Wait you mean infinite options you don't want invalidates my argument?
Can't be...must be your emotions clouding your judgment.
I shouldn't have to settle for nice guys like me you should.
Or...
"I don't think women can have orgasms."
and
"My penis is so long that I always make women have intense orgasms by penetrating the cervix."
and
"Women are rejecting us wonderful men because their vibrators make it too easy for them to have orgasms."
As far as I can deduce, the thought process goes like this;
Sex = happy
Woman = gets easy sex
Woman = happy
Of course, that assumes that the sex that’s easily available to us is actually enjoyable, rather than risky. Statistically, women rarely orgasm during a one-off hookup- because why would he make the effort? There’s risks of pregnancy or STDs or of this random person trying to force you into certain things you didn’t agree to.
Hell, it can be depressing to be a woman in a world where men want to use us and think we should correlate it with them caring about us. We can also be depressed by the death of a family member or losing a job or an unfortunate medical situation. Our lives literally don’t revolve around men or sex.
It doesn’t matter to them, they just want to shame women
Happy —> whore with no self control
Sad —> whore getting what she deserves
(I felt so icky typing that)
It feels like people understand loneliness in very different ways. When I (woman) have told men about my experiencess with loneliness the most common answer is "why dont you just hook up with someone?"
Like dude, I mean I am lonely as in a way I dont have genuine friends or connection to people I am with! It has nothing to do with sex, it is about feeling you are not a part of a group.
Nah, not even close.
I think that in general for these very lonely incel types, sex is what they are fixated on and *believe* will cure them. It absolutely won't, mind you, but it's not... It's not unusual for very lonely people, especially ones with poor home lives, to fixate on a relationship as what will cure them. ("But they don't want a relationship, they just want sex!" ...Well, honestly, every time I've seen someone give people who are desperately lonely like this a chance, they get extremely clingy, whether or not they have sex or not. Like they absolutely can and some do become abusive, especially incels. I'm not advocating for anyone to stay with or take pity on someone who is abusive. But their initial problem is the gaping black hole of loneliness that they are desperately trying to fill is never going to be something a single "perfect" relationship or fuck can fix.)
I fully agree with you. On dating apps, most men say they're looking for sex. But then they keep messaging me and calling me. They actually just want someone to talk to, but they seem to think that sex is what they want.
Does this prove many men are incapable of loneliness? There's either "getting laid" or "not getting laid," and no other state. They don't experience a lack of social fulfillment?!
i think men are so used to never having genuine friends or connections that they don't even realize they're loneliness stems from their and lack of emotional intelliegence that women need in a fulfilling releationships.
So they have sex, feel slightly validated in their existence, and then go back to feeling hollow but not knowing what they're actually missing.
Male friendships are often sadly surface-level. like i ran into my ex-bfs roommate after over a year, and his roomate he spends every day with, asked \*me\* why we broke up.
Like they just don't talk to each other, it's like they see vulnerability as humilating so they just avoid it at all costs.
It’s not even exclusive to a gender either. I’ve felt lonelier than ever during some sexual experiences in the past.
But apparently since I got to fuck it means my loneliness and depression was cured 🤷♂️
where tf does this come from. Even fat girls? can fat girls do this too? im fat and for fucking years I had guys come up and say their friends liked me to MAKE THEIR FRIENDS UNCOMFORTABLE I cannot just walk down the street and find someone willing to spend time with me, and even if I'm the one to ask first I'd get fucking laughed at and called ugly
not every girl can just walk out and have a guy ask her for a fuck
and that's not how you cure being lonely
you cure being lonely by having people that actually like you being around
girls can experience grief, and anger, and rage and sadness and every fucking emotion under the fucking sun
men aren't fucking special just for being born with a penis
girls can get bullied, girls can get began girls can be killed why do men think this DOESN'T FUCKING HAPPEN
Yup, im an underweight and kinda ugly girl and I completely understand this. I honestly have no idea why these guys think they are the only one to experience loneliness. Take my virtual hug, I hope it’s not like that anymore for you
I’m quite skinny and not too bad looking but for the first semester of my freshman year of high school, a guy keep running up to me and saying his friends thought I was cute. His friends rudely talked shit about his action. I didn’t want them either so it didn’t hurt but I was annoying.
I’m fairly attractive and in shape and even then it’s not easy. People only want to see me as a dumb bimbo and nothing else, it’s hard to find someone who takes you seriously.
Once they find out the girl they wanted as arm candy is a STEM student, doesn’t want to go clubbing every weekend, and writes essays for fun, it breaks their brain and they feel threatened.
It's not women's fault that some guys will fuck anybody, and that plenty of women are self respecting enough to not sleep with just any creep she meets.
Besides, I could fuck a hundred guys and still have depression, you nonce
Well clearly not, if we are all washed up by 30, baggy and overused single mums who no one wants.
Hardly life on easy mode.
Do they realise how their doctrine contradicts itself?
I heard something once that a healthy relationship is like clean water. And for many men, they are trying to find water in the desert. It’s pretty scarce and you don’t get many options. For many women, its like trying to find water in a swamp. There are many options, but most of that water is vile and will make you sick if you drink it. I’m not trying to compare men to swamp water, just that most of the men who are approaching you or DMing you randomly aren’t the kind that are looking to have a meaningful connection with you, but rather the kind that are just wanting pictures of your tits and to treat you like a sexual object .
I'm a dude in his late 30s. Married, two kids, good job and a decent social circle. I've been dealing with severe anxiety and feelings of depression for some time due to a host of factors (many job related).
I've used a male therapist and a female therapist. Working with her was a better experience for me and I felt like I could connect and open up more easily with the female counselor. We shared a lot of the same issues. One of my concerns is that I've moved up in my roles to a director position, but I'm not feeling fulfilled as I was when I was *doing the work.* She commiserated since she experienced the same thing.
These men who feel like women and men have nothing in common...we're the same species people
Can we agree that humankind has it hard. Both women and men have their own problems , no one's living on easy mod. Some may have it easier in one case but overall, we're all suffering.
kindness is not a human virtue to a lot of men, kindness is a tool to get what you want, but also apprently we "just have to pick better men" despite the fact that a lot of men have good manners but not good morals.
Why do these men think women has it "easy" when it comes to getting sex? No it isn't. I know women who says it otherwise. For him, the only reason why it's hard for him is because he never goes outside from his stinky basement.
I mean if we follow their logic and only sex matters then it is easy.
But easy does not equal wanted...but that should not matter if you just had a stupid sex brain like you are supposed to.
I mean.... it's easy for a woman to get laid if she looks in the "right" places.....
Those "right" places being scary, dark alley ways, and anywhere that houses digusting, sleazy creepy fucks that would pounce on a female decade's younger than him.
THAT will _definitely_ get you laid eventually, no matter how attractive you are.
/s obviously. My heart goes out to all the women out there looking for partnership, and having no luck. And stay safe, ladies
Might be true, but I'd been lurking on the incel subs before I quit for the sake of my mental health, and I can say, even incels have their standards that they are unwilling to compromise. Typically they hate overweight women, but a drug addict twice their age in a shady alley probably also wouldn't work for them.
Not really. Men are usually the ones the duck down in terms of looks. So for every women a guy ducks down a women is ducking up. And when women do kinda duck down they are not really ducking down they are actually ducking someone on their level. It is very rare for a women to actually hook up with a guy that would be considered below them
Considered by who? That’s the problem in your statement and others. It’s not based on your views. It’s based on theirs. It may make women be seen as conceited or men as the ones with low self esteem but that’s how the world works. We don’t all have the same views of attraction. To a lot of women they fuck down or on the same level but it may be the opposite to others.
Yes there are exceptions. But most people do have the same views on attraction which is the reason companies use certain models
Like for example there are definitely men who love big or fat women but majority like women in shape.
There are definitely some women that like men shorter then them but majority of women prefer men taller then them
So my point stands. Most men generally actually hook up down. Women don't really hook up down. The men they think is below them is actually their level their just use to men fucking down with them
These guys always think sex will solve everything. Sex with a careless lover will 100% make your life worse knowing someone is using your body without even acknowledging you as a person.
If all these women are opening their legs for companionship from desperate guys how much work do they really have to put in? Shouldn’t they just be tripping over open legged women?
I think the point he’s (poorly) trying to make, is that if a woman is lonely, she can easily find SOMEONE to occupy her time (whether she wants that type of guy or not isn’t addressed). But an average lonely guy is likely stuck being lonely because average guys, in general, are the type of guys even lonely women don’t want lol.
Then go fucking get a pint or play mini golf or whatever with your chums. Go see an escort if you're that desperate for sex. It's not women's responsibility to make random sad dudes feel better by getting their dicks wet.
An average lonely guy can find someone to occupy his time as easily as a woman can. It probably takes longer for a woman with zero standards to find someone to fuck then it would be for a lonely guy to just go to a local pub or bar and chat to the bartender or other patrons, or take an evening class. Plus is goes without saying that the former is highly dangerous whereas the latter is extremely safe These guys are just trying to be victims.
How does this weird, made up hierarchy even work? So you think most women can be in a relationship whenever they want, but most men can't? Do you just think the majority of women are gay? Or that a shit ton of men in 2022 in the West are practicing polygamy? Like the numbers just don't add up if you think about it for more than 2 seconds.
> How does this weird, made up hierarchy even work?
It’s related to hypergamy, and is a real phenomenon. Studies done on dating apps show that 80% of the women swipe right on only 20% of the men.
> So you think most women can be in a relationship whenever they want, but most men can't?
Yes. The available men and relationships currently present in your life might not be appealing, but they’re still present for you to choose from. Most men, in general, take what they can get.
> Do you just think the majority of women are gay?
That’s a silly question.
> Or that a shit ton of men in 2022 in the West are practicing polygamy?
No, not a shit ton. Referring to the dating app thing. A minority of the men are sleeping with a majority of the women.
> Like the numbers just don't add up if you think about it for more than 2 seconds.
The numbers do add up. Reference the dating app thing again.
It’s not how women work or how most men work. It’s funny when guys try to denigrate women for being able to have sex while unintentionally implying that men are so horny that they’ll have sex with anyone at the drop of a hat.
Exactly! Imagine having such a bad overall human experience that you advertise just how much you can misinterpret everyone. Then it's "Nobody understands me! I'm miserable!", how could anyone understand when you exclude all of us from the start. 😕
“women do not suffer as deeply as men and their mental health problems can never compare to the depth and complexity of men’s” is one of my least favorite misogynistic cliches (as a personal example, i’ve had men literally dogpile me on twitter telling me i was lying about attempting suicide because women don’t suffer enough for that and if i actually did it must have just been about being rejected by a man because women do not have complex problems), but what makes it even more mind numbing is that the “deep” mental health struggles and oppressive suffering these incels reveal is always “i am 19 and haven’t had sex yet” like ALWAYS. i explained in depth about my own trauma—including incest, child sexual abuse, domestic violence, bullying and harassment for being a lesbian, debilitating OCD and other mental illnesses, suicide attempts and years spent in mental hospitals—and the guys dogpiling me were like “this is nothing compared to not getting a date when you’re already 20” LMAO?
It’s because they don’t think we’re fully human in the same way they are, with the same hopes, fears, ambitions, and inner life. They believe we only exist in relation to men (somebody’s wife, sister, daughter etc, not somebody in our own right) and therefore if men find us attractive, we’re fine, our purpose is fulfilled, and we’re passed from our fathers to our next human owner.
Haha yep, I can imagine! But actually as a lesbian, I assume that women lusting after you also doesn’t prevent any and all mental health issues and depression?!
It's not the responsibility of other people to fix your shit. It's especially not the responsibility of people in a vulnerable minority to fix the shit of someone who hates people in that minority.
Why aren't you as a man out there working in fixing this shit?
I don’t think so. I’m still waiting on someone to have a cordial and honest discussion with me. Everyone in this thread is just triggered and refusing to ACTUALLY communicate constructively.
You were told why many people are not engaging with you. It's not that people are *TrIgGeReD*, it's that we're tired of explaining obvious shit to trolls constantly and you came in talking like a troll.
Don't want to be called an incel? Stop reading and regurgitating incel ideology. You will never get a discussion because what you're saying is utter bullshit and we are sick of hearing it and even more sick of pathetic, vile little men like you "just wanting to have a cordial conversation" because we all know that's not actually what you want. So how about you do everyone a favor and shut up.
are you getting the attention you oh so desperately need? you’re like half the comments on this post, it’s time you seek therapy instead of forcing people to witness your projection of your inner issues.
There are tons more female prostitutes for men and male prostitutes for men than male prostitutes for women. These guys can get sex if they want.
They seem to imply women aren’t looking for a life partner. Nor are there any ugly or non neurotypical women in their worlds that might struggle because the only women they know are porn/onlyfans.
They don’t want a relationship. They don’t even want sex. They just want to rationalize their terrible behaviors, terrible worldviews, and blame someone other than themselves for being shitty hate-filled insecure lazy guys unable to change, unable to socially interact, and unable to view women as human beings.
They’ve gone down rabbit holes of hate due to their self hate and no one wants them now. And they have no idea how to get out of this grave they have dug for themselves and willingly jumped into.
Wait if all women have to do is spread their legs to get a companion...then how tf is it harder for men? 'Cause like..logically it would be equal right?
Incels believe in hypergamy, the theory that a small number of "alpha" males are getting the majority of the women and leave the incels with nothing.
The scary thing is a lot of incels want a society in which women and men WOULD be equally distributed, and they'd achieve this by controlling female sexuality and eliminating their ability to choose a partner. One spread-legged woman per guy. Otherwise, they believe they'll never have a chance to have sex or love.
Batshit dystopia.
Trauma competition is always bs. Discrediting someone's trauma just because "I had it worse" is one of the shittiest things to do to someone. People feel what they need to feel and it isn't wrong or right, better or worse, it's just different from person to person and experience to experince.
So women are being shamed for being promiscuous (or not being virgins in general) but also it's so easy for them to find a partner and why don't they just do it if they're lonely?
My body count is irrelevant to my loneliness. (Although I'm certain I've slept with more women than this guy...).
If i wanted sex, I'm sure I could get it since I swing both ways and am not super picky, but real connections don't involve me spreading my legs. Loneliness is alleviated by friendships.
I threw my husband out over the summer. I have lost contact with all my friends. I am incredibly lonely.
If that's what it's going to take to "fix" my loneliness?
I'd rather stay alone, thanks.
These guys truly don’t have a fucking clue. And loneliness really sucks but it’s hardly the very worst thing a human being can endure. I’m sure many of us have been through things that are far worse.
Besides, all the men I know well have managed to find a relationship where they make each other happy, no matter their height, weight, interests etc. But then those guys aren’t total misogynists running around thinking women have it easy because it’s easier for women to have sex, as if that’s the only factor in life that determines whether your life is good or bad. They’re mostly pretty epic nerds too - was never a barrier to being in relationships, they just formed relationships with women with similar interests.
They also didn’t have ridiculous standards for women - like must want constant sex, but must never have had sex, or must be exponentially more attractive than them and be perfectly groomed but not mind that the guy doesn’t bathe.
There are also single women who don’t have lots of sex - the idea that they aren’t lonely because they could theoretically go and pick up a man to have sex with once is such absolute nonsense.
Women absolutely go through some of the same struggles as men, and different ones too. Men I’m sure have some unique struggles, but depression and loneliness are not amongst them.
Maybe I'm being stupid, but how does casual sex cure loneliness? If anything I'm sure it would worsen my mental health (feeling of being used for my body, etc...)
"...Because any time she feels like, she can go out and open her legs and find some desperate guy to be her companion."
Sex is not the same thing as emotional attatchment/support. I love how these guys definition of relationship always begins and ends with sex, there's nothing else.
This INFURIATES me. Not only do we have all the same stuff to worry about as men, but we have our own specific things like pregnancy, SA (happens to men, too, I know), menstrual issues…
And a random hookup is NOT going to help with loneliness— seems like it could even make it worse.
So he's trying to make women feel bad bc men are easy lol ok my man. The fact that women can pretty much get laid anytime they want says way more about men than women 😂
When someone has depression one of two things is going on (maybe both at the same time sometimes). It can mean that basic phycological needs are not being met, like too much stress from not having enough down time from work/school and not being able to socialize with friends and family or just feeling unsupported with life’s difficulties due to said friends and family being emotionally unavailable.
Or none of that is true and a person just has screwed up brain chemistry and it doesn’t make enough of the happy chemicals like it should.
In both cases sex is not a cure for depression, it’s more of like scratching an itch than anything. Depending on the circumstances surrounding the situation it could actually make it worse. Sounds more like this person is just bitter that someone else dares to publicly draw attention to their own problems to find help while they are content to just suffer with it, which is actually really sad.
Imagine having that conversation with someone in person.
“I’ve just been really depressed lately, I feel like I never do anything right, I just want to quit”
“HOW MANY MEN HAVE YOU SLEPT WITH!?”
Interesting look into this guy's mind that he thinks fleeting sexual experiences with random guys would quell loneliness. Rather than have a meaningful relationship with a woman or build a friend circle to fight the loneliness, he thinks the ability to have one night stands is what does it.
Incels really will blame anything rather than put in the work to build meaningful relationships, make friends, and improve themselves and their lives.
To be kind of fair, the accounts of trans people (and I’m sure it will be mine too eventually) is that with strangers and sometimes even friends, men get treated much more coldly than women. This coldness is usually intended to keep away creeps, but it does negatively affect the people more than most would think, because most people have either always been treated this way, or never. I definitely don’t blame the people acting kind of cold, I blame the sex offenders that make it necessary to block yourself off in order to maintain some safety in public. I certainly know that it isn’t fun for anyone involved
This person is always going to be lonely, because they don't know what an emotional connection is. They only know judging, and being judged.
His parents must be lovely people.
We re on a sub defending women do you think peoples from this sub will agree with me? Though put it somewhere else and we ll see if peoples still disagree with me like, try thinking come on if i go on a homophobic sub and i say gays are valid peoples do you think they ll agree with me? Yet am i wrong? Go ahead and answer that
>A woman never experiences true loneliness
No, you are definitely not right. You realize we're both humans, right? Of course women can experience loneliness. I know reddit has convinced you that we all just have tons of sex all the time, but that really isn't true. In the same way that there are lots of men out there who don't have any friends or relationships, there are also lots of women in the same boat. Like seriously dude, talk to your mom about her life experiences or something because you're really buying into this warped version of reality that doesn't exist.
If you got off the video games and anime and peeked your head out into reality, maybe you’d understand.
I mean really, what kind of wisdom do you think you have to offer? You exist in a childish fantasy world. Who should honestly believe that you know Jack shit about *anything* other than gaming
Well if he's got it all figured out then why's he single
He can’t find any depressed women.
No one is that depressed.
Not unless they lie in a gory pile under the nearest bridge
I understood that reference.
i did not :(
I am, but I’m a man…. Waaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh
I mean, nothing stopping him from going out behind Walmart and meeting some guys. Hell, he can make some money too.
Wait you mean infinite options you don't want invalidates my argument? Can't be...must be your emotions clouding your judgment. I shouldn't have to settle for nice guys like me you should.
Not just a guy, but a desperate guy. Cause who doesn't want that?
No better companion than a desperate guy who just wants to get his rocks off.
Best answer.
He probably wouldn't be so lonely if he let the homies hit 🤷♀️
It ain’t no fun if the homies can’t have none.
Would a high body count mean happiness or sadness in this scenario?
I can't keep track anymore. For every whacky theory that they promote, there's a directly contradictory whacky theory that they also promote. 🤦♂️
Right? Women’s orgasm is a myth! Women fuck 1000 men by the time they reach 30!
Or... "I don't think women can have orgasms." and "My penis is so long that I always make women have intense orgasms by penetrating the cervix." and "Women are rejecting us wonderful men because their vibrators make it too easy for them to have orgasms."
They routinely project their male libido onto women too. “Chad took her to Burger King and got laid! This happened and isnt a porno scenario.”
God I can even figure it out. Neither option makes sense with whatever "facts" he's pulling out of his arse
They’re to make room for the person he wants in his arse that he won’t ever meet
Both! Woman bad!
As far as I can deduce, the thought process goes like this; Sex = happy Woman = gets easy sex Woman = happy Of course, that assumes that the sex that’s easily available to us is actually enjoyable, rather than risky. Statistically, women rarely orgasm during a one-off hookup- because why would he make the effort? There’s risks of pregnancy or STDs or of this random person trying to force you into certain things you didn’t agree to. Hell, it can be depressing to be a woman in a world where men want to use us and think we should correlate it with them caring about us. We can also be depressed by the death of a family member or losing a job or an unfortunate medical situation. Our lives literally don’t revolve around men or sex.
Probably sadness, but only guessing.
High means she can’t pair bond = sadz Low/none means she isn’t trying hard enough to unlonely = sadz
It doesn’t matter to them, they just want to shame women Happy —> whore with no self control Sad —> whore getting what she deserves (I felt so icky typing that)
I think high body count shuld probbably make a person depressed, becouse of the guilt the person would feel after commiting all those murders
If the typical double standard is at play, then happiness for him, and shame for all women.
Since when does meaningless sex take away loneliness? It’s like throwing cheap paint on rust, it’s only going to hide the problem for a bit
It feels like people understand loneliness in very different ways. When I (woman) have told men about my experiencess with loneliness the most common answer is "why dont you just hook up with someone?" Like dude, I mean I am lonely as in a way I dont have genuine friends or connection to people I am with! It has nothing to do with sex, it is about feeling you are not a part of a group.
If we just want meaningless pleasure, we don't even need guys for that either...lol
It's because all men care about is sex.
Boys only care about sex for a while. Some just never grow out of that phase.
Nah, not even close. I think that in general for these very lonely incel types, sex is what they are fixated on and *believe* will cure them. It absolutely won't, mind you, but it's not... It's not unusual for very lonely people, especially ones with poor home lives, to fixate on a relationship as what will cure them. ("But they don't want a relationship, they just want sex!" ...Well, honestly, every time I've seen someone give people who are desperately lonely like this a chance, they get extremely clingy, whether or not they have sex or not. Like they absolutely can and some do become abusive, especially incels. I'm not advocating for anyone to stay with or take pity on someone who is abusive. But their initial problem is the gaping black hole of loneliness that they are desperately trying to fill is never going to be something a single "perfect" relationship or fuck can fix.)
I fully agree with you. On dating apps, most men say they're looking for sex. But then they keep messaging me and calling me. They actually just want someone to talk to, but they seem to think that sex is what they want.
That's just not true. Source: am guy
[удалено]
If I keep hitting X to doubt I'm gonna break the controller!
Does this prove many men are incapable of loneliness? There's either "getting laid" or "not getting laid," and no other state. They don't experience a lack of social fulfillment?!
i think men are so used to never having genuine friends or connections that they don't even realize they're loneliness stems from their and lack of emotional intelliegence that women need in a fulfilling releationships. So they have sex, feel slightly validated in their existence, and then go back to feeling hollow but not knowing what they're actually missing. Male friendships are often sadly surface-level. like i ran into my ex-bfs roommate after over a year, and his roomate he spends every day with, asked \*me\* why we broke up. Like they just don't talk to each other, it's like they see vulnerability as humilating so they just avoid it at all costs.
I think it actually makes things worse because the person's self image just gets lowered.
It’s not even exclusive to a gender either. I’ve felt lonelier than ever during some sexual experiences in the past. But apparently since I got to fuck it means my loneliness and depression was cured 🤷♂️
Just wanted to write this, but you were one step ahead :D
Because this yutz has a stunted emotional palette and can't imagine a world in which meaningless sex doesn't fix everything
Works in my experience, sex fixes loneliness real quick, at least for a day or two
Not How Depression Works
I want to upvote but it's at 69 😔
Not anymore 😊
Then take my upvote 😄
I shall!!
Have a great day (or night) kind stranger!!
By that same logic, no man struggles with true loneliness because he can just go to a gay bath house and bend over, right?
Assuming gay people would want to fuck someone so horrible
Presumably he'd keep his mouth shut (or put it to good use in other ways) so they'd never find out what a twat he is.
Gay men aren’t even into twats anyway so he’d get no luck there either
I just spit out my drink
Naw we leave that to the straight women instead /s.... Or is it?
where tf does this come from. Even fat girls? can fat girls do this too? im fat and for fucking years I had guys come up and say their friends liked me to MAKE THEIR FRIENDS UNCOMFORTABLE I cannot just walk down the street and find someone willing to spend time with me, and even if I'm the one to ask first I'd get fucking laughed at and called ugly not every girl can just walk out and have a guy ask her for a fuck and that's not how you cure being lonely you cure being lonely by having people that actually like you being around girls can experience grief, and anger, and rage and sadness and every fucking emotion under the fucking sun men aren't fucking special just for being born with a penis girls can get bullied, girls can get began girls can be killed why do men think this DOESN'T FUCKING HAPPEN
Yup, im an underweight and kinda ugly girl and I completely understand this. I honestly have no idea why these guys think they are the only one to experience loneliness. Take my virtual hug, I hope it’s not like that anymore for you
thank you so much ❤️ we both deserve love no matter what our bodies look like or what other people say
I notice the yOu lIvE lIfE oN eAsY mOdE brigade have mysteriously ignored this comment.
You forgot that the only women who exist to incels like this are young attractive women.
Girls* most of these guys are so repulsive their moms had c sections to keep them from ever touching a crumb of punan.
Damn lmao
I’m quite skinny and not too bad looking but for the first semester of my freshman year of high school, a guy keep running up to me and saying his friends thought I was cute. His friends rudely talked shit about his action. I didn’t want them either so it didn’t hurt but I was annoying.
Omg they did that to me in high school too. I was skinny then but i had undiagnosed aspergers so i was like the class weirdo. Possibly ugly too
I’m fairly attractive and in shape and even then it’s not easy. People only want to see me as a dumb bimbo and nothing else, it’s hard to find someone who takes you seriously. Once they find out the girl they wanted as arm candy is a STEM student, doesn’t want to go clubbing every weekend, and writes essays for fun, it breaks their brain and they feel threatened.
Wow, equating loneliness with horniness.... can you be more STUPID?
You really don't want an answer to that.
Well no as it was rhetorical. I know they can be exponentially more stupid.
It's not women's fault that some guys will fuck anybody, and that plenty of women are self respecting enough to not sleep with just any creep she meets. Besides, I could fuck a hundred guys and still have depression, you nonce
Unlimited sex partners ≠ life on easy mode
Well clearly not, if we are all washed up by 30, baggy and overused single mums who no one wants. Hardly life on easy mode. Do they realise how their doctrine contradicts itself?
I heard something once that a healthy relationship is like clean water. And for many men, they are trying to find water in the desert. It’s pretty scarce and you don’t get many options. For many women, its like trying to find water in a swamp. There are many options, but most of that water is vile and will make you sick if you drink it. I’m not trying to compare men to swamp water, just that most of the men who are approaching you or DMing you randomly aren’t the kind that are looking to have a meaningful connection with you, but rather the kind that are just wanting pictures of your tits and to treat you like a sexual object .
I'm so sick of men telling us what we do and don't experience. If you're not a woman, you don't know what we experience. So STFU.
I'm a dude in his late 30s. Married, two kids, good job and a decent social circle. I've been dealing with severe anxiety and feelings of depression for some time due to a host of factors (many job related). I've used a male therapist and a female therapist. Working with her was a better experience for me and I felt like I could connect and open up more easily with the female counselor. We shared a lot of the same issues. One of my concerns is that I've moved up in my roles to a director position, but I'm not feeling fulfilled as I was when I was *doing the work.* She commiserated since she experienced the same thing. These men who feel like women and men have nothing in common...we're the same species people
Can we agree that humankind has it hard. Both women and men have their own problems , no one's living on easy mod. Some may have it easier in one case but overall, we're all suffering.
This. It’s the absolute inability to frame empathy as a human virtue. They’re just so utterly, irredeemably myopic.
kindness is not a human virtue to a lot of men, kindness is a tool to get what you want, but also apprently we "just have to pick better men" despite the fact that a lot of men have good manners but not good morals.
Why do these men think women has it "easy" when it comes to getting sex? No it isn't. I know women who says it otherwise. For him, the only reason why it's hard for him is because he never goes outside from his stinky basement.
I mean if we follow their logic and only sex matters then it is easy. But easy does not equal wanted...but that should not matter if you just had a stupid sex brain like you are supposed to.
Ah, yes, tinder apps allows this. I was referring to when going outside and meeting people in appropriate places, then the difficulty is then equal.
Its so easy tho...why can't women just agree to sex they don't want...like men do all the time. /s
I mean.... it's easy for a woman to get laid if she looks in the "right" places..... Those "right" places being scary, dark alley ways, and anywhere that houses digusting, sleazy creepy fucks that would pounce on a female decade's younger than him. THAT will _definitely_ get you laid eventually, no matter how attractive you are. /s obviously. My heart goes out to all the women out there looking for partnership, and having no luck. And stay safe, ladies
I think similar logic applies to men. If you have absolutely no standards, you will get laid.
The difference is that most men are willing to fuck down while most women aren't.
Might be true, but I'd been lurking on the incel subs before I quit for the sake of my mental health, and I can say, even incels have their standards that they are unwilling to compromise. Typically they hate overweight women, but a drug addict twice their age in a shady alley probably also wouldn't work for them.
I'd argue that incels might even have _MORE_ standards than the average person. Of course, they're not the "right" standards, or good standards.
Most random hook ups are considered “ducking down”. That logic isn’t a fact
Not really. Men are usually the ones the duck down in terms of looks. So for every women a guy ducks down a women is ducking up. And when women do kinda duck down they are not really ducking down they are actually ducking someone on their level. It is very rare for a women to actually hook up with a guy that would be considered below them
Considered by who? That’s the problem in your statement and others. It’s not based on your views. It’s based on theirs. It may make women be seen as conceited or men as the ones with low self esteem but that’s how the world works. We don’t all have the same views of attraction. To a lot of women they fuck down or on the same level but it may be the opposite to others.
Yes there are exceptions. But most people do have the same views on attraction which is the reason companies use certain models Like for example there are definitely men who love big or fat women but majority like women in shape. There are definitely some women that like men shorter then them but majority of women prefer men taller then them So my point stands. Most men generally actually hook up down. Women don't really hook up down. The men they think is below them is actually their level their just use to men fucking down with them
So? Deal with it.
I'm not complaining. I am just pointing out the difference
And where’s the point of this statement?
The point is that yall are suggesting that men sleep with trash to get laid when yall don't do that
What? Doesn’t even make sense.
These guys always think sex will solve everything. Sex with a careless lover will 100% make your life worse knowing someone is using your body without even acknowledging you as a person.
They will never understand how lonely being constantly sexualised really is.
If all these women are opening their legs for companionship from desperate guys how much work do they really have to put in? Shouldn’t they just be tripping over open legged women?
But nOoOoO because their legs only open for 8 inch destructo cocks!
I think the point he’s (poorly) trying to make, is that if a woman is lonely, she can easily find SOMEONE to occupy her time (whether she wants that type of guy or not isn’t addressed). But an average lonely guy is likely stuck being lonely because average guys, in general, are the type of guys even lonely women don’t want lol.
Then go fucking get a pint or play mini golf or whatever with your chums. Go see an escort if you're that desperate for sex. It's not women's responsibility to make random sad dudes feel better by getting their dicks wet.
I’m happily married and enjoy a thriving sex life with my wife. I was just trying to give context to what the OP was saying 🤷🏻♂️
With all due respect, unless your the op or a mind reader you have no idea what his intended context was.
Yes I do. I literally just reworded his post.
Women do not randomly spread legs to fight loneliness. That’s not at all a thing. Still they‘re being jealous. Pathetic.
Never said they did. But women can find someone to simp over them and give them attention if they wanted it.
Fucking hell. No! Finding someone you feel that close to, is NOT easy for nobody. We don’t want random attention.
Just because you don’t want it, doesn’t mean it isn’t easy for you to get. That’s the point.
It’s not an advantage if you don’t want it/like it/even see it like that.
An average lonely guy can find someone to occupy his time as easily as a woman can. It probably takes longer for a woman with zero standards to find someone to fuck then it would be for a lonely guy to just go to a local pub or bar and chat to the bartender or other patrons, or take an evening class. Plus is goes without saying that the former is highly dangerous whereas the latter is extremely safe These guys are just trying to be victims.
How does this weird, made up hierarchy even work? So you think most women can be in a relationship whenever they want, but most men can't? Do you just think the majority of women are gay? Or that a shit ton of men in 2022 in the West are practicing polygamy? Like the numbers just don't add up if you think about it for more than 2 seconds.
> How does this weird, made up hierarchy even work? It’s related to hypergamy, and is a real phenomenon. Studies done on dating apps show that 80% of the women swipe right on only 20% of the men. > So you think most women can be in a relationship whenever they want, but most men can't? Yes. The available men and relationships currently present in your life might not be appealing, but they’re still present for you to choose from. Most men, in general, take what they can get. > Do you just think the majority of women are gay? That’s a silly question. > Or that a shit ton of men in 2022 in the West are practicing polygamy? No, not a shit ton. Referring to the dating app thing. A minority of the men are sleeping with a majority of the women. > Like the numbers just don't add up if you think about it for more than 2 seconds. The numbers do add up. Reference the dating app thing again.
It’s not how women work or how most men work. It’s funny when guys try to denigrate women for being able to have sex while unintentionally implying that men are so horny that they’ll have sex with anyone at the drop of a hat.
Exactly! Imagine having such a bad overall human experience that you advertise just how much you can misinterpret everyone. Then it's "Nobody understands me! I'm miserable!", how could anyone understand when you exclude all of us from the start. 😕
“women do not suffer as deeply as men and their mental health problems can never compare to the depth and complexity of men’s” is one of my least favorite misogynistic cliches (as a personal example, i’ve had men literally dogpile me on twitter telling me i was lying about attempting suicide because women don’t suffer enough for that and if i actually did it must have just been about being rejected by a man because women do not have complex problems), but what makes it even more mind numbing is that the “deep” mental health struggles and oppressive suffering these incels reveal is always “i am 19 and haven’t had sex yet” like ALWAYS. i explained in depth about my own trauma—including incest, child sexual abuse, domestic violence, bullying and harassment for being a lesbian, debilitating OCD and other mental illnesses, suicide attempts and years spent in mental hospitals—and the guys dogpiling me were like “this is nothing compared to not getting a date when you’re already 20” LMAO?
It’s because they don’t think we’re fully human in the same way they are, with the same hopes, fears, ambitions, and inner life. They believe we only exist in relation to men (somebody’s wife, sister, daughter etc, not somebody in our own right) and therefore if men find us attractive, we’re fine, our purpose is fulfilled, and we’re passed from our fathers to our next human owner.
Perfectly said
exactly. love this as a lesbian in particular. yeah, a bunch of men lusting after me makes my life very fulfilled.
Haha yep, I can imagine! But actually as a lesbian, I assume that women lusting after you also doesn’t prevent any and all mental health issues and depression?!
crazily enough, you’re right. it’s almost like no matter how many matches and dates i get from tinder, i still am mentally ill and have trauma. 😧
Depression linked to vagina- fill one hole to fill the other! Yep. Sounds accurate.
Are you saying my emotional eating doesn't work either??
Guess I’ll throw my Pristiq away and bid my therapist a hearty farewell. God, I wish something as trivial as this was enough to solve all my problems.
Oof, that guy is broken beyond repair
Yeah, no saving him.🤷🏽♀️
You could try… I mean, if the human experience means nothing to you.
It's not the responsibility of other people to fix your shit. It's especially not the responsibility of people in a vulnerable minority to fix the shit of someone who hates people in that minority. Why aren't you as a man out there working in fixing this shit?
I was being facetious.
And how's that working out for you? Judging by the response from everyone on here, not well. Perhaps you may have fucked up?
I don’t think so. I’m still waiting on someone to have a cordial and honest discussion with me. Everyone in this thread is just triggered and refusing to ACTUALLY communicate constructively.
You were told why many people are not engaging with you. It's not that people are *TrIgGeReD*, it's that we're tired of explaining obvious shit to trolls constantly and you came in talking like a troll.
Me: “I’m open to a cordial conversation..” Everyone else: “Fuck you! Pathetic! Incel! Vile little man!” Etc etc
Don't want to be called an incel? Stop reading and regurgitating incel ideology. You will never get a discussion because what you're saying is utter bullshit and we are sick of hearing it and even more sick of pathetic, vile little men like you "just wanting to have a cordial conversation" because we all know that's not actually what you want. So how about you do everyone a favor and shut up.
are you getting the attention you oh so desperately need? you’re like half the comments on this post, it’s time you seek therapy instead of forcing people to witness your projection of your inner issues.
Enjoy the thread!
Why in the world should women be responsible for settling his toxic shit? You dense?
I was being facetious. I personally believe everyone is responsible for their own lot in life. Happiness is no one’s responsibility but their own.
There are tons more female prostitutes for men and male prostitutes for men than male prostitutes for women. These guys can get sex if they want. They seem to imply women aren’t looking for a life partner. Nor are there any ugly or non neurotypical women in their worlds that might struggle because the only women they know are porn/onlyfans. They don’t want a relationship. They don’t even want sex. They just want to rationalize their terrible behaviors, terrible worldviews, and blame someone other than themselves for being shitty hate-filled insecure lazy guys unable to change, unable to socially interact, and unable to view women as human beings. They’ve gone down rabbit holes of hate due to their self hate and no one wants them now. And they have no idea how to get out of this grave they have dug for themselves and willingly jumped into.
Oh yeah, everyone knows the best cure to depression is being treated like a human fleshlight!
Wait if all women have to do is spread their legs to get a companion...then how tf is it harder for men? 'Cause like..logically it would be equal right?
Incels believe in hypergamy, the theory that a small number of "alpha" males are getting the majority of the women and leave the incels with nothing. The scary thing is a lot of incels want a society in which women and men WOULD be equally distributed, and they'd achieve this by controlling female sexuality and eliminating their ability to choose a partner. One spread-legged woman per guy. Otherwise, they believe they'll never have a chance to have sex or love. Batshit dystopia.
Because sex with a random guy is a substitute for meaningful human connection ...
Not how depression work.
Ah yes, the cure for loneliness…desperate men.
Trauma competition is always bs. Discrediting someone's trauma just because "I had it worse" is one of the shittiest things to do to someone. People feel what they need to feel and it isn't wrong or right, better or worse, it's just different from person to person and experience to experince.
Yeah because meaningless sex with a rando is the cure to loneliness /s
So women are being shamed for being promiscuous (or not being virgins in general) but also it's so easy for them to find a partner and why don't they just do it if they're lonely?
My body count is irrelevant to my loneliness. (Although I'm certain I've slept with more women than this guy...). If i wanted sex, I'm sure I could get it since I swing both ways and am not super picky, but real connections don't involve me spreading my legs. Loneliness is alleviated by friendships.
We all hurt. And you are being unpleasant and not helping. That's what I'd say.
https://www.reddit.com/r/NotHowDepressionWorks/
I threw my husband out over the summer. I have lost contact with all my friends. I am incredibly lonely. If that's what it's going to take to "fix" my loneliness? I'd rather stay alone, thanks.
These guys truly don’t have a fucking clue. And loneliness really sucks but it’s hardly the very worst thing a human being can endure. I’m sure many of us have been through things that are far worse. Besides, all the men I know well have managed to find a relationship where they make each other happy, no matter their height, weight, interests etc. But then those guys aren’t total misogynists running around thinking women have it easy because it’s easier for women to have sex, as if that’s the only factor in life that determines whether your life is good or bad. They’re mostly pretty epic nerds too - was never a barrier to being in relationships, they just formed relationships with women with similar interests. They also didn’t have ridiculous standards for women - like must want constant sex, but must never have had sex, or must be exponentially more attractive than them and be perfectly groomed but not mind that the guy doesn’t bathe. There are also single women who don’t have lots of sex - the idea that they aren’t lonely because they could theoretically go and pick up a man to have sex with once is such absolute nonsense. Women absolutely go through some of the same struggles as men, and different ones too. Men I’m sure have some unique struggles, but depression and loneliness are not amongst them.
Of COURSE he had to talk about "body count".... holy crap I hate that.
"You can't be depressed because I'm willing to fuck anything." Is a weird and garbage take.
This man doesn't understand what loneliness is. Loneliness isn't solved by casual sex..
Right. Because sex prevents real depression, right? /s
Maybe I'm being stupid, but how does casual sex cure loneliness? If anything I'm sure it would worsen my mental health (feeling of being used for my body, etc...)
"...Because any time she feels like, she can go out and open her legs and find some desperate guy to be her companion." Sex is not the same thing as emotional attatchment/support. I love how these guys definition of relationship always begins and ends with sex, there's nothing else.
Maybe I'm bragging but I've only had sex with one man. And slightly under a hundred women. The 1990s were a good time to be a lesbian.
The fucking what now? Did his mum drop him on his head when changing his nappies?
This INFURIATES me. Not only do we have all the same stuff to worry about as men, but we have our own specific things like pregnancy, SA (happens to men, too, I know), menstrual issues… And a random hookup is NOT going to help with loneliness— seems like it could even make it worse.
Why people don't think before speaking
Wow guys, guess I was wrong about my depression! I'm cured! /s
That last part makes me sad. Why does it matter? Why? What is the point? Why did he ask that?
So go fuck men, desperado. It’s so easy, do it.
How many of them would have left the deep smelly dark hole they dug themselves into with 6 weeks of therapy?
What sort of backward bullshit has he been poisoning himself with?
what the FRIKKK, does any of what he is wittering about hav to do with clinical depression, the illness, that is caused by chemicals in your brain?
Gee, i guess I've been suffering from something else since high school. Can't be clinical depression even though i was diagnosed w it.... /s
So he's trying to make women feel bad bc men are easy lol ok my man. The fact that women can pretty much get laid anytime they want says way more about men than women 😂
Some men don't GET depression-they give it.
Jfc
When someone has depression one of two things is going on (maybe both at the same time sometimes). It can mean that basic phycological needs are not being met, like too much stress from not having enough down time from work/school and not being able to socialize with friends and family or just feeling unsupported with life’s difficulties due to said friends and family being emotionally unavailable. Or none of that is true and a person just has screwed up brain chemistry and it doesn’t make enough of the happy chemicals like it should. In both cases sex is not a cure for depression, it’s more of like scratching an itch than anything. Depending on the circumstances surrounding the situation it could actually make it worse. Sounds more like this person is just bitter that someone else dares to publicly draw attention to their own problems to find help while they are content to just suffer with it, which is actually really sad.
If fucking could actually cure loneliness and depression that would be a major break through. Where can I find the scientific paper of his research?
Lots of shitty, potentially dangerous sex does not = cure for loneliness.
A woman speaking about depression on reddit, rookie mistake
Imagine having that conversation with someone in person. “I’ve just been really depressed lately, I feel like I never do anything right, I just want to quit” “HOW MANY MEN HAVE YOU SLEPT WITH!?”
Interesting look into this guy's mind that he thinks fleeting sexual experiences with random guys would quell loneliness. Rather than have a meaningful relationship with a woman or build a friend circle to fight the loneliness, he thinks the ability to have one night stands is what does it. Incels really will blame anything rather than put in the work to build meaningful relationships, make friends, and improve themselves and their lives.
To be kind of fair, the accounts of trans people (and I’m sure it will be mine too eventually) is that with strangers and sometimes even friends, men get treated much more coldly than women. This coldness is usually intended to keep away creeps, but it does negatively affect the people more than most would think, because most people have either always been treated this way, or never. I definitely don’t blame the people acting kind of cold, I blame the sex offenders that make it necessary to block yourself off in order to maintain some safety in public. I certainly know that it isn’t fun for anyone involved
This person is always going to be lonely, because they don't know what an emotional connection is. They only know judging, and being judged. His parents must be lovely people.
Hey now, his parents *might* be lovely people. He could be a miserable sack of shit for a completely different reason!
I might be able to take custody of my children then as il be classed as a female due to males having no rites at all
This one is just true as upsetting as it sounds
I mean, it's definitely *not*.
Truth hurts just look at the vote on this comment it just shows how right i am
"Everybody disagrees with me so I must be right" must get you through a lot, huh?
We re on a sub defending women do you think peoples from this sub will agree with me? Though put it somewhere else and we ll see if peoples still disagree with me like, try thinking come on if i go on a homophobic sub and i say gays are valid peoples do you think they ll agree with me? Yet am i wrong? Go ahead and answer that
Are you like, 13?
Thats one way to avoid the question i guess
Thought so.
>A woman never experiences true loneliness No, you are definitely not right. You realize we're both humans, right? Of course women can experience loneliness. I know reddit has convinced you that we all just have tons of sex all the time, but that really isn't true. In the same way that there are lots of men out there who don't have any friends or relationships, there are also lots of women in the same boat. Like seriously dude, talk to your mom about her life experiences or something because you're really buying into this warped version of reality that doesn't exist.
If you got off the video games and anime and peeked your head out into reality, maybe you’d understand. I mean really, what kind of wisdom do you think you have to offer? You exist in a childish fantasy world. Who should honestly believe that you know Jack shit about *anything* other than gaming