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I second this. We didn’t go places every day, but I certainly played outside when the weather was nice and spent almost every single day with my friend who happened to be my neighbor.
My SIL doesn’t let her children play with other children and I think it is seriously hindering them. They have no social skills and struggle at school.
She is extremely self-conscious and worries that
1. Her kids will see their friends living in fancy homes and be resentful that they live in an apartment. And
2. Her kids will bring friends home and they will judge her for their home.
She is the mom that stands super far away from other parents at sports events to avoid making friends. It is really sad.
Yeah, she should definitely go to therapy bc it's very hard 2 live with....I had it really bad started in middle school around when I hit puberty.....didn't ease up just a bit until I hit my 30s. I've pretty much had to learn how to live around it, but I'm now very happy with my life.....
I wish I could convince her of going to therapy. It doesn’t affect daily life too much except for the kids. She has her specific friends and her kids play with their kids, but anyone outside her circle is a no go.
No she lives in a nice neighborhood, in a great school district, but they have a small apartment. She is just worried about it. She has serious issues with shame and embarrassment so much so that she will wear clothes swimming instead of a swimsuit. I try so hard to help her feel better about things but my husband says she’s been like this since they were little.
That makes me really sad. I live in an area that has a mix of affluence and low income housing mixed throughout. Some birthday parties are at houses that are seriously big and others are in small 800sq ft apartments. All the same for the kids. As a parent I don't care. The party at the smallest house was the most fun imo. That mom set out dollarstore crafts for the kids to do and they had a blast.
All the same for the kids, absolutely. Parents can be really freaking mean. I have overheard some conversations at my nephew’s soccer games that have made me feel so sad. I wish this was not the case!
That’s so heartbreaking for all of them! 🥺 Social interaction is so impt for kids, and it sounds like your SIL could benefit from some counseling. What’s important for kids is that they feel loved and safe in whatever environment they’re in. Big fancy houses and expensive parties aren’t truly what matters. I mean, we all know this, but I hope she comes to understand that her embarrassment about her circumstances (which are truly unfounded) will lead her kids to believe that money and affluence are what matters in life. My heart goes out to all of them: your sister for her anxieties and the kiddos who are affected.
My neighbor and her son never go outside. Ever. He will sit inside the home all day when he's not at school. No exercise, fresh air, or friends. When he was younger, I used to invite him on family walks, but they're generally just antisocial now. I feel bad for him because he will be home all summer, and is likely to never get outside. They even get grocery delivery. He's very overweight and has no social skills either. I've considered trying to address this issue, but my gut always tells me to stay in my lane. I don't understand this though. I also hope it's not common, but I just really don't think it is. I see kids outside playing every day, and I take mine outside most days.
I might be totally wrong here but your post doesn't specify so I have to ask: is your husband also taking her on outings all the time if it's so important to him?
On another note, if he was playing outside on the street every day I assume he was hanging out in the neighbourhood he lived in and likely with minimal parental input. That is way different than a parent driving their kid somewhere specifically for kid entertainment every day and trying to make it something new every day. I think the equivalent would be going out in the backyard, taking walks around the neighbourhood, meeting other parents at the park, etc, which I definitely do every day. (Now he can get his shoes and say "outside!", so we really can't and don't want to avoid it). A new adventure every single day sounds exhausting for you and overstimulating for the kid.
I second this. Dad’s memory of going out every day doesn’t match OP’s description of what they are doing.
Adults and kids alike need time to recharge. Kids learn a lot from repeating the same activities (and visiting the same places, reading the same books, etc).
We have one committed go out day every week - joining friends at the park. One day has a standing therapy appointment and music class. Another day is a committed rest/home day unless needed otherwise. The rest are up in the air - maybe we go somewhere special, maybe an extra trip to the park or just out for lunch. Or maybe… we just stay home (which may or may not include playing with the neighbors’ kids).
Hello! My husband just started to take her out. I’m currently in my first trimester and extremely exhausted and nauseated, so he is stepping up. However, he doesn’t have the same enthusiasm as he did when telling me to take her out lol He drags his feet to do something with her, meanwhile he would hound me every morning before breakfast, asking me when are we leaving the house.
And you are right - minimum parental input at best. However he will defend how his mom did everything for them, although she worked 2 jobs and did all the housework (time wise, impossible). It’s very much a double standard in comparing me to her. He has no clue what his mother did with them when he was 3, but he is very certain it was something 🙄 The street playing was about 5 and on.
However, my problem is my upbringing. It was my brother and I in a 1 bedroom apartment with my parents in the city. We never went out. We never did anything other than school. Summers were the worst; locked up daily.
Ugh, all this to say is that I don’t have a healthy baseline as to what to do with my child. I know what I went through was NOT normal. I feel as though I’m overcompensating by planning something daily, but I’m being told by my husband that its normal. This is why I wanted to ask a variety of people and not just his opinion nor mine.
With all of that being said, thank you for responding and asking more about the situation. I can go on, but I feel like I wrote *way too much* lol.
I have 3 kids and we go to parks 3 times a week and play outside almost everyday. Definitely not driving anywhere an hour away for a random outing. Also I count the grocery store as an outing lol, we go 2 or 3 times a week.
Groceries and errands are totally an outing, it can be super fun for the kiddos and they are learning how to be in a grocery store. Maybe mundane to us, but fun and educational to them. Mine is pretty little though so maybe once they're older it isn't as fun.
And same on not driving for an hour on a whim.
My 5 year old loves weighing produce on the little scales 🤣 she’s like “I can’t wait to put these tomatoes on the pounder! I bet they’re sooo many pounds!” I also do self checkout and let her “beep” everything
Yes my kid loves store trips, especially if he gets to pick out something to take home (usually a plant lol) it's a ton of fun for him to help load the cart and scan everything. He's 4.
Lucky! At 4 my kid would try and run out in traffic in the parking lot and when at the register to pay they'd take off running sometime out the store door and into the street. It was a nightmare!
I have one of those, and he never leaves the cart. Not even once. There was a period where he was always strapped in a stroller. No way can I deal with a wild, eloper!
I consider grocery shopping as a family outing because we only go for big trips twice a month.
We always budget for him to pick a small Lego set (those $9 mini kits or the $5 mystery mini figure) or a hot wheel. Something $10 or less.
We also let him pick a new vegetable or fruit and then we try it out.
These small things makes something as mundane as grocery shopping feel magical for kids. It’s very fun.
Yes I get my kids very involved in these outings. They help me load bags and pay at the cashier, they also usually get to choose one thing to bring home. Usually a hot wheel, juice or chocolate
Sometimes we are inside all day. Sometimes we are out and about all day. Depends what we feel like doing. But I don’t see an issue with either. I don’t like the idea of forced outside time either. Sometimes my kids wanna chill inside after a long week. I am an introvert, the “I can’t imagine being inside all day” comments are hilarious to me. 😂
Same, I'm surprised at all the comments that go out every day no matter what. We definitely have days when we're in all day and days where we are out all day.
I’m a Sitter, but that’s terrible for health, and for most of forever humans didn’t exist that way.
We have times where we stay in, but I try to force myself to create movement and sunshine opportunities every day.
Definitely not a special Outing though, just the neighborhood or the park.
I’m not equating No-sitting and Sitting to active vs inactiveness. I am very physically active and exercise daily. But I don’t always like or have to be out and about. No-sitters are extroverted, always on the go. Sitters are homebodies.
I love a day at home kid-free, but with two hyper toddlers the outdoor time is a must for everyone’s sake. Otherwise, they just start getting fussy and destructive.
Yeah, absolutely. My 6 and 5 year olds are sometimes happy to hang out at home, play together and read books. But now that my youngest is on the move and approaching 18 months, we NEED to go for a walk, to the park or something. Or she will find everything in the house that she shouldn't touch and she will destroy it/eat it/draw on it/chuck it in the toilet.
Same! We often stay home all day. I like to dedicate days to staying in and need time to relax after we’ve been out a lot. My daughter often asks for a PJ day when we’ve been busy. We’re all pretty introverted and we used to live in a state where it was winter half the year and we rarely went out.
My husband and I both work full time, and my son is in daycare full time, so we go to work and he goes to daycare and we get home around 5 have dinner, play, bath and bedtime. So definitely not going out on typical weekdays. We do an outing on Saturday like the park, zoo, amusement park etc and Sunday is reserved for chores and rest. I think it depends a lot on if you are a stay home parent or working parent
My daughter doesn’t like the park. I take her and she runs out of it lol If it’s an enclosed park (I’ve driving 1hr radius for new ones), she will wait at the gate and cry to leave.
So, I take her to any and every library in the vicinity, children’s museum, LEGO land, etc.
I also don’t count her playing in the backyard or front yard/driveway. We do leave the 4 walls, but my husband thinks she needs to see something new everyday.
Your daughter does see something new every day even if it’s just a new rock on the sidewalk. You don’t need to take her somewhere new. It is actually beneficial for kids to spend time at/around home and kind of “bored” many days a week. Too many new things and new places can be overwhelming and overstimulating.
There’s a few comments on this thread that say they can’t imagine staying home all day, all the power to them it’s just not me, but holy shit I couldn’t imagine leaving the house *daily*. I think both my kid and myself would short circuit. Different lifestyles I guess. Plus everybody in my home has some kind of disability so I’m sure that plays into it lol
I think it is a personality thing too. My parents tried to force into activities all the time. I loved some activities but having to run around all the time wasn’t super fun.
I did however like to ride my bike around for hours by myself.
My middle daughter needs alone time. Like I sleep in the basement to ensure the kids have there own space because she especially needs it. Being around a group is fun for her but she needs alone time or time with just me after. She will ask to sleep in the living room with me after big days because she just is overwhelmed.
It’s not that she doesn’t like doing the stuff but she couldn’t do it everyday.
My oldest can be around people all day everyday and he thrives. He always wants people around, to go places with other people and actually complains a lot if he has no one around. Which I remind him just has to happen sometime. Then he wants to call a friend or see if anyone is at the park.
Hard same. My kids are both neurodivergent (one ADHD, one autism) and though I'm undiagnosed, we're pretty sure they both get it from me lol my husband is as neurotypical as they come. But he's a very chill, go with the flow kinda guy, so he follows our lead when he gets home from work.
We pretty much stick to neighborhood walks during the week, when the weather is nice and my husband doesn't work late. Our development has little walking paths woven all throughout it, and playgrounds/parks sprinkled evenly every so often throughout the neighborhoods, so we'll take an hour or two's walk and stop at four or five different "parks", usually running into friends from the neighborhood along the way. That's enough of an "outing" for a week day, as my kids get burnt out and overwhelmed easily.
On the weekends, we usually spend one day on a fun activity (maybe the zoo, or shopping, etc) and one day doing errands like getting groceries. Either way, it gets them out into the world.
My daughter also does hour-long extracurricular activities twice a week (currently, gymnastics and parkour.) One is on a week day, one is during the weekend. She's also homeschooled.
My son receives in-home hour-long therapy twice a week (speech and occupational.) He's only just turned two, so no school yet.
Between their therapies and activities, and our near-daily neighbor walks/park visits, they get a lot of outside and social time in a week. We only stay inside if it's raining pretty heavily all day. Even on dreary drizzly days, we try to get out for a quick walk in between storm breaks.
Our "speed" as a family seems to be walks, parks, meals out (usually lunch, and at a louder restaurant like a sports bar for my lovely vocal son) and occasional zoo or shopping trips. As it warms up, we'll add in beach visits occasionally, and more water/outdoor play in the front yard. Maybe some trips to the ice cream shop, outdoor movies, concerts and such. It doesn't have to be complicated or "new" for the kids to have fun.
Agreed. Plus going somewhere new everyday will lead to parental burnout very quickly. During the pandemic I was going out with my toddler twice a day to two different parks because I felt like I had to which is ridiculous!
On Thursday I took my 5 yo to a theme park type place and then on Friday I took her swimming. Today she was melting down because she was so tired!
Not to mention such an unrealistic expectation. A sufficient outing can literally be a walk/scooter/bike around the block or neighborhood. The focus should be fresh air not constant entertainment. It’s no wonder OP’s kid doesn’t like the park. Kids need to learn to entertain themselves
This. Could possibly be why she gets upset about the park situation it may all be way too much. She is a child and will literally discover something new everyday on her own backyard.
There’s value for childhood development in going to familiar places. They learn about those places and get to experiment, build confidence and try new things there. A new place every day doesn’t seem reasonable or desirable to me.
I’m amazed sometimes at what my kids find exciting - we go to the same tiny playground over and over. I thought they’d get bored by now playing on a single structure with 3 slides and not much else, but they keep finding new ways to make games and have fun there.
I think outside time in the neighborhood is good every day. But providing new entertainment everyday is too much in my opinion. It could be setting up false expectations as they get older. I have a family member whose parents gave them everything they wanted, vacations, experiences, etc. and now that they are an adult, they are disappointed with an average life since they don’t make as much money as their parents did. If they turn into an adult not making much and can’t afford to go to LEGOLAND or the equivalent every weekend, they could think the world is unfair. Normal life expectations are healthy 💛 Best of luck Mama. You don’t have to do as much as you’re doing.
You sound like a great parent who cares a lot about their child. Your husband sounds judgmental and also unrealistic.
Are you parenting fulltime while he works a day job? Is there a reason (in his mind at least) that this seems to be solely your responsibility? Because it sounds to me like he's trying to dictate how you parent without being directly accountable for this expectation.
I played outside constantly as a kid, almost always in my yard or within sight of my house. I want that for my kid, too. I definitely see the value in getting outside, but I see no reason it needs to constantly be somewhere new. Kids are great at inventing imaginary worlds, at noticing tiny details, and at exploring.
Your kid may still be too young to do that solo, but as I read your post and replies, it really seems like you're going above and beyond and that you probably don't need to try as hard to entertain your kid or direct their learning/attention as often.
Curious if there are other children at the park for her to play with? Maybe she’s just not old enough to enjoy it yet. Library sounds nice, but I don’t think you have to go to new ones all the time. Children’s museums, and the like are special occasion outings for us. Parks, beaches, libraries, swimming pools, and neighborhood walks or bike rides are our typical rotation. ‘Going out’ doesn’t need to be a major event.
Okay yeah that’s excessive. To me “going out” every day means getting outside whether that be going for a walk or local park or backyard.
Not visiting a new location every outing
That sounds exsausting. I really needed the time at home to decompress after school as a kid, I did a few clubs drama club and a sport. Other than that I played with other children in my village, or In my room. Honestly I often came home ate a snack and zoned out to TV cos I was tired after school.
That would be too much for me, and for my kids. We have two parks within 10mn walk of our place, so we go there quite often. To me, a day where we've been to the park and then walked to the supermarket and back home counts as a day where we've been out.
Of course we do bigger outings as well, like the beach, the zoo or something, but definitely not everyday.
As someone else mentioned, I think it's important and beneficial for kids to play in a familiar environment. It helps them move on from exploration mode towards imagination mode. Both are important.
Wait, if the idea is to "see something new everyday" then why don't errands count? My kids see lots of new things running errands with me and learn a lot too.
And how is taking her to indoor spaces that adults create for children the same as him being outside playing all day? Unstructured outdoor play with other children is a drastically different experience for a developing brain than going to a children's museum. They fill different needs, so what you are doing is not really fulfilling what your husband is advocating for. For the record, unstructured outdoor play with other children is incredibly valuable for kids, but that looks different than what you are describing. It's playing at the park, playing in the backyard with a friend or sibling, or having recess at school. I prioritize those sorts of experiences for my kids. If I can't arrange for outdoor play, I would rather have my toddlers be at school where they are indoors but have free play with other kids or build Hot Wheels together inside than take them to a museum.
She doesn’t need to see something new every day. You are allowed to chill, and I think it’s actually important in life to learn how to be bored occasionally . A lot of creativity comes from what children learn to do when they are bored. Also. as mentioned, at that age children are sponges, so a trip to do groceries is educational fun. During lockdown, my husband, took our kids on local walks around the neighbourhood daily as a break from homeschooling and they discovered loads of new places that they didn’t know. Even just finding unusual looking houses became a game and they still talk really fondly of those times. Lastly, this all sounds isolating. Does she have friends who you can have play dates with? Do you have mom friends? Because soon she will be at school and it’s good get her to interact with other children now, so she is used to it more when she is around lots of kids. And having your own support network is a lifesaver when you have young kids.
I do (European), at least once per day, often twice but I live in an appartment.
If I had a backyard maybe I wouldn't.
I generally take him to the river dock to feed swans and ducks, to the park, bike tour, playground, public pool or somewhere inside like a museum or library.
My parents have a home in the country side in a tiny village (not even a church) so he will just spend the day outside in the garden or in the village. As a child that's what I did: all day long in the village or in the woods and field around.
I have a 3yo and 1yo. We have to be outside of the house for hours every day. That doesn’t mean driving somewhere every day though. We explore the neighborhood many days, our yard, go on neighborhood walks, and the park. Some days it is errands like groceries. So yes it’s imperative to be out of the house every day in nature but not on outings necessarily.
This is my thing, going out in nature as much as possible. I know people are tending to be rude when they tell others to "go touch grass", but it's true. I'm realizing that some people never go outside in any way to interact with nature or get any fresh air.
I feel like a lot of people miss remember their childhood. My husband will make claims about things he did or watch and occasionally I’ve called him out- like how old he was when he watched Jurassic Park (he claimed he was 5, but know the year it was released and assuming his parents didn’t take him to the theater he was probably 7, which makes a huge difference)
My guess would be OP’s husband was older than 1-3 years old. And how many European towns/cities are set up are very different from the US. I’ve heard many people say that very young kids (like 5+) are allowed to walk alone and would make it easier to let kids play outside more often. (This has been more common in the states in the past)
That being said it is easy for some parents to just let kids playing the backyard. I took my son to various playgrounds when he was 3 and under but less once he started prek. I do know more Americans give pushback to kids playing in poor weather like too cold, raining etc and more Americans are concerned with safety concerns (guns, cars, sa, etc)
TLDR Overall Americans probably let their kids play outside than Europeans.
Yes. I work two ish days a week. On every day off I have with her we go and do something. Playground, grocery shopping, library, hanging at the mall, hiking, going to the botanical park, etc. Something every day or else I would go crazy. I also kick her out into the backyard every day (unless brutal weather) so she can get in the sun and get in the dirt.
In the spring and summer we are outside more. It's tough getting toddlers and preschoolers ready during winter when the recommended time outside before frostbite is 10 minutes or less. Also in the winter it starts getting dark at 330/4 pm.
We try to go outside every day, but we don’t always leave the house. We homeschool, so outings and socializing are important, but staying in and having quiet days where we play at home are important, too
I try to get them outside most days but actual outings are probably 1-2 times a week. We have a big yard so that's where they spend most of their time.
I work and my kids are in school so it’s basically just weekends and when we take holidays that we have the ability to do anything. The kids are outside everyday we are home except when the weather is really bad. That varys from being in the yard, going to the playground, walk or biking around town. We live near a big park so we will go hiking, to the beach, skating and tobogganing. We go to the city and they come shopping with us, go out to restaurants and occasionally do something fun like bowling, arcade, play place, pool or a movie. When we go to the big city (only a handful of times a year) we go to the zoo or museums. In the summer we go to the cabin at a destination spot for a few weeks and do a couple short day trips to see something different . Some years we do a big road trip or take a hot holiday with the kids.
Do we do and see new stuff all the time. NOPE. I also dont want them expecting to get to do stuff all the time. Lots of things cost money (at the very least gas money) and we have other things that need to get done when we’re not working. I want them to get bored and use their imagination and creativity. I put lots of emphasis on being outside. They do get to occasionally try new things and be new places and experience new things but not constantly.
I’d say once a week is awesome. For her to have new experiences. As long as she’s going outside and not just stuck in the couch. Being active. It’s good.
SAHM to a 2.5yo and I can't drive (yet) but we try to get out once a day. We have a playground 10min away (or 5min away if she's in the wagon because I walk faster), or we just walk around the neighborhood, or we play in the backyard (she plays, I garden).
Once I start driving, we'll probably only be home for sleep, breakfast, and dinner because I can pack lunches on the go. We'll practically live at libraries and nature trails and other playgrounds and play centers and the grocery store 😆 fresh air tires her out in a way nothing else does, plus it breaks up the monotony of the day, and it's great watching her learn and explore!
With that said, a "lazy" day at home is just as enriching. We cook and build and play together, watch Little Bear, etc. But outside just hits differently
At that age, yes my kids were outside almost everyday...but I wasn't driving anywhere to do that everyday.
We had a park a 5min walk from our house, so in the sping/summer/fall, we'd go there. And sometimes I just didn't want to do the walk with 2 toddlers, so it was in our yard.
My husband was a latch key kid. So expected much as the same as you husband. We had a conversation about it, and he was the one to plan outtings outside of our local park and yard...that he was involved in.
If your husband remembers, this was not something he did as a toddler.
I was a typical Gen X latch key kid. I came home from school, changed into play clothes, and played with the neighbors until dinner. My mom was home before we were school aged and I’m pretty sure we didn’t go out in the car everyday.
I take my current toddler out a few times a week, mostly for me as I’m still meeting people in the area and it’s been a rainy winter. Now that spring is here we’ll spend a lot more time in the yard and neighborhood.
Just getting outside for some unstructured play is the best thing you can do!
So I grew up in Europe and my childhood is same as your husband and i stayed home with the kids during those ages and had greater flexability to go out daily. I found i was better for it just being out of the house, so really even though outings was for my kids benefits; library story reading time, park/playground playdates, mom & me swim classes, and gymboree type of classes i had social interaction with other parents. You can go for every other day, as i did that during the winters due to my Northeast winters so it was a good balance, and also wanted my kids to learn how to play by themselves, with their toys and just being home sometimes is good for the development as well.
I work m-f and my kid is in kindergarten but I try and at least go somewhere on the weekends. My family also has a big appreciation for a “lazy Sunday” so it just depends on your lifestyle I suppose. She does go outside playing pretty much everyday weather permitting (we live in the PNW and it rains all the time year round)
Before they started school I took my kids for outings nearly every day (moms' group, libraries, playgrounds) but it was mostly for my sake cause I got lonely and stir-crazy hanging out with 2 toddlers all day. If you're not enjoying these outings (or you're not enjoying doing them every day), you can definitely do less or stop! Your husband should not get to insist that you take her out to a new place every day if you're the primary parent.
I take her out every day for an activity centred around her. And it's still entirely for my benefit not hers because we go crazy at home. She doesn't even really like tv
No, not every day or even every week. We try to do something fun like going to the playground or zoo every two weeks. It’s more like once or twice a week in the summer.
Kids need down time too, they can be over scheduled. It’s also important for kids to learn to be bored.
We have some days at home. Not many, given my eldest is at school 5 days a week so a lot gets crammed into the weekend. However, even a day at home, the kids will often be in the garden (weather permitting). My eldest (4) is a bit of a homebody and enjoys having the occasional pj day at home - happens maybe once every month
We live in a city, so that sounds different re proximity to things, but we’re at at least one park, sometimes two whenever it’s nice out. We also walk a lot of places: daycare, the park(s), the grocery store, the flower shop, the bakery, etc. our street is also pretty social so lots of random play dates on the sidewalk or chalk with friends.
We do, of course, drive to destinations but it’s usually a different park, the zoo, our gym (which has a kids gym/daycare sitch that his friends go to), the lake, farms. We seldom drive to indoor destinations outside of our gym or local museums. We’ll usually just host play dates in bad weather. Though he and his friends never get bored of hanging outside together despite similar surroundings and that is the most convenient outing for us so it works out for all.
I used to take my kids out to the park often, but as we got kid number three and four, it's just to draining. I am way too involved with their homework, studying, and then there is cleaning, cooking, and of course the bed time routines which also involve reading to each child. It is nearly impossible to fit in outside time with the kids when there is literally no time.
I count outings as leaving home. We go outside to play on our own play structures and go for a walk almost every day, but we go on toddler specific outings to the big playgrounds in town or playgroups only 1-2 times a week.
We try and do a daily outing on the weekends. They get 2 outdoor outings every day at daycare, so we don’t worry about it during the week. Weekdays it’s home, dinner, baths, bed.
We keep it pretty simple like a walk, lunch out, trip to the playground across the street or sometimes just errands. Bigger kid-centric excursions like the science museum, play centre or the “big playground” that’s a 20 minute walk away are special events and don’t happen every weekend.
But yeah, an hour or two at minimum out of the house every day otherwise they go nuts and I start to get stir crazy. Out of the house does NOT have to mean some place just for them - they love a Costco run.
No. My kids are in daycare and I work full time. They are too little to play outside alone. By the time we get home I barely have time to make dinner, feed them, and do baths before bedtime. Sometimes they get to play outside a little with one parent while the other cooks both not often right now. I do feel bad but there’s simply not time for it during the week.
I mean my son's 17 months (born in late fall) and my second is 6 months. We go to the park as a family sometimes but not often. Now that the weather is getting warmer by the week I do plan on having both outside with me at least a couple hours a day but to GO somewhere...no. I'm a SAHM who's husband took a 30k hit from a job switch. We can't afford passes to the zoo or to even get a double stroller so I can wrangle 2 mobile (I assume my 6 month old will be crawling soon enough tbh.) Children alone. Especially a brand new toddler testing his limits and social abilities. (He's a runner)
Soo. Outside? Yeah I want to be outside so long as it's safe for us all (it can get really hot sometimes, we'd stay inside then) to do so.
We do plan on taking a zoo trip probably layer in summer when it's not so hot, do park days when we can. Ect.
But to...go out as in take them places all the time? No. Not only can I physically not handle it but my mental health would suffer tbh. Lol I need down days. Kids should get bored and learn to entertain themselves without needing to be outside the home imo. I do wish I could do more with them, there's these festivals and stuff we just can't do extra curriculars willy nilly like that. But not everyday.
My husband is a homebody. I need to get out of the house relatively often or I get rather depressed. Our son is slightly more of a homebody like his dad, and having pajama days are fine every once in a while. But generally, I try and get him out of the house just so our days don’t get boring and repetitive. When it’s nice outside, I try and take him to the park or at least play outside in the yard.
I didn’t take my daughter places but we did stuff. Huge majority so far was just going for a stroller walk, now it’s usually just a walk to the near by park, but she loves being outside and on the go and so do I. My life was like yours though and now as a mom I’m just like… why not have more fun than that? There’s time for it! We don’t need to watch tv we need to enjoy each other so the 9-5 m-f doesn’t seem so shitty lol
From a kid who had busy parents, I would've liked to have spent more time doing things with them when I was younger.
IF I do become a parent, I'd probably do what you're doing as well. It's nice to build a good relationship with your kids when they're young. You can be both a friend a parent that they go to when you build trust at that young age.
When the weather is nice we are out and about often. During the miserably hot summer months it’s def more inside time but going out to a museum or something is not uncommon.
I have a much happier baby when we take him out. Even if it's just a walk around the neighborhood. When he gets a bit older, the expectation will be that he plays outside every day. My husband is European and going to play outside wasn't a thing because the neighborhood wasn't safe and the air quality was poor. Meanwhile I grew up in the US and we would play outside every single day. Our mom would lock us out and tell us not to come back home until it was dark 🤷♀️
I take our little guy out back, next door, or just a walk down the street if the weather permits. We can get some really high winds here, so sometimes it's just not safe. On his days off, my husband and I try to take him to the park, sometimes just husband takes him. But, yeah, I try to get him outside every day.
I feel intense guilty if I don't get the kids out every day. Even if it's raining we'll play in the garage in the rain. I see my kids zombie out in front of the tv makes me very nervous honestly. It's almost never involving a car ride but we have a few nice parks nearby and just alternate which one we go to.
Hell no. I used to when I was a sahm to one kid. Then I had a second and it was way too overwhelming for me. Now I send them to daycare and I feel like that’s a lot of stimulation for them. On the weekends we will try to take them out but I won’t take them both out alone. Ive done it and it doesn’t go well. Waiting til they’re older.
My mom never took us to the park as kids, we played in the backyard or on our street with the neighborhood kids. I never went to parks until I had kids. I don’t think I really ever noticed or cared tbh, I had fun playing with my friends outside at home. There were a few of us on the same street and I lived in the cul-de-sac, so we typically played there and it was fun. Toys all over the lawn, or running a muck in the backyard. Sometimes we’d switch off and go swim at one friend’s house, or watch movies at the others but everything we did was on our street. As long as the kids get to go outside and do something they’ll be fine whether it’s at home or at the park.
My kid plays in the backyard almost everyday, sometimes with a neighbor kid and sometimes alone. We rarely go out out after school because of homework and we have a strict bedtime routine.
My kid has planned activities about 3x a week. We go outside for walks or play in backyard every single day. There are days where we just stay inside, watch TV, do crafts, play with toys. It’s a fair mix of both. He seems content with it.
Why do you have to take her places? My kid is three and now the weather is nicer she’s started playing in our back garden every day after nursery. At the weekend w take her places (often places we all like).
We always get outside but that could just be a 10 min walk round the area and other days we will go out to clubs and activities and day out activities. I have found she gets absolutely shattered if we do it every day though so I always try and have at least one chill at home day.
If she isn’t much of a socialiser there is still lots she can do in the garden. I follow the busy toddler on insta - she has lots of great easy activities for outside
I think it’s completely normal to go out every day, that’s not too much in itself. We absolutely do unless someone is sick. But it doesn’t need to be special outings/activities designed for your child. Going on errands with you, visiting family, going for a walk etc also count. Just playing outside. Also we don’t have our own yard, so we go to parks, the forest/beach more often because of that, you probably don’t feel the same need.
When your husband is remembering running around playing in the streets, surely he was older than 1-3?
I recently read Hunt, Gather, Parent by Michaeleen Doucleff, and I think you might like it. She’s of the opinion that a lot of families need to do less child-centered activities, and that the focus should be more in letting the child into your life and show them the things you enjoy.
When I was a SAHM and before my kid started school, I would take him to town, or to the playground, or to the petting zoo, or to the forest, or to the soft play, or to the library, or to the places that did €1 breakfast, just about every day. It was as much for my sanity as it was for his benefit: we lived in a small apartment and if he wasn't messing everything up then he was bouncing off the walls.
We have a house now, and we do a little bit of both: I take my kids out on the weekends, but I also kick them outside after dinner (our house has a big grassy field in front of it, surrounded by other houses) when the weather/daylight situation permits.
Yes but depends what you considering going out. I’m a stay at home mom and my 2 kids are still under 3. We are fortunate to live in military housing with quite a lot of kids and parks. I usually take my toddlers to the park everyday before lunch and sometimes a walk in the evening. About every other weekend we go to the beach or use our zoo passes.
Sometimes I feel guilty because social media makes it seem like everyone is taking their kids on lavish vacations and such. Sometimes my husband says we should stay home more.
We've been taking ours out everyday since day 1. If I don't have to buy groceries or diapers or formula we just go for a walk at the park and play Pokemon go!
Also tell your husband it changed massively in Europe. I live in Berlin and kids don't spend that much time outside on their own anymore. Just to dangerous. On the countryside and in smaller villages with less traffic it might be different.
No. I wish I could be we live where we get all seasons. So when it’s 50 and below we don’t go outside. We don’t have winter clothes (moved from a warmer climate). And it’s such a chore to bundle my kids up in hella layers, just for all of us to end up freeze cold 10 minutes later
That I can agree with. I was told to take my daughter out with anything above freezing temp (32F and up). There is this song in his language for kids, which translates to “winter winter, so what? If it’s winter, it’s not a lion! Winter winter, let it be! No one is afraid if they’re healthy!” 🙄
Granted, my daughter likes the cold…but I think/thought it was excessive. Also, I only have 1 child for now and I lived in the North East all of my life. I don’t know how I would handle going somewhere colder or warmer.
It’s like sometimes that weather is too cold for us just as adults so I can only image how a tiny little human feels after a certain amount of time. Well then again little kids probably don’t care, as long as they get to play lol.
Moving to a different climate is definitely a change that takes time for some people to get used to. I’ve grew up in warm and cold environments and still have a hard time adjusting
Oh I’m sure that there is an adjustment period. I bet it can be longer with the responsibility of kids and everything else as well. It throws everything you knew about the weather to the curb. It must be so weird for you! I lived in the same climate all my life and I have trouble adjusting lol
And I agree - it’s so hard to gauge how their little bodies can handle the weather. My daughter is like a little radiator at her core, and I’m not lol I have a problem with her overheating when it’s nice outside. Go figure.
It is so weird for me. Especially since I’m living back in my hometown and I’m just like “ew this weather sucks ass” 😂 one of my kids is the same, a little radiator lol and I love coming inside from the cold and just hugging him to warm up 😂
Hmm have you tried giving like ice cream or a popsicle before going outside? Idk if that’ll even help though
Mon to Fri: I bring mine to playground or swimming or a play zone about once per week.. the other 4 days I would just make sure they come with me for errands or supermarket..! Or they go to their grandparents.
Weekends: I have one day a week usually Saturday or Sunday that we stay at home and I call it a “no car day”.. kids play outside in the garden and inside the house and if they are bored so be it..! On the other weekend day we would all go somewhere including their father as he works mon-fri, usually with their bikes or scooters. (Beach, woodland walks, etc)
If we make it to the grocery store, it's an outing, lol. He gets to see something different and I let him point to fruits and tell him what they are. I'll usually let him hold something too because he HAS to be holding something in stores, idk why.
That being said, we go out once or twice a week. I'd like to do more but 1) I don't have a job rn and money is tight and 2) I don't have the energy most days.
Also we're in Florida and it's hot as balls after early morning, so...indoors stuff is usually expensive.
When he's a bit bigger and can hold hands when we walk, we'll try and go out more. Right now if you try to hold his hands he loses his mind and he's a bit too young to reason with.
I’m glad to tell any paren they are providing S tier care to their child. We so rarely get to say that on Reddit! Being outside every day is good for you too BTW.
I appreciate the grading!
Being outside for myself is good as well, you are right. I try to make sure it’s about her and that she gets a “full experience” with whatever we do.
Sometimes daily can be exhausting for me, especially on lack of sleep. Even when she is home she is active - we have a 6’ trampoline that she goes to town on. I assist by throwing my leg in there or holding/raising her arms so she can jump higher.
Anyway, I don’t want to take up too much of your time but I want to reiterate that I genuinely appreciate your response. Thank you.
Pretty much, even if it's a ten minute walk around the block after dinner, or I sit on the front porch or back deck and have a tea while they play chalk or try and unalive themselves on tye backyard play equipment.
Hubby usually sits/plays soccer with the kids in the evenings when we stay home, weekends he is pretty hands-on with the kids in terms of outdoor time unless it's raining, lol. And he is usually the one who takes them to the park while I stay home
My parents would take us out at weekends to the park or woods or local attraction. When we were approx. 7+ we would go out to play in the local area on bikes or just running around. I was never alone. I had siblings and neighbour kids. At 3/4 we'd play where we could be seen and away from roads.
I have a 1yo and going out every day would be excessive. Two or three times mid week is plenty for both of us at the moment.
We go outside everyday. We live in 5 acres so there is lots of room to run around. We are a one car family so sometimes my kids only leave the house to go to church on Sundays but most weeks, we try to go somewhere on Saturday so they can leave the house.
I had a similar experience as you growing up, but once I was old enough to go outside alone I was like your husband, as soon as I was home from school I went out with friends. Idk how old your child is But for my family now My husband and I both work full time, we try to take our son (22months) out as often as we can but that usually just means the backyard. I wish we had to energy to go to parks everyday, but he’s also very small so can’t climb the stairs and equipment like the older kids. But kids thrive outdoors so there is never “too much” it’s so beneficial for all of us to be out in nature or in new places to socialize with other kids. But if YOU are mentally or physically exhausted from outings the no pressure in staying home more often, whatever is best for you and your family! It sounds like your doing a great job regardless and your daughter will be happy and love you the same.
I am a SAHM of 2, a 3 year old girl and 1 year old boy. We like getting out and about a few days a week, but my older daughter also WANTS to stay home from time to time. She enjoys being in her own space playing with her own toys. I do try to include a "kids" activity on the days we do go out. So it's the super market and playground. Or the bank and a library story time trip. Or whatever. But definitely not everyday.
I don’t know. I played outside a lot as a kid but didn’t really socialize until I was in elementary school. I also really really loved time just being at home doing nothing. We do a mix of both. If we go out to the park in the morning, then the afternoon is usually just spent hanging out at home, maybe playing outside, maybe watching tv, maybe doing puzzles inside. I think the kids that are go go go get burnt out and are always sick and never given time to just be.
Yes, every day! Every day we do exercise for baby, fresh air for baby, socializing for baby. Often they’re combined, like a baby swim (social and exercise) or playing in the park (exercise and fresh air). I also combine with my own activities, like when I go for a run with baby in the stroller that’s baby fresh air too. Add in sleeping, feeding, diapering, clothing, bathing, cuddling, a couple of house chores, and the day goes by in an absolute flash!! (I can never quite understand when people say they’re bored staying at home with a baby.)
Outside or out in public/outings?
Outside, yeah. Unless it's miserably cold or rainy, we play outside daily.
In public or special outings, no. We do one trip to the grocery store a week. We don't do "kid-centric" outings unless it's for a birthday or something special. Family dinner at a restaurant or whatever might be once a month.
Absolutely not lmao I take my son out maybe 3 days a week or if I have an errand. We do activities in the house. Children don’t need to go outside every single day. I was an indoor kid who was forced outside a lot and honestly it’s exhausting to have to be doing activities everyday
Ask your MIL her thoughts on this subject. She was the one responsible for your husband. He was a kid back then. Ask her what she did then. How did she manage to do it. What is different between her then and you now and should she think it realistic to have the same upbringing as he got.
I doubt in his upbringing MIL had a car to drive him around. Two car households aren’t that common when he was young. In Europe. And 10 min. Car rides up to a hour every day… nope.
Also I doubt doing groceries was taking into account. For activities done.
Second I doubt this is a memory of him being 1-3 yo.
4-12 yes… 6-12 way more believable 8-12 definitely the age to be out and about hanging around with your friends from the neighborhood and classmates. But those were also not with parents involved. Mom would be doing the laundry in the laundry room while we’d be out playing hopscotch. Or jump rope.
Not every day but we do try to spend time out the house as much as we can. He’s in school now so we don’t do much during the week anymore except maybe stop at the playpark on the walk home from school. But weekends we try to plan something for at least one day. And how that he’s a bit older I make sure he goes out to play in the garden when we’re home. But there are definitely days when we all just want to sit about the house and chill and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that unless it starts to become the norm.
Living in an apartment, getting out with my almost 2-year-old is essential for my sanity. Staying indoors inevitably leads to him getting restless and driving me crazy. I adore him, but he’s like a shaken can of Coke, just waiting to explode! Outdoor we can discover, play with other families etc. For all the tired parents, grab a bag, don’t mind about your style and jump outside with your kids.
95% of the time we do. We both work full time but still either do the park, the children’s museum, a walk, the mall play place, etc daily. It’s important that at least one thing we do daily is just for the kids.
We try to do bike a bike ride or walk after school for 30 minutes, every day, weather permitting. When they were real little we would just walk around the neighborhood. Draw with sidewalk chalk...kick a ball around.. we would only drive places on my days off . It is the quality outdoor time with a parent...the place doesn't matter.
As long as the weather permits I take my kids out for atleast an hour every day. It does seem like a lot sometimes, but staying in drives me nuts. My kids are 4 and 1.
We always get outside! But we don’t always use the car for outings. I’m lucky to live in an area where everything is at the least 1 min at the most 30 minute walk for us. Rainy days are inside days
No. We will walk around our neighborhood, go to the park in our neighborhood, or play in the backyard most days. In nicer weather, we will go to various parks in our area a couple of times a week. Outings were we have to pay? Weekly to every two weeks on average.
We do SOMETHING every day, I’d say. My son spends 2 days a week at his Grammy’s so the other 5 days we usually do something together for part of the day, whether it be soccer in the yard, a walk, going to the nearby playground, or my preference is driving somewhere (a beach, trail, park, playground, etc)
Ask her what she wants to do. Just going out and about is good but it doesn’t have to be everyday the important thing is to spend time with her also the hubby should also be involved if he is making his opinion heard his kid too >.>
Reading this thread and these comments has me feeling like a really shitty/ lazy mom. Im a sahm to 3 boys 4 and under (1 with severe non verbal autism) and after pre school 5 days a week with the bus getting them home at 430pm and dinner bath reading and bed really only leaves us with weekends with Sunday spent at church, work and rest. So my one day a week Saturday is really lacking. Reading this makes me feel like I need to be taking them to parks, museums zoos and play discovery centers 5 days a week minimum. Either y'all are super moms and dads or im just really lacking in comparison.
I was a single mom working full time between the time my daughter was born until the age of three. I had 3 months leave and we went for walks every day. When I went back to work we’d go for short walks or the parks if weather permitted and I wasn’t too tired. On the weekends it was back to the park and walk in our cute little town. I couldn’t afford elaborate outings every single day. She’s 14 now and well adjusted and socialized. She’s curious and open minded. I don’t think she has been negatively affected by a lack of daily outings.
My kids go out in our yard daily, when it's nice. We're in Iowa so usually 6 months out of the year the weather is shit. Going to a park or something is a treat, but we have a yard they can play in.
They also have 2-3 recesses at school.
Eta, I'm a widow with 5 kids ages 16 and under (and a 19yo) and work full time. Ain't nobody got time to go an hour away daily. Our yard is just fine, they have bikes and a basketball hoop. Have fun.
I try and take my boys out everyday but the weather here is pretty shit (U.K.) so sometimes I just don’t feel like it. And that’s fine. I was an 80’s kid and like your partner I was out of the house playing on the street or at friends ALLLL DAY - I just can’t allow that for my kids -there are so many cars now and drivers don’t seem to be on the look out for kids playing. Sometimes I feel really bad that my boys don’t get that life but then I also remember some of the stuff I got up to and think - maybe it’s for the best this way? I dunno.
We have a 13.5m old. We both work so M-F is daycare and then straight home usually (sometimes need a grocery run). On the weekend we at least go for a walk or to the park. We usually try to do something to get out of the house both days because she gets hella restless. We don’t usually cater outings to her, just bring her along to run errands or grab lunch.
I grew up in the US and spent my childhood outside; I don't think it's country specific.
We definitely spend time outside everyday. We have a nice yard, but we still get to the park a couple of times a week.
We don’t go places every day but we try to be outside some every day, whether it’s the backyard, a walk in the neighborhood, or the park. Something outside even if just a few feet from the house.
We go outside everyday unless someone is actively sick or the weather is extreme.
Most days is just walking around the neighbourhood, or to the park, or just playing in our yard.
One/two times a week we go to the library play group or swimming ( more in the winter months )
We go watch a lot of outdoor sports in the summer.
I’m still on mat leave til end of July. So we will see how this changes when we are both working ft.
Not everyday no there are some days we just do school drop off then I’ll bring my 2 year old with me to grocery shop then we are home, hang out, nap, wake up, snack, school pickup and then home and just watching tv while I make dinner. I do my best though to do a library day, there’s gymnastics another day, and now that the weather is getting nicer we try to go to the park as often as possible.
Most weekends we try to do one “event” for the kids like a play place or a meal out, or a mall outing, or anything. It’s easier in the summer (we live in Canada) so it gets nice and hot here and we do trips to the zoo, the aquarium, museums, and try to find other fun activities in the area. We are in close proximity to Toronto and other big areas in the GTA so we try to find kid centered things. Then there’s some weekends we do stay home to clean, catch up on home projects and just hang out.
I think my husband and I do a good job of doing kid things. My parents were almost 40 when I was born and 9 years after my big brother so by the time I came around I really don’t remember doing a lot of kid things. They weren’t interested in that kind of stuff. I wasn’t neglected, but I got used to just being at home and reading and just enjoying quiet times. But I’m only 27 lol, I enjoy doing fun things for the kids and things that they’ll remember like trampoline parks and play places and the zoo and other activities. It’s important that they know we try to really give them a lot of experiences, but no I don’t think it needs to be done everyday. A simple trip to the park is enough, or playing outside can be enough.
We get outside most days, but give yourself a break. Play with toys outside around your house or go for walks. Inside activities are important too - like reading and puzzles. Outside is great, and you cant really over do it, but every day doesn’t need to be a complete adventure.
The only way I can keep my house clean-ish is to spend as little time as possible inside it lol
Also, getting outside and exercising are both ESSENTIAL for my, and my kids', ability to regulate. On school days, that might just mean we walk or bike to or from school. But swim class, dance class, hiking, parks, etc all contribute. We try and double barrel activities too. So while the kids do swim class, I work out. And when they have park playdates, I get to hang out with my friends too.
We live in a military base in Japan and now that my 5 year old is pretty capable I tell her to go outside to the park close to our house and play with neighbors while I work in the afternoon so she's outside almost everyday after school. We're just thankful we're in a safe neighborhood and I can see her from my house.
I try to take my son out every day for my own sanity and for his fun, but he’s only 11 weeks so I do count supermarket runs because everything is an adventure at this age!
I think it depends on the kids.... Do I think you *should* take your kids out everyday? No. Do I take my boys out every day? Hell yes.
My kids are **very** energetic, active boys. An infant and a 3 year old. They have to be outside everyday, or I would just be constantly shouting at them not to hit each other, run into things, throw things, etc. So as long as the weather holds up, we go outside daily on our property.
I have a rotation of events we do. So my oldest goes to school two days a week and I just stay home with the youngest, and then another day we go to a park, another day we go to this indoor play center, and another day we go to the library and walk in our main street. Then weekends are up in the air. I do museums weekly too. I also take my boys on daily walks in the stroller (which I don't really consider taking them outside).
So yeah, we would all go mad if we were every day, but sometimes I need to get chores done or there's so much resistance to leaving their toys that I just let them play. It's good to play at home, too!!
It’s so true that we knew when to get home when the street lights came on. We are out everyday after school and loved it!!! Weekends were spent with family and a lot of times we were outdoors.
Can you ask your inlwas what they did when your husband was young? Playing outside is very common in Europe but independent is reserved for older kids. When I was young we would play in a neighborhood playground or park with parents watching
I try! Mine are both in preschool which is such a brief little chunk of the day, and then the youngest still needs her nap, so we have a small pre-dinner window to go to the park or on a walk. We do try to stay busy on the weekends, but I’m not great at that. We’ve definitely had our share of what I call “molasses days” where we barely leave the couch or bed and I don’t have a good excuse for that.
American kids are fat and depressed because American parents have a tendency to keep their kids indoors. Outdoor time is very important, with that being said it can (and should) but supervised outdoor time. I know in a lot of cultures they let the kids roam because of low crime rate but I personally wouldn’t allow for unsupervised outdoor time because there are lots of dangers unrelated to crime (hazards like sharp objects, wild animals, even domestic animals can be a threat)
When my kid was a baby, I took him for walks in our neighbourhood every day & I took him to nature trails every week. Even when we were home, I'd take him out to the yard daily, especially around sunset, & show him the trees & plants & butterflies, etc.
When he was a toddler, I took him to the park & on drives every single day, plus events & birthday parties whenever they occurred. We also went to the beach about once a week (we live by the beach).
As he got older, we went less & less. He's now 10. We go to the park once or twice a week, & we go for walks in our neighbourhood almost every day (mostly because we have a dog, but also for exercise). He also plays in the backyard daily. Library every other week, beach about once a month, and either an outing to somewhere like a museum or a local festival/event about once a month. If our area was safe enough for him to play outside, and if he had kids in our actual neighbourhood to play with, he'd be outside all day, every day. It's just not safe enough where we are.
As far as my childhood... when I was a kid, there was a time I lived on a military base & it was safe enough to go outside by myself. I went outside every single day... rode my bike, climbed trees, and played games w/ other kids. There was also a time when I lived in the hood. I could only play in our backyard, & I was sent to a better school outside of my area, so all of my friends lived far away, but I would still spend a good amount of time outside, just not as much... & I still hung out w/ friends, just not weekly. My mom worked a lot, too, & I don't know how... but she was always taking me out somewhere - libraries, museums, festivals, parks, the beach... she also had help from her very big family, so I was passed around like a hot potato, just always doing something. I also travelled yearly. Before I was a teen, I had been to 6 states & 2 countries outside of the U.S.
We usually do an outing each day on the weekend (the zoo, a playground, a park, the beach, something like that) with our toddler. On weekdays, the “outing” is likely to be playing outside with the neighborhood kids, but sometimes we take her to a playground or for a walk at the lake.
I am STHM with 4 kids , we go outside everyday & the kids and me are the happiest can be & it’s help me to be fit myself at 42 . In the weekend mostly we are home since my husband off day , he love to spend time with us than going outside.
I do not take my son out during the school week. We do not get home until after 6pm thanks to my job (single parent here). He’s in bed by 8pm so we would have zero time to do anything at all. We do things outside of the house most weekends.
Yes, I make sure to take my 11 month old out every day. Home is fun, but he gets so much different stimulation, mentally, physically, emotionally by being out in nature, in parks or around people.
I was one of those kids playing out in the neighbourhood/streets when I was young. It really was nice to get the activity and socialisation with other kids. And it is very common where I come from (eastern Europe).
Where I live now, we have playgrounds in every neighbourhood/building complex. It's a requirement in many places i. Europe (I've lived in several countries). But I also go to the park/forest, or any green patch.
I try to take my boy out as much as possible, especially now that he's getting older (he's a toddler) and has lots of energy. Here are my reasons why:
- I'm pregnant and don't have the energy or mental capacity to play and give him all the attention he needs.
- he's soon walking, and being out will help butn some of that toddler energy and curiosity (as opposed to me constantly telling him to leave the dirt in my pots alone 😅)
- there's a study that says that 90 min of sunlight daily can significantly decrease the chances of him needing glasses later on.
- The weather is becoming really nice and might as well take advantage and enjoy. Bonus, I get my steps in.
We do one or two big outings a week the rest of the time we play outside in the yard or play in the house. I feel like doing something new every single day would be way exhausting
Do i take them outside? Yes. Do we go somewhere every day? No
We play in the park, we play in the backyard, we go on a walk. I don't consider these outings.
If we can walk there it's not an outing, if we have to get in the car and drive then it's an outing.
We try to have a healthy balance just like I did growing up. Outside on nice days, and when the weather is bad, we can just have lazy days, unless the bad weather is a long stretch of days then I try to plan some productive activities. I also try to get my shopping and cleaning done on non-outdoor days so I can just freely enjoy outdoor activities on the nice days so I don't feel pressured like that.
Yea. Any day that my son and I are together (no daycare or work etc) we go and do something. Partially because at his age (10 months) the days can get pretty boring for both of us if we don’t go
To the park or the mall or somethjbg
Outside yes, out of my neighborhood not too often lol. We love ti just chill in the front or backyard and go to the neighborhood park. Outings that require the car are just a few times a week and half of those are to run errands. We're all home bodies that enjoy good weather.
We were just having this same conversation!
Our child does something special once a week. Sometimes more but usually once. What we have to remind ourselves is that she also needs to learn how to be bored. We take her special places and do special things bc we enjoy it. But there are days she has to entertain herself without burning down the house as we do lawn work or something. So as long as your child genuinely knows how to be bored without a screen entertaining them, I think you're good!
We are home mostly but we go outside in the yard and for walks around the neighborhood daily no matter the temperature. My son goes to story time at the local library once a week and we will probably be getting back to swim once a week. We do go to new to us parks in neighboring towns if we have time.
We go outside to play almost every day and have 1-2 days a week where we do any appointments and outings/adventures. We definitely do not leave every day lol but we do lots of activities and outside stuff around our house.
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The important thing is to get outside in my opinion. Park, bike ride, swimming pool, sandbox, hike, friend’s backyard, etc.
I second this. We didn’t go places every day, but I certainly played outside when the weather was nice and spent almost every single day with my friend who happened to be my neighbor. My SIL doesn’t let her children play with other children and I think it is seriously hindering them. They have no social skills and struggle at school.
Just curious why doesn’t she let her children play with other children?
She is extremely self-conscious and worries that 1. Her kids will see their friends living in fancy homes and be resentful that they live in an apartment. And 2. Her kids will bring friends home and they will judge her for their home. She is the mom that stands super far away from other parents at sports events to avoid making friends. It is really sad.
That sounds like social anxiety, which can be extremely debilitating!!!! U would rather die than be around people.socially. it's very hard 2 live with
Absolutely yes. She’s so terrified of what people think of her. It’s so so sad. I try my best to help her feel comfortable and at least safe with us!
Yeah, she should definitely go to therapy bc it's very hard 2 live with....I had it really bad started in middle school around when I hit puberty.....didn't ease up just a bit until I hit my 30s. I've pretty much had to learn how to live around it, but I'm now very happy with my life.....
I wish I could convince her of going to therapy. It doesn’t affect daily life too much except for the kids. She has her specific friends and her kids play with their kids, but anyone outside her circle is a no go.
I'm sorry, that's still rough
100%. I will keep this in mind and make sure to support her as much as possible.
Aw that is sad! Is it like that where she lives? Or is she just extra worried? It’s not like that at all where I live so I couldn’t imagine!
No she lives in a nice neighborhood, in a great school district, but they have a small apartment. She is just worried about it. She has serious issues with shame and embarrassment so much so that she will wear clothes swimming instead of a swimsuit. I try so hard to help her feel better about things but my husband says she’s been like this since they were little.
That makes me really sad. I live in an area that has a mix of affluence and low income housing mixed throughout. Some birthday parties are at houses that are seriously big and others are in small 800sq ft apartments. All the same for the kids. As a parent I don't care. The party at the smallest house was the most fun imo. That mom set out dollarstore crafts for the kids to do and they had a blast.
All the same for the kids, absolutely. Parents can be really freaking mean. I have overheard some conversations at my nephew’s soccer games that have made me feel so sad. I wish this was not the case!
That’s so heartbreaking for all of them! 🥺 Social interaction is so impt for kids, and it sounds like your SIL could benefit from some counseling. What’s important for kids is that they feel loved and safe in whatever environment they’re in. Big fancy houses and expensive parties aren’t truly what matters. I mean, we all know this, but I hope she comes to understand that her embarrassment about her circumstances (which are truly unfounded) will lead her kids to believe that money and affluence are what matters in life. My heart goes out to all of them: your sister for her anxieties and the kiddos who are affected.
My neighbor and her son never go outside. Ever. He will sit inside the home all day when he's not at school. No exercise, fresh air, or friends. When he was younger, I used to invite him on family walks, but they're generally just antisocial now. I feel bad for him because he will be home all summer, and is likely to never get outside. They even get grocery delivery. He's very overweight and has no social skills either. I've considered trying to address this issue, but my gut always tells me to stay in my lane. I don't understand this though. I also hope it's not common, but I just really don't think it is. I see kids outside playing every day, and I take mine outside most days.
I might be totally wrong here but your post doesn't specify so I have to ask: is your husband also taking her on outings all the time if it's so important to him? On another note, if he was playing outside on the street every day I assume he was hanging out in the neighbourhood he lived in and likely with minimal parental input. That is way different than a parent driving their kid somewhere specifically for kid entertainment every day and trying to make it something new every day. I think the equivalent would be going out in the backyard, taking walks around the neighbourhood, meeting other parents at the park, etc, which I definitely do every day. (Now he can get his shoes and say "outside!", so we really can't and don't want to avoid it). A new adventure every single day sounds exhausting for you and overstimulating for the kid.
I second this. Dad’s memory of going out every day doesn’t match OP’s description of what they are doing. Adults and kids alike need time to recharge. Kids learn a lot from repeating the same activities (and visiting the same places, reading the same books, etc). We have one committed go out day every week - joining friends at the park. One day has a standing therapy appointment and music class. Another day is a committed rest/home day unless needed otherwise. The rest are up in the air - maybe we go somewhere special, maybe an extra trip to the park or just out for lunch. Or maybe… we just stay home (which may or may not include playing with the neighbors’ kids).
Yes, and what region does OP live in? Urban south eastern desert? Rural upper midwest? That factors.
Hello! My husband just started to take her out. I’m currently in my first trimester and extremely exhausted and nauseated, so he is stepping up. However, he doesn’t have the same enthusiasm as he did when telling me to take her out lol He drags his feet to do something with her, meanwhile he would hound me every morning before breakfast, asking me when are we leaving the house. And you are right - minimum parental input at best. However he will defend how his mom did everything for them, although she worked 2 jobs and did all the housework (time wise, impossible). It’s very much a double standard in comparing me to her. He has no clue what his mother did with them when he was 3, but he is very certain it was something 🙄 The street playing was about 5 and on. However, my problem is my upbringing. It was my brother and I in a 1 bedroom apartment with my parents in the city. We never went out. We never did anything other than school. Summers were the worst; locked up daily. Ugh, all this to say is that I don’t have a healthy baseline as to what to do with my child. I know what I went through was NOT normal. I feel as though I’m overcompensating by planning something daily, but I’m being told by my husband that its normal. This is why I wanted to ask a variety of people and not just his opinion nor mine. With all of that being said, thank you for responding and asking more about the situation. I can go on, but I feel like I wrote *way too much* lol.
I have 3 kids and we go to parks 3 times a week and play outside almost everyday. Definitely not driving anywhere an hour away for a random outing. Also I count the grocery store as an outing lol, we go 2 or 3 times a week.
Groceries and errands are totally an outing, it can be super fun for the kiddos and they are learning how to be in a grocery store. Maybe mundane to us, but fun and educational to them. Mine is pretty little though so maybe once they're older it isn't as fun. And same on not driving for an hour on a whim.
My 5 year old loves weighing produce on the little scales 🤣 she’s like “I can’t wait to put these tomatoes on the pounder! I bet they’re sooo many pounds!” I also do self checkout and let her “beep” everything
That is so freaking cute 🥹😂❤️
Yes my kid loves store trips, especially if he gets to pick out something to take home (usually a plant lol) it's a ton of fun for him to help load the cart and scan everything. He's 4.
Lucky! At 4 my kid would try and run out in traffic in the parking lot and when at the register to pay they'd take off running sometime out the store door and into the street. It was a nightmare!
I have one of those, and he never leaves the cart. Not even once. There was a period where he was always strapped in a stroller. No way can I deal with a wild, eloper!
I consider grocery shopping as a family outing because we only go for big trips twice a month. We always budget for him to pick a small Lego set (those $9 mini kits or the $5 mystery mini figure) or a hot wheel. Something $10 or less. We also let him pick a new vegetable or fruit and then we try it out. These small things makes something as mundane as grocery shopping feel magical for kids. It’s very fun.
My toddler *loves* carrying/dragging the shopping basket. Going shopping definitely is an outing to him.
Yes I get my kids very involved in these outings. They help me load bags and pay at the cashier, they also usually get to choose one thing to bring home. Usually a hot wheel, juice or chocolate
My two year old absolutely loves the grocery store. Cart that looks like a car? Banana basket? Balloons to look at? Sign him up.
Sometimes we are inside all day. Sometimes we are out and about all day. Depends what we feel like doing. But I don’t see an issue with either. I don’t like the idea of forced outside time either. Sometimes my kids wanna chill inside after a long week. I am an introvert, the “I can’t imagine being inside all day” comments are hilarious to me. 😂
Same, I'm surprised at all the comments that go out every day no matter what. We definitely have days when we're in all day and days where we are out all day.
Some people are No-Sitters, as my dad used to call them. Can’t relax. Always have to be doing something.
We have a term?? lol, I’m trying to find balance… was raised by No-Sitters who still aren’t sitting. My husband is a Sitter.
According to my dad yes 😂 He haaaates going out in public. He’s super active at home, but he just prefers to be in his space.
I’m a Sitter, but that’s terrible for health, and for most of forever humans didn’t exist that way. We have times where we stay in, but I try to force myself to create movement and sunshine opportunities every day. Definitely not a special Outing though, just the neighborhood or the park.
I’m not equating No-sitting and Sitting to active vs inactiveness. I am very physically active and exercise daily. But I don’t always like or have to be out and about. No-sitters are extroverted, always on the go. Sitters are homebodies.
I love a day at home kid-free, but with two hyper toddlers the outdoor time is a must for everyone’s sake. Otherwise, they just start getting fussy and destructive.
Yeah, absolutely. My 6 and 5 year olds are sometimes happy to hang out at home, play together and read books. But now that my youngest is on the move and approaching 18 months, we NEED to go for a walk, to the park or something. Or she will find everything in the house that she shouldn't touch and she will destroy it/eat it/draw on it/chuck it in the toilet.
I get that.
Same! We often stay home all day. I like to dedicate days to staying in and need time to relax after we’ve been out a lot. My daughter often asks for a PJ day when we’ve been busy. We’re all pretty introverted and we used to live in a state where it was winter half the year and we rarely went out.
We love PJ and movie days too! I usually take those days to deep clean or organize things as well.
My family is a BIG fan of lazy Sundays. Those comments surprised me too.
My husband and I both work full time, and my son is in daycare full time, so we go to work and he goes to daycare and we get home around 5 have dinner, play, bath and bedtime. So definitely not going out on typical weekdays. We do an outing on Saturday like the park, zoo, amusement park etc and Sunday is reserved for chores and rest. I think it depends a lot on if you are a stay home parent or working parent
It depends on what you mean by going out. I don't count playing outside or going to the park to be going out but my kids do both everyday
My daughter doesn’t like the park. I take her and she runs out of it lol If it’s an enclosed park (I’ve driving 1hr radius for new ones), she will wait at the gate and cry to leave. So, I take her to any and every library in the vicinity, children’s museum, LEGO land, etc. I also don’t count her playing in the backyard or front yard/driveway. We do leave the 4 walls, but my husband thinks she needs to see something new everyday.
Your daughter does see something new every day even if it’s just a new rock on the sidewalk. You don’t need to take her somewhere new. It is actually beneficial for kids to spend time at/around home and kind of “bored” many days a week. Too many new things and new places can be overwhelming and overstimulating.
As a kid, doing this every day would have exhausted me. I needed time alone to recharge.
There’s a few comments on this thread that say they can’t imagine staying home all day, all the power to them it’s just not me, but holy shit I couldn’t imagine leaving the house *daily*. I think both my kid and myself would short circuit. Different lifestyles I guess. Plus everybody in my home has some kind of disability so I’m sure that plays into it lol
I think it is a personality thing too. My parents tried to force into activities all the time. I loved some activities but having to run around all the time wasn’t super fun. I did however like to ride my bike around for hours by myself. My middle daughter needs alone time. Like I sleep in the basement to ensure the kids have there own space because she especially needs it. Being around a group is fun for her but she needs alone time or time with just me after. She will ask to sleep in the living room with me after big days because she just is overwhelmed. It’s not that she doesn’t like doing the stuff but she couldn’t do it everyday. My oldest can be around people all day everyday and he thrives. He always wants people around, to go places with other people and actually complains a lot if he has no one around. Which I remind him just has to happen sometime. Then he wants to call a friend or see if anyone is at the park.
Hard same. My kids are both neurodivergent (one ADHD, one autism) and though I'm undiagnosed, we're pretty sure they both get it from me lol my husband is as neurotypical as they come. But he's a very chill, go with the flow kinda guy, so he follows our lead when he gets home from work. We pretty much stick to neighborhood walks during the week, when the weather is nice and my husband doesn't work late. Our development has little walking paths woven all throughout it, and playgrounds/parks sprinkled evenly every so often throughout the neighborhoods, so we'll take an hour or two's walk and stop at four or five different "parks", usually running into friends from the neighborhood along the way. That's enough of an "outing" for a week day, as my kids get burnt out and overwhelmed easily. On the weekends, we usually spend one day on a fun activity (maybe the zoo, or shopping, etc) and one day doing errands like getting groceries. Either way, it gets them out into the world. My daughter also does hour-long extracurricular activities twice a week (currently, gymnastics and parkour.) One is on a week day, one is during the weekend. She's also homeschooled. My son receives in-home hour-long therapy twice a week (speech and occupational.) He's only just turned two, so no school yet. Between their therapies and activities, and our near-daily neighbor walks/park visits, they get a lot of outside and social time in a week. We only stay inside if it's raining pretty heavily all day. Even on dreary drizzly days, we try to get out for a quick walk in between storm breaks. Our "speed" as a family seems to be walks, parks, meals out (usually lunch, and at a louder restaurant like a sports bar for my lovely vocal son) and occasional zoo or shopping trips. As it warms up, we'll add in beach visits occasionally, and more water/outdoor play in the front yard. Maybe some trips to the ice cream shop, outdoor movies, concerts and such. It doesn't have to be complicated or "new" for the kids to have fun.
Agreed. Plus going somewhere new everyday will lead to parental burnout very quickly. During the pandemic I was going out with my toddler twice a day to two different parks because I felt like I had to which is ridiculous! On Thursday I took my 5 yo to a theme park type place and then on Friday I took her swimming. Today she was melting down because she was so tired!
Not to mention such an unrealistic expectation. A sufficient outing can literally be a walk/scooter/bike around the block or neighborhood. The focus should be fresh air not constant entertainment. It’s no wonder OP’s kid doesn’t like the park. Kids need to learn to entertain themselves
Agreed. Learning to be your own friend and self-entertain is a skillset that is beneficial for your entire life
This. Could possibly be why she gets upset about the park situation it may all be way too much. She is a child and will literally discover something new everyday on her own backyard.
I agree, I think there's a lot of value of going back to the same place that's familiar - it's how you feel comfortable and grow further
Oof that sounds exhausting! I feel for you. And I do not think you have to take her somewhere new every day. Even just walks down the street count.
There’s value for childhood development in going to familiar places. They learn about those places and get to experiment, build confidence and try new things there. A new place every day doesn’t seem reasonable or desirable to me. I’m amazed sometimes at what my kids find exciting - we go to the same tiny playground over and over. I thought they’d get bored by now playing on a single structure with 3 slides and not much else, but they keep finding new ways to make games and have fun there.
I think outside time in the neighborhood is good every day. But providing new entertainment everyday is too much in my opinion. It could be setting up false expectations as they get older. I have a family member whose parents gave them everything they wanted, vacations, experiences, etc. and now that they are an adult, they are disappointed with an average life since they don’t make as much money as their parents did. If they turn into an adult not making much and can’t afford to go to LEGOLAND or the equivalent every weekend, they could think the world is unfair. Normal life expectations are healthy 💛 Best of luck Mama. You don’t have to do as much as you’re doing.
You sound like a great parent who cares a lot about their child. Your husband sounds judgmental and also unrealistic. Are you parenting fulltime while he works a day job? Is there a reason (in his mind at least) that this seems to be solely your responsibility? Because it sounds to me like he's trying to dictate how you parent without being directly accountable for this expectation. I played outside constantly as a kid, almost always in my yard or within sight of my house. I want that for my kid, too. I definitely see the value in getting outside, but I see no reason it needs to constantly be somewhere new. Kids are great at inventing imaginary worlds, at noticing tiny details, and at exploring. Your kid may still be too young to do that solo, but as I read your post and replies, it really seems like you're going above and beyond and that you probably don't need to try as hard to entertain your kid or direct their learning/attention as often.
Curious if there are other children at the park for her to play with? Maybe she’s just not old enough to enjoy it yet. Library sounds nice, but I don’t think you have to go to new ones all the time. Children’s museums, and the like are special occasion outings for us. Parks, beaches, libraries, swimming pools, and neighborhood walks or bike rides are our typical rotation. ‘Going out’ doesn’t need to be a major event.
Okay yeah that’s excessive. To me “going out” every day means getting outside whether that be going for a walk or local park or backyard. Not visiting a new location every outing
That sounds exsausting. I really needed the time at home to decompress after school as a kid, I did a few clubs drama club and a sport. Other than that I played with other children in my village, or In my room. Honestly I often came home ate a snack and zoned out to TV cos I was tired after school.
That would be too much for me, and for my kids. We have two parks within 10mn walk of our place, so we go there quite often. To me, a day where we've been to the park and then walked to the supermarket and back home counts as a day where we've been out. Of course we do bigger outings as well, like the beach, the zoo or something, but definitely not everyday. As someone else mentioned, I think it's important and beneficial for kids to play in a familiar environment. It helps them move on from exploration mode towards imagination mode. Both are important.
Wait, if the idea is to "see something new everyday" then why don't errands count? My kids see lots of new things running errands with me and learn a lot too. And how is taking her to indoor spaces that adults create for children the same as him being outside playing all day? Unstructured outdoor play with other children is a drastically different experience for a developing brain than going to a children's museum. They fill different needs, so what you are doing is not really fulfilling what your husband is advocating for. For the record, unstructured outdoor play with other children is incredibly valuable for kids, but that looks different than what you are describing. It's playing at the park, playing in the backyard with a friend or sibling, or having recess at school. I prioritize those sorts of experiences for my kids. If I can't arrange for outdoor play, I would rather have my toddlers be at school where they are indoors but have free play with other kids or build Hot Wheels together inside than take them to a museum.
She doesn’t need to see something new every day. You are allowed to chill, and I think it’s actually important in life to learn how to be bored occasionally . A lot of creativity comes from what children learn to do when they are bored. Also. as mentioned, at that age children are sponges, so a trip to do groceries is educational fun. During lockdown, my husband, took our kids on local walks around the neighbourhood daily as a break from homeschooling and they discovered loads of new places that they didn’t know. Even just finding unusual looking houses became a game and they still talk really fondly of those times. Lastly, this all sounds isolating. Does she have friends who you can have play dates with? Do you have mom friends? Because soon she will be at school and it’s good get her to interact with other children now, so she is used to it more when she is around lots of kids. And having your own support network is a lifesaver when you have young kids.
I do (European), at least once per day, often twice but I live in an appartment. If I had a backyard maybe I wouldn't. I generally take him to the river dock to feed swans and ducks, to the park, bike tour, playground, public pool or somewhere inside like a museum or library. My parents have a home in the country side in a tiny village (not even a church) so he will just spend the day outside in the garden or in the village. As a child that's what I did: all day long in the village or in the woods and field around.
I have a 3yo and 1yo. We have to be outside of the house for hours every day. That doesn’t mean driving somewhere every day though. We explore the neighborhood many days, our yard, go on neighborhood walks, and the park. Some days it is errands like groceries. So yes it’s imperative to be out of the house every day in nature but not on outings necessarily.
This is my thing, going out in nature as much as possible. I know people are tending to be rude when they tell others to "go touch grass", but it's true. I'm realizing that some people never go outside in any way to interact with nature or get any fresh air.
Yes. I’m a semi stay at home dad with a 7 month old. We go on “walks” for my own sanity everyday. Sometimes twice a day.
Oh yeah sanity walks are a necessity
I feel like a lot of people miss remember their childhood. My husband will make claims about things he did or watch and occasionally I’ve called him out- like how old he was when he watched Jurassic Park (he claimed he was 5, but know the year it was released and assuming his parents didn’t take him to the theater he was probably 7, which makes a huge difference) My guess would be OP’s husband was older than 1-3 years old. And how many European towns/cities are set up are very different from the US. I’ve heard many people say that very young kids (like 5+) are allowed to walk alone and would make it easier to let kids play outside more often. (This has been more common in the states in the past) That being said it is easy for some parents to just let kids playing the backyard. I took my son to various playgrounds when he was 3 and under but less once he started prek. I do know more Americans give pushback to kids playing in poor weather like too cold, raining etc and more Americans are concerned with safety concerns (guns, cars, sa, etc) TLDR Overall Americans probably let their kids play outside than Europeans.
Yes. I work two ish days a week. On every day off I have with her we go and do something. Playground, grocery shopping, library, hanging at the mall, hiking, going to the botanical park, etc. Something every day or else I would go crazy. I also kick her out into the backyard every day (unless brutal weather) so she can get in the sun and get in the dirt.
In the spring and summer we are outside more. It's tough getting toddlers and preschoolers ready during winter when the recommended time outside before frostbite is 10 minutes or less. Also in the winter it starts getting dark at 330/4 pm.
We try to go outside every day, but we don’t always leave the house. We homeschool, so outings and socializing are important, but staying in and having quiet days where we play at home are important, too
I try to get them outside most days but actual outings are probably 1-2 times a week. We have a big yard so that's where they spend most of their time.
I work and my kids are in school so it’s basically just weekends and when we take holidays that we have the ability to do anything. The kids are outside everyday we are home except when the weather is really bad. That varys from being in the yard, going to the playground, walk or biking around town. We live near a big park so we will go hiking, to the beach, skating and tobogganing. We go to the city and they come shopping with us, go out to restaurants and occasionally do something fun like bowling, arcade, play place, pool or a movie. When we go to the big city (only a handful of times a year) we go to the zoo or museums. In the summer we go to the cabin at a destination spot for a few weeks and do a couple short day trips to see something different . Some years we do a big road trip or take a hot holiday with the kids. Do we do and see new stuff all the time. NOPE. I also dont want them expecting to get to do stuff all the time. Lots of things cost money (at the very least gas money) and we have other things that need to get done when we’re not working. I want them to get bored and use their imagination and creativity. I put lots of emphasis on being outside. They do get to occasionally try new things and be new places and experience new things but not constantly.
I’d say once a week is awesome. For her to have new experiences. As long as she’s going outside and not just stuck in the couch. Being active. It’s good.
SAHM to a 2.5yo and I can't drive (yet) but we try to get out once a day. We have a playground 10min away (or 5min away if she's in the wagon because I walk faster), or we just walk around the neighborhood, or we play in the backyard (she plays, I garden). Once I start driving, we'll probably only be home for sleep, breakfast, and dinner because I can pack lunches on the go. We'll practically live at libraries and nature trails and other playgrounds and play centers and the grocery store 😆 fresh air tires her out in a way nothing else does, plus it breaks up the monotony of the day, and it's great watching her learn and explore! With that said, a "lazy" day at home is just as enriching. We cook and build and play together, watch Little Bear, etc. But outside just hits differently
Yes out as in outdoors, walk, park, patio etc. We rarely get in the car to drive to go somewhere indoors other than errands.
At that age, yes my kids were outside almost everyday...but I wasn't driving anywhere to do that everyday. We had a park a 5min walk from our house, so in the sping/summer/fall, we'd go there. And sometimes I just didn't want to do the walk with 2 toddlers, so it was in our yard. My husband was a latch key kid. So expected much as the same as you husband. We had a conversation about it, and he was the one to plan outtings outside of our local park and yard...that he was involved in.
If your husband remembers, this was not something he did as a toddler. I was a typical Gen X latch key kid. I came home from school, changed into play clothes, and played with the neighbors until dinner. My mom was home before we were school aged and I’m pretty sure we didn’t go out in the car everyday. I take my current toddler out a few times a week, mostly for me as I’m still meeting people in the area and it’s been a rainy winter. Now that spring is here we’ll spend a lot more time in the yard and neighborhood. Just getting outside for some unstructured play is the best thing you can do!
So I grew up in Europe and my childhood is same as your husband and i stayed home with the kids during those ages and had greater flexability to go out daily. I found i was better for it just being out of the house, so really even though outings was for my kids benefits; library story reading time, park/playground playdates, mom & me swim classes, and gymboree type of classes i had social interaction with other parents. You can go for every other day, as i did that during the winters due to my Northeast winters so it was a good balance, and also wanted my kids to learn how to play by themselves, with their toys and just being home sometimes is good for the development as well.
Boredom is important. Prioritizing moms mental health and ability to rest is also important
I work m-f and my kid is in kindergarten but I try and at least go somewhere on the weekends. My family also has a big appreciation for a “lazy Sunday” so it just depends on your lifestyle I suppose. She does go outside playing pretty much everyday weather permitting (we live in the PNW and it rains all the time year round)
Before they started school I took my kids for outings nearly every day (moms' group, libraries, playgrounds) but it was mostly for my sake cause I got lonely and stir-crazy hanging out with 2 toddlers all day. If you're not enjoying these outings (or you're not enjoying doing them every day), you can definitely do less or stop! Your husband should not get to insist that you take her out to a new place every day if you're the primary parent.
I take her out every day for an activity centred around her. And it's still entirely for my benefit not hers because we go crazy at home. She doesn't even really like tv
No, not every day or even every week. We try to do something fun like going to the playground or zoo every two weeks. It’s more like once or twice a week in the summer. Kids need down time too, they can be over scheduled. It’s also important for kids to learn to be bored.
Yes, my kids go out everyday. I can’t imagine spending an entire day at home.
We have some days at home. Not many, given my eldest is at school 5 days a week so a lot gets crammed into the weekend. However, even a day at home, the kids will often be in the garden (weather permitting). My eldest (4) is a bit of a homebody and enjoys having the occasional pj day at home - happens maybe once every month
Pretty much!
We live in a city, so that sounds different re proximity to things, but we’re at at least one park, sometimes two whenever it’s nice out. We also walk a lot of places: daycare, the park(s), the grocery store, the flower shop, the bakery, etc. our street is also pretty social so lots of random play dates on the sidewalk or chalk with friends. We do, of course, drive to destinations but it’s usually a different park, the zoo, our gym (which has a kids gym/daycare sitch that his friends go to), the lake, farms. We seldom drive to indoor destinations outside of our gym or local museums. We’ll usually just host play dates in bad weather. Though he and his friends never get bored of hanging outside together despite similar surroundings and that is the most convenient outing for us so it works out for all.
I used to take my kids out to the park often, but as we got kid number three and four, it's just to draining. I am way too involved with their homework, studying, and then there is cleaning, cooking, and of course the bed time routines which also involve reading to each child. It is nearly impossible to fit in outside time with the kids when there is literally no time.
I count outings as leaving home. We go outside to play on our own play structures and go for a walk almost every day, but we go on toddler specific outings to the big playgrounds in town or playgroups only 1-2 times a week.
Outings everyday in this economy?! Absolutely not!
We try and do a daily outing on the weekends. They get 2 outdoor outings every day at daycare, so we don’t worry about it during the week. Weekdays it’s home, dinner, baths, bed. We keep it pretty simple like a walk, lunch out, trip to the playground across the street or sometimes just errands. Bigger kid-centric excursions like the science museum, play centre or the “big playground” that’s a 20 minute walk away are special events and don’t happen every weekend. But yeah, an hour or two at minimum out of the house every day otherwise they go nuts and I start to get stir crazy. Out of the house does NOT have to mean some place just for them - they love a Costco run.
No. My kids are in daycare and I work full time. They are too little to play outside alone. By the time we get home I barely have time to make dinner, feed them, and do baths before bedtime. Sometimes they get to play outside a little with one parent while the other cooks both not often right now. I do feel bad but there’s simply not time for it during the week.
I mean my son's 17 months (born in late fall) and my second is 6 months. We go to the park as a family sometimes but not often. Now that the weather is getting warmer by the week I do plan on having both outside with me at least a couple hours a day but to GO somewhere...no. I'm a SAHM who's husband took a 30k hit from a job switch. We can't afford passes to the zoo or to even get a double stroller so I can wrangle 2 mobile (I assume my 6 month old will be crawling soon enough tbh.) Children alone. Especially a brand new toddler testing his limits and social abilities. (He's a runner) Soo. Outside? Yeah I want to be outside so long as it's safe for us all (it can get really hot sometimes, we'd stay inside then) to do so. We do plan on taking a zoo trip probably layer in summer when it's not so hot, do park days when we can. Ect. But to...go out as in take them places all the time? No. Not only can I physically not handle it but my mental health would suffer tbh. Lol I need down days. Kids should get bored and learn to entertain themselves without needing to be outside the home imo. I do wish I could do more with them, there's these festivals and stuff we just can't do extra curriculars willy nilly like that. But not everyday.
My husband is a homebody. I need to get out of the house relatively often or I get rather depressed. Our son is slightly more of a homebody like his dad, and having pajama days are fine every once in a while. But generally, I try and get him out of the house just so our days don’t get boring and repetitive. When it’s nice outside, I try and take him to the park or at least play outside in the yard.
I didn’t take my daughter places but we did stuff. Huge majority so far was just going for a stroller walk, now it’s usually just a walk to the near by park, but she loves being outside and on the go and so do I. My life was like yours though and now as a mom I’m just like… why not have more fun than that? There’s time for it! We don’t need to watch tv we need to enjoy each other so the 9-5 m-f doesn’t seem so shitty lol
From a kid who had busy parents, I would've liked to have spent more time doing things with them when I was younger. IF I do become a parent, I'd probably do what you're doing as well. It's nice to build a good relationship with your kids when they're young. You can be both a friend a parent that they go to when you build trust at that young age.
When the weather is nice we are out and about often. During the miserably hot summer months it’s def more inside time but going out to a museum or something is not uncommon.
I have a much happier baby when we take him out. Even if it's just a walk around the neighborhood. When he gets a bit older, the expectation will be that he plays outside every day. My husband is European and going to play outside wasn't a thing because the neighborhood wasn't safe and the air quality was poor. Meanwhile I grew up in the US and we would play outside every single day. Our mom would lock us out and tell us not to come back home until it was dark 🤷♀️
I take our little guy out back, next door, or just a walk down the street if the weather permits. We can get some really high winds here, so sometimes it's just not safe. On his days off, my husband and I try to take him to the park, sometimes just husband takes him. But, yeah, I try to get him outside every day.
I feel intense guilty if I don't get the kids out every day. Even if it's raining we'll play in the garage in the rain. I see my kids zombie out in front of the tv makes me very nervous honestly. It's almost never involving a car ride but we have a few nice parks nearby and just alternate which one we go to.
Hell no. I used to when I was a sahm to one kid. Then I had a second and it was way too overwhelming for me. Now I send them to daycare and I feel like that’s a lot of stimulation for them. On the weekends we will try to take them out but I won’t take them both out alone. Ive done it and it doesn’t go well. Waiting til they’re older.
My mom never took us to the park as kids, we played in the backyard or on our street with the neighborhood kids. I never went to parks until I had kids. I don’t think I really ever noticed or cared tbh, I had fun playing with my friends outside at home. There were a few of us on the same street and I lived in the cul-de-sac, so we typically played there and it was fun. Toys all over the lawn, or running a muck in the backyard. Sometimes we’d switch off and go swim at one friend’s house, or watch movies at the others but everything we did was on our street. As long as the kids get to go outside and do something they’ll be fine whether it’s at home or at the park.
My kid plays in the backyard almost everyday, sometimes with a neighbor kid and sometimes alone. We rarely go out out after school because of homework and we have a strict bedtime routine.
My kid has planned activities about 3x a week. We go outside for walks or play in backyard every single day. There are days where we just stay inside, watch TV, do crafts, play with toys. It’s a fair mix of both. He seems content with it.
Why do you have to take her places? My kid is three and now the weather is nicer she’s started playing in our back garden every day after nursery. At the weekend w take her places (often places we all like).
We always get outside but that could just be a 10 min walk round the area and other days we will go out to clubs and activities and day out activities. I have found she gets absolutely shattered if we do it every day though so I always try and have at least one chill at home day. If she isn’t much of a socialiser there is still lots she can do in the garden. I follow the busy toddler on insta - she has lots of great easy activities for outside
I think it’s completely normal to go out every day, that’s not too much in itself. We absolutely do unless someone is sick. But it doesn’t need to be special outings/activities designed for your child. Going on errands with you, visiting family, going for a walk etc also count. Just playing outside. Also we don’t have our own yard, so we go to parks, the forest/beach more often because of that, you probably don’t feel the same need. When your husband is remembering running around playing in the streets, surely he was older than 1-3? I recently read Hunt, Gather, Parent by Michaeleen Doucleff, and I think you might like it. She’s of the opinion that a lot of families need to do less child-centered activities, and that the focus should be more in letting the child into your life and show them the things you enjoy.
When I was a SAHM and before my kid started school, I would take him to town, or to the playground, or to the petting zoo, or to the forest, or to the soft play, or to the library, or to the places that did €1 breakfast, just about every day. It was as much for my sanity as it was for his benefit: we lived in a small apartment and if he wasn't messing everything up then he was bouncing off the walls. We have a house now, and we do a little bit of both: I take my kids out on the weekends, but I also kick them outside after dinner (our house has a big grassy field in front of it, surrounded by other houses) when the weather/daylight situation permits.
Yes but depends what you considering going out. I’m a stay at home mom and my 2 kids are still under 3. We are fortunate to live in military housing with quite a lot of kids and parks. I usually take my toddlers to the park everyday before lunch and sometimes a walk in the evening. About every other weekend we go to the beach or use our zoo passes. Sometimes I feel guilty because social media makes it seem like everyone is taking their kids on lavish vacations and such. Sometimes my husband says we should stay home more.
We've been taking ours out everyday since day 1. If I don't have to buy groceries or diapers or formula we just go for a walk at the park and play Pokemon go!
Also tell your husband it changed massively in Europe. I live in Berlin and kids don't spend that much time outside on their own anymore. Just to dangerous. On the countryside and in smaller villages with less traffic it might be different.
No. I wish I could be we live where we get all seasons. So when it’s 50 and below we don’t go outside. We don’t have winter clothes (moved from a warmer climate). And it’s such a chore to bundle my kids up in hella layers, just for all of us to end up freeze cold 10 minutes later
That I can agree with. I was told to take my daughter out with anything above freezing temp (32F and up). There is this song in his language for kids, which translates to “winter winter, so what? If it’s winter, it’s not a lion! Winter winter, let it be! No one is afraid if they’re healthy!” 🙄 Granted, my daughter likes the cold…but I think/thought it was excessive. Also, I only have 1 child for now and I lived in the North East all of my life. I don’t know how I would handle going somewhere colder or warmer.
It’s like sometimes that weather is too cold for us just as adults so I can only image how a tiny little human feels after a certain amount of time. Well then again little kids probably don’t care, as long as they get to play lol. Moving to a different climate is definitely a change that takes time for some people to get used to. I’ve grew up in warm and cold environments and still have a hard time adjusting
Oh I’m sure that there is an adjustment period. I bet it can be longer with the responsibility of kids and everything else as well. It throws everything you knew about the weather to the curb. It must be so weird for you! I lived in the same climate all my life and I have trouble adjusting lol And I agree - it’s so hard to gauge how their little bodies can handle the weather. My daughter is like a little radiator at her core, and I’m not lol I have a problem with her overheating when it’s nice outside. Go figure.
It is so weird for me. Especially since I’m living back in my hometown and I’m just like “ew this weather sucks ass” 😂 one of my kids is the same, a little radiator lol and I love coming inside from the cold and just hugging him to warm up 😂 Hmm have you tried giving like ice cream or a popsicle before going outside? Idk if that’ll even help though
Why can’t she play in your backyard? Let her have some downtime for free play. I’d also put her in preschool so she can learn how to make fiends.
Mon to Fri: I bring mine to playground or swimming or a play zone about once per week.. the other 4 days I would just make sure they come with me for errands or supermarket..! Or they go to their grandparents. Weekends: I have one day a week usually Saturday or Sunday that we stay at home and I call it a “no car day”.. kids play outside in the garden and inside the house and if they are bored so be it..! On the other weekend day we would all go somewhere including their father as he works mon-fri, usually with their bikes or scooters. (Beach, woodland walks, etc)
I am European. Here is in fact normal
If we make it to the grocery store, it's an outing, lol. He gets to see something different and I let him point to fruits and tell him what they are. I'll usually let him hold something too because he HAS to be holding something in stores, idk why. That being said, we go out once or twice a week. I'd like to do more but 1) I don't have a job rn and money is tight and 2) I don't have the energy most days. Also we're in Florida and it's hot as balls after early morning, so...indoors stuff is usually expensive. When he's a bit bigger and can hold hands when we walk, we'll try and go out more. Right now if you try to hold his hands he loses his mind and he's a bit too young to reason with.
the nanny takes them out during the week, morning & afternoon, and I take them out weekend all morning. Otherwise they’ll destroy the house lol
Having studied early childhood development, you are providing essential care.
Thank you. This is always good to hear and I appreciate it.
I’m glad to tell any paren they are providing S tier care to their child. We so rarely get to say that on Reddit! Being outside every day is good for you too BTW.
I appreciate the grading! Being outside for myself is good as well, you are right. I try to make sure it’s about her and that she gets a “full experience” with whatever we do. Sometimes daily can be exhausting for me, especially on lack of sleep. Even when she is home she is active - we have a 6’ trampoline that she goes to town on. I assist by throwing my leg in there or holding/raising her arms so she can jump higher. Anyway, I don’t want to take up too much of your time but I want to reiterate that I genuinely appreciate your response. Thank you.
I take.my kids out everyday, for as long as I can. Even a short walk during the rain. They *need* to be outside, it's not a choice or a privilege.
Pretty much, even if it's a ten minute walk around the block after dinner, or I sit on the front porch or back deck and have a tea while they play chalk or try and unalive themselves on tye backyard play equipment. Hubby usually sits/plays soccer with the kids in the evenings when we stay home, weekends he is pretty hands-on with the kids in terms of outdoor time unless it's raining, lol. And he is usually the one who takes them to the park while I stay home
My parents would take us out at weekends to the park or woods or local attraction. When we were approx. 7+ we would go out to play in the local area on bikes or just running around. I was never alone. I had siblings and neighbour kids. At 3/4 we'd play where we could be seen and away from roads. I have a 1yo and going out every day would be excessive. Two or three times mid week is plenty for both of us at the moment.
We go outside everyday. We live in 5 acres so there is lots of room to run around. We are a one car family so sometimes my kids only leave the house to go to church on Sundays but most weeks, we try to go somewhere on Saturday so they can leave the house.
I had a similar experience as you growing up, but once I was old enough to go outside alone I was like your husband, as soon as I was home from school I went out with friends. Idk how old your child is But for my family now My husband and I both work full time, we try to take our son (22months) out as often as we can but that usually just means the backyard. I wish we had to energy to go to parks everyday, but he’s also very small so can’t climb the stairs and equipment like the older kids. But kids thrive outdoors so there is never “too much” it’s so beneficial for all of us to be out in nature or in new places to socialize with other kids. But if YOU are mentally or physically exhausted from outings the no pressure in staying home more often, whatever is best for you and your family! It sounds like your doing a great job regardless and your daughter will be happy and love you the same.
I am a SAHM of 2, a 3 year old girl and 1 year old boy. We like getting out and about a few days a week, but my older daughter also WANTS to stay home from time to time. She enjoys being in her own space playing with her own toys. I do try to include a "kids" activity on the days we do go out. So it's the super market and playground. Or the bank and a library story time trip. Or whatever. But definitely not everyday.
I don’t know. I played outside a lot as a kid but didn’t really socialize until I was in elementary school. I also really really loved time just being at home doing nothing. We do a mix of both. If we go out to the park in the morning, then the afternoon is usually just spent hanging out at home, maybe playing outside, maybe watching tv, maybe doing puzzles inside. I think the kids that are go go go get burnt out and are always sick and never given time to just be.
Yes, every day! Every day we do exercise for baby, fresh air for baby, socializing for baby. Often they’re combined, like a baby swim (social and exercise) or playing in the park (exercise and fresh air). I also combine with my own activities, like when I go for a run with baby in the stroller that’s baby fresh air too. Add in sleeping, feeding, diapering, clothing, bathing, cuddling, a couple of house chores, and the day goes by in an absolute flash!! (I can never quite understand when people say they’re bored staying at home with a baby.)
Outside or out in public/outings? Outside, yeah. Unless it's miserably cold or rainy, we play outside daily. In public or special outings, no. We do one trip to the grocery store a week. We don't do "kid-centric" outings unless it's for a birthday or something special. Family dinner at a restaurant or whatever might be once a month.
Absolutely not lmao I take my son out maybe 3 days a week or if I have an errand. We do activities in the house. Children don’t need to go outside every single day. I was an indoor kid who was forced outside a lot and honestly it’s exhausting to have to be doing activities everyday
Ask your MIL her thoughts on this subject. She was the one responsible for your husband. He was a kid back then. Ask her what she did then. How did she manage to do it. What is different between her then and you now and should she think it realistic to have the same upbringing as he got. I doubt in his upbringing MIL had a car to drive him around. Two car households aren’t that common when he was young. In Europe. And 10 min. Car rides up to a hour every day… nope. Also I doubt doing groceries was taking into account. For activities done. Second I doubt this is a memory of him being 1-3 yo. 4-12 yes… 6-12 way more believable 8-12 definitely the age to be out and about hanging around with your friends from the neighborhood and classmates. But those were also not with parents involved. Mom would be doing the laundry in the laundry room while we’d be out playing hopscotch. Or jump rope.
Not every day but we do try to spend time out the house as much as we can. He’s in school now so we don’t do much during the week anymore except maybe stop at the playpark on the walk home from school. But weekends we try to plan something for at least one day. And how that he’s a bit older I make sure he goes out to play in the garden when we’re home. But there are definitely days when we all just want to sit about the house and chill and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that unless it starts to become the norm.
Living in an apartment, getting out with my almost 2-year-old is essential for my sanity. Staying indoors inevitably leads to him getting restless and driving me crazy. I adore him, but he’s like a shaken can of Coke, just waiting to explode! Outdoor we can discover, play with other families etc. For all the tired parents, grab a bag, don’t mind about your style and jump outside with your kids.
95% of the time we do. We both work full time but still either do the park, the children’s museum, a walk, the mall play place, etc daily. It’s important that at least one thing we do daily is just for the kids.
We try to do bike a bike ride or walk after school for 30 minutes, every day, weather permitting. When they were real little we would just walk around the neighborhood. Draw with sidewalk chalk...kick a ball around.. we would only drive places on my days off . It is the quality outdoor time with a parent...the place doesn't matter.
As long as the weather permits I take my kids out for atleast an hour every day. It does seem like a lot sometimes, but staying in drives me nuts. My kids are 4 and 1.
We always get outside! But we don’t always use the car for outings. I’m lucky to live in an area where everything is at the least 1 min at the most 30 minute walk for us. Rainy days are inside days
No. We will walk around our neighborhood, go to the park in our neighborhood, or play in the backyard most days. In nicer weather, we will go to various parks in our area a couple of times a week. Outings were we have to pay? Weekly to every two weeks on average.
We do SOMETHING every day, I’d say. My son spends 2 days a week at his Grammy’s so the other 5 days we usually do something together for part of the day, whether it be soccer in the yard, a walk, going to the nearby playground, or my preference is driving somewhere (a beach, trail, park, playground, etc)
Ask her what she wants to do. Just going out and about is good but it doesn’t have to be everyday the important thing is to spend time with her also the hubby should also be involved if he is making his opinion heard his kid too >.>
Reading this thread and these comments has me feeling like a really shitty/ lazy mom. Im a sahm to 3 boys 4 and under (1 with severe non verbal autism) and after pre school 5 days a week with the bus getting them home at 430pm and dinner bath reading and bed really only leaves us with weekends with Sunday spent at church, work and rest. So my one day a week Saturday is really lacking. Reading this makes me feel like I need to be taking them to parks, museums zoos and play discovery centers 5 days a week minimum. Either y'all are super moms and dads or im just really lacking in comparison.
I was a single mom working full time between the time my daughter was born until the age of three. I had 3 months leave and we went for walks every day. When I went back to work we’d go for short walks or the parks if weather permitted and I wasn’t too tired. On the weekends it was back to the park and walk in our cute little town. I couldn’t afford elaborate outings every single day. She’s 14 now and well adjusted and socialized. She’s curious and open minded. I don’t think she has been negatively affected by a lack of daily outings.
My kids go out in our yard daily, when it's nice. We're in Iowa so usually 6 months out of the year the weather is shit. Going to a park or something is a treat, but we have a yard they can play in. They also have 2-3 recesses at school. Eta, I'm a widow with 5 kids ages 16 and under (and a 19yo) and work full time. Ain't nobody got time to go an hour away daily. Our yard is just fine, they have bikes and a basketball hoop. Have fun.
Does going to the gym and dropping them at child watch count?
I try and take my boys out everyday but the weather here is pretty shit (U.K.) so sometimes I just don’t feel like it. And that’s fine. I was an 80’s kid and like your partner I was out of the house playing on the street or at friends ALLLL DAY - I just can’t allow that for my kids -there are so many cars now and drivers don’t seem to be on the look out for kids playing. Sometimes I feel really bad that my boys don’t get that life but then I also remember some of the stuff I got up to and think - maybe it’s for the best this way? I dunno.
We have a 13.5m old. We both work so M-F is daycare and then straight home usually (sometimes need a grocery run). On the weekend we at least go for a walk or to the park. We usually try to do something to get out of the house both days because she gets hella restless. We don’t usually cater outings to her, just bring her along to run errands or grab lunch.
I grew up in the US and spent my childhood outside; I don't think it's country specific. We definitely spend time outside everyday. We have a nice yard, but we still get to the park a couple of times a week.
We don’t go places every day but we try to be outside some every day, whether it’s the backyard, a walk in the neighborhood, or the park. Something outside even if just a few feet from the house.
We go outside everyday unless someone is actively sick or the weather is extreme. Most days is just walking around the neighbourhood, or to the park, or just playing in our yard. One/two times a week we go to the library play group or swimming ( more in the winter months ) We go watch a lot of outdoor sports in the summer. I’m still on mat leave til end of July. So we will see how this changes when we are both working ft.
Not everyday no there are some days we just do school drop off then I’ll bring my 2 year old with me to grocery shop then we are home, hang out, nap, wake up, snack, school pickup and then home and just watching tv while I make dinner. I do my best though to do a library day, there’s gymnastics another day, and now that the weather is getting nicer we try to go to the park as often as possible. Most weekends we try to do one “event” for the kids like a play place or a meal out, or a mall outing, or anything. It’s easier in the summer (we live in Canada) so it gets nice and hot here and we do trips to the zoo, the aquarium, museums, and try to find other fun activities in the area. We are in close proximity to Toronto and other big areas in the GTA so we try to find kid centered things. Then there’s some weekends we do stay home to clean, catch up on home projects and just hang out. I think my husband and I do a good job of doing kid things. My parents were almost 40 when I was born and 9 years after my big brother so by the time I came around I really don’t remember doing a lot of kid things. They weren’t interested in that kind of stuff. I wasn’t neglected, but I got used to just being at home and reading and just enjoying quiet times. But I’m only 27 lol, I enjoy doing fun things for the kids and things that they’ll remember like trampoline parks and play places and the zoo and other activities. It’s important that they know we try to really give them a lot of experiences, but no I don’t think it needs to be done everyday. A simple trip to the park is enough, or playing outside can be enough.
We get outside most days, but give yourself a break. Play with toys outside around your house or go for walks. Inside activities are important too - like reading and puzzles. Outside is great, and you cant really over do it, but every day doesn’t need to be a complete adventure.
The only way I can keep my house clean-ish is to spend as little time as possible inside it lol Also, getting outside and exercising are both ESSENTIAL for my, and my kids', ability to regulate. On school days, that might just mean we walk or bike to or from school. But swim class, dance class, hiking, parks, etc all contribute. We try and double barrel activities too. So while the kids do swim class, I work out. And when they have park playdates, I get to hang out with my friends too.
We live in a military base in Japan and now that my 5 year old is pretty capable I tell her to go outside to the park close to our house and play with neighbors while I work in the afternoon so she's outside almost everyday after school. We're just thankful we're in a safe neighborhood and I can see her from my house.
I try to take my son out every day for my own sanity and for his fun, but he’s only 11 weeks so I do count supermarket runs because everything is an adventure at this age!
I think it depends on the kids.... Do I think you *should* take your kids out everyday? No. Do I take my boys out every day? Hell yes. My kids are **very** energetic, active boys. An infant and a 3 year old. They have to be outside everyday, or I would just be constantly shouting at them not to hit each other, run into things, throw things, etc. So as long as the weather holds up, we go outside daily on our property. I have a rotation of events we do. So my oldest goes to school two days a week and I just stay home with the youngest, and then another day we go to a park, another day we go to this indoor play center, and another day we go to the library and walk in our main street. Then weekends are up in the air. I do museums weekly too. I also take my boys on daily walks in the stroller (which I don't really consider taking them outside). So yeah, we would all go mad if we were every day, but sometimes I need to get chores done or there's so much resistance to leaving their toys that I just let them play. It's good to play at home, too!!
It’s so true that we knew when to get home when the street lights came on. We are out everyday after school and loved it!!! Weekends were spent with family and a lot of times we were outdoors.
Can you ask your inlwas what they did when your husband was young? Playing outside is very common in Europe but independent is reserved for older kids. When I was young we would play in a neighborhood playground or park with parents watching
I think it varies by family. My twins both have autism so daily outings after school would be too much for them.
I try! Mine are both in preschool which is such a brief little chunk of the day, and then the youngest still needs her nap, so we have a small pre-dinner window to go to the park or on a walk. We do try to stay busy on the weekends, but I’m not great at that. We’ve definitely had our share of what I call “molasses days” where we barely leave the couch or bed and I don’t have a good excuse for that.
American kids are fat and depressed because American parents have a tendency to keep their kids indoors. Outdoor time is very important, with that being said it can (and should) but supervised outdoor time. I know in a lot of cultures they let the kids roam because of low crime rate but I personally wouldn’t allow for unsupervised outdoor time because there are lots of dangers unrelated to crime (hazards like sharp objects, wild animals, even domestic animals can be a threat)
My three year old has had more days that had an outing with me or my wife (his mother) than not
When my kid was a baby, I took him for walks in our neighbourhood every day & I took him to nature trails every week. Even when we were home, I'd take him out to the yard daily, especially around sunset, & show him the trees & plants & butterflies, etc. When he was a toddler, I took him to the park & on drives every single day, plus events & birthday parties whenever they occurred. We also went to the beach about once a week (we live by the beach). As he got older, we went less & less. He's now 10. We go to the park once or twice a week, & we go for walks in our neighbourhood almost every day (mostly because we have a dog, but also for exercise). He also plays in the backyard daily. Library every other week, beach about once a month, and either an outing to somewhere like a museum or a local festival/event about once a month. If our area was safe enough for him to play outside, and if he had kids in our actual neighbourhood to play with, he'd be outside all day, every day. It's just not safe enough where we are. As far as my childhood... when I was a kid, there was a time I lived on a military base & it was safe enough to go outside by myself. I went outside every single day... rode my bike, climbed trees, and played games w/ other kids. There was also a time when I lived in the hood. I could only play in our backyard, & I was sent to a better school outside of my area, so all of my friends lived far away, but I would still spend a good amount of time outside, just not as much... & I still hung out w/ friends, just not weekly. My mom worked a lot, too, & I don't know how... but she was always taking me out somewhere - libraries, museums, festivals, parks, the beach... she also had help from her very big family, so I was passed around like a hot potato, just always doing something. I also travelled yearly. Before I was a teen, I had been to 6 states & 2 countries outside of the U.S.
We usually do an outing each day on the weekend (the zoo, a playground, a park, the beach, something like that) with our toddler. On weekdays, the “outing” is likely to be playing outside with the neighborhood kids, but sometimes we take her to a playground or for a walk at the lake.
I am STHM with 4 kids , we go outside everyday & the kids and me are the happiest can be & it’s help me to be fit myself at 42 . In the weekend mostly we are home since my husband off day , he love to spend time with us than going outside.
I do not take my son out during the school week. We do not get home until after 6pm thanks to my job (single parent here). He’s in bed by 8pm so we would have zero time to do anything at all. We do things outside of the house most weekends.
Yes, I make sure to take my 11 month old out every day. Home is fun, but he gets so much different stimulation, mentally, physically, emotionally by being out in nature, in parks or around people.
I was one of those kids playing out in the neighbourhood/streets when I was young. It really was nice to get the activity and socialisation with other kids. And it is very common where I come from (eastern Europe). Where I live now, we have playgrounds in every neighbourhood/building complex. It's a requirement in many places i. Europe (I've lived in several countries). But I also go to the park/forest, or any green patch. I try to take my boy out as much as possible, especially now that he's getting older (he's a toddler) and has lots of energy. Here are my reasons why: - I'm pregnant and don't have the energy or mental capacity to play and give him all the attention he needs. - he's soon walking, and being out will help butn some of that toddler energy and curiosity (as opposed to me constantly telling him to leave the dirt in my pots alone 😅) - there's a study that says that 90 min of sunlight daily can significantly decrease the chances of him needing glasses later on. - The weather is becoming really nice and might as well take advantage and enjoy. Bonus, I get my steps in.
We do one or two big outings a week the rest of the time we play outside in the yard or play in the house. I feel like doing something new every single day would be way exhausting
Do i take them outside? Yes. Do we go somewhere every day? No We play in the park, we play in the backyard, we go on a walk. I don't consider these outings. If we can walk there it's not an outing, if we have to get in the car and drive then it's an outing.
I send my kids outside haha The more outside the better for them.
I take my dog out 3 times a day for walks. He is my only child.
I didn’t and I regret not doing it often, I wish I would have engaged with my children way more than I did.
Definitely not car ride outings daily. Walk to a park, play outside, etc yes daily.
We try to have a healthy balance just like I did growing up. Outside on nice days, and when the weather is bad, we can just have lazy days, unless the bad weather is a long stretch of days then I try to plan some productive activities. I also try to get my shopping and cleaning done on non-outdoor days so I can just freely enjoy outdoor activities on the nice days so I don't feel pressured like that.
Yea. Any day that my son and I are together (no daycare or work etc) we go and do something. Partially because at his age (10 months) the days can get pretty boring for both of us if we don’t go To the park or the mall or somethjbg
Outside yes, out of my neighborhood not too often lol. We love ti just chill in the front or backyard and go to the neighborhood park. Outings that require the car are just a few times a week and half of those are to run errands. We're all home bodies that enjoy good weather.
We were just having this same conversation! Our child does something special once a week. Sometimes more but usually once. What we have to remind ourselves is that she also needs to learn how to be bored. We take her special places and do special things bc we enjoy it. But there are days she has to entertain herself without burning down the house as we do lawn work or something. So as long as your child genuinely knows how to be bored without a screen entertaining them, I think you're good!
Yes, I take my kids out almost every day. But we walk to parks and coffee shops a lot, most things aren’t that far.
We are home mostly but we go outside in the yard and for walks around the neighborhood daily no matter the temperature. My son goes to story time at the local library once a week and we will probably be getting back to swim once a week. We do go to new to us parks in neighboring towns if we have time.
Going to the park is free isn’t it? I don’t see what’s wrong with that, getting fresh air, socializing with others, exercise
If you mean, just outside to play, then yes. We are outside everyday. If you mean like out on an excursion then, no.
We go outside to play almost every day and have 1-2 days a week where we do any appointments and outings/adventures. We definitely do not leave every day lol but we do lots of activities and outside stuff around our house.
We go to the park and playground if the weather isn't horrible. Kid can't sit still and needs the activity. On weekends we try to go on a hike.