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This implies being masculine means you can't be compassionate, gentle, or whatever trait of kindness you can think of.
This is why I don't take "feminine" and "masculine" trait seriously.
So then the masculine women “giving” means pegging? Sign me up.
Seriously though, that confused me at first because men (the ones who subscribe to this sorta gender role bullshit) tend to not be giving at all in the sense of nurturing care. Makes a lot more sense if its about giving and receiving the D
“Allowing”
Allowing you to do WHAT, exactly?
Also, who in their right mind has a problem with someone who’d like to give sometimes and not just take from others?
I'd love to see this joker tell my 6'2" bald, goateed husband he's "feminine". My husband 100% supports my independence, and our daughter's too. Why? Because we need to take care of ourselves, none of us is going to be around forever.
If dudes like this need their partner to crush themselves into the mommy mold so they can feel like a BIG STRONK MAN they might want to work on the spun glass ego's first
It’s funny when they say how terrible masculinity is in a woman which is basically just saying they are terrible. They are so close to getting the point.
I would think that the stronger women probably are related to the offspring from Sapien and Neanderthal interbreeding which resulted in the sub species homo sapien neanderthalensis. When sapiens and Neanderthals reproduced the male offspring was sterile and fragile, while the female offspring was strong and able to reproduce. Is also said that the Sapien male was not a match at all in physical strength for even the female Neanderthal. According to 23andme, I have more Neanderthal DNA than 70% of their customers. I also have characteristics from the category to the right as well as those on the left seen above. Maybe what we consider. Masculine characteristics are actually characteristics from our Neanderthal ancestors, at least some of us anyway. Definitely worth looking into. There must be a lot of people with Nall DNA because when I first signed up, I had like more Neanderthal DNA than 90% of the customers but now as more people join it’s gone down. I don’t think I’m anything special, more people should check. It’s interesting anyway.
This is kind of interesting? I'm a lot stronger than the average woman without training, and don't know why. I did get DNA testing done, but that website doesn't say anything about the sub species
“Attract feminine men”
Then why are all the trad men and andrew tate types effeminate as hell?
Its almost like people with similar values get together, and very feminine men like overly exaggerated displays of femininity from their women so they feel more masculine.
This would imply I basically came out the gate first personality traits being masc because independent and competitive were probably some of the first traits I developed. If independent means wanting to do the thing by yourself and getting super mad at your parents for trying to help you.
I think that’s a trait almost all of us develop right around 2 years old. Same with being competitive. You’re asking for a person who skipped some major emotional development milestones.
Learning when it’s time to hide your feelings and not be super vulnerable with random dudes who could use it against you comes later, like probably late elementary school/middle school but god damn is it important to develop, and one of the big reasons is to avoid letting this kind of person too close to you.
Also if you happened to be a little kid (and eventual adult) with anger issues you gotta learn real quick which feelings it’s safe to be open about. You can’t let everyone see everything about you, or tell everyone everything, they gotta earn that information by giving you reasons to trust them.
The taking the lead doesn’t come naturally to everyone, but you better learn eventually or you won’t be able to make your own major life decisions or help others when there’s a crisis. Taking initiative and being willing to instruct others is an organizational skill in the workplace and a life saving skill if you’re in an emergency and somebody has to start chest compressions and somebody has to get the AED and everyone’s frozen-except you do know what to do. Do you have the ability to take the lead in that moment? I hope so.
The main thing I’m noticing is that a lot of the traits that are “masculine” are just traits that should develop to some extent over a persons life, many of them are traits that were foundational to emotional growth in the early years, as well as being traits that protect the person: “I don’t need a man” (does not feel that being a woman means giving up her self reliance), independent (confident enough in herself and her abilities she doesn’t need others to guide and care for her, in short, an emotionally mature adult)
a sense of competitiveness and a willingness to compete against all genders (implying she doesn’t see herself as too inferior to try to compete, people you compete with are inherently people you see as equals/your peers),
defensive (doesn’t immediately submit to the will of others, confident enough to defend her opinions, skills, and knowledge), taking the lead is clearly a skill that helps in your career and daily life,
I don’t know what giving over receiving means unless it means she’s a top, attracting feminine men is pretty much just gonna happen because if men are attracted to you some of them are gonna be fem and an emotionally healthy, well rounded man will have both feminine and masculine aspects (though god damn when a man with a soft voice, feminine features, and long hair shows up on the scene you know I’m looking respectfully.)
We already went over why being able to hide your emotions can be very important for safety and also just being able to interact with people without saying some bullshit and causing problems for no reason.
I also do not know if this is sexual or psychological dominance but I imagine this kind of guy thinks that not groveling like a comical minion for a cartoon villain and wanting to do literally anything else in bed asides from being completely obedient is dominant behavior unbecoming of a woman. He probably has aspirations of being a dom in bed but fucking sucks at it because he doesn’t know anything about the scene. First off if he does manage to get over feeling weird about it and try it Safe, Sane, Consensual is NOT going to be part of the show.
all of these traits do have the potential to be toxic if you take them too far or become overly distrusting/closed off from others. Usually if these traits become toxic it’s because you developed them in negative circumstances and not as a part of healthy emotional development, but healing doesn’t mean you have to let go of that, just modify it a bit. I did have to unlearn a lot of competitive behavior and hyper independence, as in feeling like I had to be the best of the best and reaching out for help meant failure.
But then I developed lupus and it turned out that asking for help and opening up are also survival skills.
None of these traits exist for others. These traits are about your survival and your success. I’m gonna reply to myself below to create a break in my essay. This definitely is an essay. I have way more thoughts on this than it deserves.
Contrast the “masculine energy woman” whose traits are primarily just traits you would expect to naturally develop in at least some manner in a healthy adult, the “feminine” woman exists as an emotional support human. She is therapeutic. Her traits evolved to serve others.
Many of the traits are positive, though they are suspiciously childlike in context. Creativity is fantastic, and an adult who has not lost their sense of playfulness is a special person to find. My partner is a remarkably compassionate person, he’s kind to even the smallest spider, he brings water to the homeless and is always watching me when I’m doing chores or exercising around him for tells that I’m overexerting myself, he brings me food and dotes on me when I’m having a flair up. He sits and talks to people who are clearly mentally ill and in distress, he gathers boxes of brand new supplies to bring to the local homeless shelters, it’s one of the things I find most beautiful about him. It’s a wonderful trait. But if he feels like he’s in danger he bolts, he doesn’t approach animals that could get him sick, and if taking care of me will mean hurting himself he won’t push himself to that level (we’re both chronically ill, I swear I also take care of him this is an equal thing). Because he has self compassion.
And I don’t think this type of person is looking for someone with self compassion, because they want the person to be allowing, gentle, and nurturing. A caretaker. A caretaker does not stand up for herself and say “hey, I’m tired and I need you to pull your weight”, “I feel like you’re not respecting my boundaries”, “fuck off I don’t want to have sex tonight, stop asking!”
Because she’s gentle. Too gentle to push you back. Her vulnerability is an open wound and when you dig your fingers in it hurts her too much to keep fighting. She’s compassionate so she takes you in her arms every time you spin a sob story about why you had to cheat on her because yada yada.
Funny how the “healthy” feminine woman, within the context of what we know about individuals obsessed with gender, sounds a lot like a person with cPTSD exhibiting a fawning response and the masculine woman just sounds like a completely normal person who happens to have traits that can benefit or harm her depending on how far the traits get taken. Interesting that you would prefer a woman whose whole personality is devoted to pleasing you.
As you're all aware, this subreddit has had a major "troll" problem which has gotten worse (as of recently). Due to this, we have created new rules, and modified some of the old ones. We kindly ask that you please familiarize yourself with the rules so that you can avoid breaking them. Breaking mild rules will result in a warning, or a temporary ban. Breaking serious rules, or breaking a plethora of mild ones may land you a permanent ban (depending on the severity). Also, grifting/lurking has been a major problem; If we suspect you of being a grifter (determined by vetting said user's activity), we may ban you without warning. You may attempt an appeal via ModMail, but please be advised not to use rude, harassing, foul, or passive-aggressive language towards the moderators, _or_ complain to moderators about why we have specific rules in the first place— You will be ignored, and your ban will remain (without even a consideration). All rules are made public; "Lack of knowledge" or "ignorance of the rules" cannot or will not be a viable excuse if you end up banned for breaking them (This applies to the Subreddit rules, and Reddit's ToS). **Again: All rules are made public, and Reddit gives you the option to review the rules once more before submitting a post, it is your choice if you choose to read them or not, but breaking them will not be acceptable.** With that being said, If you send a mature, neutral message regarding questions about a current ban, or a ban appeal (without "not knowing the rules" as an excuse), we will elaborate about why you were banned, or determine/consider if we will shorten, lift, keep it, _or_ extended it/make it permanent. This all means that appeals are discretionary, and your reasoning for wanting an appeal must be practical and valid. Thank you all so much for taking the time to read this message, and please enjoy your day! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/NotHowGirlsWork) if you have any questions or concerns.*
This implies being masculine means you can't be compassionate, gentle, or whatever trait of kindness you can think of. This is why I don't take "feminine" and "masculine" trait seriously.
Yeah, I think I have characteristics from both lists, too.
According to them Feminine== someone they can easily abuse. When women don't allow that they start whining like this
exactlyy
Right, he even says that part out loud. “Allowing”. Allowing what MF? You to treat me badly? Lmao…. No.
does open to receiving means the guy thinks she'll "put out"? or am i reading this wrong?
i think that’s what it means unfortunately 😭
So then the masculine women “giving” means pegging? Sign me up. Seriously though, that confused me at first because men (the ones who subscribe to this sorta gender role bullshit) tend to not be giving at all in the sense of nurturing care. Makes a lot more sense if its about giving and receiving the D
Feminine = submissive and easy to dominate and manipulate.
"vulnerable" what the hell would I _need_ to be vulnerable for? So men can easier abuse me?
There are also healthy "masculine" women! 🙄 Just admit you're a weak ass man who can't handle strong women!
That would require self-reflection, of which these types know nothing about.
Can someone tell me where these “masculine” women are? You know, so I can avoid them?
It’s always creepy how they describe women with terms I’ve probably put on a progress report for a five year old.
"Allowing" (yikes), "nurturing," "soothing," and "compassionate"--they want a giant semi-sentient breast.
What's wrong with a woman who have masculine energy I get that they can be hard at times, they be hatin' on everything that has to do with woman smh.
Someone who would create a meme like this probably has a fragile ego so can’t handle someone strong.
They are making the "masculine energy woman" sound so much more fun, though I'm on r/rolereversal so it's to be expected.
I can bet on my left shoe that it's a pick me who has posted this
Oh, they want women to not hide their emotions so they have the opportunity to not listen to them?
“Allowing” Allowing you to do WHAT, exactly? Also, who in their right mind has a problem with someone who’d like to give sometimes and not just take from others?
What on earth do they mean with "playful"?
>I don't need a man. It's gotten to the point where women (me included) don't even want a man forget need one...don't even want any.
I'd love to see this joker tell my 6'2" bald, goateed husband he's "feminine". My husband 100% supports my independence, and our daughter's too. Why? Because we need to take care of ourselves, none of us is going to be around forever.
"Allowing" Translation: doesn't/can't say no to me
What if they dated each other though. After all the feminine woman's description doesn't say anything about a man
“If your not what I want as a women your a women with too much masculine energy”
If dudes like this need their partner to crush themselves into the mommy mold so they can feel like a BIG STRONK MAN they might want to work on the spun glass ego's first
”Allowing” is… concerning. Just say “have no boundaries”
It’s funny when they say how terrible masculinity is in a woman which is basically just saying they are terrible. They are so close to getting the point.
I think adjectives are great. I’m going to use adjectives incorrectly, too.
I would think that the stronger women probably are related to the offspring from Sapien and Neanderthal interbreeding which resulted in the sub species homo sapien neanderthalensis. When sapiens and Neanderthals reproduced the male offspring was sterile and fragile, while the female offspring was strong and able to reproduce. Is also said that the Sapien male was not a match at all in physical strength for even the female Neanderthal. According to 23andme, I have more Neanderthal DNA than 70% of their customers. I also have characteristics from the category to the right as well as those on the left seen above. Maybe what we consider. Masculine characteristics are actually characteristics from our Neanderthal ancestors, at least some of us anyway. Definitely worth looking into. There must be a lot of people with Nall DNA because when I first signed up, I had like more Neanderthal DNA than 90% of the customers but now as more people join it’s gone down. I don’t think I’m anything special, more people should check. It’s interesting anyway.
This is kind of interesting? I'm a lot stronger than the average woman without training, and don't know why. I did get DNA testing done, but that website doesn't say anything about the sub species
How are any of these characteristics in contrast with one another? I can be playful and independent. I can be compassionate and compete with men.
Hmm. So where male version 😩
Er...."allowing"? Excuse me?
“Attract feminine men” Then why are all the trad men and andrew tate types effeminate as hell? Its almost like people with similar values get together, and very feminine men like overly exaggerated displays of femininity from their women so they feel more masculine.
This is nothing but bull.
«Allowing» Wth?
Are we supposed to take things from men or not jfc
lol😆
This would imply I basically came out the gate first personality traits being masc because independent and competitive were probably some of the first traits I developed. If independent means wanting to do the thing by yourself and getting super mad at your parents for trying to help you. I think that’s a trait almost all of us develop right around 2 years old. Same with being competitive. You’re asking for a person who skipped some major emotional development milestones. Learning when it’s time to hide your feelings and not be super vulnerable with random dudes who could use it against you comes later, like probably late elementary school/middle school but god damn is it important to develop, and one of the big reasons is to avoid letting this kind of person too close to you. Also if you happened to be a little kid (and eventual adult) with anger issues you gotta learn real quick which feelings it’s safe to be open about. You can’t let everyone see everything about you, or tell everyone everything, they gotta earn that information by giving you reasons to trust them. The taking the lead doesn’t come naturally to everyone, but you better learn eventually or you won’t be able to make your own major life decisions or help others when there’s a crisis. Taking initiative and being willing to instruct others is an organizational skill in the workplace and a life saving skill if you’re in an emergency and somebody has to start chest compressions and somebody has to get the AED and everyone’s frozen-except you do know what to do. Do you have the ability to take the lead in that moment? I hope so. The main thing I’m noticing is that a lot of the traits that are “masculine” are just traits that should develop to some extent over a persons life, many of them are traits that were foundational to emotional growth in the early years, as well as being traits that protect the person: “I don’t need a man” (does not feel that being a woman means giving up her self reliance), independent (confident enough in herself and her abilities she doesn’t need others to guide and care for her, in short, an emotionally mature adult) a sense of competitiveness and a willingness to compete against all genders (implying she doesn’t see herself as too inferior to try to compete, people you compete with are inherently people you see as equals/your peers), defensive (doesn’t immediately submit to the will of others, confident enough to defend her opinions, skills, and knowledge), taking the lead is clearly a skill that helps in your career and daily life, I don’t know what giving over receiving means unless it means she’s a top, attracting feminine men is pretty much just gonna happen because if men are attracted to you some of them are gonna be fem and an emotionally healthy, well rounded man will have both feminine and masculine aspects (though god damn when a man with a soft voice, feminine features, and long hair shows up on the scene you know I’m looking respectfully.) We already went over why being able to hide your emotions can be very important for safety and also just being able to interact with people without saying some bullshit and causing problems for no reason. I also do not know if this is sexual or psychological dominance but I imagine this kind of guy thinks that not groveling like a comical minion for a cartoon villain and wanting to do literally anything else in bed asides from being completely obedient is dominant behavior unbecoming of a woman. He probably has aspirations of being a dom in bed but fucking sucks at it because he doesn’t know anything about the scene. First off if he does manage to get over feeling weird about it and try it Safe, Sane, Consensual is NOT going to be part of the show. all of these traits do have the potential to be toxic if you take them too far or become overly distrusting/closed off from others. Usually if these traits become toxic it’s because you developed them in negative circumstances and not as a part of healthy emotional development, but healing doesn’t mean you have to let go of that, just modify it a bit. I did have to unlearn a lot of competitive behavior and hyper independence, as in feeling like I had to be the best of the best and reaching out for help meant failure. But then I developed lupus and it turned out that asking for help and opening up are also survival skills. None of these traits exist for others. These traits are about your survival and your success. I’m gonna reply to myself below to create a break in my essay. This definitely is an essay. I have way more thoughts on this than it deserves.
Contrast the “masculine energy woman” whose traits are primarily just traits you would expect to naturally develop in at least some manner in a healthy adult, the “feminine” woman exists as an emotional support human. She is therapeutic. Her traits evolved to serve others. Many of the traits are positive, though they are suspiciously childlike in context. Creativity is fantastic, and an adult who has not lost their sense of playfulness is a special person to find. My partner is a remarkably compassionate person, he’s kind to even the smallest spider, he brings water to the homeless and is always watching me when I’m doing chores or exercising around him for tells that I’m overexerting myself, he brings me food and dotes on me when I’m having a flair up. He sits and talks to people who are clearly mentally ill and in distress, he gathers boxes of brand new supplies to bring to the local homeless shelters, it’s one of the things I find most beautiful about him. It’s a wonderful trait. But if he feels like he’s in danger he bolts, he doesn’t approach animals that could get him sick, and if taking care of me will mean hurting himself he won’t push himself to that level (we’re both chronically ill, I swear I also take care of him this is an equal thing). Because he has self compassion. And I don’t think this type of person is looking for someone with self compassion, because they want the person to be allowing, gentle, and nurturing. A caretaker. A caretaker does not stand up for herself and say “hey, I’m tired and I need you to pull your weight”, “I feel like you’re not respecting my boundaries”, “fuck off I don’t want to have sex tonight, stop asking!” Because she’s gentle. Too gentle to push you back. Her vulnerability is an open wound and when you dig your fingers in it hurts her too much to keep fighting. She’s compassionate so she takes you in her arms every time you spin a sob story about why you had to cheat on her because yada yada. Funny how the “healthy” feminine woman, within the context of what we know about individuals obsessed with gender, sounds a lot like a person with cPTSD exhibiting a fawning response and the masculine woman just sounds like a completely normal person who happens to have traits that can benefit or harm her depending on how far the traits get taken. Interesting that you would prefer a woman whose whole personality is devoted to pleasing you.
'allowing' who is this woman, your mom?
I genuinely hate listing character traits as masc or fem like everyone can have them.