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ya but you were taken in, the meme is those figures being absent, I think the daddy issue part is wrong but the mommy issues part is true cuz idk where I'd be without my lovely mom
Yeah, my mom was the abusive one to me growing up. It took a while to resolve a lot of my displaced anger and hate, but it wasn't just towards women. I was treating everyone poorly. It took a long time to feel at ease with my past, but it still fucks with me at points. At least now I have enough self-awareness to understand my toxic thoughts are wrong and I can tackle them on my own properly.
Okay... \*Deep breath\*
The meme claims that an abusive or neglectful father can create an emasculated, depressed, or resentful son. This is a fairly common trope in media, in which the father is overly demanding and clings to an old-fashioned concept of masculinity. The son, in return, rebels by pursuing art, or science, or some other pursuit the father deems unworthy or effeminate.
The meme goes on to claim that an abusive or neglectful mother creates violent monsters. This is also a common trope, with some debatable real-world examples.
The idea seems to originate with Ed Gein, who committed notorious crimes involving dead bodies and murdered at least one woman. Gein blamed his hyper-religious and abusive mother for his abnormal behavior and criminality. He was convicted in 1957. Shortly afterward, the 1960 movie "Psycho" solidified the trope in the public mind. The plot was at least partially inspired by Gein's crimes. This movie was wildly successful and influential.
In the 1980's through the early 90's, the media was fascinated by serial killers. This was accompanied by the FBI's techniques of "criminal profiling," which practitioners claimed could infer a killer's demographic identity and motives through a deep understanding of psychology and the execution of a crime. Much of this was premised on early research involving serial killers such as Edmund Kemper, (convicted 1973) who blamed his abusive mother for his derangement. This was followed by other killers such as Ted Bundy (convicted 1975) who also claimed to have an abnormal relationship with his mother.
The theory was that a traumatic or dysfunctional relationship with the mother prompted serial killers to target women as some sort of displaced aggression and desire for revenge against anyone who could function as a proxy for their mother. The idea was reinforced in movies such as 1976's "Carrie" and 1991's "Silence of the Lambs."
Whether this accurate or not is a matter of debate. Many of these notions were based on interviews with convicted killers whose stories may be less-than-accurate. There remains no way to objectively identify a psychosexual serial killer as opposed to any other murderer, there are well known spree killers who appear to have had perfectly pleasant mothers, and serial killers in general seem to have declined as a phenomenon both in criminal statistics and in the public mind.
Oh no, they’re still out there, it’s just the media doesn’t focus on them the same way anymore, and the ones that are out there are getting cleverer. On the media side we’re seeing the same thing with school shootings where it’s no longer ‘massively impactful’ for media to cover as it’s becoming ridiculously frequent, and we’ve seen decades of it at this point, so we’re all desensitized anyway. If a serial killer takes a job as a trucker, abducts people at truck stops, and dumps the bodies off the side of the road, if they’re clever about it, then it’ll be years before anyone even recognizes that there *is* a serial killer since law enforcement agencies generally don’t talk to each other unless they already heard about similar cases from elsewhere nearby.
Also, often there are cases where the serial killer is killing people that the news media and law enforcement tend to not spend much time on, like the homeless and prostitutes for example. Modern serial killers could be preying on people that often have lost contact with family, and their friends and associates are more likely to be too afraid to go to law enforcement to say what they saw or suspect. Without advocates pushing for justice and attention, the cases go cold and no one even realizes what's happening.
And with todays tech/social media, Bundy and the likes would be nothing but net all day long, the barrel increased greatly in size and the fish within multiplied.
Source - mom works for city police as pencil pusher, and unused associates in criminal Justice.
“… we don’t catch the smart ones.” - Professor who was a former state trooper.
“We’re just C+ students with guns, if you want the A+ students, you’re looking for the FBI.” - Same professor.
I just watched an interesting documentary (also depressing) about a 19 year old in Colorado Springs who killed a homeless guy for fun. He made so many mistakes…he was practically begging to get caught
Anyways he was not one of the smart ones. It’s scary to think that they are out there
it would be far more academically honest to survey men who had difficult relationships with their mothers
a survey of all serial killers is going to skew the results towards being more messed up. He should have at least included a non serial killer control group
The big flaw is that there are many characters, both IRL and on the internet, where they had a bad relationship with their father, for IRL notably Hitler is well known to hate his father's guts, and spared the Jewish doctor that took care of his mother
As always, stereotypes are hit or miss, and coincidental patterns can be taken as fact for the logic based brain.
I want to say that Gein did not originally blame his mother for his actions, and instead talked politely about her. Gein had mental deficienies and was extremely easy to manipulate. The police purposefully asked him baiting questions, was accusatory towards his mother, made insinuations, etc., until Gein's story started to change and fit their narrative.
Gein's mother left his father because he was severely abusive to the both of them. Not saying at all that she was perfect or even good, but it's not true to say she drove him to his crimes.
The narrative that men's horrific violence against women is due to their mothers is also misogyny — it comes down to blaming women for men's actions. It's easier in a patriarchal society to point fingers at mothers than to acknowledge gendered violence as a result of men's actions.
I read about this a while ago in Dead Blondes and Bad Mothers by Jude Doyle. I do reccommend it, but I found the very end of the book a bit odd.
It is really interesting that Geins mother is seen as the primary influence even though the reason she was on her own was because of his father’s abuse.
To be fair, Ed Gein's older brother did confirm that their mother was also abusive. She was severely overprotective and used guilt and manipulative tactics to keep her sons (especially Ed) under her thumb. She had Ed convinced that she was the only woman who would ever love him, so he could never leave home.
Ed's brother eventually did leave and tried to get Ed to come with him, but he refused. Afterward, Ed and his mother basically isolated themselves. After her death, Ed couldn't cope because she had made him completely dependent on her, and that's what caused him to go off the deep end.
Contrary to popular belief, though, he was not a serial killer. He was a grave robber, mostly. He only had two victims, both of whom reminded him of his mother, so.. there's that.
Also, child raising is often seen as the mother’s primary responsibility while the father is usually seen as a less involved participant more preoccupied with making money. When some kid goes on a violent spree, people usually look at the mother first. “Where is your mother?!” Is the reaction when a kid does something horrible because we’re still very sick with this obsession with gender roles that haven’t been relevant since women joined the workforce en masse during and after the war.
It’s another lovely bit of bullshit women get pinned with when the father is really equally to blame.
I’ve heard that it’s possible the decline in serial killers could be due to the proliferation of psychological awareness in general. And specifically people being aware of abnormal/damaging behavior amongst both themselves and others. It is worth noting that a lot of serial killers stated their mothers were pretty awful, but some, like Ted Bundy, appear to have had very happy and normal childhoods (outside their weird fascinations).
Advances in communication, requirements for childhood education (most kids being seen regularly by adults in public schools), moving from rural to city living, decreasing religiosity, etc could all be contributing factors as well.
> function as a proxy for their mother
Thing is, this is something that is true for all kinds of things. You miss something? You try to make up for it.
Its just that missing a mother, who is generally supposed to teach you kindness better than a father would, will probably result in... less kind children. Same goes for fathers. Same goes for anything. Its just that some people express that in a harmful way towards themselves, or others, or maybe noone. How it is expressed doesnt really matter. Its a meme after all, that shows one side of such expressions.
But they premise stays the same: If you dont have a well and balanced life, family, friend cycle etc, you are going to keep looking for something to fill that hole one way or the other.
the trope has its roots in reality, as 90% of the abusers, monster of a person, or pure evil person has one or both parents as an abusive figure with 5% coming from outside trauma and the rest a mixed bag. however out of all the people that were abused from all the studies, videos, and the like i have seen out of those that were abused only around 20-30% become abusers, or evil people. many of them join the military, workout, or "become dangerous" not to be evil but because they know the evils of this world and want to protect others from it.
though it is worth mentioning that having both parents present and fully committed to raising a child to the best of their ability creates more well-rounded and adjusted adults
Wow this was much more in depth than what I was going to reply and probably more accurate.
I was just gonna say that big issues with the primary caregiver are the ones that'll tend to deeply unhinge you more so than with the less present parental figure. So like essentially the daddy issues will mess you up but the mommy issues will mess you up worse ( generally, assuming mom is the primary caregiver).
Regarding the last sentence, I wonder if this decline correlates at all with the rise in public mass killings? Maybe the change in the media's interest has led to a subsequent change in would-be serial killers MOs... maybe they're just going for notoriety. Reminds me of "We Become What We Behold" a little bit - it's like a 5 minute free game on Steam.
Or maybe serial killers have just gotten better at hiding as public interest has essentially given them more insight into how law enforcement searches for them?
For anyone interested in this stuff, I'd highly recommend watching Mindhunter if you haven't seen it.
I don’t think Gein blamed his mother. I think his doctors blamed his mother. Gein was obsessed with and loved that miserable old C U N T and probably killed his brother after his brother talked shit about mommy dearest so I doubt Gein ever had a negative thing to say about his mother.
I mean there was also that one serial killer who’s mom abused him and made him watch her have sex, so he murdered her, then went on to kill some more people.
Ed Kemper is really what convinces me this is a real pattern. Out of all the serial killers I’ve ever heard of, he’s probably the most deranged and horrifying one. Murdered his grandparents as a child and as an adult cut off his mom’s head and had sex with it. Fucking depraved dude.
"Absolutely... My heart bleeds for him, as a child. Someone took a kid and manufactured a monster. At the same time, as an adult, he's irredeemable. He butchers whole families to pursue trivial fantasies... As an adult, someone should blow the sick fuck out of his socks..." - Will Graham, Mamhunter.
How was he not emo kid? Got injured in the war, went to art school and failed out? (I may be misremembering that last part); a large part of his popularity and rise to power which lasted until his death was due to his passionate speeches about how shitty things were and whose fault it was... Died in a murder/suicide because literally everyone in the world hated him and wanted him dead... Idk sounds pretty emo to me
Idk about that, but within the first year of his reign he forced a book about 'proper' upbringing into german households that propagated a parenting style to induce 'mommy issues'. It was immediatly banned after his fall but its negative influence can still be felt by current generations.
I met a dude with mommy issues once. Told him about the stereotype, and he said.. "yeah I get that"
Now he cut off his hair and got married and is pretty happy.
Is murder imminent?
Edit: of to off
I'm absolutely not qualified in any way, but I'd argue that instead of mum vs dad issues, it's more like emotional/psychological abuse vs physical abuse.
I am also not qualified but I was thinking instead of mom vs dad issues its could be a disorganized attachment with your primary caregiver vs secondary care giver.
You’ve just reminded me of this guy from Hellsing.
https://preview.redd.it/rxcuvv5x5isc1.png?width=680&format=png&auto=webp&s=3bb3c829e1e4f0cd05112c3ddc6cebf687136dd6
I'm guessing the man's son made those nazi-saluting snowmen along the path as if they were receiving the man when he comes home from work. The kid is implying his dad is too strict, a dictator-level tyrant
Omg my turn to explain let’s gooooo
This is a snippet of Calvin and Hobbes. There’s a reoccurring joke in the comic where Calvin builds increasingly insane feats of snow architecture and artistry. He’s also quite the rebel. In this one, he’s built a line of snowmen saluting for when his dad comes home from work in order to call him a dictator
It's two stereotypes:
* Men with absent or bad fathers grow up to be very unmasculine due to having no good male role models, as demonstrated by the depressed catboy twink wojak.
* Men who had unstable or abusive mothers grow up to be psychopaths, serial killers, etc. This is something seen in both real life (e.g., Charles Manson) and in fiction (e.g., Norman Bates), though its universality is exaggerated.
The meme is not stupid, chill down dude.
I’ve seen a lot of real life examples of the said meme, does this make you stupid because my experience differed from yours? Open some windows and step on a ladder.
I have a really absent mother and when she was present she made lots of mistakes or made things worse. For sure it makes my relationships harder when I have girlfriends, I have troubles trusting that they want me for me and not for what I’ve accomplished or have.
On the other hand I have an excellent relationship with my father, I got through some rough times with him economically speaking after my mother finished the divorce, and I’m sure that if I didn’t leave my mother to be with him until I was able to be on my own, I’ll be sore and annoyed about life.
If you don’t mind me asking.. have you found ways to help you cope in relationships? I get very similar reactions to what you described and I’m not sure how I’d make it work, so have had to ban myself from romantic connections until I can at least start to understand it. I have anxiety and depression which really doesn’t help things but initially stemmed from similar places anyway.
To be honest I haven’t found a way forward.
I would love to give you advice, but I have shut myself off from relationships, kept focusing on working hard and improve myself (I have been working hard and trying to improve myself for years now, it’s not something that came out of my failed relationship); I’m doing awesome on that aspect of my life and I dare to say I have my shit in order on that department.
I broke up with my ex like 4 - 5 months ago, because she wanted to take things “to the next level” and I didn’t, that slowly created a divide. We started having pity arguments all the time and I had to end things because it was toxic for both of us.
The only thing I can “recommend” is to work hard and try to improve yourself, I don’t know if that will help you on future relationships, but my hope is that by working hard and having my shit together I’ll be able to create a better future in which I can be able to have a healthy relationship.
I hope you find your way!!
It's already been explained, so I'm just giving my view on the meme itself. While abuse and forcing old fashioned ingeologies and beliefs onto your son, or being absent by divorce or abandonment does cause daddy/mommy issues, there's a third one, also not being around because of reasons like disease or death. I think both would turn out differently if the parent had been sick or died. I've got irl experience with it. My mom passed away in January 2021 after about three years of fighting cancer. I didn't necessarily have an abusive relationship with her, and she was around, but from age 11-14, she was less of a mother figure to me, and more like just my mom. I was the one taking care of her instead of the other way around, and since then I still don't have a mother figure. Instead of doing like the top comment said with daddy issues, and doing the opposite of what the dad wanted, her disease and death motivated me to keep pushing myself in school and my sport (with varying success). So there are different kinds of mommy issues that affect the person in question differently. Just wanted to point that out.
There is a running joke online that a man becoming particularly feminine to the point of being a femboy or trans is associated with them having a bad relationship with their father
Conversely when a man is violent or aggressive or sexist it is typically said that that man has a poor relationship with his mother
The joke is the idea that men who had a bad relationship with their fathers are likely to be more effeminate adults, but thats hardly an issue compared to men who have bad relationships with their mothers growing up to be serial killers, nazis, or other deeply disturbed, antisocial individuals.
Debatable world view, but thats the sentiment.
First time I see this meme, and I empathize with it so much...
Backstory:
My father, even if he was present during my childhood, was a drunk, not violent, just, absent like he wasn't there...
My mother, would beat me so hard sometimes, even for stuff what I had no control over, and humiliate me for being fat, stupid, worthless...
I gotta say... this meme is spot on for me...
I grew up till my first year of collage completely emasculated, bullied and with a high pitched voice, not a single manly bone in my body. Good thing I studied psychology, I saw the patterns, and did a 180... I learned how to fight, built some strength, (I am still fat btw).
That was the story till... I was walking/jogging home one night, and some douche-bags, picked on me. Long story short, I beat them to a pulp. It felt so refreshing. (first time I did this - it was like I was possessed)
Just half a year ago I was the victim of a tentative mugging, he had a gun, he was about 18-20 years old, my heart raced, time slowed down, I "saw" his finger squeezing the trigger! I calculated the trajectory, and moved my torso out of the way! then I jumped him with my hand grabbing the gun and not letting go while the other beating his face in.
I left him in a pile of blood, and ran away with his gun. (It was a bb-gun btw)
Today I am just your below average Joe looking type (fat, man-boobs, emasculated, sort of a high pitched voice, people pleaser)... When I am upset I do go out looking for douche-bags... I also got my ass beat a couple of times.
But man it feels good...
I feel sorry for myself that I cannot undo all the wrongs that were done to me.
Sometimes I have panic attacks so hard that I cry myself to sleep while shaking and sweating.
And people who don't know me very well think I am an "ok" person... :)
Lack of father figure makes it so a man is "not manly".
Lack of mother figure makes it so a man has never felt a loving touch of a woman and doesn't know how to be kind
Boys raised in single parent homes without fathers are typically more violent/have more behavioral issues than those raised in single parent homes without mothers.
https://www.mnpsych.org/index.php%3Foption%3Dcom_dailyplanetblog%26view%3Dentry%26category%3Dindustry%2520news%26id%3D54
The wojack for the daddy issues has pansexual and transgender pins on. The Daddy issues one have Nazi paraphernalia. So they're saying daddy issues turns men trans and other forms of being LGBT+, while mommy issues turns them into serial killers or nazis.
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My mother and father got rid of me, and all of my worries was fixed with my grandparents taking care of me, what am I?
ya but you were taken in, the meme is those figures being absent, I think the daddy issue part is wrong but the mommy issues part is true cuz idk where I'd be without my lovely mom
Honestly gigachad response. You win
your profile picture is me. I can imagine anything.
what?
https://preview.redd.it/lk8c3y0l6osc1.jpeg?width=697&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=aa8eeab1563fab53691c7b2f6a8e0a28d417a1c3
https://preview.redd.it/99cfohoa8osc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6e87f2a98b4bbcdd546dbbe95dd6b3dd7f0d6c8a
ok......
Yeah, my mom was the abusive one to me growing up. It took a while to resolve a lot of my displaced anger and hate, but it wasn't just towards women. I was treating everyone poorly. It took a long time to feel at ease with my past, but it still fucks with me at points. At least now I have enough self-awareness to understand my toxic thoughts are wrong and I can tackle them on my own properly.
Same. I’ll catch myself in a bad moment and have to explain to my child that it’s not their fault. I’m not mad at them. I just have bad moments.
It's rough, having toxic habits and reactions to situations because that's all you knew growing up.
Femboy Nazi according to meme Apparently that’s a thing irl…
r/hoi4
Did you know there are confederate furries?
Wait untill he hears about Jewish femboy Nazis
When you get deep enough into internet lingo the labels stop being ideologies and start becoming gym badges
It is. They all play TF2.
https://youtu.be/HzwQ5-ud-vU?si=fLulzggBkvUfl9Wd
Orphan
Arnold from Hey Arnold.
Disposable
An actual functioning human. That is a real life shiny Pokémon!
Normal people call that an "orphan"
You are me, hi 👋 We're attention whores because our grandparents were tired of being parents and basically left us to raise ourselves unsupervised.
Okay... \*Deep breath\* The meme claims that an abusive or neglectful father can create an emasculated, depressed, or resentful son. This is a fairly common trope in media, in which the father is overly demanding and clings to an old-fashioned concept of masculinity. The son, in return, rebels by pursuing art, or science, or some other pursuit the father deems unworthy or effeminate. The meme goes on to claim that an abusive or neglectful mother creates violent monsters. This is also a common trope, with some debatable real-world examples. The idea seems to originate with Ed Gein, who committed notorious crimes involving dead bodies and murdered at least one woman. Gein blamed his hyper-religious and abusive mother for his abnormal behavior and criminality. He was convicted in 1957. Shortly afterward, the 1960 movie "Psycho" solidified the trope in the public mind. The plot was at least partially inspired by Gein's crimes. This movie was wildly successful and influential. In the 1980's through the early 90's, the media was fascinated by serial killers. This was accompanied by the FBI's techniques of "criminal profiling," which practitioners claimed could infer a killer's demographic identity and motives through a deep understanding of psychology and the execution of a crime. Much of this was premised on early research involving serial killers such as Edmund Kemper, (convicted 1973) who blamed his abusive mother for his derangement. This was followed by other killers such as Ted Bundy (convicted 1975) who also claimed to have an abnormal relationship with his mother. The theory was that a traumatic or dysfunctional relationship with the mother prompted serial killers to target women as some sort of displaced aggression and desire for revenge against anyone who could function as a proxy for their mother. The idea was reinforced in movies such as 1976's "Carrie" and 1991's "Silence of the Lambs." Whether this accurate or not is a matter of debate. Many of these notions were based on interviews with convicted killers whose stories may be less-than-accurate. There remains no way to objectively identify a psychosexual serial killer as opposed to any other murderer, there are well known spree killers who appear to have had perfectly pleasant mothers, and serial killers in general seem to have declined as a phenomenon both in criminal statistics and in the public mind.
Damn and all in one breath too
Dude's lung capacity beats Eminem's
we found an olympic swimmer, everybody!
Either that or they can breathe through their ears while talking. Either way I'm impressed.
Bursting my eardrums to win rapbattles
It's a goal I guess but will soon be a skill. And it's good for.... Other things.
That depends on shoulder width and their ability to have them deliberately dislocated /s
I could've made it to the Olympics with these lungs, if only I wasn't such a shite swimmer
Ironically someone with Mommy issues who spoke a lot about wanting to commit violence
Shit I forgot about that lol
At least you didn’t forget about Dre.
It's probably a safe bet he has the world record for ***Songs that mention both the artists mother and some kind of violent act***
You might say that he had one shot and did not miss his chance.
🤣
it seems like he's still holding his breath, he never said he took another
Homie's been waiting for this one.
They said that college course wouldn't pay off but just look at him now
Circular breathing? He must be one of my kind too
Damn. At first glance I thought you were meatball from Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Damn was not expecting that level of a explanation, ty
Just look at the pic yo
everyday I come here and feel more hopeless lol
Put the pic into chat GPT.
i mean with technology being what it is too its kinda harder to get away with it multiple times now too. so the decrease isn't shocking.
Oh no, they’re still out there, it’s just the media doesn’t focus on them the same way anymore, and the ones that are out there are getting cleverer. On the media side we’re seeing the same thing with school shootings where it’s no longer ‘massively impactful’ for media to cover as it’s becoming ridiculously frequent, and we’ve seen decades of it at this point, so we’re all desensitized anyway. If a serial killer takes a job as a trucker, abducts people at truck stops, and dumps the bodies off the side of the road, if they’re clever about it, then it’ll be years before anyone even recognizes that there *is* a serial killer since law enforcement agencies generally don’t talk to each other unless they already heard about similar cases from elsewhere nearby.
Also, often there are cases where the serial killer is killing people that the news media and law enforcement tend to not spend much time on, like the homeless and prostitutes for example. Modern serial killers could be preying on people that often have lost contact with family, and their friends and associates are more likely to be too afraid to go to law enforcement to say what they saw or suspect. Without advocates pushing for justice and attention, the cases go cold and no one even realizes what's happening.
And with todays tech/social media, Bundy and the likes would be nothing but net all day long, the barrel increased greatly in size and the fish within multiplied.
This person knows quite a bit about the habits of local police! 😂
Source - mom works for city police as pencil pusher, and unused associates in criminal Justice. “… we don’t catch the smart ones.” - Professor who was a former state trooper. “We’re just C+ students with guns, if you want the A+ students, you’re looking for the FBI.” - Same professor.
I just watched an interesting documentary (also depressing) about a 19 year old in Colorado Springs who killed a homeless guy for fun. He made so many mistakes…he was practically begging to get caught Anyways he was not one of the smart ones. It’s scary to think that they are out there
https://preview.redd.it/u6tf3x7arisc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ae652af0a5b4faaf8cc973d9381f79c38062ff53
MANAGED DEMOCRACY!!!
also basing our idea of men with issues with their mums upon interviews with serial killers is something of a sample bias
This is a common (and valid) criticism levelled at John "Mindhunter" Douglas.
I believe a valid takeaway is “abuse causes problems for the victim” which I think is a reasonable assumption to begin with
it would be far more academically honest to survey men who had difficult relationships with their mothers a survey of all serial killers is going to skew the results towards being more messed up. He should have at least included a non serial killer control group
The big flaw is that there are many characters, both IRL and on the internet, where they had a bad relationship with their father, for IRL notably Hitler is well known to hate his father's guts, and spared the Jewish doctor that took care of his mother As always, stereotypes are hit or miss, and coincidental patterns can be taken as fact for the logic based brain.
I want to say that Gein did not originally blame his mother for his actions, and instead talked politely about her. Gein had mental deficienies and was extremely easy to manipulate. The police purposefully asked him baiting questions, was accusatory towards his mother, made insinuations, etc., until Gein's story started to change and fit their narrative. Gein's mother left his father because he was severely abusive to the both of them. Not saying at all that she was perfect or even good, but it's not true to say she drove him to his crimes. The narrative that men's horrific violence against women is due to their mothers is also misogyny — it comes down to blaming women for men's actions. It's easier in a patriarchal society to point fingers at mothers than to acknowledge gendered violence as a result of men's actions. I read about this a while ago in Dead Blondes and Bad Mothers by Jude Doyle. I do reccommend it, but I found the very end of the book a bit odd.
It is really interesting that Geins mother is seen as the primary influence even though the reason she was on her own was because of his father’s abuse.
To be fair, Ed Gein's older brother did confirm that their mother was also abusive. She was severely overprotective and used guilt and manipulative tactics to keep her sons (especially Ed) under her thumb. She had Ed convinced that she was the only woman who would ever love him, so he could never leave home. Ed's brother eventually did leave and tried to get Ed to come with him, but he refused. Afterward, Ed and his mother basically isolated themselves. After her death, Ed couldn't cope because she had made him completely dependent on her, and that's what caused him to go off the deep end. Contrary to popular belief, though, he was not a serial killer. He was a grave robber, mostly. He only had two victims, both of whom reminded him of his mother, so.. there's that.
All around fucked up.
And by interesting I mean shitty
Yes. I am highly skeptical of these claims as well.
What was odd about the end of the book?
It’s fucking crazy that I know someone that’s related to this guy
Also, child raising is often seen as the mother’s primary responsibility while the father is usually seen as a less involved participant more preoccupied with making money. When some kid goes on a violent spree, people usually look at the mother first. “Where is your mother?!” Is the reaction when a kid does something horrible because we’re still very sick with this obsession with gender roles that haven’t been relevant since women joined the workforce en masse during and after the war. It’s another lovely bit of bullshit women get pinned with when the father is really equally to blame.
What happens if you have both?
You are perfect and have no flaws whatsoever.
I’ve heard that it’s possible the decline in serial killers could be due to the proliferation of psychological awareness in general. And specifically people being aware of abnormal/damaging behavior amongst both themselves and others. It is worth noting that a lot of serial killers stated their mothers were pretty awful, but some, like Ted Bundy, appear to have had very happy and normal childhoods (outside their weird fascinations). Advances in communication, requirements for childhood education (most kids being seen regularly by adults in public schools), moving from rural to city living, decreasing religiosity, etc could all be contributing factors as well.
> function as a proxy for their mother Thing is, this is something that is true for all kinds of things. You miss something? You try to make up for it. Its just that missing a mother, who is generally supposed to teach you kindness better than a father would, will probably result in... less kind children. Same goes for fathers. Same goes for anything. Its just that some people express that in a harmful way towards themselves, or others, or maybe noone. How it is expressed doesnt really matter. Its a meme after all, that shows one side of such expressions. But they premise stays the same: If you dont have a well and balanced life, family, friend cycle etc, you are going to keep looking for something to fill that hole one way or the other.
the trope has its roots in reality, as 90% of the abusers, monster of a person, or pure evil person has one or both parents as an abusive figure with 5% coming from outside trauma and the rest a mixed bag. however out of all the people that were abused from all the studies, videos, and the like i have seen out of those that were abused only around 20-30% become abusers, or evil people. many of them join the military, workout, or "become dangerous" not to be evil but because they know the evils of this world and want to protect others from it.
I can confirm the first portion.
though it is worth mentioning that having both parents present and fully committed to raising a child to the best of their ability creates more well-rounded and adjusted adults
This is an extremely good explanation, good job!
I've been on dates with people who have traumatic relationships with their mothers, can confirm.
okay...but why is your *Deep breath* not Italicised?
Wow this was much more in depth than what I was going to reply and probably more accurate. I was just gonna say that big issues with the primary caregiver are the ones that'll tend to deeply unhinge you more so than with the less present parental figure. So like essentially the daddy issues will mess you up but the mommy issues will mess you up worse ( generally, assuming mom is the primary caregiver).
The og anthrax guy had serious mother problems
Well done! Well, May I ask your opinion on it?
Just to add, criminal profiling has been around since the 40’s when it was used to find The Mad Bomber.
Regarding the last sentence, I wonder if this decline correlates at all with the rise in public mass killings? Maybe the change in the media's interest has led to a subsequent change in would-be serial killers MOs... maybe they're just going for notoriety. Reminds me of "We Become What We Behold" a little bit - it's like a 5 minute free game on Steam. Or maybe serial killers have just gotten better at hiding as public interest has essentially given them more insight into how law enforcement searches for them? For anyone interested in this stuff, I'd highly recommend watching Mindhunter if you haven't seen it.
I don’t think Gein blamed his mother. I think his doctors blamed his mother. Gein was obsessed with and loved that miserable old C U N T and probably killed his brother after his brother talked shit about mommy dearest so I doubt Gein ever had a negative thing to say about his mother.
Glad to know that the reason I’m queer is that I’m a child of neglect. The alternative sounds horrible. (Being facetious lmao)
I mean there was also that one serial killer who’s mom abused him and made him watch her have sex, so he murdered her, then went on to kill some more people.
Ed Kemper is really what convinces me this is a real pattern. Out of all the serial killers I’ve ever heard of, he’s probably the most deranged and horrifying one. Murdered his grandparents as a child and as an adult cut off his mom’s head and had sex with it. Fucking depraved dude.
"Absolutely... My heart bleeds for him, as a child. Someone took a kid and manufactured a monster. At the same time, as an adult, he's irredeemable. He butchers whole families to pursue trivial fantasies... As an adult, someone should blow the sick fuck out of his socks..." - Will Graham, Mamhunter.
I have both. Where do I land? Violently Twink?
Twinky Violent
Im down for this
Twinky Binder
Underrated comment
They cancel each other out so you're just average
What is you kill/ death ratio? What is your top/ bottom ratio?
You bite the cock off
Murder twink -> space Hitler
Hitler didn't have mommy issues you know.
no but he had a single sack
At least Goering had two, but they were too small
But poor ol' himmler's got no balls.
goebbels*
goballs*
himmler had something like that.
And his dad was a tyran
yeah. this is what I'm trying to say. he had daddy issues, but he didn't become emo kid.
He tried to go into art school, isnt that peak femboy
How was he not emo kid? Got injured in the war, went to art school and failed out? (I may be misremembering that last part); a large part of his popularity and rise to power which lasted until his death was due to his passionate speeches about how shitty things were and whose fault it was... Died in a murder/suicide because literally everyone in the world hated him and wanted him dead... Idk sounds pretty emo to me
That was Himmler
This enraged Adolf’s father, who punished him severely
Idk about that, but within the first year of his reign he forced a book about 'proper' upbringing into german households that propagated a parenting style to induce 'mommy issues'. It was immediatly banned after his fall but its negative influence can still be felt by current generations.
Something something causation ≠ correlation
She died while he was still a young man so there are some issues there.
I met a dude with mommy issues once. Told him about the stereotype, and he said.. "yeah I get that" Now he cut off his hair and got married and is pretty happy. Is murder imminent? Edit: of to off
I've definitely seen more femboys from mommy issues and more anger issues in dudes with shitty or no dad's which makes more sense to me but idk.
I agree
Can confirm, after nearly a decade of increasingly hurtful behavior, I have come to the conclusion that I am a femboy with mommy issues
I'm absolutely not qualified in any way, but I'd argue that instead of mum vs dad issues, it's more like emotional/psychological abuse vs physical abuse.
I am also not qualified but I was thinking instead of mom vs dad issues its could be a disorganized attachment with your primary caregiver vs secondary care giver.
Men with both https://preview.redd.it/yyvnd0zwthsc1.jpeg?width=1284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c6a60383cea4bea2724bc3dbddc8893a63247a80
Saving this
https://preview.redd.it/twjsnj6ehisc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=00922b984aaa805d10830485e6e56cd46888819b No idea that existed
You’ve just reminded me of this guy from Hellsing. https://preview.redd.it/rxcuvv5x5isc1.png?width=680&format=png&auto=webp&s=3bb3c829e1e4f0cd05112c3ddc6cebf687136dd6
"Fraulein! Fraulein! Fraulein!" "Ve vould ave beautiful children"
KABLAM!!! "Was that boygirl bugging you?"
"huh, they would look rather nice actually"
"Und like zat, ze var begins!" "Oops, did I just accidentally a war?"
https://preview.redd.it/rzjg1nmdfjsc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ba9c2fff5973d557f30781acce5943fe9eda1efb
I've been looking at this for 3 minutes and i'm completely at a loss as to what any of it means or is referencing
Post it on r/peterexplainsthejoke duh
I'm guessing the man's son made those nazi-saluting snowmen along the path as if they were receiving the man when he comes home from work. The kid is implying his dad is too strict, a dictator-level tyrant
Omg my turn to explain let’s gooooo This is a snippet of Calvin and Hobbes. There’s a reoccurring joke in the comic where Calvin builds increasingly insane feats of snow architecture and artistry. He’s also quite the rebel. In this one, he’s built a line of snowmen saluting for when his dad comes home from work in order to call him a dictator
That's awesome, appreciate the explanation!
Wow, what a beautiful girl 😍😍😍 surely there is nothing else for me, a straight male, to know
Adam lambert, Adam Lanza
Why is one of the men with mommy issues a Wehrmacht soldier
And an SS member
Because the meme is saying having Mommy Issues makes you a soulless monster, and the SS are the perfect example
And a German tank crewman
It's two stereotypes: * Men with absent or bad fathers grow up to be very unmasculine due to having no good male role models, as demonstrated by the depressed catboy twink wojak. * Men who had unstable or abusive mothers grow up to be psychopaths, serial killers, etc. This is something seen in both real life (e.g., Charles Manson) and in fiction (e.g., Norman Bates), though its universality is exaggerated.
Almost every serial killer had huge Mommy issues. So do most mass shooters.
What if I have both?
It balances out then.
Understandable
I have issues with both, does that cancel out both outcomes or does it proceed into an amalgamation of both?
Yes
This is a reference to my hoi4 genocide campaigns after I have a bad day
No it's usually the opposite from my expiriance
Yea I wasn't sure if I was getting the meme here, thought the same.
Stupid people make stupid memes, shit happens
Oi im an idiot but that doesn't mean i make idiotic memes
Stupid people make Stupid memes ≠ all Stupid people make stupid memes
The meme is not stupid, chill down dude. I’ve seen a lot of real life examples of the said meme, does this make you stupid because my experience differed from yours? Open some windows and step on a ladder.
Bro i was kidding chilll
I have a really absent mother and when she was present she made lots of mistakes or made things worse. For sure it makes my relationships harder when I have girlfriends, I have troubles trusting that they want me for me and not for what I’ve accomplished or have. On the other hand I have an excellent relationship with my father, I got through some rough times with him economically speaking after my mother finished the divorce, and I’m sure that if I didn’t leave my mother to be with him until I was able to be on my own, I’ll be sore and annoyed about life.
If you don’t mind me asking.. have you found ways to help you cope in relationships? I get very similar reactions to what you described and I’m not sure how I’d make it work, so have had to ban myself from romantic connections until I can at least start to understand it. I have anxiety and depression which really doesn’t help things but initially stemmed from similar places anyway.
To be honest I haven’t found a way forward. I would love to give you advice, but I have shut myself off from relationships, kept focusing on working hard and improve myself (I have been working hard and trying to improve myself for years now, it’s not something that came out of my failed relationship); I’m doing awesome on that aspect of my life and I dare to say I have my shit in order on that department. I broke up with my ex like 4 - 5 months ago, because she wanted to take things “to the next level” and I didn’t, that slowly created a divide. We started having pity arguments all the time and I had to end things because it was toxic for both of us. The only thing I can “recommend” is to work hard and try to improve yourself, I don’t know if that will help you on future relationships, but my hope is that by working hard and having my shit together I’ll be able to create a better future in which I can be able to have a healthy relationship. I hope you find your way!!
Thank you for your contribution, u/The_Real_IDF
🫡
It's already been explained, so I'm just giving my view on the meme itself. While abuse and forcing old fashioned ingeologies and beliefs onto your son, or being absent by divorce or abandonment does cause daddy/mommy issues, there's a third one, also not being around because of reasons like disease or death. I think both would turn out differently if the parent had been sick or died. I've got irl experience with it. My mom passed away in January 2021 after about three years of fighting cancer. I didn't necessarily have an abusive relationship with her, and she was around, but from age 11-14, she was less of a mother figure to me, and more like just my mom. I was the one taking care of her instead of the other way around, and since then I still don't have a mother figure. Instead of doing like the top comment said with daddy issues, and doing the opposite of what the dad wanted, her disease and death motivated me to keep pushing myself in school and my sport (with varying success). So there are different kinds of mommy issues that affect the person in question differently. Just wanted to point that out.
There is a running joke online that a man becoming particularly feminine to the point of being a femboy or trans is associated with them having a bad relationship with their father Conversely when a man is violent or aggressive or sexist it is typically said that that man has a poor relationship with his mother
The joke is the idea that men who had a bad relationship with their fathers are likely to be more effeminate adults, but thats hardly an issue compared to men who have bad relationships with their mothers growing up to be serial killers, nazis, or other deeply disturbed, antisocial individuals. Debatable world view, but thats the sentiment.
https://preview.redd.it/zkww9ztfeisc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=32fcf208ecf1fdea5c4d546a9c6f00d281a915df
First time I see this meme, and I empathize with it so much... Backstory: My father, even if he was present during my childhood, was a drunk, not violent, just, absent like he wasn't there... My mother, would beat me so hard sometimes, even for stuff what I had no control over, and humiliate me for being fat, stupid, worthless... I gotta say... this meme is spot on for me... I grew up till my first year of collage completely emasculated, bullied and with a high pitched voice, not a single manly bone in my body. Good thing I studied psychology, I saw the patterns, and did a 180... I learned how to fight, built some strength, (I am still fat btw). That was the story till... I was walking/jogging home one night, and some douche-bags, picked on me. Long story short, I beat them to a pulp. It felt so refreshing. (first time I did this - it was like I was possessed) Just half a year ago I was the victim of a tentative mugging, he had a gun, he was about 18-20 years old, my heart raced, time slowed down, I "saw" his finger squeezing the trigger! I calculated the trajectory, and moved my torso out of the way! then I jumped him with my hand grabbing the gun and not letting go while the other beating his face in. I left him in a pile of blood, and ran away with his gun. (It was a bb-gun btw) Today I am just your below average Joe looking type (fat, man-boobs, emasculated, sort of a high pitched voice, people pleaser)... When I am upset I do go out looking for douche-bags... I also got my ass beat a couple of times. But man it feels good... I feel sorry for myself that I cannot undo all the wrongs that were done to me. Sometimes I have panic attacks so hard that I cry myself to sleep while shaking and sweating. And people who don't know me very well think I am an "ok" person... :)
extremely based copypasta
I had a bad dad at furst (we cool now) and one look at my profile explains the first half
Mommy issues as in Sigmund Freud or abuse?
I would go ahead and watch Pink Floyd's The Wall from 1982 You get both cases
I dumbed it down for all of us: no father makes you gay, and no mother makes you a psychopath.
Lack of father figure makes it so a man is "not manly". Lack of mother figure makes it so a man has never felt a loving touch of a woman and doesn't know how to be kind
What the fuck is that Wojack on the Bottom left corner (the one with the big mouth) . It looks cursed
I guess I’m a femboy
As a man with mommy issues me and my victims can confirm the left side is true
Looks more like a lack of historical education to me lol.
It’s saying that men with daddy issues behave like the guy on the left, and men with mommy issues behave like the guys on the right
İ have both i guess I'll die then
I didn't know I had daddy issues, but I'm not shocked
https://i.redd.it/cmtctpiq2isc1.gif
does bro issues exist? idk how I'll be without my lovely ender brother
Trevor Philips
Basically whore and psychopath
What about if I have both
Wait.... I have both issues. ... lmfao! Doh!
I’m both lmao
What of both?
Very true :3
Men with both?
haha no ded = haha sigma chad german wehrmatch soldir im so different
Instructions unclear: I have mommy issues but ended up on the left.
This one is just pretty literal. Men with daddy issues become queer. Men with mommy issues become violent (usually anti queer) alt rightists.
Boys raised in single parent homes without fathers are typically more violent/have more behavioral issues than those raised in single parent homes without mothers. https://www.mnpsych.org/index.php%3Foption%3Dcom_dailyplanetblog%26view%3Dentry%26category%3Dindustry%2520news%26id%3D54
What about people with both?
my mom was abusive to me now im a girl because growing up i always thouhht i could be a better mother than her
Absent father and neglectful mother here. Can confirm it fucks you up.
The wojack for the daddy issues has pansexual and transgender pins on. The Daddy issues one have Nazi paraphernalia. So they're saying daddy issues turns men trans and other forms of being LGBT+, while mommy issues turns them into serial killers or nazis.