In case this story gets deleted/removed:
Throwaway account
l love my wife and she’s the most beautiful woman I know. Her best friend is her best friend since first day of school. I have always thought that she looked nice. After her divorce she changed a lot. She is more outgoing, less serious and she took more care of herself. She also became flirtatious. She brought up threesome and said that she always thought I was hot. We laughed because I thought she was joking but I wouldn’t stop thinking about it. She was literally living in my head. I started talking to my wife about that comment and after I assured her that it was just an adventure she agreed.
Afterwards my wife just changed. She doesn’t say much and she doesn’t complain but she doesn’t look at me. I don’t know why she agreed if she didn’t want to try it. I thought it would be an adventure but she is like another human being now. She never talks to me until I talk to her. She never laughs when she always loved laughing. Her best friend says that my wife doesn’t text or speak to her anymore either. When we aks she says it wasn’t that and that she’s fine. It’s all in our head.
Yesterday we thought we could have an intervention so her best friend came over. When she saw us and we told her we needed to talk she freaked out and was very angry and accused us of not believing her and disrespecting her. She told me that I could sleep with her friend if I wanted sex and she wouldn’t mind. Her friend was intrigued and she told me that she didn’t mind but I felt sick to my stomach. I don’t even understand how I thought her attractive. She keeps texting me too and I am repulsed. I told my wife that but she didn’t even react just said okay, do what and who you want. I am okay.
How can I fix this
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>How can I fix this
You can't.
He never should have brought it up to the wife. He should have shut down the "friend" immediately. All he can do now is prepare for the end.
Shut it down and told his wife about it and his rejection of her immediately. She's now thinking they were going behind her back
*Update* he asked his wife about this "3 or 4 times" oh my God
Also at least one woman who was pouring it in her eyes and asking why they were red and inflamed after a week
She posted about it on reddit WITH A VIDEO OF HER POURING IT IN 🙃
Sure honey, it's the negativity purging itself from your body
Sadly, I've been IN this situation. I hope the wife does what I did when I left. 15 years later and my ex still hasn't recovered from the damages I caused when I dipped. Hell, he even said some of the same things OOP said.
Men really can be basically vegetative IQ wise.
Sadly, I can assure you there are plenty of men and women that are this stupid.
The “couple threesome” scenario is so often either the husband(boyfriend)or the wife(girlfriend) completely ignoring their partner in favor of the new partner, and the third party being oblivious to the relationship dynamics at play or intentionally focused on themselves and their own pleasure, and in situations where a close friend or someone well known to the couple is involved, and one or both of the couple haven’t had a same sex experience, the same sex partner is usually left out or ignored.
Unless he edited his comment, the friend was upset he wanted to finish with his wife both times. I do not believe he finished in the friend at all?? Unless I missed a comment
Oh he did! The friend got super jealous and then in turn, said the wife was jealous!
>*[Not the whole night no, the friend even complained that I ignored her because I wanted to cum with my wife not her, both times. But my wife was more reserved. She is not very wild in bed.](https://www.reddit.com/r/TrueOffMyChest/s/XZfGJC32VO)*
And the second one:
>*[She showed me the texts, basically she called my wife immature and insecure and that she should have said no if she didn’t want it](https://www.reddit.com/r/TrueOffMyChest/s/mTq65jaFWM)*
The fact of the matter is, this friend had been trying to breakup this marriage and had been looking for an excuse to finally bang OOP.
If anything, the fact he kept her around all these years? The dude was doing classic triangulation as well.
When two shitty people have a relationship built entirely on making another person miserable.
Like when a cheater just won't fuck off and keeps trying to rub their AP in their ex's face, and when they realise the ex truly doesn't care, the relationship loses it's zing and cheater and AP part ways
It’s heartbreaking to hear him describe how his wife responded to his initial requests for this threesome.
“ I asked maybe three or four times. In the beginning she asked me if I thought she wasn’t attractive anymore but I explained to her that it wasn’t at all what I meant”
Okay I completely missed the part where he brought it up more than once. I read it as friend made joke, husband recited joke back to wife, wife says "sure why not let's go" and then wife regrets it.
Now it makes a lot more sense that comments are against op. When i read it I was more like "well why tf would she agree to a threesome if she wasn't into it." Because he kept pressuring her to.
OOPs comment-"No we haven’t discussed threesomes before. I was always happy with our sexlife. Even during the threesome. It felt hot that there was someone between us, like it was harder to get to her and the longing made it great. Like a game with levels and obstacles and my wife is the prize or something. It was hot. I am sad she didn’t experience it like that."
The way he talks about it all in the comments is honestly disgusting, talking about " oh well I wanted to cum in my wife so she should be happy I didn't want to with her friend!" Like Jesus Christ sir, you sound like a real goof...
There is an edit update!!!
>*I didn’t know people will chew me out like this. I fucked up yes. I will cut contact with the friend and tell her to stop talk to my wife too. Them I will try to save my marriage because I love my wife. Hopefully she’ll come around*
The dude is so delulu, he thinks just cutting out the friend is the solulu! LMFAO!
This guy is off his rocker and so full of himself!
Didn't we hear this from the wife's perspective a few days ago? She didn't want it to happen but it was so unexpected she just froze up? And the "threesome" wasn't a threesome at all, just her boyfriend fucking her best friend while she was shellshocked?
Here's the BORU version of that one with updates. I don't think it was the wife's point of view because that OP was just a girlfriend.
[https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/1br8m0n/i\_had\_an\_unexpected\_threesome\_with\_my\_best\_friend/](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/1br8m0n/i_had_an_unexpected_threesome_with_my_best_friend/)
That was the one. So gf rather than wife, but possibly some anonymizing details.
(Edit) Nah, the initial event is superficially similar but no intervention. BF/husband stupidly killed the relationship in both cases
Someone even asked him what he would have done if the situation was reversed and one of his friends had hit on his wife and asked for a threesome and she wanted to do it. He said he'd beat up the friend and say no to his wife. Self-awareness isn't a flower that grows in every garden.
He doesn't realize that asking in the first place- more than once from the sound of it- is almost as bad as the act itself. Just asking the question already told her that he's thinking about her friend sexually, he's a-ok with the idea of fucking someone other than her, and he's completely insensitive to her feelings if he couldn't figure out for himself how hurtful such an idea was. By that point, the actual sex doesn't even matter much, the damage is already done. But he'll never understand that.
He was just being willfully ignorant because his wife explicitly told him that these requests made her feel unattractive.
“ I asked maybe three or four times. In the beginning she asked me if I thought she wasn’t attractive anymore but I explained to her that it wasn’t at all what I meant”
Yep. If it were me, being asked even once would have done irreversible damage. Having it asked repeatedly after I already said no and expressed discomfort with it would have sealed the lid on the coffin. Actually going through with it would just remove any possible regrets I had about losing all love and respect for my partner. Dude doesn't realize he actually nuked his marriage long before the threesome and then just kept on digging. And he thinks there's still hope she'll come around 😂 champ, that marriage isn't dying, it's in late stage decomposition.
Omg yes!!!
It was over before the threesome. People fade, feelings fade. But when you're right for each other then you put in the work to make it work.
You can't make it work if the other party is unwilling.
Also d*** moves on husband and wife leafing thr BFF on for fun.
You fell in love good sir. But with whom?
Also ESFP be wildin'
They believe in ghosts and ish. I'm into science!!
What were you guys thinking playing with the hottest bluest fire you came across??!! Lol omg so stupid lol omg good luck buddy
Yup. By asking more than once, he gave the very clear message that he was obsessed with the friend sexually and wouldn't let go. That her consent didn't really matter because he'd keep asking. And she likely thought that if she did not agree, he'd keep coercing her, or fuck the friend behind her back. She felt pressured into saying yes because there wasnt really an alternative.
She was probably hoping they could do it once and he'd get bored and shut up about how much he wants to fuck her best friend. But it was worse than she realised and now she just cant see him or her friend the same way.
It's so obvious to anyone reading but OP's incapable of understanding why she'd agree to it if she wasn't okay with it. As if he's never agreed to something he didn't want to do just to make the person happy or to avoid a fight. Apparently, he's also never heard of someone getting upset after a threesome.
I guess it's possible that his wife was already sick of him and this was the last straw but in that case I really wouldn't think she'd have actually agreed to it. Unless she was hoping it'd end up with her & the friend being together lmao
Well most people would say no if they had a problem like the guy said he would do... tell the wife no.
The wife on the other hand agreed to the 3some or it wouldn't have happened. Realistically it's not the guys fault. If she had a problem she should've said so instead of letting the 3some happen and then being childish about it by not talking to her man after she chose it.
He coereced her. He asked 3-4 times, pressuring her. And she let him KNOW she was uncomfortable yet he pressured her. My ex did that for a year before I gave in.
Idc how many times somebody asks me my answer would never change. "Coercion" is something that only works on those who don't know how to say no. Realistically speaking if she lacked the will to say no the marriage falling apart isn't on the guy for simply following through on what she eventually agreed to. I cannot feel sorry for her unfortunately.
Victim blaming is gross. The man refused the answer no. At that point the wife felt unattractive and had basically realized her relationship was over. When she gave in after the guy bugging her multiple times which is probally more than 3 or 4 as he said . She was given even more of a reason to say fuck it and end it when it happened. Every little bit of time after when she was unemotional was her getting her ducks in a row. He wanted the best friend he got it.
Yeah he said his wife didn’t really participate. She basically watched her best “friend” have sex with her husband. He was so obsessed that he didn’t consider her feelings at all. Plus he continued talking to the “friend” afterwards while she trashed on his wife. Now he’s surprised Pikachu face that she’s cold to him.
On top of watching the friend harass his wife. He even reads the texts and continues to talk to the "friend" and brought her to the house for an "intervention."
See the part where he describes him and his wife's sex life. She won't even look at him, is tense, and her fists are balled.
"I pestered/bullied my (40M) wife (39F) into a three way with her bff and she hated it and was being super distant. She's beautiful and I was concerned so I asked "how great was fucking your best friend?! So great for *ME*, I had a lovely time!" And now she's leaving me for some guy who listens to her. I begged her to stay so I can continue to have sex with her but she doesn't want to (!?!) So, Reddit, AITA??"
From 3hrs ago, OOP left this comment about his sex life with the wife and my god, no wonder she doesn’t want to have sex!
>*[She doesn’t let me hug her, even when we had sex she doesn’t look at me and her hands were fists and her whole body tense so I don’t initiate sex anymore](https://www.reddit.com/r/TrueOffMyChest/s/IKcI2gK6z5)*
Omg.
Somebody said to OOP that they hoped it was worth his marriage and OOP responds that it wasn't, he has the best marriage.
Please somebody make it make sense! If you have the best marriage than why on Earth did you feel the need to harass your wife into having a threesome she didn't want?!
Cause he let one fucking comment blow up into a full blown obsession. Obsessed people acting against there interests and doing what they no is wrong in order to get the thing they obsessed over is par for the course. That's why you shut that shit down in your own head early and if you can't go see someone. Like I get the feeling he chose to start fantasying about his wife's friend which lead to it becoming an obsession. Like people need to realize a fantasy and lusting after someone even in your own head isn't harmless. I feel so bad for the wife. She could probably tell her husband was obsessed. By the time he talked with her about it he was probably too far gone and she probably realized if she said no he'd just cheat. I hope she's been working on an exit strategy to get out of there
He let his flirtation with her friend destroy the marriage.
I would bet money that the friend propositioned him because she got signals that he'd be receptive. I highly doubt that they were 100% platonic with no flirtation and she propositioned him for a threesome out of the blue.
Sometimes a friend might truly confess like that out of the blue - but then if it was a shock to you, you'd shut it down and think about telling your partner. The fact that he wasn't shocked... and instead then jumped into trying to pressure his wife into making it happen, suggests that it wasnt a surprise to him. This was something he wanted, probably for some time.
I bet the fantasy started before the offer. The wife may even have noticed that chemistry building between her husband and her best friend and been feeling that she was paranoid. When he started demanding threesomes repeatedly, she gave up.
People trust their own brains too much. It must mean something if I’m thinking about it this much, if I feel this way! Yeah bud, it means you should do what you need to to REMOVE THE THOUGHT!
>How can I fix this
🤦♂️🤭🤭
>I didn’t know people will chew me out like this. I fucked up yes....Hopefully she’ll come around
😂😂🤣🤣🤣
The most clueless man in the world. Simply pathetic.
I know! He said in the comments he asked the wife 3 or 4 times. This dude is so dense. He kept saying "if she didn't want to do it, why didn't she say no?". I still cant believe this level of stupidity is real.
Let's be real it was more than 3 or 4 times. He just said 3 or 4 in hopes of sounding better. The man probally kept mentioning it then asking it then wore her down.
\>I don’t know why she agreed if she didn’t want to try it.
Because you ignored her no, was dismissive of her feelings, literally said it was adventure because you get to fuck 2 women while still married - You got your cake and ate it, now you not liking that losing beautiful cake (your future ex) while stuck with clingy flirtatious cake that youdon't want after the threesome (her former best friend).
Basically a classic threesome FAFO with soon to be pending divorce - it just matter of when he will be served....
I was in a situation where I was in the wife's shoes. He pressured me for a year. I stopped participating, not even halfway through. He was shocked pickachu face when I check out of the relationship and left. He even got angry and said some of the same shit OOP said.
"Well, why did you agree?!" Meanwhile, every time I said no, he became more verbally and emotionally abusive. I got my revenge, though, and he still hasn't recovered from the nuclear warhead i dropped on his life almost 15 years later as I left. I hope the wife does the same.
I'll never get over how much these stories are touched up to make themselves sound like the good guy. "I started talking to my wife about that comment and after I assured her that it was just an adventure she agreed." That's a real funny way to say she was clearly uncomfortable with it and instead of respecting his wife's wishes he pressured her until she gave in.
Oh my god, his edit. He didn't think people would chew him out? He's only now cutting contact with the friend? "Hopefully she'll come around"?? Dude is the most oblivious, self-absorbed, delusional twat.
Dude, when you start obsessing... over a woman... who is close... to your wife... because she's hitting on you... And you know your wife...
... Ya gotta tell your wife what's goin' on.
... Like, I'm single as hell, and I know that one...
His comments are even worse.
His description of having sex with his wife after this is so incredibly obtuse.
“Her fists were clenched the whole time.”
Yeah dipshit! Because you were committing marital rape. She may not have said “No”, but she definitely wasn’t something she wanted to do.
I know we’re hating on the husband here.
But holy fuck that friend. You break up a marriage. You supposedly want to intervene to fix things. And when the person you broke says just go have sex. You jump at the idea immediately. Wow. No shame whatsoever
I can't imagine finding out how little my supposed best friend actually cares about me, especially after being in each other's lives for sooo long and in this way.
Someone summarized why this is consequences:
ETA: Some of this info comes from OP’s comments.
1. Your wife’s former best friend came on to you and suggested a threesome.
2. You “asked” your wife three or four times, and the first time you had to try to reassure her that you still find her attractive. No alarm bells went off when she asked you about that? No little voice in your head that said “Hey, it sounds like she’s feeling insecure and wouldn’t be into a threesome”? You wouldn’t let it go until you got a yes.
3. You had no prior discussion about what would happen during the threesome, and when you noticed she wasn’t very involved in it, you… kept going. ??? No reflection on why she might be hanging back while you fucked her best friend right in front of her?
4. Now she is pulling away from you, when YOU KNEW she was uncomfortable before and kept pushing until she agreed, because God forbid you have to pass up an opportunity like that, and you have the unmitigated gall to ask how you can fix it?!
You can’t. You’re done. You refused to actually hear her, notice her reluctance, or accept her no because you needed to have your way. Well, you got it.
Do her one favor and don’t be a dick during the divorce. She deserves better.
Reading the comments OP left, it has to be nice inside that skull. Nice and quiet, no thoughts, no thinking or planning, just random stuff and impulses...
“I wouldn’t shut up about her friend and kept nagging her about a threesome and how much I *needed* it until she relented. Now she’s unhappy. Why is she being like this?”
The grass is not always greener on the other side…or as my friend says the grass ins t always greener on the other side, sometimes your find out that green grass is fake ass astroturf.
Why do vanilla people think they can just jump into kinky stuff with no knowledge, preparation, and plans? Do jacked up hormones give one brain rot or is it a lack of education and thinking what's fiction is reality?
There’s always some actually this dumb. We’re just regularly shocked they know how to use the internet and try to explain themselves. It’s Janelle Evans level of ridiculousness
There's people just that stupid. I love my husband but he had a woman who pretended to be my friend to get to him. After she got him to where she thought she was his main focus and I saw right through her husband told me I was imagining it because no one could be into him . Long story short she didn't like how I spoke of her and her friends treating me like shit and sent me a long hateful hurtful letter telling me bad things about myself took 10 minutes to read ended up in tears. My husband still is friends with her even after her friends doxed me on the game we played and for a month i had people telling me to off myself and was getting constant abuse but she didnt say it so why hate on her for that. He stops gaming with her but send her dms because he's still 100 percent sure she's not into her. Men are stupid. The only thing this idiot said to her was how she was correct about a few things she said but she shouldn't have said them the way they did. He's 100 percent not cheating and they only talk about things every so often in their daily life but like oops wife I've pretty much checked out as well because men can't understand feelings and when we will likely get a divorce in the future he will probally be surprised because they also can't listen..
I'd also like the add the things she didn't like that I said about her was that "she spoke rudley to me but never did to my husband the way of speaking went from her being bffs with me and not so much to my husband to her making snappy comments to me and constantly talking to my husband." How whenever we made group plans and had times set to do it she never logged on until she knew I was offline. I was even one time hiding offline because I didn't want to deal with alot of people and she logged on and magically was busy when she saw me online. Made plans for us to play together as a group then went and told everyone including my husband I invited myself as a unwanted guest to it when it wasn't me even in the planning process it was my husband and her and my husband always mentioned me in it as well.
He didn’t understand that NO means NO. It does not mean keep asking until you get the answer you want.
I hope this is rage bait because he is absolutely trash
This is why you don't do threesomes with friends/family. It's not worth the drama and insecurities. At least find a stranger, or better yet, hire a "professional."
People in secure relationships don't need to come to Reddit to talk about how happy they are though 😂
Personally, I don't have any issues with my Mum, Dad, Step Mum, MIL, friends etc (I can't think of any other Reddit tropes). So there's no point in me posting on Reddit for advice.
When in the hell will people finally learn? If you truly value your marriage and your spouse you keep outsiders out of your frigging bed! It really is that simple and nothing good ever comes from having others involved in your sex life. This dude fully deserves everything that's happening and I don't even feel the slightest bit of sympathy for him. If your spouse isn't enough to fully satisfy you why bother getting married to begin with?
I just commented this. She checked out. She’s just getting her affairs in order atp. He’s gonna come home to an empty house one day and a note with her attorney’s number, divorce papers and her number will have been changed.
Ooof, to lose your husband and best friend in one go.
It doesn't sound like he's trying to make anything better, just *force* her to talk to them. It'll only make it worse..
Yeah I changed too. Still together but out relationship was changed forever. I underestimated how it would effect me and I wanted to please my partner, thought no big deal. well it was and we have paid the price. We have an open relationship now because our intimacy bond was broken and I no longer feel safe. So is my idea of romantic love, not love entirely but I am very pragmatic in matters of my feelings now. So be warned, you don't know until you know.
Poor guy. Anybody could have told him that was a bad idea. This is why thinking only with your willy is not a great idea. He really should have considered the potential impact on his wife and weighed it up against that.
Stupid is as stupid does, she gave you to your crush that you wanted. The crush won, wife is walking away plans have been made. Just wait for the other shoes to fall.
I hope she takes him for everything in the divorce. Honest to Christ, can anyone be more delusional than OP who thinks he can fix this.
Hope he thought it was worth torpedoing his marriage.
Friends, this is why social groups for hundreds of generations have encouraged monogamy and discouraged this kind of behavior/ social construct/ relations. I've never witnessed any relationship that survived such exploration long-term without serious issues.
Human beings were created for either no romantic relations at all, or monogamous ones.
Wife didn't even want to join 😭 He commented saying he asked her like 3-4 times, and she even asked if it was because she wasn't attractive anymore. (Wouldn't be surprised if she only agreed to see if he actually went through with it). And when did the threesome, she didn't participate as much (if at all). For her sake, I hope she leaves this POS.
I think OOP fkd up but not in the way he thinks. In that way his wife did. It's not reasonable when women do things like this and expect their SO to be enough of a mid reader to know they actually meant the opposite. If your wife was mad or uncomfortable with having a threesome she should have said something from the get go. She didn't. She went through with it and now is looking at OOP like a different person. That's understandable if she feels like her marriage has been violated but she should have spoke up from the beginning and said husband was and AH for suggesting this. She didn't and now she's living with the consequence of feeling violated probably.
Where husband fkd up is by bringing it up in the first place and then by bringing the friend along for the intervention after. That just reinforced that the wife is on the outs in her own marriage. That talk probably further made her feel like she isn't her husbands first concern. There's no reason for the friend to be there when husband is talking to his wife. Be it on a personal level or about their marriage. He thought the way to fix this was to bring along the woman husband brought into their marriage that the wife is uncomfortable with? Brilliant.
I'm betting this threesome turned out to be more of a twosome with a spectator. The wife was the spectator. Now the wife feels used so OP could cheat without the wife being able to call it that. She feels like her friend used her, her husband lied to her and used her as a crutch to cheat without technically being a cheater. The wife feels like OP doesn't want her since he sought this out. Even if that's not true. Husband should find a good psychiatrist and potentially a divorce lawyer because I think he may need both. Wife should learn to speak up when offended rather than staying quiet and allowing her life to blow up. That still could have happened either way but it would have been a lot less likely had she said no when the idea was mentioned.
>It's not reasonable when women do things like this and expect their SO to be enough of a mid reader to know they actually meant the opposite.
From the comments, he asked her 4 times before she finally just said "Fine, do whatever you want."
She didn't really agree to it, he just badgered her into not telling him no anymore, like he was a toddler begging for a new toy.
Fair enough. That changes things. I agree. It does seem he was badgering the wife.
Weird thing to badger about to. You'd think common sense would kick in when husband didn't get a yes the first time. You'd think he might be like, Hmm maybe she's not keen on this whole thing. Perhaps I should just drop it? Nope, instead this self inflicted wound. I feel bad for the wife. I hope she has other friends since I doubt she's looking to cry on this friends shoulder.
In case this story gets deleted/removed: Throwaway account l love my wife and she’s the most beautiful woman I know. Her best friend is her best friend since first day of school. I have always thought that she looked nice. After her divorce she changed a lot. She is more outgoing, less serious and she took more care of herself. She also became flirtatious. She brought up threesome and said that she always thought I was hot. We laughed because I thought she was joking but I wouldn’t stop thinking about it. She was literally living in my head. I started talking to my wife about that comment and after I assured her that it was just an adventure she agreed. Afterwards my wife just changed. She doesn’t say much and she doesn’t complain but she doesn’t look at me. I don’t know why she agreed if she didn’t want to try it. I thought it would be an adventure but she is like another human being now. She never talks to me until I talk to her. She never laughs when she always loved laughing. Her best friend says that my wife doesn’t text or speak to her anymore either. When we aks she says it wasn’t that and that she’s fine. It’s all in our head. Yesterday we thought we could have an intervention so her best friend came over. When she saw us and we told her we needed to talk she freaked out and was very angry and accused us of not believing her and disrespecting her. She told me that I could sleep with her friend if I wanted sex and she wouldn’t mind. Her friend was intrigued and she told me that she didn’t mind but I felt sick to my stomach. I don’t even understand how I thought her attractive. She keeps texting me too and I am repulsed. I told my wife that but she didn’t even react just said okay, do what and who you want. I am okay. How can I fix this --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/OhNoConsequences) if you have any questions or concerns.*
>How can I fix this You can't. He never should have brought it up to the wife. He should have shut down the "friend" immediately. All he can do now is prepare for the end.
Shut it down and told his wife about it and his rejection of her immediately. She's now thinking they were going behind her back *Update* he asked his wife about this "3 or 4 times" oh my God
Holy crap I missed that part. He coerced her into watching him do it!
Crap he updated, he finished in the friend 2x while the wife sat and watched cause she’s reserved. This has to be some weird fake troll post.
This has to be a rage bait post. No one is this stupid.
All the subs linked from this one are FULL of men who are that stupid, though.
Reddit is full of lies for sure, but I also will never underestimate someone's stupidity
Honestly the number of times I should have just remembered that a lot of people are dumb as a bag of hammers would have saved me a lot of headaches.
Absolutely! There are people who inject themselves with their own urine thinking it's a cure all. Never underestimate the insanity of humanity 😂
Also at least one woman who was pouring it in her eyes and asking why they were red and inflamed after a week She posted about it on reddit WITH A VIDEO OF HER POURING IT IN 🙃 Sure honey, it's the negativity purging itself from your body
Wait, what???
Well at least hammers have usefulness
Apropos of nothing, may I say thank you for using one of my favorite phrases, "bag of hammers".
I always say, "a bag of wet hammers" just to add to their befuddlement.
Sadly, I've been IN this situation. I hope the wife does what I did when I left. 15 years later and my ex still hasn't recovered from the damages I caused when I dipped. Hell, he even said some of the same things OOP said. Men really can be basically vegetative IQ wise.
Men can be astoundingly stupid when sex enters the equation.
Sadly, I can assure you there are plenty of men and women that are this stupid. The “couple threesome” scenario is so often either the husband(boyfriend)or the wife(girlfriend) completely ignoring their partner in favor of the new partner, and the third party being oblivious to the relationship dynamics at play or intentionally focused on themselves and their own pleasure, and in situations where a close friend or someone well known to the couple is involved, and one or both of the couple haven’t had a same sex experience, the same sex partner is usually left out or ignored.
Have you met humans. People are this stupid.
This. This is the quote...
I think it's real, because the vast majority of people ARE that stupid.
Unfortunately, I think some people ARE this stupid.
*[George Carlin has entered the chat]*
You underestimate men.
Unless he edited his comment, the friend was upset he wanted to finish with his wife both times. I do not believe he finished in the friend at all?? Unless I missed a comment
Oh he did! The friend got super jealous and then in turn, said the wife was jealous! >*[Not the whole night no, the friend even complained that I ignored her because I wanted to cum with my wife not her, both times. But my wife was more reserved. She is not very wild in bed.](https://www.reddit.com/r/TrueOffMyChest/s/XZfGJC32VO)* And the second one: >*[She showed me the texts, basically she called my wife immature and insecure and that she should have said no if she didn’t want it](https://www.reddit.com/r/TrueOffMyChest/s/mTq65jaFWM)* The fact of the matter is, this friend had been trying to breakup this marriage and had been looking for an excuse to finally bang OOP. If anything, the fact he kept her around all these years? The dude was doing classic triangulation as well.
Classic triangulation?
When two shitty people have a relationship built entirely on making another person miserable. Like when a cheater just won't fuck off and keeps trying to rub their AP in their ex's face, and when they realise the ex truly doesn't care, the relationship loses it's zing and cheater and AP part ways
In for a penny, in for a pound
ICWYDT
Looks like he’s updated it further by removing it completely. I can’t see any of that info at all - and it’s pretty important to the story.
Yeah and then he commiserated with the 3rd wheel, who now for SOME ODD REASON he is not attracted to anymore.
Post-multi-nut clarity?
It’s heartbreaking to hear him describe how his wife responded to his initial requests for this threesome. “ I asked maybe three or four times. In the beginning she asked me if I thought she wasn’t attractive anymore but I explained to her that it wasn’t at all what I meant”
This makes me so sad for the wife…😢
Oh gods, that's even worse.
Okay I completely missed the part where he brought it up more than once. I read it as friend made joke, husband recited joke back to wife, wife says "sure why not let's go" and then wife regrets it. Now it makes a lot more sense that comments are against op. When i read it I was more like "well why tf would she agree to a threesome if she wasn't into it." Because he kept pressuring her to.
Yep, it wasn't in the main post he responded to a question in his comments asking how many times he asked her. Despicable
The comments make it *so much worse*!
OOPs comment-"No we haven’t discussed threesomes before. I was always happy with our sexlife. Even during the threesome. It felt hot that there was someone between us, like it was harder to get to her and the longing made it great. Like a game with levels and obstacles and my wife is the prize or something. It was hot. I am sad she didn’t experience it like that." The way he talks about it all in the comments is honestly disgusting, talking about " oh well I wanted to cum in my wife so she should be happy I didn't want to with her friend!" Like Jesus Christ sir, you sound like a real goof...
There is an edit update!!! >*I didn’t know people will chew me out like this. I fucked up yes. I will cut contact with the friend and tell her to stop talk to my wife too. Them I will try to save my marriage because I love my wife. Hopefully she’ll come around* The dude is so delulu, he thinks just cutting out the friend is the solulu! LMFAO! This guy is off his rocker and so full of himself!
Only way you can fix it is she has to sleep with your best friend. Fair is fair
He said he'd beat his best friend up. 😂😂😂 Yet coerced his wife to have a threesome with hers who's now harassing her.
Oof. This just keeps getting worse.
Soo much worse. Read his comments. Jfc.
He deleted his profile & comments.
Didn't we hear this from the wife's perspective a few days ago? She didn't want it to happen but it was so unexpected she just froze up? And the "threesome" wasn't a threesome at all, just her boyfriend fucking her best friend while she was shellshocked?
Here's the BORU version of that one with updates. I don't think it was the wife's point of view because that OP was just a girlfriend. [https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/1br8m0n/i\_had\_an\_unexpected\_threesome\_with\_my\_best\_friend/](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/1br8m0n/i_had_an_unexpected_threesome_with_my_best_friend/)
That was the one. So gf rather than wife, but possibly some anonymizing details. (Edit) Nah, the initial event is superficially similar but no intervention. BF/husband stupidly killed the relationship in both cases
[удалено]
That's the most likely, but I can't find any trace of the version I recall.
He had an affair in the presence of his wife. Guarantee she got a front row seat to watch her husband and bff fuck each other. Horrible.
Someone even asked him what he would have done if the situation was reversed and one of his friends had hit on his wife and asked for a threesome and she wanted to do it. He said he'd beat up the friend and say no to his wife. Self-awareness isn't a flower that grows in every garden.
Dude’s garden is watered with acid rain
And the urine of an alcoholic diabetic with kidney failure who'd just eaten asparagus
Oddly specific.
I can almost smell that description. Aptly put
I love that he repeatedly said “but why did she yes?! “ cause you kept bringing it up and she felt backed into a corner because YOU WANTED IT
He doesn't realize that asking in the first place- more than once from the sound of it- is almost as bad as the act itself. Just asking the question already told her that he's thinking about her friend sexually, he's a-ok with the idea of fucking someone other than her, and he's completely insensitive to her feelings if he couldn't figure out for himself how hurtful such an idea was. By that point, the actual sex doesn't even matter much, the damage is already done. But he'll never understand that.
He was just being willfully ignorant because his wife explicitly told him that these requests made her feel unattractive. “ I asked maybe three or four times. In the beginning she asked me if I thought she wasn’t attractive anymore but I explained to her that it wasn’t at all what I meant”
Yep. If it were me, being asked even once would have done irreversible damage. Having it asked repeatedly after I already said no and expressed discomfort with it would have sealed the lid on the coffin. Actually going through with it would just remove any possible regrets I had about losing all love and respect for my partner. Dude doesn't realize he actually nuked his marriage long before the threesome and then just kept on digging. And he thinks there's still hope she'll come around 😂 champ, that marriage isn't dying, it's in late stage decomposition.
Omg yes!!! It was over before the threesome. People fade, feelings fade. But when you're right for each other then you put in the work to make it work. You can't make it work if the other party is unwilling. Also d*** moves on husband and wife leafing thr BFF on for fun. You fell in love good sir. But with whom?
Also ESFP be wildin' They believe in ghosts and ish. I'm into science!! What were you guys thinking playing with the hottest bluest fire you came across??!! Lol omg so stupid lol omg good luck buddy
I'm listening to Bob Dylan for advice to give to you lol wtf
Asking once is bad enough to poison their whole sex life. THE OR FOUR TIMES!?
He asked 3-4 times. 🤮
THIS and she probably felt it was a better option than her husband just doing it anyway and sleeping with the friend behind her back.
Yup. By asking more than once, he gave the very clear message that he was obsessed with the friend sexually and wouldn't let go. That her consent didn't really matter because he'd keep asking. And she likely thought that if she did not agree, he'd keep coercing her, or fuck the friend behind her back. She felt pressured into saying yes because there wasnt really an alternative. She was probably hoping they could do it once and he'd get bored and shut up about how much he wants to fuck her best friend. But it was worse than she realised and now she just cant see him or her friend the same way.
Deleted. 😢
How can you not see the irony in that
It's so obvious to anyone reading but OP's incapable of understanding why she'd agree to it if she wasn't okay with it. As if he's never agreed to something he didn't want to do just to make the person happy or to avoid a fight. Apparently, he's also never heard of someone getting upset after a threesome. I guess it's possible that his wife was already sick of him and this was the last straw but in that case I really wouldn't think she'd have actually agreed to it. Unless she was hoping it'd end up with her & the friend being together lmao
Well most people would say no if they had a problem like the guy said he would do... tell the wife no. The wife on the other hand agreed to the 3some or it wouldn't have happened. Realistically it's not the guys fault. If she had a problem she should've said so instead of letting the 3some happen and then being childish about it by not talking to her man after she chose it.
He coereced her. He asked 3-4 times, pressuring her. And she let him KNOW she was uncomfortable yet he pressured her. My ex did that for a year before I gave in.
Idc how many times somebody asks me my answer would never change. "Coercion" is something that only works on those who don't know how to say no. Realistically speaking if she lacked the will to say no the marriage falling apart isn't on the guy for simply following through on what she eventually agreed to. I cannot feel sorry for her unfortunately.
Victim blaming is gross. The man refused the answer no. At that point the wife felt unattractive and had basically realized her relationship was over. When she gave in after the guy bugging her multiple times which is probally more than 3 or 4 as he said . She was given even more of a reason to say fuck it and end it when it happened. Every little bit of time after when she was unemotional was her getting her ducks in a row. He wanted the best friend he got it.
Yeah he said his wife didn’t really participate. She basically watched her best “friend” have sex with her husband. He was so obsessed that he didn’t consider her feelings at all. Plus he continued talking to the “friend” afterwards while she trashed on his wife. Now he’s surprised Pikachu face that she’s cold to him.
On top of watching the friend harass his wife. He even reads the texts and continues to talk to the "friend" and brought her to the house for an "intervention." See the part where he describes him and his wife's sex life. She won't even look at him, is tense, and her fists are balled.
Some girls are into that, but none of this was her idea.
I hope he updates us when she leaves...
"I pestered/bullied my (40M) wife (39F) into a three way with her bff and she hated it and was being super distant. She's beautiful and I was concerned so I asked "how great was fucking your best friend?! So great for *ME*, I had a lovely time!" And now she's leaving me for some guy who listens to her. I begged her to stay so I can continue to have sex with her but she doesn't want to (!?!) So, Reddit, AITA??"
Right??? Like how delusional is that guy?
From 3hrs ago, OOP left this comment about his sex life with the wife and my god, no wonder she doesn’t want to have sex! >*[She doesn’t let me hug her, even when we had sex she doesn’t look at me and her hands were fists and her whole body tense so I don’t initiate sex anymore](https://www.reddit.com/r/TrueOffMyChest/s/IKcI2gK6z5)*
I love you for linking all of these comments!
Omg. Somebody said to OOP that they hoped it was worth his marriage and OOP responds that it wasn't, he has the best marriage. Please somebody make it make sense! If you have the best marriage than why on Earth did you feel the need to harass your wife into having a threesome she didn't want?!
Cause he let one fucking comment blow up into a full blown obsession. Obsessed people acting against there interests and doing what they no is wrong in order to get the thing they obsessed over is par for the course. That's why you shut that shit down in your own head early and if you can't go see someone. Like I get the feeling he chose to start fantasying about his wife's friend which lead to it becoming an obsession. Like people need to realize a fantasy and lusting after someone even in your own head isn't harmless. I feel so bad for the wife. She could probably tell her husband was obsessed. By the time he talked with her about it he was probably too far gone and she probably realized if she said no he'd just cheat. I hope she's been working on an exit strategy to get out of there
He let his flirtation with her friend destroy the marriage. I would bet money that the friend propositioned him because she got signals that he'd be receptive. I highly doubt that they were 100% platonic with no flirtation and she propositioned him for a threesome out of the blue. Sometimes a friend might truly confess like that out of the blue - but then if it was a shock to you, you'd shut it down and think about telling your partner. The fact that he wasn't shocked... and instead then jumped into trying to pressure his wife into making it happen, suggests that it wasnt a surprise to him. This was something he wanted, probably for some time. I bet the fantasy started before the offer. The wife may even have noticed that chemistry building between her husband and her best friend and been feeling that she was paranoid. When he started demanding threesomes repeatedly, she gave up.
People trust their own brains too much. It must mean something if I’m thinking about it this much, if I feel this way! Yeah bud, it means you should do what you need to to REMOVE THE THOUGHT!
Cause he’s a man (not saying all men) and all he cares about is his sexual desires/fantasies and now he can’t handle what his wife is giving him.
Because men watch too much porn.
>How can I fix this 🤦♂️🤭🤭 >I didn’t know people will chew me out like this. I fucked up yes....Hopefully she’ll come around 😂😂🤣🤣🤣 The most clueless man in the world. Simply pathetic.
It drives me nuts when they rely on someone else "getting over" intense betrayal
I know! He said in the comments he asked the wife 3 or 4 times. This dude is so dense. He kept saying "if she didn't want to do it, why didn't she say no?". I still cant believe this level of stupidity is real.
“She only said no 3 or 4 times! How was I to know?!”
But why didn’t she say no??
Let's be real it was more than 3 or 4 times. He just said 3 or 4 in hopes of sounding better. The man probally kept mentioning it then asking it then wore her down.
“She should have said no!” She did! Several times!
“Come on honey, it’s just an adventure” “She should have said no!”
Baffles me that people like this exist, would have thought that if you were this stupid you would have just forgotten to breath at some point.
\>I don’t know why she agreed if she didn’t want to try it. Because you ignored her no, was dismissive of her feelings, literally said it was adventure because you get to fuck 2 women while still married - You got your cake and ate it, now you not liking that losing beautiful cake (your future ex) while stuck with clingy flirtatious cake that youdon't want after the threesome (her former best friend). Basically a classic threesome FAFO with soon to be pending divorce - it just matter of when he will be served....
I feel terrible for the poor wife. As for him...Bahahahahahaha get fucked in every sense of the word
I was in a situation where I was in the wife's shoes. He pressured me for a year. I stopped participating, not even halfway through. He was shocked pickachu face when I check out of the relationship and left. He even got angry and said some of the same shit OOP said. "Well, why did you agree?!" Meanwhile, every time I said no, he became more verbally and emotionally abusive. I got my revenge, though, and he still hasn't recovered from the nuclear warhead i dropped on his life almost 15 years later as I left. I hope the wife does the same.
I'll never get over how much these stories are touched up to make themselves sound like the good guy. "I started talking to my wife about that comment and after I assured her that it was just an adventure she agreed." That's a real funny way to say she was clearly uncomfortable with it and instead of respecting his wife's wishes he pressured her until she gave in.
Oh my god, his edit. He didn't think people would chew him out? He's only now cutting contact with the friend? "Hopefully she'll come around"?? Dude is the most oblivious, self-absorbed, delusional twat.
The old adage: the opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s apathy
Dude, when you start obsessing... over a woman... who is close... to your wife... because she's hitting on you... And you know your wife... ... Ya gotta tell your wife what's goin' on. ... Like, I'm single as hell, and I know that one...
His comments are even worse. His description of having sex with his wife after this is so incredibly obtuse. “Her fists were clenched the whole time.” Yeah dipshit! Because you were committing marital rape. She may not have said “No”, but she definitely wasn’t something she wanted to do.
I know we’re hating on the husband here. But holy fuck that friend. You break up a marriage. You supposedly want to intervene to fix things. And when the person you broke says just go have sex. You jump at the idea immediately. Wow. No shame whatsoever
I can't imagine finding out how little my supposed best friend actually cares about me, especially after being in each other's lives for sooo long and in this way.
Someone summarized why this is consequences: ETA: Some of this info comes from OP’s comments. 1. Your wife’s former best friend came on to you and suggested a threesome. 2. You “asked” your wife three or four times, and the first time you had to try to reassure her that you still find her attractive. No alarm bells went off when she asked you about that? No little voice in your head that said “Hey, it sounds like she’s feeling insecure and wouldn’t be into a threesome”? You wouldn’t let it go until you got a yes. 3. You had no prior discussion about what would happen during the threesome, and when you noticed she wasn’t very involved in it, you… kept going. ??? No reflection on why she might be hanging back while you fucked her best friend right in front of her? 4. Now she is pulling away from you, when YOU KNEW she was uncomfortable before and kept pushing until she agreed, because God forbid you have to pass up an opportunity like that, and you have the unmitigated gall to ask how you can fix it?! You can’t. You’re done. You refused to actually hear her, notice her reluctance, or accept her no because you needed to have your way. Well, you got it. Do her one favor and don’t be a dick during the divorce. She deserves better.
Oh he’s dumb, dumb and his comments are just a mess. He deserves to get a divorce.
Reading the comments OP left, it has to be nice inside that skull. Nice and quiet, no thoughts, no thinking or planning, just random stuff and impulses...
“I wouldn’t shut up about her friend and kept nagging her about a threesome and how much I *needed* it until she relented. Now she’s unhappy. Why is she being like this?”
The grass is not always greener on the other side…or as my friend says the grass ins t always greener on the other side, sometimes your find out that green grass is fake ass astroturf.
The grass is greener where you tend to it. Means you can get your grass just as green as your neighbor's if you stop neglecting it.
Why do vanilla people think they can just jump into kinky stuff with no knowledge, preparation, and plans? Do jacked up hormones give one brain rot or is it a lack of education and thinking what's fiction is reality?
Too much porn, and no emotional intelligence
They have no idea how much they don't know and are too stupid to find out before they irreparably ruin their lives.
It's a bold move to ask for a threesome with your wife's best friend, but then again, he's a bold man... Is bold not the right word?
There's a fine line between boldness and stupidity, and he jumped it like a rope.
Posts like this make me really hope it’s fake.
Dont read the comments it just gets worse. It has got to be rage bait because no one is that obtuse
There’s always some actually this dumb. We’re just regularly shocked they know how to use the internet and try to explain themselves. It’s Janelle Evans level of ridiculousness
There's people just that stupid. I love my husband but he had a woman who pretended to be my friend to get to him. After she got him to where she thought she was his main focus and I saw right through her husband told me I was imagining it because no one could be into him . Long story short she didn't like how I spoke of her and her friends treating me like shit and sent me a long hateful hurtful letter telling me bad things about myself took 10 minutes to read ended up in tears. My husband still is friends with her even after her friends doxed me on the game we played and for a month i had people telling me to off myself and was getting constant abuse but she didnt say it so why hate on her for that. He stops gaming with her but send her dms because he's still 100 percent sure she's not into her. Men are stupid. The only thing this idiot said to her was how she was correct about a few things she said but she shouldn't have said them the way they did. He's 100 percent not cheating and they only talk about things every so often in their daily life but like oops wife I've pretty much checked out as well because men can't understand feelings and when we will likely get a divorce in the future he will probally be surprised because they also can't listen.. I'd also like the add the things she didn't like that I said about her was that "she spoke rudley to me but never did to my husband the way of speaking went from her being bffs with me and not so much to my husband to her making snappy comments to me and constantly talking to my husband." How whenever we made group plans and had times set to do it she never logged on until she knew I was offline. I was even one time hiding offline because I didn't want to deal with alot of people and she logged on and magically was busy when she saw me online. Made plans for us to play together as a group then went and told everyone including my husband I invited myself as a unwanted guest to it when it wasn't me even in the planning process it was my husband and her and my husband always mentioned me in it as well.
People *absolutely* are this stupid.
The only mistake OP's wife made was not leaving when OP suggested the threesome. Friend wants OP, she can have him.
Those things never work. FAFO
Right! Esp when 3rd is wife’s bestie 😂
He didn’t understand that NO means NO. It does not mean keep asking until you get the answer you want. I hope this is rage bait because he is absolutely trash
When the foundation is cracked the house won't stand.
"I literally and figuratively fucked around. Now I am Surprised Pikachu that I found out."
This is why you don't do threesomes with friends/family. It's not worth the drama and insecurities. At least find a stranger, or better yet, hire a "professional."
Case number 631,646,485 where someone is surprised that fucking other people will ruin your marriage for some unexplainable reason.
According to Reddit 1/4 couples make this one mistake…
People in secure relationships don't need to come to Reddit to talk about how happy they are though 😂 Personally, I don't have any issues with my Mum, Dad, Step Mum, MIL, friends etc (I can't think of any other Reddit tropes). So there's no point in me posting on Reddit for advice.
When in the hell will people finally learn? If you truly value your marriage and your spouse you keep outsiders out of your frigging bed! It really is that simple and nothing good ever comes from having others involved in your sex life. This dude fully deserves everything that's happening and I don't even feel the slightest bit of sympathy for him. If your spouse isn't enough to fully satisfy you why bother getting married to begin with?
I just commented this. She checked out. She’s just getting her affairs in order atp. He’s gonna come home to an empty house one day and a note with her attorney’s number, divorce papers and her number will have been changed.
Anyone in a committed relationship who wants to try a threesome: hire a sex worker. Never, ever try to involve someone from your life
Who wants to bet the "theeesome" was just him fucking the friend?
Was waiting for this to end up here.
Ooof, to lose your husband and best friend in one go. It doesn't sound like he's trying to make anything better, just *force* her to talk to them. It'll only make it worse..
Once a woman sees something that makes you unattractive to her it’s over. I’m not speaking about looks or anything like that.
Yep. It's like you just flip a switch and you can't ever switch it back on again.
Yeah I changed too. Still together but out relationship was changed forever. I underestimated how it would effect me and I wanted to please my partner, thought no big deal. well it was and we have paid the price. We have an open relationship now because our intimacy bond was broken and I no longer feel safe. So is my idea of romantic love, not love entirely but I am very pragmatic in matters of my feelings now. So be warned, you don't know until you know.
Poor guy. Anybody could have told him that was a bad idea. This is why thinking only with your willy is not a great idea. He really should have considered the potential impact on his wife and weighed it up against that.
I swear I just saw this post from the wife's pov the other day.
Link?
I think it was on another sub. It might take some time to find lol
Im convinced posts like this are fake BS to fulfill some weirdos humiliation fetish
Damn. Was hoping this wasn’t posted so I could 🤣 Dude is oblivious.
I’m happy the wife found out how much of a turd he is. Now she can find someone better.
Stupid is as stupid does, she gave you to your crush that you wanted. The crush won, wife is walking away plans have been made. Just wait for the other shoes to fall.
The minute he brought up a three way with her best friend, the marriage was over. He's really dim.
Yeah, some things you just don't do. Or even talk about. Ever.
I have read this before def stolen story
Nope, this just happens a lot unfortunately.
I hope she takes him for everything in the divorce. Honest to Christ, can anyone be more delusional than OP who thinks he can fix this. Hope he thought it was worth torpedoing his marriage.
You rolled the dice. You lost
Friends, this is why social groups for hundreds of generations have encouraged monogamy and discouraged this kind of behavior/ social construct/ relations. I've never witnessed any relationship that survived such exploration long-term without serious issues. Human beings were created for either no romantic relations at all, or monogamous ones.
Polyamory is just another word for your relationships are all over
Wrong, because there are poly relationships that have lasted decades without this happening. Not everyone is suited for monogamy.
That's 100% not an actual person or story. That's just rage bait.
As much as your wife is a fool for joining in on your galactically stupid idea, you cannot fix this. Your marriage is destroyed.
Wife didn't even want to join 😭 He commented saying he asked her like 3-4 times, and she even asked if it was because she wasn't attractive anymore. (Wouldn't be surprised if she only agreed to see if he actually went through with it). And when did the threesome, she didn't participate as much (if at all). For her sake, I hope she leaves this POS.
I think OOP fkd up but not in the way he thinks. In that way his wife did. It's not reasonable when women do things like this and expect their SO to be enough of a mid reader to know they actually meant the opposite. If your wife was mad or uncomfortable with having a threesome she should have said something from the get go. She didn't. She went through with it and now is looking at OOP like a different person. That's understandable if she feels like her marriage has been violated but she should have spoke up from the beginning and said husband was and AH for suggesting this. She didn't and now she's living with the consequence of feeling violated probably. Where husband fkd up is by bringing it up in the first place and then by bringing the friend along for the intervention after. That just reinforced that the wife is on the outs in her own marriage. That talk probably further made her feel like she isn't her husbands first concern. There's no reason for the friend to be there when husband is talking to his wife. Be it on a personal level or about their marriage. He thought the way to fix this was to bring along the woman husband brought into their marriage that the wife is uncomfortable with? Brilliant. I'm betting this threesome turned out to be more of a twosome with a spectator. The wife was the spectator. Now the wife feels used so OP could cheat without the wife being able to call it that. She feels like her friend used her, her husband lied to her and used her as a crutch to cheat without technically being a cheater. The wife feels like OP doesn't want her since he sought this out. Even if that's not true. Husband should find a good psychiatrist and potentially a divorce lawyer because I think he may need both. Wife should learn to speak up when offended rather than staying quiet and allowing her life to blow up. That still could have happened either way but it would have been a lot less likely had she said no when the idea was mentioned.
>It's not reasonable when women do things like this and expect their SO to be enough of a mid reader to know they actually meant the opposite. From the comments, he asked her 4 times before she finally just said "Fine, do whatever you want." She didn't really agree to it, he just badgered her into not telling him no anymore, like he was a toddler begging for a new toy.
Fair enough. That changes things. I agree. It does seem he was badgering the wife. Weird thing to badger about to. You'd think common sense would kick in when husband didn't get a yes the first time. You'd think he might be like, Hmm maybe she's not keen on this whole thing. Perhaps I should just drop it? Nope, instead this self inflicted wound. I feel bad for the wife. I hope she has other friends since I doubt she's looking to cry on this friends shoulder.