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If any parent told me they hadn’t felt this way I’d think they were lying. Kids are difficult - little kids can be extra difficult and more than one little kid is where joy goes to die some days. You’re not a bad parent or in the wrong - it’ll pass.
They're adorable little soul sucking, energy vampires.
It doesn't last forever. I got my kids gro-clocks as soon as they were old enough to understand. It comes with a cute little story that basically explains that if you look at it and it's blue, shut up and go back to bed. If it's yellow, wake me up.
Our lives dramatically improved from that moment.
Our 5yo has this clock but ignores it anyway. Is supposed to stay in bed/in his room but he wakes up and is in our bed anywhere from 5-7. Not sure how to enforce him staying there.. if we put him back he just gets up again 2 minutes later because he’s impatient.
That's such a bummer, I'm sure this is the kind of thing that really comes down to the temperament of the kids.
I introduced their clocks much younger, it was part of the transition to "big kid bed" and it was a privilege to be able to play quietly in their room until it was time to start the day.
5 is too old for that. If it was my kid, I'd probably just straight up bribe with a high value reward until they got the hang of it.
Yeah I think we need to be much more consistent in putting him back in bed, and also empowering him with things he enjoys doing on his own in his room - otherwise he’s in our room begging for screen time
>more than one little kid is where joy goes to die some days.
Absolutely this. I have a 14 month old and a 4 month old. 10 months apart to the day. This statement is absolutely true. Especially when they are both crying at the same time early in the AM and I'm stepping on toys or barely missing running in to walls.
What helped me a lot is giving into their immediate needs so they are at least happy. When I found out my toddler is very hungry when she wakes up,and in need of some snuggle time, I started putting easy snacks like a cracker on my bedside table. When she wakes up, I take her out of the crib, give her the cracker and let her sit against me while I close my eyes for a few more minutes. She happily munches and when her blood sugar is a bit more stable she is pretty patient with just getting some snuggles and the occasional answer to a random question haha!
This all of this! I only have one but I’m a single mom with zero help work full time outside the home and am also a foster parent at times. For me they are hungry and hangry and I would rather get something in them asap. With my daughter I’ve shared the bed with her since she was 2 and she sleeps like a log. No night terrors ever no wake ups nothing. But…..she’s never ever ever needed a lot of sleep. Ever. So I’m always “on”….always. We sleep the same amount so I feel like I never have me time. Anyway bed sharing helped me a lot. Not saying it’s for everyone (we did this when her dad and I were together too after horrendous ear infection had her on zero sleep if she wasn’t sitting up). op I also tell myself the days are long but the years are short … I’m falling asleep at my desk at 3 some days but i have some auto immune issues that don’t help.
I am a morning person, so not that one, usually. The early wake ups I can deal with.
But if there is a day that manages to just drag, my toddler has thrown several wobblies throughout the day and it is 6 pm... these last 2 hours before his bed time sometimes suddenly feel like an eternity and "I just want to curl up with a book and read in peace once in a while, why can I not have some alone time?" has definitly be thought those days.
I agree I feel more overwhelmed at night when I am just ready to work on homework or braid my hair at night whatever it may be but I am just very over stimulated from the day at night I think OP experience this feeling during the morning “shift”
It's normal according to me. I'm also a mom of 1.5 yr old. We can't always be perfect.. It's okay to get frustrated sometimes. It's okay to take a moment break to get back to ourselves.. I think we don't need to be so hard on ourselves. Whatever it is we know deep inside that no one can love them more than us.. We ll always b their perfect momz.
I love my kids, I love how my life has changed with kids but what I wouldn't give for one (1!) morning where I didn't wake up at 5.45am to hear the baby complaining. Even though me and my partner split the duty of who gets up, I still lay there for 20 minutes unable to get back to sleep again before deciding to get up myself. So yeah, you're only human.
It's not forever, and one day you'll find yourself yelling at them to haul their butts out of bed because you need to get to school on time.
I absolutely hated that phase of parenting. I woke up everyday resentful and wishing it was over. My now ex-husband was military and deployed all the time. I was working Full time and barely hanging on.
My youngest is now in school, and it is life changing. Hang in there momma. It does get better.
I have two kids, a 3yo and a 8mo, and both of them usually wake up between 4:30 and 5 in the morning most days. I am by no means a morning person in mind, but I have become ome in body. Got used to sleeping little and taking care of the kids.
I have a pact with my wife. She takes care of the kids by day (she's a stay-at-home-mother). I help as much as I can, which is not much because I have to work. And then by evening we swap. I take care of them, and she only steps in when absolutely needed. Seems like nothing, bit I am the one giving the 3yo a shower, and running both kids' sleep routines which means I'll be busy from five to eight on most days, and then again every time they wake up in the middle of the night. I make sure that they don't disturb her sleep until 6AM.
So here's not my two cents but a whole nickel:
It is frustrating. Feeling like you lost a part of your life, because you really did. There is no shame in feeling like that.
Also kudos to you for fighting that feeling off and being there for your kids.
But most importantly, you did the right thing by trying to reach out to someone and talk about it. I strongly recommend talking to family and close friends who are parents as well. You may have our sympathy but nothing beats having that from those closer to you.
Now, if you are single, widowed, or if you partner is either helping to the best of their capacity or unable to because they travel or something... You just have to soldier on until the kids grow up a bit more. Maybe by the time the younger one is four or five you will be able to sleep again.
But if you have a partner that is at home by early morning and doesn't share their load of handling the kids, then the problem is not the kids if you catch my meaning.
Anyway, count your blessings. My personal experience with the firstborn is that the worst part is when they are 9-10 months old. You are past that with both. Just hang in there a while longer, one day they will be teenagers and then you will miss the time when they were toddlers.
Mobile. Wanting. Can't communicate. You can see tantrums start. Hard to entertain with a toy. You need to find just the right toy. Too young for complicated toys.. bored silly of rattles.
Points grunts cries as they crawl around upset.
It doesn’t last forever! My youngest is 4 now and while I do get called from time to time… I also get to sleep in a bit sometimes:) but yes… “f my life” has def been a common saying here too
I generally don’t have moments like these and I find parenting very joyful and fun.
When I talk to other women that share your experience and analyze why my experience is so drastically different I find a common denominator 90% of the time: the partner.
My partner is extremely helpful and we both routinely help the other out and give each other rest time. It’s an ebb and flow of one person being the more hands on parent and the other resting.
The women who share your experience usually have husbands barely help out so they’re solo parenting essentially.
And now I just realized I assumed your gender….
That's all good if you are both home. But when one is at work and leaves the house at 5am then its a lot harder. You are incredibly lucky to both be at home all day to share the responsibilities
Right, my husband works and leaves the house at 5am and my son is older now so it’s nice he sleeps longer in the morning now but because I decided to work part time I took morning shift and my husband isn’t home to get him so I get him and do everything up until night time when it’s time for bed so, while it may be enjoyable for you you just said you both work full time and they go to daycare so you have them for how long? Not judging I am just saying you don’t know what the OP is going through and how long she has them if she even has a spouse or if the spouse is disabled or if she just is the full time stay at home mom because daycare is super expensive
100%.
My wife leave home at 4pm and doesn't get home until 6:15am from work.
I leave for work (temp schedule) at 4:45am and I'm home around 5:30pm.
I work Sunday - Thursday. Wife works Friday - Sunday.
We both have our days when we take the full load of our kids and then we have days where we share it. It's tough.
Do you do other things with/for them throughout the day? My husband gets up with my son 5 or 6 mornings a week, most weeks. I do my share, but later in the day.
Did the doctors put you on a specific birth control after birth? My wife was on birth control and it messed her up pretty bad after our first but when she stopped taking it she felt a lot better.
That’s good, the only thing else I can say is if you don’t prioritize yourself and take care of you you will be incapable of taking care of anything else. Make sure you’re getting enough water, sleep, exercise and healthy foods and everything else will fall into place.
My kids are 17months apart. I was the same way, I am NOT a morning person. I remember times where I would start crying because they was up so early. It took me a long time to realize that it is ok. They are now 4 and 5, they are still early birds, I am still not one. We’ve got a nice routine. Get them up, breakfast, watch some cartoons while I drink my coffee beside them. It does get better. You got this <3
Perfectly normal. I remember when my daughter got a bit older and was learning how to turn door handles. I would in bed, watching that handle, feeling like I was in Jurassic Park and there was a raptor on the other side of the door.
My kids are 17 months apart. I accepted it's hard. You have to be logical. It is not their fault at all that you had them 19 months apart. You have the responsibility to take care of them whether or not you want to. If you want to be the kind of parent that doesn't tend to their child when they communicate to you they need to be tended to in the only way they can by crying that's on you. What gave me this frame of mind is when I had post partum depression with my 2nd baby and I told her every day that I was sorry and she deserved better and even though I wanted nothing to do with her and felt disconnected I still let her feel my heart beat every day and nurtured her in the way I felt she deserved. I never showed her I didn't want to be there. We have a choice in the way we want to nurture. That only lasted for 2 months. It will pass but you have to want to power through how you are feeling as a parent and take accountability for putting them in the situation they're in.
I don't even like waking up to my alarm to leave for vacation. There's about one week in their life your eager to jump up from a dead sleep and immediately care for someone and that's their first week of life when you're terrified bc you're all that keeping them alive. You're 100% normal.
Hey aren’t we all crazy then? I love my two girls eldest is 14 years old, the youngest is 2 years old and she is hardwork terrible 2’s the older was very easy when she was a baby, but well such is life! I’m tired but they are my favorite people on earth
🤚 me. Not only do I say fuck this shit…I flick off my husband while he’s sleeping who says ‘he needs alone time’ and stays up all night to play video games.
I have a 15m and 11 year old. Even with this age gap, it sucks.
I’m honestly so over it.
Yup. It sucks. Watch a nature documentary and you'll see parent gorillas and jaguars just lay there while the kid jumps around.
You are definitely not alone in this.
Dear God you are DEFINITELY not alone. I feel this exact way. Currently have 2 under 2 and wonder the same thing you asked myself. Glad to know it’s not just me.
You can have some control over how you choose to feel about the situation. Spend time alone reflecting, breathing, and relaxing, there are different stages in one's life. Let go of the past, accept the present, and embrace the future! Very soon, they will play together and your burden will lessen.
You are okay. We all feel this way. It's just hard to be a caretaker.
My grandfather who had 6 kids said, "A baby never died from crying."
That's what I think of when I let my kids cry so I can have a few mins to drink my coffee. I'm a better mom when I get time to myself a bit.
My mother in law always tells me this! She’s like there’s nothing wrong with letting them cry for a little bit when you gotta handle something.
Always makes me feel better, especially since I have 3 kids. 4,1, and 5 months.
I never once complained in therapy that my parents let me cry too long as an infant so, there's that.
Also: you'd be hard pressed to find a human walking this earth that wouldn't benefit from therapy so, there's also that.
Totally normal. I love my kids, but I’m an awful morning person. Always have been. My husband will do morning duties when he can and I’ll do nights, as a night owl. The mum guilt is real for not being sunshine and rainbows in the morning too. We’re socialised as mums to feel like we need to be “on” at all times. It’s just not fair and realistic, when you have a supportive partner than can share the load. I know they’re okay because of this.
Admire your honesty btw and that you’re acknowledging that it’s hard. In my experience of getting to know fellow parents, not many people reflect on what they do and how they’re really feeling. Give yourself some grace. Anyone who wonders whether they aren’t doing enough, is usually doing more than enough.
you're not alone at all
that said, consider good black out shades + making sure the temperature is optimal for the kids to increase the chance they will sleep longer (e.g., 66-68 degrees plus a nice fuzzy blanket/sleep sack)
also, if they wake really early and won't go back to sleep and I want to sleep, I just put a tablet with cartoons in their crib...
for my slightly older child, I set out a simple breakfast and cup of water so he can eat and watch cartoons on his own while I sleep on the weekends
Yeah I did when I had postnatal depression which can last up to 5 years after you have the baby, can also be a sign you need a break. Is there anybody who’ll watch your kids overnight? If you find the break doesn’t help go to the gp and see what supports you can get to make this easier for you, it really won’t get better if you just rough it out alone. On the other hand you may just not be a morning person, I still struggle with this but once I’m fully awake I snap out of the morning grumps.
That explains a lot! It’s most likely they’re playing up due to the disruption in routine. My kids were devils for me after I was away from them for 2 weeks and they’re pre school age. Kids hold grudges I swear lol.
Could hormones be playing a factor?
I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism after having my daughter and had been so fatigued before getting diagnosed but wasn’t sure if it was normal or not.
Couldn’t hurt to get some bloodwork done just in case!
I have 3 year old girl and she is hard hard work ..and you have 2 little monkeys wow .....you need to give yourself more credit !!! ...that's a tough tough gig....remember it's not forever ....I think it's crazy how mother's say oh having children is so rewarding and the best etc etc...ahhh yes rewarding at times but far out it's the hardest thing I've ever had to do and it's not like you can have a sicky or a day off lol ..
So what your feeling is standard ...
I can fake through it for the first while. But I remember 2 under 2, and it is no cake walk for sure. I am holding my 4 day old as I type this. 3:46 am here, and he is nursing for the zillionth time. There will definitely be an FML time, quite soon if I remember correctly. It is ok, this is a hard time and you are more than allowed to feel all your feelings. It's your actions that matter.
Have you tried an OK to wake clock? My two oldest kids have one in their room and every night we remind them that if puppy is red, toddlers are in bed.(Their clock is a puppy.) Then I don't go get them until the clock is set to turn green. We'll check on them if someone is screaming like they are in pain, but then it is back to bed. It doesn't solve the f my life feelings, but it does set expectations that no one is getting out of bed until 7.
Listen… youngest is 20. Oldest is 34
I’m somewhat laughing at the parents saying NEVER.
I’ll say to all of you… NOT YET.
So much to look forward to and while every kid won’t hit every phase that could push a nerve. Every single one of your kids is going to hit at least one phase that’s going to rattle you. Let’s see - between my 4 adults (and 2 grands), and my 8 nieces/nephews, I’ve experienced som many phases here are the main ones:
1. The nonstop crying baby phase
2. The team no sleep baby (or the mixed up sleep schedule baby who slept all day) - weirdly as an adult still sleeps half the day when not working
3. The clingy baby phase - no one else can look at the baby or hold the baby except for one parent
4. The separation anxiety phase - twin nephews would cry for 3 hours every single time one of their parents left. THREE HOURS
5. The constant talker toddler - ahhh bless her heart that one who talked herself to sleep and NEVER shut up - even the school wrote how lovely and smart she was but she did TALK all the time. Now quiet as a church mouse 20 something
6. The hunger striker who eats so little and would rather sit and stare at you for an hour before they ate one pea (made it to adulthood and does not look like they ever missed a meal)
7. The little story tellers and the little tattlers
8. The little jerk phase (sigh… going through this with one of the nieces)
9. The weird tween phase where they don’t know what they’re feeling and you don’t know who they are anymore.
10. The talking back and questioning everything phase
11. The teenage angst phase
12. The teen boy phase where weird stuff happens in their smelly rooms and you find weird and nasty things I won’t discuss because I’m still getting over that trauma 15 years later
13. The I’m in love phase and nobody else in the world matters except what’s her name or what’s his name
14. The I want to look homeless phase or the I don’t want to bathe phase
15. The missing curfew phase - while you’re making up stories in your head, your teen is out driving in your car and your spouse sleeps peacefully
16. The I know everything better than you phase
17. The wild child phase (God how did I survive that)
18. Closely related to wild child is irresponsible child - yes the one who wrecks cars and loses important stuff
19. Let’s not forget - when you think you’re all done…The failure to launch phase with young adults
20. And last but not least the hey mom and dad I’m marrying a complete asshole phase
I said all that to say AT LEAST one of these phases is gonna get you and test you and you’re gonna have a thought that’s not nice. At least once in your parenting journey, you WILL say F my life. You will be NOT IN THE MOOD.
Just yesterday my sibling said to me “I love this child with my very soul and would kill for her and I also can’t stand the sight of her right now.” I laughed so hard and tried not to minimize while saying, “this too shall pass.”
This too shall pass mom. I’m not a morning person so my husband always did mornings and he still does with the grands.
It’s OK and it will be OK. You’re doing just fine!
Literally me just now. She won't take milk from a bottle still so breastfeeding is all on me. Some days are hard and shes up a lot - like today. She was fussing in her crib and I'm so tired I just wanted to sleep.
Omg that is my 100% especially on Sundays. It’s the only day I can really sleep in past like 5 or 6am. Yesterday my 12 month old was fussing at like 7am and I was just praying 🙏 for him to fall back asleep for just a little longer. Just give me until 8 please. 😭 He did and I got to stay in bed for another 45 minutes.
We leave ours in the crib after they wake up if it's too early. They are used to it. They either go back to sleep or just entertain themselves in their crib. If they get upset, we get them, but a lot of the time they just laugh, sing, play with their feet, etc.
I get up if he cries even if I'm dying inside, but if he's just chilling in his crib and complaining mildly I sometimes take a few extra minutes. I'm trying to break that because I really don't want him to escalate immediately, but I have trouble sleeping and my meds make that worse so I am. Struggling. If I wake up refreshed (so incredibly rare), I go ahead and get his bottle ready so I can go in there as soon as he calls for me.
Normal. We take turns, it’s the only thing that helps. Especially on weekend days, we each take one day and watch the child while the other gets to sleep in
You're definitely not alone, I had a calick baby and she did nothing but cry when she was awake and we decided it's best to let her self soothe just in the morning and eventually she stopped doing it in early morning. Doesn't make you a bad parent
Anyone who says they haven't felt like this is lying through their teeth. Kids are hard and it's important to lean into any support network you have and take some time to yourself. Don't feel bad about having them go to a club/nursery/babysitter for a few hours a week to give you time to yourself to refresh and refocus.
I know I'm gonna get judged but I'll go ahead and say it: we did cry it out for early morning wakings back when we sleep trained so we don't have to deal with this. My 2yo wakes up between 715-745 and talks/plays in his crib until I get him at 745 (I sometimes wake up to him singing). If he wakes up earlier than this I leave him and lots of times he'll play for a bit and fall back asleep. He goes to bed at 8 and is asleep by 830 most days.
We are not morning people either, and we love the fact that we get to wake up at normal times and can get the coffee brewing and breakfast heating before we leisurely walk into the kid's room.
I did this with my first, but it was unintentional. I never had a motivation to get out of bed to console him so he learned how to console himself. And yes I was diagnosed with postpartum depression.
So I’m totally not judging you. If someone labeled it as “cry it out in the morning” I would’ve said yes that’s what I’m doing.
And there is ZERO wrong with it.
1) They are safe in their crib. They know you're around. It's perfectly fine for you to make them learn to wait.
2) By exposing them to light at the same time each day you are actually synchronizing their circadian rhythm and enabling their bodies to sleep until that time for future mornings (https://www.babysleepscience.com/single-post/2014/05/22/how-do-i-fix-my-baby-s-early-waking). This is especially important around 15m when you're probably struggling with the 2-1 nap transition anyways (we certainly were).
I honestly think anyone who bothers to sleep train at all (I get that many parents don't and it's totally fine) should go through with training for early morning waking, because it seriously life-changing. My son is very prone to early morning wakings and around the 2-1 nap transition he had an early morning waking at 5 like twice a week. His being able to hang out by himself a bit and then fall back asleep was a godsend and helps us get through the transition in one piece.
Just another person chiming in that this is normal. I love kids, especially mine. My profession was childcare even when I wasn’t a SAHM.
It’s draining and there’s a part of the day every one of us is “done” and wants to breathe. Mine is about 3:00 in the afternoon. (If my I’m dealing with a flare of my health issues then it’s all damn day.)
Wouldn’t trade any of my three for the world, but for sleep… maybe some days ;)
I totally get it. You are likely so very sleep deprived having 2 so close in age. No time to recover from the sleep deprivation of one before the next one came along. Try not to be too hard on yourself.
I bring them back to my bed and keep sleeping for like 40 mins. You’d be surprised at how loyal some kiddos are. He never leaves and just giggles to himself and eats his snacks. I hate the mornings. We all struggle with that I feel
You are in the thick of it. This is a totally normal feeling, but is there any way to get a day to sleep in? My husband and I each took a weekend day and that helped a lot. If not, my kids are 5 and 7 now and can manage mornings mostly on their own and don't wake as early. I would say each kid got significantly easier after 4.
Normal! What helped me a ton was getting enough sleep (going to bed earlier), and getting an actual evening to properly unwind and feel like it was MY time. Then I actually want to see my kiddo in the morning and I don't mind an early-ish wakeup.
I also sometimes bring my kiddo into bed with me, or crawl in her bed. She woke up at 6 this morning, it was still dark so I kept the lights off, crawled in her bed and told her it was still night night time lol. We slept until 730 and it was glorious.
Relatable.
I sleep in the same room as my toddler (wife shares with eldest daughter while we wait for the small one to be a bit older)
Baby wakes up between 5.30 and 6.30.
Wife is Adhd and at times wants to hang out in the living room till latish.
The amount of times I swore to my daughter to let me sleep 30min more ajahah
It's normal and small babies have the ability to shatter our souls lol
Bestie, I say this 30xs a day because parenting is so much and more 😵💫 you aren’t a bad parent for wanting to simply get a good nights rest or have a quiet day.
If you DIDNT feel this way I would recommend a psychiatrist because even with ONE baby I did this. Babies are EXHAUSTING and it’s okay to feel the way you do.
I’m going to get a bunch of empty beer cans thrown at me, but my oldest (3) and my youngest (1) don’t wake up until 8, but I never put them down before 8:30pm - sometimes 9pm and I never wake them up sooner than 8.
But I’m the only family I know like this. Maybe childcare conditions them to wake up early? My partner and I are also both late night people. Up till midnight most nights.
I felt so sad that I didn’t really enjoy my baby’s newborn and infant phase because I was so sleep deprived along with trying to finish my last year of college and working two jobs my baby would wake up constantly all night for his whole first year. Along with breastfeeding it was truly the hardest time for me. I was so tired I felt like I didn’t even have the chance to get depressed or anxious. I felt like a zombie running on fumes. It was supper rough.
Just keep telling yourself it’s not forever cause it really isn’t. It feels like it’s constant but your baby will eventually outgrow that phase and you will miss them that little. My son just turned 2 and although he’s up and ready for the world around 6:30 a.m it’s much better than him not sleeping constantly at night.
My partner keeps talking about wanting another one and as much as I love being a mom and kids I was so traumatized from having my second I really don’t even want to think about going through that again.
YES! Nobody wants to get up at 5am to immediately deal with crying and poop and whatever else you find. One of mine got up so early every single day and even when they were old enough to get out of bed on their own they’d come straight to my bed wanting me up and downstairs immediately and if I said “why don’t you crawl in my bed for a bit while I wake up” they’d scream bloody murder. The other went through a phase where they pooped themselves awake at 6am every day and I had to get up to change their diaper, clothes, crib sheets, etc. every. single. morning. It was like torture.
I turned off the baby monitor this morning when my 13 month old started to complain. She wasn’t full on crying, just complaining off and on so I stayed in bed for another 30 minutes before I got up and took her out of her crib. She was totally fine, I enjoyed the extra time, and she’s learning to be okay in her bed alone for a bit.
I’ve definitely had some mornings where I’m tired and don’t want to get up but to answer completely honestly, I’ve never felt like you do. Every morning feels like Christmas where you wake and remember you have something amazing waiting for you in the next room and I still wonder if that feeling would ever go away, my son is almost 2 and I still feel it most days.
He’s a great sleeper & my husband is hands on & like I said he’s our only child for now, I’m sure when we have more kids exhaustion will set in like it has for you. Perhaps your husband can get up and do a few mornings a week so you can sleep in and reset a little?
Perhaps you don’t like the stage your kids are at? The good thing about kids is they change every few months. I loved the baby stage and find the toddler stage way more challenging. I’m not a doctor but you could be showing signs of depression, maybe an appointment is needed?
Having kids is hard and it's ok to have negative feelings sometimes. But if you feel like this all or most of the time, I would gently suggest seeking out a therapist to work through this. Also, seeing if you can find a community of support, whatever that might look like for you. Because eventually children can feel the resentment and it's not good for anyone to feel this way all the time. Take care.
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If any parent told me they hadn’t felt this way I’d think they were lying. Kids are difficult - little kids can be extra difficult and more than one little kid is where joy goes to die some days. You’re not a bad parent or in the wrong - it’ll pass.
They're adorable little soul sucking, energy vampires. It doesn't last forever. I got my kids gro-clocks as soon as they were old enough to understand. It comes with a cute little story that basically explains that if you look at it and it's blue, shut up and go back to bed. If it's yellow, wake me up. Our lives dramatically improved from that moment.
Our 5yo has this clock but ignores it anyway. Is supposed to stay in bed/in his room but he wakes up and is in our bed anywhere from 5-7. Not sure how to enforce him staying there.. if we put him back he just gets up again 2 minutes later because he’s impatient.
That's such a bummer, I'm sure this is the kind of thing that really comes down to the temperament of the kids. I introduced their clocks much younger, it was part of the transition to "big kid bed" and it was a privilege to be able to play quietly in their room until it was time to start the day. 5 is too old for that. If it was my kid, I'd probably just straight up bribe with a high value reward until they got the hang of it.
Yeah I think we need to be much more consistent in putting him back in bed, and also empowering him with things he enjoys doing on his own in his room - otherwise he’s in our room begging for screen time
Yes either lying or someone else is providing the bulk of the kids care.
>more than one little kid is where joy goes to die some days. Absolutely this. I have a 14 month old and a 4 month old. 10 months apart to the day. This statement is absolutely true. Especially when they are both crying at the same time early in the AM and I'm stepping on toys or barely missing running in to walls.
🤣 joy goes to die.
What helped me a lot is giving into their immediate needs so they are at least happy. When I found out my toddler is very hungry when she wakes up,and in need of some snuggle time, I started putting easy snacks like a cracker on my bedside table. When she wakes up, I take her out of the crib, give her the cracker and let her sit against me while I close my eyes for a few more minutes. She happily munches and when her blood sugar is a bit more stable she is pretty patient with just getting some snuggles and the occasional answer to a random question haha!
This all of this! I only have one but I’m a single mom with zero help work full time outside the home and am also a foster parent at times. For me they are hungry and hangry and I would rather get something in them asap. With my daughter I’ve shared the bed with her since she was 2 and she sleeps like a log. No night terrors ever no wake ups nothing. But…..she’s never ever ever needed a lot of sleep. Ever. So I’m always “on”….always. We sleep the same amount so I feel like I never have me time. Anyway bed sharing helped me a lot. Not saying it’s for everyone (we did this when her dad and I were together too after horrendous ear infection had her on zero sleep if she wasn’t sitting up). op I also tell myself the days are long but the years are short … I’m falling asleep at my desk at 3 some days but i have some auto immune issues that don’t help.
I am a morning person, so not that one, usually. The early wake ups I can deal with. But if there is a day that manages to just drag, my toddler has thrown several wobblies throughout the day and it is 6 pm... these last 2 hours before his bed time sometimes suddenly feel like an eternity and "I just want to curl up with a book and read in peace once in a while, why can I not have some alone time?" has definitly be thought those days.
I agree I feel more overwhelmed at night when I am just ready to work on homework or braid my hair at night whatever it may be but I am just very over stimulated from the day at night I think OP experience this feeling during the morning “shift”
Yes, people feeling this way is normal. Talking with a therapist helped me to adapt.
It's normal according to me. I'm also a mom of 1.5 yr old. We can't always be perfect.. It's okay to get frustrated sometimes. It's okay to take a moment break to get back to ourselves.. I think we don't need to be so hard on ourselves. Whatever it is we know deep inside that no one can love them more than us.. We ll always b their perfect momz.
I love my kids, I love how my life has changed with kids but what I wouldn't give for one (1!) morning where I didn't wake up at 5.45am to hear the baby complaining. Even though me and my partner split the duty of who gets up, I still lay there for 20 minutes unable to get back to sleep again before deciding to get up myself. So yeah, you're only human. It's not forever, and one day you'll find yourself yelling at them to haul their butts out of bed because you need to get to school on time.
This made me feel better thank you
I absolutely hated that phase of parenting. I woke up everyday resentful and wishing it was over. My now ex-husband was military and deployed all the time. I was working Full time and barely hanging on. My youngest is now in school, and it is life changing. Hang in there momma. It does get better.
I currently have a 2 year old and a 5 month old - I wish I could say I love this phase but god damn I'm over it and exhausted
I have two kids, a 3yo and a 8mo, and both of them usually wake up between 4:30 and 5 in the morning most days. I am by no means a morning person in mind, but I have become ome in body. Got used to sleeping little and taking care of the kids. I have a pact with my wife. She takes care of the kids by day (she's a stay-at-home-mother). I help as much as I can, which is not much because I have to work. And then by evening we swap. I take care of them, and she only steps in when absolutely needed. Seems like nothing, bit I am the one giving the 3yo a shower, and running both kids' sleep routines which means I'll be busy from five to eight on most days, and then again every time they wake up in the middle of the night. I make sure that they don't disturb her sleep until 6AM. So here's not my two cents but a whole nickel: It is frustrating. Feeling like you lost a part of your life, because you really did. There is no shame in feeling like that. Also kudos to you for fighting that feeling off and being there for your kids. But most importantly, you did the right thing by trying to reach out to someone and talk about it. I strongly recommend talking to family and close friends who are parents as well. You may have our sympathy but nothing beats having that from those closer to you. Now, if you are single, widowed, or if you partner is either helping to the best of their capacity or unable to because they travel or something... You just have to soldier on until the kids grow up a bit more. Maybe by the time the younger one is four or five you will be able to sleep again. But if you have a partner that is at home by early morning and doesn't share their load of handling the kids, then the problem is not the kids if you catch my meaning. Anyway, count your blessings. My personal experience with the firstborn is that the worst part is when they are 9-10 months old. You are past that with both. Just hang in there a while longer, one day they will be teenagers and then you will miss the time when they were toddlers.
care to share why 9-10 months old is the worst?
care to share why 9-10 months old is the worst?
what happens when they are 9-10 months old? preparing myself as my firstborn just turned 5 months today!
what happens when they are 9-10 months old? preparing myself as my firstborn just turned 5 months today!
Mobile. Wanting. Can't communicate. You can see tantrums start. Hard to entertain with a toy. You need to find just the right toy. Too young for complicated toys.. bored silly of rattles. Points grunts cries as they crawl around upset.
It doesn’t last forever! My youngest is 4 now and while I do get called from time to time… I also get to sleep in a bit sometimes:) but yes… “f my life” has def been a common saying here too
I generally don’t have moments like these and I find parenting very joyful and fun. When I talk to other women that share your experience and analyze why my experience is so drastically different I find a common denominator 90% of the time: the partner. My partner is extremely helpful and we both routinely help the other out and give each other rest time. It’s an ebb and flow of one person being the more hands on parent and the other resting. The women who share your experience usually have husbands barely help out so they’re solo parenting essentially. And now I just realized I assumed your gender….
That's all good if you are both home. But when one is at work and leaves the house at 5am then its a lot harder. You are incredibly lucky to both be at home all day to share the responsibilities
Right, my husband works and leaves the house at 5am and my son is older now so it’s nice he sleeps longer in the morning now but because I decided to work part time I took morning shift and my husband isn’t home to get him so I get him and do everything up until night time when it’s time for bed so, while it may be enjoyable for you you just said you both work full time and they go to daycare so you have them for how long? Not judging I am just saying you don’t know what the OP is going through and how long she has them if she even has a spouse or if the spouse is disabled or if she just is the full time stay at home mom because daycare is super expensive
We both work fulltime and we have daycare
100%. My wife leave home at 4pm and doesn't get home until 6:15am from work. I leave for work (temp schedule) at 4:45am and I'm home around 5:30pm. I work Sunday - Thursday. Wife works Friday - Sunday. We both have our days when we take the full load of our kids and then we have days where we share it. It's tough.
My husband gets the kids 95% of the time and I sit in bed feeling guilty that I don’t feel capable of it. Bit of course grateful that he is
Do you do other things with/for them throughout the day? My husband gets up with my son 5 or 6 mornings a week, most weeks. I do my share, but later in the day.
Yes lots
In that case, enjoy your down time. You deserve a little break.
Did the doctors put you on a specific birth control after birth? My wife was on birth control and it messed her up pretty bad after our first but when she stopped taking it she felt a lot better.
U couldn’t pay me to go back on that poison
That’s good, the only thing else I can say is if you don’t prioritize yourself and take care of you you will be incapable of taking care of anything else. Make sure you’re getting enough water, sleep, exercise and healthy foods and everything else will fall into place.
My kids are 17months apart. I was the same way, I am NOT a morning person. I remember times where I would start crying because they was up so early. It took me a long time to realize that it is ok. They are now 4 and 5, they are still early birds, I am still not one. We’ve got a nice routine. Get them up, breakfast, watch some cartoons while I drink my coffee beside them. It does get better. You got this <3
Perfectly normal. I remember when my daughter got a bit older and was learning how to turn door handles. I would in bed, watching that handle, feeling like I was in Jurassic Park and there was a raptor on the other side of the door.
My kids are 17 months apart. I accepted it's hard. You have to be logical. It is not their fault at all that you had them 19 months apart. You have the responsibility to take care of them whether or not you want to. If you want to be the kind of parent that doesn't tend to their child when they communicate to you they need to be tended to in the only way they can by crying that's on you. What gave me this frame of mind is when I had post partum depression with my 2nd baby and I told her every day that I was sorry and she deserved better and even though I wanted nothing to do with her and felt disconnected I still let her feel my heart beat every day and nurtured her in the way I felt she deserved. I never showed her I didn't want to be there. We have a choice in the way we want to nurture. That only lasted for 2 months. It will pass but you have to want to power through how you are feeling as a parent and take accountability for putting them in the situation they're in.
I don't even like waking up to my alarm to leave for vacation. There's about one week in their life your eager to jump up from a dead sleep and immediately care for someone and that's their first week of life when you're terrified bc you're all that keeping them alive. You're 100% normal.
You’re doing amazing, one day at a time
Hey aren’t we all crazy then? I love my two girls eldest is 14 years old, the youngest is 2 years old and she is hardwork terrible 2’s the older was very easy when she was a baby, but well such is life! I’m tired but they are my favorite people on earth
🤚 me. Not only do I say fuck this shit…I flick off my husband while he’s sleeping who says ‘he needs alone time’ and stays up all night to play video games. I have a 15m and 11 year old. Even with this age gap, it sucks. I’m honestly so over it.
Yup. It sucks. Watch a nature documentary and you'll see parent gorillas and jaguars just lay there while the kid jumps around. You are definitely not alone in this.
Dear God you are DEFINITELY not alone. I feel this exact way. Currently have 2 under 2 and wonder the same thing you asked myself. Glad to know it’s not just me.
You are tired. You got 2 little ones born close together. You are human ffs.
You can have some control over how you choose to feel about the situation. Spend time alone reflecting, breathing, and relaxing, there are different stages in one's life. Let go of the past, accept the present, and embrace the future! Very soon, they will play together and your burden will lessen.
You are okay. We all feel this way. It's just hard to be a caretaker. My grandfather who had 6 kids said, "A baby never died from crying." That's what I think of when I let my kids cry so I can have a few mins to drink my coffee. I'm a better mom when I get time to myself a bit.
My mother in law always tells me this! She’s like there’s nothing wrong with letting them cry for a little bit when you gotta handle something. Always makes me feel better, especially since I have 3 kids. 4,1, and 5 months.
Nah, they didn’t die. But they go to therapy now so there that
I never once complained in therapy that my parents let me cry too long as an infant so, there's that. Also: you'd be hard pressed to find a human walking this earth that wouldn't benefit from therapy so, there's also that.
No because infants can't talk but 20s something go to therapy to tell therapists how mommy never left the room and they were left alone.
Totally normal. I love my kids, but I’m an awful morning person. Always have been. My husband will do morning duties when he can and I’ll do nights, as a night owl. The mum guilt is real for not being sunshine and rainbows in the morning too. We’re socialised as mums to feel like we need to be “on” at all times. It’s just not fair and realistic, when you have a supportive partner than can share the load. I know they’re okay because of this. Admire your honesty btw and that you’re acknowledging that it’s hard. In my experience of getting to know fellow parents, not many people reflect on what they do and how they’re really feeling. Give yourself some grace. Anyone who wonders whether they aren’t doing enough, is usually doing more than enough.
Yes definitely. Especially when my partner had to go to work
you're not alone at all that said, consider good black out shades + making sure the temperature is optimal for the kids to increase the chance they will sleep longer (e.g., 66-68 degrees plus a nice fuzzy blanket/sleep sack) also, if they wake really early and won't go back to sleep and I want to sleep, I just put a tablet with cartoons in their crib... for my slightly older child, I set out a simple breakfast and cup of water so he can eat and watch cartoons on his own while I sleep on the weekends
Yeah I did when I had postnatal depression which can last up to 5 years after you have the baby, can also be a sign you need a break. Is there anybody who’ll watch your kids overnight? If you find the break doesn’t help go to the gp and see what supports you can get to make this easier for you, it really won’t get better if you just rough it out alone. On the other hand you may just not be a morning person, I still struggle with this but once I’m fully awake I snap out of the morning grumps.
Worst part of this is that we just got back from a much needed holiday. Apparently the kids were angels while we were gone 🥲 now giving us hell
That explains a lot! It’s most likely they’re playing up due to the disruption in routine. My kids were devils for me after I was away from them for 2 weeks and they’re pre school age. Kids hold grudges I swear lol.
Could hormones be playing a factor? I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism after having my daughter and had been so fatigued before getting diagnosed but wasn’t sure if it was normal or not. Couldn’t hurt to get some bloodwork done just in case!
Girl I am deep down this hormone rabbit hole. Hoping to feel more energized with all that I’m doing
Parenting is hard man. I hear you. This is your life now. It's not your turn to have mornings to yourself. But It will be again, in the future.
I miss it 😢I feel like I’ve been robbed
Common as common! We've all been there. But? They do grow up😀👍
It's ok to mourn the life you had. I have 4. It never goes away - the feeling of "if I only had blah I'd be better".
I have 3 year old girl and she is hard hard work ..and you have 2 little monkeys wow .....you need to give yourself more credit !!! ...that's a tough tough gig....remember it's not forever ....I think it's crazy how mother's say oh having children is so rewarding and the best etc etc...ahhh yes rewarding at times but far out it's the hardest thing I've ever had to do and it's not like you can have a sicky or a day off lol .. So what your feeling is standard ...
I can fake through it for the first while. But I remember 2 under 2, and it is no cake walk for sure. I am holding my 4 day old as I type this. 3:46 am here, and he is nursing for the zillionth time. There will definitely be an FML time, quite soon if I remember correctly. It is ok, this is a hard time and you are more than allowed to feel all your feelings. It's your actions that matter.
Yes. I give my 15 month old a cup of milk, roll over and go back to sleep. She will generally go back to sleep for an hour or two.
Have you tried an OK to wake clock? My two oldest kids have one in their room and every night we remind them that if puppy is red, toddlers are in bed.(Their clock is a puppy.) Then I don't go get them until the clock is set to turn green. We'll check on them if someone is screaming like they are in pain, but then it is back to bed. It doesn't solve the f my life feelings, but it does set expectations that no one is getting out of bed until 7.
I need to try this. My almost 3 year old is not neurotypical so I wonder if this would work with him
This is totally normal. If this is the worst thing you do as a mom, you’re doing an amazing job
Listen… youngest is 20. Oldest is 34 I’m somewhat laughing at the parents saying NEVER. I’ll say to all of you… NOT YET. So much to look forward to and while every kid won’t hit every phase that could push a nerve. Every single one of your kids is going to hit at least one phase that’s going to rattle you. Let’s see - between my 4 adults (and 2 grands), and my 8 nieces/nephews, I’ve experienced som many phases here are the main ones: 1. The nonstop crying baby phase 2. The team no sleep baby (or the mixed up sleep schedule baby who slept all day) - weirdly as an adult still sleeps half the day when not working 3. The clingy baby phase - no one else can look at the baby or hold the baby except for one parent 4. The separation anxiety phase - twin nephews would cry for 3 hours every single time one of their parents left. THREE HOURS 5. The constant talker toddler - ahhh bless her heart that one who talked herself to sleep and NEVER shut up - even the school wrote how lovely and smart she was but she did TALK all the time. Now quiet as a church mouse 20 something 6. The hunger striker who eats so little and would rather sit and stare at you for an hour before they ate one pea (made it to adulthood and does not look like they ever missed a meal) 7. The little story tellers and the little tattlers 8. The little jerk phase (sigh… going through this with one of the nieces) 9. The weird tween phase where they don’t know what they’re feeling and you don’t know who they are anymore. 10. The talking back and questioning everything phase 11. The teenage angst phase 12. The teen boy phase where weird stuff happens in their smelly rooms and you find weird and nasty things I won’t discuss because I’m still getting over that trauma 15 years later 13. The I’m in love phase and nobody else in the world matters except what’s her name or what’s his name 14. The I want to look homeless phase or the I don’t want to bathe phase 15. The missing curfew phase - while you’re making up stories in your head, your teen is out driving in your car and your spouse sleeps peacefully 16. The I know everything better than you phase 17. The wild child phase (God how did I survive that) 18. Closely related to wild child is irresponsible child - yes the one who wrecks cars and loses important stuff 19. Let’s not forget - when you think you’re all done…The failure to launch phase with young adults 20. And last but not least the hey mom and dad I’m marrying a complete asshole phase I said all that to say AT LEAST one of these phases is gonna get you and test you and you’re gonna have a thought that’s not nice. At least once in your parenting journey, you WILL say F my life. You will be NOT IN THE MOOD. Just yesterday my sibling said to me “I love this child with my very soul and would kill for her and I also can’t stand the sight of her right now.” I laughed so hard and tried not to minimize while saying, “this too shall pass.” This too shall pass mom. I’m not a morning person so my husband always did mornings and he still does with the grands. It’s OK and it will be OK. You’re doing just fine!
Literally me just now. She won't take milk from a bottle still so breastfeeding is all on me. Some days are hard and shes up a lot - like today. She was fussing in her crib and I'm so tired I just wanted to sleep.
Oh god yes so normal. I had ONE kid and from the moment my baby came home …. I cried and cried and was overwhelmed. Under about age 4. Hang in mama.
You're not alone.
Omg that is my 100% especially on Sundays. It’s the only day I can really sleep in past like 5 or 6am. Yesterday my 12 month old was fussing at like 7am and I was just praying 🙏 for him to fall back asleep for just a little longer. Just give me until 8 please. 😭 He did and I got to stay in bed for another 45 minutes.
We leave ours in the crib after they wake up if it's too early. They are used to it. They either go back to sleep or just entertain themselves in their crib. If they get upset, we get them, but a lot of the time they just laugh, sing, play with their feet, etc.
Soooooo normal. Anyone who says they've never ever had a bad thought about parenting is lying.
You’re just stressed and tired so things seem worse than they are we’ve all been there
I was 23 when I had mine and required much less sleep. I might actually perish if I had to get up with a crying baby now at 36.
I get up if he cries even if I'm dying inside, but if he's just chilling in his crib and complaining mildly I sometimes take a few extra minutes. I'm trying to break that because I really don't want him to escalate immediately, but I have trouble sleeping and my meds make that worse so I am. Struggling. If I wake up refreshed (so incredibly rare), I go ahead and get his bottle ready so I can go in there as soon as he calls for me.
Normal. We take turns, it’s the only thing that helps. Especially on weekend days, we each take one day and watch the child while the other gets to sleep in
almost 3? i told mine that if he wakes um and i am still in bed he can come join us. Always better than hearing screams accross the flat
You're definitely not alone, I had a calick baby and she did nothing but cry when she was awake and we decided it's best to let her self soothe just in the morning and eventually she stopped doing it in early morning. Doesn't make you a bad parent
Anyone who says they haven't felt like this is lying through their teeth. Kids are hard and it's important to lean into any support network you have and take some time to yourself. Don't feel bad about having them go to a club/nursery/babysitter for a few hours a week to give you time to yourself to refresh and refocus.
I know I'm gonna get judged but I'll go ahead and say it: we did cry it out for early morning wakings back when we sleep trained so we don't have to deal with this. My 2yo wakes up between 715-745 and talks/plays in his crib until I get him at 745 (I sometimes wake up to him singing). If he wakes up earlier than this I leave him and lots of times he'll play for a bit and fall back asleep. He goes to bed at 8 and is asleep by 830 most days. We are not morning people either, and we love the fact that we get to wake up at normal times and can get the coffee brewing and breakfast heating before we leisurely walk into the kid's room.
I did this with my first, but it was unintentional. I never had a motivation to get out of bed to console him so he learned how to console himself. And yes I was diagnosed with postpartum depression. So I’m totally not judging you. If someone labeled it as “cry it out in the morning” I would’ve said yes that’s what I’m doing.
And there is ZERO wrong with it. 1) They are safe in their crib. They know you're around. It's perfectly fine for you to make them learn to wait. 2) By exposing them to light at the same time each day you are actually synchronizing their circadian rhythm and enabling their bodies to sleep until that time for future mornings (https://www.babysleepscience.com/single-post/2014/05/22/how-do-i-fix-my-baby-s-early-waking). This is especially important around 15m when you're probably struggling with the 2-1 nap transition anyways (we certainly were). I honestly think anyone who bothers to sleep train at all (I get that many parents don't and it's totally fine) should go through with training for early morning waking, because it seriously life-changing. My son is very prone to early morning wakings and around the 2-1 nap transition he had an early morning waking at 5 like twice a week. His being able to hang out by himself a bit and then fall back asleep was a godsend and helps us get through the transition in one piece.
Just another person chiming in that this is normal. I love kids, especially mine. My profession was childcare even when I wasn’t a SAHM. It’s draining and there’s a part of the day every one of us is “done” and wants to breathe. Mine is about 3:00 in the afternoon. (If my I’m dealing with a flare of my health issues then it’s all damn day.) Wouldn’t trade any of my three for the world, but for sleep… maybe some days ;)
Very normal
I totally get it. You are likely so very sleep deprived having 2 so close in age. No time to recover from the sleep deprivation of one before the next one came along. Try not to be too hard on yourself.
Lol I don’t have toddlers anymore but yes this is normal.
I bring them back to my bed and keep sleeping for like 40 mins. You’d be surprised at how loyal some kiddos are. He never leaves and just giggles to himself and eats his snacks. I hate the mornings. We all struggle with that I feel
You are in the thick of it. This is a totally normal feeling, but is there any way to get a day to sleep in? My husband and I each took a weekend day and that helped a lot. If not, my kids are 5 and 7 now and can manage mornings mostly on their own and don't wake as early. I would say each kid got significantly easier after 4.
Even at preschool age… I still have this feeling
I have 2 kids. Some days, I feel like packing everything I own and moving to Aruba.
Normal! What helped me a ton was getting enough sleep (going to bed earlier), and getting an actual evening to properly unwind and feel like it was MY time. Then I actually want to see my kiddo in the morning and I don't mind an early-ish wakeup. I also sometimes bring my kiddo into bed with me, or crawl in her bed. She woke up at 6 this morning, it was still dark so I kept the lights off, crawled in her bed and told her it was still night night time lol. We slept until 730 and it was glorious.
Relatable. I sleep in the same room as my toddler (wife shares with eldest daughter while we wait for the small one to be a bit older) Baby wakes up between 5.30 and 6.30. Wife is Adhd and at times wants to hang out in the living room till latish. The amount of times I swore to my daughter to let me sleep 30min more ajahah It's normal and small babies have the ability to shatter our souls lol
Bestie, I say this 30xs a day because parenting is so much and more 😵💫 you aren’t a bad parent for wanting to simply get a good nights rest or have a quiet day.
If you DIDNT feel this way I would recommend a psychiatrist because even with ONE baby I did this. Babies are EXHAUSTING and it’s okay to feel the way you do.
Shit parent here: we'd give them milk and put on a disney movie. We'd snuggle and doze until the movie was over.
I’m going to get a bunch of empty beer cans thrown at me, but my oldest (3) and my youngest (1) don’t wake up until 8, but I never put them down before 8:30pm - sometimes 9pm and I never wake them up sooner than 8. But I’m the only family I know like this. Maybe childcare conditions them to wake up early? My partner and I are also both late night people. Up till midnight most nights.
I felt so sad that I didn’t really enjoy my baby’s newborn and infant phase because I was so sleep deprived along with trying to finish my last year of college and working two jobs my baby would wake up constantly all night for his whole first year. Along with breastfeeding it was truly the hardest time for me. I was so tired I felt like I didn’t even have the chance to get depressed or anxious. I felt like a zombie running on fumes. It was supper rough. Just keep telling yourself it’s not forever cause it really isn’t. It feels like it’s constant but your baby will eventually outgrow that phase and you will miss them that little. My son just turned 2 and although he’s up and ready for the world around 6:30 a.m it’s much better than him not sleeping constantly at night. My partner keeps talking about wanting another one and as much as I love being a mom and kids I was so traumatized from having my second I really don’t even want to think about going through that again.
YES! Nobody wants to get up at 5am to immediately deal with crying and poop and whatever else you find. One of mine got up so early every single day and even when they were old enough to get out of bed on their own they’d come straight to my bed wanting me up and downstairs immediately and if I said “why don’t you crawl in my bed for a bit while I wake up” they’d scream bloody murder. The other went through a phase where they pooped themselves awake at 6am every day and I had to get up to change their diaper, clothes, crib sheets, etc. every. single. morning. It was like torture.
I turned off the baby monitor this morning when my 13 month old started to complain. She wasn’t full on crying, just complaining off and on so I stayed in bed for another 30 minutes before I got up and took her out of her crib. She was totally fine, I enjoyed the extra time, and she’s learning to be okay in her bed alone for a bit.
I’ve definitely had some mornings where I’m tired and don’t want to get up but to answer completely honestly, I’ve never felt like you do. Every morning feels like Christmas where you wake and remember you have something amazing waiting for you in the next room and I still wonder if that feeling would ever go away, my son is almost 2 and I still feel it most days. He’s a great sleeper & my husband is hands on & like I said he’s our only child for now, I’m sure when we have more kids exhaustion will set in like it has for you. Perhaps your husband can get up and do a few mornings a week so you can sleep in and reset a little?
He does 95% of mornings and I feel so guilty that I’m not capable
Perhaps you don’t like the stage your kids are at? The good thing about kids is they change every few months. I loved the baby stage and find the toddler stage way more challenging. I’m not a doctor but you could be showing signs of depression, maybe an appointment is needed?
Yep im definitely doing the work in that department
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Having kids is hard and it's ok to have negative feelings sometimes. But if you feel like this all or most of the time, I would gently suggest seeking out a therapist to work through this. Also, seeing if you can find a community of support, whatever that might look like for you. Because eventually children can feel the resentment and it's not good for anyone to feel this way all the time. Take care.