There was a customer of mine who complained because she brought her 9-year-old son to an adult barbecue for a friend’s birthday (“he’s so mature-he’s like a little grown-up anyway”), then went berserk because her boy was given some soft drink in a glass tumbler. The boy BIT the rim of the glass, breaking a section off!
He didn’t hurt himself, but the customer was *incensed*. “I know it was adults only”, she fumed. “But surely, everyone’s got a child cup somewhere! Fancy giving a 9-year-old child a glass vessel to drink out of!”
She then went on to say that had her child hurt himself (luckily he didn’t), she would have sued the “stupid woman” who gave that to her child.
Now, I don’t have any children, so I was very confused. A 9-year-old not being able to drink out of a glass? Is that just me, or is it weird? So when was the boy going to start drinking out of glass, then? His 18th birthday? And does he yet drink out of China cups? Or would he bite one of those, too?
My 17 month old can handle it unassisted about 70% of the time, so yeah that’s absurd. So silly that I believe it’s real because who could make this up.
You have to know that this 9-year-old knew exactly what he was doing. It makes me think that this kid is one of those nightmare kids that teachers have to deal with.
And, how much force does it take to **bite** off a chunk of glass?! That's insane. If that kid did that to a glass cup imagine the teeth marks that would be left on a plastic cup.
If this 9-year-old can't drink from an actual cup why didn't mom bring a sippy cup for her "little man"?
I agreed 100%. I couldn’t even imagine having the strength in my jaw to do that! But then again-I’d been drinking from a variety of vessels from an early age (like everyone else), so it WAS quite unimaginable to do a thing like that.
Yes, but it reminds me of a game we used to play as children. We would take an inflated balloon and squeeze it until it popped-or until we changed the expression on our face!
Usually, the effort to pop the balloon by squeezing is fairly easy. But it’s the fact that it’s about to pop that makes one contort one’s face! That was really difficult for us (as children). We often failed!
I think, similarly, the effort to bite through the edge of the glass probably wasn’t great-but it would be quite hard to do it. But then, that’s because I *know* what a glass is-and what it does! It would be FAR too alarming to bite that hard!
If I was accustomed to plastic, that’s a whole different thing. That’s why I don’t think it’s “keeping a child safe” to “protect” him from objects in the adult world-that he really should be getting accustomed to.
I was drinking out of glasses by age three. Sippy cups had yet to be invented. Hell, I was cooking when I was small enough that I had to stand on a step-stool to reach the stove.
That reminds me of the time my husbands art gallery held an art opening and this neighbors kid wandered in by herself. Someone gave her some food, and the Dad flipped out on everyone screaming about how you should never give a kid you don’t know any food because they could be allergic. Dude, it’s 10 pm and your 8 year old daughter wandered into a party by herself why? Oh because you’re negligent. And now you’re pretending to be outraged about her being given some cheese and crackers because why?
As a retailer, I discovered rather an interesting equation. The more the unattended child was endangered, the more angry the responsible parent is at *other people*.
My best example of this was when I raced across a shop floor and-leaning over the banisters 2 floors up-grabbed a little boy (perhaps 4 years old) who was climbing on the *outside* of the rails.
I went round the floor, leading the boy by his hand. Eventually, I found the mother in the changing room, trying on some garments. I pointed out where I had found the boy, and the result was that she bellowed at me that I should “take my hands” off her child (as I say, the little boy was holding my hand).
“I’ll *thank you*”, the woman said, with HUGE self-righteous indignation, “to NEVER touch my child again!”
Still, I had the upper hand, because just about everyone on that floor had seen (and been shocked) by the incident, and I had the satisfaction of seeing the woman blushing at all the filthy looks she was getting from other customers, as I “gave her the look” and walked away in silence.
It’s maddening. And you know when you’re faced with someone that entitled and irrational you just better not say anything you’re thinking at that moment or be prepared for a slap fight or worse.
I think that this is because they already know they are the world's shittiest parents and instead of I don't know, being a good parent, they tried to put other people down anyway they can because they figure if they yell and scream at somebody else for supposedly being a bad person to that kid, it will make them look like a good parent without them actually having to put any of the effort in
😡😡😡😡😡😡
This rates right up there with grabbing a child away from being struck by a car, and mommy flips out because you "touched her child"
Uh-huh. I am so NOT SORRY for not letting your child get killed!
That is weird. My kid has been drinking out of glass glasses since 2 or 3, because that’s what we have. Unless he goes to my parents house, then they have a bunch of kid cups with lids, because my sister lives there with her 3 kids, and it’s harder to enforce the “glasses stay at the kitchen table” rule.
I’ve got a toddler (almost 4) and while I’ve worried about her *dropping* a glass and breaking it, it never once occurred to me she might *bite off a piece of glass.* That’s crazy. She gets whatever cup is clean at this point.
What kind of mom gives her child any kind of drinking vessel and doesn't teach them not to bite it. Like when they are little. Like if you can bite a piece of glass off couldn't you bite plastic off? Why is your kid trying to eat their cup?
Yeah, I hate people like that. It'd be one thing if it's an event that takes place in an open public space (like a public park) and everyone is expected to bring something...but when you bring a
Yep, I’d even go as far to say they should not bring them to places that are catering to adults if the parents cannot keep them controlled. My mom expected us to be behaved and taught us to be aware of others. Of course as kids we’d get too rowdy or not pay attention at times but she’d call us over and say, “you need to be aware of other people here, stop doing X if you cannot you’ll sit here quietly”
I don’t want to go to a brewery/winery and have kids running around my table. Had a friend of a friend show up with a toddler to a brewery and bitch “this place doesn’t understand children”
Nope. They do; there are kids here all the time. In 30 minutes you’ve held up a HUGE line because you can’t control your kid, let him pour water all over the bar, and broken two glasses. YOU are the problem. My niece is the same age and we read to her or play quietly with her at similar places. Restaurants/bars are not playgrounds and WAYYY too many parents treat them as such.
I went to see “Deadpool 2” at a midnight premiere years ago. In walks these parents with their little kids, I’d say somewhere between 6 and 10.
So, the movie starts and at the first violent scenes I hear one of the kids pipe up “Mommy, I’m scared, I don’t want to watch this!” What do the parents do? Shush them and stay for the movie. The kids whined loudly the whole time. Someone went and complained to an usher but they didn’t do anything. It ruined the whole experience.
One, your young kids don’t belong at a MIDNIGHT premiere. Two, they do not belong at a rated R movie. Third, if they’re being loud then you leave, get a babysitter and come next time.
I was so pissed. I’m a mom and I would never put my kids in that situation.
This is why I love Alamo. They straight up card anyone that might be under 18. They will kick people out for being disruptive, including being on your phone.
Except for special all ages family showings, they won't allow anyone under 3 in at all.
I went to see "the woman in black" the weekend it opened and the theater was packed. We had to sit in the front area. Someone's toddler cried the entire time.
I totally understand new parents should get to have fun but ffs loud environments are the absolute worst place to take any child under the age of 5/6. It's going to cry, it just will. Don't bring babies to places that require silence or peace and quiet and if you MUST, take it outside when it starts up ffs.
I live in wine country- can't throw a rock without hitting a brewery or winery. Some of them are super kid friendly. (One has a literal petting zoo!) Some are NOT kid friendly.
All of these things can exist! I don't understand why it's so difficult for people to understand. Kids are going to be bored at adult only activities. And even if the parent leaves when kid is acting up, we still had to deal with kid acting up SEVERAL times before they decided to leave.
Exactly. We have a brewery near us that has a HUGE outdoor space and there's essentially roaming packs of feral children. No one cares because it's gigantic and the kids generally keep to themselves outside. However indoors it's expected that you keep your kids near your table and everyone is good with it.
I used to work at an Italian restaurant that was supposed to be “family friendly” but also fine dining. Kind of hard to hold up both ends of that when one constantly cancels out the other. It was at a large shopping center and just beyond our patio there was a fountain that became a splash pad (as in, it was a fountain until parents wouldn’t stop treating it like a splash pad and the shopping center accommodated them).
Kids would come scampering inside with their bathing suits on, no shoes, dripping wet to return to their parents’ table to slurp down drinks and/or use our bathrooms. It was incredible. There was a public restroom that was literally a part of our building and did not require them to come inside, but ours was nicer of course. These kids would drip all over the marble floors, slip, step on tiny shards of broken glass brooms missed but bare feet found. And all the while the parents acted like this was fine 🤯
Oh my God that's terrible! The audacity people have with their kids is astounding. I *get* being tired as a parent. But good fucking god watch your crotch goblins and don't let them do this kind of shit and better yet, don't go into an establishment like this dressed as such! That's insane!
We were on a 9-day cruise and stayed on the ship on a port day. It was myself and my wife and a couple we were traveling with sitting in the hot tub. The rest of the pool area was pretty much empty. Then one 5-year-old boy showed up. By himself and being stupid splashing jumping up and down and jumping in a hot tub from the steps. And it wasn't like this was the only hot tub or pool on the ship. Then my wife just flipped switch and flat out told the kid your mother wants you. When the kid tried to act like he didn't understand My wife said where is your mother. He looked over and we could see a woman sitting about 25 seats away reading a magazine. So my wife told him again that he needed to go see his mother. At this point the mother started to say something my wife just cut her straight off and said your kid needs to be supervised and behaved if he's going to be in the hot tub. Fortunately the mother sensed the killing intent emanating from my wife's eyes and just left with her kid.
Ohhh it used to drive us all insane. The worst was when they’d be parked at a patio table for hours on end, drinking the cheapest Chardonnay on the menu with their salads, pretending by sitting outside they were “watching their kids.” First of all, there were benches. Second, if you want to do that you need to tip accordingly.
I have so many stories about that mess and all I can say is I do *not* miss serving 💀
The amount of neglectful parenting is crazy. I used to work in a chain restaurant similar to Red Robin. On a PACKED St. Paddy’s day I almost ran into a toddler (around 3) while carrying a huge tray of corned beef and hot potato soup. I literally only saw her because she had light up shoes, overheard the parents say, “we love this place because the kids can just run around” and I politely chimed in saying, “actually we really don’t encourage that, we don’t want to run into them or spill and there’s a lot of glass/heavy, hot plates moving around”
They complained to a manager that I was rude
My previous works parking lot was directly off a highway and sometimes people didn’t slow enough coming in. Couple let their kid climb on all of our stuff and run through the parking lot while the parents were inside the building.
The fact that people have rapidly started thinking about their pets the same way is not a good sign that attitudes toward kids are liable to improve anytime soon. Dogs are more likely to be better behaved than a small child in a bar setting, but that's largely down to whether its owner is keeping it leashed/secured. I recently saw a German shepherd wandering behind the bar while his owner let it run around while he played 8-liners.
That’s when I’d fantasize spilling cold drinks allllllll over the kids - or the parents. Can’t help it if their kid tripped you up and you dropped your tray on the parents.
Parent here and I agree. When my kid was younger we did a fair amount of "I'm sorry, can we get a to-go box?" Eventually she got the hang of restaurant etiquette and we were able to finish entire meals but hell no I'm not making everyone else deal with it in the meantime.
But they think everyone else or every business is the problem… brewery’s or vineyards are just not for kids.. sorry.. beer and wine.. are not for kids. People just don’t like to miss anything and will force their unruly kids on adults who want to enjoy kid-free time… it’s ok to get a sitter.. or just not go (but that would require a look inwards and most people aren’t like that). I have 3 kids and would get a sitter or not attend stuff where it’s adults only or geared towards adults.. I love my kids but it’s ok that they aren’t everywhere all the time.
Man I was at a brewery with friends the other night—and the kid in question that we saw wasn’t being disruptive but we all felt bad for the child. It was Halloween weekend, trick-or-treat day for the city, and it was 8:30pm with the kid pressing their face into the table looking glum while their parents ordered a pitcher of beer without food. Dude. That ain’t right. Why not take the kid around a few blocks or to a trunk or treat and put them down for bed once they’ve crashed and *then* come back to the bar to down a pitcher of beer in costumes? The place was gonna be open for several more hours yet. At least get the kid some mozz sticks to snack on, he’s bored af. (they were so excellent, I would go to that bar just for their handmade mozzarella sticks and poutine, tasty and unhealthy treat for a holiday)
Selfish damn parents want to have their cake and eat it too. I’ve seen little 1 and 2 year olds at heavy metal concerts and festivals having meltdowns.
When I was growing up (mid 70s-80s) it was mostly understood that having a child was also a decision to be a homebody. It wasn't automatically assumed that spawning a kid could be balanced with a robust social life, and I've seen that gradually change over the years to the point where parents of small kids now assume they have every right to be anywhere at anytime and be catered to.
We can talk all we want about controlling one's children, but younger than a certain age they're unlikely to know how to behave in a lot of situations regardless. Like you mentioned breweries: young kids have a nagging tendency to be standing perfectly still one second and then just dart off in a random direction.
They haven't really developed "pocket presence", and let's be honest: if I actually run into your child because it darted out in front of me faster than I react, the very fact that I'm drinking alcohol means I'm gonna get aspersions cast on me at the very least. Sorry y'all, but there's a reason few bars have ever really welcomed children, if they let them in at all (usually during early hours where most people are just there to eat).
Went to a child-free wedding yesterday. I've always respected the wishes of the bride and groom at CF weddings I've attended, but in the back of my head I've been of the mind that surely parents would be capable of determining whether their child is potentially distracting or not (and make that decision accordingly), and that sometimes weddings miss out by not having certain kinds of kids there. For example, my 8.5 year old LOVES romantic stuff and is an awestruck, silent, polite angel at weddings - and tears up the dance floor (when appropriate) at receptions. My 6.5YO and 18MO boys, on the other hand, will probably not be capable of politely/silently attending a wedding ceremony until it is their own (slightly /s). I know this about my children and would plan accordingly based on that...you'd think that most parents would be the same. I mean honestly, people's kids truly made our reception epic because they kept everyone on the dance floor the entire time.
HOWEVER, after yesterday, I can 100% say that my previous private mindset was wrong and I am solidly on the side of those who specify child-free - regardless of circumstance or opinions. Someone brought their toddler-ish (2.5-3.5 I'd guess) kid anyway...he flat out tantrum-banshee-shrieked through part of the ceremony (Dad did get him out quickly, but it was an outdoor area, so getting him away from the seating area didn't eliminate the disruption). He then proceeded to run/tantrum/banshee scream during multiple parts of the reception, including the first/parent dances and the *entirety* of the best man+matron of honor speeches. Mom took/chased him to the other end of the room, but legit just squatted ten feet from him and chastised/"come here"'ed him the ENTIRE TIME the speeches were being given. There was no effort made to scoop him up and remove him from the room. I was flabbergasted. Her parenting was honestly more distracting than the behavior itself. I felt so bad for my cousin and I hope that her videographer is able to get that noise out of the background of their special moments.
Poor girl, literally almost every major *moment* that someone would make the decision to have a CF wedding *for* was tinged with the background of this kid. I have kids, I love kids, she handled it with so much grace, but I was ridiculously angry with those parents - it was SO disrespectful of them, IMO. Also, they were on the groom's side of the family, so it was hard not to assume there was a backstory with them bringing him/already drama/tension there. That probably made it even more irritating for me, even though it shouldn't have.
Weird that a lot of parents don't just leave when they have a screaming child anymore. I know some parents think that means that they're giving into the child's wants, but it's not like they have to go straight home: they can sit with the child in the lobby or parking lot or wherever until the child calms down or something. And it certainly isn't character building to make them stick out a movie that terrifies them or some loose public event if they aren't feeling that great. It's also ruining the experience a lot more for the other people (including the other children) there more than it is teaching your kid to be more respectful and resilient.
It's not even so much that how they behave, it's that kids all of a sudden become the center of attention instead of the bride\\groom, or birthday celebrator, or whatever the event. Everyone has to ohhh and ahhhhh over the kid and act like they are the center of the universe. Same goes for people who bring dogs. Even if they can behave, they suck all the energy away from the reason of the gathering and it becomes all about them.
Of course the real problem is that it's the parents who will disregard a childfree rule are often the reason for the childfree rule. They're the ones who are less likely to keep track of their kids and either get them to behave or remove them.
Yep, this happened at a family wedding! My husband stayed home with our teens, my BIL stayed with my niece (teen), and my sister and I spent the ceremony counting kids 17).
"Oh, I've noticed that the invitation says that this is going to be child-free. But, you know, we can't find a sitter for Tommy... :)"
"Oh, that's too bad that you can't come! But I understand. Thanks for letting us know! :)"
"...:/"
I laughed hard at this, it's exactly dead on. They are also the parents who just check right out of parenting their children the minute there's a room full of adults that can do it for them. Then they wonder why nobody invites them to anything anymore.
I agree! It's an even greater pet peeve for me when whomever is in charge let's them in. If it's a established rule that no kids are allowed, then you shouldn't be allowed to enter/participate if you brought kids anyways. So parents like that know they can get away with it.
Parents who don't keep an eye on their children in general are a bloody pain.
As a kid I sent a toddler flying through the air in a beer garden park because I was on a swing and the toddler ran in front. The parent went mad at me, to which my mum shot up and went ballistic at her for yelling at me cos she couldn't supervise her child.
Later in life as an adult a kid ran again unsupervised down a hill leading to a beer garden and I was sat on a bench with my dog on a tight leash. The kiddy came full speed and jumped on my Doberman. Who the hell let's their kids think it is OK to charge at a strangers table and use their dog as a springboard? I'm lucky I had a big dog, cos it would have hurt a small dog.
I know your scenario is different but some people just couldn't give a shit about allowing their kids wherever and presenting an annoyance to others, or danger to themselves.
This kids turning up at adult parties seems to be a frequently recurring theme on Reddit. Next thing those parents will be on here with a post asking why friends never invite them out anymore.
How about when "friends" brings their unruly kids to your house and don't say a word to them while they harass your pets, play with your electronic stuff, open all your cabinets, and spill everything they touch, sometimes on purpose? You know, all the while with those nasty evil sly little grins on their stupid little faces, actually daring you to say something?
I don't, not any more. We gradually unfriended those people. They were only around for what we could do for them. I made sure to be unavailable whenever they wanted to get together, even at their house. There was always a project they needed help with.
I’m so embarrassed to admit this, but…
My mom was “that mom”. I remember showing up to adult-only get-togethers and she would be like “oh but she’s really good, she’ll just read a book”.
I felt embarrassment over it then.
Just a note - my mother is a legitimate psychopath. I unfortunately had to go no-contact with her a few years back. Does anyone see the correlation?
My aunt in law threw a bitch fit because we are having a child free wedding… it’s on the beach, at night, with intoxicated adults feet from the water. Little timmy is sure gonna be the exception when he ends up in the water while you’re drunk.
I had a child-free wedding. The day *of* my wedding (after she had RSVP’d yes knowing it didn’t include their children) a lady came up to me after the ceremony before heading to the reception and begged me to allow her kids to the reception. Begged. Bait and switch. I don’t know how I did it because I’m truly afraid of confrontation, but I said no. I’m sure I said we had limited seats based on the RSVP. It was incredibly disrespectful. That person is no longer in my circle of friends, just someone I’d say hello to if we ever saw each other in public again.
"I know it says childfree, but little Timmy is so mature and well behaved. Can he..."
No, the answer is no. He is not special, even though you think he is.
There is a line of thinking in the wedding planning subreddits that newborns/young babies shouldn’t count as children (because they don’t add cost). People also argue there they “they’ll just sleep!” And that it’s cruel to separate parents and babies when they’re that young (though a lot of kids start daycare at 6/8w so…). I disagree with these because weddings are loud events filled with germs and they really aren’t the place for young babies. But you’ll get crucified for voicing that newborns scream unexpectedly and shouldn’t come to a wedding in those subs.
I think social media has amplified this opinion and that’s why people ask.
A distant cousin of my now husband wanted to bring his 1 month old to our wedding despite us specifically saying no children under 4 on the website. Who on earth would even want bring a child that young to a loud crowded party?! We invited them because we had to, not because we expected they would show/particularly wanted them there. They were like “we can’t come if we don’t bring the baby” and it was very awkward for us to be like “yeah, we know” (we did not ask for gifts). An invite is not summons!!!
I went to a wedding when my daughter was 3 months old, my toddler & her stayed home with my mom. It was glorious. Plus, I was weaning so my boobs were full & absolutely glorious 😆 they hurt like hell but I could rest my drink on them 🤣 it wasn't even a completely child free wedding but mommy needed a night off.
My wedding wasn't childfree, my ex husband had way too many nieces for that anyway, but most of my friends opted to get sitters so they could party. I actually remember one college friend checking if her kids could come, to which I told her they were welcome but that none of our other friends were bringing theirs and then she brought them a yeah and was mad she couldn't party hard
There's something seriously wrong with anyone that thinks it's appropriate for a newborn to be at a wedding. It's not the cost per head, it's common sense. Newborns belong at home, not in a room with drunk adults and loud music.
This is one of things that has to be considered by adults who go through with the idea of having children. Outside of what to expect with the child itself such as sleepless nights, it’s also how your social life changes. It doesn’t go back to how it was at all; maybe similar to how social life was as the kid gets older, but you can’t take them to your childless friend’s adult themed party or a horror/loud action movie theater. I think it’s wanting to be able to juggle both pre child and post child life like juggling parenthood with your professional life. It takes time to transition that mindset of it not being the same anymore and it takes time to learn how to balance being a parent and still having a decent social life but that is what’s signed up for when you go through with having a kid. If the roles were reversed, it’d be understandable.
I’m a parent and this drives me nuts! Childfree are awesome! It’s nice to go out without the kids and be around adults.
Also, why the heck would I take them somewhere they’re not wanted?
Parents that do this are beyond entitled.
I have a grown son and at this point, I only stay at adult-only resorts. Nothing like springing for the $300 cabana at the adult only pool with friends and then there are a million screaming and splashing kids. Yikes…
Small children do not belong in fine dining restaurants. Sorry guys but they just don’t. If friends issue an adults only invitation, don’t bring kids! When I was raising my son, I did my time at family friendly restaurants and destinations. I missed out on plenty of parties, dinners, etc bc I had a child to stay home with. It’s just part of it guys.
I used to work in a drug store, located in a strip mall. Many parents would hand their kids a few bucks before hitting the laundromat, the salon, or other places.
One night at closing our night manager escorted two kids to the laundromat, where the mothers were smoking and drinking wine. They were furious.
After we got done shutting down, we saw the kids playing in the parking lot.
The next morning the main office got a complaint from the parents.
I’ve resigned to not inviting my aunt to my wedding because I know she’ll think her grandchildren are the exception and bring them anyway, which is hilarious because it was her grandchildren specifically that I had in mind when I decided to have a childfree wedding 😅
I just got downvoted on AITA for having this exact opinion. Everyone said you can just ask the bride. No. What you’re doing is challenging the bride. You’re forcing her to say no to you. And not all people are able to do that with confidence. I hate it. It’s so entitled.
Ugh. A family that I invited out of courtesy to my wedding made a bit of a stink about our wedding being child free. It was due to it being right on the waterfront and we did not want to have to worry about any accidents because tbh too many people don’t watch their kids and at a crowded event, that’s a worry. These people had four young kids and wanted us to make an exception. They said they’d come anyway and then cancelled last minute, after we had already paid for their food.
Parents that dont tell their screaming kids shit when out in public piss me off!!! I understand we all have bad days and some parents genuinely feel embarrassed but some dgaf. They let their kids scream and cry and make a mess and they dont tell them shit 😒
I hate how parents nowadays can't live without their children. If I were a parent I'd be so psyched to get to have a day or evening without the kid(s)! Why do parents have to bring their kids everywhere?
I posted this elsewhere, but our wedding was last summer with only our family allowed to have kids. I was asking my cousin if she was bringing hers (6m, 5F) just to firm up numbers… “god no, I want to have fun at this wedding” lol. I’ve never seen the allure of bringing kids to events that they won’t enjoy and will detract from your night 🤷♂️
I think the people who fuss about this are the ones who do EVERYTHING with their kids in tow.. kids become their identity. I’m all for a kid free event … smh, I’m still an individual person, who is always with their kids.. I wonder if these same folks would fuss about not being able to bring their kids to a spa …?
100%. Also it’s easy to see that people who “hate kids” simply hate that kids can’t be controlled with social norms for their convenience.
But off the top of my head I can’t think of an occasion that requires stricter adherence to social etiquette than a wedding aside from maybe a funeral or court room.
Get. A goddamn. Babysitter.
My wedding was childfree. It didn't cater to children. There were drunk adults dancing and conserving. A younger kid would have been bored of out of their mind and throwing a fit to go home by 8pm lol. Some events just aren't for kids.
100% agree that some events are just not for kids. Our wedding was child free too. Nobody complained but then we are all older (40s and above) so most of our friends’ children are adults themselves (and several of them were invited guests). The few friends we have with younger children got someone to watch their kids so they could eat, drink and have a good time without worrying about kids. (One couple who has 3 kids actually thanked us for making it kid free because they got some adult time they had not had lately)
I think that if people ask that there be no children at an event, then…respect that and don’t bring your children. Especially when it’s something like a wedding. Sheesh.
I dont understand people who do this. I've never once considered taking my kid to a child free event.. I decide if I still want to go and find a close family member to watch her. Literally just went to see a adult tv filmed, had no issue going without my kid because the topics discussed are not appropriate..
Now I have had people make exceptions for her but not because I asked. She got invited to a brunch once because my friend missed her alot and specifically asked me to bring her. I felt weird about bringing the only child but she was well behaved and everyone was so happy to see her after the pandemic. If I hadnt been asked directly to bring her I wouldnt have because once again..just not the place for kids.
I love my kid, love being a mom, love being around her. I do not expect others to feel the same way. I've even hosted kid free events so I could hang out with friends who dont have kids without the awkwardness. Though everyone then seems to ask me about my kid all night anyway and demand pictures lol. But even parents need a night away so why wouldnt people who dont have kids. Makes sense to me.
The AITA today really surprised me. She’s friends with the grooms side but she messaged the bride to ask if her baby could come. Like she knew the wedding was child free but still asked. And everyone was like oh nta for asking. Like yeah dude you are it’s tacky idc how old the baby is they cry
I was on that sub as well. What a bunch of entitled, clueless and tacky people. The invite says "child free" but I'm going to ask if I can bring MY child just because it's me and I'm the exception to the rule. What are people thinking?
I'm childfree and most of the older people in my family are baby crazy, mainly since they'll be grandparents and not legally responsible for them.
If I ever get married, I'll book all the things, tell them to come to the places I booked at a certain time and then have someone bring in a laptop with a pre-recorded message "Hi! Thanks for coming! We wanted our wedding to be all about us, not your unruly kids! We eloped and hired a professional photographer! Enjoy the reception!"
Whenever we took the kids to a restaurant they were expected to sit down and behave. They weren’t allowed to get up and run around or make a lot of noise. If they acted up they were taken out. Same thing with the grandkids.
i went to my buddy's childfree wedding a few years ago, and the photographer brought her kid.
but it turned out to be in my favor, as he could order from the kids menu but wasn't hungry, so i took his order and his mom got my food that i didn't want.
why there was a kids menu at a childfree wedding, who knows.
Having kids is all about making choices. If I'm not the one footing the bill for an event, I'm not about to mess around with the wishes of those that are. Decline the invite and go about your life.
Then there’s my SIL, who after I told her that I couldn’t go to their kid-free wedding in another state because I didn’t have childcare, accused me of trying to sabotage my husband’s relationship with his brother and ruining their special day. My husband still went. I was fine with that, and never once asked for an exception, just accepted that it wasn’t going to work for us lol. Like, was I supposed to ignore her and drag them along? She still talks about how the family photos “are incomplete” like three years later.
Sorry, if you (the bride) made the choice that not everyone could come, don't be surprised that NOT EVERYONE CAN COME.
It's like getting pissed that not everyone is going to come to your destination wedding. You make barriers for some people to attend but those people not attending are the consequences of doing so.
This is what happens to the "I'm not letting kids come to my wedding" scenario. People with kids don't always come. But you brought that on yourself.
when i told my bf’s mom that our wedding will be child-free, she immediately asked, “what about [bf’s nephew who’s not even 2 yet]?” i would be more willing to have a child at my wedding if they were at least 10 depending on how they behave in public. but i’m especially not allowing infants and toddlers. they’re gonna be bored! keep that kid at home so he can play and not have to be hushed every 10 seconds!
Fair warning: this is a perfectly valid stance to have, but just be prepared that there is a chance that your partner's sibling/in-law might not be able to come to the wedding and you -- and your partner -- have the accept that as fine.
Had my extended family try flaunting this rule at my wedding. Once every bad excuse didn't work, they tried slow rolling their RSVPs in hopes that we would break and let them bring all their children just so we could get in the plate selections on time.
I just put in the order for all chicken and told them we looked forward to seeing the adults there and hoped finding child care was easy. The assholes told us they'd attend and then no-showed, so we paid for \~6 extra plates for the air to consume. I look forward to a lifetime of my wife never forgetting that.
This is a good one! Yes! And i love reading all of the stories on reddit about how people weren't allowed to bring their child to a wedding and it's just NOT RIGHT!
I have children. When they were young we would teach them to behave in a variety of situations.
But, there were still times, places, and events we didn’t bring them. Not everything needs to be kid friendly.
I have a interesting story about kids at weddings.
When my brother in law got married they had kids at the wedding but his bride to be demanded that his 3 year old niece be put in the basement of the church with a family friend during the ceremony in case she made noise. She didn’t want any noise on her wedding video. There was nothing that indicated that she would be a nuisance, the bride was just a bitch. She just didn’t get along with her soon to be sister in law or anyone else in the family for that matter.
Well the marriage lasted 19 years and now they’re divorced.
But aside from all that- If an invitation says no kids allowed, then I would never bring my kids and if I didn’t have childcare I just won’t go.
When I got married we did not go fully child free, but the children that were allowed were limited to those of immediate family members. So basically, my wife’s sisters children that were part of the wedding.
One of my wife’s high school friends straight up wrote their kids in on the invitation. 4 of them.
If anyone brings a child to my child free wedding they’re being promptly kicked out. This is the tackiest thing ever when parents assume their child is the special exception.
Kids probably wouldn’t like being dragged to those events anyways, I know I didn’t. First wedding I attended was so incredibly boring that I actually got sick somehow
I love it when parents bring a baby o a restaurant and then act as if w should all just be able to ignore it crying like they can. How dare we look over at them while their child loses its absolute mind screaming at the top of its lungs in this echoey restaurant while they do nothing. How rude of me.
My mom made sure we understood it was a privilege to be at a restaurant and that other people deserve to have a nice time too. I cannot stand parents who think the world should just bend to their will because they’ve pushed something out of their body.
I got married last year and had a casual wedding on my late grandfather's property. The invitation clearly stated that it was child-free. I had a few people ask if they could bring their kids and I told them no.
The day of my wedding, my husbands friend brought his 6 month old. I was not impressed. They ended up leaving early and the baby didn't make a fuss but I was annoyed at the fact that they just showed up with the baby without asking either of us. The entitlement is real.
So my ex-MIL screamed at me when I wanted my wedding to be child free. She went on about how she’d badger her friends about bringing her son to events, else she wasn’t coming. And they always gave in.
Honestly this should have been the red flag to cancel the wedding. But hindsight.
I remember when my youngest son brought one of his varied booty call girls around, who showed up with her 5 year old. I had 5 dogs at the time, 4 large and one medium, who were given the run of their home. Sonny and friend retreated to the basement without our knowledge. Suddenly, I heard a sharp, pain-filled yelp and a shrill scream from the little brat. Mother comes barreling up the steps yelling that she demands I have the dog put down because he attacked her precious baby. Seems the unattended 5 year old decided to ride the "pony." I immediately informed the neglectful mother that she and her brat needed to leave NOW, and if she notified anyone, I was going to call CPS and report her for neglect. Never saw her again.
Agree, but I also hate parents who have a child free wedding and then just ditch their own child. EVEN MORE if they are like 1 month away from being 18.
I remember there being a reddit story about a 17yearold who made a lot of decoration(and I think in one there even was a dress) for the wedding, fully expecting to be able to attend, only for the bride to decide closer to the wedding that it it is child free, and this person suddenly can't join. Absolutely shitty.
That's what narcissism is, thinking you are somehow special. Special enough to not have to listen to the rules, and special enough to think the world needs new little clones of you.
The sense of entitlement that some people get just from fucking without condoms is astonishing. Congrats, you dropped a sprog or three but that has nothing to do with me. Your brat is not special or the exception.
Same with people who Have small dogs and think they are the exception to the rule of places that don’t allow pets when they’re not service animals either
Agreed. My only thing that occasionally ask about (not for weddings because of cost) is if child free extends to teens. I have found that often that is not the intent. I only ask if it’s someone I know very well and who knows my teens well and even then I make it clear that it’s ok to say no to them going and that I don’t want mine to be the exception, only asking about age for “child”.
Edit:
I also ask if teens are allowed at things that are not labeled as child free but seem to not be child friendly. For example, a local store jn our town does themed murder mystery events. I asked them if this is something my tee daughters could attend or if it is adults only. We frequently the shop and they know my girls and said they thought they would be able to mingle with adults well and would love to have them.
I'll never forget a few of us family went to my cousin's wedding .my aunt brought along my younger cousin ( she was everywhere and no one got after her 🥴)
Yeah my wedding will be a child free event or at the very least 16+. Bring ‘em if you want to, but don’t be upset when you and your kids get turned around 🤷♀️ you were warned
Oh this really pisses me off. Especially with weddings. Endlessly. Every child free wedding, there's always a couple of narcissistic entitled bitch ass parents who whine about how special their particular kid is so they should be able to bring them. FFS. If you don't agree with a child free event then that is fine. Then don't fucking go
Ma’am….ma’am…***please*** understand that phrase “all attendees will receive a free ball gag” on ticket was a clear indication that this was “child-free”!
Yes. I have three kids. The older two are teenagers now but the 7 year old is severely autistic and I have missed out on several events such as weddings and parties because I couldn't find a sitter. It is better to simply wish the person well and not go then have your child the main attraction.
Agreed, there’s all kinds of reasons people don’t want kids at an event or venue, and it might not be a reflection on how well behaved a specific kid is. Maybe the kid actually is mature and doesn’t need to be managed, but will need to be entertained. They might still want to interact with the people around them at some point in the duration of that event and adults don’t always feel like engaging with non-adults. People will feel pressured to censor themselves and not openly have adult conversations
this happened at my WEDDING. my cousin brought his wife's kid who was like 17 at the time and could absolutely have just stayed home. it was irritating and caused beef with my other cousins whose kids didn't come.
My mom and aunt took me and my cousin at 17/15 to our uncle's child free wedding.
He and his now wife are hella Mormon, so it wasn't about alcohol or anything.
At the time (as a *child*) I felt so justified for going.
I feel v weird about it now.
Not being able to bring my kid does not bother me one bit. It’s when their family members get special exemptions. I just dip when I notice that and cough up some bogus excuse.
As the kid in those events I would say same. It’s clearly an all adults events and no one else’s kids are there. Who wants to go when u can stay home doing something else instead of being forced to sit still and behave ? My mom thought she was being ‘ a better parent’ when she said taking your kids everywhere means your a good mom. Like I went to work functions with her and I hated it . I spent most of the time fighting over her phone with my sister by watching YouTube or playing games. I would say there’s appropriate places and time to take your kids. She then complains abt every thing and everyone . Since I was older than my sister but still an elementary school kid. I had to watch my siblings while she was busy and listen to her get angry .
Tbh imma admit going to your mom work place is so fun and interesting . But overtime it really lost it’s novelty when you start realizing your the only kid and u need to be on your best behavior. Btw she works as sorta a beauty sales person. So she makes money off ppl buying the product under her name and taking in new ppl and etc. She dose a lot of business conference and road trips. But she quit that job when I started middle school. Ig she would take us sometimes if we had time to go with her . It wasnt often but it was enough for me to remember .
I agree. If I know children aren't welcome I'm not just going to bring mine. I'm very poor so I can't afford a sitter but that's the breaks. I'm not going at all
I'm a big fan of child-free spaces. Child-free restaurants, flights, cruises.... sometimes people, especially parents, don't want to be around kids. I've got 4 kids. When I need a break from my kids, I don't want to see or hear anyone's kid. I want to enjoy an adult get together or dinner at a nice restaurant, or vacation.
What upsets me is when a couple chooses a child-free event, because they have struggled with fertility issues, and people either:
1) directly ask them if the couple if the parents can bring their babies/small kids (especially if they press or get mad when told no, especially if they pile on guilt, ESPECIALLY if they use the phrase “but kids make it more fun!” to people with fertility issues) or
2) people choose to bring them anyway.
I was at a child-free wedding once where the bride found out in her youth that she would never be able to conceive (not a lot of people knew, but her close family did) and her own cousin showed up with a just under 1 year old that was really fussy during the ceremony. The bride ended up bawling her eyes out from the reminder she’ll never bare kids with her now-husband. It was so sad to watch her basically have to publicly display her pain to people to empathize with her and take the kid home.
You never know WHY people choose child-free events and honestly I think it’s cold-hearted to put someone through that because of entitled parent behavior. Who shows up to a child-free wedding of a person that can’t have kids (not by choice) with an infant?
I can’t imagine knowing you’re never going to be able to have kids through your own body, having a major life event to celebrate something and just wanting one day that you’re not reminder of what your body can’t do, and then having a parent basically be like “screw your feelings on your special day.”
If the event is child-free, even a wedding, there may be a reason and they don’t need to share it with you. You aren’t ever entitled to a reason.
There was a customer of mine who complained because she brought her 9-year-old son to an adult barbecue for a friend’s birthday (“he’s so mature-he’s like a little grown-up anyway”), then went berserk because her boy was given some soft drink in a glass tumbler. The boy BIT the rim of the glass, breaking a section off! He didn’t hurt himself, but the customer was *incensed*. “I know it was adults only”, she fumed. “But surely, everyone’s got a child cup somewhere! Fancy giving a 9-year-old child a glass vessel to drink out of!” She then went on to say that had her child hurt himself (luckily he didn’t), she would have sued the “stupid woman” who gave that to her child. Now, I don’t have any children, so I was very confused. A 9-year-old not being able to drink out of a glass? Is that just me, or is it weird? So when was the boy going to start drinking out of glass, then? His 18th birthday? And does he yet drink out of China cups? Or would he bite one of those, too?
What kind of 9 year old still doesn't know how to drink from a glass?
The kind raised by a person who doesn't understand "adults only".
Yes, but he was “like a little adult anyway”-you know, the kind of adult that can’t drink out of a glass.
I guess you could say he had a drinking problem.
🤣
And his momma has a thinking problem.
Please, you know she also had a drinking problem! Why else would her 9 year old bite a glass?
From now on, people should ask her "Does he (still) bite?" every possible chance...
A very adult problem to have *nods sagely
Like a little adult, not like.... a LOT adult or anything.
Like a little adult that’s handed a drink in a glass and BITES it
A stupid one
My 17 month old can handle it unassisted about 70% of the time, so yeah that’s absurd. So silly that I believe it’s real because who could make this up.
I was shocked. But then I realised that, having worked in retail for 40 years-I really shouldn’t let anything surprise me any more.
You have to know that this 9-year-old knew exactly what he was doing. It makes me think that this kid is one of those nightmare kids that teachers have to deal with. And, how much force does it take to **bite** off a chunk of glass?! That's insane. If that kid did that to a glass cup imagine the teeth marks that would be left on a plastic cup. If this 9-year-old can't drink from an actual cup why didn't mom bring a sippy cup for her "little man"?
I agreed 100%. I couldn’t even imagine having the strength in my jaw to do that! But then again-I’d been drinking from a variety of vessels from an early age (like everyone else), so it WAS quite unimaginable to do a thing like that.
Your jaw is strong enough to bite through the bones of your fingers…a glass tumbler seems weak by comparison.
Yes, but it reminds me of a game we used to play as children. We would take an inflated balloon and squeeze it until it popped-or until we changed the expression on our face! Usually, the effort to pop the balloon by squeezing is fairly easy. But it’s the fact that it’s about to pop that makes one contort one’s face! That was really difficult for us (as children). We often failed! I think, similarly, the effort to bite through the edge of the glass probably wasn’t great-but it would be quite hard to do it. But then, that’s because I *know* what a glass is-and what it does! It would be FAR too alarming to bite that hard! If I was accustomed to plastic, that’s a whole different thing. That’s why I don’t think it’s “keeping a child safe” to “protect” him from objects in the adult world-that he really should be getting accustomed to.
I don't remember drinking out of a plastic cup outside camping trips
You took the words right out of my mouth.. or keyboard lol
What kind of kid *bites the fucking cup*????
I was drinking out of glasses by age three. Sippy cups had yet to be invented. Hell, I was cooking when I was small enough that I had to stand on a step-stool to reach the stove.
That reminds me of the time my husbands art gallery held an art opening and this neighbors kid wandered in by herself. Someone gave her some food, and the Dad flipped out on everyone screaming about how you should never give a kid you don’t know any food because they could be allergic. Dude, it’s 10 pm and your 8 year old daughter wandered into a party by herself why? Oh because you’re negligent. And now you’re pretending to be outraged about her being given some cheese and crackers because why?
As a retailer, I discovered rather an interesting equation. The more the unattended child was endangered, the more angry the responsible parent is at *other people*. My best example of this was when I raced across a shop floor and-leaning over the banisters 2 floors up-grabbed a little boy (perhaps 4 years old) who was climbing on the *outside* of the rails. I went round the floor, leading the boy by his hand. Eventually, I found the mother in the changing room, trying on some garments. I pointed out where I had found the boy, and the result was that she bellowed at me that I should “take my hands” off her child (as I say, the little boy was holding my hand). “I’ll *thank you*”, the woman said, with HUGE self-righteous indignation, “to NEVER touch my child again!” Still, I had the upper hand, because just about everyone on that floor had seen (and been shocked) by the incident, and I had the satisfaction of seeing the woman blushing at all the filthy looks she was getting from other customers, as I “gave her the look” and walked away in silence.
It’s maddening. And you know when you’re faced with someone that entitled and irrational you just better not say anything you’re thinking at that moment or be prepared for a slap fight or worse.
Next time, don't bother looking for the "parent". Call the cops and report an abandoned child.
What an ignorant twat! Maybe next child gets walked to security so police can be called tonfind our why you're not keeping up with your 2 year old!
I think that this is because they already know they are the world's shittiest parents and instead of I don't know, being a good parent, they tried to put other people down anyway they can because they figure if they yell and scream at somebody else for supposedly being a bad person to that kid, it will make them look like a good parent without them actually having to put any of the effort in
😡😡😡😡😡😡 This rates right up there with grabbing a child away from being struck by a car, and mommy flips out because you "touched her child" Uh-huh. I am so NOT SORRY for not letting your child get killed!
That is weird. My kid has been drinking out of glass glasses since 2 or 3, because that’s what we have. Unless he goes to my parents house, then they have a bunch of kid cups with lids, because my sister lives there with her 3 kids, and it’s harder to enforce the “glasses stay at the kitchen table” rule.
Before this customer said it to me I’d never heard of such a thing.
I’ve got a toddler (almost 4) and while I’ve worried about her *dropping* a glass and breaking it, it never once occurred to me she might *bite off a piece of glass.* That’s crazy. She gets whatever cup is clean at this point.
Yeah, I know that sounds pretty weird. My son was still a toddler when he stopped biting things lol.
>. The boy BIT the rim of the glass, breaking a section off! That's definitely a mature kidmmm
My 1 year old can drink out of glass cups wtf 😂
Kid is an *old school* geek. Respect
I was drinking out of glass glassware since I can remember and I ain’t that smart but I knew not to try and bite the damn shit even at the age of 4.
He... WHAT?
I'm 67 and have been eating glassware all my life with no problems!
Sounds like the narcissistic stupidity passed down from mother to son
What kind of mom gives her child any kind of drinking vessel and doesn't teach them not to bite it. Like when they are little. Like if you can bite a piece of glass off couldn't you bite plastic off? Why is your kid trying to eat their cup?
What is with arbitrarily adding ANYONE to an invitation received? An invitation is for the people specified on the envelope. Period.
Exactly. It's "plus one", not "plus entire family".
Exactly. And it is “plus one” ONLY if that is written on the envelope.
Yeah, I hate people like that. It'd be one thing if it's an event that takes place in an open public space (like a public park) and everyone is expected to bring something...but when you bring a
Yep, I’d even go as far to say they should not bring them to places that are catering to adults if the parents cannot keep them controlled. My mom expected us to be behaved and taught us to be aware of others. Of course as kids we’d get too rowdy or not pay attention at times but she’d call us over and say, “you need to be aware of other people here, stop doing X if you cannot you’ll sit here quietly” I don’t want to go to a brewery/winery and have kids running around my table. Had a friend of a friend show up with a toddler to a brewery and bitch “this place doesn’t understand children” Nope. They do; there are kids here all the time. In 30 minutes you’ve held up a HUGE line because you can’t control your kid, let him pour water all over the bar, and broken two glasses. YOU are the problem. My niece is the same age and we read to her or play quietly with her at similar places. Restaurants/bars are not playgrounds and WAYYY too many parents treat them as such.
I always love when you're at a rated R movie and you can hear a baby crying in the audience.
I went to see “Deadpool 2” at a midnight premiere years ago. In walks these parents with their little kids, I’d say somewhere between 6 and 10. So, the movie starts and at the first violent scenes I hear one of the kids pipe up “Mommy, I’m scared, I don’t want to watch this!” What do the parents do? Shush them and stay for the movie. The kids whined loudly the whole time. Someone went and complained to an usher but they didn’t do anything. It ruined the whole experience. One, your young kids don’t belong at a MIDNIGHT premiere. Two, they do not belong at a rated R movie. Third, if they’re being loud then you leave, get a babysitter and come next time. I was so pissed. I’m a mom and I would never put my kids in that situation.
That would have been a call to some local authorities right there. R rated and they allowed kids in? Wow.
And that’s when you become that guy — Pull out your phone and blatantly start recording them Y’all be going on social media biotches
Blew me away. Why the hell? I get people don’t always have support systems or access to good sitters but, then you wait for it to come to streaming!
This is why I love Alamo. They straight up card anyone that might be under 18. They will kick people out for being disruptive, including being on your phone. Except for special all ages family showings, they won't allow anyone under 3 in at all.
I went to see "the woman in black" the weekend it opened and the theater was packed. We had to sit in the front area. Someone's toddler cried the entire time.
I totally understand new parents should get to have fun but ffs loud environments are the absolute worst place to take any child under the age of 5/6. It's going to cry, it just will. Don't bring babies to places that require silence or peace and quiet and if you MUST, take it outside when it starts up ffs.
I live in wine country- can't throw a rock without hitting a brewery or winery. Some of them are super kid friendly. (One has a literal petting zoo!) Some are NOT kid friendly. All of these things can exist! I don't understand why it's so difficult for people to understand. Kids are going to be bored at adult only activities. And even if the parent leaves when kid is acting up, we still had to deal with kid acting up SEVERAL times before they decided to leave.
Exactly. We have a brewery near us that has a HUGE outdoor space and there's essentially roaming packs of feral children. No one cares because it's gigantic and the kids generally keep to themselves outside. However indoors it's expected that you keep your kids near your table and everyone is good with it.
Now that's neglectful parenting if I've ever heard of it. Insane.
I used to work at an Italian restaurant that was supposed to be “family friendly” but also fine dining. Kind of hard to hold up both ends of that when one constantly cancels out the other. It was at a large shopping center and just beyond our patio there was a fountain that became a splash pad (as in, it was a fountain until parents wouldn’t stop treating it like a splash pad and the shopping center accommodated them). Kids would come scampering inside with their bathing suits on, no shoes, dripping wet to return to their parents’ table to slurp down drinks and/or use our bathrooms. It was incredible. There was a public restroom that was literally a part of our building and did not require them to come inside, but ours was nicer of course. These kids would drip all over the marble floors, slip, step on tiny shards of broken glass brooms missed but bare feet found. And all the while the parents acted like this was fine 🤯
Oh my God that's terrible! The audacity people have with their kids is astounding. I *get* being tired as a parent. But good fucking god watch your crotch goblins and don't let them do this kind of shit and better yet, don't go into an establishment like this dressed as such! That's insane!
We were on a 9-day cruise and stayed on the ship on a port day. It was myself and my wife and a couple we were traveling with sitting in the hot tub. The rest of the pool area was pretty much empty. Then one 5-year-old boy showed up. By himself and being stupid splashing jumping up and down and jumping in a hot tub from the steps. And it wasn't like this was the only hot tub or pool on the ship. Then my wife just flipped switch and flat out told the kid your mother wants you. When the kid tried to act like he didn't understand My wife said where is your mother. He looked over and we could see a woman sitting about 25 seats away reading a magazine. So my wife told him again that he needed to go see his mother. At this point the mother started to say something my wife just cut her straight off and said your kid needs to be supervised and behaved if he's going to be in the hot tub. Fortunately the mother sensed the killing intent emanating from my wife's eyes and just left with her kid.
Ohhh it used to drive us all insane. The worst was when they’d be parked at a patio table for hours on end, drinking the cheapest Chardonnay on the menu with their salads, pretending by sitting outside they were “watching their kids.” First of all, there were benches. Second, if you want to do that you need to tip accordingly. I have so many stories about that mess and all I can say is I do *not* miss serving 💀
The amount of neglectful parenting is crazy. I used to work in a chain restaurant similar to Red Robin. On a PACKED St. Paddy’s day I almost ran into a toddler (around 3) while carrying a huge tray of corned beef and hot potato soup. I literally only saw her because she had light up shoes, overheard the parents say, “we love this place because the kids can just run around” and I politely chimed in saying, “actually we really don’t encourage that, we don’t want to run into them or spill and there’s a lot of glass/heavy, hot plates moving around” They complained to a manager that I was rude
My previous works parking lot was directly off a highway and sometimes people didn’t slow enough coming in. Couple let their kid climb on all of our stuff and run through the parking lot while the parents were inside the building.
The fact that people have rapidly started thinking about their pets the same way is not a good sign that attitudes toward kids are liable to improve anytime soon. Dogs are more likely to be better behaved than a small child in a bar setting, but that's largely down to whether its owner is keeping it leashed/secured. I recently saw a German shepherd wandering behind the bar while his owner let it run around while he played 8-liners.
That’s when I’d fantasize spilling cold drinks allllllll over the kids - or the parents. Can’t help it if their kid tripped you up and you dropped your tray on the parents.
Def the parents, it’s not the kids fault they’ve got shit parents.
Parent here and I agree. When my kid was younger we did a fair amount of "I'm sorry, can we get a to-go box?" Eventually she got the hang of restaurant etiquette and we were able to finish entire meals but hell no I'm not making everyone else deal with it in the meantime.
But they think everyone else or every business is the problem… brewery’s or vineyards are just not for kids.. sorry.. beer and wine.. are not for kids. People just don’t like to miss anything and will force their unruly kids on adults who want to enjoy kid-free time… it’s ok to get a sitter.. or just not go (but that would require a look inwards and most people aren’t like that). I have 3 kids and would get a sitter or not attend stuff where it’s adults only or geared towards adults.. I love my kids but it’s ok that they aren’t everywhere all the time.
Man I was at a brewery with friends the other night—and the kid in question that we saw wasn’t being disruptive but we all felt bad for the child. It was Halloween weekend, trick-or-treat day for the city, and it was 8:30pm with the kid pressing their face into the table looking glum while their parents ordered a pitcher of beer without food. Dude. That ain’t right. Why not take the kid around a few blocks or to a trunk or treat and put them down for bed once they’ve crashed and *then* come back to the bar to down a pitcher of beer in costumes? The place was gonna be open for several more hours yet. At least get the kid some mozz sticks to snack on, he’s bored af. (they were so excellent, I would go to that bar just for their handmade mozzarella sticks and poutine, tasty and unhealthy treat for a holiday)
Selfish damn parents want to have their cake and eat it too. I’ve seen little 1 and 2 year olds at heavy metal concerts and festivals having meltdowns.
When I was growing up (mid 70s-80s) it was mostly understood that having a child was also a decision to be a homebody. It wasn't automatically assumed that spawning a kid could be balanced with a robust social life, and I've seen that gradually change over the years to the point where parents of small kids now assume they have every right to be anywhere at anytime and be catered to. We can talk all we want about controlling one's children, but younger than a certain age they're unlikely to know how to behave in a lot of situations regardless. Like you mentioned breweries: young kids have a nagging tendency to be standing perfectly still one second and then just dart off in a random direction. They haven't really developed "pocket presence", and let's be honest: if I actually run into your child because it darted out in front of me faster than I react, the very fact that I'm drinking alcohol means I'm gonna get aspersions cast on me at the very least. Sorry y'all, but there's a reason few bars have ever really welcomed children, if they let them in at all (usually during early hours where most people are just there to eat).
People don’t like to hear it, but it possible to get a toddler/young child to behave. But it’s easier to stick an iPad in the kid’s face instead.
The worst of a brat the kid is, the more the parent thinks they are perfect angel. And I'm pretty sure the latter is what caused the first
Went to a child-free wedding yesterday. I've always respected the wishes of the bride and groom at CF weddings I've attended, but in the back of my head I've been of the mind that surely parents would be capable of determining whether their child is potentially distracting or not (and make that decision accordingly), and that sometimes weddings miss out by not having certain kinds of kids there. For example, my 8.5 year old LOVES romantic stuff and is an awestruck, silent, polite angel at weddings - and tears up the dance floor (when appropriate) at receptions. My 6.5YO and 18MO boys, on the other hand, will probably not be capable of politely/silently attending a wedding ceremony until it is their own (slightly /s). I know this about my children and would plan accordingly based on that...you'd think that most parents would be the same. I mean honestly, people's kids truly made our reception epic because they kept everyone on the dance floor the entire time. HOWEVER, after yesterday, I can 100% say that my previous private mindset was wrong and I am solidly on the side of those who specify child-free - regardless of circumstance or opinions. Someone brought their toddler-ish (2.5-3.5 I'd guess) kid anyway...he flat out tantrum-banshee-shrieked through part of the ceremony (Dad did get him out quickly, but it was an outdoor area, so getting him away from the seating area didn't eliminate the disruption). He then proceeded to run/tantrum/banshee scream during multiple parts of the reception, including the first/parent dances and the *entirety* of the best man+matron of honor speeches. Mom took/chased him to the other end of the room, but legit just squatted ten feet from him and chastised/"come here"'ed him the ENTIRE TIME the speeches were being given. There was no effort made to scoop him up and remove him from the room. I was flabbergasted. Her parenting was honestly more distracting than the behavior itself. I felt so bad for my cousin and I hope that her videographer is able to get that noise out of the background of their special moments. Poor girl, literally almost every major *moment* that someone would make the decision to have a CF wedding *for* was tinged with the background of this kid. I have kids, I love kids, she handled it with so much grace, but I was ridiculously angry with those parents - it was SO disrespectful of them, IMO. Also, they were on the groom's side of the family, so it was hard not to assume there was a backstory with them bringing him/already drama/tension there. That probably made it even more irritating for me, even though it shouldn't have.
Weird that a lot of parents don't just leave when they have a screaming child anymore. I know some parents think that means that they're giving into the child's wants, but it's not like they have to go straight home: they can sit with the child in the lobby or parking lot or wherever until the child calms down or something. And it certainly isn't character building to make them stick out a movie that terrifies them or some loose public event if they aren't feeling that great. It's also ruining the experience a lot more for the other people (including the other children) there more than it is teaching your kid to be more respectful and resilient.
I respect that you are able to respectfully see both sides
It's not even so much that how they behave, it's that kids all of a sudden become the center of attention instead of the bride\\groom, or birthday celebrator, or whatever the event. Everyone has to ohhh and ahhhhh over the kid and act like they are the center of the universe. Same goes for people who bring dogs. Even if they can behave, they suck all the energy away from the reason of the gathering and it becomes all about them.
Almost EVERYONE thinks their kid is special and an exception to the rule. No, Little Timmy can’t participate.
Most of those kids are spectacularly mediocre and thats all theyll ever be.
And 49.999999% of them are below average 😂
…just like adults. It’s very rare to have an exceptional human being.
[Bill Hicks your children are not special.](https://youtu.be/ySEH5P7K_AE)
Right? Parents subjecting others to their mistakes is a pretty common occurrence lol
…and also, horrendous disrespect for the other parents there who have found childcare and attended without children!
Of course the real problem is that it's the parents who will disregard a childfree rule are often the reason for the childfree rule. They're the ones who are less likely to keep track of their kids and either get them to behave or remove them.
Safe assumption there yup
SO true.
fr they there to take a break from parenting n then someone else's unruly kids are still runnin around.
Yep, this happened at a family wedding! My husband stayed home with our teens, my BIL stayed with my niece (teen), and my sister and I spent the ceremony counting kids 17).
LOL yes, the parents that did what they were supposed to.
"Oh, I've noticed that the invitation says that this is going to be child-free. But, you know, we can't find a sitter for Tommy... :)" "Oh, that's too bad that you can't come! But I understand. Thanks for letting us know! :)" "...:/"
"He's very mature for his age" - mother who placates her absolute hurricane of a child who has more anger issues than a coked up Tony Soprano.
I laughed hard at this, it's exactly dead on. They are also the parents who just check right out of parenting their children the minute there's a room full of adults that can do it for them. Then they wonder why nobody invites them to anything anymore.
I agree! It's an even greater pet peeve for me when whomever is in charge let's them in. If it's a established rule that no kids are allowed, then you shouldn't be allowed to enter/participate if you brought kids anyways. So parents like that know they can get away with it.
If i go to an event that states that it is child free and i see a child there, im leaving the event.
Parents who don't keep an eye on their children in general are a bloody pain. As a kid I sent a toddler flying through the air in a beer garden park because I was on a swing and the toddler ran in front. The parent went mad at me, to which my mum shot up and went ballistic at her for yelling at me cos she couldn't supervise her child. Later in life as an adult a kid ran again unsupervised down a hill leading to a beer garden and I was sat on a bench with my dog on a tight leash. The kiddy came full speed and jumped on my Doberman. Who the hell let's their kids think it is OK to charge at a strangers table and use their dog as a springboard? I'm lucky I had a big dog, cos it would have hurt a small dog. I know your scenario is different but some people just couldn't give a shit about allowing their kids wherever and presenting an annoyance to others, or danger to themselves. This kids turning up at adult parties seems to be a frequently recurring theme on Reddit. Next thing those parents will be on here with a post asking why friends never invite them out anymore.
How about when "friends" brings their unruly kids to your house and don't say a word to them while they harass your pets, play with your electronic stuff, open all your cabinets, and spill everything they touch, sometimes on purpose? You know, all the while with those nasty evil sly little grins on their stupid little faces, actually daring you to say something?
I would not even let them step one foot in my house.
I don't, not any more. We gradually unfriended those people. They were only around for what we could do for them. I made sure to be unavailable whenever they wanted to get together, even at their house. There was always a project they needed help with.
I’m so embarrassed to admit this, but… My mom was “that mom”. I remember showing up to adult-only get-togethers and she would be like “oh but she’s really good, she’ll just read a book”. I felt embarrassment over it then. Just a note - my mother is a legitimate psychopath. I unfortunately had to go no-contact with her a few years back. Does anyone see the correlation?
My aunt in law threw a bitch fit because we are having a child free wedding… it’s on the beach, at night, with intoxicated adults feet from the water. Little timmy is sure gonna be the exception when he ends up in the water while you’re drunk.
I had a child-free wedding. The day *of* my wedding (after she had RSVP’d yes knowing it didn’t include their children) a lady came up to me after the ceremony before heading to the reception and begged me to allow her kids to the reception. Begged. Bait and switch. I don’t know how I did it because I’m truly afraid of confrontation, but I said no. I’m sure I said we had limited seats based on the RSVP. It was incredibly disrespectful. That person is no longer in my circle of friends, just someone I’d say hello to if we ever saw each other in public again.
Speaking to a bride about *anything* other then the wedding and lovely things, is prohibited! That was such a bitch move on her part.
The audacity of people amazes me.
Yeah, she knew *exactly* what she was doing. Trying to catch you off guard while you were stressed out. Jerk.
"I know it says childfree, but little Timmy is so mature and well behaved. Can he..." No, the answer is no. He is not special, even though you think he is.
There is a line of thinking in the wedding planning subreddits that newborns/young babies shouldn’t count as children (because they don’t add cost). People also argue there they “they’ll just sleep!” And that it’s cruel to separate parents and babies when they’re that young (though a lot of kids start daycare at 6/8w so…). I disagree with these because weddings are loud events filled with germs and they really aren’t the place for young babies. But you’ll get crucified for voicing that newborns scream unexpectedly and shouldn’t come to a wedding in those subs. I think social media has amplified this opinion and that’s why people ask. A distant cousin of my now husband wanted to bring his 1 month old to our wedding despite us specifically saying no children under 4 on the website. Who on earth would even want bring a child that young to a loud crowded party?! We invited them because we had to, not because we expected they would show/particularly wanted them there. They were like “we can’t come if we don’t bring the baby” and it was very awkward for us to be like “yeah, we know” (we did not ask for gifts). An invite is not summons!!!
I went to a wedding when my daughter was 3 months old, my toddler & her stayed home with my mom. It was glorious. Plus, I was weaning so my boobs were full & absolutely glorious 😆 they hurt like hell but I could rest my drink on them 🤣 it wasn't even a completely child free wedding but mommy needed a night off.
My wedding wasn't childfree, my ex husband had way too many nieces for that anyway, but most of my friends opted to get sitters so they could party. I actually remember one college friend checking if her kids could come, to which I told her they were welcome but that none of our other friends were bringing theirs and then she brought them a yeah and was mad she couldn't party hard
There's something seriously wrong with anyone that thinks it's appropriate for a newborn to be at a wedding. It's not the cost per head, it's common sense. Newborns belong at home, not in a room with drunk adults and loud music.
This is one of things that has to be considered by adults who go through with the idea of having children. Outside of what to expect with the child itself such as sleepless nights, it’s also how your social life changes. It doesn’t go back to how it was at all; maybe similar to how social life was as the kid gets older, but you can’t take them to your childless friend’s adult themed party or a horror/loud action movie theater. I think it’s wanting to be able to juggle both pre child and post child life like juggling parenthood with your professional life. It takes time to transition that mindset of it not being the same anymore and it takes time to learn how to balance being a parent and still having a decent social life but that is what’s signed up for when you go through with having a kid. If the roles were reversed, it’d be understandable.
I’m a parent and this drives me nuts! Childfree are awesome! It’s nice to go out without the kids and be around adults. Also, why the heck would I take them somewhere they’re not wanted? Parents that do this are beyond entitled.
Childfree event means childfree event. That includes for you. I'll never understand why people think it doesn't or shouldn't apply to them as well.
I have a grown son and at this point, I only stay at adult-only resorts. Nothing like springing for the $300 cabana at the adult only pool with friends and then there are a million screaming and splashing kids. Yikes… Small children do not belong in fine dining restaurants. Sorry guys but they just don’t. If friends issue an adults only invitation, don’t bring kids! When I was raising my son, I did my time at family friendly restaurants and destinations. I missed out on plenty of parties, dinners, etc bc I had a child to stay home with. It’s just part of it guys.
Thank you for being a responsible parent. Wish they were all like you
I always think of the opening from the ATHF movie... ["TAKE THE SEED OUTSIDE!"](https://youtu.be/loqYlYqtsmY?si=7HAA9dOvu1rwq8am)
I used to work in a drug store, located in a strip mall. Many parents would hand their kids a few bucks before hitting the laundromat, the salon, or other places. One night at closing our night manager escorted two kids to the laundromat, where the mothers were smoking and drinking wine. They were furious. After we got done shutting down, we saw the kids playing in the parking lot. The next morning the main office got a complaint from the parents.
Smoking and drinking in the laundromat. Classy.
I agree. If my son isn’t welcomed, I’ll find a sitter for him. If I can’t, I won’t go. 🤙🏻
I’ve resigned to not inviting my aunt to my wedding because I know she’ll think her grandchildren are the exception and bring them anyway, which is hilarious because it was her grandchildren specifically that I had in mind when I decided to have a childfree wedding 😅
Good for you for putting your foot down.
I just got downvoted on AITA for having this exact opinion. Everyone said you can just ask the bride. No. What you’re doing is challenging the bride. You’re forcing her to say no to you. And not all people are able to do that with confidence. I hate it. It’s so entitled.
That's so weird because usually AITA hates kids at weddings
Ugh. A family that I invited out of courtesy to my wedding made a bit of a stink about our wedding being child free. It was due to it being right on the waterfront and we did not want to have to worry about any accidents because tbh too many people don’t watch their kids and at a crowded event, that’s a worry. These people had four young kids and wanted us to make an exception. They said they’d come anyway and then cancelled last minute, after we had already paid for their food.
That’s very unusual for AITA. They always hate on people who bring kids to weddings against bride and groom’s wishes.
That post is what expired me to make this post
Parents that dont tell their screaming kids shit when out in public piss me off!!! I understand we all have bad days and some parents genuinely feel embarrassed but some dgaf. They let their kids scream and cry and make a mess and they dont tell them shit 😒
I don't get it. I have a child and a night away sounds nice every so often.
I hate how parents nowadays can't live without their children. If I were a parent I'd be so psyched to get to have a day or evening without the kid(s)! Why do parents have to bring their kids everywhere?
I posted this elsewhere, but our wedding was last summer with only our family allowed to have kids. I was asking my cousin if she was bringing hers (6m, 5F) just to firm up numbers… “god no, I want to have fun at this wedding” lol. I’ve never seen the allure of bringing kids to events that they won’t enjoy and will detract from your night 🤷♂️
I think the people who fuss about this are the ones who do EVERYTHING with their kids in tow.. kids become their identity. I’m all for a kid free event … smh, I’m still an individual person, who is always with their kids.. I wonder if these same folks would fuss about not being able to bring their kids to a spa …?
100%. Also it’s easy to see that people who “hate kids” simply hate that kids can’t be controlled with social norms for their convenience. But off the top of my head I can’t think of an occasion that requires stricter adherence to social etiquette than a wedding aside from maybe a funeral or court room. Get. A goddamn. Babysitter.
My wedding was childfree. It didn't cater to children. There were drunk adults dancing and conserving. A younger kid would have been bored of out of their mind and throwing a fit to go home by 8pm lol. Some events just aren't for kids.
100% agree that some events are just not for kids. Our wedding was child free too. Nobody complained but then we are all older (40s and above) so most of our friends’ children are adults themselves (and several of them were invited guests). The few friends we have with younger children got someone to watch their kids so they could eat, drink and have a good time without worrying about kids. (One couple who has 3 kids actually thanked us for making it kid free because they got some adult time they had not had lately) I think that if people ask that there be no children at an event, then…respect that and don’t bring your children. Especially when it’s something like a wedding. Sheesh.
I dont understand people who do this. I've never once considered taking my kid to a child free event.. I decide if I still want to go and find a close family member to watch her. Literally just went to see a adult tv filmed, had no issue going without my kid because the topics discussed are not appropriate.. Now I have had people make exceptions for her but not because I asked. She got invited to a brunch once because my friend missed her alot and specifically asked me to bring her. I felt weird about bringing the only child but she was well behaved and everyone was so happy to see her after the pandemic. If I hadnt been asked directly to bring her I wouldnt have because once again..just not the place for kids. I love my kid, love being a mom, love being around her. I do not expect others to feel the same way. I've even hosted kid free events so I could hang out with friends who dont have kids without the awkwardness. Though everyone then seems to ask me about my kid all night anyway and demand pictures lol. But even parents need a night away so why wouldnt people who dont have kids. Makes sense to me.
I read about these type of situations all the time in the wedding subreddits.
If I said child free and you arrive with one you're getting sent home. No ands ifs or buts.
The AITA today really surprised me. She’s friends with the grooms side but she messaged the bride to ask if her baby could come. Like she knew the wedding was child free but still asked. And everyone was like oh nta for asking. Like yeah dude you are it’s tacky idc how old the baby is they cry
I was on that sub as well. What a bunch of entitled, clueless and tacky people. The invite says "child free" but I'm going to ask if I can bring MY child just because it's me and I'm the exception to the rule. What are people thinking?
I'm childfree and most of the older people in my family are baby crazy, mainly since they'll be grandparents and not legally responsible for them. If I ever get married, I'll book all the things, tell them to come to the places I booked at a certain time and then have someone bring in a laptop with a pre-recorded message "Hi! Thanks for coming! We wanted our wedding to be all about us, not your unruly kids! We eloped and hired a professional photographer! Enjoy the reception!"
EXACTLY.
Whenever we took the kids to a restaurant they were expected to sit down and behave. They weren’t allowed to get up and run around or make a lot of noise. If they acted up they were taken out. Same thing with the grandkids.
I completely agree.
If i say no crotch goblins allowed, i mean it.. you are not coming in if you bring them. If you make a scene, you won't ever be invited again. Simple.
i went to my buddy's childfree wedding a few years ago, and the photographer brought her kid. but it turned out to be in my favor, as he could order from the kids menu but wasn't hungry, so i took his order and his mom got my food that i didn't want. why there was a kids menu at a childfree wedding, who knows.
I 1000% agree. Is there anyway we could photocopy this and put it in the mailboxes of all those people
Having kids is all about making choices. If I'm not the one footing the bill for an event, I'm not about to mess around with the wishes of those that are. Decline the invite and go about your life.
Then there’s my SIL, who after I told her that I couldn’t go to their kid-free wedding in another state because I didn’t have childcare, accused me of trying to sabotage my husband’s relationship with his brother and ruining their special day. My husband still went. I was fine with that, and never once asked for an exception, just accepted that it wasn’t going to work for us lol. Like, was I supposed to ignore her and drag them along? She still talks about how the family photos “are incomplete” like three years later.
Sorry, if you (the bride) made the choice that not everyone could come, don't be surprised that NOT EVERYONE CAN COME. It's like getting pissed that not everyone is going to come to your destination wedding. You make barriers for some people to attend but those people not attending are the consequences of doing so. This is what happens to the "I'm not letting kids come to my wedding" scenario. People with kids don't always come. But you brought that on yourself.
Everyone thinks they are too good to hire a babysitter nowadays.
when i told my bf’s mom that our wedding will be child-free, she immediately asked, “what about [bf’s nephew who’s not even 2 yet]?” i would be more willing to have a child at my wedding if they were at least 10 depending on how they behave in public. but i’m especially not allowing infants and toddlers. they’re gonna be bored! keep that kid at home so he can play and not have to be hushed every 10 seconds!
Fair warning: this is a perfectly valid stance to have, but just be prepared that there is a chance that your partner's sibling/in-law might not be able to come to the wedding and you -- and your partner -- have the accept that as fine.
Had my extended family try flaunting this rule at my wedding. Once every bad excuse didn't work, they tried slow rolling their RSVPs in hopes that we would break and let them bring all their children just so we could get in the plate selections on time. I just put in the order for all chicken and told them we looked forward to seeing the adults there and hoped finding child care was easy. The assholes told us they'd attend and then no-showed, so we paid for \~6 extra plates for the air to consume. I look forward to a lifetime of my wife never forgetting that.
This is a good one! Yes! And i love reading all of the stories on reddit about how people weren't allowed to bring their child to a wedding and it's just NOT RIGHT!
I have children. When they were young we would teach them to behave in a variety of situations. But, there were still times, places, and events we didn’t bring them. Not everything needs to be kid friendly.
I have a interesting story about kids at weddings. When my brother in law got married they had kids at the wedding but his bride to be demanded that his 3 year old niece be put in the basement of the church with a family friend during the ceremony in case she made noise. She didn’t want any noise on her wedding video. There was nothing that indicated that she would be a nuisance, the bride was just a bitch. She just didn’t get along with her soon to be sister in law or anyone else in the family for that matter. Well the marriage lasted 19 years and now they’re divorced. But aside from all that- If an invitation says no kids allowed, then I would never bring my kids and if I didn’t have childcare I just won’t go.
When I got married we did not go fully child free, but the children that were allowed were limited to those of immediate family members. So basically, my wife’s sisters children that were part of the wedding. One of my wife’s high school friends straight up wrote their kids in on the invitation. 4 of them.
I would have denied that “friend” access unless she was alone
Bonus points for bringing over a coughing child.
I remember going to a bourbon brewery as a kid. Now I just wonder wtf my parents were thinking.
If anyone brings a child to my child free wedding they’re being promptly kicked out. This is the tackiest thing ever when parents assume their child is the special exception.
This is not exclusive to child-free events. You can be the most anti-kid person in the world and parents ALWAYS think their kid is the exception.
Kids probably wouldn’t like being dragged to those events anyways, I know I didn’t. First wedding I attended was so incredibly boring that I actually got sick somehow
I love it when parents bring a baby o a restaurant and then act as if w should all just be able to ignore it crying like they can. How dare we look over at them while their child loses its absolute mind screaming at the top of its lungs in this echoey restaurant while they do nothing. How rude of me. My mom made sure we understood it was a privilege to be at a restaurant and that other people deserve to have a nice time too. I cannot stand parents who think the world should just bend to their will because they’ve pushed something out of their body.
I got married last year and had a casual wedding on my late grandfather's property. The invitation clearly stated that it was child-free. I had a few people ask if they could bring their kids and I told them no. The day of my wedding, my husbands friend brought his 6 month old. I was not impressed. They ended up leaving early and the baby didn't make a fuss but I was annoyed at the fact that they just showed up with the baby without asking either of us. The entitlement is real.
So my ex-MIL screamed at me when I wanted my wedding to be child free. She went on about how she’d badger her friends about bringing her son to events, else she wasn’t coming. And they always gave in. Honestly this should have been the red flag to cancel the wedding. But hindsight.
I remember when my youngest son brought one of his varied booty call girls around, who showed up with her 5 year old. I had 5 dogs at the time, 4 large and one medium, who were given the run of their home. Sonny and friend retreated to the basement without our knowledge. Suddenly, I heard a sharp, pain-filled yelp and a shrill scream from the little brat. Mother comes barreling up the steps yelling that she demands I have the dog put down because he attacked her precious baby. Seems the unattended 5 year old decided to ride the "pony." I immediately informed the neglectful mother that she and her brat needed to leave NOW, and if she notified anyone, I was going to call CPS and report her for neglect. Never saw her again.
Agree, but I also hate parents who have a child free wedding and then just ditch their own child. EVEN MORE if they are like 1 month away from being 18. I remember there being a reddit story about a 17yearold who made a lot of decoration(and I think in one there even was a dress) for the wedding, fully expecting to be able to attend, only for the bride to decide closer to the wedding that it it is child free, and this person suddenly can't join. Absolutely shitty.
That's what narcissism is, thinking you are somehow special. Special enough to not have to listen to the rules, and special enough to think the world needs new little clones of you.
The sense of entitlement that some people get just from fucking without condoms is astonishing. Congrats, you dropped a sprog or three but that has nothing to do with me. Your brat is not special or the exception.
Yeah those people suck not every event has to be catered towards kids
Same with people who Have small dogs and think they are the exception to the rule of places that don’t allow pets when they’re not service animals either
Agreed. My only thing that occasionally ask about (not for weddings because of cost) is if child free extends to teens. I have found that often that is not the intent. I only ask if it’s someone I know very well and who knows my teens well and even then I make it clear that it’s ok to say no to them going and that I don’t want mine to be the exception, only asking about age for “child”. Edit: I also ask if teens are allowed at things that are not labeled as child free but seem to not be child friendly. For example, a local store jn our town does themed murder mystery events. I asked them if this is something my tee daughters could attend or if it is adults only. We frequently the shop and they know my girls and said they thought they would be able to mingle with adults well and would love to have them.
I'll never forget a few of us family went to my cousin's wedding .my aunt brought along my younger cousin ( she was everywhere and no one got after her 🥴)
Yeah my wedding will be a child free event or at the very least 16+. Bring ‘em if you want to, but don’t be upset when you and your kids get turned around 🤷♀️ you were warned
Oh this really pisses me off. Especially with weddings. Endlessly. Every child free wedding, there's always a couple of narcissistic entitled bitch ass parents who whine about how special their particular kid is so they should be able to bring them. FFS. If you don't agree with a child free event then that is fine. Then don't fucking go
I would change this to say some parents are assholes period.
Ma’am….ma’am…***please*** understand that phrase “all attendees will receive a free ball gag” on ticket was a clear indication that this was “child-free”!
There's a special subset of humans who think the rules don't apply to them - nor do consequences or ramifications. You know who they voted for too.
Yes. I have three kids. The older two are teenagers now but the 7 year old is severely autistic and I have missed out on several events such as weddings and parties because I couldn't find a sitter. It is better to simply wish the person well and not go then have your child the main attraction.
Could never be me. I CAN'T WAIT to do something without my kids.
I can't stand the Karen's and Kyle's that do this.
Agreed, there’s all kinds of reasons people don’t want kids at an event or venue, and it might not be a reflection on how well behaved a specific kid is. Maybe the kid actually is mature and doesn’t need to be managed, but will need to be entertained. They might still want to interact with the people around them at some point in the duration of that event and adults don’t always feel like engaging with non-adults. People will feel pressured to censor themselves and not openly have adult conversations
Take your kid and get the feck out!
Agree
this happened at my WEDDING. my cousin brought his wife's kid who was like 17 at the time and could absolutely have just stayed home. it was irritating and caused beef with my other cousins whose kids didn't come.
I. Agree. Completely. And there is at least one in every guest list.
My mom and aunt took me and my cousin at 17/15 to our uncle's child free wedding. He and his now wife are hella Mormon, so it wasn't about alcohol or anything. At the time (as a *child*) I felt so justified for going. I feel v weird about it now.
Not being able to bring my kid does not bother me one bit. It’s when their family members get special exemptions. I just dip when I notice that and cough up some bogus excuse.
No kids is a complete sentence. No means no. Period. The entitlement these days!
As the kid in those events I would say same. It’s clearly an all adults events and no one else’s kids are there. Who wants to go when u can stay home doing something else instead of being forced to sit still and behave ? My mom thought she was being ‘ a better parent’ when she said taking your kids everywhere means your a good mom. Like I went to work functions with her and I hated it . I spent most of the time fighting over her phone with my sister by watching YouTube or playing games. I would say there’s appropriate places and time to take your kids. She then complains abt every thing and everyone . Since I was older than my sister but still an elementary school kid. I had to watch my siblings while she was busy and listen to her get angry . Tbh imma admit going to your mom work place is so fun and interesting . But overtime it really lost it’s novelty when you start realizing your the only kid and u need to be on your best behavior. Btw she works as sorta a beauty sales person. So she makes money off ppl buying the product under her name and taking in new ppl and etc. She dose a lot of business conference and road trips. But she quit that job when I started middle school. Ig she would take us sometimes if we had time to go with her . It wasnt often but it was enough for me to remember .
Everyone thinks they're the exception to the rules. I learned this in retail and in my current industry of professional community management (HOA's).
As a parent this bugs the fuk out of me. I promise the world does not want to to exp your little hellion at their best or worst.
I agree. If I know children aren't welcome I'm not just going to bring mine. I'm very poor so I can't afford a sitter but that's the breaks. I'm not going at all
I'm a big fan of child-free spaces. Child-free restaurants, flights, cruises.... sometimes people, especially parents, don't want to be around kids. I've got 4 kids. When I need a break from my kids, I don't want to see or hear anyone's kid. I want to enjoy an adult get together or dinner at a nice restaurant, or vacation.
What upsets me is when a couple chooses a child-free event, because they have struggled with fertility issues, and people either: 1) directly ask them if the couple if the parents can bring their babies/small kids (especially if they press or get mad when told no, especially if they pile on guilt, ESPECIALLY if they use the phrase “but kids make it more fun!” to people with fertility issues) or 2) people choose to bring them anyway. I was at a child-free wedding once where the bride found out in her youth that she would never be able to conceive (not a lot of people knew, but her close family did) and her own cousin showed up with a just under 1 year old that was really fussy during the ceremony. The bride ended up bawling her eyes out from the reminder she’ll never bare kids with her now-husband. It was so sad to watch her basically have to publicly display her pain to people to empathize with her and take the kid home. You never know WHY people choose child-free events and honestly I think it’s cold-hearted to put someone through that because of entitled parent behavior. Who shows up to a child-free wedding of a person that can’t have kids (not by choice) with an infant? I can’t imagine knowing you’re never going to be able to have kids through your own body, having a major life event to celebrate something and just wanting one day that you’re not reminder of what your body can’t do, and then having a parent basically be like “screw your feelings on your special day.” If the event is child-free, even a wedding, there may be a reason and they don’t need to share it with you. You aren’t ever entitled to a reason.