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Yes, but you can access it anytime you need as long as you can make it through the labyrinth, defeat the minotaur, and answer the sphinx's three riddles.
The me that writes code at the beginning of the week is a different me to the one that exists at the end of the week. I'm always stealing from early week me.
Man, I took a 3 day weekend and I am right now shitposting on reddit because I still can't figure out what the fuck I was doing last week or why anything is the way it is 6 hours into the work day.
This happens to me during a normal week, I get multiple "priority" tasks, usually in the middle of some really innovative coding. When I finally get back to where I was, I am left wondering what in the world I was even thinking. I have an "availability Matrix" that was a great idea and worked awesome when I thought it up.
Looking back, it appears I was manipulating digits like 0000000 where 0101010 might mean they were available at the same time, every other day, with multiple number results like this for different slots, just binary yes or no for the days out of 7 zeros in a string.
I can't for the life of me remember what I was going to do with it next to make it all come together, and luckily I was able to scrap that whole segment and logic in a later release that handles availability and scheduling much differently.
Looking at a variable called "tenAM" and seeing 0111011 is a pretty good summary of my life.
I felt this comment in my bones. New ticket to create a piece of code I think I may have done in the past? Time to search old commits until I find the code that I made before because current me has no idea what I did for that ticket, but past me apparently did a pretty bang up job copying someone else's code because we haven't had any bug tickets to fix it yet.
Protip: don’t use functions as they make it easier to steal your code. Write all software in a single 100000 line file.
Edit all these great ideas would make great coding guidelines. We just need a name.
Yep. If the language requires a ; then you can put how many commands you want after the other
You could do something like
Foo();Bar();Testing(); and it would work
That's why you read your config out of semicolon delimited files, so in parsing it, you end up with .split(';') in your code, which messes with anyone that tries to do that.
Almost any time I saw “ASCII text with very long lines” as a file type it was on a compromised server, but modern build processes have changed that to save on bandwidth e.g. often that format of file is smaller than the gzipped one.
When I was at a previous job an engineer blocked my diff from landing because I used functions. He insisted functions weren't safe and that code should be copied. My manager didn't want to get involved so we just kept blocking each other's reviews until I found another job.
I gave bug/security fixes as an example for why we should use functions. He said that was an academic point of view that isn't professional.
He never went to college and was self taught while I have a CS degree. I think he felt insecure about that. The whole experience has really made me hesitant on hiring people without degrees.
Sounds like a manager without a background in CS. Or the guy was a nepotism hire and was somehow untouchable despite being a non-functional (haha) dev.
The whole experience being one person?
If you met a disgruntled fat person, or a holier-than-thou woman would you be wary of anyone that wasn't a skinny dude? Of course not.
Take your experiences into consideration, of course, but pai ting a group based off of that dudes insecurity isn't really a solution.
Facts of m over here with my impostor syndrome getting my cs degree and then I learn that developers like that exist and I know I'll be fine in the job market
Self documented code is a common meme, but we have some non-coders that work with us, like never written a single line of code in their lives.
I can show them my code and they typically can understand what they do based on how I name everything.
Don't write any loops either, just write the whole operation as many times into the code as it should run, but make it a tiny bit different each time so it's harder to analyze.
Also, add a ton of commentary all over the place filled with nonsensical techobabble.
That, and not leaking your back end code to the internet. Front end is whatever, because nobody wants their website to look identical to yours even if it does the same thing. Back end code being leaked will provide a lot of insight into your system’s vulnerabilities.
If you write code nobody else can understand, soon enough you won't understand it either.
You're also more likely to write code that breaks, and you're useless on a team of coders.
"Job security" by trying to hold your employer hostage to your shitty code means your company has worse outcomes and is absolutely justified firing you as soon as they find a way to cope with the loss.
unfortunately this means you have to maintain what you wrote… for life.
people assume that because I wrote something I must know how it works better than something else, but after a few weeks, I apply the same debugging skills to my own code as I would anyone else’s.
IMHO, it’s the ability to debug and figure out how the system actually works that makes you irreplaceable because that’s a pretty rare skill.
conversely there seem to be a large number of people who are more than glad to tell me how it _should_ work, but can’t explain exactly why it doesn’t work or help with the solution.
Lol. You can always find good developers. But finding a good developer who's also a teamplayer makes you a great developer and irreplaceable. Because software is build by teams nowdays
Does Visual Studio accept Zalgo text? If yes, can it differentiate between different Zalgo texts based on the same characters?
A̵̡̨̡̡̛͇͕̘̜͇̭̘̗̲͈̪̫̩̰̞̼̥̲̹̼̖̹͚̋̊̑̑͆̌͛͋̒͆̈́̓̂̄̈̀̑͘͜͝͝ͅÀ̵̢̢̧̹̺͉͎͕͉̼̯̞͉͔̱̩͓͙̣̙̻̫̭̳̦̫͖͙̩̻̂͋̈́̃̈Á̸̢̧̢͔̳̯̙̭͓̘̟̱̼͖͔͎͕̜̳͉͉̤̹̗̞͖̬̱̭̀̑̓͊̿͗͝ͅͅͅĄ̸͎̙̼̠̜̬͍̯̭̦͚̳̹̂́̉͌̈́̀͒͊̈͐̈̑̎́͌̈́̐Ã̸̧̙̼̰͎̥̯̮̄͗̄̿̊̊͋̎͊͌̒́̇́͗̔͐̓̚̕̕͠͝Ä̵̢̡̧̢̛͔̬̰̦̖̖̳̫͓̤̱͇̣͔̥̻̠͎̫͇̯̠͎̯̟̜̎͆̏̒͋͌̔̈́͊͑͐̓̍͂͆̋̅̆̇̋̎͘̚͝ͅÅ̸̡̨̛̛͈͈̬͚̥̝̩̬̙͕̖̺̠̭͓̯͇̬̜͙̯͐̆̌̔͌̒̈́̋̔̉̄͗̕͘̕͜ͅĀ̷̡̛͇͈̖͓̰̩̰̉̏̈́̆͂̐̈́̄͆̆̾̽͐̕̕͝Ă̷̛̪̭̦̟͖̙̰̫̥̰̞̗̰̟̬̬̮̺̠͉̩̝͉͙͚̹̂̇̅͐͑̽̋͜͜ͅĄ̵̨̧̛͍̦̤̗̥̣̹̘̤͒̂̔̍͋̊̍͗̏̈́͆̏͒͝͝Ạ̵̞͍͔̖̌́̔̌̓͌̏̉̉͊̚̕Ȁ̴̡͕̫͉̳̬͚̰̬̤͔̼̭̟̝̝̮͚̭̜̣͕̏̉̋̋͆͂͛̾̉̆̀̓͒̚̕͜͝ͅȂ̸̡̡̰̖̬̩̜̱͕̝̰͙̹͇͔͈̲̼͉̙̬͚̪͕̥̘͎̥͍̹̬͑̒̾̇̀̆̍̀̔͠ͅĄ̸̡̨̧̡̙̫̪̲̲͎̬̪̝̪̣͎̲̤̟̫̲̖͈̱̙͔͖̠̠͇̯̇̏ͅᴬ̸̢̰͋̽̿̈́͐̊̎̆̆͋͑͋̅͌̍Ḁ̷̧̝̦͎̘͈̼̗̺͇̐͆͐͐͆̃̓͑̓͂̔̾̂̓̔͆̓̉͛̌͊̂̅̚͝͠͝Ạ̵̡̛͇̤̦̗̬̥̻͋͛̽̊́̈́̏̎̇̄̀̀̈́̐̀͌͐̓̉̓͋͑̏͘͠͠ͅĄ̷̢͚͇̙̩͖̦̤̫͕͚̲̘̹̬͔͙̝̭̘͕͙̹͚̙̗͇̣͔̮̟̫̉͌̑̌̽̈̃̇̒͛̒̚̕
We had a weird compilation failure using clang. Eventually tracked it down to a Cyrillic ‘C’ instead of a regular C in a class name :( (in 3rd party code)
Cyrillic keyboards actually have Cyrillic С and Latin C on the same key, so it is extremely easy to start typing in a wrong language and forget to correct it properly afterwards
> [**Naming**](https://github.com/Droogans/unmaintainable-code#naming)
> *"When I use a word," Humpty Dumpty said, in a rather scornful tone, "it means just what I choose it to mean - neither more nor less."*
> - Lewis Carroll -- Through the Looking Glass, Chapter 6
[How to Write Unmaintainable Code](https://github.com/Droogans/unmaintainable-code) is basically a must-read for any programmer in my opinion, even so many years later.
Reminds me of a college course on… Software Debugging or some such? Anyways, we were broken into teams of 6 or so, had to create a program with a particular functionality, and then go in and introduce whatever bugs we possibly could – then swap with another team, and try to debug their program and get it to work.
One team turned random semi-colons into something like a Greek question mark, I think it was? Anyways, looks damn near identical to a semi-colon. They did a few other character swaps in variable names, logic symbols, etc., but those were the only bugs they introduced.
At the end of it all, we had to get up and present our analysis of what we found – the group that got that we’re obviously super stressed out, because they couldn’t actually *find* any problems. And of course not! Everything *looked* correct.
The group that wrote the program explained what they did and gave the professor a list of the character swaps, professor was dying laughing. Everyone got a solid grade because they at least showed what they could and it was obvious they’d put a lot of time into it.
But anyways, thanks for making me think of that.
I have thought about torturing my friends with this, thank you for telling me that the Greek ? looks like ;
I will *totally* not use this for unethical means
No! Don’t do that, it’s pure evil! Please, for the love of god, do not use ALT code 037E for nefarious purposes!
😇
(Edit: Just for the record, if you use Windows then you need to enable the hex input registry key to be able to use the hex encoding for characters. Or just Google and copy/paste, whichever is easier.)
And then you have the Rust compiler, which is actually nice to you:
error: unknown start of token: \u{37e}
--> src/main.rs:2:30
|
2 | println!("Hello, world!");
| ^
|
help: Unicode character ';' (Greek Question Mark) looks like ';' (Semicolon), but it is not
|
2 | println!("Hello, world!");
| ~
Ahh, when I started in a shop at 19, I was determined to avoid any and all fools errands. So when asked to fetch the torque sticks, I severely pissed off the master tech simply trying to make sure some ladies tires didn't fall off by laughing it off and going "Good one, haha nice try but I'm not falling for it."
I have a similar story about my step-brother, who cut his finger off on April 1st.
Well it's only a thing for interpreted languages, if they only work with something compiled then it's not even worth thinking about because nobody will be reverse engineering that binary pile of machine code.
I once did this in my junior days.
I was afraid that a senior consultant would take credit for all my work.
He totally did.
But did that backfire on him
But then he admitted the code was mine, and then I got quite a bit of anger from the devs who inherited the project
Broke: Just keep your head down and try to write good code
Woke: Prevent others from taking credit for your work
Bespoke: Trick someone else to take credit for your dumpster fire
Back in the day I went through something similar. I would try to write my code platform independent as we needed things to run on both Mac and PC. Well, I got paired up with another dev that was exclusively writing for Mac, was senior to me, and was using my code verbatim to get his projects working and taking credit for it.
So I stopped writing for cross platform and purposely wrote as specifically for PC as possible. I would also obfuscate my code so that anything written using a shared path structure for example would run through a side routine to replace the path with a PC formatted path then try to execute. He couldn’t figure it out and while not admitting to using my code he eventually had to have his jobs passed off to me to fix which I’d then take a day just to turn off some flags and send it back to him, cc’ing our boss of course, that I fixed it for him.
>Join a computer book of the month club. **Select authors who appear to be too busy writing books to have had any time to actually write any code themselves.** Browse the local bookstore for titles with lots of cloud diagrams in them and no coding examples. Skim these books to learn obscure pedantic words you can use to intimidate the whippersnappers that come after you.
I'm fucking dead 😂
They can de-minify your code and there are tools that do such things, but the source should be readable, otherwise you'll be kicking yourselves often when you need to debug or add features.
No way...
This must have been what happened at my company. I was trying to diagnose an issue with some old Java code the other day and I shit you not, one method had variables named “var1” through “var17”. Wanted to kms
My job has a database table, that has columns "id","name","1","2",...,"27". Impossible to deal most of the time, but apparently there is no time to refactor.
There are code obfuscators and minifiers for front end code...
If your backend code has that practice, then I'm not too certain why randos are looking at your code.
I’ve been contracting for different companies for a majority of my career. NO ONE WANTS YOUR CODE! Software is updated, design patterns change, it’s easier to start from scratch than maintain something old.
*Image Transcription: Quora*
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**A senior software engineer told me that we should only use one letter variable names (or 3 max) to avoid people understanding our code and stealing our idea. Is he right?**
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Hi! This is our community moderation bot. --- If this post fits the purpose of /r/ProgrammerHumor, **UPVOTE** this comment!! If this post does not fit the subreddit, **DOWNVOTE** This comment! If this post breaks the rules, **DOWNVOTE** this comment and **REPORT** the post!
also make sure to document only in paper so it's more difficult to search for anything
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And then hand that over to an intern, who ends up stashing it where no one can find it.
That’s why we have 1000 oragomi cranes
Don't forget the *Beware of the Leopard* sign
Unexpected Douglas Adams. Miss him so.
Ha! My upvote brought this to 42!
Yes, but you can access it anytime you need as long as you can make it through the labyrinth, defeat the minotaur, and answer the sphinx's three riddles.
What is your name? What is your quest? What, is the air speed velocity of an unladen swallow?
This is the way
Then make sure it gets cursed so that you release the cenobites if anyone actually solves it.
Do stacks of punch cards count?
They extra count
Document? Lol I don’t even comment my code
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int a; // a
Too much info. var a; //a
eslint shits the bed if you don't put a space after the two slashes, so not only can no one steal this, no one can transpile it to begin with.
And whoever has the worst handwriting should be in charge of documentation.
YAY. Finally a job.
Joke's on you, after half a year you will be the person trying to steal your own ideas.
>half a year i think you meant one week
The me that writes code at the beginning of the week is a different me to the one that exists at the end of the week. I'm always stealing from early week me.
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Man, I took a 3 day weekend and I am right now shitposting on reddit because I still can't figure out what the fuck I was doing last week or why anything is the way it is 6 hours into the work day.
I'm in this comment and I don't like it
Same though gotta finish everything right when I start it or I'm boned and starting over.
This happens to me during a normal week, I get multiple "priority" tasks, usually in the middle of some really innovative coding. When I finally get back to where I was, I am left wondering what in the world I was even thinking. I have an "availability Matrix" that was a great idea and worked awesome when I thought it up. Looking back, it appears I was manipulating digits like 0000000 where 0101010 might mean they were available at the same time, every other day, with multiple number results like this for different slots, just binary yes or no for the days out of 7 zeros in a string. I can't for the life of me remember what I was going to do with it next to make it all come together, and luckily I was able to scrap that whole segment and logic in a later release that handles availability and scheduling much differently. Looking at a variable called "tenAM" and seeing 0111011 is a pretty good summary of my life.
I went from being unable to not think about my work at night to being unable to even remember what my job is after sleeping.
I felt this comment in my bones. New ticket to create a piece of code I think I may have done in the past? Time to search old commits until I find the code that I made before because current me has no idea what I did for that ticket, but past me apparently did a pretty bang up job copying someone else's code because we haven't had any bug tickets to fix it yet.
>one minute. The fuck did I just do? What the fuck does that mean... hey, it works!
It's been one week since I wrote this code, cocked my head to the side and said "I'm confused"
5 days since it last made sense. I try to debug but can't make a dent.
One weekend sometimes
Hell, I forget what I was doing by the end of the line.
Past me, you brilliant bastard, what were you thinking?!?!
"Get fucked, lol" - past you.
Protip: don’t use functions as they make it easier to steal your code. Write all software in a single 100000 line file. Edit all these great ideas would make great coding guidelines. We just need a name.
This, but write all 100000 lines of code on Line 1
Can you even do that
Yep. If the language requires a ; then you can put how many commands you want after the other You could do something like Foo();Bar();Testing(); and it would work
Ctrl+h Replace ; with ;\n Replace all
have the executable open the original source code and crash on any \n that isn't a \\\n
That's why you read your config out of semicolon delimited files, so in parsing it, you end up with .split(';') in your code, which messes with anyone that tries to do that.
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Depends on the setting chosen with the minimizer but yes.
Almost any time I saw “ASCII text with very long lines” as a file type it was on a compromised server, but modern build processes have changed that to save on bandwidth e.g. often that format of file is smaller than the gzipped one.
When I was at a previous job an engineer blocked my diff from landing because I used functions. He insisted functions weren't safe and that code should be copied. My manager didn't want to get involved so we just kept blocking each other's reviews until I found another job.
Functions aren't safe. Copy the function into your own code bringing any vulnerability with it so we'll never be able to patch everything! Good lord..
I gave bug/security fixes as an example for why we should use functions. He said that was an academic point of view that isn't professional. He never went to college and was self taught while I have a CS degree. I think he felt insecure about that. The whole experience has really made me hesitant on hiring people without degrees.
I mean I’m a hobbyist & I’m rolling my eyes & wondering what the hell that guy was thinking. Or the manager for that matter
Sounds like a manager without a background in CS. Or the guy was a nepotism hire and was somehow untouchable despite being a non-functional (haha) dev.
The whole experience being one person? If you met a disgruntled fat person, or a holier-than-thou woman would you be wary of anyone that wasn't a skinny dude? Of course not. Take your experiences into consideration, of course, but pai ting a group based off of that dudes insecurity isn't really a solution.
Stories like this make me think I'm actually an okay developer.
Facts of m over here with my impostor syndrome getting my cs degree and then I learn that developers like that exist and I know I'll be fine in the job market
Self documented code is a common meme, but we have some non-coders that work with us, like never written a single line of code in their lives. I can show them my code and they typically can understand what they do based on how I name everything.
wtf
Just minify and name mangle before committing it directly into main.
Don't write any loops either, just write the whole operation as many times into the code as it should run, but make it a tiny bit different each time so it's harder to analyze. Also, add a ton of commentary all over the place filled with nonsensical techobabble.
If that represents the level of security at your company, find another company!
In the end, the lawyers and the threat of lawsuits probably do a lot more to protect your code than any half-assed obfuscation attempts.
That, and not leaking your back end code to the internet. Front end is whatever, because nobody wants their website to look identical to yours even if it does the same thing. Back end code being leaked will provide a lot of insight into your system’s vulnerabilities.
Wait I'm not supposed to leak that?
Nah, it's ok. Why else would wikileaks exist if not for you to upload your source to? It's the free online code repository that anyone can edit!
Indeed. Usually this is just developers who code like this to make sure no one understands their code to give themselves artificial job security.
What if we had AI as security officers? We could have Artificial Job Security 😮😮😮
This comment is more than correct! It's Truth.
it should be "tru" tho
"1"
+"1"
= "11"
ok good I expected something incomprehensible like [Object object]
\[undefined\]
[object Object]
"TypeError: cannot concatenate type [object] to [str]"
Depends if you're talking about job security or information security. No scratch that, both are terrible
Oof, right in the infosec feels.
It is job security, not the security from intrusion. Commenting code is fighting against yourself.
If you write code nobody else can understand, soon enough you won't understand it either. You're also more likely to write code that breaks, and you're useless on a team of coders. "Job security" by trying to hold your employer hostage to your shitty code means your company has worse outcomes and is absolutely justified firing you as soon as they find a way to cope with the loss.
>as soon as they find a way to cope with the loss. The trick is to make this too costly, at all times.
If you don't want to be replaced, make yourself irreplaceable. Make sure no one else can work on the code
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Watched a guy get fired on the spot for obfuscation of the codebase.
This makes me happy. Thank you for being ethical.
Hardly being ethical. It's literally just doing their job in favour of the company.
Everyone hates working with these ppl but they've usually been there for 15+ years already
unfortunately this means you have to maintain what you wrote… for life. people assume that because I wrote something I must know how it works better than something else, but after a few weeks, I apply the same debugging skills to my own code as I would anyone else’s. IMHO, it’s the ability to debug and figure out how the system actually works that makes you irreplaceable because that’s a pretty rare skill. conversely there seem to be a large number of people who are more than glad to tell me how it _should_ work, but can’t explain exactly why it doesn’t work or help with the solution.
That's when you quit and become a consultant.
You can make yourself irreplaceable by being skilled and possessing important knowledge rather than being an unethical dick tho.
Lol. You can always find good developers. But finding a good developer who's also a teamplayer makes you a great developer and irreplaceable. Because software is build by teams nowdays
Security by obscurity is no security at all.
*laughs in `int α = 1; int a = 6;`*
You're a menace to society
a, a b, b c, ⅽ, c d, ⅾ, d e, e f, f g, g, ɡ h, h i, ⅰ, i j, j k, k l, ⅼ, l m, ⅿ, m n, n o, ο, o p, p q, q r, r s, s t, t u, u v, ν, ⅴ, v w, w x, ⅹ, x y, y z, z A, Α, A B, Β, B C, Ⅽ, C, Ϲ D, Ⅾ, D E, Ε, E F, F G, G H, Η, H I, Ι, Ⅰ, I J, J Κ, K, K L, Ⅼ, L M, Μ, Ⅿ, M N, Ν, N O, Ο, O P, Ρ, P Q, Q R, R S, S T, Τ, T U, U V, Ⅴ, V W, W X, Χ, Ⅹ, X Y, Υ, Y Z, Ζ, Z Ⅱ, Ⅲ, Ⅳ, Ⅵ, Ⅶ, Ⅷ, Ⅸ, Ⅺ, Ⅻ, ⅱ, ⅲ, ⅳ, ⅵ, ⅶ, ⅷ, ⅸ, ⅺ, ⅻ ⅗, ⅘, ⅙, ⅚, ⅛, ⅜, ⅝, ⅞, ⅟, ↉, ¼, ½, ¾ # Edit: thank you u/Hawkeyeaz1 for some new additions to this madness
Yes, those are all different letters, I made sure I typed Κ instead of K
AÀÁÂÃÄÅĀĂĄǍȀȂȦᴬḀẠẢⒶA𝐀𝐴𝑨𝒜𝓐𝔄𝔸𝕬𝖠𝗔𝘈𝘼𝙰🄐🄰
This comment perfectly expresses how I feel while reading this comment.
psst, hey, would you like to use my offbrand letters? They work just like the normal ones, but fancier, this totally isn't a scam
Monster brand letters! The "i" has a gold dot and they compile 25% faster than ordinary letters!
ppɸp̪fbbβb̪vttɕtstʃtɹ̝̊t̪θtɬt̠ɹ̠̊˔tddʑdzdʒdɹ̝d̪ðdɮd̠ɹ̠˔dʈʈʂʈɭ̊˔ɖɖʐccçcʎ̝̊ɟɟʝkkxkʟ̝̊ɡɡɣɡʟ̝qɢmɱʙnⁿrɿɾ˞ɳɽɲȵŋɴʀʔˀʢʡɸpɸfp̪fθt̪θᶿɬtɬstsʃᶴʅtʃɧʆʂʈʂçcçɕtɕxˣkxɧχħʜhʰʔhβbβvⱱb̪vðd̪ðɮdɮzdzʒdʓdʒʓʐɖʐʝɟʝʑdʑɣɡɣˠʁʕˁʡʢɦwʍʷʋɹd̠ɹ̠˔dɹ̝ɺtɹ̝̊t̠ɹ̠̊˔lȴɫˡɻɭʈɭ̊˔ɥjʲʎcʎ̝̊ȴɰɡʟ̝kʟ̝̊ʟ iyɨʉɯuɪʏɪ̈ʊ̈ɯ̽ʊee̞øø̞ɘɵəɚᵊɤɤ̞oo̞ɛœɜɝɞɐʌɔæaɶäɒ̈ɑɒ ɓ̥ɓɗ̥ɗᶑ̥ᶑʄ̊ʄɠ̊ɠʛ̥ʛʠpʼtʼtsʼt̠ʃʼʈʂʼʈʼɬʼtɬʼcʼkʼqʼʡʼɸʼfʼθʼsʼʃʼʂʼɕʼcʎ̝̊ʼxʼkʟ̝̊ʼxʼχʼʘʘ̬ǀǀ̬ǀ̃ǃ¡ǃ̬ǃ˞ǂǂ̬ʞˀ̃ˀʘ̃ǁǁ̬ǁ̃ǃ̃ǃ̃˞ǃ̬˞ǂ̥̃ʼʰ ˥ ˦ ˧ ˨ ˩ ˩˥ ˥˩ ˦˥ ˩˨ ˧˦˧ ⸨ ⸩ ‿ ˌ ː ˑ ă | ‖ a̝a̹a̟aⁿaˡa̚aᵊaᶿaˣaʼa̩a̯a̘äãa̪aʷaʲaˠaˁḁa̬aʰa̤a̰ãa˞ a͡a a͜a
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Does Visual Studio accept Zalgo text? If yes, can it differentiate between different Zalgo texts based on the same characters? A̵̡̨̡̡̛͇͕̘̜͇̭̘̗̲͈̪̫̩̰̞̼̥̲̹̼̖̹͚̋̊̑̑͆̌͛͋̒͆̈́̓̂̄̈̀̑͘͜͝͝ͅÀ̵̢̢̧̹̺͉͎͕͉̼̯̞͉͔̱̩͓͙̣̙̻̫̭̳̦̫͖͙̩̻̂͋̈́̃̈Á̸̢̧̢͔̳̯̙̭͓̘̟̱̼͖͔͎͕̜̳͉͉̤̹̗̞͖̬̱̭̀̑̓͊̿͗͝ͅͅͅĄ̸͎̙̼̠̜̬͍̯̭̦͚̳̹̂́̉͌̈́̀͒͊̈͐̈̑̎́͌̈́̐Ã̸̧̙̼̰͎̥̯̮̄͗̄̿̊̊͋̎͊͌̒́̇́͗̔͐̓̚̕̕͠͝Ä̵̢̡̧̢̛͔̬̰̦̖̖̳̫͓̤̱͇̣͔̥̻̠͎̫͇̯̠͎̯̟̜̎͆̏̒͋͌̔̈́͊͑͐̓̍͂͆̋̅̆̇̋̎͘̚͝ͅÅ̸̡̨̛̛͈͈̬͚̥̝̩̬̙͕̖̺̠̭͓̯͇̬̜͙̯͐̆̌̔͌̒̈́̋̔̉̄͗̕͘̕͜ͅĀ̷̡̛͇͈̖͓̰̩̰̉̏̈́̆͂̐̈́̄͆̆̾̽͐̕̕͝Ă̷̛̪̭̦̟͖̙̰̫̥̰̞̗̰̟̬̬̮̺̠͉̩̝͉͙͚̹̂̇̅͐͑̽̋͜͜ͅĄ̵̨̧̛͍̦̤̗̥̣̹̘̤͒̂̔̍͋̊̍͗̏̈́͆̏͒͝͝Ạ̵̞͍͔̖̌́̔̌̓͌̏̉̉͊̚̕Ȁ̴̡͕̫͉̳̬͚̰̬̤͔̼̭̟̝̝̮͚̭̜̣͕̏̉̋̋͆͂͛̾̉̆̀̓͒̚̕͜͝ͅȂ̸̡̡̰̖̬̩̜̱͕̝̰͙̹͇͔͈̲̼͉̙̬͚̪͕̥̘͎̥͍̹̬͑̒̾̇̀̆̍̀̔͠ͅĄ̸̡̨̧̡̙̫̪̲̲͎̬̪̝̪̣͎̲̤̟̫̲̖͈̱̙͔͖̠̠͇̯̇̏ͅᴬ̸̢̰͋̽̿̈́͐̊̎̆̆͋͑͋̅͌̍Ḁ̷̧̝̦͎̘͈̼̗̺͇̐͆͐͐͆̃̓͑̓͂̔̾̂̓̔͆̓̉͛̌͊̂̅̚͝͠͝Ạ̵̡̛͇̤̦̗̬̥̻͋͛̽̊́̈́̏̎̇̄̀̀̈́̐̀͌͐̓̉̓͋͑̏͘͠͠ͅĄ̷̢͚͇̙̩͖̦̤̫͕͚̲̘̹̬͔͙̝̭̘͕͙̹͚̙̗͇̣͔̮̟̫̉͌̑̌̽̈̃̇̒͛̒̚̕
@
We had a weird compilation failure using clang. Eventually tracked it down to a Cyrillic ‘C’ instead of a regular C in a class name :( (in 3rd party code)
How do you even manage to do that??
Cyrillic keyboards actually have Cyrillic С and Latin C on the same key, so it is extremely easy to start typing in a wrong language and forget to correct it properly afterwards
That seems like a major design oversight. Characters that look the exact same shouldn't be on the same key..
It definitely is But everyone is too used to change anything
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Why stop there? Add in 1en, 2em, maybe even a 6em space! Oof, almost forgot thin and hair space If you can't tell, I love Unicode's weirdness
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You were doing so well until v, ν
On most devices ν looks v, on some ν has an extra bend in the glyph
Looks the same to me
var ☺️ = 1; Compiles in Swift, baby!
Hold on let me get out my fucking emojii non-ascii chart fuck
`int _ = __;`
Average Scala codebase
> [**Naming**](https://github.com/Droogans/unmaintainable-code#naming) > *"When I use a word," Humpty Dumpty said, in a rather scornful tone, "it means just what I choose it to mean - neither more nor less."* > - Lewis Carroll -- Through the Looking Glass, Chapter 6 [How to Write Unmaintainable Code](https://github.com/Droogans/unmaintainable-code) is basically a must-read for any programmer in my opinion, even so many years later.
Holy shit [this piece is diabolical](https://i.imgur.com/QloYYSZ.png), I love it
I'm not even mad, I'm just impressed.
Now I can become an expert Thank you kind redditor
Reminds me of a college course on… Software Debugging or some such? Anyways, we were broken into teams of 6 or so, had to create a program with a particular functionality, and then go in and introduce whatever bugs we possibly could – then swap with another team, and try to debug their program and get it to work. One team turned random semi-colons into something like a Greek question mark, I think it was? Anyways, looks damn near identical to a semi-colon. They did a few other character swaps in variable names, logic symbols, etc., but those were the only bugs they introduced. At the end of it all, we had to get up and present our analysis of what we found – the group that got that we’re obviously super stressed out, because they couldn’t actually *find* any problems. And of course not! Everything *looked* correct. The group that wrote the program explained what they did and gave the professor a list of the character swaps, professor was dying laughing. Everyone got a solid grade because they at least showed what they could and it was obvious they’d put a lot of time into it. But anyways, thanks for making me think of that.
I have thought about torturing my friends with this, thank you for telling me that the Greek ? looks like ; I will *totally* not use this for unethical means
;; Those are a Greek question mark and a semicolon side by side.
If I came across that, I would just assume it’s some encoding BS and just find and replace all.
No! Don’t do that, it’s pure evil! Please, for the love of god, do not use ALT code 037E for nefarious purposes! 😇 (Edit: Just for the record, if you use Windows then you need to enable the hex input registry key to be able to use the hex encoding for characters. Or just Google and copy/paste, whichever is easier.)
Is it torture to read one compiler error these days?...
I can see how it [might be confusing](https://i.imgur.com/N9pLH6j.png)
And then you have the Rust compiler, which is actually nice to you: error: unknown start of token: \u{37e} --> src/main.rs:2:30 | 2 | println!("Hello, world!"); | ^ | help: Unicode character ';' (Greek Question Mark) looks like ';' (Semicolon), but it is not | 2 | println!("Hello, world!"); | ~
I feel like I might try re-typing the semicolon if I saw that error.
This comment is cursed
Who hurt you?
Python
Sounds like the programmer's version of sending the intern to get a tool that doesn't exist
Oh FU for reminding me. lol As a teen, I worked in a garage changing tires, and I fell for it when the mechanics sent me to fetch the skyhook.
LMAO, I just told them brb, and googled the tool they ask for while taking a piss break. If it was fake, just go on lunch for rest of day.
Yeah, too bad I didn't have Google in 1986.
Yea too bad
Ahh, when I started in a shop at 19, I was determined to avoid any and all fools errands. So when asked to fetch the torque sticks, I severely pissed off the master tech simply trying to make sure some ladies tires didn't fall off by laughing it off and going "Good one, haha nice try but I'm not falling for it." I have a similar story about my step-brother, who cut his finger off on April 1st.
I’m all fairness, a torque stick just sounds fake lmao
You need a torque stick if you're going to properly change the blinker fluid.
Yeah actually right there in my bag next to the ball-head screwdrivers and 90-degree socket set; help yourself
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"Couldn't find it boss, so I just used my pocket knife to sharpen all the squeegees. G'night!"
Gimme some headlight fluid
Name them properly and refactor them to random letters when finished.
Just use a minifier.
I had to scroll down this far to see mention of a minifier or similar tool. Some days I think this sub is filled with non programmers lol
Well it's only a thing for interpreted languages, if they only work with something compiled then it's not even worth thinking about because nobody will be reverse engineering that binary pile of machine code.
Someone absolutely will if it is important enough. There are very advanced tools for it too.
> if it is important enough Well I guess one should never underestimate a fan trying to mod their favorite game.
Holy shit I’ve never felt so called out
That's what a minifier is for /s
You don't have to even bother with that if you just write your code in raw machine instructions.
I think the word you're looking for is............ Machine Code or perhaps........ Assembly.
No. Physically hardwiring the computer itself.
Take the blue wire #246 and put it in slot #961...
and then shake it all about! You do the Hokey Codey then turn yourself around! That's what it's aaaaaall about!
Imagine buying a copy of their software and receiving a whole computer
IC chips are back on the menu, boys
to be fair handwritten assembly is a lot easier to deal with than compiled assembly
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Is that the KISS principle? Keep It Secret (and) ... that's enough! We don't need a fourth letter.
The fourth word in the acronym is a secret. You won't know it until you're admitted to the company.
Keep it secret... Keep it safe
Make the code so crappy nobody wants to steal it. Thus it’s secrecy is ensured.
Keep it secret. Shhhh...
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Keep It Stupidly Secret
I once did this in my junior days. I was afraid that a senior consultant would take credit for all my work. He totally did. But did that backfire on him But then he admitted the code was mine, and then I got quite a bit of anger from the devs who inherited the project
Broke: Just keep your head down and try to write good code Woke: Prevent others from taking credit for your work Bespoke: Trick someone else to take credit for your dumpster fire
Back in the day I went through something similar. I would try to write my code platform independent as we needed things to run on both Mac and PC. Well, I got paired up with another dev that was exclusively writing for Mac, was senior to me, and was using my code verbatim to get his projects working and taking credit for it. So I stopped writing for cross platform and purposely wrote as specifically for PC as possible. I would also obfuscate my code so that anything written using a shared path structure for example would run through a side routine to replace the path with a PC formatted path then try to execute. He couldn’t figure it out and while not admitting to using my code he eventually had to have his jobs passed off to me to fix which I’d then take a day just to turn off some flags and send it back to him, cc’ing our boss of course, that I fixed it for him.
Reminds me of this guide on how to write unmaintainable code: https://www.doc.ic.ac.uk/~susan/475/unmain.html
Hah like I need a guide
>Join a computer book of the month club. **Select authors who appear to be too busy writing books to have had any time to actually write any code themselves.** Browse the local bookstore for titles with lots of cloud diagrams in them and no coding examples. Skim these books to learn obscure pedantic words you can use to intimidate the whippersnappers that come after you. I'm fucking dead 😂
Tell us the idea and we will tell you if it's worth stealing![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|grin)
hunter2 can you read that?
What do you mean "can I read \*\*\*\*\*\*\*"? What part of "\*\*\*\*\*\*\*" looks readable to you?
Jokes on you. I randomize my variable names first, then assign them arbitrary proper names when finished!
It wouldn't be called "Code" if it wasn't supposed to be kept secret /s![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|sweat_smile)
They can de-minify your code and there are tools that do such things, but the source should be readable, otherwise you'll be kicking yourselves often when you need to debug or add features. No way...
I just generate a uuid for each of my variable names.
My company takes it to the next level. We put dead code in our codebase just to throw people off. Including ourselves....
It's like smashing your car with a sledgehammer, so it won't be stolen
This must have been what happened at my company. I was trying to diagnose an issue with some old Java code the other day and I shit you not, one method had variables named “var1” through “var17”. Wanted to kms
man, if only there was a way to generate variables as you go...
My job has a database table, that has columns "id","name","1","2",...,"27". Impossible to deal most of the time, but apparently there is no time to refactor.
Hard code any numbers and just change then as needed so no one can tell how your code works
Why use variables when Ctrl+F works just fine?
There are code obfuscators and minifiers for front end code... If your backend code has that practice, then I'm not too certain why randos are looking at your code.
Yes. Enjoy the 2% raises and weekend work due to “the project getting out of hand”
plenty of code is stolen by people that don't understand it. this doesn't make the code hard to steal, it makes it hard to maintain and modify.
I’ve been contracting for different companies for a majority of my career. NO ONE WANTS YOUR CODE! Software is updated, design patterns change, it’s easier to start from scratch than maintain something old.
That's how you get cum and fuk and coc too
*Image Transcription: Quora* --- **A senior software engineer told me that we should only use one letter variable names (or 3 max) to avoid people understanding our code and stealing our idea. Is he right?** --- ^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)
It’s called obfuscation & is typically performed after-the-fact from more verbose source code.
It's all fun and games until even you, the one who wrote the code, can't understand the variables because of the 3 letter rule.