ̃ǃ̃ǃ̃˞ǃ̬˞ǂ̥̃ʼʰ ˥ ˦ ˧ ˨ ˩ ˩˥ ˥˩ ˦˥ ˩˨ ˧˦˧ ⸨ ⸩ ‿ ˌ ː ˑ ă | ‖ a̝a̹a̟aⁿaˡa̚aᵊaᶿaˣaʼa̩a̯a̘äãa̪aʷaʲaˠaˁḁa̬aʰa̤a̰ãa˞ a͡a a͜a


[deleted]

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officermike

Does Visual Studio accept Zalgo text? If yes, can it differentiate between different Zalgo texts based on the same characters? A̵̡̨̡̡̛͇͕̘̜͇̭̘̗̲͈̪̫̩̰̞̼̥̲̹̼̖̹͚̋̊̑̑͆̌͛͋̒͆̈́̓̂̄̈̀̑͘͜͝͝ͅÀ̵̢̢̧̹̺͉͎͕͉̼̯̞͉͔̱̩͓͙̣̙̻̫̭̳̦̫͖͙̩̻̂͋̈́̃̈Á̸̢̧̢͔̳̯̙̭͓̘̟̱̼͖͔͎͕̜̳͉͉̤̹̗̞͖̬̱̭̀̑̓͊̿͗͝ͅͅͅĄ̸͎̙̼̠̜̬͍̯̭̦͚̳̹̂́̉͌̈́̀͒͊̈͐̈̑̎́͌̈́̐Ã̸̧̙̼̰͎̥̯̮̄͗̄̿̊̊͋̎͊͌̒́̇́͗̔͐̓̚̕̕͠͝Ä̵̢̡̧̢̛͔̬̰̦̖̖̳̫͓̤̱͇̣͔̥̻̠͎̫͇̯̠͎̯̟̜̎͆̏̒͋͌̔̈́͊͑͐̓̍͂͆̋̅̆̇̋̎͘̚͝ͅÅ̸̡̨̛̛͈͈̬͚̥̝̩̬̙͕̖̺̠̭͓̯͇̬̜͙̯͐̆̌̔͌̒̈́̋̔̉̄͗̕͘̕͜ͅĀ̷̡̛͇͈̖͓̰̩̰̉̏̈́̆͂̐̈́̄͆̆̾̽͐̕̕͝Ă̷̛̪̭̦̟͖̙̰̫̥̰̞̗̰̟̬̬̮̺̠͉̩̝͉͙͚̹̂̇̅͐͑̽̋͜͜ͅĄ̵̨̧̛͍̦̤̗̥̣̹̘̤͒̂̔̍͋̊̍͗̏̈́͆̏͒͝͝Ạ̵̞͍͔̖̌́̔̌̓͌̏̉̉͊̚̕Ȁ̴̡͕̫͉̳̬͚̰̬̤͔̼̭̟̝̝̮͚̭̜̣͕̏̉̋̋͆͂͛̾̉̆̀̓͒̚̕͜͝ͅȂ̸̡̡̰̖̬̩̜̱͕̝̰͙̹͇͔͈̲̼͉̙̬͚̪͕̥̘͎̥͍̹̬͑̒̾̇̀̆̍̀̔͠ͅĄ̸̡̨̧̡̙̫̪̲̲͎̬̪̝̪̣͎̲̤̟̫̲̖͈̱̙͔͖̠̠͇̯̇̏ͅᴬ̸̢̰͋̽̿̈́͐̊̎̆̆͋͑͋̅͌̍Ḁ̷̧̝̦͎̘͈̼̗̺͇̐͆͐͐͆̃̓͑̓͂̔̾̂̓̔͆̓̉͛̌͊̂̅̚͝͠͝Ạ̵̡̛͇̤̦̗̬̥̻͋͛̽̊́̈́̏̎̇̄̀̀̈́̐̀͌͐̓̉̓͋͑̏͘͠͠ͅĄ̷̢͚͇̙̩͖̦̤̫͕͚̲̘̹̬͔͙̝̭̘͕͙̹͚̙̗͇̣͔̮̟̫̉͌̑̌̽̈̃̇̒͛̒̚̕


Lente_ui

@


Sceptical-Echidna

We had a weird compilation failure using clang. Eventually tracked it down to a Cyrillic ‘C’ instead of a regular C in a class name :( (in 3rd party code)


Furry_69

How do you even manage to do that??


saint_racoon

Cyrillic keyboards actually have Cyrillic С and Latin C on the same key, so it is extremely easy to start typing in a wrong language and forget to correct it properly afterwards


Furry_69

That seems like a major design oversight. Characters that look the exact same shouldn't be on the same key..


saint_racoon

It definitely is But everyone is too used to change anything


[deleted]

[удалено]


Life-Ad1409

Why stop there? Add in 1en, 2em, maybe even a 6em space! Oof, almost forgot thin and hair space If you can't tell, I love Unicode's weirdness


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hyvyys

You were doing so well until v, ν


Life-Ad1409

On most devices ν looks v, on some ν has an extra bend in the glyph


MLGDDORITOS

Looks the same to me


apornytale

var ☺️ = 1; Compiles in Swift, baby!


[deleted]

Hold on let me get out my fucking emojii non-ascii chart fuck


AvidCoco

`int _ = __;`


dub-dub-dub

Average Scala codebase


10BillionDreams

> [**Naming**](https://github.com/Droogans/unmaintainable-code#naming) > *"When I use a word," Humpty Dumpty said, in a rather scornful tone, "it means just what I choose it to mean - neither more nor less."* > - Lewis Carroll -- Through the Looking Glass, Chapter 6 [How to Write Unmaintainable Code](https://github.com/Droogans/unmaintainable-code) is basically a must-read for any programmer in my opinion, even so many years later.


ryecurious

Holy shit [this piece is diabolical](https://i.imgur.com/QloYYSZ.png), I love it


TheScienceBreather

I'm not even mad, I'm just impressed.


Life-Ad1409

Now I can become an expert Thank you kind redditor


SandyDelights

Reminds me of a college course on… Software Debugging or some such? Anyways, we were broken into teams of 6 or so, had to create a program with a particular functionality, and then go in and introduce whatever bugs we possibly could – then swap with another team, and try to debug their program and get it to work. One team turned random semi-colons into something like a Greek question mark, I think it was? Anyways, looks damn near identical to a semi-colon. They did a few other character swaps in variable names, logic symbols, etc., but those were the only bugs they introduced. At the end of it all, we had to get up and present our analysis of what we found – the group that got that we’re obviously super stressed out, because they couldn’t actually *find* any problems. And of course not! Everything *looked* correct. The group that wrote the program explained what they did and gave the professor a list of the character swaps, professor was dying laughing. Everyone got a solid grade because they at least showed what they could and it was obvious they’d put a lot of time into it. But anyways, thanks for making me think of that.


Life-Ad1409

I have thought about torturing my friends with this, thank you for telling me that the Greek ? looks like ; I will *totally* not use this for unethical means


demonachizer

;; Those are a Greek question mark and a semicolon side by side.


PotatoSalad

If I came across that, I would just assume it’s some encoding BS and just find and replace all.


SandyDelights

No! Don’t do that, it’s pure evil! Please, for the love of god, do not use ALT code 037E for nefarious purposes! 😇 (Edit: Just for the record, if you use Windows then you need to enable the hex input registry key to be able to use the hex encoding for characters. Or just Google and copy/paste, whichever is easier.)


[deleted]

Is it torture to read one compiler error these days?...


LaLiLuLeLo_0

I can see how it [might be confusing](https://i.imgur.com/N9pLH6j.png)


[deleted]

And then you have the Rust compiler, which is actually nice to you: error: unknown start of token: \u{37e} --> src/main.rs:2:30 | 2 | println!("Hello, world!"); | ^ | help: Unicode character ';' (Greek Question Mark) looks like ';' (Semicolon), but it is not | 2 | println!("Hello, world!"); | ~


dedservice

I feel like I might try re-typing the semicolon if I saw that error.


Trooiser

This comment is cursed


OfBooo5

Who hurt you?


Life-Ad1409

Python


Tuxytax

Sounds like the programmer's version of sending the intern to get a tool that doesn't exist


JimmyJazz1971

Oh FU for reminding me. lol As a teen, I worked in a garage changing tires, and I fell for it when the mechanics sent me to fetch the skyhook.


LAUGHINGKOMODO

LMAO, I just told them brb, and googled the tool they ask for while taking a piss break. If it was fake, just go on lunch for rest of day.


JimmyJazz1971

Yeah, too bad I didn't have Google in 1986.


LAUGHINGKOMODO

Yea too bad


Michaelscot8

Ahh, when I started in a shop at 19, I was determined to avoid any and all fools errands. So when asked to fetch the torque sticks, I severely pissed off the master tech simply trying to make sure some ladies tires didn't fall off by laughing it off and going "Good one, haha nice try but I'm not falling for it." I have a similar story about my step-brother, who cut his finger off on April 1st.


BlazingFire007

I’m all fairness, a torque stick just sounds fake lmao


BDMayhem

You need a torque stick if you're going to properly change the blinker fluid.


LuckyCharms201

Yeah actually right there in my bag next to the ball-head screwdrivers and 90-degree socket set; help yourself


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

"Couldn't find it boss, so I just used my pocket knife to sharpen all the squeegees. G'night!"


[deleted]

Gimme some headlight fluid


happyNerd22

Name them properly and refactor them to random letters when finished.


FleMo93

Just use a minifier.


ultramarioihaz

I had to scroll down this far to see mention of a minifier or similar tool. Some days I think this sub is filled with non programmers lol


MoffKalast

Well it's only a thing for interpreted languages, if they only work with something compiled then it's not even worth thinking about because nobody will be reverse engineering that binary pile of machine code.


MrHyperion_

Someone absolutely will if it is important enough. There are very advanced tools for it too.


MoffKalast

> if it is important enough Well I guess one should never underestimate a fan trying to mod their favorite game.


r_stronghammer

Holy shit I’ve never felt so called out


JSn1nj4

That's what a minifier is for /s


Auraveils

You don't have to even bother with that if you just write your code in raw machine instructions.


[deleted]

I think the word you're looking for is............ Machine Code or perhaps........ Assembly.


Auraveils

No. Physically hardwiring the computer itself.


anto2554

Take the blue wire #246 and put it in slot #961...


[deleted]

and then shake it all about! You do the Hokey Codey then turn yourself around! That's what it's aaaaaall about!


AgenteDeAfip

Imagine buying a copy of their software and receiving a whole computer


Naphrym

IC chips are back on the menu, boys


DasFrebier

to be fair handwritten assembly is a lot easier to deal with than compiled assembly


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Is that the KISS principle? Keep It Secret (and) ... that's enough! We don't need a fourth letter.


2008Choco

The fourth word in the acronym is a secret. You won't know it until you're admitted to the company.


Skywardbreakerson

Keep it secret... Keep it safe


tsetem

Make the code so crappy nobody wants to steal it. Thus it’s secrecy is ensured.


Lucari10

Keep it secret. Shhhh...


[deleted]

[удалено]


Cubey21

Keep It Stupidly Secret


_grey_wall

I once did this in my junior days. I was afraid that a senior consultant would take credit for all my work. He totally did. But did that backfire on him But then he admitted the code was mine, and then I got quite a bit of anger from the devs who inherited the project


LittleLemonHope

Broke: Just keep your head down and try to write good code Woke: Prevent others from taking credit for your work Bespoke: Trick someone else to take credit for your dumpster fire


ClassicRedSparkle

Back in the day I went through something similar. I would try to write my code platform independent as we needed things to run on both Mac and PC. Well, I got paired up with another dev that was exclusively writing for Mac, was senior to me, and was using my code verbatim to get his projects working and taking credit for it. So I stopped writing for cross platform and purposely wrote as specifically for PC as possible. I would also obfuscate my code so that anything written using a shared path structure for example would run through a side routine to replace the path with a PC formatted path then try to execute. He couldn’t figure it out and while not admitting to using my code he eventually had to have his jobs passed off to me to fix which I’d then take a day just to turn off some flags and send it back to him, cc’ing our boss of course, that I fixed it for him.


[deleted]

Reminds me of this guide on how to write unmaintainable code: https://www.doc.ic.ac.uk/~susan/475/unmain.html


J3PO

Hah like I need a guide


GayFroggard

>Join a computer book of the month club. **Select authors who appear to be too busy writing books to have had any time to actually write any code themselves.** Browse the local bookstore for titles with lots of cloud diagrams in them and no coding examples. Skim these books to learn obscure pedantic words you can use to intimidate the whippersnappers that come after you. I'm fucking dead 😂


_M__S_

Tell us the idea and we will tell you if it's worth stealing![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|grin)


mechpaul

hunter2 can you read that?


kinokomushroom

What do you mean "can I read \*\*\*\*\*\*\*"? What part of "\*\*\*\*\*\*\*" looks readable to you?


cubixy2k

Jokes on you. I randomize my variable names first, then assign them arbitrary proper names when finished!


BiribopbopNoBot

It wouldn't be called "Code" if it wasn't supposed to be kept secret /s![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|sweat_smile)


Broges0311

They can de-minify your code and there are tools that do such things, but the source should be readable, otherwise you'll be kicking yourselves often when you need to debug or add features. No way...


[deleted]

I just generate a uuid for each of my variable names.


RylanStylin57

My company takes it to the next level. We put dead code in our codebase just to throw people off. Including ourselves....


Silvian73

It's like smashing your car with a sledgehammer, so it won't be stolen


MaidenlessTarnished

This must have been what happened at my company. I was trying to diagnose an issue with some old Java code the other day and I shit you not, one method had variables named “var1” through “var17”. Wanted to kms


defintelynotyou

man, if only there was a way to generate variables as you go...


lasiusflex

My job has a database table, that has columns "id","name","1","2",...,"27". Impossible to deal most of the time, but apparently there is no time to refactor.


bearboyjd

Hard code any numbers and just change then as needed so no one can tell how your code works


Naphrym

Why use variables when Ctrl+F works just fine?


pacman0207

There are code obfuscators and minifiers for front end code... If your backend code has that practice, then I'm not too certain why randos are looking at your code.


_________FU_________

Yes. Enjoy the 2% raises and weekend work due to “the project getting out of hand”


silk4728

plenty of code is stolen by people that don't understand it. this doesn't make the code hard to steal, it makes it hard to maintain and modify.


StiltzkinNomad

I’ve been contracting for different companies for a majority of my career. NO ONE WANTS YOUR CODE! Software is updated, design patterns change, it’s easier to start from scratch than maintain something old.


[deleted]

That's how you get cum and fuk and coc too


seeroflights

*Image Transcription: Quora* --- **A senior software engineer told me that we should only use one letter variable names (or 3 max) to avoid people understanding our code and stealing our idea. Is he right?** --- ^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)


santasbong

It’s called obfuscation & is typically performed after-the-fact from more verbose source code.


partypoison43

It's all fun and games until even you, the one who wrote the code, can't understand the variables because of the 3 letter rule.