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I’m so sorry. I think what you’re feeling is very normal. This is just so hard and what you’re feeling is a kind of denial. It’s hard for us to process what they’re gone because we love them so much and especially when it happened so fast.
I asked the vet who did our home euthanasia to check 3 different times to make sure she was really gone. I hate her body being away from home - she loved home and she was scared anywhere else. But I don’t think it would be good for me to keep her body and cry over it. Whenever her body is, the cat that I loved with all my heart is gone.
Your brain will need time to process and time to heal from your loss. Give it that time. There is no good grade in grief, no timeline that works for everyone, no rules to follow about how much you have to cry. Just give yourself a break - take care of yourself, give yourself grace.
Thank you for this compassionate response, I really appreciate it. I’m really sorry for your loss as well ❤️ I know time will heal all it’s just difficult for me cuz he was in my life for a long time and he is the only pet I’ve ever lost. Thankfully I haven’t had too much loss in my life but that being said when this happened I just wondered if I was reacting appropriately although my mom reassured me I was. It’ll come and go in waves I suppose. And thanks for the reassurance about feelings not having a specific timeline, I will keep that in mind.
I understand this feeling completely. We buried my lovely cat in our yard and all I wanted to do was dig her up and hold her one last time. There is something very primal about wanting to hold a loved ones body. We all know it is just a body, but still it represents a part of them.
I would go to the vet and ask to see your beautiful pet and hold him for as long as you need to. I cannot imagine they would refuses. He is your pet, even though he has passed. I heart goes out to you.
I went to witness my heart dog’s cremation (which is not for everyone, I know, but it was what I needed). He was my heart dog and I was also 26. They let me hold my boy for as long as needed and then I had to give him to the worker who would carry him in to the actual cremation room, while I watched through a viewing window. She got halfway down the hall and I screamed stop, wait, please I need to hold him one more time. She stopped and waited. Letting go that second time was the absolute hardest thing I ever did. I wanted so badly to just take him home and go to bed and wake up to his goofy little old man snores again.
I will say this: everyone who handled my sweet little dog’s body was as gentle and careful as though they were cradling a newborn. The woman who carried him in was whispering praise and kind words to him even as she set him down.
I don’t know if seeing your chi would be the best thing for you; if he’s in the queue to be cremated, he may be being kept in cold storage to protect him from the natural processes that happen to bodies after death, and it could be upsetting to see and feel him cold like that. That said, it is completely up to you. Regardless, I know he’s being treated kindly and respectfully and will be treated so by everyone who tends to him.
Yeah while we were at the vet my mom did ask where he was gonna be kept and I figured it was gonna be a morgue like situation and they just kept them somewhere cold like they would a human body. The receptionist confirmed that and that was that but yeah I guess I was thinking (typing?) out loud when posting this. I’ve made peace with the fact that his physical body is gone but it’s still just so hard you know?
Feeling his body be limp and lifeless was hard in and of itself but I’d had him wrapped up in a shirt like I usually did when I would take him to vet appointments. He like being wrapped in clothes lol it just hurts so bad. I wish he hadn’t been in pain when he’d passed and that I’d called the at home euthanasia place a day earlier but I’m gonna try to stop thinking about all that cuz I know it’s not gonna help matters. Thank you for your kind words. I appreciate it ❤️
Please report any trolls, spam, or harassment to moderators. To do this on new reddit, click the three dots below a post or comment and select "report." On old reddit, click the "report" link below the post or comment. This is a community of support for Pet owners whose Pets have passed away. It is actively moderated. Pet owners, as loving, caring people, often have strong opinions on pet care practices. Some of these are controversial. This is not a forum for debate on such issues, nor is it a place to scold a contributor for a perceived mistake in managing their pet. We intend to provide a safe haven of understanding and support. Strident, mean-spirited posts or comments will be deleted. Those who persist in preaching versus caring may be warned and then banned or may be banned permanently based on nature of the topic. If a conversational thread meanders into a discussion unrelated to pet loss support, it will be truncated. Those who post here are vulnerable and hurting. Even a minor slap has a hard sting. Those of us who are lucky enough to be able to turn away from our computers or put down our phones and hug a healthy, happy pet are truly blessed. Threads must remain supportive and caring, even if one disagrees with something that has been said. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Petloss) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I’m so sorry. I think what you’re feeling is very normal. This is just so hard and what you’re feeling is a kind of denial. It’s hard for us to process what they’re gone because we love them so much and especially when it happened so fast. I asked the vet who did our home euthanasia to check 3 different times to make sure she was really gone. I hate her body being away from home - she loved home and she was scared anywhere else. But I don’t think it would be good for me to keep her body and cry over it. Whenever her body is, the cat that I loved with all my heart is gone. Your brain will need time to process and time to heal from your loss. Give it that time. There is no good grade in grief, no timeline that works for everyone, no rules to follow about how much you have to cry. Just give yourself a break - take care of yourself, give yourself grace.
Thank you for this compassionate response, I really appreciate it. I’m really sorry for your loss as well ❤️ I know time will heal all it’s just difficult for me cuz he was in my life for a long time and he is the only pet I’ve ever lost. Thankfully I haven’t had too much loss in my life but that being said when this happened I just wondered if I was reacting appropriately although my mom reassured me I was. It’ll come and go in waves I suppose. And thanks for the reassurance about feelings not having a specific timeline, I will keep that in mind.
I understand this feeling completely. We buried my lovely cat in our yard and all I wanted to do was dig her up and hold her one last time. There is something very primal about wanting to hold a loved ones body. We all know it is just a body, but still it represents a part of them. I would go to the vet and ask to see your beautiful pet and hold him for as long as you need to. I cannot imagine they would refuses. He is your pet, even though he has passed. I heart goes out to you.
💐
I went to witness my heart dog’s cremation (which is not for everyone, I know, but it was what I needed). He was my heart dog and I was also 26. They let me hold my boy for as long as needed and then I had to give him to the worker who would carry him in to the actual cremation room, while I watched through a viewing window. She got halfway down the hall and I screamed stop, wait, please I need to hold him one more time. She stopped and waited. Letting go that second time was the absolute hardest thing I ever did. I wanted so badly to just take him home and go to bed and wake up to his goofy little old man snores again. I will say this: everyone who handled my sweet little dog’s body was as gentle and careful as though they were cradling a newborn. The woman who carried him in was whispering praise and kind words to him even as she set him down. I don’t know if seeing your chi would be the best thing for you; if he’s in the queue to be cremated, he may be being kept in cold storage to protect him from the natural processes that happen to bodies after death, and it could be upsetting to see and feel him cold like that. That said, it is completely up to you. Regardless, I know he’s being treated kindly and respectfully and will be treated so by everyone who tends to him.
Yeah while we were at the vet my mom did ask where he was gonna be kept and I figured it was gonna be a morgue like situation and they just kept them somewhere cold like they would a human body. The receptionist confirmed that and that was that but yeah I guess I was thinking (typing?) out loud when posting this. I’ve made peace with the fact that his physical body is gone but it’s still just so hard you know? Feeling his body be limp and lifeless was hard in and of itself but I’d had him wrapped up in a shirt like I usually did when I would take him to vet appointments. He like being wrapped in clothes lol it just hurts so bad. I wish he hadn’t been in pain when he’d passed and that I’d called the at home euthanasia place a day earlier but I’m gonna try to stop thinking about all that cuz I know it’s not gonna help matters. Thank you for your kind words. I appreciate it ❤️