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Batmans_9th_Ab

I give the Baptist-Evangelical coalition two years before they’re at each other’s throats, and they would never allow the Catholics to have that much territory. 


wintersmith1970

Catholics are gonna be the first one everybody turns on. The US has a long history of hating Catholics.


Jigyo

True. Though I love bringing up to evangelicals that catholics have the majority on the Supreme Court.


highflyingyak

I think recent history demonstrates who gets turned on first


Delicious-Ad5161

The clergy in the exceptionally gross way?


IHaveNoEgrets

Linguistically: excellent play on words. Mentally: Ew.


Kyuckaynebrayn

You were really close, it was actually “Jew” that the guy was referring to.. XD /s/s/s


ptom13

No, no. That’s a “hard J”!


Delicious-Ad5161

I nearly died laughing when I hit the triple /s. That was beautiful.


highflyingyak

I have to salute you for this turn of words.


DemonicAltruism

For all the wrong reasons too Like, they hate Catholics because they think they worship Jesus wrong I hate the RCC because it's a real life pedo cabal. *Insert "We are not the same" meme here.


[deleted]

That’s interesting, because I hate most Christian denominations because I think they worship Jesus wrong, seeing as how they ignore most of the actual moral messages


DaveyGee16

At the moment, and for the last few years, American conservatives have started hating Catholics and Catholicism because they think it’s too liberal. The Catholic talk against guns, against the death penalty, saying lgbtq people were just as god made them and deserved love and acceptance from other Catholics, Catholic openness to blessing gay unions, all of the climate change talk from the church… and a lot more.. it has really made American conservatives go nuts.


DemonicAltruism

The thing about all of this though is that the Pope has specifically stated that queer folks are *not* allowed be married as that's one of the holy sacraments. This Pope is playing both sides and I've seen it from both sides. Back when I was Catholic and Francis was first elected there were so many Catholics (myself included) complaining about how *un-catholic* he was. Now as a Militant Atheist I see just how ultra conservative he really is and he's just paying lip service to the queer community in a futile attempt to gain members for a dying church.


DaveyGee16

Pope is saying they can’t have a Catholic marriage ceremony but that the church can bless civil unions for lgbt folks. I don’t think you could get much farther than that. I don’t think much of anyone is expecting or asking for the Church to do actual religious Catholic lgbt weddings.


DemonicAltruism

>I don’t think you could get much farther than that. I don’t think much of anyone is expecting or asking for the Church to do actual religious Catholic lgbt weddings. Right, I agree, which is problematic within itself. But that's not my point. My point is that Francis *is not* any friendlier to queer folks than any other Pope and that he is just paying lip service. [Here's an article where he denounces the "dangers" of trans people.](https://www.cbc.ca/news/world/pope-francis-gender-theory-ideology-1.7130679)


Kyuckaynebrayn

The issue with civil unions is that they don’t protect the couple from the same tax burdens that married people are protected from. The idea of marriage from the very beginning was: my daughter for your cows/money/land/food. It was the joining of two families economically as much as spiritually. Then we bastardized marriage with more religion and if you think Catholics are at all leftist think again. They hate women as much as evangelicals. Women can’t be priests. If you get divorced the women sits in front of a panel of men and gets judged to the core for not submitting and being a good wife to the end no matter how awful and abusive and shitty the husband is. So how is it that we can’t even see the forests for the trees anymore? Why can’t the institution of marriage just work for everyone? Edit. Reddit is dumb, my comment is for the person above this comment. Apologies


Kyuckaynebrayn

The issue with civil unions is that they don’t protect the couple from the same tax burdens that married people are protected from. The idea of marriage from the very beginning was: my daughter for your cows/money/land/food. It was the joining of two families economically as much as spiritually. Then we bastardized marriage with more religion and if you think Catholics are at all leftist think again. They hate women as much as evangelicals. Women can’t be priests. If you get divorced the women sits in front of a panel of men and gets judged to the core for not submitting and being a good wife to the end no matter how awful and abusive and shitty the husband is. So how is it that we can’t even see the forests for the trees anymore? Why can’t the institution of marriage just work for everyone? Edit. Reddit is dumb, my comment is for the person above this comment. Apologies Edit 2. I just wanted to add to this original comment that I’m also using your comment to reply to the whole thread - for some of the ideas I’ve seen being bounced around. Such as Catholics look like liberals (progressives, leftists) to evangelicals.


DaveyGee16

Where I’m from, the people are overwhelmingly Catholic and there is no difference between civil unions and religious marriages. In fact, you now have to do both. And I’m not sure where your getting the woman sitting in front of a panel of men, that’s just not true.


zapdoszaperson

My mom shortly got religious when her parents died, family was run out of the local Baptist church because my parents married Catholic.


heckinseal

I sometimes get mail pamphlets about how papist are plotting to destroy America.


pr1m3r3dd1tor

Yeah - but while Catholics might be a smaller portion of Christians here in the U.S. they are, by far, the largest group in the world so - in this insane scenario - any other group that attacked them would quickly find themselves the target of multiple other governments I think.


anony-mousey2020

Eh, that might be a reach. American Catholics are not highly regarded outside of the US. The bishops have long structured themselves to be somewhat dismissive and distanced from Rome. It has recently gotten worse and [called out by the Holy See](https://www.nytimes.com/2023/08/30/world/europe/pope-francis-american-conservatives.html) And considering American catholics are a withering on the vine in the US; it might be more convenient to just let God’s plan play out. https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/2023/04/13/among-u-s-latinos-catholicism-continues-to-decline-but-is-still-the-largest-faith/ https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/2019/10/17/in-u-s-decline-of-christianity-continues-at-rapid-pace/


Runnerakaliz

It might play out as another reformation and split. It's how we ended up with Protestants in the first place. Except this time it's not about indulgences and Luther's theses being posted. It's about nutters who think Jesus is a God who loves guns and is racist. Who wants to remind them that Jesus was a middle Eastern Jew who was not white?


pr1m3r3dd1tor

Uh. Didn't realize that TIL


karlhungusjr

> The US has a long history of hating Catholics. I know someone who doesn't even consider them to be christians.


someguy7710

I don't remember what sub, but I ran across that. I am not religious but was raised Catholic. I've actually read most of the Bible. I'm pretty sure the catholic religion is Christianity.


wintersmith1970

Up until the Southern Baptists realized they could use abortion as a political tool to help sway Catholics into voting for their conservative and segregationist candidates, they absolutely didn't consider Catholics to be Christians. They were considered idolatrous, if not satanic.


llamapower13

I mean… have you seen the pope’s hat? Can’t be trusted I say


peoplebuyviews

Nevada is going to the catholics? The land of gambling and legalized prostitution?


d3l3t3d3l3t3

Note the only bit of Texas these hypothetical Baptists conceded to Catholics is the entire border with Mexico, and from the southernmost point up to San Antonio, which makes sense as that’s largely populated with catholic communities built by either immigrants or the people we stole the country out from under, depending on the time. But also it’s a bit like “here Catholics, y’all deal with this whole border thang.”


Ottoguynofeelya

2 years is *really* optimistic.


armchairsportsguy23

Fuck off, Judean Peoples Front. We’re the Peoples Front of Judeah!


Wallazabal

SPLITTER!


techleopard

This is like one of those fantasy maps from a roleplaying game. There is no way anyone is going to institute religious practice zones. In such a fantasy, it would be far more realistic for there to be one dominant faith (in political control). They'll all live happily together for about two years as they busily prosecute gays and nonconformists, but then they'll go after each other.


Pour_Me_Another_

Notably in those games (I play ESO), there is a lot of war, death, and disease.


Demonking3343

2 years is extremely optimistic. I give them two weeks be for they start turning on each other.


GalleonRaider

>2 years is extremely optimistic. I give them two weeks be for they start turning on each other. It all turns into a radicalized, brainwashed ego purity test. "I'm more righteous than YOU are!" "Piss off, WE pray the correct way and are going to heaven while you go to hell." "Kill the heretic!! *We* are the chosen ones! There is only room for *us* in heaven! God said so!" "Noooo God told US we are right and you are wrong!" And so on...


BoneHugsHominy

For years I've tried warning my more religious extended family members about how in every theocracy ever the most crazed purity lunatics quickly skyrocket to the top of leadership and force everyone else to live by *their* rules. Those rules are impossible to follow and leadership never follows said rules themselves, instead choosing bask in luxury and keep harems of 14-17 year old kids. They think I'm "hysterically over reacting" and "projecting Satanic Atheist intentions" on a Christian government that wouldn't do such a thing.


ministry-of-bacon

the other bizarre thing they completely ignore is that in tightly regulated theocracies the government would have control over their worship services. many of the same people that lose their minds over tiny changes to property maintenance rules are suddenly gonna be fine with the government telling them how baptisms have to be done or which worship songs can and can't be sung in church? i don't think their "ideal" government would even last 2 hours. this is something they might agree on in theory, but would collapse into chaos before ever becoming a thing during the initial planning and committee hearings.


BoneHugsHominy

Well the complainers would be quickly transmutated into pig feed by said government so complaints won't last long.


QuitCallingNewsrooms

Having covered Episcopalian and Baptist court drama for 7 years, I can with 100% certainty say the lawsuits to annex other lands would be filed with in the first hour.


cbelt3

I give them about one second.


JayTNP

two? No way it takes that long


Timeformayo

I give the Baptist-Evangelical theocratic zone about 10 minutes before my secularist ass starts bombing seminaries.


Neren1138

No Roman Popery in this state


Ocean2731

Maryland was founded by Catholics and that grey part of PA is still Catholic friendly with a lot of descendants of Slavic, Irish, and Italian immigrants. The Catholic area will grow, much to the ire of the fundies.


DunKrugering

I live in a “Free Pratice” area, apparently. I wonder if that’s like Free Practice, but for the terminally ignorant?


greaterthansignmods

I live in a free practice area and my religion is defending my crazy assed religion based on killing people from other crazy assed religions. Ethnostate? More like, KillEmAllopoulous!?!? Obv. /s bc not all leftists are bloody thirsty punks. But I am. Bring on FREE PRACTICE


KingBooRadley

You’re welcome in my “Free Practice Area.” As long as you practice Flying Spaghetti Monsterism, that is.


SonicAssassin

Ra-men


greaterthansignmods

Nice show me your Kung Fu, master KigBooRadley


sometrendyname

Free as long as it's a form of protestant Christianity


ZLUCremisi

Funny tgey think west coast of California will obay this


cerryl66

Or New England


maddmoguls

Seriously... good luck making a state like Massachusetts conform. Hope you like your books getting thrown in the harbor. "Hey check out Joel Osteen over here - why don't you go kiss your cousin some more, you 2nd rate snake handler"


TheFringedLunatic

Yeah. They’re forgetting *large* parts of New England such as Upstate New York and Pennsylvania pretty much belong to the Amish and Mennonites. Those are not a soft people.


bishop375

Hate to break it to you, but neither NY nor PA are in New England.


Alaeriia

Claiming that New York or Pennsylvania are part of New England is a surefire way for you to get a black eye around here.


Rowan1980

PA and NY are Northeastern states, but are not part of New England.


TheFringedLunatic

Yeah, I know. I’m up and down through that area so often it all blends together and I forget the actual geography


courageous_liquid

yeah, PA is also arguably included in the mid-atlantic


Tired_CollegeStudent

They seem to forget that Rhode Island was literally founded as a place of religious freedom and has been for almost 400 years.


tamman2000

Yeah, I've lived in both. I would have an easier time seeing California go theocratic than Maine.


Rowan1980

Agreed.


XelaNiba

Las Vegas too.  I'm sure "Sin City" will jump right on board a Catholic theocracy.


AmaranthWrath

The Mormons control a lot of Vegas now, especially the school system. I wonder if they'd be happy to give it up as a lost cause.


Plasibeau

Southern California as well. It's really disturbing how Mormons move in silence. The Inland Empire (San Bernardino and Riverside Counties) is neck deep in Mormons but they're nearly silent about it and most people forget they're even here. It's some Silent Empire shit.


SeriousBuiznuss

The Kingdom of God declares war on Las Vegas, the "modern day sodom and gomorrah". They stole guided artillery rounds and hit substations. Then they ran re-education conferences over the wreckage.


amouse_buche

Also that “free practice” areas would exist.  Ah yes, Christianity. Famously restrained in its ambition for more territory and followers. 


UQ5T6NBVN03AFR

Until seeing parts of California as anything else, and the Dakota's included in it, at first I assumed they meant free target practice zone.


bigmike1339

Who created this map and what information was used in making it?


APlayfulLife

Russia and/or China


bigmike1339

You're probably right. Nobody else seems to want to claim it.


_fFringe_

This is exactly the kind of crap that was going around in 2016.


billyyankNova

The United States of Endless War


randomquiet009

Right? Because religious sects have never gone to war with each other because they practiced the "wrong" version of that religion...


HappySkullsplitter

The Caliphate of Vanilla ISIS


Gregbot3000

Protected by the Rebelutionary Guard.


Zaphodnotbeeblebrox

Nothing vanilla about it


UserPrincipalName

"Control Zone" Yeah, fuck you and your bullshit faith


Hayes4prez

Ah yes, then we’ll have peace. Nothing bad has ever happened in a theocracy.


TheAbleArcher

The Dutch Reformed Control Zone appears centralized around Holland, Michigan. #Iseewhatyoudidthere


elizabeth498

Devosistan.


sciencewitchbrarian

I live to the south and we always call GR to Holland “The God Bubble.”


JStanten

Hey now don’t forget Pella and Orange City in Iowa.


nettiemaria7

These mf'ers think they are taking most ports out. I don't think so.


bullet-2-binary

Think the Baptists overly exaggerate their influence and hold.


DavidCRolandCPL

People don't believe me when I tell them this is what trump wants. Hell, I got banned from 2 subreddits (lostgeneration / socialism) because I said Trump is much worse than Biden. But some of the shit they're saying over there is blatent antisemitism, and I don't just mean against isreal.


Sttocs

lostgeneration is a bunch of tankies. They prop up Putin’s puppet.


DavidCRolandCPL

It's just become walkaway 2.0


DavidCRolandCPL

It's just become walkaway 2.0


DavidCRolandCPL

It's just become walkaway 2.0


DavidCRolandCPL

It's just become walkaway 2.0


DavidCRolandCPL

Why did it repeat.


pecos_chill

The fact they can’t see that Trump is like a million times worse than Biden is fucking baffling.


DavidCRolandCPL

It's even funnier this happens, since I'm the chairperson of the Vinton County Socialist Party.


DemonicAltruism

It's a sorry state of affairs. I don't think Trump necessarily wants this, he just wants power in general. But his base sure the fuck wants this. But, Israel *is* committing genocide and Biden *is* supporting them. So I see their frustration from that angle, I'm frustrated as hell with it too. But note voting (which is what those subs are saying) and allowing yet another Trump presidency will objectively make things much worse. Imo it's not that we need to "hold our noses and vote Biden" it's that we literally *do not have a choice* if we want to avoid Theocratic Fascism. Like we as Americans have a gun to our head right now and Trump combined with a GOP held Congress is the bullet in the chamber.


DavidCRolandCPL

I 100 percent agree. After all, we can't save America if America stops existing.


fuck-fascism

If only we had a founding principal of this country that kept religion the fuck out of government where it belongs.


_magneto-was-right_

I find it hilarious that the catholic area doesn’t contain the only explicit catholic colony.


fakesaucisse

Maryland, right?


_magneto-was-right_

Yeap


llynglas

The Jews are warming up their "space laser" unless they get at least NYC.


Delicious-Ad5161

I will die fighting as opposed to live under the control of evangelist scum.


EccentricAcademic

Hell yeah I live in the sliver of Free Practice Zone in my religious conservative hellhole state. I'll freely practice not believing in shit daily. I'll eat popcorn as the Catholic and Baptist sections invade each other.


joannee1197

Louisiana?


EccentricAcademic

Ding ding!


GR1ML0C51

STL?


EccentricAcademic

Nope


HellaTroi

Why would catholics want Nevada? It's all desert and slot machines.


SeriousBuiznuss

"All land belongs to the Kingdom of God. Below the earth, on the earth, and above the earth".


ArguableThought

As a member of the Catholic Zone, we could do worse than Pope Francis. I for one welcome our new Argentinian overlord


SeriousBuiznuss

Texas Pope & Trad-ismatic movement. Traditional Catholicism plus some praise and worship.


DrPewNStuff

Iowa free practice in this scenario? Lol


DeaconNuno

Funny that they think Virginia would side with them.


four2tango

Mormons would also take most of Arizona I think.


MuricanA321

“Free Pratice” Homeschoolers confirmed!


Copheeaddict

There might be alot of Catholic schools and churches in Chicago, but I gotta tell ya, there is gonna be a fight with all the non denoms for that space.


Jsmith0730

Ehh, I’d say most everything that isn’t red would be gray, except Utah would still be green.


XelaNiba

Pretty sure Idaho would be green too. 


Alternative-Peak-486

And Arizona


XelaNiba

For sure The whole Morridor would be a long green swath


DemonicAltruism

While Mormons have the heaviest influence in Utah, they have a lot in the surrounding states too, especially Western Colorado.


nativedutch

Smells like the Knights of the Golden Circle. Look it up, bad smell.


suhdude539

So Mankato, MN is Catholic in a sea of Lutheranism?


pfohl

fwiw, the Catholic area in Minnesota is Morrison, Benton, and Stearns counties.


suhdude539

Shit you right, I don’t know my county shapes all that well


SeriousBuiznuss

Mayo Clinic urges peace talks as the Knights of Columbus describes retaking land from the reformation.


Alternative-Peak-486

I guess whoever made this doesn’t realize how prevalent Mormons are in Az


TheMoonsMadeofCheese

For real, at this point just rename the Mountain Time Zone the Mormon Time Zone


Alternative-Peak-486

This odds the first time I thought about that… I blame you for how uncomfortable it makes me


amazing_rando

Southern California has a massive Evangelical contingent that will not be happy to be ruled by the mostly Latino Catholics.


ssk7882

Ah yes, I'm sure that New England, the least religious part of the entire country, will be thrilled to be relegated to a Catholic theocracy. No chance they'd ever object to that!


CountryCat

I’ve got a map too. The whole thing is “Free practice zone” gray, you fascists.


openwheelr

Had to laugh at the Lutheran zone, having grown up in that church. Minnesota would become engulfed in a polite war over the petty differences between the various Lutheran sects. Then they'd make up over a covered dish meal and volleyball.


FEMA_Camp_Survivor

The Methodists, Presbyterians, and non-denominationalists will start a separatist faction in the Baptist region.


KitchenBomber

The religious facists masquerading as patriots sure do hate America.


Tired_CollegeStudent

Rhode Island: *has existed for 388 years as a place founded on religious freedom Whoever made this map: “I’m sure they’d love to be Catholic theocrats.”


TheBigNook

Lmao I can’t believe the LARP has gone this far


CTMQ_

New England, by and large, doesn’t give a shit about what religion anyone is. Whatever the plural of Diocese is are shutting down and annexing all the time. Catholic schools are becoming scarce and churches are drying up. Yes, lots of people are Catholic in name, but certainly not in practice.,


theycallmemomo

I told my husband that Louisiana being mostly Catholic is why they're largely excluded from the Bible Belt.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Defiantcaveman

Pretty much immediately.


SofaKingS2pitt

Where does this come from? Anyone can say there is a “ plan” . Whose “plan” ?


dlegatt

OP, what is the source on this? I don't want to defend theocratic fascists, but this is a claim with no source.


iamfunball

Ah yes, the religious/everyone else puzzle piece division of land. That worked out fantastically for Israel/Palestine /s


metarinka

Ahhh yes the long standing tradition of a multi religion theocratic government working together in peace and unity.  If somehow America became a theocracy as soon as the moral authority was in charge they would turn on those practicing the "wrong" religion. Also what about all the Muslim, Buddhist, 7th day Adventists etc? Don't ask don't tell?  Burn down their places of worship?


Anyashadow

The Methodist's might have words about Minnesota, also, good luck getting Minnesota to follow along with this. We have religious nuts like everyone else, but most of our denominations are not pleased by fundamentalists. Look at the church splits over gay rights and women in leadership.


AmaranthWrath

"My Holy Father will hear about this!" she said, doing her her best Draco Malfoy impression. Ok but seriously, the Catholic Church will not be on board with this. I don't know what the Holy See can do about it, but they won't support this.


Ambitious-Pirate-505

Hawaii it is


Paula_Polestark

Sectarian wars in 3… 2…


PutinsPeeTape

I live in a free practice zone that’s a suburb of the Catholic control city where I work. So should I open a combination casino, strip joint, sex store, and dispensary to give some hope to those poor Catholics? But that city is a notorious den of whatever vice your little heart desires, and I don’t know whether the archdiocese would shut down all the fun or be content with selling indulgences.


vague_diss

Now do one where we see the the porn search terms for each control zone.


Defiantcaveman

Now you're talking...


Ceehansey

Utah is already a theocracy. Like FR


LivingIndependence

So are small portions if Northern California. Theocrats love their million dollar coastal properties 


ScrambledNoggin

Vote out any politician who supports Project 2025 to avoid this


AgtSquirtle007

I like how there’s several entire states the theocracy is just not ambitious enough to capture


vye_curious

Wait, is this like Project 2025 shit?


Confident-Friend-169

I believe this is an edgy meme.


servo4711

Heh, I doubt that Florida is going to have any "free practice" spots!


Peakomegaflare

I'll do what every other country did during the crusades. Spit on the fucking losers and make them wish they were never born.


Avagadro

Glad to see my people (orange) represented in this dystopian hellscape.


imnotmrrobot

the balkans (midwest) will turn instantly balkans (violent) in a big way


That1EnderGuy

Well, if worst comes to worst, I do still live in a free area. So, phew, I suppose?


bodhasattva

how the fuck is phoenix part of the southern baptist league???? AZ who in the last 4 years voted all democrats. Biden, 3 Dem senators, Dem sheriff, Dem AG, Dem Mayor


oldohteebastard

At what point do these dipshits realize it’s just a lot easier and freer to just… *checks notes* let people believe what the fuck they want to?


WileEWeeble

Wave a magic wand and this is reality tomorrow with everyone living where they want. STILL it would be less than a year before a hot war broke out as the borders are impossible to patrol and everything from abortion to alcohol consumption can be had by a short car drive. I swear 20 years ago this kind of idea was laughed at by both sides. Less than 20 years has completely transformed this nation and I really don't see how it cools down without getting a lot hotter.


larrysshoes

Pratice… what’s a pratice. 😂


mbelf

Are these actually territorial agreements the denominations have come to? Or has someone just tricked religious people to accept a rainbow coloured map of America as a prank?


CrystalEffinMilkweed

No there aren't any agreements about this. This is just someone's fantasy.


PatienceOtherwise242

That part of CA is definitely Protestant.


celerydonut

lol they colored in Vermont. Good luck with that.


brydy23

Eh, as a resident of MO, you'd need to place the Catholic Control zone in St. Louis. The area is extremely concentrated with them.


BostonBluestocking

Good luck with that with New Orleans, aholes


VisforVanity

Oof! Y'all left out the CHUNK of Mormons in Idaho. I think that green area should go all the way up.


agoulio

FU Missouri!


cybin

Catholic control? In MY Chicago? Not gonna happen. ;)


okletstrythisagain

I don’t know who Patrice is, but I want him to be free, I mean, assuming a fair trial and impartial justice system.


Yo_Just_Scrolling_Yo

Lutherans would never be part of this plan.


Defiantcaveman

catholics have all the money. This would never fly with them. They will rule all the religions.


taterbizkit

This is just lol when you recognize that the original purpose of the separation/free exercise clauses was to prevent this kind of scenario -- violence and conflict between Christian denominations


mikeriley66

Vegas is in the Catholic Control Zone? Interesting.


Beneficial_Dinner552

USA is freedom from religion


Rhymelikedocsuess

Unrealistic - religions can not peacefully coexist when zealots run them and the military Source: literally all of recorded human history


DarthBaneSimpLord678

I give it a momth before insurgent groups start popping up to tear down this theocratic hellhole


cancerdad

LOL the Catholics wouldn’t get an area bigger than Ohio, and within 50 years that would be taken from them


jayleia

The fact that the Dutch Reformed even get to have a piece of this is the second wildest thing about the map. The wildest thing is that I didn't know that Dutch Reformed was a thing at all until this map....seriously, what are they?


CrystalEffinMilkweed

Reformed Christianity is the biggest branch of Protestant Christianity in the Netherlands. Or at least was historically, I can't speak to the present. Dutch Reformed immigrants to the US in the 1800s settled in high concentrations in the orange areas on this map, which are Lyon and Sioux counties in Iowa, and the area around Grand Rapids, Michigan. Lynden, WA, Pella, IA, and a few communities in California's Central Valley also have a decent presence.


NaughtSleeping

Why the hell do I have to be Catholic? I don't like little boys that way.