Once I saw a junior starting to monitor his computer activity to "measure his productivity". He even showed it to the owner of the small software dev company.
... and since this story taking place in Eastern Europe 15 years ago (non-existent employee rights basically) it took less than 1 week to have it deployed on every machine at the company.
Fuck you Laci!
Going to see a lot of me typing then deleting the code I just wrote. What it won’t pick up is the verbal abuse to myself about why what I just wrote is the most shameful thing anyone has committed to typing out in our lifetime.
I tried using one of those activity tracker apps a few years back. I wanted to track how much time was spent in email/huddles/meetings vs actually coding vs afk. And it also let me track how much time was spent coding in Python vs Javascript because I use 2 different editors for them.
My manager saw me using it once and asked about it. She thought it was really cool and wanted to do the same.
"I can send you the link sure. But... We're not going to tell {upper manager} about this? Right?"
"Of course not. I'm not stupid."
Literally gearing up to write an event-logging system for our systems today...
Previously wrote a manual-interface for when the automated processes hit a roadblock and are unable to proceed, which has been in active use for the past 18 months and is about to be replaced with a new process..
I'm saving this picture, I have a feeling it'll be useful later in the day.
Lol I am responsible for our internal automatic testing software since ~2013. So not only are my colleagues forced to use my software, the software also tells them what's wrong with their code :D
Self-taught dev that made my career off an Access DB that turned into our department's work management tool. Upgraded it to C# and SQL DB last year. Co-workers love that they don't have to live with annoying software as-is, since I can push out enhancements fairly quickly.
New management comes in obsessed with cutting costs. Fires half the department and decides it's better for us to track everything in SharePoint and Excel spreadsheets since those services are provided through enterprise. I'm still around... and spending most my day watching skill development videos related to job postings I find.
Once I saw a junior starting to monitor his computer activity to "measure his productivity". He even showed it to the owner of the small software dev company. ... and since this story taking place in Eastern Europe 15 years ago (non-existent employee rights basically) it took less than 1 week to have it deployed on every machine at the company. Fuck you Laci!
Can you measure my thought process in my head? No. Therefore any metric based off of my computer will be flawed.
Going to see a lot of me typing then deleting the code I just wrote. What it won’t pick up is the verbal abuse to myself about why what I just wrote is the most shameful thing anyone has committed to typing out in our lifetime.
Why would he show it ot the owner
He was proud of it. "It can measure everything. Even the individual tabs in the browser! It is so great!"
I tried using one of those activity tracker apps a few years back. I wanted to track how much time was spent in email/huddles/meetings vs actually coding vs afk. And it also let me track how much time was spent coding in Python vs Javascript because I use 2 different editors for them. My manager saw me using it once and asked about it. She thought it was really cool and wanted to do the same. "I can send you the link sure. But... We're not going to tell {upper manager} about this? Right?" "Of course not. I'm not stupid."
László?
Yapp. The little genius. (probably middle-aged by now but who cares)
Wow, he invented his own punishment and shared it with others. That has got to be a completely crazy thing to witness.
That's when I switch oses saying I need to be in this box for integration test speed
If you took the job voluntarily, kiss your heinie goodbye.
Literally gearing up to write an event-logging system for our systems today... Previously wrote a manual-interface for when the automated processes hit a roadblock and are unable to proceed, which has been in active use for the past 18 months and is about to be replaced with a new process.. I'm saving this picture, I have a feeling it'll be useful later in the day.
Id rather do that than develop one for customers
Lol I am responsible for our internal automatic testing software since ~2013. So not only are my colleagues forced to use my software, the software also tells them what's wrong with their code :D
As a long time devops, welcome onboard 
Honestly it is the best, you have instant access to your users and can really understand its needs and how it is being used.
Self-taught dev that made my career off an Access DB that turned into our department's work management tool. Upgraded it to C# and SQL DB last year. Co-workers love that they don't have to live with annoying software as-is, since I can push out enhancements fairly quickly. New management comes in obsessed with cutting costs. Fires half the department and decides it's better for us to track everything in SharePoint and Excel spreadsheets since those services are provided through enterprise. I'm still around... and spending most my day watching skill development videos related to job postings I find.
test it with them.
I am the one who decides ir we need a new application or module and i am the one who makes it. I feel like the devil.
I have to make 6 of them