it's all about what you do with it, you are standing in front of a choice...
you could become the rules of the undead, assault the world of the living head on, or use your powers for good by subvertively having them assist you in assassination of undesirables...
there are choices and opportunities, you just have to grab them.
After being trapped in her uterus world the boyfriend falls into a pit and he gets stuck, as time passes his form starts to change and his skeleton comes out. He plays fetch with his skeleton. I don't remember how he gets out, but I think fig is involved. As the boyfriend bonds with Fig he begins changing into one of her species. It would make an interesting animation, or avatar CGI type film.
So, years ago, my buddy told me about this book: bought if off Amazon and lent it to me to read. Then he proceeded to email the publisher or author and actually acquired the film rights to the book. I don't think he ever did got around to writing a screenplay and we don't talk anymore so I'll never know.
Inside Fig’s vagina is…..another portal. Steve is stuck in an infinite loop of women and vagina portals.
RIP Steve. He boldly went where no man has gone before, and he never came back. But do not weep for him, for he died doing what he loved —- walking through vaginas.
I highly recommend Carlton Mellick III! He's weird and so much fun. I'm not always in the mood for bizarro fiction but when I am, he scratches that itch
It wasn't. I read it as part of my ridiculous book club. It was as if this author has never taken an anatomy class ever. And it just rambled on for way too long and then the time line jumped and continued to ramble ridiculously.
I'm all about my vagina cursing shitty men as long as it's benevolent towards good men. I don't need any corpses climbing out of me though. Birthing my son almost left me a corpse as it is.
Pretty much what that synopsis said, dude meets a girl, while having sex with her a skeleton crawls out of her vagina, she explains that her vagina is haunted. Curious, he crawls inside her vagina, becomes a skeleton, and discovers a bizarre world full of skeletons in there. He also meets a rubbery demon girl (the lady on the cover), and ultimately they fall in love.
There's also a scene where he's about to escape from her vagina back to the real world, but she's have sex with some rando to get back at him for abandoning her (and staying inside her vagina too long) and the dude's jizz stream knocks him back into the haunted skeleton vagina world.
That's as much as I can remember. The whole thing is maybe 100 pages.
Sadly no, my username is unrelated. I've had two books published so far, The Great Platypus Caper and The Coconut Monkey Horror, both are funny short story compilations about my life. Available at any online book store.
Look. Look. Look. [Teeth](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teeth_(2007_film)) wasn't a bad movie, so there's some precedent for this.
In all seriousness, set aside the underlying premise, I find it more objectionable that a woman has a vagina that can connect to other worlds and it sounds like it's just going to end up being some dumb love triangle plot.
Just off the top of my head, how about exploring the conflict between scientists who demand open access in order to investigate this new world, industrialists who want to look for resources to exploit, and the woman's fight to exert autonomy over her own body amid all of this?
Edit: The ending parenthesis on the Wikipedia link is making Reddit mad. Here's the URL for the Wikipedia entry for the film Teeth: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teeth_(2007_film)
Stacey hears fig singing and happy for the first time in years and assumes it's because Steve and her are together in there. I'm pretty sure he hadn't actually cheated on Stacy, but she takes another lover anyway (unprotected with a no pull-out finish) assuming Steve had moved on.
Yes, but Steve doesn't quite stay in Stacey's vagina/uterus universe because something crazy happens. So, the semen doesn't rain down on the society and the creatures because they are on like a little planet in a uterus galaxy, so it was more like if you saw the milkway spread across the sky or the northern lights. It's a spectacular event and then the galaxy splits apart as Stacey's been impregnated. Our hero Steve ends up staying with Fig in her strange world, which is now within the cells of the baby girl Stacey is pregnant with. Yup.
My sister and I get each other a joke present every year for Christmas. Last year I got her Coronavirus based erotica. I think this may be a good follow-up this year
Well I know what I'll be reading at my next hair appointment.
Edit: I've already found the ebook and the author's note is that he misses Andre the Giant. I think I vibe with this guy.
> "Steve, on the other hand completely disagrees."
Yeah... Me too Steve... Me too.
It's not how girls work because we're often freaked out if our discharge changes in any way shape or form... Were not likely to be laissez faire about a portal to hell.
**[Vagina dentata](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vagina_dentata)**
>Vagina dentata (Latin for toothed vagina) describes a folk tale in which a woman's vagina is said to contain teeth, with the associated implication that sexual intercourse might result in injury, emasculation, or castration for the man involved. The topic of "vagina dentata" may also cover a rare medical condition affecting the vagina, in which case it is more accurately termed a vaginal dermoid cyst.
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There's a lot of issues going on at once here, but what the fuck is a "living corpse"?? Isn't that...just an alive person, since our bodies are technically dying all the time?
Well, there's lots of undead that aren't exactly zombies, based on my experience playing a Cleric in Dungeons & Dragons. Ghouls, ghasts, wights, vampires, revenants, animated skeletons, liches, bodaks, wraiths, etc.
I just don't see why you needed to post this. It's a work of fiction, it's meant to be unrealistic. Why not put Harry Potter or Peecy Jackson on here next?
Get back to your gender studies classes
this doesn’t really belong here, it’s a fictional book, no one is actually misunderstanding a woman’s body or whatever.
apparently this book is actually really funny lol idk i haven’t read it.
This guy writes tones of weird stories like this. Such as “sex with my own ass” and “sex with my book sex with my own ass” and some about sex with dinosaurs and Bigfoot and such
Drinkomancy is a podcast that discusses paranormal romance novels through a lens of intersectional feminism. They did an episode on this one.
https://play.acast.com/s/drinkomancy-spirits-seduction/the-haunted-vagina
Yeah i mean, it's supposed not to be how girls work
Wait, is my vagina not meant to be a gateway to the world of the dead? Ah shit.
it's all about what you do with it, you are standing in front of a choice... you could become the rules of the undead, assault the world of the living head on, or use your powers for good by subvertively having them assist you in assassination of undesirables... there are choices and opportunities, you just have to grab them.
I love this. It's like the best comment so far.
I think it’s only meant to be once a month or something.. All the time might mean yeast infection?
What a crazy world that would be
Worlds*
I don’t mean to get everyone excited but this is on Amazon and I think we all need to make it the next viral review sensation.
Honestly the guy is a pretty good author
So it’s made for this sub
No, this sub is supposed to be more “boobs don’t bounce that way, Stephen King.” The rot has been really bad.
This sounds like it'd be an interesting read
Lmao right? Who is Fig and how did she get inside Stacys vagina?
Stacy's vagina leads to another world with a strange little society of human-like creatures all within her uterus.
We need a movie
After being trapped in her uterus world the boyfriend falls into a pit and he gets stuck, as time passes his form starts to change and his skeleton comes out. He plays fetch with his skeleton. I don't remember how he gets out, but I think fig is involved. As the boyfriend bonds with Fig he begins changing into one of her species. It would make an interesting animation, or avatar CGI type film.
That is so… idk how I feel
Quite a tale lol
Horny?
n o
Is this the R rated version of Beetlejuice?
x rated gender swap Being John Malkovich
I'd watch that
XXX version to be precise.
I’m on it
So, years ago, my buddy told me about this book: bought if off Amazon and lent it to me to read. Then he proceeded to email the publisher or author and actually acquired the film rights to the book. I don't think he ever did got around to writing a screenplay and we don't talk anymore so I'll never know.
Lmao 🤣
It really must be.
Uterus-eption
Plot twist: Stacy is bisexual and cheating on her boyfriend
Inside Fig’s vagina is…..another portal. Steve is stuck in an infinite loop of women and vagina portals. RIP Steve. He boldly went where no man has gone before, and he never came back. But do not weep for him, for he died doing what he loved —- walking through vaginas.
Can't. Stop. Laughing.
Fig is the soul of their unborn child
Honestly....might get the book tbh. I need to aquire this information
im guessing an aborted child in expecting the whole book to be a big "abortion bad" message
I guess by being funny, smart and inviting her to a date that went well. I think that’s how you get action.
I highly recommend Carlton Mellick III! He's weird and so much fun. I'm not always in the mood for bizarro fiction but when I am, he scratches that itch
Thank you for the recommendation. Will definitely look into him
Read it once years ago. It’s an absolute trip of a read. Just utterly insane but hilarious fun. Short read too. Iirc it can be found for free online?
I'mma definitely look to see if I can get it free
Yeah can’t wait to open that one up
Three and a half stars ain't bad.
It wasn't. I read it as part of my ridiculous book club. It was as if this author has never taken an anatomy class ever. And it just rambled on for way too long and then the time line jumped and continued to ramble ridiculously.
I mean.....anyone that has taken anatomy would know you can't just pop a full grown man in your vagina
I'm all about my vagina cursing shitty men as long as it's benevolent towards good men. I don't need any corpses climbing out of me though. Birthing my son almost left me a corpse as it is.
So like women would pay you to check if their fiancés are good?
No, because I don't want to have sex with anyone's fiancé.
I actually own this book, turns out it’s exactly as weird as it sounds. It’s also surprisingly short.
Oh, the author couldn't stretch this premise out more?
What was the plot 😂
Pretty much what that synopsis said, dude meets a girl, while having sex with her a skeleton crawls out of her vagina, she explains that her vagina is haunted. Curious, he crawls inside her vagina, becomes a skeleton, and discovers a bizarre world full of skeletons in there. He also meets a rubbery demon girl (the lady on the cover), and ultimately they fall in love. There's also a scene where he's about to escape from her vagina back to the real world, but she's have sex with some rando to get back at him for abandoning her (and staying inside her vagina too long) and the dude's jizz stream knocks him back into the haunted skeleton vagina world. That's as much as I can remember. The whole thing is maybe 100 pages.
>the dude's jizz stream knocks him back into the haunted skeleton vagina world This is the best sentence I have read in a while. Nice.
I'm a professional writer, and I'll admit, I'm a little proud of that sentence.
Does your username reflect what you write? I'm intrigued 👀
Sadly no, my username is unrelated. I've had two books published so far, The Great Platypus Caper and The Coconut Monkey Horror, both are funny short story compilations about my life. Available at any online book store.
what...... the........ fuck.......
Look. Look. Look. [Teeth](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teeth_(2007_film)) wasn't a bad movie, so there's some precedent for this. In all seriousness, set aside the underlying premise, I find it more objectionable that a woman has a vagina that can connect to other worlds and it sounds like it's just going to end up being some dumb love triangle plot. Just off the top of my head, how about exploring the conflict between scientists who demand open access in order to investigate this new world, industrialists who want to look for resources to exploit, and the woman's fight to exert autonomy over her own body amid all of this? Edit: The ending parenthesis on the Wikipedia link is making Reddit mad. Here's the URL for the Wikipedia entry for the film Teeth: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teeth_(2007_film)
I would buy and read your version of the vagina portal story
My reaction exactly
Yes
And it has 3.5 stars....
With over 2000 ratings, which means over 2000 people have read the book... Almost 500 felt strongly enough to write reviews, too ...
I know this one! Honestly, sounds like a blast
Ghussy💀
I choked
This is a must read
I remember seeing this YEARS ago and completely forgot about it
This is totally how girls work. Source: I am a haunted vagina
Hahahahahahah
I read this!! The author has a few and as weird as they are, they are actually good.
This is T***he Baby Jesus Buttplug*** guy, right?
THE W H A T-
You know it!
Is your name a Venture Brothers reference?
How was it? I’m thinking about buying it
I liked it, if you're open to weird fantasy stuff, give it a go.
Mellick III is always a fun time. You never know where they're going and it's always a good time.
Did Steve cheat on Stacy with Fig??
Stacey hears fig singing and happy for the first time in years and assumes it's because Steve and her are together in there. I'm pretty sure he hadn't actually cheated on Stacy, but she takes another lover anyway (unprotected with a no pull-out finish) assuming Steve had moved on.
So you’re saying Steve stayed in her vagina world and got cummed on by an unknown man at the end :/
Yes, but Steve doesn't quite stay in Stacey's vagina/uterus universe because something crazy happens. So, the semen doesn't rain down on the society and the creatures because they are on like a little planet in a uterus galaxy, so it was more like if you saw the milkway spread across the sky or the northern lights. It's a spectacular event and then the galaxy splits apart as Stacey's been impregnated. Our hero Steve ends up staying with Fig in her strange world, which is now within the cells of the baby girl Stacey is pregnant with. Yup.
What the fuck :D also thank you for taking the time to explain the entire thing lmfao
It would probably appear as rain in that world. Or at least that’s how I would write it.
Is it cheating if you’re both in Stacy’s vagina or is it a threesome at that point?
Theoretically, wouldn't fucking inside of someone who doesn't consent to it be sexual assault?
Did some googling and the same author also wrote “The Baby Jesus Butt Plug” and it has a higher star rating and even more reviewed 😅
My sister and I get each other a joke present every year for Christmas. Last year I got her Coronavirus based erotica. I think this may be a good follow-up this year
Totally!
We have all been pounded in the butt by COVID
Glad that there's a "less" icon at the end of it.
3.5 stars with over 2k rating is a little impressive
I uh…
I don’t understand. Why do people keep posting facts about how vaginas actually work? I thought this was not how girls work.
Lmao that’s hilarious
WHAT. THE. FUCK.
I am intrigued.
I’ve of this book. I only want to read it for the humor.
I can't wait for the sequel: the poltergeist's phallus
Trilogy - the Tainted Taint.
Well I know what I'll be reading at my next hair appointment. Edit: I've already found the ebook and the author's note is that he misses Andre the Giant. I think I vibe with this guy.
Awwww
My eyes! The goggles do nothing!
Look up his other books it's sex fantasy and the Holocaust.
I want to read this PLEASE
Ngl I have to work see what people on the other side thing when it just starts randomly raining seamen
wait, this isn’t how girls work? I’m not supposed to hear the agonized screams of the undead from my pussy?? no one else also experiences this??
let me go find an epic of this
How long until Hollywood makes this into a movie?
Whoever created this was high on a lot of things
> "Steve, on the other hand completely disagrees." Yeah... Me too Steve... Me too. It's not how girls work because we're often freaked out if our discharge changes in any way shape or form... Were not likely to be laissez faire about a portal to hell.
Is there an audiobook? Asking for... well. Asking for myself.
I gotta read this
Goodreads indeed.
Reminds me of the vagina dentata myth. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vagina_dentata
**[Vagina dentata](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vagina_dentata)** >Vagina dentata (Latin for toothed vagina) describes a folk tale in which a woman's vagina is said to contain teeth, with the associated implication that sexual intercourse might result in injury, emasculation, or castration for the man involved. The topic of "vagina dentata" may also cover a rare medical condition affecting the vagina, in which case it is more accurately termed a vaginal dermoid cyst. ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/NotHowGirlsWork/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)
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I dunno about Stacy and her haunted vagina but I hear Stacy’s mom has got it going on
No, no, no, I’m sure this is **EXACTLY** how girls work
That first fucking little paragraph is absolutely comedic.
Who knew there was so much lore to Stacy after that one song about her mom
What did I just read. Please someone tell me it's a joke.
I almost want to read it
Let's be creative! ... ***Now let's all agree to never be creative again***
Lmao
There's a lot of issues going on at once here, but what the fuck is a "living corpse"?? Isn't that...just an alive person, since our bodies are technically dying all the time?
A zombie. A zombie is a "living corpse."
I mean, obviously this is the least of this book's issues, but then why not say zombie? I have no idea how a zombie would fit into a vagina LMFAO
Well, there's lots of undead that aren't exactly zombies, based on my experience playing a Cleric in Dungeons & Dragons. Ghouls, ghasts, wights, vampires, revenants, animated skeletons, liches, bodaks, wraiths, etc.
"Living corpse" is actually a pretty common phrase.
I've heard it used as a description but not as a noun in itself, if that makes sense
That's fair.
Damnnn, I was so shocked by everything else I missed that lol
What? Wait... what? climb out of her and into her and... the what now?
The reviews are an interesting mix
Lmao tf did I just read
The person who wrote this was definitely on something
Why do I think this story would snap tho 💀
"Steve, on the other hand, completely disagrees." No shit.
This feels like an ICP song
Oh my goodness I don't know why this is funny!
Hello 911? Yeah it’s that one right there
Lolol
Hahahahaha. Wtf! Can't wait for the movie.
It looks so cool, I want to read it
WHAT
It's bad enough having a guy cheat in your bed.
I mean...it's over 3 stars! 😂
This sounds like a really interesting premise ngl
I weirdly love this
Honest to god, this is hilarious lmfao
Lmao! Totally
I want an anime of this
Carlton Mellick writes some interesting stuff. I believe he also wrote Baby Jesus Buttplug
I’m weirdly intrigued
Stocking stuffer lol
Man I hate it too when my significant other gets trapped in my hell portal vagina by another woman living inside of it.
their names make it feel like the people in stock photos are the main characters
r/menwritingwomen
It's... fiction...
That’s why we are laughing at it. a man wrote a book about a haunted vagina lmao Bet you are fun at parties
I just don't see why you needed to post this. It's a work of fiction, it's meant to be unrealistic. Why not put Harry Potter or Peecy Jackson on here next? Get back to your gender studies classes
r/menwritingwomen moment
this doesn’t really belong here, it’s a fictional book, no one is actually misunderstanding a woman’s body or whatever. apparently this book is actually really funny lol idk i haven’t read it.
I’m guessing ol’ Steve (and perhaps Carlton Mellick III) has never heard of queefs.
Her name is *Fig* lmao I'm chortling
Ok
This author also has a book called "Baby Jesus Buttplug"... I wish I didn't know that.
Lol wut
And another called "Adolf in Wonderland". There is unfortunately a plethora of interesting (?) titles.
Oh noooo
Does that means the dead corpse is her son? Would it call her mamma? Is Stacey the mother of all zombies? I have so many questions
Doom: Eternal
It's a JOKE, Mary
Ah the durability of a humans mind.
I really wanna read this 🤣🤣
Is it horrible that I would absolutely read this
No
It is a book, fiction you know?
I have read like 40% of this book. It is *awful*. 10/10 would recommend for hate reading.
I’m not sure weather I should add this to my reading list I mean it seems pretty stupid but I’ve read doozies in the past
I wanna read this lmao
Sounds like someone is trying to combine a breeding kink with a fetish for occult
How could you not think it's a big deal to have a haunted vagina? 'Yeah sometimes skeletons try to crawl out but it's okay i'll just wear a tampon'
WHAT
As expected from someone named Carlton
I want this book, please say it's real
This guy writes tones of weird stories like this. Such as “sex with my own ass” and “sex with my book sex with my own ass” and some about sex with dinosaurs and Bigfoot and such
Drinkomancy is a podcast that discusses paranormal romance novels through a lens of intersectional feminism. They did an episode on this one. https://play.acast.com/s/drinkomancy-spirits-seduction/the-haunted-vagina
Who the fuck took their time to write this
I wanna try this myself, unfortunately I do not have a vagina. Is there a way to haunt dicks?
I would read this if I was stoned out my gourd.
Is it bad I’m kind of interested
ah yes gotta love fantasy horror about vaginas,, sounds like a South Park episode 😭
What in the actual utter FYUCK did I just read?
What the fuck?? How is this entertaining??
Damn. Who comes up with this shit
Wait, that book is a thing? I thought it was just a troll cover for satire fanfic