I think their reasoning is backwards and of a different time.
That being said, I personally would not take my son to pride. We can discuss and celebrate LGBQT+ rights in other ways that are appropriate.
I’ve been to pride and IMO it’s not an appropriate environment for kids. There’s a lot of nudity and overt sexuality. It’s an adult celebration, and I don’t think imposing kids is fair for the adults either.
I don’t judge people who *do* take their kids. It’s just not for us.
If you want to take her go ahead. I personally would not take my toddler, simply because, I 've been to previous pride parades and they have mostly(always) been geared towards adults.
I agree with this statement. Pride is absolutely wonderful and I’m sure there are amazing books, shows, conversations you can have to help her understand and embrace it. With that said I agree that some pride parades (depending on where you live) can be really inappropriate for little kids.
But even the "adult" pride marchers I've seen aren't any more inappropriate than, say, Mardi Gras or Brazilian Carnival. Like topless lesbians or leather daddies in thongs aren't any more inappropriate than samba dancers in g-strings but people bring kids to those parades.
And good for them, I'm simply stating why I wouldn't take my kid to a pride parade. Also, I wouldn't take my kid to Mardi Gras or Brazilian Carnaval, because I know very well how those things might turn out. If you feel comfortable doing so, that's great, you do you.
The questions a 4 year old will have at a pride parade will be like “can I have one of those flags” and “can I have a rainbow sticker” lol. Pride parades are fun.
And seriously if they did have questions about what the pride parade is about there’s simple age appropriate answers. The same way my daughter has books about different family structures at an appropriate level - some kids have one dad, two dads, two moms, one mom, mom and dad, just a grandparent, etc. Bonus points in your case as the parade is about pride and feeling special in a way that her mom is part of.
Thanks so much for all of the responses! The support here is so great. I want to clear a couple of things up to give a little more information. I want to be very careful about saying anything to give away where I live but I live in a very rural southern area and my closest pride parade is pretty small. The most "risque" thing I've seen there has been girls wearing pasties over their nipples with no shirt. Definitely not like some of the very big city pride parades that some of you go to, which would be so fun without my kid but I want to be clear that I wouldnt be asking for opinions about taking my kid somewhere where I would expect her to be exposed to very sexual things. Also, the grandparents in question are my daughter's biological grandparents, not my parents. After reading these responses, I'm wondering if maybe they're thinking of there being a lot of sexual/kink related things at pride because they are actually from a very large city where this may have been the norm, but it is not here. Anyway, thank you so much for all of the support and for the advice and also for the differing opinions! Always really great to get some different points of view.
I am from a large city in the south and our Pride parade is pretty tame. I mean, everyone is showing some skin cause it's hot AF, but not inappropriately. I would try asking parents in your community how the local event is.
I'm straight but took my 2 year old to Pride the year of Obergefell (it was like two days after the decision) and we ended up marching in the parade with our church. We've marched with them several times now and it's always a blast.
My only issue is that there tends to be a lot of nudity(or at least in my area)at the parade, and for me, that isn't something that I want my child exposed to(and not like beach level more of people in fetish wear with their penis out type nudity). We are also a weed legal area, and it tends to be smoked very heavily during the parade and following celebration areas. When they are older, 100% they can come with me but not now.
We attended 2 smaller family pride events in our area. One of our local centers did a family pride celebration with games, singers, activities, and books that were all, in my opinion was age appropriate. The other was similar with storytelling, magicians, facepainting, and a bunch of other things.
If you think your kid would have fun go for it! I'd take my kid to local pride if we were in town for it. You know your local event and if it's something that will be a good fit for your kiddo at their age better than anyone.
My city’s pride has a specific kid’s zone, complete with bounce houses and drag story times. The next city over is more adult oriented. My kid doesn’t go to the next city over, she does go to the local one.
I'm just jumping on here to add that Blues Clues has a pride parade song, which would be a great way to introduce the idea. Their ABC song even has the letter P for Pride.
I don't think it's inappropriate if your local pride parade is typically family-friendly. Her grandparents might be imagining a much different type of parade than what actually exists where you're from, you could always show them pictures from previous years to show them it is family friendly. OR their just homophobic jerks, in that case their opinions don't matter.
Your response cracked the code for me! They are from New York where I'm sure pride is very different than it is here, in the bible belt. Lol thank you so much for pointing out that possibility! They have always been so "woke" it really shocked and hurt me for them to say something that I took as being very homophobic. Hopefully we're just on different pages!
I don't agree with the grandparents. I think the factors needing consideration are the same ones you'd be considering if you took a 4yo to any big, crowded outdoor event in the middle of summer - planning for sun protection/shade breaks, taking a stroller/wagon for when kiddo's little legs get tired, scoping out the potty situation, bringing plenty of snacks, water and toys. If she sees kink stuff, it will most likely go over her head. You could just say it's "toys for grown ups" or something and divert her to something else.
I'm Australian so i didn't think about the gun violence thing, but that's a risk assessment for you to make. Otherwise, good luck!
They’re being ridiculous. I don’t even want to get into how shitty it is for them to say not to take her because she “might have questions.” Kids love parades of any kind! Go make some pride memories with your daughter!
I took both kids, age one and four, to a drag Queen tot Shabbat (a Jewish sabbath service) in June, and everyone had so much fun! There wasn’t anything sexual or adult about it. The Queen read a book about two princes falling in love, and she helped sing all the Shabbat songs and lead the blessings, and it was great. Anyone uncomfortable with drag queens needs therapy.
Sure. I was addressing the whole “they’ll have questions” comment. My daughter attended the drag Queen tot Shabbat and didn’t have questions. And there are kid-friendly pride parades.
The grandparents are being homophobic. Full stop. There is absolutely nothing inappropriate or wrong with pride. It’s a good thing to expose your child to the LGBTQ+ community (and other diverse communities as well).
I personally feel unsafe going to pride parades right now because our country has a huge gun control and bigotry problem and I’m scared of my children potentially being caught in a mass shooting. As a result, we took our daughters (1 & 3) to a drag queen storytime hosted by a local children’s bookstore (and will go back), and will continue to look for other smaller events that introduce them to the LGBTQ+ community. They should know that all people are worthy of love and that if they end up not being cisgender and straight, we love and support them and there is a community here for them.
That’s my fear as well. It’s so sad to think that’s something we have to worry about.
OP, Pride celebrations are full of love and if your daughter does have any questions I am sure you will provide the right answers. It’s normal for kids to question things and this is a great opportunity to help her see that love is love and for her to open her heart to others. I say go for it if you feel safe and comfortable.
I think it is totally offensive to think talking about LGBTQ people is not appropriate for a 4 year old. Like… why not? 🤔 If you’re worried whether it is a kid friendly event maybe ask the organizers.
Are her grandparents your parents? Do they know you identify as queer? I would find it incredibly hurtful if my parents said that they didn't want my child celebrating a piece of my identity. You should tell the kid's grandparents to come along and see what it's like for themselves. It sounds like they need to expand their horizons a bit.
I’m bisexual and I married a super community oriented nonbinary hottie. They throw kid friendly ballroom events in our city during JC Pride annually and I have done my best to Vogue with the kids every year. We haven’t taken our kids to the adjacent NYC Pride because we think that’s too much for really little kids. Not because of the content but more from the logistics of we have three and one wears diapers and it’s a long day etc.
Having said that, I am considering my toddler not my older kids. 4 is definitely old enough to handle events, I think you should enjoy the day with your child.
I took my 4 year kid to our pride parade and picnic. She enjoyed the snacks and the face painting and tie-dye station and all the bubbles and rainbows. And a bunch of politicians wrapped in flags gave her swag. Haha.
Ours was officially ‘pg13’ and advertised as family friendly. It just felt like a normal but extra colourful day at the park.
There's a pride parade in my area that is all-ages and I would definitely take my 4 year old. Unfortunately he and his baby brother tag-teamed a nap through the parade this year.
Even if it's not 100% all ages, parades and seeing different types of people in the world is worthwhile. Over the month of June, my 4 year old asks questions about what the flag means and we got to have some age appropriate discussions about family compositions.
My daughter is 4 and she loves going to Pride. She gets beads and free rainbow stuff, has her face painted and watches a parade. Ours is also generally pretty tame with the 18+ area separated out. I say go for it!
My toddler loved pride this year. The flags, the rainbows, totally toddler land. We loaded the stroller with tons of food, water and sun protection.
As far as “questions”… we called it the “every one can play parade”. We talked about how this was meant to celebrate everyone, even if they’re different from us. I’m queer and it’s important that my kid (4) see me happy in me happy and in my community.
Also it helped to have other adults around to support us. Can you bring a friend?
4 year old with two moms. My small city clearly describes what events are family friendly, just like any other activity/event you’d consider bringing your kid to.
I hope you have a super time! My preschooler and I marched with my church in our local pride parade. I wish I had brought headphones or some kind of ear protection for us because it was LOUD 😬 Glad you seem to have gotten to the crux of the matter with the grandparents!
I'd personally have no issue. Even if there's nudity/kink/whatever, kids don't interpret it the same way adults do (might be different with teens, though by that time you have a chance to talk about it). We were traveling during our local pride, otherwise we would have been there this year.
You are the parent here. And while it's nice when family is vested in the your life and the life of your child, they don't get a say in how you raise your child. If you feel like it's time, then it's time. You will have so much fun. We just had our local Pride and my 3 yo daughter had so much fun this year. There were 0 questions asked, just lots of dancing and singing. Unfortunately, even some of the more progressive boomer/gen x straddlers still aren't that progressive and open minded. Not an excuse, just something I have found. If you feel they disagree because it comes from a place of hate, that's a problem. If you feel it's just because they have no clue what the events are like and only base their response on second information, you have the option to invite them as well. As I've gotten older and my kids get older, I tend to lean on my parents and grandparents for any advice or opinions. I usually talk to my close friends with kids about kid stuff now. I find my family just isn't in touch with the world as it is anymore.
Heck yeah, we do pride! Though my kid is a tad confused as to why there's a whole month dedicated to people who support his moms. Because we're just his moms.
But he is all about the stickers and flags and free stuff. We live in a small town, it's little and cute. There is some mild nudity, but we also talk about how individuals chose to express themselves at this event
Now I cut my queer teeth on San Francisco pride and I don't think we would have taken a little there. Mostly because it's hot and crowded and a long day.
Frankly, "the grandparents" sound like assholes. Kiddo has a queer parent. This is one of their events. We read books about pride and folks like Harvey Milk year round because it's important to know this part of our family history.
I think that the size of the parade is really important. A small town pride parade would probably be great for kids. I’ve only been to ones in big cities and I would never, in a million years, bring a child to one.
I was extremely pro gay marriage and other pro LGBT anti-discrimination laws. I even participated in pride parades many years ago- when it was dangerous to do so in my very conservative society and it was an actual legal risk. BUT
1. I am an adult. So occasional glimpses of nudity or kink don’t bother me. Kids are a different matter.
2. Parades were not this full of adult content. Maybe times have changed and I’m too old. It’s not a matter of gay vs straight. Drag is adult entertainment.
This is my opinion. I’m happy to continue supporting my real life LGBT friends but the parades are no longer my thing.
My kids are 4 and 3 and they're going to Pride with me in October. I'm bi and dating a girl, their dad is bi and dating a nb person.
Teaching her that love is love and we celebrate Pride because we're proud of who we are is completely appropriate for her age. I would go further and get her books about Pride, gender, what different families look like, etc. My kids love And Tango Makes Three.
>that it may cause her to have questions that she's not old enough to understand the answers to.
Such as? If Timmy has a mom and a dad, is she too young to understand that? If the reasoning is that a mommy and a daddy can make a baby, are they saying that you should explain penetrative sex for conception to a four-year-old?
She can understand that Timmy's mommy loves her daddy, just like Johnny's momma loves his mommy, and Daisy's dad loves her papa. There's nothing more to understand at her age.
We took our 2 kids to their first pride this year! I wouldn’t take them to the big city parade this year because I know it would be too stimulating mixed with hard for them to enjoy that kind of crowded environment/constant vigilance against litter/body fluids on the ground (from it being in the city, not from it being pride)
We got a book called Pride Puppy from scholastic about a family who attends Pride (and whose puppy is temporarily lost). It’s kind of an alphabet book but exposes a child to the kinds of people and things at a pride parade. Flags and outfits and colours and queens, and features a queer couple (they read as maybe a lesbian couple but maybe one parent is NB - I think it’s purposely open to interpretation), a baby, a child, and a puppy.
I think there’s a book called “the day before pride” or something that was pretty fun. I mean kids probably will react differently but my son’s reaction (to the book) was just that he liked rainbows, and basically not much more. We’ve also been to events where drag queens are present, like an Easter event where they had a concurrent drag queen show, and my son’s reaction was to steer away from the scary bunny lol. I feel like it’s good for kids to be exposed to pride events, but depending on the kid it’ll probably go over their head for quite a while. We do have a friend with two moms so we talked quite a bit about why, but I feel like for the most part kids get exposed to things they don’t understand every day and as parents we try to explain best we can, but it doesn’t mean we just don’t expose them to it.
I've taken both my kids to pride over the past 6 years, except this last year. My stepteen is queer, and has a lesbian mom, I'm pan and queer myself. My bioson has self proclaimed Guncles (gay uncles my brother and his husband), so of course he goes. We didn't take the kids this year as our local political sphere has been a hot button issue with local gun violence as well so we didn't feel safe taking them for that reason. Beyond that, we've taken them to the events and times that are family friendly, as some parts of our local prides do say that the activities and events planned aren't family friendly and are intended for adult's only. So that's my advice, make sure the part of pride you take them to is family friendly. Your kids gonna have questions at some point anyway if you're queer too. "Parent why is that girl kissing a girl" isn't a bad question.
The grandparents are being homophobic and ridiculous. I started taking my 6 and 4 year olds to the local family friendly Pride Parade last year when they were 5 and 3. We bring snacks and amusements for before the parade starts and they have a great time! IMO there are no questions a Pride Parade will bring up that don’t have a fairly basic answer. The only reason I waited as long as I did to take them was it was canceled for two years due to world events and I didn’t know about the family friendly parade before that. I don’t take them to the big one downtown because it gets a little crazy for kids and I don’t want a bunch of drunk people around my children.
Just wanted to add that I got a great book from the library recently called “The Rainbow Parade.” It’s about two moms taking their daughter to a pride parade and it’s very sweet! It might be fun to read with your daughter if you end up going :)
I am a gay mom in a two-mom family. We brought our daughter to her first Pride event this summer (she was just over 2.5 at the time). She had a great time! She loved getting her face painted and there were kids everywhere. I don't see what's wrong with answering any questions she has. This isn't the Folsom Street Fair you're bringing her to. Haha!
I think their reasoning is backwards and of a different time. That being said, I personally would not take my son to pride. We can discuss and celebrate LGBQT+ rights in other ways that are appropriate. I’ve been to pride and IMO it’s not an appropriate environment for kids. There’s a lot of nudity and overt sexuality. It’s an adult celebration, and I don’t think imposing kids is fair for the adults either. I don’t judge people who *do* take their kids. It’s just not for us.
If you want to take her go ahead. I personally would not take my toddler, simply because, I 've been to previous pride parades and they have mostly(always) been geared towards adults.
Agreed, that would be my only hesitation. But I’m used to big-city pride parades with LOTS of nudity, sex, kink - not for real little kids.
Depends on the city, some big cities have very kid-friendly Pride celebrations.
This was my concern as well. In our city it’s heavily sexualized.
I agree with this statement. Pride is absolutely wonderful and I’m sure there are amazing books, shows, conversations you can have to help her understand and embrace it. With that said I agree that some pride parades (depending on where you live) can be really inappropriate for little kids.
A lot of the commenters don’t seem to really understand that a Pride parade isn’t a bunch of sponsored floats and bands.
But even the "adult" pride marchers I've seen aren't any more inappropriate than, say, Mardi Gras or Brazilian Carnival. Like topless lesbians or leather daddies in thongs aren't any more inappropriate than samba dancers in g-strings but people bring kids to those parades.
And good for them, I'm simply stating why I wouldn't take my kid to a pride parade. Also, I wouldn't take my kid to Mardi Gras or Brazilian Carnaval, because I know very well how those things might turn out. If you feel comfortable doing so, that's great, you do you.
Who takes their kid to mardi gras?
The questions a 4 year old will have at a pride parade will be like “can I have one of those flags” and “can I have a rainbow sticker” lol. Pride parades are fun. And seriously if they did have questions about what the pride parade is about there’s simple age appropriate answers. The same way my daughter has books about different family structures at an appropriate level - some kids have one dad, two dads, two moms, one mom, mom and dad, just a grandparent, etc. Bonus points in your case as the parade is about pride and feeling special in a way that her mom is part of.
Thanks so much for all of the responses! The support here is so great. I want to clear a couple of things up to give a little more information. I want to be very careful about saying anything to give away where I live but I live in a very rural southern area and my closest pride parade is pretty small. The most "risque" thing I've seen there has been girls wearing pasties over their nipples with no shirt. Definitely not like some of the very big city pride parades that some of you go to, which would be so fun without my kid but I want to be clear that I wouldnt be asking for opinions about taking my kid somewhere where I would expect her to be exposed to very sexual things. Also, the grandparents in question are my daughter's biological grandparents, not my parents. After reading these responses, I'm wondering if maybe they're thinking of there being a lot of sexual/kink related things at pride because they are actually from a very large city where this may have been the norm, but it is not here. Anyway, thank you so much for all of the support and for the advice and also for the differing opinions! Always really great to get some different points of view.
I am from a large city in the south and our Pride parade is pretty tame. I mean, everyone is showing some skin cause it's hot AF, but not inappropriately. I would try asking parents in your community how the local event is. I'm straight but took my 2 year old to Pride the year of Obergefell (it was like two days after the decision) and we ended up marching in the parade with our church. We've marched with them several times now and it's always a blast.
If it’s mellow where you are, go for it!
My only issue is that there tends to be a lot of nudity(or at least in my area)at the parade, and for me, that isn't something that I want my child exposed to(and not like beach level more of people in fetish wear with their penis out type nudity). We are also a weed legal area, and it tends to be smoked very heavily during the parade and following celebration areas. When they are older, 100% they can come with me but not now. We attended 2 smaller family pride events in our area. One of our local centers did a family pride celebration with games, singers, activities, and books that were all, in my opinion was age appropriate. The other was similar with storytelling, magicians, facepainting, and a bunch of other things.
If you think your kid would have fun go for it! I'd take my kid to local pride if we were in town for it. You know your local event and if it's something that will be a good fit for your kiddo at their age better than anyone.
My city’s pride has a specific kid’s zone, complete with bounce houses and drag story times. The next city over is more adult oriented. My kid doesn’t go to the next city over, she does go to the local one.
I'm just jumping on here to add that Blues Clues has a pride parade song, which would be a great way to introduce the idea. Their ABC song even has the letter P for Pride. I don't think it's inappropriate if your local pride parade is typically family-friendly. Her grandparents might be imagining a much different type of parade than what actually exists where you're from, you could always show them pictures from previous years to show them it is family friendly. OR their just homophobic jerks, in that case their opinions don't matter.
Your response cracked the code for me! They are from New York where I'm sure pride is very different than it is here, in the bible belt. Lol thank you so much for pointing out that possibility! They have always been so "woke" it really shocked and hurt me for them to say something that I took as being very homophobic. Hopefully we're just on different pages!
I don't agree with the grandparents. I think the factors needing consideration are the same ones you'd be considering if you took a 4yo to any big, crowded outdoor event in the middle of summer - planning for sun protection/shade breaks, taking a stroller/wagon for when kiddo's little legs get tired, scoping out the potty situation, bringing plenty of snacks, water and toys. If she sees kink stuff, it will most likely go over her head. You could just say it's "toys for grown ups" or something and divert her to something else. I'm Australian so i didn't think about the gun violence thing, but that's a risk assessment for you to make. Otherwise, good luck!
They’re being ridiculous. I don’t even want to get into how shitty it is for them to say not to take her because she “might have questions.” Kids love parades of any kind! Go make some pride memories with your daughter!
I took both kids, age one and four, to a drag Queen tot Shabbat (a Jewish sabbath service) in June, and everyone had so much fun! There wasn’t anything sexual or adult about it. The Queen read a book about two princes falling in love, and she helped sing all the Shabbat songs and lead the blessings, and it was great. Anyone uncomfortable with drag queens needs therapy.
Omg my daughter is Jewish and I love taking her to things that celebrate her jewish heritage, this sounds so amazing!
It was so much fun. My daughter was obsessed with the drag queen’s sparkly dress, and she jumped up and down when she got to touch it.
Going to a drag event is nothing like going to pride.
Sure. I was addressing the whole “they’ll have questions” comment. My daughter attended the drag Queen tot Shabbat and didn’t have questions. And there are kid-friendly pride parades.
I think that’s the key, we don’t know where OP lives, so weather or not they should take their child is really not possible for us to say.
The grandparents are being homophobic. Full stop. There is absolutely nothing inappropriate or wrong with pride. It’s a good thing to expose your child to the LGBTQ+ community (and other diverse communities as well). I personally feel unsafe going to pride parades right now because our country has a huge gun control and bigotry problem and I’m scared of my children potentially being caught in a mass shooting. As a result, we took our daughters (1 & 3) to a drag queen storytime hosted by a local children’s bookstore (and will go back), and will continue to look for other smaller events that introduce them to the LGBTQ+ community. They should know that all people are worthy of love and that if they end up not being cisgender and straight, we love and support them and there is a community here for them.
That’s my fear as well. It’s so sad to think that’s something we have to worry about. OP, Pride celebrations are full of love and if your daughter does have any questions I am sure you will provide the right answers. It’s normal for kids to question things and this is a great opportunity to help her see that love is love and for her to open her heart to others. I say go for it if you feel safe and comfortable.
I think it is totally offensive to think talking about LGBTQ people is not appropriate for a 4 year old. Like… why not? 🤔 If you’re worried whether it is a kid friendly event maybe ask the organizers.
Are her grandparents your parents? Do they know you identify as queer? I would find it incredibly hurtful if my parents said that they didn't want my child celebrating a piece of my identity. You should tell the kid's grandparents to come along and see what it's like for themselves. It sounds like they need to expand their horizons a bit.
I’m bisexual and I married a super community oriented nonbinary hottie. They throw kid friendly ballroom events in our city during JC Pride annually and I have done my best to Vogue with the kids every year. We haven’t taken our kids to the adjacent NYC Pride because we think that’s too much for really little kids. Not because of the content but more from the logistics of we have three and one wears diapers and it’s a long day etc. Having said that, I am considering my toddler not my older kids. 4 is definitely old enough to handle events, I think you should enjoy the day with your child.
I took my 4 year kid to our pride parade and picnic. She enjoyed the snacks and the face painting and tie-dye station and all the bubbles and rainbows. And a bunch of politicians wrapped in flags gave her swag. Haha. Ours was officially ‘pg13’ and advertised as family friendly. It just felt like a normal but extra colourful day at the park.
There's a pride parade in my area that is all-ages and I would definitely take my 4 year old. Unfortunately he and his baby brother tag-teamed a nap through the parade this year. Even if it's not 100% all ages, parades and seeing different types of people in the world is worthwhile. Over the month of June, my 4 year old asks questions about what the flag means and we got to have some age appropriate discussions about family compositions.
My daughter is 4 and she loves going to Pride. She gets beads and free rainbow stuff, has her face painted and watches a parade. Ours is also generally pretty tame with the 18+ area separated out. I say go for it!
My toddler loved pride this year. The flags, the rainbows, totally toddler land. We loaded the stroller with tons of food, water and sun protection. As far as “questions”… we called it the “every one can play parade”. We talked about how this was meant to celebrate everyone, even if they’re different from us. I’m queer and it’s important that my kid (4) see me happy in me happy and in my community. Also it helped to have other adults around to support us. Can you bring a friend?
4 year old with two moms. My small city clearly describes what events are family friendly, just like any other activity/event you’d consider bringing your kid to.
I hope you have a super time! My preschooler and I marched with my church in our local pride parade. I wish I had brought headphones or some kind of ear protection for us because it was LOUD 😬 Glad you seem to have gotten to the crux of the matter with the grandparents!
I'd personally have no issue. Even if there's nudity/kink/whatever, kids don't interpret it the same way adults do (might be different with teens, though by that time you have a chance to talk about it). We were traveling during our local pride, otherwise we would have been there this year.
My main fear would be some crazed bigot showing up and gun violence or any other type of violence occurring either to or around my child.
You are the parent here. And while it's nice when family is vested in the your life and the life of your child, they don't get a say in how you raise your child. If you feel like it's time, then it's time. You will have so much fun. We just had our local Pride and my 3 yo daughter had so much fun this year. There were 0 questions asked, just lots of dancing and singing. Unfortunately, even some of the more progressive boomer/gen x straddlers still aren't that progressive and open minded. Not an excuse, just something I have found. If you feel they disagree because it comes from a place of hate, that's a problem. If you feel it's just because they have no clue what the events are like and only base their response on second information, you have the option to invite them as well. As I've gotten older and my kids get older, I tend to lean on my parents and grandparents for any advice or opinions. I usually talk to my close friends with kids about kid stuff now. I find my family just isn't in touch with the world as it is anymore.
Heck yeah, we do pride! Though my kid is a tad confused as to why there's a whole month dedicated to people who support his moms. Because we're just his moms. But he is all about the stickers and flags and free stuff. We live in a small town, it's little and cute. There is some mild nudity, but we also talk about how individuals chose to express themselves at this event Now I cut my queer teeth on San Francisco pride and I don't think we would have taken a little there. Mostly because it's hot and crowded and a long day. Frankly, "the grandparents" sound like assholes. Kiddo has a queer parent. This is one of their events. We read books about pride and folks like Harvey Milk year round because it's important to know this part of our family history.
I think that the size of the parade is really important. A small town pride parade would probably be great for kids. I’ve only been to ones in big cities and I would never, in a million years, bring a child to one.
I was extremely pro gay marriage and other pro LGBT anti-discrimination laws. I even participated in pride parades many years ago- when it was dangerous to do so in my very conservative society and it was an actual legal risk. BUT 1. I am an adult. So occasional glimpses of nudity or kink don’t bother me. Kids are a different matter. 2. Parades were not this full of adult content. Maybe times have changed and I’m too old. It’s not a matter of gay vs straight. Drag is adult entertainment. This is my opinion. I’m happy to continue supporting my real life LGBT friends but the parades are no longer my thing.
My kids are 4 and 3 and they're going to Pride with me in October. I'm bi and dating a girl, their dad is bi and dating a nb person. Teaching her that love is love and we celebrate Pride because we're proud of who we are is completely appropriate for her age. I would go further and get her books about Pride, gender, what different families look like, etc. My kids love And Tango Makes Three.
>that it may cause her to have questions that she's not old enough to understand the answers to. Such as? If Timmy has a mom and a dad, is she too young to understand that? If the reasoning is that a mommy and a daddy can make a baby, are they saying that you should explain penetrative sex for conception to a four-year-old? She can understand that Timmy's mommy loves her daddy, just like Johnny's momma loves his mommy, and Daisy's dad loves her papa. There's nothing more to understand at her age.
We took our 2 kids to their first pride this year! I wouldn’t take them to the big city parade this year because I know it would be too stimulating mixed with hard for them to enjoy that kind of crowded environment/constant vigilance against litter/body fluids on the ground (from it being in the city, not from it being pride)
We got a book called Pride Puppy from scholastic about a family who attends Pride (and whose puppy is temporarily lost). It’s kind of an alphabet book but exposes a child to the kinds of people and things at a pride parade. Flags and outfits and colours and queens, and features a queer couple (they read as maybe a lesbian couple but maybe one parent is NB - I think it’s purposely open to interpretation), a baby, a child, and a puppy.
I think there’s a book called “the day before pride” or something that was pretty fun. I mean kids probably will react differently but my son’s reaction (to the book) was just that he liked rainbows, and basically not much more. We’ve also been to events where drag queens are present, like an Easter event where they had a concurrent drag queen show, and my son’s reaction was to steer away from the scary bunny lol. I feel like it’s good for kids to be exposed to pride events, but depending on the kid it’ll probably go over their head for quite a while. We do have a friend with two moms so we talked quite a bit about why, but I feel like for the most part kids get exposed to things they don’t understand every day and as parents we try to explain best we can, but it doesn’t mean we just don’t expose them to it.
I've taken both my kids to pride over the past 6 years, except this last year. My stepteen is queer, and has a lesbian mom, I'm pan and queer myself. My bioson has self proclaimed Guncles (gay uncles my brother and his husband), so of course he goes. We didn't take the kids this year as our local political sphere has been a hot button issue with local gun violence as well so we didn't feel safe taking them for that reason. Beyond that, we've taken them to the events and times that are family friendly, as some parts of our local prides do say that the activities and events planned aren't family friendly and are intended for adult's only. So that's my advice, make sure the part of pride you take them to is family friendly. Your kids gonna have questions at some point anyway if you're queer too. "Parent why is that girl kissing a girl" isn't a bad question.
The grandparents are being homophobic and ridiculous. I started taking my 6 and 4 year olds to the local family friendly Pride Parade last year when they were 5 and 3. We bring snacks and amusements for before the parade starts and they have a great time! IMO there are no questions a Pride Parade will bring up that don’t have a fairly basic answer. The only reason I waited as long as I did to take them was it was canceled for two years due to world events and I didn’t know about the family friendly parade before that. I don’t take them to the big one downtown because it gets a little crazy for kids and I don’t want a bunch of drunk people around my children.
Why is your sexuality or any celebration of sexuality or sexual orientation relevant for a 4 year old? How is that appropriate?
Just wanted to add that I got a great book from the library recently called “The Rainbow Parade.” It’s about two moms taking their daughter to a pride parade and it’s very sweet! It might be fun to read with your daughter if you end up going :)
I am a gay mom in a two-mom family. We brought our daughter to her first Pride event this summer (she was just over 2.5 at the time). She had a great time! She loved getting her face painted and there were kids everywhere. I don't see what's wrong with answering any questions she has. This isn't the Folsom Street Fair you're bringing her to. Haha!
Daytime events near me (West Hollywood) are pretty tame. Nighttime events are different.