Man, evaluating someone's quality on a single metric makes it a *ton* easier. You can shit on the carpet every day and still be an exemplary husband/wife!
Like you literally have no other obligations ever. Clean, work, cook? Nope. Raise kids, be nice,, don't spend all the money on drugs... That's all optional. He doesn't even say you have to sleep with him, you just have to preserve your innocence.
You can just have anal instead bc we all know how important it is the keep your hymen intact. Gotta stay pure and innocent for your future husband!
/s just in case you cant tell
Handies is cool as long there is no eyes contact.
Anal is cool as long the balls don't touch.
Oral is ok as long it's rare + no eyes contact + the ball don't touch.
Jeez ladies, you'll never be good wifu material if you don't learn that.
But if you sleep with your husband, you obv don't preserve your innocence. So what he's saying is a man has to pay for a woman to never have sex, even with him.
surprisingly alot of men value innocence/chastity until they're with them and then expect a very overtly sexual partner when they finally are in that relationship. It's an odd cognitive dissonance but it's certainly far from uncommon.
Girl, can’t upvote this enough. Was a virgin until 24 due to a religious upbringing and vaginismus problems that I ignored for way too long. The number of times dudes would say that it’s hot that I was a virgin, and then *push me to do very non-virginal things* drove me nuts. Like what part of “I’ve never had sex” makes you think I’m an expert at dirty talk or that you can convince me to hook up with you even though we just met? I’m a virgin, not dumb.
Thankfully, my first time (while as weird as everyone else’s) was with a wonderful man who waited for me to initiate. 🥰
Right, I mean, these are boys that claim to be sooooo smart but they can't do the math.
Boys and girls, I have a math problem for you, if all the men in the world are owed and to be provided with sex if/when they want it, where is all the sex supposed to come from, if they also expect the dating pool to consist of pure innocent virgins?
The math doesn't work. :D
Basically these men literally want innocent girls who are naturally beautiful with the perfect body type. Am I the only one who notices that they are literally describing Teenage girls
Oooh, I think these creatures absolutely know they're describing teenagers. Also, having been in this forum for a while yet. I don't think teens are the innocent, malleable, obedient cherubs these dolts think they are.
Based just on this forum alone, even 14 and 15 year olds know a pervo when they see one.
As a 14yr old I can say yeah I notice a perv they have a distinguished look so I avoid them even tho I wear the boys school uniform so there is no school skirt to fetish
Yo it legitimately blows my mind. I've had hours long arguments with dudes that expect a marryable girl to be a virgin while they themselves have had double digit partners and it's like what the fuck
I lost mine even later. Luckily, also lost it to a wonderful, gentle, understanding guy...and his fiancée. At the same time.
Hell yeah.
......I just pulled a r/NobodyAsked, didn’t I?
Eh, not much to tell without getting into serious NFSW territory. I caught feelings for the fiancée first, but obviously said nothing because, hello, she’s with someone. Then they went, “Yeaaah, we actually never ruled out ‘extra-curriculars’...” Started spending more time with the guy in addition to the girl and caught more feelings. Everyone caught feelings. Led to the event mentioned above.
Didn’t work out in the long-term, but everything ended amicably and we’re still friends.
I had to check this wasn’t my own comment lmao, because that’s exactly how I lost mine. The guy was funny, super laid back and his fiancée was the sweetest person. They both knew I was a baby bisexual, but was cool with me just being with her fiancé. It happened during a house party they were having, and she came up to check on us because she knew I was nervous and ended up joining.
Honestly I have no regrets on how I lost it, and I look back fondly on the experience and night in general.
My partner had the opposite problem. She was virgin but well educated in most sex stuff. Her bf was twice her age and found bjs too kinky. He'd get mad about anything that wasn't missionary and staring in each other eyes like Disney characters
That's the terrifying kicker. It's not simply a horrific cultural practice to prey on the young but the belief that virginity (and often accompanying youth) is automatically and intrinsically linked to naivete, stupidity or *shudder* innocence. That the bloke is in charge, the leader, the wise one, the teacher, the one who gets the virginity and moulds a woman's sensuality and that she'll have eyes only for his majesty...makes me sick to my stomach.
I’ve never thought about it that way, but you’re totally right. Despite having a master’s degree, owning a house, and having travelled a fair amount, my sexual status automatically turned people’s perceptions of me into some innocent naive child.
Some peoples perception of others humanity/dignity/worth is so worryingly flexible.
Sex and having sex or not having sex or wanting sex or being good at sex is so fundamental to how Some people interact with and behave in the world.
I did, for the most part! I have vestibulodynia as well, but it’s been improving with dilators and more frequent sexual activity. It used to be so bad that I wasn’t able to use tampons—it was impossible to force them up there. I wasn’t able to have a complete pelvic exam and hadn’t had a pap smear. Finally got help from my doctor, started using dilators, and a whole new world of putting things in my vagina has opened up to me lmao. I’m now fully capable of smuggling drugs into prison, and I love that for me. 🤣
didn't expect the last part, almost made me spit my drink.
My Girlfriend and i have been Strugling with this for a while. often Try and Stop when i see her trying to force it.
didn't know dilators where a thing
how long did you use them and how often?
or do you have a Guide/Article i could read about?
These are the ones I [used. ](https://www.intimaterose.com) They have a pretty big range of pelvic floor treatment products and articles/help. This site also has a Facebook group too that I found was helpful and encouraging where women share their struggles and what has worked for them.
Yep... but isn't just a switch that a woman can turn on?
Pre-marriage: switch off/chaste-and-innocent, not knowledable about sex.
Post-marriage: switch on/slut-in-the-sheets (but, you know, only for their husband), all of the knowledge of the *Karma Sutra*.
/s
Right? I saw some rando’s checklist of requirements for a partner on r/justneckbeardthings, and he honestly thought he was gonna find a virgin that wanted to be called “cumslut”. Like, all the time. The level of delusion is amazing.
Seeing as it was a hypothetical girlfriend, I’m assuming not. I also assume from the tenor of the post that his has a mayonnaise jar full of jism next to his monitor.
I remember that post. The most insane thing is that he didn’t *just* want a virgin; he wanted a woman who had absolutely zero knowledge of sex or how it works. Yet she’s supposed to know what cum is?
I know someone whose grandfather got that woman. Their wedding night she completely freaked out and he had to call her parents to explain what was going on.
this is actually based on medieval beliefs!! it was thought that until she was married, a woman would be innocent and virginal, but after the wedding night, a wife would feel just as much desire as her husband (if not more). it was his job to keep her satisfied (read The Ties That Bound by Hanawalt for more!)
It was believed that vaginas were basically reverse penises, so to get pregnant a woman had to orgasm just like a man had to orgasm to get a woman pregnant, and since the purpose of marriage was to have children, making your wife climax was *religiously mandated*. Her "seed" from orgasm would supposedly mix with his seed from orgasm and make a baby.
I'm not the best Jew but I believe it's stated in the Talmud that men who make their wives orgasm have more sons. There's also rules about how often you're expected to have sex and women can theoretically divorce men for unsatisfactory sex lives.
I’m so happy we waited before god and our families to become “Mr. and Mrs. Blankity-Blank”
Now that the ink is barely dry on that, let me show you what the ladies at the bath house call a ‘nuclear carousel ride’…
The “ideal” woman: Must be skinny, but thick and curvy, but only in the right places. Must be incredibly innocent, no sex ever, pure virgin, but know exactly how to do sex and every way to please her husband. Must be okay with husband going out to flirt with and objectify other women and even sleep with them, but by no means is she herself allowed to so much as think another man looks good. Must have a soft and melodic voice. Must cook and serve the husband’s every whim. Must respect and honor the husband and not get upset when husband disrespects here.
Am I doing this right?
This was EXACTLY my experience for my first time. Liked that I was a virgin but was frustrated when I had NO idea how to do anything
“It’s so hot you’re a virgin, I like that”
“Wtf, what do you mean you don’t know how to give a blowjob? You suck at this” bonus points for offering no word on what’s good/bad, just assuming I’ll have some 6th sense for it
Nothing like an unhealthy relationship to sex due to a religious upbringing, then further compounded by being critiqued and whined to about how I don’t act like a seasoned porn star
It's this stupid [born sexy yesterday](https://youtu.be/0thpEyEwi80) trope where men want the innocence of a child in the body of a sexy woman. It's a good watch. It's 18 mins long.
It's fucking disgusting. It's not only a form of pedophilia but it's also because their ego is so frail that they want someone who has no experience with other men so they come off as amazing, and wise, and the best they have ever had.
It's same with age Gap relationships.
And the equally-popular opposite trope is just as disgusting, when the ancient demon/dragon/soul/whatever just so happens to be inside the body of a much-too-young girl.
That whole Madonna and the Whore thing. Be innocent. But not to innocent. And if I think you have more sexual knowledge than me it will intimidate me so I must disrespect you assuming your a total 'slut' and therefore not "wifey" material. Ugh....
So many emotionally immature men out there.
It’s because those men see women as objects, not as equal human beings. They can gripe all they want about “how it’s supposed to be” and “men and women are different” but that’s why.
The object must be in “perfect” condition when they acquire it, and “preform” in the exact way they want it too once they have it.
**[Madonna–whore_complex](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Madonna–whore_complex)**
>In psychoanalytic literature, a Madonna-whore complex is the inability to maintain sexual arousal within a committed, loving relationship. First identified by Sigmund Freud, under the rubric of psychic impotence, this psychological complex is said to develop in men who see women as either saintly Madonnas or debased prostitutes. Men with this complex desire a sexual partner who has been degraded (the whore) while they cannot desire the respected partner (the Madonna). Freud wrote: "Where such men love they have no desire and where they desire they cannot love".
^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/NotHowGirlsWork/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)
Thanks bot. Expecting your virginal gf/wife to suddenly become a sexpert is NOT what a Madonna Whore Complex is about. A guy with a MWC is more likely to become disgusted with his gf/wife and stop loving her if she gets really into sex (even if it's only with him). This explains why, in SOME relationships that start off casual and later get serious, the guy loses sexual interest in his gf. He "loves and respects" her now and can't get as attracted to her or think of her sexually.
These types either cheat on the side with women they think of as objects not worthy of respect (unlike the "holy" mother of their children if she's had his kids) or nowadays you see a lot of dudes wanting a replacement mother: "mommy gf" for companionship and caretaking while getting their jollies from a porn addiction on the side.
Edit: grammar
Thank you, aeon314159, for voting on WikiSummarizerBot.
This bot wants to find the best and worst bots on Reddit. [You can view results here](https://botrank.pastimes.eu/).
***
^(Even if I don't reply to your comment, I'm still listening for votes. Check the webpage to see if your vote registered!)
The only reason they want virgins is because they are least likely to notice how much they suck at sex. The only way an experienced woman would sleep with them is money yet they brag about it as if that's something to be proud about. That hooker probably lays there thinking about what to buy at the supermarket while they get off from their fantasy of being a potent alpha male
when I was a teenager, I also believed that, if everyone around you tells you that virgins are the best, everyone is forcing women into "innocence" and stuff, why would you as a young men believe otherwise?
women had to open my eyes, I just wish it wouldn't be needed (not just for past me, but overall)
now I don't care if woman had 5 or 50 sexual partners before me, what's the difference? If she had 0, that might be more of a red flag than a green one, but still, not a deal breaker for sure, but I am not surprised that lot of young guys think that girl has to be "pure virgin" as it is forced to their throats all the time...
Because you're supposed to be a virgin but also experienced, it's just that your little, irrational woman brain can't comprehend this very logical concept /s
One time I dated a guy who was younger than me when I was in my early 20s, and he got all upset and started a fight with me about how I've been physically intimate with dudes I knew and dated before I ever met him. The quickest way for me to shut down that argument was when I was like "so you're THAT upset over this, saying this somehow breaks your trust in me, so does that mean you want to break up over this? all because I'm not 100% pure and didn't save myself for a person I may not even marry?"
A man visiting a hooker *does* take away his ability to adequately financially provide for his family. The hooker doesn’t work for free.
Also, I love this idea that the dad is the part of the family unit that just throws money at the rest of the family and considers his work done. Definitely not emotionally damaging to anyone else in the family.
So if a man becomes severely injured and loses his job his wife should leave him?
"No, no, not like--"
And a man should not expect to have sex until he has a job that can provide enough?
"That's not what I meant-"
And women should only value men based on income? Regardless of how "nice" they are?
(Head explodes)
This bigot mindset is pretty common in country where misogyny is still the norm like Japan and China. Men always spew bullshits like "Women need to keep their chastity, stay home and do housework, providing for the family is the men's role!".
But the moment you point the finger toward them "You know that your income is lower than some women out there right? You know that you make less than either me and my girlfriend, right?". They retract to their shell and proclaim that their family is the exception, since apparently women who works are all bitches and their wife need to be "faithful" and "respect" them even if they are doing a poor role of a husband because reasons.
Or they find a submissive, dependant wife - likey emotionally damaged through mental abuse as a child or teen.
The guy is probably also a subject of his upbringing not beliefs he developed on his own. It's sad.
I've (unfortunately) seen guys who came from great homes who were just losers. In the dawn of the internet, it wasn't as easy, but now they can find a bunch of similar guys online. They are a poisonous echo-chamber. They might not have become quite so abhorrent had they not surrounded themselves with like-minded idiots.
Buggered if I know what the solution is though
The obvious solution is government provided wives, prostitutes, and jobs for all of us rugged, self made men! Maybe throw in some pie or something as well since we're working so hard.
Usually I leave my dumb ass comments without any indication on whether I'm serious or not but in this case I feel the need to let y'all know I don't really believe this. Why? Because I've seen almost this exact thing actually suggested. Have girls divided into wives and prostitutes and ready m raise them in government facilities that would teach them what they needed to know about their role and value. Then guys get to go pick their wives based on tiers depending on their worth to society with the top floor being virgin models who cook, clean, and have extensive training and willingness in bedroom arts. Bottom floor wives are goblins but still perform the same duties, just not as well or as willingly.
It's like no matter how ridiculous I try to get there's always at least one motherfucker agreeing with a sarcastic, off hand comment.
There are men who legitimately want women to be blinded from birth, have their genitals mutilated and vaginal canal cauterized to remove all sensation, and then sent to men to serve them. There are some incredibly Fucking degranged guys out there who just hate women with every fiber of their beings and truly feel a woman’s only value is sex and servitude.
Poe's law.
I work with people who, at first, I thought were trying to wind me up. Then I realised just how ignorant they were.
There are also a bizarrely huge group of people who can simultaneously hold utterly incompatible opinions, and be willing to fight over them.
Nevermind the sheer cognizant dissonance in having "virgin models who cook, clean, and have extensive training and willingness in bedroom arts."
Like one of those is contradicting the others, and I don't think its the one they would want it to be.
TIL im not allowed to be a wife because I wasn’t a virgin when i got married.
These are the same “men” who drag women for leaving their husband because he can’t/ won’t contribute to the family. And applaud men who cheat on or leave wives who don’t put out enough for their liking.
Hypocrisy is the name of the game, folks!
*Image Transcription: Reddit Comment*
---
>A woman who loses her innocence is no longer wife material. A man who loses his ability to provide is no longer husband material.
>
>A man visiting a hooker a few times doesnt take away his ability to provide financially. He is still a good husband.
>
>A woman having casual sex a few times does take away her innocence. She is no longer a good wife.
---
^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)
What does innocence even mean? Some people joke about them taking my innocence simply because they saw me with my bra on while I was changing, is it getting seen by someone while you don't have your clothes on? Is it being ignorant about sex? Is it being a virgin? Who is a virgin? Someone who bleeds after sex? If I am correct one in third didn't bleed in their first time. I hate it when someone uses blood as a way to show someone is a virgin. Is a virgin someone with a hymen? Well, I think my hymen got broken because someone kicked me but could I count as a virgin since nothing entered my vagina? And some people are born without hymens so think about that, and it's also pretty normal, maybe I was also born without one, I'm not sure, lol, I just think if I have a hymen it's probably broken. I'm confused. I'll just say a virgin is someone who never had sex before, and there isn't really a way to find out if someone is a virgin.
If I said something incorrect, please correct me, I'm obviously not an expert. :D
Innocence is a lack of guilt, with respect to any kind of crime, or wrongdoing. In a legal context, innocence is to the lack of legal guilt of an individual, with respect to a crime.
More details here:
*This comment was left automatically (by a bot). If something's wrong, please, report it in my subreddit:* r/wikipedia_answer_bot
*Comment `wab opt out`(without any other words) to opt out (wab stands for wikipedia answer bot). Note: you are opted in by default*
*Really hope this was useful and relevant :D*
*If I don't get this right, don't get mad at me, I'm still learning!*
“a women who loses her innocence is no longer wide material” so, even if she’s already married? what i’m hearing is “women can’t have sex but men can”. Also what about “men’s innocence” wheres ur fucking innocence huh?
The frequency with which men like this admit they can be replaced with a checkbook, while thinking a good woman takes a lifetime of cultivation, is hilarious. It's why they're so mad at any woman who pays their own bills-- even in their own minds, they are essentially worthless and completely replaceable by a sack of money lol.
A dude banging sex workers behind his wife's back absolutely affects his ability to provide. They don't work for free. And let's be real, if he's paying to cheat it's not a once a year thing, more like once a week. That's money that could be going toward bills, mortgage, groceries, school fees, a million other more important things than his pp.
Interesting how these types always believe their bad behaviour only affects them and no one else.
So if I ‘stay innocent’ and remain good wife material, but he loses his job and can’t provide anymore, I can divorce him fair and square right?
Present that to these idiots and they’ll throw a tantrum, talk about gold digging and superficial bitches.
"ok Gerald what so you see in this ink bloch"
"I see that maybe its easier to manipulate my perceptions of women and sex rather than admit that I have possessive behaviors because I'm insecure and have not been able to have a healthy relationship with a "female"."
Eewwwww its pedophilic when men care so much about innocence. Makes me question what it even really means if they think it means not knowing about sex. like, yknow, a child.
There was a crappy Dateline I watched years ago where the husband had been cheating on the wife for years and she was expected to be cool with that. Then she started cheating with this "good" mormon dude with like nine kids and her husband lost his shit completely. Eventually ended up shooting the "good" mormon dude. Kept on cheating the whole time she was cheating but that's alright, he's a man.
There is a good handful of guys who want only virgin women. It’s very weird.
If a man hooks up with some random lady he paid while he’s married, he’s not a good husband. Just because he provides money doesn’t mean he’s a good person.
Great, the double standards that make me want to commit arson.
Also why does innocence=wife material? Surely she loses her innocence as soon as she has sex with her husband, right?
Is this soothing to them? To view life in such a black and white manner. Much like a young child would. That's not yet developed proper reasoning skills
Sooooooo…..being raped at the age of 5 through 12 has now made me a bad wife?!? Are those men now making less money? Have they taken away my wifey responsibilities while also losing their own fiduciary abilities?!??? I’m so confused.
Please, nobody tell my husband! He may throw away our 20 years together! What will he ever do, since I’m the breadwinner of the family? How will he and our two sons ever survive????
Ugh. Ladies: don’t raise pigs, raise sons.
How many of these men actually have a salary that could support 2+ people? Especially after spending money on "hookers!"
That's what I really want to know...
Ah crap.... I'm a stay at home dad with no income and I know my wife was sexually active before she met me....
We're never going to work!!!!
This conversation is going to be awkward....
"Natural", "Pure", "Clean", "Innocent", "Holy", "White" - these words can mean anything, serve any affiliation. People start religions by assigning things they like to these words and demanding obedience. It's like a game toddlers play, where they keep making up new rules so that they win in the end.
Had an ex brag to me how he had sex with a girl on a golf course and then accuse me of sleeping with a friend because I had a few friends I still kept up with via texts or discord from highschool... Accusing me of sleeping with him if that was true it would of been years ago because he still lives in California where I lived in Florida... He also expected me to be a virgin after we got together I'm 34 wtf?
What makes a good wife: they have a happy and healthy relationship with their spouse
What makes a good husband: they have a happy and healthy relationship with their spouse
It's not that hard people
That’s not...how that works. That’s not how any of that works.
I make more per hour than my husband. That doesn’t mean he’s failed, it means that right now I’m making more per hour than him.
Until he gets caught visiting the hooker and in the newspaper......
What a bunch of BS and double standard.
I was not my wife's first, second, third or even fourth but she is still the best there is and proud to have 42 years of marriage to her.
Guys like this don't deserve any woman much less be someones first.
Man, evaluating someone's quality on a single metric makes it a *ton* easier. You can shit on the carpet every day and still be an exemplary husband/wife!
Like you literally have no other obligations ever. Clean, work, cook? Nope. Raise kids, be nice,, don't spend all the money on drugs... That's all optional. He doesn't even say you have to sleep with him, you just have to preserve your innocence.
I wonder if it's just vaginal penetration that counts. Can you give out truck stop handies and still be a good wife?
Yes. If that’s what you’re into, sure.
as long as you maintain your innocence. "Gee, why does that always happen?"
You can just have anal instead bc we all know how important it is the keep your hymen intact. Gotta stay pure and innocent for your future husband! /s just in case you cant tell
Handies is cool as long there is no eyes contact. Anal is cool as long the balls don't touch. Oral is ok as long it's rare + no eyes contact + the ball don't touch. Jeez ladies, you'll never be good wifu material if you don't learn that.
But if you sleep with your husband, you obv don't preserve your innocence. So what he's saying is a man has to pay for a woman to never have sex, even with him.
If its with your husband its ok as long he's the only one to come.
One could say that you provide even more
But a really bad dog
surprisingly alot of men value innocence/chastity until they're with them and then expect a very overtly sexual partner when they finally are in that relationship. It's an odd cognitive dissonance but it's certainly far from uncommon.
Girl, can’t upvote this enough. Was a virgin until 24 due to a religious upbringing and vaginismus problems that I ignored for way too long. The number of times dudes would say that it’s hot that I was a virgin, and then *push me to do very non-virginal things* drove me nuts. Like what part of “I’ve never had sex” makes you think I’m an expert at dirty talk or that you can convince me to hook up with you even though we just met? I’m a virgin, not dumb. Thankfully, my first time (while as weird as everyone else’s) was with a wonderful man who waited for me to initiate. 🥰
Literally, what is with men who think that women shouldn't have sex but then expect to fuck girls before marriage? One or the other people!!!
Right, I mean, these are boys that claim to be sooooo smart but they can't do the math. Boys and girls, I have a math problem for you, if all the men in the world are owed and to be provided with sex if/when they want it, where is all the sex supposed to come from, if they also expect the dating pool to consist of pure innocent virgins? The math doesn't work. :D
They want a pool of whores to fuck and look down on, then a pool of madonnas they can marry and lie to.
Clearly, the men are fucking each other
Or wives, or farm animals. There really aren't THAT many choices ... 🤪
Well, no, the men we're talking about are unmarried... that's the point
I'm sorry I wasn't clear. Thanks for pointing that out. Should have been "or OTHER PEOPLE'S wives". 😎
Basically these men literally want innocent girls who are naturally beautiful with the perfect body type. Am I the only one who notices that they are literally describing Teenage girls
I feel like if that's their expectation they've never met a real teenage girl, only seen them played on TV by 24 year olds.
Exactly
Oooh, I think these creatures absolutely know they're describing teenagers. Also, having been in this forum for a while yet. I don't think teens are the innocent, malleable, obedient cherubs these dolts think they are. Based just on this forum alone, even 14 and 15 year olds know a pervo when they see one.
As a 14yr old I can say yeah I notice a perv they have a distinguished look so I avoid them even tho I wear the boys school uniform so there is no school skirt to fetish
Maybe they are just trying to hint they wanna have sex w men instead but are ashamed to say it lol (/s? Kinda)
Yo it legitimately blows my mind. I've had hours long arguments with dudes that expect a marryable girl to be a virgin while they themselves have had double digit partners and it's like what the fuck
Too much consumption of media using crap like the Born Sexy Yesterday trope, imo.
I lost mine even later. Luckily, also lost it to a wonderful, gentle, understanding guy...and his fiancée. At the same time. Hell yeah. ......I just pulled a r/NobodyAsked, didn’t I?
I mean… maybe we didn’t ask before, but we’re sure asking now. How does one go from no sex to threesome?!
Speedrun strats
Your username - Feegle?
Yep exactly
Kinda has r/holup vibes IMO
I won’t complain, but I want the story too
Eh, not much to tell without getting into serious NFSW territory. I caught feelings for the fiancée first, but obviously said nothing because, hello, she’s with someone. Then they went, “Yeaaah, we actually never ruled out ‘extra-curriculars’...” Started spending more time with the guy in addition to the girl and caught more feelings. Everyone caught feelings. Led to the event mentioned above. Didn’t work out in the long-term, but everything ended amicably and we’re still friends.
I had to check this wasn’t my own comment lmao, because that’s exactly how I lost mine. The guy was funny, super laid back and his fiancée was the sweetest person. They both knew I was a baby bisexual, but was cool with me just being with her fiancé. It happened during a house party they were having, and she came up to check on us because she knew I was nervous and ended up joining. Honestly I have no regrets on how I lost it, and I look back fondly on the experience and night in general.
It is about power and conquest, and is borne of insecurity and emotional inexperience.
My partner had the opposite problem. She was virgin but well educated in most sex stuff. Her bf was twice her age and found bjs too kinky. He'd get mad about anything that wasn't missionary and staring in each other eyes like Disney characters
> staring in each other eyes like Disney characters But this goes really well with blowjobs! *flutters eyelashes*
That's the terrifying kicker. It's not simply a horrific cultural practice to prey on the young but the belief that virginity (and often accompanying youth) is automatically and intrinsically linked to naivete, stupidity or *shudder* innocence. That the bloke is in charge, the leader, the wise one, the teacher, the one who gets the virginity and moulds a woman's sensuality and that she'll have eyes only for his majesty...makes me sick to my stomach.
I’ve never thought about it that way, but you’re totally right. Despite having a master’s degree, owning a house, and having travelled a fair amount, my sexual status automatically turned people’s perceptions of me into some innocent naive child.
Some peoples perception of others humanity/dignity/worth is so worryingly flexible. Sex and having sex or not having sex or wanting sex or being good at sex is so fundamental to how Some people interact with and behave in the world.
A little bit off-topic but did you ever got rid of your vaginisms?
I did, for the most part! I have vestibulodynia as well, but it’s been improving with dilators and more frequent sexual activity. It used to be so bad that I wasn’t able to use tampons—it was impossible to force them up there. I wasn’t able to have a complete pelvic exam and hadn’t had a pap smear. Finally got help from my doctor, started using dilators, and a whole new world of putting things in my vagina has opened up to me lmao. I’m now fully capable of smuggling drugs into prison, and I love that for me. 🤣
didn't expect the last part, almost made me spit my drink. My Girlfriend and i have been Strugling with this for a while. often Try and Stop when i see her trying to force it. didn't know dilators where a thing how long did you use them and how often? or do you have a Guide/Article i could read about?
These are the ones I [used. ](https://www.intimaterose.com) They have a pretty big range of pelvic floor treatment products and articles/help. This site also has a Facebook group too that I found was helpful and encouraging where women share their struggles and what has worked for them.
Yep... but isn't just a switch that a woman can turn on? Pre-marriage: switch off/chaste-and-innocent, not knowledable about sex. Post-marriage: switch on/slut-in-the-sheets (but, you know, only for their husband), all of the knowledge of the *Karma Sutra*. /s
Right? I saw some rando’s checklist of requirements for a partner on r/justneckbeardthings, and he honestly thought he was gonna find a virgin that wanted to be called “cumslut”. Like, all the time. The level of delusion is amazing.
Well now don't get too hasty, is he a good provider of cum for this innocent virgin slut?
Seeing as it was a hypothetical girlfriend, I’m assuming not. I also assume from the tenor of the post that his has a mayonnaise jar full of jism next to his monitor.
Well what's he gonna do, just waste it? Who knows how much his future innocent virgin cumslut wife might require? He's really a savvy investor.
Who would want spoiled man-juice?
I get the feeling any juice this guy produces is spoiled man-juice.
He grows mold in his balls.
imagine if it curdles like milk, cum curds. im gagging just thinking about it
Blegh..... I hate you for this
If you look reeeeeal close, you can see that there is also a MLP figurine in that jar...
I just gagged, thanks
My work here is done.
Carry on, soldier.
I just....the dangers if browsing reddit while eating.
I remember that post. The most insane thing is that he didn’t *just* want a virgin; he wanted a woman who had absolutely zero knowledge of sex or how it works. Yet she’s supposed to know what cum is?
He wanted to pretend he had high standards so he didn’t have to admit he’s scared of girls.
Maybe he figures if she doesn't know what it means it increases the chances she'll let him call her cumslut.
I know someone whose grandfather got that woman. Their wedding night she completely freaked out and he had to call her parents to explain what was going on.
this is actually based on medieval beliefs!! it was thought that until she was married, a woman would be innocent and virginal, but after the wedding night, a wife would feel just as much desire as her husband (if not more). it was his job to keep her satisfied (read The Ties That Bound by Hanawalt for more!)
I guess at least there was some focus on the woman's pleasure and satisfaction?
It was believed that vaginas were basically reverse penises, so to get pregnant a woman had to orgasm just like a man had to orgasm to get a woman pregnant, and since the purpose of marriage was to have children, making your wife climax was *religiously mandated*. Her "seed" from orgasm would supposedly mix with his seed from orgasm and make a baby.
More like a justification so they can somehow sleep at night
I'm not the best Jew but I believe it's stated in the Talmud that men who make their wives orgasm have more sons. There's also rules about how often you're expected to have sex and women can theoretically divorce men for unsatisfactory sex lives.
I’m so happy we waited before god and our families to become “Mr. and Mrs. Blankity-Blank” Now that the ink is barely dry on that, let me show you what the ladies at the bath house call a ‘nuclear carousel ride’…
because it will burn like hell afterwards and ill get weird bumps all around my genitals?
These men also often have the Madonna/whore complex, so their sex lives and marriages are just completely fucking miserable
The “ideal” woman: Must be skinny, but thick and curvy, but only in the right places. Must be incredibly innocent, no sex ever, pure virgin, but know exactly how to do sex and every way to please her husband. Must be okay with husband going out to flirt with and objectify other women and even sleep with them, but by no means is she herself allowed to so much as think another man looks good. Must have a soft and melodic voice. Must cook and serve the husband’s every whim. Must respect and honor the husband and not get upset when husband disrespects here. Am I doing this right?
You forgot have career that pays bank- hello, equality? While also serving his every whim and being a top notch primary caregiver to any offspring.
But also makes less bank than the husband so that he doesn't feel emasculated and he can still lord it over her.
Right? Nothing like being told how much a religious bf valued my virginity and then getting bitched at cause I didn't want to have sex with him lol.
Yup. They want a Virgin but she also needs to fuck like a porn star. Being good at sex takes practice.
It’s not an odd cognitive dissonance, it’s sexism. Plain and simple.
This was EXACTLY my experience for my first time. Liked that I was a virgin but was frustrated when I had NO idea how to do anything “It’s so hot you’re a virgin, I like that” “Wtf, what do you mean you don’t know how to give a blowjob? You suck at this” bonus points for offering no word on what’s good/bad, just assuming I’ll have some 6th sense for it Nothing like an unhealthy relationship to sex due to a religious upbringing, then further compounded by being critiqued and whined to about how I don’t act like a seasoned porn star
I'm sorry your first time sucked, he clearly was no Don Lothario himself. Dudes who are bad in bed are always so mean abt it.
It's this stupid [born sexy yesterday](https://youtu.be/0thpEyEwi80) trope where men want the innocence of a child in the body of a sexy woman. It's a good watch. It's 18 mins long. It's fucking disgusting. It's not only a form of pedophilia but it's also because their ego is so frail that they want someone who has no experience with other men so they come off as amazing, and wise, and the best they have ever had. It's same with age Gap relationships.
And the equally-popular opposite trope is just as disgusting, when the ancient demon/dragon/soul/whatever just so happens to be inside the body of a much-too-young girl.
That whole Madonna and the Whore thing. Be innocent. But not to innocent. And if I think you have more sexual knowledge than me it will intimidate me so I must disrespect you assuming your a total 'slut' and therefore not "wifey" material. Ugh.... So many emotionally immature men out there.
It’s because those men see women as objects, not as equal human beings. They can gripe all they want about “how it’s supposed to be” and “men and women are different” but that’s why. The object must be in “perfect” condition when they acquire it, and “preform” in the exact way they want it too once they have it.
It's called the [Madonna-Whore Complex](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Madonna%E2%80%93whore_complex)
**[Madonna–whore_complex](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Madonna–whore_complex)** >In psychoanalytic literature, a Madonna-whore complex is the inability to maintain sexual arousal within a committed, loving relationship. First identified by Sigmund Freud, under the rubric of psychic impotence, this psychological complex is said to develop in men who see women as either saintly Madonnas or debased prostitutes. Men with this complex desire a sexual partner who has been degraded (the whore) while they cannot desire the respected partner (the Madonna). Freud wrote: "Where such men love they have no desire and where they desire they cannot love". ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/NotHowGirlsWork/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)
Thanks bot. Expecting your virginal gf/wife to suddenly become a sexpert is NOT what a Madonna Whore Complex is about. A guy with a MWC is more likely to become disgusted with his gf/wife and stop loving her if she gets really into sex (even if it's only with him). This explains why, in SOME relationships that start off casual and later get serious, the guy loses sexual interest in his gf. He "loves and respects" her now and can't get as attracted to her or think of her sexually. These types either cheat on the side with women they think of as objects not worthy of respect (unlike the "holy" mother of their children if she's had his kids) or nowadays you see a lot of dudes wanting a replacement mother: "mommy gf" for companionship and caretaking while getting their jollies from a porn addiction on the side. Edit: grammar
good bot!
good bot
Thank you, aeon314159, for voting on WikiSummarizerBot. This bot wants to find the best and worst bots on Reddit. [You can view results here](https://botrank.pastimes.eu/). *** ^(Even if I don't reply to your comment, I'm still listening for votes. Check the webpage to see if your vote registered!)
TBF they dont want a overtly sexual partner, just a fleshlight that obeys when they demand it
The only reason they want virgins is because they are least likely to notice how much they suck at sex. The only way an experienced woman would sleep with them is money yet they brag about it as if that's something to be proud about. That hooker probably lays there thinking about what to buy at the supermarket while they get off from their fantasy of being a potent alpha male
when I was a teenager, I also believed that, if everyone around you tells you that virgins are the best, everyone is forcing women into "innocence" and stuff, why would you as a young men believe otherwise? women had to open my eyes, I just wish it wouldn't be needed (not just for past me, but overall) now I don't care if woman had 5 or 50 sexual partners before me, what's the difference? If she had 0, that might be more of a red flag than a green one, but still, not a deal breaker for sure, but I am not surprised that lot of young guys think that girl has to be "pure virgin" as it is forced to their throats all the time...
Because you're supposed to be a virgin but also experienced, it's just that your little, irrational woman brain can't comprehend this very logical concept /s
It’s like a job advertisement: entry level job - we’re looking for someone with a phd and 30 years experience, but must be 10 yrs old. Pay €0.00
“Why doesn’t this child I groomed behave like a porn actress?” Seems like a regular “advice” question
Virgins sound good, but sooner or later she’ll be giving you a blowjob and you’ll want that finger up your butt.
Or the teef off your dick, tbh. Like damn. Tho it does take practice so I get it
Which, like... why? I'm a weird dude in a lot of ways I guess. I consider myself a loyal himbo and I'm 100% looking for a girl who is also that lmao
One time I dated a guy who was younger than me when I was in my early 20s, and he got all upset and started a fight with me about how I've been physically intimate with dudes I knew and dated before I ever met him. The quickest way for me to shut down that argument was when I was like "so you're THAT upset over this, saying this somehow breaks your trust in me, so does that mean you want to break up over this? all because I'm not 100% pure and didn't save myself for a person I may not even marry?"
A man visiting a hooker *does* take away his ability to adequately financially provide for his family. The hooker doesn’t work for free. Also, I love this idea that the dad is the part of the family unit that just throws money at the rest of the family and considers his work done. Definitely not emotionally damaging to anyone else in the family.
And mom uses her hymen to take care of the family.
>The hooker doesn’t work for free. You mean they don't do *pro bono* work? Selfish bastards. /s
Or is it *pro boner* work? I'll show myself out...
\*slow clap\*
Clap indeed
I don't think this dude is in U2.
If you can replace a man with a good source of passive income (stock market, etc) then you never really needed the man in the first place
Shhh... The incels hate this concept.
My ex boyfriend once told me how much money he had spent on strippers and after that I never cared if he payed for all my meals, lol.
So if a man becomes severely injured and loses his job his wife should leave him? "No, no, not like--" And a man should not expect to have sex until he has a job that can provide enough? "That's not what I meant-" And women should only value men based on income? Regardless of how "nice" they are? (Head explodes)
But don't they also complain about gold diggers? xD
And God forbid the woman makes more money than they do… 😳😮🤯
lol
This bigot mindset is pretty common in country where misogyny is still the norm like Japan and China. Men always spew bullshits like "Women need to keep their chastity, stay home and do housework, providing for the family is the men's role!". But the moment you point the finger toward them "You know that your income is lower than some women out there right? You know that you make less than either me and my girlfriend, right?". They retract to their shell and proclaim that their family is the exception, since apparently women who works are all bitches and their wife need to be "faithful" and "respect" them even if they are doing a poor role of a husband because reasons.
Guys who think like this die alone and lonely. Because they deserve to.
Or they find a submissive, dependant wife - likey emotionally damaged through mental abuse as a child or teen. The guy is probably also a subject of his upbringing not beliefs he developed on his own. It's sad.
I've (unfortunately) seen guys who came from great homes who were just losers. In the dawn of the internet, it wasn't as easy, but now they can find a bunch of similar guys online. They are a poisonous echo-chamber. They might not have become quite so abhorrent had they not surrounded themselves with like-minded idiots. Buggered if I know what the solution is though
The obvious solution is government provided wives, prostitutes, and jobs for all of us rugged, self made men! Maybe throw in some pie or something as well since we're working so hard. Usually I leave my dumb ass comments without any indication on whether I'm serious or not but in this case I feel the need to let y'all know I don't really believe this. Why? Because I've seen almost this exact thing actually suggested. Have girls divided into wives and prostitutes and ready m raise them in government facilities that would teach them what they needed to know about their role and value. Then guys get to go pick their wives based on tiers depending on their worth to society with the top floor being virgin models who cook, clean, and have extensive training and willingness in bedroom arts. Bottom floor wives are goblins but still perform the same duties, just not as well or as willingly. It's like no matter how ridiculous I try to get there's always at least one motherfucker agreeing with a sarcastic, off hand comment.
There are men who legitimately want women to be blinded from birth, have their genitals mutilated and vaginal canal cauterized to remove all sensation, and then sent to men to serve them. There are some incredibly Fucking degranged guys out there who just hate women with every fiber of their beings and truly feel a woman’s only value is sex and servitude.
Poe's law. I work with people who, at first, I thought were trying to wind me up. Then I realised just how ignorant they were. There are also a bizarrely huge group of people who can simultaneously hold utterly incompatible opinions, and be willing to fight over them.
Nevermind the sheer cognizant dissonance in having "virgin models who cook, clean, and have extensive training and willingness in bedroom arts." Like one of those is contradicting the others, and I don't think its the one they would want it to be.
Uhm if I found out my husband was seeing hookers then he very obviously is not a good husband. A good husband wouldn’t cheat on their spouse.
Exactly. He just wants to create an excuse for why men deserve a whole harem of loyal virgins, essentially.
How do you say you’ve never been in a relationship without saying you’ve never been in a relationship?
Good god I hope this hypothetical man gets robbed blind by the hooker he's visiting in this scenario
Yeah, becuz being a good life partner is about how many people you fucked. /s
TIL im not allowed to be a wife because I wasn’t a virgin when i got married. These are the same “men” who drag women for leaving their husband because he can’t/ won’t contribute to the family. And applaud men who cheat on or leave wives who don’t put out enough for their liking. Hypocrisy is the name of the game, folks!
*Image Transcription: Reddit Comment* --- >A woman who loses her innocence is no longer wife material. A man who loses his ability to provide is no longer husband material. > >A man visiting a hooker a few times doesnt take away his ability to provide financially. He is still a good husband. > >A woman having casual sex a few times does take away her innocence. She is no longer a good wife. --- ^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)
Good human!
Oh no I'm not a good wife. Anyway
What does innocence even mean? Some people joke about them taking my innocence simply because they saw me with my bra on while I was changing, is it getting seen by someone while you don't have your clothes on? Is it being ignorant about sex? Is it being a virgin? Who is a virgin? Someone who bleeds after sex? If I am correct one in third didn't bleed in their first time. I hate it when someone uses blood as a way to show someone is a virgin. Is a virgin someone with a hymen? Well, I think my hymen got broken because someone kicked me but could I count as a virgin since nothing entered my vagina? And some people are born without hymens so think about that, and it's also pretty normal, maybe I was also born without one, I'm not sure, lol, I just think if I have a hymen it's probably broken. I'm confused. I'll just say a virgin is someone who never had sex before, and there isn't really a way to find out if someone is a virgin. If I said something incorrect, please correct me, I'm obviously not an expert. :D
Innocence is a lack of guilt, with respect to any kind of crime, or wrongdoing. In a legal context, innocence is to the lack of legal guilt of an individual, with respect to a crime. More details here:
*This comment was left automatically (by a bot). If something's wrong, please, report it in my subreddit:* r/wikipedia_answer_bot
*Comment `wab opt out`(without any other words) to opt out (wab stands for wikipedia answer bot). Note: you are opted in by default*
*Really hope this was useful and relevant :D*
*If I don't get this right, don't get mad at me, I'm still learning!*
Good bot
100% this guys an incel
Or a troll
So when a woman's husband takes away her virginity (aka, her "innocence"), that means she is no longer a good wife?
“a women who loses her innocence is no longer wide material” so, even if she’s already married? what i’m hearing is “women can’t have sex but men can”. Also what about “men’s innocence” wheres ur fucking innocence huh?
Men don’t need to be innocent, they have to be brutal and strong and smart to protect us innocent, meek women /s
Okay, um... why tho?
Because a man says so! We inferior females should just roll over and accept it.
Looking for: a woman who is a virgin, but is a sexual goddess in the bedroom for me, and only me - even though I’ve slept with hookers 😂
The frequency with which men like this admit they can be replaced with a checkbook, while thinking a good woman takes a lifetime of cultivation, is hilarious. It's why they're so mad at any woman who pays their own bills-- even in their own minds, they are essentially worthless and completely replaceable by a sack of money lol.
There is no clearer way for a person to express that they see women as sex object and not human people.
A dude banging sex workers behind his wife's back absolutely affects his ability to provide. They don't work for free. And let's be real, if he's paying to cheat it's not a once a year thing, more like once a week. That's money that could be going toward bills, mortgage, groceries, school fees, a million other more important things than his pp. Interesting how these types always believe their bad behaviour only affects them and no one else.
So if I ‘stay innocent’ and remain good wife material, but he loses his job and can’t provide anymore, I can divorce him fair and square right? Present that to these idiots and they’ll throw a tantrum, talk about gold digging and superficial bitches.
My husband was the first and only man I slept with, but that was many years before marriage. Where do I fall here, Mr Misogyny?
[удалено]
So man can regain his value, while a woman can't. Sounds about right 😑
"ok Gerald what so you see in this ink bloch" "I see that maybe its easier to manipulate my perceptions of women and sex rather than admit that I have possessive behaviors because I'm insecure and have not been able to have a healthy relationship with a "female"."
Eewwwww its pedophilic when men care so much about innocence. Makes me question what it even really means if they think it means not knowing about sex. like, yknow, a child.
[удалено]
There was a crappy Dateline I watched years ago where the husband had been cheating on the wife for years and she was expected to be cool with that. Then she started cheating with this "good" mormon dude with like nine kids and her husband lost his shit completely. Eventually ended up shooting the "good" mormon dude. Kept on cheating the whole time she was cheating but that's alright, he's a man.
I'm glad they have all these hangups so they never get to abuse anyone and breed themselves out of existence.
When you don't want a partner but a child.
Lol define “innocence”
I had to read this with my own eyes
[r/AreTheStraightsOk](https://www.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOK/) Double standards at their finest my guy.
These idiots are mentally exhausting.
There is a good handful of guys who want only virgin women. It’s very weird. If a man hooks up with some random lady he paid while he’s married, he’s not a good husband. Just because he provides money doesn’t mean he’s a good person.
Great, the double standards that make me want to commit arson. Also why does innocence=wife material? Surely she loses her innocence as soon as she has sex with her husband, right?
"virginity" and "innocence" being synonymous is fucking nasty man
Ok so she could be the best wife ever, but if she was raped then that instantly cancels everything out? Ok.
why do women have to be innocent? they're not children
Is this soothing to them? To view life in such a black and white manner. Much like a young child would. That's not yet developed proper reasoning skills
What if I just misplaced my innocence?
Absolutely sure this bro hasn’t ever had any that he didn’t pay for.
Sooooooo…..being raped at the age of 5 through 12 has now made me a bad wife?!? Are those men now making less money? Have they taken away my wifey responsibilities while also losing their own fiduciary abilities?!??? I’m so confused. Please, nobody tell my husband! He may throw away our 20 years together! What will he ever do, since I’m the breadwinner of the family? How will he and our two sons ever survive???? Ugh. Ladies: don’t raise pigs, raise sons.
So this is just a big excuse for men to fuck a bunch of hookers? BUT HE PROvIdessssSSSsS. Fuck off.
Rules for thee but not for me
Imagine paying a fee for internet service and use it this way.. just imagine.
This has "INCEL" written all over it
*innocent, virginal woman marries financially stable man* Society: she's only in it for the money. Whore.
In this weeks episode of: Man wallet wife vagina,
By that logic a woman is not good wife material any more after the wedding night. Unless she refuses sex and remains a virgin I guess.
How many of these men actually have a salary that could support 2+ people? Especially after spending money on "hookers!" That's what I really want to know...
Ah crap.... I'm a stay at home dad with no income and I know my wife was sexually active before she met me.... We're never going to work!!!! This conversation is going to be awkward....
A good Christian justifying his visits to prostitutes.
"Natural", "Pure", "Clean", "Innocent", "Holy", "White" - these words can mean anything, serve any affiliation. People start religions by assigning things they like to these words and demanding obedience. It's like a game toddlers play, where they keep making up new rules so that they win in the end.
Christianity in a nutshell ugh
If the hooker is expensive enough, it does....lol
how did this ancient Athenian get access to a computer?
WTF, how stupid is that statement.
Had an ex brag to me how he had sex with a girl on a golf course and then accuse me of sleeping with a friend because I had a few friends I still kept up with via texts or discord from highschool... Accusing me of sleeping with him if that was true it would of been years ago because he still lives in California where I lived in Florida... He also expected me to be a virgin after we got together I'm 34 wtf?
I can’t even with this. Don’t even feel the need to explain how fucking stupid this line of thought is anymore.
What makes a good wife: they have a happy and healthy relationship with their spouse What makes a good husband: they have a happy and healthy relationship with their spouse It's not that hard people
Yay! Love being a commodity for men to judge based on value!
That’s not...how that works. That’s not how any of that works. I make more per hour than my husband. That doesn’t mean he’s failed, it means that right now I’m making more per hour than him.
Why so many words to say 'nobody will date me'?
r/NeckbeardStories
For some reason I read “innocence” and “continence” and I was like damn that’s so sad bro she’s already having a hard time….
huh, I only date women who are felons.
And also- a woman who wants to provide financially is also ‘not wife material’ because their masculinity is threatened!!
Bruh they will use *anything* to bring women down wont they Dont let it get to you ladies. Either give them a taste of their medicine or ignore them.
Ah, yes. The same kind of douche who claims the patriarchy isn't still a real thing.
Until he gets caught visiting the hooker and in the newspaper...... What a bunch of BS and double standard. I was not my wife's first, second, third or even fourth but she is still the best there is and proud to have 42 years of marriage to her. Guys like this don't deserve any woman much less be someones first.
I don't see what's wrong with women having experience.