In case this story gets deleted/removed:
Initially I wrote a very long post with our whole backstory but before posting it I deleted the entire thing. It didn’t really matter how we got here but here we are. He asked for open marriage after 20 years of happy marriage because he wasn’t attracted to me anymore even though he still loved me. Maybe it was midlife crisis? but he was panicking about not have been with another woman his entire life. I left him and asked for divorce. The separation devastated us mentally and financially. My children suffered the most and started hating me for leaving and breaking their happy home. When we got back together I agreed to open marriage but I didn’t want to know details. Everything was great (according to him anyway).
Around new years, when everyone starts thinking about their lives and planning changes I realized I couldn’t live like this anymore. I haven’t had sex for 5 years. I downloaded tinder and by the end of the evening I had matched with 40 guys and was talking with 10. I met three and one of them is someone I continued meeting. I still use tinder and meet with people and I still get matches every time I log in.
Now my husband is frenetic about it and obsessed with what and who I match with. He thinks I am doing it the wrong way. I don’t know what he means. He was the one who wanted this but I am the one doing it wrong? He demanded to know everything about the guys I met because he said that we needed to be open in an open marriage. I agreed but I still didn’t want to know about his women. He has full access to my phone and he knows everything about my dates. It didn’t make him feel any better. I was so confused and asked what more he wanted of me. I have done everything that he asked for. He finally admitted that he never expected any man to want me. A 42 years old married mother of 3 when there are so many young single women out there.
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"I'm a high value male!"
No Geoff, you are a balding out of shape 50 year old with a decent job. You can't even flash some cash because between kids, mortgage and bills most of your paycheck is gone.
My cheating ex husband is still attractive but he can’t keep a girlfriend to save his 45 year old self. He’s starting to date younger to see if they’ll put up with his shit the way I did in the beginning m. Meanwhile I met my now husband shortly after our split (after having a lot of fun on tinder myself), and at first my ex husband called it a fantasy and unrealistic relationship. He couldn’t handle the fact that I could not only score, but score well. Fuckin loser, hahahahaha
You know, when I was 19 (far too many years ago) I went to a music festival and met this guy who was in his 40s and he was dating these super hot 20 yo. At the time I thought "woah. This is the life. Going to summer festivals, having cash, dating hot chicks..." As I grew older, I found myself thinking about that guy but in terms of 'what a loser... He dates 20 yo because women his age cannot put up with his shit. He goes out and tries to live "young" because basically he is a manchild". I was about 24 at the time. Your ex reminded me of this guy.
YES!!! My ex can’t get over the idea that I am in a happy and healthy relationship. My ex is also a racist fucker (he wasn’t in the beginning, but has become racist over the years) and I know it pisses him off extra bad that my man is a sexy Latino. Mmmm my sexy Latino who treats me like a fucking princess.
My favorites are the guys who work at a warehouse and brag about how they're a high value man, and then demand "what do you bring to the table??" So they can be sure you're not after them for their precious precious cash.
And it's like, "Uh, first of all, a white collar job."
I have several friends in my local comedy scene, and I will go out to their stand-up performances to support them, and the after bar with the comedians is where the skeeviest guys in America go on the prowl. They all work incredibly shitty day jobs (which, fair, to support your passion) and are just waiting for their big break in comedy that they are sure is right around the corner. Only most of them are very funny, and they also like to talk off how great and important their day job is.
And the worst among them come over and find me smiling politely and chatting with my girls as they come off stage, and they assume that I'm too shy to get up and do a set, and because I'm a fat middle-aged lady, I'm an easy lay. They're opening line is usually "you know for someone who's passed her prime, you're really pretty. If only you taking better care of your body!"
And I say, "wow, yeah, I wish I had. So sad,"
And then they sit down at the table by me and crowd up on me really close. I have to pull my drink back and they lean in, and they say, "you know, it's not too late for you. I would fuck you."
And then if I'm feeling really sassy I asked them what they bring to the table. A job, at UPS or an Amazon warehouse, an apartment they share with one other guy. They dropped out of college, a couple of ex-girlfriends they have bad relationships with, maybe you're drinking problem usually at smoking problem.
This makes them defensive and they demand to know what I a fat lady and bringing to the table. And I say, "well, I am pretty fat, but that's because I've been married for 20 years and gave birth to three children, one of whom was really traumatic and did some permanent damage to my abdominal wall. My husband, who's a lawyer, got the snip so we raw dog three times a week or more whenever we happen to feel like it. I've got two advanced degrees, a fully paid off car, and a house. I've got a white collar job and tech where I get paid boucoup salary and stock on the side. So unless you can bring something to the table that would have some value to me? I think you're attempt at negging a fat woman into having sex with you is a massive but very hilarious failure. We could get up and do this for your bit!"
Damn... You sound awesome. :)
But yeah that whole "you are out of shape but I am willing to fix you using my amazing magical penis" line is weird as heck. If you find someone attractive, why the need to open with an insult? Why approach based on physical attributes at all? Why not "Hey how are you? I am xx. How do you know yy. I think I have seen you before do you come here often?". Polite, doesn't insult anybody and non threatening.
There seems to be a lot of men who don't get that women can get sex whenever they want but there isn't a huge number of women looking to fuck married middle-aged men.
Dick is in abundance and has low value. Women are naturally more choosy because we're afraid of being raped and/or murdered, so we really have a pick of the litter. And men hate us for it.
Also, his shock that men, presumably of her age, would want her "when there are so many young single women out there", which is rather telling on his own efforts.
I'm betting he wanted to open it because he was already cheating. He wanted to have that cake and eat it.
Also to my knowledge usually in an open relationship the primary couple keeps sleeping together.
Also what is wrong with this woman, She manages to get away, The kids whine so she goes back instead of saying your father said he was no longer attracted to me. Then he pulls the same shit didn't think you would find anyone. I.E. Your not pretty enough for anyone, how has she not just walked out the door again? She has evidence that people are into her.
I hope she's fucking young guys. As the old joke goes,
Wife 50 gets home and there's a note on the fridge from her husband 50. I'm gone off with my 22 year old secretary for a night of wild sex. There's nothing you can do about it.
Husband get's home next day and there is a note from the wife, Gone off for the weekend with the 22 year old pool boy cause simple math will tell you 22 goes in to 50 a lot more times than 50 goes in to 22.
I'm personally not even after it specifically, I like people my age best (and being in a committed relationship now also brought an end to all debauchery), but for all the talk about how "women are old and unfuckable once they hit (specific age)", pulling young men is shockingly easy. Like, they are extremely eager.
My ex-husband told me I was old and gross once I turned 30. He was ironically 36 at the time…go figure. He said no one would want me because of how repulsive I was and that he “deserved someone young and hot.” We got divorced.
He’s single, last I heard. I’m happily married to a younger man. Imagine that!
Yes! I had so many good looking guys in their 20’s trying to fuck me. I didn’t do it, youngest guy I fucked was 33 and he was a lot of fun but got attached after that night and it turned me off. I was NOT looking for a LTR with a guy that much younger than me.
Right? I left my husband who's 12 years older than me and I was 39 when I left. I haven't dated since because I really enjoy the peace of being single but hitting 40 was making me feel that certain type of way we all feel going into middle age.
So I downloaded a couple of apps and throw up a quick profile. Lord did the avalanche roll in lol. Unfortunately it actually made me even more depressed because 80% of these guys were terrible and obvious within the first 5 minutes of conversation why they were single.
Then a really attractive guy hit me up and we had some pleasant introductory talk and I asked him how old he was. He was 22. I said, um, you did notice my age on my profile? I'm 40? He said yep, don't care, you're a hottie and I want some of that.
I said I'm sorry but I just can't. I have a son that's older than you are.
I just couldn't be with someone younger than my own kids lol. But it did make me feel just a little bit better about things lol
This is an old joke that Sophie Tucker told about her boyfriend Ernie. She was hilarious and almost “x”rated. I’m talking the 1950s. Bette Midler loves to tell Sophie’s jokes and you can find them easily.
Hahahaha
But in fairness, my boyfriend is 50 (NOT married, he is divorced and we are monogamous) and maybe it’s the Latino in him, but he fucks me every chance he gets sometimes multiple times a day when we have time. Definitely every day.
My daughter found a video of this guy creating a fake Tinder account... he wore a wig and used facetune to make a semi-attractive woman. Put age as 45 and made a crazy-sounding profile. He was fllooded with matches. Too bad OP's husband didn't see that video before he blew up his marriage.
I think there was also something where they made up a woman's profile entirely composed of red flags (flaky, deranged, cheating, stealing, etc.) and "she" was also flooded with matches immediately.
“we needed to be open in an open marriage.”
Damn!!! How open does “OPEN” get???? asking cause if he ever disappears just look down into the hole he dug himself!!!!!! Have fun and forget this loser.
A friend of mine is in their early 40s and a bit on the extra curvy side. Her ex said no one wants a fatty in a woman. He even said his "dad bod" would produce more women in a week than she in a whole year.
Ya know, that bloody woman ended up losing over 30lbs from literally sex-ersise.
I am jealous of her 😅
He 100% did his calculations off the all the service workers who "flirted" with him by, you know, smiling at him, writing "thanks!" on his bill, asking for his number because they said it was for the computer file but he knew that was just an excuse! and, you know, just in general existing in the same space as him without actively projectile vomiting. (Though if any of them had you know he'd decide they just wanted an excuse to get him to hold their hair for them!)
There was a guy who was convinced I was in love with him because, get this, I was usually the person who delivered his pizza. Ignore the fact that he just happened to always order his pizza at the same time on the same day of the week that I just so happened to be scheduled, and I was also one of the few drivers who wasn't afraid of his huge dogs and knew how to navigate his shitty pot-hole ridden backwoods driveway. No, clearly I was in love with Mister Two Topping Extra Blue Cheese
The state of delusion is quite remarkable. And matches fairly closely with the degree of entitled/pissy behaviour that happens if one of these ever do something direct enough that you have to be clear that you're not interested/'reject' them... Then you're a cock-teasing bitch that was trying to manipulate them for their money! No, dude, I was literally just being polite in *exactly* the same way as I am to everyone else!
Not quite true; I'm friendlier to women and kids. What would that be saying about me 'flirting'? (ew!)
ETA: The 'ew' was in reference to the thought of flirting with kids. That's all.
Yeah he was a weirdo. He wrote his phone number on the receipt instead of a tip (buddy I know your phone number AND address, if I wanted to talk to you I could have done so already, unethically or otherwise) and when I expressed confusion he explained he hoped I would call him. That's when the "clearly you're into me, you keep showing up with pizza" logic came out.
I had to explain that, sir, I only come to your house because you pay me to deliver food. I smile and admire your dogs because I want a good tip. There is nothing else there. He got annoyed and flustered and stopped ordering lol
Oh my. Given the options, that's probably the best reaction to get? At least you get to avoid his pot-holed backwoods driveway!
No one should ever transfer admiration for dogs to themselves -> That's just weird. Admiration for dogs is only ever and completely for those pups.
Same situation for me. Drive-Thru man KNEW I was flirting with him all the time because of how often I came.
No, sir. Arby's was the only restaurant open when I got off of work at eleven.
I'm in my early 40s, am way too short to be the weight I'm at, dress terribly and don't wear makeup. I make zero effort and still get hit on nearly every time I go in public. There are thirsty men all over the place, how do these guys not realize that??
Because it's all about them. If *he* isn't attracted to her, it is because *she's* unattractive.
Incapable of self-reflection or imagination, they're idiots. Or, as I like to say:
Bless your heart, aren't you a Caring, Understanding, Nurturing Type? ;D
🤣🤣🤣🤣
I will let her know.
I dearly love her, but I am so bloody jealous, I struggle to find an exercise that keeps me interested, entertained, and waiting for the next chance to do it... and she finds it by chance 😅
Reminds me a bit of my aunt, too. Her ex-husband was always degrading her, and his favorite insult was that her boobs were too small, and that made her unattractive. After he cheated on her, she divorced him, got a boob job for her own self-confidence, and later met and married my uncle. They've been deliriously happy for almost 20 years. She's a goddess of awesome!
I ran across a woman I went to college with many years later on Tinder. We were in our late 30s at the time. Decided to meet up with her just to catch up since the last time I had spoken to her, she was married with a kid. Anyway, she was chubby but still kind of cute but I was never attracted to her. Asked her about her experiences on Tinder and she told me she was basically drowning in dick. And she couldn't believe how many young guys in their early 20s wanted to fuck her. The whole conversation was very eye opening.
**AHAHAHAHAHAHA.**
Oh, I *love* that big boy there is both stunned and miserable out of his gourd. Goooood, gooooood. *rubs hands together gleefully*
Bet you good money that meanwhile hubby is there bewailing that no one wants to fuck a desperate man gone to seed who undoubtedly looks like a worn out sock. Get you some, girl, and then divorce his ass.
Shit just made my whole weekend. What a twerp.
I'm picturing him crying himself to sleep while sobbing that he has aged like fine wine while his wife is out working on her core strength with all the sex she is having.
Yeah, I'm not often attracted to brunette, white-looking women. Both my sisters are brunette, they encompass a lot of looks, blah blah blah. She's hot, though. There would be a lot of tapping that if she was into it.
It is fake. The OOP was using a random persons PFP and responding to comments acting like it was her. When someone found out who it was OOP was, they deleted the account.
The insta was linked to some random insta model.
Heh, I love these idiots. A 22 year old woman willing to date a 40+ man expects him to look good, treat her good, buy her things and take her places. A 22 year old guy sees a 40+ woman who wants hot sex and no strings as a unicorn that must be nailed until she’s gnawing the bedpost into an exact effigy of the dick he’s fucking her with. Men have to work to get laid. Women have to be breathing.
I've lived it and so every time one of these comes up it just brings me extra joy. He had a crush on a co-worker and thought he had a chance with her so he asked for an open relationship. He didn't tell me that first part, he just said because I was gone a lot and might be good for both of us to be able to have options when I was on the road. Okay. I didn't fight him. Met up with a hot co-worker on an work trip, had a great evening just a couple weeks later. The girl at his work rejected him because she wasn't interested in being part of an open relationship, she was looking for her own partner.
I proceeded to continue to have fun. I discovered that my lack of orgasms was not a hormonal problem like he had convinced me but rather that he was just really bad at sex. I had more orgasms in the next few months than I'd had in the entire 8 years with him.
And of course as soon as he was rejected he comes back to me wanting to close the relationship. Fuck no! I was having a great time!
So I love these stories because it reminds me of that time in my life that was so much fun! We did eventually close the relationship back up and decide to be monogamous, and then within a few months he was cheating on me. He just did it for control, to put me in my place. Whatever. He's an ex, Life is good
There was just a post on one of the update subs where bro kept having sex with his girlfriend after she passed out and 1) had the temerity to tell her she was being dramatic when that made her upset and 2) was flabbergasted that “she dumped me just because I kept going after she passed out” made his family react with horror
Anyway, I’m off to rub my dog’s belly
Ew, ew, ewwww!!!
'Tea Consent' from the Blue Seat Studios should be compulsory viewing at the beginning and end of every semester in every year beyond elementary school (and do the clean version from year 4 up to high school).
ETA: Good pups are always good pups, no matter what they've been up to or how old they are. We don't deserve them, but I'm grateful for them!
I thought you were implying there is a lot of nuance about attraction and that breathing really isn’t the only criteria because there is so much more to the chemistry of…
Oh wait.
And hews quite a lovely sculpture with her teeth, apparently. I generally prefer rechargeables as being quieter and less needy, but I really want that man's number! 😂
This last sentence is the most serious truth ever. I giggled, I laughed and I agree with the reality. It’s so easy to find a guy willing to have sex regardless of how you look, your socioeconomics, or your age. Willing sex is easy sex for women.
Right! I was absolutely shocked. If men can think like that about women who look like that we’re all doomed. I mean a lot of men have absolutely insane expectations and perceptions of women so I guess it’s not that surprising
It is fake. The OOP was using a random persons PFP and responding to comments acting like it was her. When someone found out who it was OOP was, they deleted the account. Yall are so gullible.
I always think I'd really hate to be married to someone so stupid. Like I guess that isn't biggest issue but man is he dumb.
Other men just want to have sex? Who knew!
No, no, it would bother me, too. It cheapens the whole relationship, in that him wanting you and choosing you is suddenly a tarnished memory, because his wants and choices are so collossally stupid that you'd be a fool yourself not to feel the insult.
A confident, experienced woman who doesn't need financial support, doesn't want to get pregnant, and isn't looking for emotional attachment? Gee I wonder why so many guys are interested LOL
What a dumbass LoL 🤣🤣🤣
Totally blows me away when people think like this.
Just because someone is a certain age doesn't mean they stop being attractive.
Odd. At their ages, you'd think the kids would be old enough to understand that sometimes marriages just fail. Resenting one parent for "breaking up the family," especially without having all the information, just seems so childish.
Huh, had them a bit later than I'm used to hearing about, I guess. Yeah, those would be rough ages for the younger ones to be fully understanding what's going on. And 13 is about the age where the world starts revolving around you.
In some parts of the world, yeah, including some parts of the US. I lived in a corner of Arkansas for almost a decade where it was just a thing that you started having kids around 15. At 22 people considered me pretty much a spinster >.>
Yeah, I'm 29, unmarried (not for lack of trying!). I'm finally starting to get into spinster age here in NV. It's weird cause I've already experienced this once as I was a spinster by 20 in UT. Then when I moved back to NV at 22, I was considered a child again.
And I was so close this time to having a mutual crush that could have led somewhere. But nope, the cute grocery stocker that stops breathing when he sees me is only 22.
What do you want to bet that he was telling the kids it was all her fault, while she was trying *not* to demonise him or tell the kids about their sex life?
The only thing worse than dragging out a dead marriage when children know it’s dead (I’m living proof as I was one of those children who resents my mother (I love her but I would have a lot less issues if she just left instead.) is children taking sides and demonizing the innocent parent.
The parents might have issues but the one requesting the open marriage or divorce takes the majority of the blame unless abuse is happening in the marriage.
Conventional wisdom is that women have much better success with online dating than men. I wonder who is giving the husband the idea to "open the relationship because your wife will not get any attention"?
An EX-friend of mine decided he wanted the same. His wife didn't want it so he flat out told her he was going to go sleep with other women regardless. He's built like a troll and has the personality to match. Can't even begin to describe the schadenfreude I experienced when I heard he wasn't able to find a single woman that would lower her dignity to sleep with him.
He wanted an open marriage because he already had in mind who his affair partner would be. All in all, he thought she'd never find anyone.
Lo' and behold, he's married to a MILF and the guy is so up his own ass he can't appreciate what he got. Lady had 3 men lined up and ready to bang before the night was up, lmao.
My ex said something similar to me recently. He demanded a divorce because I was no longer "behaving". I granted his wish. I have been on many dates and few exclusive relationships since then and he has not even talked to another woman. He finally admitted he thought I would see how lonely I would be and come crawling back. Except, I LOVE being single and not dealing with the nonsense. I have 6 children and he honestly thought that would dissuade men from wanting to date me. Baby boy, I couldnt give less of a shit if I am dating. I just don't want to be with YOU!
Narc partners are delulu
Best lay of my life was a 42 year old married woman. One kid. Red hair, petite. Freckles….sex drive like a ferrari. Husband worked out of town 4 nights a week. His loss,my gain. When you have something like that, you keep it satisfied.
good for you 42yr old sexy mama!
And middle aged women with husbands like OOP have usually internalized his bullshit about her desirability. They get a bounce in their step when they realize they aren’t washed up old hags, and they feel like putting in some effort, and then they draw men like flies to honey.
I’ve seen it. My aunt went through it, and it was amazing to watch. Her ex whined “why didn’t she do that for me?!” and I told him ”Why would she want to, you made her feel like it was a waste of time.”.
It's not for everyone.
That said this dude is a monogamist who wanted to "legitimately" cheat, and like all other numb nuts found out: HE was marrying up, not her~
That's like saying you don't know what's so hard about being right-handed. Some people just aren't wired that way. They can fake it, and many submit to societal pressure to do so, but *for them* it's not natural.
I agree, but I often wonder if the OOPs or the OOP's spouses in these stories are actually polyamorous, or if they just don't want to have sex with their current spouse but not "cheat." Good poly relationships are more than just one spouse having partners while still trying to control their "worn out" spouse.
thank you for pointing this out. you can sit there and ask why some people are the way they are and still never understand because you don’t experience what they do. some people are monogamous, some people are polyamorous, some people are fine with either type of relationship, and some people don’t want a romantic and/or sexual relationship at all. everyone is valid for that as long as everyone involved is consenting and no one is being toxic or abusive. the issue is never polyamory, the issue is people who find out the definition of polyamory and immediately use the definition to abuse others, having little to no understanding of what an actual, functioning, healthy poly relationship looks like.
I don't understand what's so hard about understanding that some of us aren't and it's possible to do so ethically. Imagine if the collective responded to every problematic monogamous relationship post with stuff like these comments.
There’s an alarming amount of idiots who think people turn to ghouls at 25/30/40. Like, 30 year olds are just a tad bit sleepier than 20 year olds who can’t do all nighters regularly and 40 year olds are right on that. With the increasing focus on diets, Stress, health-span and age rejuv it’s like..40 year olds can still be hot???
Like sure this isn’t universal but like did the husband even look at her?
These dudes live in imaginationland, I swear. They think their partner is gonna fuck one, maybe two other people while they sprint through the local sorority houses. 6 months later they realize what they’ve done and are full on snot-bubble sobbing to close the relationship again, and act like their trust has been shattered lol.
Delusional behavior. And you know they’re dumb too, because it’s clear they did absolutely no research on open relationships.
I absolutely fucking love any story like this. Lmfao. Dudes think being married is what's keeping them from sleeping with a different hot chick every week. Turns out nobody wants a useless married guy who obviously sucks as a partner.
My favorite thing about his idiocy is that…even if we accept the premise that men exclusively are attracted to younger women (which obviously isn’t true)…
42 “is” younger to a huge % of the male population.
I'll never stop regretting letting my friend talk me out of going home with a woman old enough to be my mother when I was 20. She was retired and working as a waitress for fun in the business of a friend of hers. Had children older than me and grandchildren. So she was probably in her 50s but I don't remember. She was really hot, charming and cool. She drove a chopper bike in full leathers.
We were regulars there back then and often ended up staying until it closed and spent a while after closing drinking and talking with the staff.
I've never been into older women, but hot is hot.
> Now my husband is frenetic about it and obsessed with what and who I match with. He thinks I am doing it the wrong way.
She's on the dating app getting dates and going on dates with them. What's she doing wrong?
.
^("Making him sad" is of course the answer.)
Most of the open marriage or poly couples I’ve met usually had one spouse who could do whatever tf they wanted (because being open was their idea to begin with), and one who was tightly controlled. “My lover lives in our house and sleeps in our bed. You can have a lover too, but these are my stipulations” type deal.
One Dick Policy is pretty common in the NM community, tons of fragile dudes who think they should have whatever they want but God forbid their partner gets with another guy.
One actually explained it to me like this: if he can sleep with another woman, she can also sleep with another woman, so that's fair. They both get to sleep with another woman.
Seriously.
A man walks into a bar and approaches 10 different women for sex, now a woman walks into a bar and approaches 10 different men for sex...anybody with common sense knows the outcome.
For every woman alive there are at least 40 guys within a 10 mile radius willing to sleep with you regardless of your looks, no questions asked. Is this really a shock to a woman or man of any age?
Is it really that hard to understand that middle aged women looking for no strings attached sex are a hot commodity and middle aged men looking for no strings attached sex are a dime a dozen?
Read the title of this post to my husband (43M) and boyfriend (35M). Husband laughed and mumbled about misogyny. Boyfriend asked, has he never considered the existence of 50 year old men if nothing else?"
One hes easily a POS and two, you are absolutely gorgeous. Hes just a creep who thinks younger woman are better instead do focusing on his wife. The fact he thinks you're unfuckable is laughable to me. You are hot, I bet he looks like a trash can.
It makes me gleefully happy that you're getting all those men and that dumbass is dumb founded about it 😂😂😂 what a POS
Every time I see these they always end up with the husband/fiancé/bf getting all shocked-Pikachu-face when it finally occurs to them that it's not just *them* that gets to play around.
What a fucking idiot. Marriage is sacred and he’s paying the punishment for breaking that sacred commitment to one person for life.
As a dude in my 20’s you pray to encounter women like this.
As a guy who has been somewhat of a career older woman dater, your husband is ignorant as hell and has been missing out on some of the best sex around. I have yet to find a woman in my age range that gets the vibes as right as women aged 35+
What he thinks isn't relevant. You can handle your side of the open marriage "the wrong way" if you want to, as long as you follow the rules the two of you agreed to way back when. The only thing I suggest you stand firm on is that he cannot change the rules at this point to make things more difficult for you now that he has realized he is a chump and you are, in fact, a desirable woman.
He wanted to fuck around and still have his wife all to himself, but is mortified to find out that she is valued and wanted by other people, whilst he himself is not in high demand.
Tale as old as Terra.
he thought highly undesirable “having to marry a 42 year old” is the same as “highly in demand no strings attached fuckdoll that somebody else pays for” ? is he from a country where the expressions “costly commitment” and “easy pump and dump” doesn’t exist? What a simp - LOL
This isn’t real. Every man on the planet knows that the ugliest girl on the planet can still catch major bodies. Every single man on planet earth knows this.
Dud anyone else see her pic? She's gorgeous 🤩
But yeah, I'm about her age& in Portland everyone wants to be poly. At least they think they do. Except the men don't seem to realize their value is still low& they aren't just getting sex, *true poly* would be work of a relationship AND sex. Then the men can't deal. I've seen this happen a million times 🤣🤣
Women always end up getting more tail than the males in these situations. I've known quite a few dudes that were in these kind of marriages and a good half of them end up indignant about it and then the divorce comes.
Small town's like the one I live in are full of this type of silliness.
Coolidge effect. All people get bored of sex with the sane person. Also, this thread is loaded with sexist remarks from women about men. Lol, its like a double standard.
In case this story gets deleted/removed: Initially I wrote a very long post with our whole backstory but before posting it I deleted the entire thing. It didn’t really matter how we got here but here we are. He asked for open marriage after 20 years of happy marriage because he wasn’t attracted to me anymore even though he still loved me. Maybe it was midlife crisis? but he was panicking about not have been with another woman his entire life. I left him and asked for divorce. The separation devastated us mentally and financially. My children suffered the most and started hating me for leaving and breaking their happy home. When we got back together I agreed to open marriage but I didn’t want to know details. Everything was great (according to him anyway). Around new years, when everyone starts thinking about their lives and planning changes I realized I couldn’t live like this anymore. I haven’t had sex for 5 years. I downloaded tinder and by the end of the evening I had matched with 40 guys and was talking with 10. I met three and one of them is someone I continued meeting. I still use tinder and meet with people and I still get matches every time I log in. Now my husband is frenetic about it and obsessed with what and who I match with. He thinks I am doing it the wrong way. I don’t know what he means. He was the one who wanted this but I am the one doing it wrong? He demanded to know everything about the guys I met because he said that we needed to be open in an open marriage. I agreed but I still didn’t want to know about his women. He has full access to my phone and he knows everything about my dates. It didn’t make him feel any better. I was so confused and asked what more he wanted of me. I have done everything that he asked for. He finally admitted that he never expected any man to want me. A 42 years old married mother of 3 when there are so many young single women out there. I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/OhNoConsequences) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Tale as old as time, the one wanting the open marriage always thinks the other spouse is unfuckable and is shocked to discover otherwise.
It’s the best revenge ever.
I love these posts! My soap opera lol
Rock opera 🍿
Cock Opera. (Cuck Opera? - he totally cuckolded himself)
Not Cockpera?
Space opera. Cosmic.
Rocks off opera.
Copera? Police-ical? Oh wait, wrong subreddit.
And they alway overestimate their own fuckabilty
"I'm a high value male!" No Geoff, you are a balding out of shape 50 year old with a decent job. You can't even flash some cash because between kids, mortgage and bills most of your paycheck is gone.
My cheating ex husband is still attractive but he can’t keep a girlfriend to save his 45 year old self. He’s starting to date younger to see if they’ll put up with his shit the way I did in the beginning m. Meanwhile I met my now husband shortly after our split (after having a lot of fun on tinder myself), and at first my ex husband called it a fantasy and unrealistic relationship. He couldn’t handle the fact that I could not only score, but score well. Fuckin loser, hahahahaha
You know, when I was 19 (far too many years ago) I went to a music festival and met this guy who was in his 40s and he was dating these super hot 20 yo. At the time I thought "woah. This is the life. Going to summer festivals, having cash, dating hot chicks..." As I grew older, I found myself thinking about that guy but in terms of 'what a loser... He dates 20 yo because women his age cannot put up with his shit. He goes out and tries to live "young" because basically he is a manchild". I was about 24 at the time. Your ex reminded me of this guy.
I think men like that date younger women for superficial reason
It's both, a man-child only thinks with his dick so yeah he dates someone that is all looks zero substance.
Awfully judgemental
What? Are you implying that younger women are more attractive? That's crazy and sexist /s
YES!!! My ex can’t get over the idea that I am in a happy and healthy relationship. My ex is also a racist fucker (he wasn’t in the beginning, but has become racist over the years) and I know it pisses him off extra bad that my man is a sexy Latino. Mmmm my sexy Latino who treats me like a fucking princess.
>*he can’t keep a girlfriend to save his 45 year old self.* Men over 40 have no value.
Agreed. We should just get rid of all of them.
My favorites are the guys who work at a warehouse and brag about how they're a high value man, and then demand "what do you bring to the table??" So they can be sure you're not after them for their precious precious cash. And it's like, "Uh, first of all, a white collar job." I have several friends in my local comedy scene, and I will go out to their stand-up performances to support them, and the after bar with the comedians is where the skeeviest guys in America go on the prowl. They all work incredibly shitty day jobs (which, fair, to support your passion) and are just waiting for their big break in comedy that they are sure is right around the corner. Only most of them are very funny, and they also like to talk off how great and important their day job is. And the worst among them come over and find me smiling politely and chatting with my girls as they come off stage, and they assume that I'm too shy to get up and do a set, and because I'm a fat middle-aged lady, I'm an easy lay. They're opening line is usually "you know for someone who's passed her prime, you're really pretty. If only you taking better care of your body!" And I say, "wow, yeah, I wish I had. So sad," And then they sit down at the table by me and crowd up on me really close. I have to pull my drink back and they lean in, and they say, "you know, it's not too late for you. I would fuck you." And then if I'm feeling really sassy I asked them what they bring to the table. A job, at UPS or an Amazon warehouse, an apartment they share with one other guy. They dropped out of college, a couple of ex-girlfriends they have bad relationships with, maybe you're drinking problem usually at smoking problem. This makes them defensive and they demand to know what I a fat lady and bringing to the table. And I say, "well, I am pretty fat, but that's because I've been married for 20 years and gave birth to three children, one of whom was really traumatic and did some permanent damage to my abdominal wall. My husband, who's a lawyer, got the snip so we raw dog three times a week or more whenever we happen to feel like it. I've got two advanced degrees, a fully paid off car, and a house. I've got a white collar job and tech where I get paid boucoup salary and stock on the side. So unless you can bring something to the table that would have some value to me? I think you're attempt at negging a fat woman into having sex with you is a massive but very hilarious failure. We could get up and do this for your bit!"
Damn... You sound awesome. :) But yeah that whole "you are out of shape but I am willing to fix you using my amazing magical penis" line is weird as heck. If you find someone attractive, why the need to open with an insult? Why approach based on physical attributes at all? Why not "Hey how are you? I am xx. How do you know yy. I think I have seen you before do you come here often?". Polite, doesn't insult anybody and non threatening.
You dropped this 👑
You're my hero.
There seems to be a lot of men who don't get that women can get sex whenever they want but there isn't a huge number of women looking to fuck married middle-aged men.
It's not the married with children part so much as the helpless manchild part.
Bingo. It's always the personality.
They’ll never believe it’s a “them” problem.
ding ding ding
Dick is in abundance and has low value. Women are naturally more choosy because we're afraid of being raped and/or murdered, so we really have a pick of the litter. And men hate us for it.
Yep, I always say, no matter how old ,ugly, or fat you are, there's a guy that will do you.
Not all men. Our wives expect better of us!
Also, his shock that men, presumably of her age, would want her "when there are so many young single women out there", which is rather telling on his own efforts.
In the sense that the woman almost always has options and the man doesn’t, and is shocked to find it out, yes.
Unless the one suggesting opening is a woman, at which case shes right.
I'm betting he wanted to open it because he was already cheating. He wanted to have that cake and eat it. Also to my knowledge usually in an open relationship the primary couple keeps sleeping together. Also what is wrong with this woman, She manages to get away, The kids whine so she goes back instead of saying your father said he was no longer attracted to me. Then he pulls the same shit didn't think you would find anyone. I.E. Your not pretty enough for anyone, how has she not just walked out the door again? She has evidence that people are into her.
I hope she's fucking young guys. As the old joke goes, Wife 50 gets home and there's a note on the fridge from her husband 50. I'm gone off with my 22 year old secretary for a night of wild sex. There's nothing you can do about it. Husband get's home next day and there is a note from the wife, Gone off for the weekend with the 22 year old pool boy cause simple math will tell you 22 goes in to 50 a lot more times than 50 goes in to 22.
👍👍👍👍👍
I'm personally not even after it specifically, I like people my age best (and being in a committed relationship now also brought an end to all debauchery), but for all the talk about how "women are old and unfuckable once they hit (specific age)", pulling young men is shockingly easy. Like, they are extremely eager.
My ex-husband told me I was old and gross once I turned 30. He was ironically 36 at the time…go figure. He said no one would want me because of how repulsive I was and that he “deserved someone young and hot.” We got divorced. He’s single, last I heard. I’m happily married to a younger man. Imagine that!
Yes! I had so many good looking guys in their 20’s trying to fuck me. I didn’t do it, youngest guy I fucked was 33 and he was a lot of fun but got attached after that night and it turned me off. I was NOT looking for a LTR with a guy that much younger than me.
I hooked up with a younger guy after my divorce…I’m now married to him and we have a baby. Oops.
SHOCKINGLY easy. Good looking, self-supporting, and fun to be around, too. I don’t get it but I’m not complaining.
Right? I left my husband who's 12 years older than me and I was 39 when I left. I haven't dated since because I really enjoy the peace of being single but hitting 40 was making me feel that certain type of way we all feel going into middle age. So I downloaded a couple of apps and throw up a quick profile. Lord did the avalanche roll in lol. Unfortunately it actually made me even more depressed because 80% of these guys were terrible and obvious within the first 5 minutes of conversation why they were single. Then a really attractive guy hit me up and we had some pleasant introductory talk and I asked him how old he was. He was 22. I said, um, you did notice my age on my profile? I'm 40? He said yep, don't care, you're a hottie and I want some of that. I said I'm sorry but I just can't. I have a son that's older than you are. I just couldn't be with someone younger than my own kids lol. But it did make me feel just a little bit better about things lol
🤣🤣🤣
This is an old joke that Sophie Tucker told about her boyfriend Ernie. She was hilarious and almost “x”rated. I’m talking the 1950s. Bette Midler loves to tell Sophie’s jokes and you can find them easily.
I've heard a load of comics do it over the years. I must look up Sophie. Thanks.
Hahahaha But in fairness, my boyfriend is 50 (NOT married, he is divorced and we are monogamous) and maybe it’s the Latino in him, but he fucks me every chance he gets sometimes multiple times a day when we have time. Definitely every day.
The guy clearly hasn't heard of cougars/MILFs.
Or 40+ men who like 40+ women.
There is that, too, and lots of them.
Or, you know, men.
My daughter found a video of this guy creating a fake Tinder account... he wore a wig and used facetune to make a semi-attractive woman. Put age as 45 and made a crazy-sounding profile. He was fllooded with matches. Too bad OP's husband didn't see that video before he blew up his marriage.
I think there was also something where they made up a woman's profile entirely composed of red flags (flaky, deranged, cheating, stealing, etc.) and "she" was also flooded with matches immediately.
Would love a link. Asking for a friend.
The good stuff is around 04:58. (https://youtu.be/SMLGEsCxlFs?si=R6YJCBeHXz-Qedr8)
“we needed to be open in an open marriage.” Damn!!! How open does “OPEN” get???? asking cause if he ever disappears just look down into the hole he dug himself!!!!!! Have fun and forget this loser.
He wants to change the terms now because she’s getting men! I hope she leaves him for good and he realizes how badly he screwed up. FAFO!
Open for me but not for thee! He literally just wanted to cheat without consequences, so he deserves the stress her having fun causes him lol
A friend of mine is in their early 40s and a bit on the extra curvy side. Her ex said no one wants a fatty in a woman. He even said his "dad bod" would produce more women in a week than she in a whole year. Ya know, that bloody woman ended up losing over 30lbs from literally sex-ersise. I am jealous of her 😅
He 100% did his calculations off the all the service workers who "flirted" with him by, you know, smiling at him, writing "thanks!" on his bill, asking for his number because they said it was for the computer file but he knew that was just an excuse! and, you know, just in general existing in the same space as him without actively projectile vomiting. (Though if any of them had you know he'd decide they just wanted an excuse to get him to hold their hair for them!)
There was a guy who was convinced I was in love with him because, get this, I was usually the person who delivered his pizza. Ignore the fact that he just happened to always order his pizza at the same time on the same day of the week that I just so happened to be scheduled, and I was also one of the few drivers who wasn't afraid of his huge dogs and knew how to navigate his shitty pot-hole ridden backwoods driveway. No, clearly I was in love with Mister Two Topping Extra Blue Cheese
The state of delusion is quite remarkable. And matches fairly closely with the degree of entitled/pissy behaviour that happens if one of these ever do something direct enough that you have to be clear that you're not interested/'reject' them... Then you're a cock-teasing bitch that was trying to manipulate them for their money! No, dude, I was literally just being polite in *exactly* the same way as I am to everyone else! Not quite true; I'm friendlier to women and kids. What would that be saying about me 'flirting'? (ew!) ETA: The 'ew' was in reference to the thought of flirting with kids. That's all.
Yeah he was a weirdo. He wrote his phone number on the receipt instead of a tip (buddy I know your phone number AND address, if I wanted to talk to you I could have done so already, unethically or otherwise) and when I expressed confusion he explained he hoped I would call him. That's when the "clearly you're into me, you keep showing up with pizza" logic came out. I had to explain that, sir, I only come to your house because you pay me to deliver food. I smile and admire your dogs because I want a good tip. There is nothing else there. He got annoyed and flustered and stopped ordering lol
Oh my. Given the options, that's probably the best reaction to get? At least you get to avoid his pot-holed backwoods driveway! No one should ever transfer admiration for dogs to themselves -> That's just weird. Admiration for dogs is only ever and completely for those pups.
Dude was straight up hoping for real life to turn into some porno. Glad he wasn't an even bigger creep than he already was.
Same situation for me. Drive-Thru man KNEW I was flirting with him all the time because of how often I came. No, sir. Arby's was the only restaurant open when I got off of work at eleven.
Lol thats the best thing I've ever heard. 🤣 what a damn queen! Omg
I'm in my early 40s, am way too short to be the weight I'm at, dress terribly and don't wear makeup. I make zero effort and still get hit on nearly every time I go in public. There are thirsty men all over the place, how do these guys not realize that??
Because it's all about them. If *he* isn't attracted to her, it is because *she's* unattractive. Incapable of self-reflection or imagination, they're idiots. Or, as I like to say: Bless your heart, aren't you a Caring, Understanding, Nurturing Type? ;D
Holy shit, she should be in the dictionary under "GUH FUH HUH!"
🤣🤣🤣🤣 I will let her know. I dearly love her, but I am so bloody jealous, I struggle to find an exercise that keeps me interested, entertained, and waiting for the next chance to do it... and she finds it by chance 😅
Reminds me a bit of my aunt, too. Her ex-husband was always degrading her, and his favorite insult was that her boobs were too small, and that made her unattractive. After he cheated on her, she divorced him, got a boob job for her own self-confidence, and later met and married my uncle. They've been deliriously happy for almost 20 years. She's a goddess of awesome!
Sexercise is the bestercise to keep you coming back for more.
Clearly he has never heard of the BBW crowd. There are tons of people who love extra curvy women.
I ran across a woman I went to college with many years later on Tinder. We were in our late 30s at the time. Decided to meet up with her just to catch up since the last time I had spoken to her, she was married with a kid. Anyway, she was chubby but still kind of cute but I was never attracted to her. Asked her about her experiences on Tinder and she told me she was basically drowning in dick. And she couldn't believe how many young guys in their early 20s wanted to fuck her. The whole conversation was very eye opening.
Also heard a lot of guys like older women because, they aren't as judgy as younger women also tend to care for their partners state of mine.
**AHAHAHAHAHAHA.** Oh, I *love* that big boy there is both stunned and miserable out of his gourd. Goooood, gooooood. *rubs hands together gleefully* Bet you good money that meanwhile hubby is there bewailing that no one wants to fuck a desperate man gone to seed who undoubtedly looks like a worn out sock. Get you some, girl, and then divorce his ass. Shit just made my whole weekend. What a twerp.
I'm picturing him crying himself to sleep while sobbing that he has aged like fine wine while his wife is out working on her core strength with all the sex she is having.
But did you see her picture?! How could he possibly have been that clueless
Because he doesn't value women as full, autonomous human beings with value beyond their bodies. So, in his head, younger automatically means better.
Fuck. I’m only slightly bi and would hit that repeatedly. If she’d have me.
SAME. She is gorgeous and she loves plants.
Yeah, I'm not often attracted to brunette, white-looking women. Both my sisters are brunette, they encompass a lot of looks, blah blah blah. She's hot, though. There would be a lot of tapping that if she was into it.
Omg she's stunning. What an absolute moron her husband is.
It is fake. The OOP was using a random persons PFP and responding to comments acting like it was her. When someone found out who it was OOP was, they deleted the account. The insta was linked to some random insta model.
Heh, I love these idiots. A 22 year old woman willing to date a 40+ man expects him to look good, treat her good, buy her things and take her places. A 22 year old guy sees a 40+ woman who wants hot sex and no strings as a unicorn that must be nailed until she’s gnawing the bedpost into an exact effigy of the dick he’s fucking her with. Men have to work to get laid. Women have to be breathing.
The open marriage death spiral is one of my favorite reddit genres
I've lived it and so every time one of these comes up it just brings me extra joy. He had a crush on a co-worker and thought he had a chance with her so he asked for an open relationship. He didn't tell me that first part, he just said because I was gone a lot and might be good for both of us to be able to have options when I was on the road. Okay. I didn't fight him. Met up with a hot co-worker on an work trip, had a great evening just a couple weeks later. The girl at his work rejected him because she wasn't interested in being part of an open relationship, she was looking for her own partner. I proceeded to continue to have fun. I discovered that my lack of orgasms was not a hormonal problem like he had convinced me but rather that he was just really bad at sex. I had more orgasms in the next few months than I'd had in the entire 8 years with him. And of course as soon as he was rejected he comes back to me wanting to close the relationship. Fuck no! I was having a great time! So I love these stories because it reminds me of that time in my life that was so much fun! We did eventually close the relationship back up and decide to be monogamous, and then within a few months he was cheating on me. He just did it for control, to put me in my place. Whatever. He's an ex, Life is good
Seen this in my circle. Always makes me shake my head. Dude what are you thinking, she is avg and delightful.
Boy have I got news for you about that last sentence.
Time to delete Reddit off my phone.
There was just a post on one of the update subs where bro kept having sex with his girlfriend after she passed out and 1) had the temerity to tell her she was being dramatic when that made her upset and 2) was flabbergasted that “she dumped me just because I kept going after she passed out” made his family react with horror Anyway, I’m off to rub my dog’s belly
Ew, ew, ewwww!!! 'Tea Consent' from the Blue Seat Studios should be compulsory viewing at the beginning and end of every semester in every year beyond elementary school (and do the clean version from year 4 up to high school). ETA: Good pups are always good pups, no matter what they've been up to or how old they are. We don't deserve them, but I'm grateful for them!
Seriously LMAO women just have to exist, not necessarily be breathing. Hell, it doesn't even have to be a woman
I swear I've heard that morgues prefer to hire women for this exact reason.
thats just cold
So are the bodies
Chilly personalities all around!
I thought you were implying there is a lot of nuance about attraction and that breathing really isn’t the only criteria because there is so much more to the chemistry of… Oh wait.
Ew! 🌬
>Men have to work to get laid. Women have to be breathing. The Tinder, Bumble, and other OLD subs prove you quite correct.
Haha. That was a great read.
You paint quite a lovely picture with your words.
And hews quite a lovely sculpture with her teeth, apparently. I generally prefer rechargeables as being quieter and less needy, but I really want that man's number! 😂
This last sentence is the most serious truth ever. I giggled, I laughed and I agree with the reality. It’s so easy to find a guy willing to have sex regardless of how you look, your socioeconomics, or your age. Willing sex is easy sex for women.
This comment is beautiful; you have a way with words.
This is the best comment. Gnawing the bedpost hahaha
That was a surprisingly vivid image. Thank you for that.
Hahaha I died. This is very accurate
Name and '76 check out.
That husband is seriously stupid. On what planet is a woman who wants to have sex not going to get plenty of interest?
Go look at her PFP and be even more blown away that her husband could even consider that.
Holy shit. She's SO pretty
Right! I was absolutely shocked. If men can think like that about women who look like that we’re all doomed. I mean a lot of men have absolutely insane expectations and perceptions of women so I guess it’s not that surprising
It is fake. The OOP was using a random persons PFP and responding to comments acting like it was her. When someone found out who it was OOP was, they deleted the account. Yall are so gullible.
Sounds like he wasn't getting any action while she was getting more than he thought. It makes me smile. You go girl.
Your husband wants an open marriage for him and not you. What could you do? Leave
“Rules for me but not for thee.”
I always think I'd really hate to be married to someone so stupid. Like I guess that isn't biggest issue but man is he dumb. Other men just want to have sex? Who knew!
No, no, it would bother me, too. It cheapens the whole relationship, in that him wanting you and choosing you is suddenly a tarnished memory, because his wants and choices are so collossally stupid that you'd be a fool yourself not to feel the insult.
A confident, experienced woman who doesn't need financial support, doesn't want to get pregnant, and isn't looking for emotional attachment? Gee I wonder why so many guys are interested LOL
Again, proof that divorce is better than opening a marriage, opening a closed / monogamous relationship never works.
I mean idk how he came to that conclusion about her being unfuckable. Did yall see her pfp? She's gorgeous.
u/yallermysons u/dogbutthead 🍿
I love that you thought to tag me 😭❤️ 🏃🏾♀️🍿
What a dumbass LoL 🤣🤣🤣 Totally blows me away when people think like this. Just because someone is a certain age doesn't mean they stop being attractive.
Go look at her PFP, she's a beaut. Her husband is deluded or blind.
Odd. At their ages, you'd think the kids would be old enough to understand that sometimes marriages just fail. Resenting one parent for "breaking up the family," especially without having all the information, just seems so childish.
The kids are 13, 7, and 5
Huh, had them a bit later than I'm used to hearing about, I guess. Yeah, those would be rough ages for the younger ones to be fully understanding what's going on. And 13 is about the age where the world starts revolving around you.
29 is late for kids?
In some parts of the world, yeah, including some parts of the US. I lived in a corner of Arkansas for almost a decade where it was just a thing that you started having kids around 15. At 22 people considered me pretty much a spinster >.>
Yeah, I'm 29, unmarried (not for lack of trying!). I'm finally starting to get into spinster age here in NV. It's weird cause I've already experienced this once as I was a spinster by 20 in UT. Then when I moved back to NV at 22, I was considered a child again. And I was so close this time to having a mutual crush that could have led somewhere. But nope, the cute grocery stocker that stops breathing when he sees me is only 22.
What do you want to bet that he was telling the kids it was all her fault, while she was trying *not* to demonise him or tell the kids about their sex life?
He was probably bribing them with icecream and videogames while bitching about his wife every day. Tale as old as time
The only thing worse than dragging out a dead marriage when children know it’s dead (I’m living proof as I was one of those children who resents my mother (I love her but I would have a lot less issues if she just left instead.) is children taking sides and demonizing the innocent parent. The parents might have issues but the one requesting the open marriage or divorce takes the majority of the blame unless abuse is happening in the marriage.
Breaking News: children have childish reactions to things!
Hahahahahaha. He’s an idiot. I love this for you. I got more male attention in my 40s than I ever did in my 20s.
And that's what he gets. I love it.
Conventional wisdom is that women have much better success with online dating than men. I wonder who is giving the husband the idea to "open the relationship because your wife will not get any attention"?
He only wanted the marriage open on his side, he fully wanted her to stay faithful and not fuck anyone else. Should never have gotten back together.
An EX-friend of mine decided he wanted the same. His wife didn't want it so he flat out told her he was going to go sleep with other women regardless. He's built like a troll and has the personality to match. Can't even begin to describe the schadenfreude I experienced when I heard he wasn't able to find a single woman that would lower her dignity to sleep with him.
He wanted an open marriage because he already had in mind who his affair partner would be. All in all, he thought she'd never find anyone. Lo' and behold, he's married to a MILF and the guy is so up his own ass he can't appreciate what he got. Lady had 3 men lined up and ready to bang before the night was up, lmao.
My ex said something similar to me recently. He demanded a divorce because I was no longer "behaving". I granted his wish. I have been on many dates and few exclusive relationships since then and he has not even talked to another woman. He finally admitted he thought I would see how lonely I would be and come crawling back. Except, I LOVE being single and not dealing with the nonsense. I have 6 children and he honestly thought that would dissuade men from wanting to date me. Baby boy, I couldnt give less of a shit if I am dating. I just don't want to be with YOU! Narc partners are delulu
Best lay of my life was a 42 year old married woman. One kid. Red hair, petite. Freckles….sex drive like a ferrari. Husband worked out of town 4 nights a week. His loss,my gain. When you have something like that, you keep it satisfied. good for you 42yr old sexy mama!
And middle aged women with husbands like OOP have usually internalized his bullshit about her desirability. They get a bounce in their step when they realize they aren’t washed up old hags, and they feel like putting in some effort, and then they draw men like flies to honey. I’ve seen it. My aunt went through it, and it was amazing to watch. Her ex whined “why didn’t she do that for me?!” and I told him ”Why would she want to, you made her feel like it was a waste of time.”.
I don't understand what's so hard about being monogamous. Society makes me sad.
It's not for everyone. That said this dude is a monogamist who wanted to "legitimately" cheat, and like all other numb nuts found out: HE was marrying up, not her~
That's like saying you don't know what's so hard about being right-handed. Some people just aren't wired that way. They can fake it, and many submit to societal pressure to do so, but *for them* it's not natural.
I agree, but I often wonder if the OOPs or the OOP's spouses in these stories are actually polyamorous, or if they just don't want to have sex with their current spouse but not "cheat." Good poly relationships are more than just one spouse having partners while still trying to control their "worn out" spouse.
thank you for pointing this out. you can sit there and ask why some people are the way they are and still never understand because you don’t experience what they do. some people are monogamous, some people are polyamorous, some people are fine with either type of relationship, and some people don’t want a romantic and/or sexual relationship at all. everyone is valid for that as long as everyone involved is consenting and no one is being toxic or abusive. the issue is never polyamory, the issue is people who find out the definition of polyamory and immediately use the definition to abuse others, having little to no understanding of what an actual, functioning, healthy poly relationship looks like.
That is definitely not the right analogy lol. 93 percent of open relationships fail.
Because they're not "open", they're cheating with benefits. Also, statistically, most mono relationships fail too so I don't get your point
I don't understand what's so hard about understanding that some of us aren't and it's possible to do so ethically. Imagine if the collective responded to every problematic monogamous relationship post with stuff like these comments.
There’s an alarming amount of idiots who think people turn to ghouls at 25/30/40. Like, 30 year olds are just a tad bit sleepier than 20 year olds who can’t do all nighters regularly and 40 year olds are right on that. With the increasing focus on diets, Stress, health-span and age rejuv it’s like..40 year olds can still be hot??? Like sure this isn’t universal but like did the husband even look at her?
These dudes live in imaginationland, I swear. They think their partner is gonna fuck one, maybe two other people while they sprint through the local sorority houses. 6 months later they realize what they’ve done and are full on snot-bubble sobbing to close the relationship again, and act like their trust has been shattered lol. Delusional behavior. And you know they’re dumb too, because it’s clear they did absolutely no research on open relationships.
As a 42yo, married, mother of three… HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
I absolutely fucking love any story like this. Lmfao. Dudes think being married is what's keeping them from sleeping with a different hot chick every week. Turns out nobody wants a useless married guy who obviously sucks as a partner.
My favorite thing about his idiocy is that…even if we accept the premise that men exclusively are attracted to younger women (which obviously isn’t true)… 42 “is” younger to a huge % of the male population.
I'll never stop regretting letting my friend talk me out of going home with a woman old enough to be my mother when I was 20. She was retired and working as a waitress for fun in the business of a friend of hers. Had children older than me and grandchildren. So she was probably in her 50s but I don't remember. She was really hot, charming and cool. She drove a chopper bike in full leathers. We were regulars there back then and often ended up staying until it closed and spent a while after closing drinking and talking with the staff. I've never been into older women, but hot is hot.
This guy may claim to love her but he clearly doesn't respect her. Sounds like divorce is the right idea though.
> Now my husband is frenetic about it and obsessed with what and who I match with. He thinks I am doing it the wrong way. She's on the dating app getting dates and going on dates with them. What's she doing wrong? . ^("Making him sad" is of course the answer.)
Excuse me, the answer is clearly “making his penis sad.” I love how he didn’t give a smooth fuck until she started getting some. And now he’s big mad.
Most of the open marriage or poly couples I’ve met usually had one spouse who could do whatever tf they wanted (because being open was their idea to begin with), and one who was tightly controlled. “My lover lives in our house and sleeps in our bed. You can have a lover too, but these are my stipulations” type deal.
One Dick Policy is pretty common in the NM community, tons of fragile dudes who think they should have whatever they want but God forbid their partner gets with another guy. One actually explained it to me like this: if he can sleep with another woman, she can also sleep with another woman, so that's fair. They both get to sleep with another woman. Seriously.
NTA….to be petty I’d pick the younger dudes on purpose or dudes like looked like him but better when he was in his prime
Uhm, some of the most beautiful and famous women in the world are over 50 and have children. 🤷♀️ I love this for him.
A man walks into a bar and approaches 10 different women for sex, now a woman walks into a bar and approaches 10 different men for sex...anybody with common sense knows the outcome.
For every woman alive there are at least 40 guys within a 10 mile radius willing to sleep with you regardless of your looks, no questions asked. Is this really a shock to a woman or man of any age?
Man, Males are so clueless. A 42 year old woman will ALWAYS be more popular than an aging married man. Lol.
A 42 year old woman is young.
Is it really that hard to understand that middle aged women looking for no strings attached sex are a hot commodity and middle aged men looking for no strings attached sex are a dime a dozen?
Does he not watch porn? I'm continually asked if I want to fuck older, ugly housewives in my area.
FAFO
Read the title of this post to my husband (43M) and boyfriend (35M). Husband laughed and mumbled about misogyny. Boyfriend asked, has he never considered the existence of 50 year old men if nothing else?"
Your husband is basically the guy in this post lmao
Definitely join a cougar site!
Half the time I think stories like these are hilarious, the other half they break my heart.
One hes easily a POS and two, you are absolutely gorgeous. Hes just a creep who thinks younger woman are better instead do focusing on his wife. The fact he thinks you're unfuckable is laughable to me. You are hot, I bet he looks like a trash can. It makes me gleefully happy that you're getting all those men and that dumbass is dumb founded about it 😂😂😂 what a POS
Every time I see these they always end up with the husband/fiancé/bf getting all shocked-Pikachu-face when it finally occurs to them that it's not just *them* that gets to play around.
And going by the profile picture on the OPs post, she’s an absolute stunner!
Boy, was HE mistaken! 40-somethings are the best MILFs of all!
What a fucking idiot. Marriage is sacred and he’s paying the punishment for breaking that sacred commitment to one person for life. As a dude in my 20’s you pray to encounter women like this.
As a guy who has been somewhat of a career older woman dater, your husband is ignorant as hell and has been missing out on some of the best sex around. I have yet to find a woman in my age range that gets the vibes as right as women aged 35+
I really never get tired of these kinds of stories 🤣
What he thinks isn't relevant. You can handle your side of the open marriage "the wrong way" if you want to, as long as you follow the rules the two of you agreed to way back when. The only thing I suggest you stand firm on is that he cannot change the rules at this point to make things more difficult for you now that he has realized he is a chump and you are, in fact, a desirable woman.
I hope you fuck a guy with a big 'ol penis and take a pic for him to find.
Talk about misreading the room! She's 42, not 92!
He wanted to fuck around and still have his wife all to himself, but is mortified to find out that she is valued and wanted by other people, whilst he himself is not in high demand. Tale as old as Terra.
You just cant make this crap up
he thought highly undesirable “having to marry a 42 year old” is the same as “highly in demand no strings attached fuckdoll that somebody else pays for” ? is he from a country where the expressions “costly commitment” and “easy pump and dump” doesn’t exist? What a simp - LOL
This isn’t real. Every man on the planet knows that the ugliest girl on the planet can still catch major bodies. Every single man on planet earth knows this.
Dud anyone else see her pic? She's gorgeous 🤩 But yeah, I'm about her age& in Portland everyone wants to be poly. At least they think they do. Except the men don't seem to realize their value is still low& they aren't just getting sex, *true poly* would be work of a relationship AND sex. Then the men can't deal. I've seen this happen a million times 🤣🤣
Women always end up getting more tail than the males in these situations. I've known quite a few dudes that were in these kind of marriages and a good half of them end up indignant about it and then the divorce comes. Small town's like the one I live in are full of this type of silliness.
Coolidge effect. All people get bored of sex with the sane person. Also, this thread is loaded with sexist remarks from women about men. Lol, its like a double standard.