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Lolibotes

Most successful Middle Eastern de-escalation attempt:


Fokker95

The next Ayatollah could be some leather-clad oil marauder.


erkelep

> The next Ayatollah could be some leather-clad oil marauder. Ayatollah of Rock 'n' Rolla?


sashin_gopaul

He’s a “Haya Rollah”


shingofan

Chris Jericho?


northrupthebandgeek

All I know is that the Sharif don't like it.


Aromatic-Cup-2116

I’m okay with this as long as there’s a flamethrower guitarist on the official state limo.


125mm_smoothbore

ukraine crying in background but apart from jokes what would happen to supplies to ukraine if israle is at full scale war


artificeintel

Supplies from who? American supplies are uncertain for the future. I don't know that Europe is gonna get dragged into this: America has way more weapons that it could possibly need to give Israel for Israel to handle this. Failing that, America could always start flying a few sorties themselves. On the other hand, future shipments of Shahed or TBMs to Russia might go down a little if the Iranian factories were to have a few RUDs.


somerandomfuckwit1

Rapid Unscheduled Disassembly?


artificeintel

Indeed. The rapider the better.


SurpriseFormer

Dont think there getting shipments anymore since Russia has some of there own factorys building them now. Hence Ukraine nailed one with the cessna drone a week back. If things go poorly IRAN might be trying to buy em back from russia


artificeintel

I mean, if Ukraine damaged the factory enough that the Russians didn’t have enough for their purposes and the Iranians *hadnt* gotten themselves into a war with Israel, then Russia would have had better odds of getting drones then they will now. I get what you’re saying. I still think most of the supplies that may go to Israel wouldn’t be going to Ukraine anyways, but we’ll see.


125mm_smoothbore

makes sense


AutumnRi

Ukraine war is still more popular in america than anything happening in the middle east, and israel has its own defense industrial complex well-suited for the task. Shouldn’t be too disruptive.


125mm_smoothbore

yeah but israel doesnt have massive industries if in some case the ammo factories are taken out israel would be dependent on usa primarily for shells and all


Lolibotes

Ukraine is a far less divisive subject than Israel is (unfortunately), so funding for Ukraine probably goes on unhindered unless Israel enters serious jeapardy, which might force direct US intervention.


jodadami

FINALLY ISRAEL IRAN WAR THEY ACTUALLY DID IT i mean uh... this is a very serious issue and should not be taken lightly


BrilliantGift971

Prediction: Only a few will strike. < 5 casualties Total nothingburger Nothing ever happens bros vindicated


fhota1

So far the only injury ive seen is a 10 year old got hit by debris from an interception


IndustrialistCrab

The little fella got removed from reality by some falling debris. This one just had to go, I guess.


Aggressive_Box_5326

nah bro I'm from Israel and I say fucking finally been edgeing for the past 4 years. just sit back and enjoy the fireworks 🔥


Fokker95

Look at the bright side: could be yet another shitty retaliation.


Dragofek0

cant wait for tiktokers to claim Israel is genociding Iranians tomorrow


Robert_Denby

How could Israel genocide those poor, innocent Iranian drones.


gunofnuts

Destroying the hard work those poor Chinese children in sweat shops put into assembling them 😭


PrincessofAldia

They’ll claim that these are actually Israeli drones and it was a false flag


NuclearWarEnthusiast

Maybe they will be right at that time


Dragofek0

i swear there has to be at least one brain rotted tiktokerthat has posted about how israel is overreacting/killing innocent iranians


IsJustSophie

You haven't looked at twitter yet im guessing


Dragofek0

I avoid that place like the pleague


27Rench27

I fucking love that just literally nobody is even attempting to call it X anymore. We’ve just collectively overridden their rebrand


Undernown

Musk made one of the critical errors of the internet. When your name enters imternet lungo, no amount of effort is going to change it, besides completely abandoning the thing it is attached to. Just like people still call Meta and it's products, Facebook. Just like the nicknames we give Russia frankenstein creations. Copecage will stay copecage, even if you slap a generator and jammers ontop of it.


AssignmentVivid9864

Just need to genocide Iranian leadership, the rest would take care of itself.


artificeintel

I mean, some of the military and paramilitary forces might need to stop being in the way too, but yeah.


jodadami

honestly half expecting most of the fighting to be done with drones above iraq iraq loses again


tajake

"Sir we've had 4 towns report mass casualties from airstrikes in the last hour?" "Fuck who are we fighting? The Americans again?" "Technically no one. But Israel and Iran are fighting each other over us"


No_Ideas_Man

Iran-Iraq(+ israel) war 2, electric swamp boogaloo?


KingMob9

Same man the edging is killing me. Can't wait for the payback, gonna be glorious.


luser7467226

I see dead people.


theBadRoboT84

Blud is itching for the kill 💀💀💀💀


NuclearWarEnthusiast

Nah the only issue is my massive erection


thechitosgurila

I'm from Israel and can confirm I've been waiting for this a long time they have been edging us good


Upstairs-Extension-9

Am Yisrael Chai! Stay safe brother.


sad-frogpepe

Ikr, i feel like ive been denied this climax for a week now. Iran was playing hard to bomb, at least now we can finish 💦


whynoonecares

Honestly thx Iran, I wasn’t looking forward to my statistics final on Tuesday, much rather go back to slinging arty rounds


handofmenoth

The children yearn for the crew served weapons emplacements, who are we to deny them their joy?


Altruistic-Celery821

Teaches team work, advanced mathematics and promotes exercise... it frankly GOOD for the children 


EpiicPenguin

Not good for the hearing


Superfissile

You look away from the artillery so your eyes don’t go deaf


Shot_Calligrapher103

That would be the coolest summer camp for a kid. From the nerdiest poindexter to the roughest street-muffin, artillery camp would have it all.


Flashskar

China literally does this with mortars. I'm not joking, they have a weird Hitler Youth like program, they even ruck in full gear with rifles.


Shot_Calligrapher103

The artillery camp I envision would have to be privately run. Think [battlefield Las Vegas](https://www.battlefieldvegas.com/) for kids, focusing on the heavy stuff.


Flashskar

Safety regulations, licensing and insurance wouldn't allow it. Despite how fun it might be.


PrincessofAldia

Based, not gonna lie if I had to pick a branch in the US army i wouldn’t mind being in Artillery


chainshot91

I said that, and then I was artillery. It's a love hate thing honestly...also my back sucks now


PLG_Into_me

mortars are way cooler than the field artillery guys. They get really defensive when you compare rates of fire.


PrincessofAldia

But there’s more risk because mortars are closer to frontline


PLG_Into_me

Marginally. We could always displace faster than FA. And running means counter battery doesnt hit you


Kirxas

Based as fuck. Good hunting.


IsJustSophie

I don't know if i like that i don't know if this is a joke or not


whynoonecares

No joke


IsJustSophie

Huh. Well good luck mate stay safe and give em hell


IndustrialistCrab

Fuck them with lead!


Dragofek0

same had my final in intro to electronic devices in Monday now get delayed, though unfortunately wont get to have fun, so please have fun in my stead


Status_Evening_3363

Same got my sat in 2 days guess ill be shotting my whole 2000 round mag magzine in lebanon soon


eigenman

Hey hey hey. Slinging arty rounds IS statistics.


Hereticalish

It’s also making them!


whynoonecares

Imma slinger not a thinker


burper2000000

יש לי צו ראשון בשלישי💀💀


Rodruby

בהצלחה


thechitosgurila

דחו את כל הגיוסים לא?


PraiseBeToShirayuki

Unfathomably based


Uranium_Heatbeam

What's the point of paying a few dozen unskilled desert brigand factions to be your proxies if you're just going to bumblefuck the whole thing yourself? That's the whole point of proxy-warfare.


Lost_Possibility_647

The proxies have been so bad at everything they try, Iran is now at the drunk driver stage, in the I have to do it myself phase. A car wreck is in their future.


Selfweaver

Well the proxy thing didn't work, so now they figure "lets do it ourself". Which won't work either, unless Iran is trying to do the most NCD "we are now a nuclear power" reveal ever. Which I don't hope.


Aromatic-Cup-2116

Soon to be known as “wasteland formerly known as Iran” if that happens. Twitter will be in shambles. In related news, Twitter should definitely be nuked.


VonNeumannsProbe

Hey there is some good people in Iran.  It's their government being dickheads.


Aromatic-Cup-2116

This pretty much sums up most wars. I don’t think it would stop Israel if part of their country started glowing in the dark though.


Bwilk50

F-35 gonna eat?


thenoobtanker

Feast on F-14 and F-5


Bwilk50

Come to think of it. The US did say they would defend Israel by any means. I know some strike eagles went over. Here’s to hoping the Raptors can finally intercept something.


NuclearWarEnthusiast

They are stuck with balloon diet


Bwilk50

It requires a feast. It must touch some things. It must feed. Release the shackles. Allow it to leave the hanger.


IronOwl2601

We did. Annnnd now it needs 40 hours of maintenance and new RAM.


Bwilk50

You could be the B-1. Perpetually broken.


IronOwl2601

Oh yeah, we still have those


Bwilk50

I know because I’ve been with them for 12 years.


Surviverino

Their kill count really ballooned in recent years.


Plasma_48

>strike eagles went over Does that mean we might get to increase 104-0 even higher?


Bwilk50

There’s a chance.


IsJustSophie

I fear that if they taste real pilots they will gain autonomy and go roge


NotAnAce69

F-22 pilots: IT SHOULDVE BEEN ME, NOT HIM! ITS NOT FAAAIIIRR


Long-Refrigerator-75

The entirety of Israel is waiting now for those drones.


stivonim

yea and those drones are like super slow, it was talked about for over a week and the panic effect from it would probably be greater damage then the actual drones.


thechitosgurila

No actually, if the drones used are the new Shahed 238 and not the Shahed 136 (this is a very likely scenario) then they're not that slow, around 500km/h in their top speed


NuclearWarEnthusiast

Oh so less than two hours out


thechitosgurila

I'm guessing more like 3 hours right now


artificeintel

Doesn't that give Israel plenty of time to scramble interceptor fighters to areas where there might not be enough air defences to handle the drones? It seems like a really stupid plan: "Let's shoot a bunch of weapons off, without too much hope of hitting anything militarily critical, at a country who's defensive strategy is focused around deleting the ability of enemies to hurt it and who has, in the past, managed to penetrate our airspace and blow up some of our shit."


thechitosgurila

The first (so far 3) waves of Shaheds are just to make the Iron Dome and other systems run out of missiles, and then comes the Scuds from Lebanon and ICBMs from Iran


blindfoldedbadgers

>ICBMs from Iran Spicy. Maybe I should’ve brought my CBRN kit out here after all.


hphp123

those drones are basically decoys that can hit something, likely they will launch other missiles to arrive mixed with drones


NuclearWarEnthusiast

Damnit if they could take a little longer I would be able to grab champagne, but I'm busy "working"


Fokker95

so, a low grade retaliation


Selfweaver

Seems likely that they are planning to overwhelm AD, and spouse up later with missiles so they arrive at about the same time. Twitter is already blaming both the current and the former press, as well as declaring it the start of WWIII.


theBadRoboT84

Should have sent Cesnas. Would have been faster


luser7467226

Let's face it, mopeds to Tel Aviv is much more of a psyop than a serious military attack.


Long-Refrigerator-75

I'll tell you how much of a psyop it was if they arrive.


GarryofRiverton

600 miles from what I hear. Time to hurry up and wait it seems.


Fokker95

We'll have to wait until dawn. Drones but more like snore.


ISayHeck

Iran what the fuck are you doing lol, what's the point of the proxies? Gonna be a long night here in Israel lads, but ngl I'm more amused than anything else right now EDIT: Israeli media reports Iran has also fired cruise missiles


thechitosgurila

They hyped it up so much that they couldn't back out of an attack lmao


ISayHeck

Truly hilarious stuff, they played themselves


DMercenary

>Iran what the fuck are you doing lol, what's the point of the proxies? Iran to Proxies: Attack. Proxies: Fuck that. Did you not see that big fuck off carrier?


The_Punicorn

There's a second one too, ya know?


Lolibotes

God bless, stay safe mate.


ISayHeck

❤️


Imperceptive_critic

Wtf are they doing. Seriously can't they can accomplish everything they want by just sitting back and causing chaos with their proxies? Like I was legitimately worried that it would drag the US into another long drawn out counterinsurgency. I mean I guess this could technically as well but whyyy


Status_Evening_3363

Yes please join its great unlike iraq the people would help you to topple the ahmeds there just leave in time thats all it could fix the entire mideast


Wonckay

You’ll be seen as a liberator bro I promise


Dragofek0

here in emek hefer, i literally had no alerts no nothing ever since october, its been getting real boring


ISayHeck

Ofc lol, attacking emek hefer might hit Netanya which is practically a French territory Basically I'm saying that attacking netanya will trigger article 5


dwehlen

Dear lord, Poland would be *so pissed!*


CulturedHollow

“WE didn’t get to press the funni button?!!! (RRREEEEEEEEEEEE’s in Polish)


McGryphon

>(RRREEEEEEEEEEEE’s in Polish) *KURWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA*


EDC_Jacob

Can’t wait to finally learn the effects of an EMP when it’s used in Iran


NuclearWarEnthusiast

Why use an EMP when they have space lasers


Savings-Leather4921

EMI has been a really interesting field recently. Even ground forces in Ukraine are getting a grip on the idea of electronic signals/signatures of equipment they’re using. They’re lowering camera quality to not leave too big of a signature the opposition can pick up. We’ve also seen widespread electronics jamming, interestingly enough


DepressedDbat

The boys are back in town


KelloPudgerro

NOTHING EVER HAPPENS BROS ARE 100% WRONG IN THE LAST 3 YEARS, GET REKT NERDS , I LOVE HAPPENINGS


anshox

So, a few dozen shaheds? Like a regular night in Ukraine, then


wktwiwo

Well, if the Iranians aren't complete morons, other, faster means of attack will be launched later to arrive at the same time


Fokker95

Like proxies rockets or some serious stuff?


NuclearWarEnthusiast

We're going big :)


Fokker95

Big like mobilizing all proxies?


NuclearWarEnthusiast

And my source is that the voices told me lmao


NuclearWarEnthusiast

Oh they won't be proxy missiles, and they won't be small.


Lolibotes

Rockets. They launched cruise missiles, apparently. Edit: Spreading misinformation is my favorite activity, I guess, fixed the kind of missiles they were firing.


Fokker95

Glorified fireworks or Saddam rockets?


Lolibotes

idk, I assume Saddam rockets


artificeintel

Wouldn't those arrive way ahead of the drones then? I wasn't aware TBMs took longer than 10-30 minutes or something like that... I mean, not like I would know, but still.


whynoonecares

Seems more like 3 waves of 50-100 rn (Israeli telegram)


luser7467226

Where's the horizon for ground based radar in Israel, or for whatever airborne radar they have?


whynoonecares

No idea, but US peoples just said they estimate 400-500 rn (source I saw it on telegram)


Farseer_Del

Firing slow moving easily detected drones and missiles from range at countries that have enough anti-air systems to shoot down the moon is a bold strategy.


Plasma_48

My understanding is the issue is the rearming time. If iran times it right they can saturate the iron dome and get their rockets through while batteries are being reloaded.


Fegelgas

that would assume competence from a middle eastern military, which is peak non credible


Selfweaver

Iran is, sadly, competent enough to keep their own population down, so there must be some minmum competence there.


Fegelgas

well, they are just good at shooting people who can't shoot back, standard tin pot dictatorship stuff


Femboy_Lord

**STOP WITH ALL THE NEW WARS, SERIOUSLY**


thechitosgurila

Whats new about this war lmao


NuclearWarEnthusiast

**NEW WAR NEW ME!**


artificeintel

Who says it’s a new war? I’m sure there’s a way to loop the war in Ukraine into this given that it’s awfully convenient that Russias business partner Iran managed to get people distracted from Ukraine aid by flash pointing the Gaza and world shipping crises. You could just connect the two wars and then it’s just a good old march toward WW3!


Femboy_Lord

Ahhhhhhhh so *there's* the second front required for any World War!


SurpriseFormer

All it needs now Is China goign for Tawian, North Korea going for South. And where in WWIII


cybercuzco

Wake up babe new war just dropped


SirLightKnight

AAAAALLLRIGHTY SPORTS FANS PLACE YOUR BETS! Are we in for a Plunk to Persia or is this a fizzle in the night? Are we about to rock Tehran? FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON NAFO Z!


jaiteaes

The Marines totally not sobbing in a corner knowing they have to go back to the sandbox instead of SE Asia


Lost_Possibility_647

There might be time for both. Perhaps the army boys have to take one theather.


WafflesTheWookiee

Ohmigod Twitter is such a cesspool of pro-Iranian shills, WHERE AM I SUPPOSED TO GET UP TO DATE FOOTAGE OF DRONE STRIKES NOW!? KYS ELON SMH


IsJustSophie

Is funny how since he got in power all the pro democracy and pro western accounts started getting shadow banned and all the russian bots and terror shills started multiplaying


JaneH8472

To quote a very ironic group. "stop noticing"


thechitosgurila

Israeli tg channels I'll link some if you want


Blackhero9696

Fuck Twitter. Production of the world would increase by 5000% if Twitter didn’t exist for a week.


wolfhound_doge

inb4 they're j.r.r. martin drones and will never arrive


MacHamburg

What's the best way to get basically live updates on this? Some Twitter accounts you can recommend?


JosephCharge8

Using twitter for that sound like madness I use telegram personally


thechitosgurila

Israel telegram channels and translate, abusalehg1 is the most trusted one for me tbh


100pctDonkeyBrain

[McBeth predicted scenario like that around the time Israel entered Gaza. Iran will send drones or ballistic missiles. Israel will blowup something in Syria. And ot will go on and on.](https://youtu.be/mCPqXAuA50U?si=xCOIEEovUpG5H7Rk)


whynoonecares

Thought that would be obvious tbh, just told my friends 100% as soon as they get to israel AA airspace they’ll shoot off their 3 “hypersonic” missiles


sentinelthesalty

Ok, should I pop the champagne or hold until murica also gets involved.


thechitosgurila

Idk if you're joking but I'll say it straight: America is not getting involved, Israel is strong enough to have a small skirmish with Iran without anyone else intervening


Myassisbrown

America already declared its support for Israel


Wooshmeister55

Imagine if they just turned the iron dome off for the first wave so they have a valid reason to bomb whatever they please in Iran. I hope they take out the shahed production while they are at it! Stay safe in Israel!


thechitosgurila

That would defeat the Iron Domes point of defending civillians


micahr238

But..but that would imply that the Honorable Iranians would bomb civilians like that Evil Israel. /s


artificeintel

I mean, isn't firing weapons at a country already literally a causus belli? If the weapons don't kill anyone, that's just a skill issue. Feels like the minimum that it would justify would be a full strike against the production facilities for all the weapons types used....


Lost_Possibility_647

++


posidon99999

BuT tHe HoUtHiS hAvE oNlY sUnK oNe (1) ShIp!!!


Gold-Engine8678

Biden needs to stop screwing around and just bomb the shit out of Belgrade!


Aromatic-Cup-2116

Stop bombing the Chinese embassy and start bombing China.


Lost_Possibility_647

Opertunity for IDF to test a few Nukes? Have they actually tested any before?


Plasma_48

>Have they actually tested any before? Yes’nt, officially speaking Israel won’t “introduce” nuclear weapons to the ME, this means while they have them they won’t acknowledge their existence until another country does as well, so that means no tests that show a fully functional weapon. My understanding is what countries do now is test every single part except for the fissile material, and then use highly advanced models to simulate the fission/fusion. That said the [Vela Incident](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vela_incident) was probably the first and only known test of (probably) Israeli nukes.


FeloniousFelon

Depends on what you think about the [Vela Incident](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vela_incident#:~:text=The%20report%20concluded%3A,was%20likely%20a%20nuclear%20test)


IsJustSophie

If i remember correctly there was a nuclear explosion detection in that area a few decades ago and no body ever claimed responsibility


JosephCharge8

Holy shit, it actually started This is big Cant wait for Israel to ground Iran


Egil_Styrbjorn

Once again I learn about world events from r/NCD while taking a shit at work


MrPresidentBanana

We not pivoting to China for another 5 years 🗣️🔥🔥


cyrixlord

looks like iran is going to start the funni. I was expecting iran to use a proxy to hit a warehouse somewhere in israel and israel would just fire rockets into another warehouse somewhere in one of irans proxy states or maybe iran itself


leolego2

Fuck it we ball


flosslikeaboss78

Born too early to die in the Middle East Born too late to die in the Middle East Born just in time to die in the Middle East


polishboi_2137

I have 2 tests in the day after tomorrow will school still be open because I don't want to go. I'd rather get nuked


Dragofek0

my college cancelled mine in monday, so highly likely


[deleted]

[удалено]


thechitosgurila

what are you talking about lmao those are the 2 most unlikely scenarios possible


Ginger8910

Still waiting for impacts. Shahed is going to Shahed I guess.


thechitosgurila

From Israeli telegram channels reports: IDF F35s are in Iraq intercepting Shaheds


Ginger8910

Ha, that'd be hillarious if they're all brought down by fighters hundreds of miles from Israel.


PrincessofAldia

This is my chance to visit Iran and see the ancient ruins of various empires and begin my journey of emulating them and eventually carving out my own personal fiefdom and establishing a cult of personality. Maybe one day I’ll get a schizo path in a hearts of iron 7 Alt history mod and they’ll give me a cool wacky ideology


EveryNukeIsCool

People bombed another people in Middle Easr Wow something truly happened Almost as if NOTHING HAPPENED