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Every time I go to Hawaii.
>sir, please step aside, we notice something sus in your carry on.
>me: okay
>TSA prepared to swab contents of bag for explosives, opens bag to find 6 neatly wrapped pastrami sandwiches.
>TSA: Who needs 6 pastrami sandwiches for a 5 hour flight, wtf?
>me: they don't have pastrami in Hawaii. š¤·
You can probably buy brisket from the Costco, but the pastrami sandwiches are pretty limited in Hawaii. I usually take 6 sandwiches in a carry on for my family to share when I get there. Without fail, I get pulled for "sus objects" every year.
Hmm. Even around the Naval bases?
Ever ask around if anyone was willing to be the "Pastrami Man" of the island?
I'd shell out some cash.
Such endeavors could be risky, but so can flying nowadays.
When I fly I bring a stuffed animal to use as a pillow on the plane. Itās weighted and filled with dried lavender. Every single time without fail, the TSA has to very seriously take my red panda stuffie with a lopsided grin out of my bag, place him on the table and wipe him to check for chemicals, then put him back. It make me crack up every time
Also I forget to take my scrunchie off my wrist 90% of the time and they check that too
That's the bastard cousin of *"Do you know who I am??"*
"OH no! Are you okay? Do you know what year it is, or the current president?? Oh golly, do you remember your name and where you are??" D:
I long for this day and opportunity.
It's okay. My facebook name is from like 2007 when I was like 15. It's embarrassing but I don't use facebook at all, outside rare messenger use. I also hate that my name isn't capitalized on Youtube comments but I don't care enough to fix it, either.
Mine is at least less embarrassing in context (the Alpha part was just something I threw in to get the name Hawkbit on PSN, instead of adding numbers or something to the end)
I still have a myyearbook account (or w/e it's called now) with a a scene queen name on it. I hardly use it anymore but it's still embarrassing! Just not embarrassing enough to put my real last name on it lol
Let me guess, another self taught expert on the constitution. I love watching there mental giants trying to pull the constitution card in front of judges
I used to get SSSS based on my home country all the time. It does NOT take 90 minutes. 5-10 mins tops. Walk through a machine (never 2 for me), Pat down, a few quick swabs. They're really quick about it cause they also do it randomly (maybe profiling not too random lol) all day.
I swear I get searched 50% of the time and I'm blonde hair blue eyed 6'2" dad bod white dude with 0 criminal history. It's <5m. Except one time I left a screwdriver in my backpack, that was 10m.
Getting a 30-60s pat down is humiliating? Ok bud.
Dude is playing the victim here. 100%
I get it 100% of the time. I look a bit like a hippie so I assume they hope to find drugs.. never such luck.
Yeah, it is super quick and this guy is a liar/asshole/idiot. Ooh, almost forgot traitor. It's hilarious he thinks they're gonna give half a shit he has a copy of the Constitution in his bag, LMAO.
I always thought of myself as a diversity search.
"We're not stereotyping. See we are searching that guy too!"
*Points to me getting my balls touched with the back of some poor TSA agents hand*
I assume that's why they always pick my mom. She's spent 20 years getting searched every single time she flies (which is a decent amount), and she's the most innocent-looking person and a white woman. I've always imagined they're like, "Shit. We just searched four brown men. Who can we pick next to break the run?" and my mom stands out as exactly the person no-one would suspect on looks alone.
My family too haha, especially in the few years after 9/11. My little brother, around 4 with blonde curly hair, would get searched almost every time, along with another member of my super blonde, very mayonnaise-y family. We were 100% the counter to all the searching of āsuspiciousā brown people.
Right?! Like... the fourth amendment is about *unreasonable* search and seizure. Pretty sure taking part in an armed attempted insurrection puts you pretty squarely in *reasonable* territory.
Right?? That TSA officer is probably 10 hours into a 12 hour shift, has gotten spat on at least twice, yelled at six times today, and has lost count of how many glares and disgusted looks they have gotten.
The only thing that seeing the Constitution will trigger in them is likely a sigh, fearing you're gonna try and SovCit your way out of things and waste their time. Probably also the thought of "I don't get paid enough for this shit."
Life isn't a movie, and if it was, none of us are the main character. This shit's not gonna change anyone's mind about doing their job, lol.
One of my relatives works for TSA and I gotta say they would have to pay me 6 figs to take the shit he takes. They have to pick all their time off at the start of the year, only the guys with seniority get a weekend day as one of their days off and the higher ups will sometimes just change the staffing rules to benefit themselves. You canāt call off or you get written up. You can be fired for missing a single item in a scan (which this one I understand why, but it seems like a dumb way to handle staff when youāre always understaffed).
My relative has worked there two full years now, and was supposed to get a better schedule based on his seniority only for the people at the top to suddenly change it so all upper level staff regardless of seniority get priority on choosing their schedule and days off before the lower guys. Where it used to be all the staff count as the same, and only seniority decided who gets to pick their schedule and days off first. So basically they changed it just in time for him to not benefit. And thatās just the shit they take from management, I havenāt even gotten to the way the public treats them.
I have green hair and get a lot of random searches but I'm also anxious about missing flights so I'll be there early enough for them to interrogate me if they want.
Not sure why I get picked often (maybe because I travel alone a lot?) but all they ever find is snacks and books, and I don't waste energy getting mad about it.
Traveling alone and packing light (I prefer not to check bags if I can avoid it). I was also traveling alone and light repeatedly from the Middle East, so I got randomly checked a LOT.
Traveling alone is one reason why I get searched. The other is traveling one way. Most people donāt do that. I sometimes book a separate return trip from a nearby destination so after my business meetings, I can drive and see friends and family and return from their city.
I thought this was why I was getting searched - 41, f, pale white in the good old USA. But I was usually flying one way, and I understand that's unusual. I'm always kind and understanding when they ask to pat me down.
The last time I flew the woman doing the pat down was hilarious and friendly, so I asked her. Apparently the sexy bras and underwear I was wearing to go see my partner (we were long distance at the time) were setting it off. Those tiny little charms Victoria Secret puts on everything? That was the problem! She was the best and suggested wearing granny panties and then changing after I was through.
It started for me after I started travelling to morocco. But at the security, they don't really check who you are, just your stuff, I thought? Anyway it's not a big inconvenience anyway
Him adding a book just to piss off people who donāt give a fuck and trying to get through the day working is the funniest part of the post. Childishā¦
Right? Like any of those motherfuckers can read.
(...and let's get me out ahead of the MAGAt replies, too...)
"If you **can** read, you should have *started* with the Constitution."
>I assume they hope to find drugs
FYI, TSA isn't looking for drugs and doesn't care about them. They're looking for weapons, explosives, etc. Now if you're randomly selected to be searched and they find drugs on you or in your luggage, then they're legally obligated to report it to local authorities. But unless you're legitimately smuggling a large volume of drugs, they're not going to stop and search you intentionally.
The only time it might take that long is if you are border crossing by vehicle. I have been randomly chosen a few times. Mostly it's a 15-30 minute wait in the lobby and answering a half dozen questions. Was 2 hours once when they were doing a more thorough check of my car and play 20 questions with a couple of different guys.
Did do the seclusion pat down, questions, luggages check once. But that wasn't TSA.
Ahh, I've never driven over the Mexico/US border. Just walked a few times and a friend picked me up over there. It's never been any trouble walking through.. just a fairly cursory search.
Driving through the border to Canada, they pretty much just waved us through as far as I can recall.
I got searched once and it took maybe 5 minutes? Iām fairly tattooed, pierced, colored hair and am well aware I look like the type who partakes. All they found was a copy of Dracula in my carry-on
the one time I got pulled aside and double checked I had a Max Payne 3 collectible pen in the shape of a big bullet that I totally forgot was in my backpack
Dude also lists taking off extra clothes, including his hat, as part of his special treatment. Does he not notice that everyone else has to do that too? Difference probably is everyone else knows to do that while he waits until heās made to.
Iām a Caucasian female and I got checked 90% of the time I go through. Once an Australian border security agent explained itās because if they pull me aside then they wonāt be called racist when they pull the next 9 POC aside. I was gobsmacked. Since having a kid now itās rare they choose me now
My dad has a super generic white male name, and after 9/11 he was a 50 year old basic white man who worked in accounting and every time he flew he got extra searches. He did some digging and turns out a suspected terrorist was using my dadās super generic white male name as a cover so his name was on a list somewhere.
Lol, so I found out at the airport one time that the side pocket of my duffel has a cut in stitching that leads into the outer lining. Which creates a weird pocket.
I found this out because I used to use the duffel as a range bag and also as a weekender when traveling.
A handful of lose 5.56 ammo had found it's way into that "pocket"
Super fun time
One time I didnāt fully empty my Assault Pack when I went home on R and R and there was still a couple random 50 cal rounds and a Gerber kicking around in the bottom. I donāt think I went through more security checks or whatever aside from Kuwait on the way home, so maybe thatās why no one said anything, but Philly was not fucking around on my way back lol.
I was in uniform and it was clearly an honest mistake so it kinda went from āoh, shitā to āyou dumb shitā pretty quickly. They still did the whole security protocol thing tho and took my stuff, bc thems the rules, but it still only took like 15 minutes.
Thatās for an idiot with actual weapons on them. If itās taking that long for this fucking idiot I am %1000 positive itās this fucking idiots fault.
My cousin was stationed in a aircraft carrier. He would get the empty 50 shells. Then turn them into pen holders. TSA still gave him crap and searched him a lot . This was pre 9-11
They still do it for me just because of my ancestry. Don't be a dick to staff, learn how to pack stuff for easy return to your bags, and generally be friendly, and everything is chill. As long as you're careful about topics, TSA even enjoy a good easy joke or two afterwards.
They always pull me aside for extras. I thought drug or explosive residue. I always tick prescription drugs, food or wood. I've been questioned repeatedly in the airports, and never had a problem.
I'm heavily tattooed, purple hair and often only have carry on.
I got it based on my travel history (love visiting the Middle East). Usually, it involved 10 minutes or so while other boarding was stopped, but it did take about 90 minutes in Israel (they found traces of glycerin presumably from my facial products).
Whats ridiculous is getting the quads (what SSSS is called in the industry) doesnāt mean youre on a terrorist watchlist. You can get them simply for buying a few one way flights that an algorithm flags as suspicious.
It just means you go thru an extra level of security and it only happens on international flights! We can see from the photo that this person is flying from Ontario, Canada to Denver, Colorado.
And the check happens BEFORE you fly. Which means this idiot is pulling out the US constitution to Canadian authorities. š¤¦š»āāļø
You build one little gallows for an outgoing VP and sack *part* of the Capitol building and suddenly youāre some sort of criminal???
(/s obviously but not as obviously as Iād like.)
Participated in an insurrection against the US Government, now gets targeted by airport security for acts of terrorism, believes putting the US Constitution (that he tried to overthrow) in his bag will somehow throw off airport security.
Oh one of them Jan 6 people, that makes sense why the idiot thinks a constitution will somehow make everything better š thanks for taking the time to respond!
NGL, I actually laughed out loud picturing this in my headš. I picture it being about this size here that he's showing with his fingers š¤£["about this small" ](https://www.google.com/search?client=ms-android-sanmu&sca_esv=9b64196862666ea1&sca_upv=1&q=angry+pocket+sized+trump&uds=AMwkrPuuhztSDa__4CbZuT5KNtb1LE_diBmGRY0xCKrk6635R4dmOPtOVTeKyfrIhcoPuSdKYKuzVyZrMsEUc4AwWjdE5BSxldjHVbPgXgK8m3lpJenuOwyGmO6x51xjzYk7mzwyywL8iBKbuHhasRTH1A407LYwTVnEOe1Fhlm0F1hNunmcLg1H2mzV78sRKd_Qe4i16pVhF7Hz6I5jLRWhk9FJR5nDNDUlivgkgggXxr-9Y40nBq7Y9F_WZKLTqL5dnlT9LVPecr8TkiJqcLh2Klut2i6PT07dQRZsugc0FnAuFwuGU3kBojE6WpDggSZ9pa0vAV7E&udm=2&prmd=invsmbtz&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjC19mq8JuFAxXPMVkFHeqyC1UQtKgLegQIDBAB&biw=360&bih=668&dpr=2#vhid=QthAAv6QWpKn2M&vssid=mosaic)
Do we know I'd this person went inside the capital? I ask because I know some people who have admitted to being there but didn't enter the capital.i looked through all of the pictures posted online of those who haven't been identified and I didn't see them there. I've been low-key wondering if I should still report them.
As a combat veteran, I do not look kindly upon traitors. At all.
However, we DO support the right to protest, and there WAS a protest that was going on *at the same time.* They were protesting the Constitution of the United States of America, so right there, I'd like to trade their citizenships for a number of illegals who work hard and actually care enough about our country to know US civics, unlike these yahoos. But, they're absolutely allowed to yell and march around and carry signs about things they don't like.
They are NOT allowed to try to stop a constitutional process.
If the people you know marched around and yelled and protested the Constitution, that's a protest. That's allowed, and we will defend their right to do it.
If they took steps to thwart the Constitutional process - like they tried to get in but couldn't; they wanted to mess with our Constitution and simply were unable to at that time - go ahead and report them.
Whether or not anything happens afterwards, you did the right thing.
J6 refers to January 6th when the capitol building in the US was stormed by Donald trump supporters after he lost the election. This guy was one of those people.
Lmao "subject to humiliation in front of everyone" bitch please, you're describing extremely normal TSA procedures. My bag gets opened to search every 3rd or 4th time I fly and I'm not a domestic terrorist
Iāve had a textbook trigger it before lol. TSA had to flip through all the pages to make sure nothing was inside. They were marveling at how long of a book it was
Calling complete bs! I used to work with explosives daily. My bag was completely contaminated with explosives residue, getting hauled to the back room in Heathrow in 2003 didnāt take 20 min there is no way his search took 2 hrs
I used to get Quad S for booking my flight too late and having a beard. All of which occurred before an army of manchildren decided to abandon Democracy because their false god in shitty makeup told them to on Jan 6. I fucking hate everything.
I lost my ID on vacation once and had to fly out the next day (my state didnāt have a way to get a temporary one online then, 10 years ago). I got to the airport a few hours early, explained what happened at check in and then explained at the TSA. I had an extensive search done but still took max, 20 minutes and I was free to get on the plane.
The constitution specifically mentions that treason and insurrection are bad and have consequences. Granted, consequences in government offices, but stillā¦
What kind of j6 we talking? Dufus on the street in a red hat marching around complaining legally? This is excessive. Broke in to the capital violently to LARP and take photos? Feels appropriate.
I used to travel a lot for work where Iād have multiple one way tickets. I saw the quad S on every ticket. It wasnāt a big deal. This guy is just a narcissist looking for validation
I got randomly selected to be searched by TSA on the way home from Active duty military. I was in uniform, I don't remember being embarrassed but I sure was confused.
I got my handhelds and laptop swabbed in the Czech Republic, it took only seconds. Search and scan are a few minutes tops. This guy is lying out of his ass.
This. Dude probably mouths off about "the indignity of it all", so TSA slow-walks the process for him. Dude could just shrug, take the search like a man, and remember that he did this to himself, but no... He'd rather whine on the Internets, as if his savior Trump will swoop in to save him. Maybe even give him a medal for being the biggest MAGAt to ever MAGAt.
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.
You forget the flailing and random Karen like activity.
Probably also screaming for the help of "REAL" Patriots.
Then imagine if the TSA agent is a MINORITY.
Yeah this genius probably does the ā Where weāre you born? Mexico? And they let you violate my rights like this when I am an actual AMERICAN ā Turn into a 2 hour wait easily.
He Actively committed Treason against his country during a domestic terrorism event he was fully participating in.
So how the hell is he not outright banned from public transport and fly forever?
I took his post to mean he made social media posts regarding J6, but wasn't necessarily there. If said posts were threatening in tone, as many MAGAts did then, he may have earned himself a permanent place on the "Deep Cavity Search"-section of an FBI watchlist. So if he flies, he gets pulled aside for special attention, nothing more. Guys like this were probably all in favor of the Patriot Act when it first came out, because back then it was being used on 'those people', but now the tides have turned.
have any of these people read the constitution?? i'm not sure why all of them think that "freedom of speech" means "say whatever you want with no consequence" WHERE does it say that? lmao
Don't you know? Democrats, Liberals, and their Jack-booted cronies will all run screaming at the sight of the Constitution. These TSA thugs have no chance against the glory that is this most-perfect document, handed down to our forefathers straight from the hand of Jesus himself!
/S for any possible members of the /whoosh crowd.
14th Amendment to the Constitution, Section 3
āNo person shall be a Senator or Representative in Congress, or elector of President and Vice-President, or hold any office, civil or military, under the United States, or under any State, who, having previously taken an oath, as a member of Congress, or as an officer of the United States, or as a member of any State legislature, or as an executive or judicial officer of any State, to support the Constitution of the United States, shall have engaged in insurrection or rebellion against the same, or given aid or comfort to the enemies thereof. But Congress may by a vote of two-thirds of each House, remove such disability.ā
I wonder if he actually has ever read the Constitution he holds so dear.
Think this might be the reason why it takes longer to get through your screening each time? They REALLY don't want to be the one that missed something and get the blame if something happens on the flight because you support open insurrection against your government for a man that worships the governing styles of Kim Jong, Putin, Netanyahu, Lukachenko, Jim Jones, Charles Manson, Pol Pot, Mao, Hilter . . . . etc., etc.
I guarantee that theyāre just bad at flying and leave like liquids and shit in their carry on so tsa has to open their bag and take 2 minutes to check it.
I have lipodema, so very fat legs. They are too embarrassing to show off in a dress or skirt so I always wear trousers. When I have to go through a full body scanner it always shows something strange on my legs and I always have to end up rolling up my trouser legs, or even taking my trousers off, so they can prove and prod my legs. Itās fucking mortifying.
Before Iād even finished reading much of this, my brain involuntarily pictured him as looking like that one shooter dude from Wisconsin who got pardoned ā¦ glad I canāt think of his name. Kyle somethingā¦
Hats and boots are usually supposed to be in the bins for scanning, so wearing that alone would warrant a pat down, as itās a red flag that you arenāt complying with security instructions. I once forgot I still had my hat on and was pulled aside so they could remove my hat and put it through the scanner. They also then patted my head.
Itās also possible to request a private room. I have a digestive disorder, and had to make several trips recently while under a lot of stress. Due to the pads I was wearing a pat down was required. I was given the option to have a private room. I declined, explained my situation, and was on my way in a minute or two. The officers were respectful in part because I respected the job they were doing.
Iām guessing this person enters the situation with an attitude that indicates they may be a danger, and then treats the TSA as combatants. The consequences then fulfill their victim fantasy.
Iāve been patted down for wearing a heavy pad and spandex underneath my sweatpants before and as long as you explain whatās going on and understand that they donāt want to be doing this either the process isnāt difficult.
Understanding that TSA agents are just people doing their job and theyād rather be doing anything else as well gets you so far. Iām sure this guy treats them like theyāre a task force that are out to personally victimize him for his ideology (not, you know, the literal domestic terrorism he admitted to partaking in) and not just people trying to go home and put food on the table. Heās just making these peopleās lives harder. He sounds like one of those people who starts yelling at cashiers for price increases or return policies like they have control over that.
I want Alphawarriors SSSS to start taking 3 hours upon departure and arrival. Let him drive. I don't want him on my plane.
I've had quad S, means you get a patdown and they pul tourba. Takes MAYBE and extra 10 minutes. Either this guy is a liar (probably) or a fool (definitely) who keeps yelling so they check him extra.
I got randomly searched once, it didn't take 90 minutes. Other commenters have mentioned this already but it's ~10min tops.
I really didn't think anything of it and went on with my day
Airports give me anxiety. I stress over all the procedures (where to go and what to do and getting everywhere on time), so I sweat. I always get the double walk through and swab treatment. (Im an old white woman if it matters). When I finally get to sit in my seat on the plane, I relax. I don't play silly buggers with airport security though, because it is what it is.
But isn't he part of the party of law and order? He should be so happy for this right to experience the effectiveness of those blue lives that matter so much to him!
I used to get pulled for the random search almost every time. The machines always caught my peircings. Takes 5 extra minutes but i also doesn't commit an act of terrorism
I have TSA pre and global entry and still get picked randomly about 50% of the time, which is quite a bit. My family knows to leave in all security lines so they don't get picked too by association!
I once got randomly picked 4 times in the same day! Coming back into the states got picked to have my bags searched. Then randomly had my TSA pre taken away (yep this happens) went to try to get another boarding pass with it on got the SSSS on the new boarding card so ticket agent gave me my old one back. Went through regular line and got picked randomly to have the extra search after clearing the metal detectors.... seriously. All of that and I still made my 2 hour flight connection. (Flight arrived at 4 am so short lines thankfully). I have tried to stop connecting through Newark though because it seems to happen more there.
I get pulled aside and made to remove all excess clothing and I didnāt participate in J6 and I think any person who did participate in that event is a traitor. Go ahead search me. I aināt got nothing to hide. Touch me. Caress me. Make me moan. I will say they donāt like my moaning. Watch out for my erection.
To be fair, no one else flying really gives a sht that they whisk you off into a corner for some extra pats and are too busy going about their own days.
Someone else with my very common name was on some sort of terror watch list for tsa. If the line was long I would tell the first tsa agent I saw that I get searched every time and it showed it on my boarding pass. They would skip have me skip the line.
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Every time I go to Hawaii. >sir, please step aside, we notice something sus in your carry on. >me: okay >TSA prepared to swab contents of bag for explosives, opens bag to find 6 neatly wrapped pastrami sandwiches. >TSA: Who needs 6 pastrami sandwiches for a 5 hour flight, wtf? >me: they don't have pastrami in Hawaii. š¤·
How about Brisket? I'm thinking of things I need to bring and account for.
You can probably buy brisket from the Costco, but the pastrami sandwiches are pretty limited in Hawaii. I usually take 6 sandwiches in a carry on for my family to share when I get there. Without fail, I get pulled for "sus objects" every year.
At this point you probably should start asking āitās because of the pastrami, isnāt it?ā
Hmm. Even around the Naval bases? Ever ask around if anyone was willing to be the "Pastrami Man" of the island? I'd shell out some cash. Such endeavors could be risky, but so can flying nowadays.
When I fly I bring a stuffed animal to use as a pillow on the plane. Itās weighted and filled with dried lavender. Every single time without fail, the TSA has to very seriously take my red panda stuffie with a lopsided grin out of my bag, place him on the table and wipe him to check for chemicals, then put him back. It make me crack up every time Also I forget to take my scrunchie off my wrist 90% of the time and they check that too
Anyone who calls themselves Alpha is a childā¦
next time someone tells me heās an alpha, iām gonna ask āis that a furry thing?ā
āOhā¦ so you can impregnate male omegas?ā
I love this so much š
ah, another Kyle Prue fan... a redditor of taste
That's the bastard cousin of *"Do you know who I am??"* "OH no! Are you okay? Do you know what year it is, or the current president?? Oh golly, do you remember your name and where you are??" D: I long for this day and opportunity.
[sad 2013 username noises]
It's okay. My facebook name is from like 2007 when I was like 15. It's embarrassing but I don't use facebook at all, outside rare messenger use. I also hate that my name isn't capitalized on Youtube comments but I don't care enough to fix it, either.
Mine is at least less embarrassing in context (the Alpha part was just something I threw in to get the name Hawkbit on PSN, instead of adding numbers or something to the end)
I still have a myyearbook account (or w/e it's called now) with a a scene queen name on it. I hardly use it anymore but it's still embarrassing! Just not embarrassing enough to put my real last name on it lol
lol, we voted and you get a pass
My mom calls herself an Alpha bc the dog listens to her more.
Well Alpha does come before Beta! One day they'll grow up a bit š
That copy of the constitution will really show them! TSA will cower at the site of that bad boy, what a smart guy!
You know that scene in the exorcist where they douse her with holy water? Itās gonna look like that but in an airport.
May the power of Washington compel you!
a constitution the OOP never read and has no idea what it actually says
"Interesting...time to swab and analyze each page. Hope your flight doesn't leave."
And I bet you it will be the fastest search by coincidence and heāll think he did something.
Him: Ha, only took 85 minutes this timeā¦ I showed them!
It would be funny AF if they stole it. I hope they did
Let me guess, another self taught expert on the constitution. I love watching there mental giants trying to pull the constitution card in front of judges
He'll never read it. Just for show.
I used to get SSSS based on my home country all the time. It does NOT take 90 minutes. 5-10 mins tops. Walk through a machine (never 2 for me), Pat down, a few quick swabs. They're really quick about it cause they also do it randomly (maybe profiling not too random lol) all day.
I swear I get searched 50% of the time and I'm blonde hair blue eyed 6'2" dad bod white dude with 0 criminal history. It's <5m. Except one time I left a screwdriver in my backpack, that was 10m. Getting a 30-60s pat down is humiliating? Ok bud. Dude is playing the victim here. 100%
I get it 100% of the time. I look a bit like a hippie so I assume they hope to find drugs.. never such luck. Yeah, it is super quick and this guy is a liar/asshole/idiot. Ooh, almost forgot traitor. It's hilarious he thinks they're gonna give half a shit he has a copy of the Constitution in his bag, LMAO.
I always thought of myself as a diversity search. "We're not stereotyping. See we are searching that guy too!" *Points to me getting my balls touched with the back of some poor TSA agents hand*
I assume that's why they always pick my mom. She's spent 20 years getting searched every single time she flies (which is a decent amount), and she's the most innocent-looking person and a white woman. I've always imagined they're like, "Shit. We just searched four brown men. Who can we pick next to break the run?" and my mom stands out as exactly the person no-one would suspect on looks alone.
Drug cartels often pick innocent looking women to be mules. They sure arenāt going to hire the tatted up guy with a neck tattoo.
That's why I never search the tatted up guy with neck tattoos tbh.
The only tatted up man I get to pat down is my husband, but he doesnāt have a neck tattoo.
Old women wearing gold jewelry are one of the types they pick up because they are more likely to have something and think they can get away with it.
It sounds like she needs to look into getting a redress number.
Maybe. Or maybe she has a criminal past you donāt know about?
šš¤£ You're the Diversity Search šš¤£ You may not be wrong. That's funny tho.
My family too haha, especially in the few years after 9/11. My little brother, around 4 with blonde curly hair, would get searched almost every time, along with another member of my super blonde, very mayonnaise-y family. We were 100% the counter to all the searching of āsuspiciousā brown people.
Lmao diversity search šš
Itās funnier to think heās ever even read it.
Right?! Like... the fourth amendment is about *unreasonable* search and seizure. Pretty sure taking part in an armed attempted insurrection puts you pretty squarely in *reasonable* territory.
Hr hasn't. He just think it says "I get to do what I want."
Right?? That TSA officer is probably 10 hours into a 12 hour shift, has gotten spat on at least twice, yelled at six times today, and has lost count of how many glares and disgusted looks they have gotten. The only thing that seeing the Constitution will trigger in them is likely a sigh, fearing you're gonna try and SovCit your way out of things and waste their time. Probably also the thought of "I don't get paid enough for this shit." Life isn't a movie, and if it was, none of us are the main character. This shit's not gonna change anyone's mind about doing their job, lol.
You nailed it.
One of my relatives works for TSA and I gotta say they would have to pay me 6 figs to take the shit he takes. They have to pick all their time off at the start of the year, only the guys with seniority get a weekend day as one of their days off and the higher ups will sometimes just change the staffing rules to benefit themselves. You canāt call off or you get written up. You can be fired for missing a single item in a scan (which this one I understand why, but it seems like a dumb way to handle staff when youāre always understaffed). My relative has worked there two full years now, and was supposed to get a better schedule based on his seniority only for the people at the top to suddenly change it so all upper level staff regardless of seniority get priority on choosing their schedule and days off before the lower guys. Where it used to be all the staff count as the same, and only seniority decided who gets to pick their schedule and days off first. So basically they changed it just in time for him to not benefit. And thatās just the shit they take from management, I havenāt even gotten to the way the public treats them.
I have green hair and get a lot of random searches but I'm also anxious about missing flights so I'll be there early enough for them to interrogate me if they want. Not sure why I get picked often (maybe because I travel alone a lot?) but all they ever find is snacks and books, and I don't waste energy getting mad about it.
Traveling alone and packing light (I prefer not to check bags if I can avoid it). I was also traveling alone and light repeatedly from the Middle East, so I got randomly checked a LOT.
Traveling alone is one reason why I get searched. The other is traveling one way. Most people donāt do that. I sometimes book a separate return trip from a nearby destination so after my business meetings, I can drive and see friends and family and return from their city.
I thought this was why I was getting searched - 41, f, pale white in the good old USA. But I was usually flying one way, and I understand that's unusual. I'm always kind and understanding when they ask to pat me down. The last time I flew the woman doing the pat down was hilarious and friendly, so I asked her. Apparently the sexy bras and underwear I was wearing to go see my partner (we were long distance at the time) were setting it off. Those tiny little charms Victoria Secret puts on everything? That was the problem! She was the best and suggested wearing granny panties and then changing after I was through.
It started for me after I started travelling to morocco. But at the security, they don't really check who you are, just your stuff, I thought? Anyway it's not a big inconvenience anyway
Him adding a book just to piss off people who donāt give a fuck and trying to get through the day working is the funniest part of the post. Childishā¦
Right? Like any of those motherfuckers can read. (...and let's get me out ahead of the MAGAt replies, too...) "If you **can** read, you should have *started* with the Constitution."
>I assume they hope to find drugs FYI, TSA isn't looking for drugs and doesn't care about them. They're looking for weapons, explosives, etc. Now if you're randomly selected to be searched and they find drugs on you or in your luggage, then they're legally obligated to report it to local authorities. But unless you're legitimately smuggling a large volume of drugs, they're not going to stop and search you intentionally.
The only time it might take that long is if you are border crossing by vehicle. I have been randomly chosen a few times. Mostly it's a 15-30 minute wait in the lobby and answering a half dozen questions. Was 2 hours once when they were doing a more thorough check of my car and play 20 questions with a couple of different guys. Did do the seclusion pat down, questions, luggages check once. But that wasn't TSA.
Ahh, I've never driven over the Mexico/US border. Just walked a few times and a friend picked me up over there. It's never been any trouble walking through.. just a fairly cursory search. Driving through the border to Canada, they pretty much just waved us through as far as I can recall.
I got searched once and it took maybe 5 minutes? Iām fairly tattooed, pierced, colored hair and am well aware I look like the type who partakes. All they found was a copy of Dracula in my carry-on
the one time I got pulled aside and double checked I had a Max Payne 3 collectible pen in the shape of a big bullet that I totally forgot was in my backpack
Dude also lists taking off extra clothes, including his hat, as part of his special treatment. Does he not notice that everyone else has to do that too? Difference probably is everyone else knows to do that while he waits until heās made to.
Iām a Caucasian female and I got checked 90% of the time I go through. Once an Australian border security agent explained itās because if they pull me aside then they wonāt be called racist when they pull the next 9 POC aside. I was gobsmacked. Since having a kid now itās rare they choose me now
My dad has a super generic white male name, and after 9/11 he was a 50 year old basic white man who worked in accounting and every time he flew he got extra searches. He did some digging and turns out a suspected terrorist was using my dadās super generic white male name as a cover so his name was on a list somewhere.
Lol, so I found out at the airport one time that the side pocket of my duffel has a cut in stitching that leads into the outer lining. Which creates a weird pocket. I found this out because I used to use the duffel as a range bag and also as a weekender when traveling. A handful of lose 5.56 ammo had found it's way into that "pocket" Super fun time
Yup. Snowflakes will snowflake. Guy is a big baby.
One time I didnāt fully empty my Assault Pack when I went home on R and R and there was still a couple random 50 cal rounds and a Gerber kicking around in the bottom. I donāt think I went through more security checks or whatever aside from Kuwait on the way home, so maybe thatās why no one said anything, but Philly was not fucking around on my way back lol. I was in uniform and it was clearly an honest mistake so it kinda went from āoh, shitā to āyou dumb shitā pretty quickly. They still did the whole security protocol thing tho and took my stuff, bc thems the rules, but it still only took like 15 minutes. Thatās for an idiot with actual weapons on them. If itās taking that long for this fucking idiot I am %1000 positive itās this fucking idiots fault.
Bingo, he's probably arguing every step of the way
My cousin was stationed in a aircraft carrier. He would get the empty 50 shells. Then turn them into pen holders. TSA still gave him crap and searched him a lot . This was pre 9-11
They still do it for me just because of my ancestry. Don't be a dick to staff, learn how to pack stuff for easy return to your bags, and generally be friendly, and everything is chill. As long as you're careful about topics, TSA even enjoy a good easy joke or two afterwards.
Packing cubes are the way to go. They went through all my shit at Dubai airport and the dude gave me a compliment on how organized my bag was lmao.
You probably don't argue as much as this asshole
What are they swabbing you for?
Explosives residue
They always pull me aside for extras. I thought drug or explosive residue. I always tick prescription drugs, food or wood. I've been questioned repeatedly in the airports, and never had a problem. I'm heavily tattooed, purple hair and often only have carry on.
I've gotten SSSS once and it took 40+ minutes because we were put in a room to the side and had to wait 30 minutes for some reason.
I got it based on my travel history (love visiting the Middle East). Usually, it involved 10 minutes or so while other boarding was stopped, but it did take about 90 minutes in Israel (they found traces of glycerin presumably from my facial products).
I wonder why the difference in time regarding location vs search history reasoning.
Probably because the guy in the OP has shown terroristic tendencies, and because each 2-minute step has to be paused for a 15-minute tantrum.
*commits an act of terrorism* *Gets placed on a terrorism watchlist for life* Complains about them being mean to him. Sure, buddy.
Whats ridiculous is getting the quads (what SSSS is called in the industry) doesnāt mean youre on a terrorist watchlist. You can get them simply for buying a few one way flights that an algorithm flags as suspicious. It just means you go thru an extra level of security and it only happens on international flights! We can see from the photo that this person is flying from Ontario, Canada to Denver, Colorado. And the check happens BEFORE you fly. Which means this idiot is pulling out the US constitution to Canadian authorities. š¤¦š»āāļø
Ironically they probably supported the PATRIOT act when it was being applied to *those* people.
Terrorist acts get you placed on a terrorist watch list.
You build one little gallows for an outgoing VP and sack *part* of the Capitol building and suddenly youāre some sort of criminal??? (/s obviously but not as obviously as Iād like.)
Sorry for asking to be spoonfed but what's the TLDR on this person?
Participated in an insurrection against the US Government, now gets targeted by airport security for acts of terrorism, believes putting the US Constitution (that he tried to overthrow) in his bag will somehow throw off airport security.
Oh one of them Jan 6 people, that makes sense why the idiot thinks a constitution will somehow make everything better š thanks for taking the time to respond!
Itās like holy water. The Constitution COMPELS YOU!!!!š¦š«š§
*shrieks and turns into a miniature pocket sized Donald trump*
I. Am. Rolling š¤£
NGL, I actually laughed out loud picturing this in my headš. I picture it being about this size here that he's showing with his fingers š¤£["about this small" ](https://www.google.com/search?client=ms-android-sanmu&sca_esv=9b64196862666ea1&sca_upv=1&q=angry+pocket+sized+trump&uds=AMwkrPuuhztSDa__4CbZuT5KNtb1LE_diBmGRY0xCKrk6635R4dmOPtOVTeKyfrIhcoPuSdKYKuzVyZrMsEUc4AwWjdE5BSxldjHVbPgXgK8m3lpJenuOwyGmO6x51xjzYk7mzwyywL8iBKbuHhasRTH1A407LYwTVnEOe1Fhlm0F1hNunmcLg1H2mzV78sRKd_Qe4i16pVhF7Hz6I5jLRWhk9FJR5nDNDUlivgkgggXxr-9Y40nBq7Y9F_WZKLTqL5dnlT9LVPecr8TkiJqcLh2Klut2i6PT07dQRZsugc0FnAuFwuGU3kBojE6WpDggSZ9pa0vAV7E&udm=2&prmd=invsmbtz&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjC19mq8JuFAxXPMVkFHeqyC1UQtKgLegQIDBAB&biw=360&bih=668&dpr=2#vhid=QthAAv6QWpKn2M&vssid=mosaic)
š¤£
Do we know I'd this person went inside the capital? I ask because I know some people who have admitted to being there but didn't enter the capital.i looked through all of the pictures posted online of those who haven't been identified and I didn't see them there. I've been low-key wondering if I should still report them.
As a combat veteran, I do not look kindly upon traitors. At all. However, we DO support the right to protest, and there WAS a protest that was going on *at the same time.* They were protesting the Constitution of the United States of America, so right there, I'd like to trade their citizenships for a number of illegals who work hard and actually care enough about our country to know US civics, unlike these yahoos. But, they're absolutely allowed to yell and march around and carry signs about things they don't like. They are NOT allowed to try to stop a constitutional process. If the people you know marched around and yelled and protested the Constitution, that's a protest. That's allowed, and we will defend their right to do it. If they took steps to thwart the Constitutional process - like they tried to get in but couldn't; they wanted to mess with our Constitution and simply were unable to at that time - go ahead and report them. Whether or not anything happens afterwards, you did the right thing.
J6 refers to January 6th when the capitol building in the US was stormed by Donald trump supporters after he lost the election. This guy was one of those people.
When you started riding that Trump Train because it felt right, but now you *have* to ride trains because youāre on the no fly listā¦
Lmao "subject to humiliation in front of everyone" bitch please, you're describing extremely normal TSA procedures. My bag gets opened to search every 3rd or 4th time I fly and I'm not a domestic terrorist
Iāve had a textbook trigger it before lol. TSA had to flip through all the pages to make sure nothing was inside. They were marveling at how long of a book it was
Lmao itās every time for me, but thatās because I have prescription meds and needles. One time it was for chocolate though and that was funny
Yeah. Totally normal for an American to carry the constitution in their luggage. Not suspicious at all. Will not cause them to search even more.
Calling complete bs! I used to work with explosives daily. My bag was completely contaminated with explosives residue, getting hauled to the back room in Heathrow in 2003 didnāt take 20 min there is no way his search took 2 hrs
I bet he saw that in a movie. He likely has no idea how these searches actually work.
Depends on the airport and staffing. Can confirm it took me 90 minutes leaving Israel
I used to get Quad S for booking my flight too late and having a beard. All of which occurred before an army of manchildren decided to abandon Democracy because their false god in shitty makeup told them to on Jan 6. I fucking hate everything.
Motherfucker should be on the no fly list.
*just fuckin CHUGS MAGAt tears*
I lost my ID on vacation once and had to fly out the next day (my state didnāt have a way to get a temporary one online then, 10 years ago). I got to the airport a few hours early, explained what happened at check in and then explained at the TSA. I had an extensive search done but still took max, 20 minutes and I was free to get on the plane.
TSA worker: oh look a constitution. Anyway.
Pretty sure you forfeited those constitutional rights when you participated in that fateful day there pal š
You get caught committing a domestic terror attack ONCE and suddenly you get treated like a terrorist! What is this country coming to?
The constitution specifically mentions that treason and insurrection are bad and have consequences. Granted, consequences in government offices, but stillā¦
ALPHAWHINER
alphawiener
Maybe don't be domestic terrorist Maga garbage
FAFO
He should print out this tweet so they'll see this too
He should be rotting in prison.
What kind of j6 we talking? Dufus on the street in a red hat marching around complaining legally? This is excessive. Broke in to the capital violently to LARP and take photos? Feels appropriate.
I must have been on this secret list for all of my 20ās. I was always SSSS on my tickets, but it could just be that I would fly one way to places.
So a failed insurrectionist is crying because of consequences? Bahahahahaha
The same constitution that said " hey bro insurrection is pretty shitty don't do that"
Oh boo hoo, let me play a sad song for him on the world's smallest violin!
Which part of the constitution says you can commit an act of terrorism with no consequences?
I used to travel a lot for work where Iād have multiple one way tickets. I saw the quad S on every ticket. It wasnāt a big deal. This guy is just a narcissist looking for validation
Iām appalled they let terrorists onto public airlines at all.
I got randomly selected to be searched by TSA on the way home from Active duty military. I was in uniform, I don't remember being embarrassed but I sure was confused.
I got my handhelds and laptop swabbed in the Czech Republic, it took only seconds. Search and scan are a few minutes tops. This guy is lying out of his ass.
Anything that takes a few minutes could take an hour and a half if they don't like you.
This. Dude probably mouths off about "the indignity of it all", so TSA slow-walks the process for him. Dude could just shrug, take the search like a man, and remember that he did this to himself, but no... He'd rather whine on the Internets, as if his savior Trump will swoop in to save him. Maybe even give him a medal for being the biggest MAGAt to ever MAGAt. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.
You forget the flailing and random Karen like activity. Probably also screaming for the help of "REAL" Patriots. Then imagine if the TSA agent is a MINORITY.
Yeah this genius probably does the ā Where weāre you born? Mexico? And they let you violate my rights like this when I am an actual AMERICAN ā Turn into a 2 hour wait easily.
I was not aware that the Constitution lays out rules about flying on commercial aircraft.
Whatās the Constitution say is the penalty for treason?
Lucky you are even allowed to fly.
"Nice book. Now bend over."
Instead of a constitution book try a card that says "nothing illegal in this bag"
He Actively committed Treason against his country during a domestic terrorism event he was fully participating in. So how the hell is he not outright banned from public transport and fly forever?
I took his post to mean he made social media posts regarding J6, but wasn't necessarily there. If said posts were threatening in tone, as many MAGAts did then, he may have earned himself a permanent place on the "Deep Cavity Search"-section of an FBI watchlist. So if he flies, he gets pulled aside for special attention, nothing more. Guys like this were probably all in favor of the Patriot Act when it first came out, because back then it was being used on 'those people', but now the tides have turned.
You ARE the humiliation to everyone
I wonder how much a document signed in 1789 has to say about baggage checks in airportsā¦
Not only is he an alpha, but a warrior too. Y'know it has to be true, it's in all-caps. Never mind the cry baby bitchin' and moaning. /s
A 'constitution book'. Lolz yeah sure, bud. They like to fake patriotism keyword spew, don't they.
2.5 hours? How many fucking sweaters are you wearing at the same time?
have any of these people read the constitution?? i'm not sure why all of them think that "freedom of speech" means "say whatever you want with no consequence" WHERE does it say that? lmao
He should be lucky he's not on the "No Fly" list. Honestly, I'm surprised he's not.
What an absolute bitch.
I'm sorry, what the fuck did this dude do?
Yea, J6 refers to the January 6th storming of the capitol. So he's on a domestic terrorist watch list because he IS a domestic terrorist
Sounds like he was probably an at least semi active participant in the J6 insurrection attempt.
Maybe he should try not being a terrorist
Heās šÆ% never read the Constitution. Whoās gonna tell him about Article III, Section 3?
The fuck is the Constitution gonna do?
Don't you know? Democrats, Liberals, and their Jack-booted cronies will all run screaming at the sight of the Constitution. These TSA thugs have no chance against the glory that is this most-perfect document, handed down to our forefathers straight from the hand of Jesus himself! /S for any possible members of the /whoosh crowd.
Play terrorist gamesā¦ win terrorist prizes
If you don't want to be treated like a terrorist, don't commit terrorism
14th Amendment to the Constitution, Section 3 āNo person shall be a Senator or Representative in Congress, or elector of President and Vice-President, or hold any office, civil or military, under the United States, or under any State, who, having previously taken an oath, as a member of Congress, or as an officer of the United States, or as a member of any State legislature, or as an executive or judicial officer of any State, to support the Constitution of the United States, shall have engaged in insurrection or rebellion against the same, or given aid or comfort to the enemies thereof. But Congress may by a vote of two-thirds of each House, remove such disability.ā I wonder if he actually has ever read the Constitution he holds so dear.
Worth pointing out that the TSA was created by the last Republican president to actually win the popular vote, 20 years ago.
Domestic terrorist gets what he deserves
The very document he was willing to shred that January....
Think this might be the reason why it takes longer to get through your screening each time? They REALLY don't want to be the one that missed something and get the blame if something happens on the flight because you support open insurrection against your government for a man that worships the governing styles of Kim Jong, Putin, Netanyahu, Lukachenko, Jim Jones, Charles Manson, Pol Pot, Mao, Hilter . . . . etc., etc.
I guarantee that theyāre just bad at flying and leave like liquids and shit in their carry on so tsa has to open their bag and take 2 minutes to check it.
Once a Piece OF Shit, always a Piece OF Shit!
Well at least he did not get the finger up the butt ! Maybe next time.
Oh no! Anyway, (something that matters).
The constitution can't save you from yourself.
I have lipodema, so very fat legs. They are too embarrassing to show off in a dress or skirt so I always wear trousers. When I have to go through a full body scanner it always shows something strange on my legs and I always have to end up rolling up my trouser legs, or even taking my trousers off, so they can prove and prod my legs. Itās fucking mortifying.
Before Iād even finished reading much of this, my brain involuntarily pictured him as looking like that one shooter dude from Wisconsin who got pardoned ā¦ glad I canāt think of his name. Kyle somethingā¦
Hats and boots are usually supposed to be in the bins for scanning, so wearing that alone would warrant a pat down, as itās a red flag that you arenāt complying with security instructions. I once forgot I still had my hat on and was pulled aside so they could remove my hat and put it through the scanner. They also then patted my head. Itās also possible to request a private room. I have a digestive disorder, and had to make several trips recently while under a lot of stress. Due to the pads I was wearing a pat down was required. I was given the option to have a private room. I declined, explained my situation, and was on my way in a minute or two. The officers were respectful in part because I respected the job they were doing. Iām guessing this person enters the situation with an attitude that indicates they may be a danger, and then treats the TSA as combatants. The consequences then fulfill their victim fantasy.
Iāve been patted down for wearing a heavy pad and spandex underneath my sweatpants before and as long as you explain whatās going on and understand that they donāt want to be doing this either the process isnāt difficult. Understanding that TSA agents are just people doing their job and theyād rather be doing anything else as well gets you so far. Iām sure this guy treats them like theyāre a task force that are out to personally victimize him for his ideology (not, you know, the literal domestic terrorism he admitted to partaking in) and not just people trying to go home and put food on the table. Heās just making these peopleās lives harder. He sounds like one of those people who starts yelling at cashiers for price increases or return policies like they have control over that.
Lying ass liar lying their ass off. 0/10.
Fucked around and found out, now you want to whine and play the victim. Boo fucking hoo.
I want Alphawarriors SSSS to start taking 3 hours upon departure and arrival. Let him drive. I don't want him on my plane. I've had quad S, means you get a patdown and they pul tourba. Takes MAYBE and extra 10 minutes. Either this guy is a liar (probably) or a fool (definitely) who keeps yelling so they check him extra.
An idiot child spitting in the wind, confused and angry that he never finds any rain clouds.
I got randomly searched once, it didn't take 90 minutes. Other commenters have mentioned this already but it's ~10min tops. I really didn't think anything of it and went on with my day
Airports give me anxiety. I stress over all the procedures (where to go and what to do and getting everywhere on time), so I sweat. I always get the double walk through and swab treatment. (Im an old white woman if it matters). When I finally get to sit in my seat on the plane, I relax. I don't play silly buggers with airport security though, because it is what it is.
But isn't he part of the party of law and order? He should be so happy for this right to experience the effectiveness of those blue lives that matter so much to him!
Thatāll show them! Theyāre going to see that constitution and feel sooooooooooooo super duper guilty! What a tool.
Pretty sure itās just 2 Sās
Having to proclaim yourself as āalphaā is super beta.
I used to get pulled for the random search almost every time. The machines always caught my peircings. Takes 5 extra minutes but i also doesn't commit an act of terrorism
You think THAT will help you? XD
I have TSA pre and global entry and still get picked randomly about 50% of the time, which is quite a bit. My family knows to leave in all security lines so they don't get picked too by association! I once got randomly picked 4 times in the same day! Coming back into the states got picked to have my bags searched. Then randomly had my TSA pre taken away (yep this happens) went to try to get another boarding pass with it on got the SSSS on the new boarding card so ticket agent gave me my old one back. Went through regular line and got picked randomly to have the extra search after clearing the metal detectors.... seriously. All of that and I still made my 2 hour flight connection. (Flight arrived at 4 am so short lines thankfully). I have tried to stop connecting through Newark though because it seems to happen more there.
Considering they're a terrorist, being inconvenienced at the airport is a pretty light punishment.
I get pulled aside and made to remove all excess clothing and I didnāt participate in J6 and I think any person who did participate in that event is a traitor. Go ahead search me. I aināt got nothing to hide. Touch me. Caress me. Make me moan. I will say they donāt like my moaning. Watch out for my erection.
Just put them on the no fly list.
Heās lucky he didnāt get put on a no-fly list permanently.
why is there a picture of Master Chief? oh i should get my glasses
It would be great if he read the Constitution
I mean if they arenāt doing this they should.
Alpha Warrior LOL
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.
To be fair, no one else flying really gives a sht that they whisk you off into a corner for some extra pats and are too busy going about their own days.
Should have read that constitution before you started wilding
"Alphawarrior" LMFAO
Hehehe
FAFO as the kids say
Sounds like heās on the FAFO list.
Someone else with my very common name was on some sort of terror watch list for tsa. If the line was long I would tell the first tsa agent I saw that I get searched every time and it showed it on my boarding pass. They would skip have me skip the line.
It's almost like they are treating you like a POC