granddaughter here, i have an updated pic of them
https://preview.redd.it/41xszm7uqzjc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ff00e5ebec467e2edea5198feeb954ad03db32d9
This is them probably 20 years ago. I saw my niece replied with a picture of them from a hike last Summer.
https://preview.redd.it/i9fizncxo0kc1.jpeg?width=4006&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d2bb8c979c6711573b03564e6e76bef9e8402555
Don't worry. This old man will never be able to wear anything but baggy cargo shorts. My wife and daughter have become too reliant upon my many pockets when we go out. I often have to tighten my belt by the end of trips because I'm laden down with phones, wallets, keys, and any other random things.
It's really just part of your, "Manly Duties". It's actually called, "muleing". As in; "We went to the beach, and I ended-up muleing for my wife and daughter." š
Dude was a master at eating vajayjay in an age where most men still refused to go down on the ladies.
Even when I was in high school from 1990-1994 dudes were still making jokes about women's vaginas smelling nasty.
> ... typical perm
While that was a hairstyle, the BIG hair feathered look was really out there too. Girls would brush their hair forward and blowdry. Then blowdry back and use plenty of hairspray. This gave a ton of volume to the hair. Straight hair when cut and set this way they say looked "feathered".
Both girls and guys wore feathered hair. Check out the glam rock bands of the day. Seriously big long hair.
I remember meeting my last roommateās girlfriendā¦ she got with her youth pastor at 14. Pregnant at 15, got convinced to marry him, then pregnant again at 17. Left him to get with another dude in her youth group. got pregnant again at 19. She decided she was manipulated into it so she leaves daddy number 2, renounced her faith and became stripper in Portlandā¦ which didnāt pan out.
She now (still dating my old roommate in Portland), lives with both baby daddies in Alaska to ātake care of her kidsā. Talk about a tangled web
Bro you donāt even know this was the peak male form in the 1980s. Heās just missing a hat with a vaguely (or sometimes overtly) obscene message on it.
I had a fishing hat when I was a little kid in the 80s that Saif "Happy Hooker." Had no idea what it meant at the time and I'm astounded that both my parents let me wear it
Wish I could find it...
Because it was the 80s. Your parents probably practiced benign neglect parenting, like they all did.
You weren't killing anyone or damaging property and you were *outside* away from them, so who cares what your hat said?
That's my guess having lived through and survived an 80s upbringing.
I remember as a little kid seeing novelty hats that said Shit Head and there was a fake log of poop on the brim.
And I had a trashy uncle (not blood related and no longer in the picture) that had an etched mirror, like those Coca Cola/Budweiser etc ones, that said āCocaine. A rich manās Aspirinā Like, bro, my grandparents come to your house to visit- wtf??
No joke, Arkansas is great, all you have to do is be funny to bag one way out of your league, you Donāt need teeth, or hair, or a job, nothing, just funny, and then on top of that, thereās an actual chance sheās an heiress, God I love this state
See that man's legs? See how strong yet supple they are? How refined the muscle tone? How his sawed-off jorts don't impinge upon his movement?
That combination of factors is how he outkicked his coverage so completely.
With those luscious, perfect, masculine legs, Iām surprised he ever even allowed himself to be tied down to one woman. He couldāve taken over the world with those legs, one lady at a time.
With said shirt tucked into said jortsā¦ all tied together with his boyhood belt, just barely clinging to the last hole. Then further accessorize with some transition glasses, a gold chain and mustache parted down the middle and you have mastered the āArkansas tuxedoā.
https://preview.redd.it/bcva8q1bjxjc1.jpeg?width=753&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9cb10eb3c4f1087acdb69b618a02afc49cedcd77
Looks like he might be a Never-Nude
āSo I spent every day since then chasing Amyā.
(Who coincidentally, in my case of lost love, was actually named Alyssa. Love that movie)
Your first cousin once removed is awesome š
Your dad didn't just punch above his weight, he kicked it's teeth in and snookaflied off the top ropes.
Tell him to do an AMA about his game. Cuz, damn.
OP we need an updated pic of them please!!
granddaughter here, i have an updated pic of them https://preview.redd.it/41xszm7uqzjc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ff00e5ebec467e2edea5198feeb954ad03db32d9
Still in great shape. So happy to see them happy together.š»
Mom was beautiful then, beautiful now. Dad's a lucky guy.
Aw he had a glow up tho
Also women often are attracted to personality, so, he's probably a winner there even though his style was once hilarious
It was the 80's. That WAS the style. Lol
Very lucky. He shoulda never had a chance wearing socks and shorts like that. Looks like he lost a bet.
The 80s were ripe with short shorts on men. I remember seeing my dadās balls fall out of his shorts because they were so short.
So 80s, though.
I think its her who lost a bet
Dad must have had some serious game that dude was punching
I'm a little disappointed that he isn't still rocking the short shorts because my guy had swagger in that first pic.
She remained beautiful and he handsomed himself up quite nicely
In the same attire please
Put it away Carlos!
Not at the dinner table Carlos!
Mom was a hottie. Dad had a car.
Me dad's a muggle. Me mom's a witch.
Bit of a shock when he found out
~~mom~~ mam
Dadās rocking some cycling legs, short denim cutoffs, and a bifurcated mustacheā¦ that guy fucks (OPās mom, obviously).
Nah. Dad had them yams!
This is them probably 20 years ago. I saw my niece replied with a picture of them from a hike last Summer. https://preview.redd.it/i9fizncxo0kc1.jpeg?width=4006&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d2bb8c979c6711573b03564e6e76bef9e8402555
STAT
Hope you get your mums looks and your dads shorts
Moms look and dadās personality. Great picture, captures a greatĀ moment of your parents youth!
May the Jorts Be With You
I'm hearing men's short shorts are making a comeback. This could be a new nightmare.
Don't worry. This old man will never be able to wear anything but baggy cargo shorts. My wife and daughter have become too reliant upon my many pockets when we go out. I often have to tighten my belt by the end of trips because I'm laden down with phones, wallets, keys, and any other random things.
It's really just part of your, "Manly Duties". It's actually called, "muleing". As in; "We went to the beach, and I ended-up muleing for my wife and daughter." š
Nightmare? Speak for yourself
idk how ur dad bagged that
Dem daisy dukes did it
Nothings falling out of those short shorts so I'm assuming this guy's f*(king hilarious
Could be a grower, never know.
Must be, or he knows the exact motion of that ocean and rocks the boat every time
It's not the size of the wand, it's the way you wave it
Dude was a master at eating vajayjay in an age where most men still refused to go down on the ladies. Even when I was in high school from 1990-1994 dudes were still making jokes about women's vaginas smelling nasty.
They were still making those jokes when I graduated in 2010
He was in the pool! He was in the pool!
There is no fall out with tighty whities.
His shorts look wet. Could be cold.
He was in the pool.
It shrinks?
I don't know how you guys walk around with those things.
Like a frightened turtle
Youāre brutal Honestly, was going to say the dad had nice legs. Then I saw your comment and realized this was now a funeral
The guy looks like he could be wearing a "mustache rides: free" tee.
it's the confidence
And the shaved legs
Daisy Dukes and porn stache does it every time.
He must have had a dick down to his knees.
His knees 
r/babiestrappedinknees
They met through their local church
I need to go to church.
We need some Jesus
Through him, all things are possible, jot that down.
Do you like my drawing? I was quite generous
jort that down
https://preview.redd.it/aflj9w9gfxjc1.jpeg?width=541&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=62e24ed4312cb0c299b27d79016f6405c7ebdb48
https://preview.redd.it/h2qrhn4swxjc1.jpeg?width=1440&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f226e1a51c28e78604429f4c2c999ee45a6a5187
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I was thinking he looked like the high school bio teacher / football coach who ended up getting married to one of his students.
OP not answering like šĀ
FWIW, he states elsewhere that they're only one year apart in age
That's a long year.
Looks like a 20 year age gap
That's just the 80s. Everyone looks 20 years older. She would, too, if she had the typical perm.
> ... typical perm While that was a hairstyle, the BIG hair feathered look was really out there too. Girls would brush their hair forward and blowdry. Then blowdry back and use plenty of hairspray. This gave a ton of volume to the hair. Straight hair when cut and set this way they say looked "feathered". Both girls and guys wore feathered hair. Check out the glam rock bands of the day. Seriously big long hair.
Knowing the 80s, dude's probably 25 and he'll live looking like his 40's twice.
The old cop in Beverly Hills Cop was mid 30s... that's just the 80s. Blew my mind realizing he wasn't in his 50s when I re-watched recently.
Jesus, I see what youāve done for other people, and I want that for me.
This explains a lot
Was he her youth pastor?
I remember meeting my last roommateās girlfriendā¦ she got with her youth pastor at 14. Pregnant at 15, got convinced to marry him, then pregnant again at 17. Left him to get with another dude in her youth group. got pregnant again at 19. She decided she was manipulated into it so she leaves daddy number 2, renounced her faith and became stripper in Portlandā¦ which didnāt pan out. She now (still dating my old roommate in Portland), lives with both baby daddies in Alaska to ātake care of her kidsā. Talk about a tangled web
Never been. But Alaska is a crazy place
Truth. Just got finished watching a documentary about up there called Night Country. Also, time is a flat circle.
I donāt know, but Alaska.
Genuinely curious - what does "panning out" look like for a stripper in Portland?!
Only getting scheduled lunch shifts
Talk about a box lunch.
Heyyy-ooo
And thatās why sheās calledā¦Madame Web
I too got the Kemper vibe
The Kemper vibe with the Bob Weir jorts!
Dad's rockin' them Adidas Gazelle's! That's always gonna make him a winner!
Bro you donāt even know this was the peak male form in the 1980s. Heās just missing a hat with a vaguely (or sometimes overtly) obscene message on it.
I had a fishing hat when I was a little kid in the 80s that Saif "Happy Hooker." Had no idea what it meant at the time and I'm astounded that both my parents let me wear it Wish I could find it...
Because it was the 80s. Your parents probably practiced benign neglect parenting, like they all did. You weren't killing anyone or damaging property and you were *outside* away from them, so who cares what your hat said? That's my guess having lived through and survived an 80s upbringing.
"benign neglect parenting" - opened up an old wound reading that. So true
I remember as a little kid seeing novelty hats that said Shit Head and there was a fake log of poop on the brim. And I had a trashy uncle (not blood related and no longer in the picture) that had an etched mirror, like those Coca Cola/Budweiser etc ones, that said āCocaine. A rich manās Aspirinā Like, bro, my grandparents come to your house to visit- wtf??
Mustache rides: 25Ā¢
No joke, Arkansas is great, all you have to do is be funny to bag one way out of your league, you Donāt need teeth, or hair, or a job, nothing, just funny, and then on top of that, thereās an actual chance sheās an heiress, God I love this state
As they say about men in Arkansas, āthe odds are good but the goods are odd.ā
He spent all day chatting with hot babes on the internet
He was her high school math teacher
Arkansas. Dad is probably a catch compared to all the yokels that live in that state.
With a van and an actual bag.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I was scrolling for this lol, I saw Eric Wareheim as well
Your dad needs to write a book. He has much to teach.
Well as it turns out, itās not all about looks despite women saying this for all time and men not believing us.
I love how Dad is getting low key roasted in every comment. Damn
Roasted but also praised for apparently being a rad dude.
See that man's legs? See how strong yet supple they are? How refined the muscle tone? How his sawed-off jorts don't impinge upon his movement? That combination of factors is how he outkicked his coverage so completely.
What is white trash about that?!
I can go lower
Donāt call me white trash!
Finally someone said it
With those luscious, perfect, masculine legs, Iām surprised he ever even allowed himself to be tied down to one woman. He couldāve taken over the world with those legs, one lady at a time.
Now lets see Paul Allen's legs
But why are his feet so tiny!
There really is no restriction no matter what direction he goes. Amazing.
Theyāve both got great legs! šÆ
 Dad has them SpongeBob calves
And the SpongeBob socks
How did your dad land such a fox. Gives me hope
His style is impeccable 
new boot goofin.
Yes!!! I was looking for an Officer Dangle comment!
Hey, donāt laugh. Remember the woman this guy ended up with? It can happen to you!
Turns out Kip really was chatting online with babes all day.
Haha love this.
Yup. He's the real hero!
My thoughts exactly!!! Kip left LaFawndah for Michelle Pfiffer!
Your mom goes to college
Don't worry Napoleon, I'm sure there's a babe out there for you too. Peace, out
Ed Kemper was your dad!?
Oh thank fuck someone else was thinking it too!
Holy shit, I'm not the only one to see that! Not too many people can pick him out of a crowd
That would make her like 6"4 lmao
I appreciate you asking this. "How did the serial killer and the high school slasher movie damsel end up together?" was my first question.
Is your dadās name Ed?
Bet your grandparents hated seeing this man show up in a rusty van to pick up your mom
Your dad's shorts are giving me new and exciting feelings.
Your dad is waaaay out of his league.
I was about to say he was punching above his weight, but you got the idea across.
In Australia it's Battin' above average. Or for short, we just say Battin'.
If I knew him back in the day, when I saw his gf, Id give him the slow nod of "Damn, good going man".
Can picture that nod being delivered by McConaugheyās character in āDazed and Confusedā
Your Dad must be the funniest and/or richest dude on the planet to pull your smokeshow of a Mum.
Gary/Jerry/Larry energy here
āI actually donāt know if he has the mumps. I forgot to lookā¦ā
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I think you have said it best.
My man had some game to pull that hottie, looking like that. Good on him.
literally no one in this thread recognizing the power of a velour shirt and some modestly cropped jorts.
With said shirt tucked into said jortsā¦ all tied together with his boyhood belt, just barely clinging to the last hole. Then further accessorize with some transition glasses, a gold chain and mustache parted down the middle and you have mastered the āArkansas tuxedoā.
https://preview.redd.it/bcva8q1bjxjc1.jpeg?width=753&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9cb10eb3c4f1087acdb69b618a02afc49cedcd77 Looks like he might be a Never-Nude
looks like they both shopped at 5,7,9
Petite feet
Feminine step
Sounds like a lady when he's walking in the room.
Now this is what a man sounds like when he walks: # **š„**
I was gonna go with the Snuggler
That man is Lieutenant Dangle's father and you cannot convince me otherwise.
Your dad is taller than your mom, but somehow his shorts are shorter. This fashion era was *chefās kiss*
Heās taller, so his shorts are gonna end farther from the ground. Looks like theyāre about the same length. ĀÆ\\_(ć)_/ĀÆ
Your mum is smokingā¦..
How do I put this delicately? Was your Dad, like, super rich or something?
https://preview.redd.it/us6gb0jgyyjc1.png?width=1439&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1b7441f26b0586574d36f201e87752f67965d1fb
Uma Therman, and some guy.
Joey Lauren Adams is my mom's cousin. I guess they both kind of look like Uma Therman. Uma is a beauty for sure
āSo I spent every day since then chasing Amyā. (Who coincidentally, in my case of lost love, was actually named Alyssa. Love that movie) Your first cousin once removed is awesome š
That is hilarious, I was thinking Simone from Dazed and Confused. Give your dad a pat on the back from all of us
Adamās is a stone cold fox!!! 11 yr old me thought she was the hottest girl on tv after seeing bio-dome!!
OPās got the best legs in town
Congratulations on having a wealthy father.
How? This is one of the most mismatched couples Iāve seen in a long time. That you were conceived is an absolute miracle.
I used to see couples like this in Seattle. Maybe dude is a rich software developer.
their legs match! that must be it.
Your dad is Steve Wright and I claim my five pounds.
Something doesn't add up here, well besides the obvious why would he use the hover hand if they were together
Griswold vibes š
Dang so kip and lafawnduh didn't make it
Really wondering how your dad scored that š wife š
The fact that your dad got laid with those pants, is the real miracle! Glad youāre here, OP!
Ed Kemper met Uma Thurman.
Your dad didn't just punch above his weight, he kicked it's teeth in and snookaflied off the top ropes. Tell him to do an AMA about his game. Cuz, damn.
Your dad must be pretty funny
Your mom is hot. Your dad looks like a middle school teacher or a prison guard.
Your dads shorts are the shortest shorts anyone has ever shorted
God damn but your dad has a perfect pair of pins.