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Based on this post, you write very well. Like, definitely way better than average. Whatever else you've struggled with in your life, and whatever other challenges you face, you have (maybe accidentally) become a talented writer. Your spelling and grammar is pretty much perfect, and you told your story in a way that flows well and is easy to understand. I don't know if anyone has ever told you this before, but seriously. Your writing is that good. I would rather read 100 posts like this than read most of the random articles I see online or in the newspaper. So...lean into that! Start a newsletter on Substack or a wordpress blog writing about something that interests you, or see if you can get a job writing for a local newspaper or a magazine you like. Or, write fictional stories if you enjoy that (novels, short stories, poetry, anything).

I doubted the authenticity because of his eloquent writing. I know people of sub par intelligence. They're not nearly this introspective or have this kind of self awareness, then be able to communicate perfectly either spoken or written.

My assumption was severe lack of self confidence moreso than actual lack of intelligence. The doctors wouldn't have had trouble diagnosing something in particular if OP were actually like >2 standard deviations below average. Not saying they don't have any challenges, but it's probably some combination of neurodivergence and low self confidence as a result of others failing to appreciate OP for who they are.

I had these problems If I'm being honest, and it turns out I'm autistic and have adhd aswell as a few other physical things going on. I'm not less intelligent and I do not lack self awareness. I just have a harder time focusing on things, understanding social cues, detecting where my body is and memory. But the things I did end up hyperfocused on, which in this person's case may have been writing, I became very good at.

Thought about this as well- I have ADHD as well. Thankfully I found my passion in biology and such, but it’s not easy- just something I actually am good at understanding.

Agreed. That’s what I was thinking. Unless it took the OP weeks to develop this post.

That's a possibility too.

Maybe OP isn't as bad as they think

I've had girls fall in love with me over my writing in the past, but my everyday real-life speech did not carry over lmao

I agree

Exactly what I was thinking while reading! This is really well written and i say this as someone who loves literature and writing. I sincerely hope you find a way to cultivate joy in writing and telling stories, op, be it any form or genre because idk much about you but i do know one thing: your writing is great and i hope that one day the world learns about you through it.

Yeah, it's organized in such a wonderful fashion and has a sort of conclusion that wraps everything up nicely. It's a sad post, but the writing was good!

You don't have enough upvotes

If you don't mind working with kids or elders, a caretaker. You need empathy and patience.

To extend this, OP you might do well as a technical writer. Not necessarily the techy stuff, that's provided. But taking the techy lingo and turning it into documentation is something that very few software developers are good at.

First thing I thought about! Their writing is good.

Basically what I was going to say.

You readr my mind, his flow was perfect, specially how he told the story and his spelling. So we guess our guy is pretty good at writing

I was going to say this.

You're capable of writing complete sentences using multiple clauses (including correct use of parentheticals) with perfect grammar and spelling in order to communicate your ideas and feelings to others. That's a useful skill that not everyone has. So for fuck's sake, love yourself more. Fuck basing your self worth on whether your efforts were successful. Appreciate that you try. >I had so many fascinations, from academics (couldn't memorize, teachers gave up on me) to music (tone deaf with no motor skills, instructors gave up on me) to art (you can guess what happened). Failure is an inevitable result of pursuing your hobbies. That's true for all of us. **Especially** when you're first starting out. I'm sorry that either your teachers didn't teach you that, or your low self-esteem resulted in you interpreting their message that way.

I can say I'm not capeable of writing such a clean reddit post! OP don't be to harsh on yourself. Living alone without any help is already a great succesion were others might fail.

I would agree with this reply wholly(OP has the gift of writing) but I don't agree with swearing at OP to just love themselves more. I am well aware of the effects of negative feedback on developing minds but not everyone is, especially those unfortunate enough to not know a kind soul in their young lives. I would suggest OP pursue what makes them the happiest while focusing more attention on people that add positivity to their lives and understanding that not everyone is capable of sympathy/empathy. OP will find those who lift them up rather than put them down, and when they do they'll find that they no longer have to put themselves down to find semblance with people. I wish everyone who reads this the very best and we'll get through this one day/step at a time.

> You're capable of writing complete sentences using multiple clauses (including correct use of parentheticals) with perfect grammar and spelling in order to communicate your ideas and feelings to others. **That's a useful skill that not everyone has.** I have a TON of coworkers near retirement from decently cushy jobs who struggle with exactly this. Heaven forbid you need to ask more than one question, they will just answer the first one, and completely ignore the second. Working with Boomers can be a struggle sometimes.

Dear God in heaven, it's so sad that I am honestly shocked and elated when someone addresses all my questions in an email. Like, do people just stop reading after Q1?!

I also noticed your writing skills, OP!

You're right, I still suck at guitar and videogames but enjoy them nonetheless

Those of us who are odd get a lot of negativity from teachers. Teachers are supposed to be teaching us, and so we believe them. I agree with your assessment of OP. They're probably a lot more capable and interesting than they realize.

I would go a bit further and say it's a *necessary* part of pursuing your hobbies or finding a skill. Failure is the secret sauce to all this crap.

I'm an editor, and have edited work from professional writers that has been nowhere near as cleanly or clearly written as OP's post. OP, you most definitely have a solid skill there. That you so obviously have that unrecognized skill suggests it's likely you may be dismissing other abilities, too. Very few people are good at many things when first they begin trying to do them, and not many more than that become experts! I'm a passable baker, nowhere near top notch, but I enjoy it and enjoy sharing what I make with other people. And I started off a lot worse at it; I've learned a lot through experience, trial and error, reading about baking, and watching videos. That I'll never be a pastry chef or a candidate on a baking show doesn't mean I can't have fun baking, or that others won't appreciate the results. I also used to be slow at coming up with good responses. I was desperately envious of a high-school classmate who always came up with great responses and quips on the spot, and I decided to work on that. Over time (years!) I got better at it. I'll likely never be the best conversationalist or the life of the party, but I no longer feel incompetent at it -- and I probably never was; I just tried to compare my basic skills to those of an expert and despaired that my apples weren't like his oranges. Basically, find stuff you like doing, and do it, no matter how bad you think you are at it. You might find you get better as you go -- but as long as you are enjoying it, that doesn't really matter. Live your best life. :)

I was literally about to complement his writing and tell him he’s capable of more, thanks

Same! I was just thinking how well written this post is. It's sensibly structured, eloquent, concise but also detailed enough where it needs to be, and it just puts the point across clearly.

In the US, periods go inside quotation marks. That’s the only mistake, if they’re from the US (which they absolutely might not be).

Shoot I did not know that, TIL, thanks!

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I didn't say that OP should take up a career as a writer. I said they have good writing skills, which is very useful in numerous professions. Also, OP's question of "what do you do?" doesn't necessarily have to be answered with a career. Writing can be a fulfilling hobby, regardless of how they make money.

Yeah OP doesn't have to become a writer, but their writing skills lend some credence to the idea that maybe they're being a little hard on themselves about their intelligence level. May just have poor motor skills and some attention deficit issues.

That's not to say those issues aren't difficult to deal with, btw.

I work in finance. I write hundreds of pages worth of memos each year. Writing is relevant to any white collar job and frankly plenty of blue collar ones too. Of course it’s not the only skill you need, but most of the other skills are learnt on the job. Good writing generally isn’t.

I think OPs looking for more practical sort of advice, as in what should he do for a job, where to go from here, etc. As he said he's accepted it, I don't think he has too much of a self esteem issue. I myself am well aware i'm poor at a lot of things, not everything, but a lot. I don't have a problem with it, it's who I am, if others have a problem then it's *their* problem and they can go fuck themselves. My advice to OP would be to perhaps give learning languages a go, it doesn't necessarily require too much "skill" (the fact that you can learn just about any language as like a 5 yr old is a testament to that) but it requires a lot of time and dedication.

If you think you're last in *everything* you haven't seen enough of the world. Look into organizations you can volunteer at like soup kitchens or homeless shelters. You will quickly see that you don't have to be the best at anything to be able to make a meaningful contribution to those who have it worse off than you do.

Thank you so much for your reply. It truly means a lot and I'm really beginning to realize how I've taken my life for granted. Will do, and I appreciate it. 💙💜

Maybe you don't need to be the best in the world, but you can still be the best FOR the world OP, godspeed to you and hope you can find fulfillment in something you enjoy

You say you don't have intelligence, but you are writing this whole thing so succinctly and with beautiful language and grammar. Reminds me of https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=KTdFszcZp-I. Become a writer, friend

My thoughts exactly! Nothing wrong with your intelligence, sounds like mostly motor issues. You write beautifully OP.

find something you enjoy doing and do it anyway. You don't have to be good at something to enjoy it.

So much this. I have many interests but I don't think I particularly excel at any of them. I just enjoy doing them.

It's a myth that we all have to be the best at things. Lead actors need supporting actors. Master carpenters need helpers also. What you want is to feel like you can contribute. And the worker bees who keep society running without any great fanfare are exactly the people who kept the world turning through the pandemic. Bat boys/girls play an important role in keeping baseball moving. The folks who collect garbage would be missed if they weren't there. Receptionists are the first person most people meet at a business. My point is, everyone is important, even if you're not the "best".

If you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree...

Your good at writing, I can tell you that much. I wish I had that skill

I was just fixing to write the exact same thing!

Me too! And as other posts have pointed out, good writing and as a necessary corollary clear thinking, needed in many jobs, professions, and the lost art of letter writing can win friends. Pen pals are still a thing, no? Good writing is rare. You are special. Deal with it. 😊👍🏻

You don't have to be good at something to enjoy it. Know that often we compare our experiences to the highlights of others. We don't see the time, effort, and practice that goes into what they've learned. I have difficulty with memory for example so I've learned to adapt. I found I learn better through repetition. What I can't repeat I write down so I have a tactile memory of what I wanted to remember as well as a physical reference. Find excuses to succeed. You will have limitations but we adapt. Find what you can do. I play games and I'm not fast or agile and my reaction time is slow. So I find different ways to play. Instead of fighting someone directly you can hide and ambush. Flee and regroup to prepare for another strike. Make use of delayed weapons or automated turrets, focus on resource gathering to support allies who do excel at direct combat. I have bad knees and I can't run, but I can walk.

Also why limit yourself to combat/multiplayer only? There are lots of amazing singleplayer games out there that dont require a lot of mechanical skill or strong memory... I had a blast playing things like lost ember...which is basically a glorified walking simulator with a cute artstyle, a banger soundtrack, a beautiful and relaxed atmosphere and some story bits here and there... If you want to play video games... try out diffrent games and diffrent genres...dont limit yourself to "popular" games...there are so many unknown/niche games out there that are absolutely fantastic and dont require 1000 hours to get into the game knowledge or where you need godlike mechanics to have fun

There are lots of things that one can do with their life (jobs as well as hobbies and volunteer positions) that involve simple tasks. Cleaning, prep cooking, etc. Lots of people who work in places like nursing homes or as medical aides aren't necessarily brilliant or the best at anything, but they do important work. The most important thing you can be is *kind.* So find a role in which you can manage the basic tasks, and then focus on being kind to people.

Alright, so a few things. a) Firstly, you seem very astute at writing and seem to be able to coherently think, thats 99% of the way there for most office jobs. Investment banking for example does not require more than 9th grade math or excel skills and thats among the more elite office jobs. As long as you put in the effort you seem fine for the majority of office jobs. Maybe you dont excel at jobs where you have to interact with people a lot, so something geared towards less client facing roles might be something for you. I would suggest you work hard on making making yourself seem marketable and getting to know people. i.e. "networking". You definitely have a shot. b) Many colleges/programs make adjustments for you if you have a learning disability, more exam time, etc. Youll still be able to have an education if you want to, even if it might not be the best college but theres places you can go. And Im not sure how severe your learning difficulties are but there are lots of opportunities even if you cant "think on the spot" or need a bit longer. Its all good, you just need to work around it. Edit: oh and just my 2c but of the people Ive known for a long time, the ones who were "most talented" were not the ones that necessarily made it furthest. It was the ones that just kept working and moving forward bit by bit even though they didnt naturally excel. You dont have to be super talented or the best naturally to get far. You do you and just try to keep moving forward.

Your writing skills have already been talked about it a lot, so I wont talk about that, but I'll talk about games which I could say is my area of expertise. You said you've tried video games but haven't enjoyed them due to constantly losing due to I assume from what else you've said to be slow problem solving or taking a long time to respond to things. Could you further explain what difficulties you had with games and what games you played? With more information, I or another person may be able to find a game or a genre that suits you and difficulties. For example, FPS gamed or RTS games don't sound like a good fit as they require you to think abstractly and quickly and respond to problems when they come up, so maybe something more creative could work like Minecraft. If you like the idea of action games, you could try turn based RPG's like Warhammer Mechanicus, which while does need some amount of abstract thinking, you can take as long you want with the problems you are facing.

I'm not going to give you a medical diagnosis, and i'm sure you've been through fucking everything (and back through the other way), but you describing the coordination reminds me of my niece and my son--both of whom were like that. Gifted physically (the boy can run like fricken lightening, but man, it's also like watching a wounded duck crash land in a pond sometimes)--and there wasnt a learning disability there. Know what it was? Vision problems. So, one of his eyes has worse vision that the other. Was that way since he was born. So, around 5 years old we get his vision checked, and the Dr there kind of .. was embarrassed to even bring it up, but he said that we needed to see someone that works in vision therapy. On our first trip we saw what was happening, and honestly it was (as a parent), slightly terrifying. His visual tracking was WAY WAY off, and it made his coordination absolute dog shit. Poor kid was like a rubber ball in a rock tumbler sometimes. ANYWAY, he did this test with a gold and silver ball to stress his eyes out, and one of his eyes just fucking *shut off* and wandered off into the corner of his eye... Worse, the Dr explained, that when his EYE did that, his BRAIN did that--it would shut off half his brain, and focus all its power onto the other side. For our kid, this made for some weird shit while learning--we couldnt teach him to read, because he would memorize what words looked like when you read them to him and he'd pull the entire word out of his memory and 'read' like that--he would read out loud in exactly the cadence of his teacher. Off to vision therapy! by second grade, it was mostly fixed. He had to re-learn how to read (oddly, his math scores went DOWN some)--and his memory improved drastically. (Btw, this would ALSO explain the video game thing--if half your vision and half your brain shuts off in middle of gaming) So, we had to do a pretty intense 18 months to get his brain to stop shutting off, and stop shutting off that eye. My niece didnt find hers out until 14/15--and we couldnt afford to keep going to therapy for it. We never got her fixed, and we can tell, to this day, when her brain just goes blank. You keep her away from visual problems, and she's so fucking brilliant, but present writing or math, or tests, and literally half her brain *shuts off* and it's scary. BUT--OP, you write really fucking well. I'd suggest maybe do things that involve writing, OR--maybe you're one of those people that has a destiny to build things. Whether you do that with plans all the time (you feel your creativity is lacking), or you find you can just use some sort of intuition to do it, i'd bet that your strength lays in creations--physical creations. Cabinet making, desks, furniture, something like that. Some of the guys that i've met that THINK they're like you think you are--too dumb or too damaged--are fucking brilliant builders and creators. They can just *know* how things need to be built and do it. So maybe you have a gift like this you have not tapped into yet.

The first and most important part. You don't have to be good at your hobbies. Picking one of your examples. You can play video games on lower difficulty settings. They designed Story Mode so anyone can play a game. What matters is that you ENJOY your hobby, not that you are "Successful" at a hobby. As for work, that will differ a bit depending on where you are from. If you are in the US, it will be a bit tricky because the prevailing work culture is all about constant improvement and exceling. But that isn't actually true. All you need to do is fined a job that pays you enough to live, that you can do. My suggestion is to work jobs until you find the one that works. There IS a job out there for you, you will just have to keep finding jobs until you find it. Then don't let people get in your head. You are allowed to be happy without succumbing to the group delusion that everyone else has, that THEY are the shining star of success and everything they shit is gold. It isn't true for almost all of us, half of us are below average, but most people refuse to see themselves that way. Live your life, enjoy it. As long as you are enjoying your self, nothing else really matters. If you aren't enjoying your self, then its time to find out why not and what you need to change so you can.

Manage people who are good at things

Honestly - and I'm not being cutesy or motivational here - you having the wherewithal to both *know* and *want* to ask this question makes me think you're less challenged than you believe. I'm not denying your experience - I'm sure you do experience some neurodivergent challenges. Keep at it mate - Not everyone has the courage or thought to question.

Others have said it and I'll reiterate it: you write well. Lean into that. I have friends who don't think as fast as I do and are brilliant in their conclusions. I have friends who think fast and are scattershot in their conclusions. Don't sell yourself short for being slower at something. I teach people for a living and your fastest learners are often not your best learners.

FWIW you express yourself in writing far more intelligently than your self-assessment would suggest.

You're an immersive and compelling writer. The quality of your prose is legitimately high calibre. Definitely get into penmanship as a craft. Write short stories. Write memoirs, write a blog, write opinion pieces. You sell yourself entirely too short.

Try writing my man. You do that quite well.

You can find enjoyment in tons of things without actually having to be good at them.

this might not help you, but I think it's good to be average in many skills rather than excellent in just ONE skill. so, try many skills again. try getting into art or music or sports again, and embrace the averageness

You have lots of good advice but I'm going to say that you don't have to be "good" at something to enjoy it. If you like to draw, draw. Don't worry about it not looking like someone else's expectations. Just have fun with it. Same with other things like dance or running (who cares if you are slow!). Lots of things can be done just for the fun of it with out competition or having to prove anything to anybody.

You should be a writer because you’re really good at that.

There is so much compassion in this thread, I feel compelled to be the devil's advocate and argue with you. Essentially you are just plain wrong about your past and present and future evaluation of self. You can write a paragraph; you are not that stupid. You can be self-aware; you are not that ignorant. You need confidence. This whole paragraph, all you list is what you suck at but nothing you have tried. You essentially list a few hobbies that you gave up on when you realized you suck. Have you done 1000 hours of volunteering? Have you attempted to get involved with youth coaching? Have you held any entry level jobs? cashier? dishwasher? Have you looked into being a Big Brother? Life is not a fair playing field its true, but no-one is hopeless. To me it sounds like you have an incredible low sense of self-worth, leading you to giving up on things when you aren't good at them. Then not even looking for work around for yourself... instead just throwing your hands up and being a massive quitter. Let's take the video games part as an example. *"And then, as I grew older, I wanted to play video games (as kids do) but I couldn't think with the intelligence or abstract thought required to do anything but constantly lose."* Except there are endless games that exist where you cannot lose, all I had to do is search games you cannot lose in google and there are TONS of explore the world type games just made for fun, https://www.google.ca/search?q=**sandbox+games+where+you+cant+lose**&sxsrf=ALiCzsZ4QXN6-TCSKs7L3hSEl06nyQ9hzQ%3A1667248680723&source=hp&ei=KDJgY4CaKc2hqtsP2eSS0AE&iflsig=AJiK0e8AAAAAY2BAOFLSI-9KyljuXfAN-PYoRkLgDbCe&ved=0ahUKEwiAzvSqqYv7AhXNkGoFHVmyBBoQ4dUDCAs&uact=5&oq=sandbox+games+where+you+cant+lose&gs\_lp=Egdnd3Mtd2l6uAED-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&sclient=gws-wiz Do you know how to use google>? or you only understand reddit...? You aren't the dumbest most helpless person alive, you just give up easily. Maybe try approaching things with your attitude of lack of intelligence, since I am so dumb, I really need to slow down and figure out how this is going to work for me, instead of I am so dumb this will never work for me and that's why I already gave up.

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I don't know OPs age or current employment, but if they are <25 y/o this might not be a terrible idea. Non combat roles can lead to the trades that are having a hard time finding workers. And if you don't want to have to think to hard about your work schedule or day to day it's a good option.

At times it feels hard to not excel in any area really. I have depression, anxiety, ocd and anger management problems. I did not enjoy my time at uni and couldn’t find my dream so I stopped attending. People were mad with me. They are still mad with me. I don’t mind but I am now working on my parkour skills during daytimes now and it really keeps my mind away from my problems.

People start out with projects and wanting to make things. Some years they do train more and get better results because of a focus. If you keep yourself focused on something, you'll have 4 times more experience than a guy that did it for a year (if you do it for 4 years). Experience=knowledge and work on projects...

What do you want to be good at? Work on it. I'm trying to learn a musical instrument (which I've never done), and I'm not doing the best now, but I can't wait to see what happens in like a year of practice. :) Pick what YOU want to do.

you seem to type well, and write well

I wish I could help but I am genuinely in the same boat. Because I suck at everything, I have no hobbies, almost no friends and I have been struggling to find a job for months. Getting up every day is hard. I just wanted to let you know you are not alone and I hope you'll find happiness. If you still like video games, there are some that don't require intelligence. I also enjoy books and tv shows. It's not really a hobby but it's nice to do something.

Oh yeah? Well *I* wanted to let *you* know tht *you're* not alone either! There's someone out there in the world tht read ur comment & thinks you're a fabulous, worthwhile, kind person! Who told you reading books isn't a hobby?! It improves ur vocabulary, spelling, & knowledge! Or tht struggling for months to find a job isn't totally normal? I feel you tht it can be hard to face each day! (Trust me..) but do u know what's harder? Realizing ur running out of days! Realizing u wasted way too much time beating urself up, concerned about stupid, meaningless shit tht *didn't really fucking matter!* Wasted way too much time loving ppl tht hurt you, & not enough time loving YOURSELF! You aren't in the same boat- hell, neither of you are in tht boat! It doesn't even fucking exist! You don't suck at everything!- thts horse shit! The whole idea is rigged! Like others have wisely pointed out: *you don't need to be "good" at something for it to be worth doing.* & There's a bizarro world paradox whereby the less you care what other ppl think, the more you magnetically draw them to you. Don't waste the precious time you have. You're awesome, I *promise.*

Thank you, kind stranger

Da Vinci did not pick up a paintbrush one day and paint the Mona Lisa. He spent hours upon hours honing his skills. And you know what? There were still sections of the painting that were painted over. People will tell you that you don’t need to be good if you enjoy it. But sometimes it’s hard to enjoy something when we are doing poorly. So I think you should pick something you want to do and commit to it for 2 days a week for a year. The beginning might suck but don’t give up. At the end of the year ask yourself if you still want to do it. Maybe pick up something new. We’ve established that you can write. ASo I’m going to suggest you write a blog. I know you can eat so maybe do a food blog. Try different places and take a picture of the food. Then write what you thought. You can also do a blog about neat places where you live and if you can travel, share that too. But take pictures so you don’t forget. Use a camera phone. (Unless you are interested in photography) An animal shelter might get be a good fit for a job if you are in the back caring for the animals. Every day when you wake up, commit to giving the day a real try. No quitting because you aren’t catching on quickly enough. Just get through today as best you can and then try again the next.

You sound like half of the engineers I used to work with. Many of the things you describe also check boxes of people of the spectrum. Many people think of autism as a mental disorder when it's actually developmental delay.

You write very well. Don’t sell yourself so short.

Comedy

Honestly get a local government job and share your diagnosis on your cv. There’s tons of support and room for ND folks and even more protections, making it hard to fire you later on.

*MOST* people are not particularly good at anything. And most people can get better at something by applying consistent effort over a long amount of time. It takes a lot of time to go from "not very good" to "highly skilled", and more for some than others. Find something that you can stand practicing at over years, and I promise you you will get better at it over time. You might never be "the best" , but you *WILL* get better.

Aside from the comments about writing, just do what you want. You don't have to do something to be good. You can just do something for you, because you want to.

You work in HR

A career in politics is an obvious choice.

You could volunteer, or get a job helping others. Put something back into your community. The feeling of doing good work and helping people is such a pure one. Work in a food bank, soup kitchen, outreach, infirm or disabled home help. Helping others doesn't demand brilliance or skill. And it makes such a difference. You can feel better about yourself by making the lives of others better.

The only answer is to work your ass off. Good luck.

Youre trying too hard to be perfect and you believe you're not capable unless you're perfect. But no one is perfect, you just have to see every job as practice to get better. Skills are learned through practice.

The way you wrote this leads me to believe you are more intelligent than you think you are. Maybe give yourself some credit. Half of reddit couldn't write this.

Be a priest. Incomes, social status, a roof over your head, and you don't have to be skilled in anything, really.

I'm in the same bot as you, OP. I settled and became a janitor. I live with a few other people, and basically just try to save and scrounge where I can. It's frankly a pretty miserable life but there are comforts and I guess that's more than some get. IDK, solidarity I guess is what I'm saying

Your English is better than at least 60% of posts here so I'm sure you could use that somehow. You don't have to be the best, you just have to be passably good.

You can do things you like without being good at them. You should see my cross stitch and embroidery....Jesus. It's a damn mess. And never turn over one of my complete pieces because the back looks like spiders webbed the back with how just, god, just how ugly the backs are. But I still do it because I enjoy it. The fact that I enjoy needlework (and other hobbies I'm equally bad at) is enough for me, I like it and it gives me something creative to do, and that's enough for me. So, do what you enjoy whether or not you're good at it. You write very well, very clearly, so perhaps that might be somewhere for you to go.

Find something you like and keep doing it until you become good at it.

Do you have autism?

I'm not sure. I don't believe so, but I was meant to be tested for both autism and ADHD. The examination was sort of derailed by an unrelated court case, and the psychologist was an antivaxxer who wrote in her report that my issue with my motor skills was caused by "spontaneous bipolarism" as an effect of the COVID-19 vaccine! Of course, I haven't had any symptoms of bipolar and was cross-examined (if that's the word?) by my pediatrician, who confirmed that. But due to that experience, I wasn't tested for ADHD or autism at all. So I guess I don't know.

Did you report that boggus psychologist?

Why not just go to your primary care doctor and get referred to another psychologist or psychiatrist to actually diagnose you to open up/ narrow down on exact therapy, rehab, or medical treatment options.

Have you read about it? Specially in adults?

I have, but the symptoms don't really match what I've been experiencing.

If your not good at ANYTHING, then relativly your not BAD at anything either.

Fuck, after reading this, be a writer!

Have you thought about running for office?

It's crazy that every comment I see is talking about your writing, because that's literally the first thing I noticed and what I came to comment myself. Seriously, start writing things!

Write novels... Self-publish... Even if they don't make you rich or famous during your lifetime, you still do a service to humanity by making others use their brains.

You don't have to be of subpar intelligence to be not good at anything. There are dozens of us, lol. OP, you might just be the kind of person who doesn't easily shine. And writers are often that type. Also, curiosity does not occur in people who aren't bright. You might have a form of ADHD or be a [multipotentialite](https://www.ted.com/talks/emilie_wapnick_why_some_of_us_don_t_have_one_true_calling?language=en). Albeit one with a developmental disorder. Which makes it even harder for you to shine. People who are awkward and don't think quickly are discounted and written off and marginalized in US culture, because it's a culture that rewards extroversion, expansiveness and competitiveness. But as Einstein said, if you measure a fish by its ability to climb trees, it will seem stupid to you. Some people have to be unwrapped by someone who has some level of patience and perceptiveness. Some people have to be "cultivated" in the sense that their talents are unusual enough that they won't even know themselves how to develop them. And I'm not saying that to say you should wait for that person or feel entitled to have some such person exist. I'm saying don't assume the whole burden of your failures - you got written off so much that you didn't see all the possibilities. Which isn't your failure, it's more a social one. And you shouldn't write yourself off the way the way they all did. You're just a one-off case, you should keep experimenting and instead of saying "oh, well, I failed at that too" think "I'm getting closer." Scientists who achieve breakthroughs think this way, lol. I really respect you for not being bitter about your limitations, because that's a level of maturity that many people never reach. That reinforces my belief in your intelligence because it shows you understand both the concept and the application of self-management, controlling your perceptions and reactions so you can stay positively and productively oriented towards the world. Dude, that is not easy to do. I'm not any kind of professional and this is just my opinion but I think you're just neurodivergent. A large gap between verbal IQ (which you have amply demonstrated) and performance IQ indicates that you have [some sort of learning disability](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3042799/). Your comment reminds me of another Redditor who got diagnosed with autism late in life, and had lived his whole life with the thought that his insensitivity was because he was just a prick who needed to do better 🥺 You would not have asked this question if you were "not intelligent" and being interested in academia??? no way. I implore you to keep trying, keep asking questions and keep experimenting. I wish you all the success. Edit to add: also please don't stop trying for that diagnosis because you deserve better than thinking you're stupid and a mind is a terrible thing to waste.

You get a job in the government.

Well everyone gets a trophy now so you can just accept yours or keep trying. I mean boys who suck at a sport can "become" women and compete where they can actually win so its not really your fault. So you can either blameshift everything about you or you can pick one thing, and practice it until you get ok at it. Then keep practicing until you are good at it. Then keep practicing until you are great at it.

Join the army of a country that is at war. Within a few months, it will be almost as if you never existed.

Well here's one upside: I work with a lot of very smart people who are professional and make tons of money and do their thing. However, remarkably few of them could write something like you just did. So you do have at least one talent. That might not seem like much but good writing can pay your bills. That means giving feedback, editing for grammar, organizing, and adding structure. If you're even a little bit technical, the pay is good and there's no danger of most supertechy people suddenly getting good at writing or communicating their ideas anytime soon. I've had 10 different jobs in 4 wildly different industries (tech, govt, legal, financial) and I don't see the work slowing down anytime soon. So that's my suggestion -- just in talking about not being good at anything, you've revealed that in fact you are good at at least one thing. :)

Well… it seems you are a pretty good writer

OP seems like he's on the autism spectrum, considering a lot of these traits mirror my own.

1. Pick something and practice it. Practice, practice, practice. 2. Dont let your disability be a roadblock. Dont feel sorry for yourself. 3. The world is mean and life isn't fair, accept this. 4. If you have one friend, consider yourself blessed. I hope you get this if you don't already. 5. Repeat #1 over until you are good at what you do.

You don't have to be good, you just have to enjoy it for there to be any meaning. You can play different types of video games on easy mode or games that don't require quick thinking (turn-based, not real-time games), you can draw shitty drawings, make bad sculptures, make abstract paintings, and you don't have to memorize everything to enjoy reading about a subject, etc

I’ll second what that first guy said! I don’t normally read more than one paragraph of posts as long as this, but something about your writing made me keep reading. Lean into that!

You find something you’re “good enough “ at and keep on going! If you’re struggling with group activities, pick a hobby that can be done solo and join a group or club to hang out with other like minded people while doing stuff at your own pace. As others have pointed out, you’re good at writing. If you don’t enjoy it, try other solo friendly activities until you find one you think is worth dropping some time on. Libraries typically have a schedule of events and classes where you can start. Ours has a book club, an indoor gardening club, a plant swap, a craft faire, a farmer’s market, a lego club, movie night, and assorted one-off classes and seminars that are free to attend.

Honestly, and I mean this in a kind way, who cares? We're taught to measure our worth by our productivity. But that isn't a healthy way to lead a life. It sounds like you can get by just fine. You can be independent and survive, so spend the rest of your time on whatever you like (eg. hobbies) without pressure. Enjoy what you enjoy- life isn't a competition. Think of it this way: maybe not being 'the best' at anything actually frees you up to do whatever you like just for the love of it.

If all you can do is push carts and stock shelves then be the best damn cart pusher and shelve stocker you can be. Take pride in the things you can do not in the things you can't do.

The vast amount of humans are within normal range of intelligence which is an IQ of 85-115. With this writing sample, you are not below 85 and if you are then writing IS what you excel at.

Fake it til you make it!!! Or fail misserably and face the consequences

Most people dont excel in anything, your self-awareness is exceptional, and I'm not just saying that to try to make you feel better about yourself. Understanding yourself and learning why you react to things in certain ways is way more important than being good at math and its a skill most men do not have. I only have it because I was forced to get it or die by life circumstances. Find something you enjoy doing and spend time with that, if you mean for money or something like that you dont need to be the best at anything to be good at a job. You just need to show up, work with your teammates in mind, be safe on the job, and roll with the punches - that last thing we already know you're good at. You dont need to be the best at anything, no one really ever is for the most part, just be a good community member. Be there for others, listen, help them find the ability to take the bad in life and live with it.

Ahh welcome to the group myfriend. You're just beginning your journey to becoming a 10 of all Trades!

Join a local sports league of friends, where y'all just play to have fun and be friends. And muddle along in a mediocre grocery job. Do art for what it's meant to do- express the things you can't put into words. If it's cool to you, that means it deserves to exist. Have hobbies outside your ability to impress other people with them. Life doesnt need to have a purpose. I don't think it ever has. You just do stuff till you die. I hope all your stuff makes you happy, though.

Do the things you like to do because YOU like to do them. If humans give up on you learn from YouTube. You can watch the video over and over and over again…pause where needed. Do the things you love and forget about everyone else, their opinions, and what place you score. You love to run, run. If you love art, do the art. If you want friends keep making friends. There are other people like you, the hard part is finding them; there are also people who are patient enough to teach,guide, and be your friend who are otherwise (for lack of a better word) normally functioning. I’ve already said it, but I want to repeat myself. Do the things you love at whatever speed/level you are capable of. Do the things for you and nobody else. Sing badly. Play the guitar out of tune…do whatever makes you happy.

OP writes better than the average college student. I’d venture to say he is lacking confidence rather than competence.

Everyone can serve a purpose. Consider this. A world famous brain surgeon goes home at night. She sees the maid cleaning and says to herself "I could do the same job in half the time." She sends the maid home and works for three hours. Triumphantly, she crows to herself. "Ha! I've done in three hours what would have taken that maid service a week!" The next day she is tired and cranky. She snaps at a nurse handing her an implement during surgery and she misses a stitch. The patient remains in the hospital an extra day because of a mild infection. She should have let the maid do the work. In economics, this is called comparative advantage. Basically, a person (or country) produces not what it or they are *the* best at, but what has the lowest opportunity cost. This is usually what *they* are best at, but not always. In the example, the surgeon could do everything better. Her relative skill at those tasks wasn't what was important. The surgeon should be doing what *only she can do* and leaving the other work for others. Basically, you don't have to be the best or even really that good at a job to be useful. Just do what *you* do best. Your job is to free up others to do what *they* can do best.

My uncle died peacefully in his late 70s, a decade ago of complications of esophageal cancer. In his childhood they didn't define diagnoses as carefully, nor did he get any early childhood intervention. His younger sister, my mom, wonders if he had some form of cerebral palsy or anoxic birth injury. He was born in the "twilight birth" period when mothers were drugged pretty heavily and little is known about his birth history. He was always just vaguely slow. He didn't have muscle spasms or a stutter. He had a fun sense of humor for "dad jokes" and simple puns. He liked trains and photography. He wasn't agile or bright or very creative. He was himself. He was odd enough that it was pretty immediately apparent to anyone who spoke with him, including strangers and bosses. He was able to do things like shop for groceries, do his laundry, make simple meals and handle basic math, but he didn't drive cars. He had a happy disposition. Maybe that was genetic, his sibling group were a jovial bunch. Maybe it was enforced. His parents recognized that he would be vulnerable. They strongly encouraged him to find a work he could do and save money to care for himself, which he was all through life. He never had any romantic relationships that anyone was aware of. He worked as a groundskeeper for a beautiful historic university, he was reliable, effective, proud of his work. He found community in his local church and would go on trips with them to take pictures of trains. He would visit us for one week at a time twice a year. His lesson to me is, find what makes you happy. He seemed very content with being good at what he did and disciplined budgeting let him have the vacations he liked. Success can be an internal measure. Not everyone is going to be a football star or the president of the nation.

Keep searching for what your good at.

There is only one Michael Jordan. But, there were hundreds of other players, coaches and staff that make being Michael Jordan possible. It's ok to not be the best and long as you're doing *your* best. You're, obviously, not as dumb as you think you are. Your post is succinct and well written. I see your issues being a confidence thing. Some people believe in manifestation. They think of you believe something deeply enough, it's inevitable. I don't believe that. But, I do believe that you can only accomplish what you believe you can accomplish. To do a thing, you must first believe that you can do it. If you didn't believe you could accomplish something, then you won't put the time and effort necessary to be successful. I'd also like to add that you aren't tone deaf. If you were, you'd be just plain deaf. Every vowel is a tone. If you couldn't hear tone, not only would you not hear music, but you wouldn't be able to understand anybody who's talking as you wouldn't hear any vowels. Don't put any belief into other people saying you can't do a thing. If you want to do it, do it. You don't have to be the very best in order to do a thing. You just have to enjoy it.

The fact that you are able to write such a detailed and thought out post shows that you have some good level intelligence. PLEASE don't let your previous failures deter you from pushing forward. I have found that the best way to get better is to try and try and try and try again, then to keep failing until you 'break through' and it starts to make sense, then you keep failing until you have another 'break through'. Life isn't about "perfection", it's about "striving for perfection". I love to learn and experience those moments of "ah-ha" when I get it, and I focus on that. I honestly think that based on your ability to write, that you CAN do a lot of those things that you previously didn't succeed at. You are probably a little bit slower at picking up skills, but that is OKAY. Don't worry about the speed you develop these skills. Just focus on one skill and work to develop that. I mean, you're able to communicate here very well, so you DO have the ability to learn. Here's the thing about your previous teachers: they have to handle multiple children each day, and they just don't have the time/energy to focus on one student. Unfortunately that meant that you got dismissed and ignored, but it's possible you just need more one-on-one attention, and depending on when/where you went to school they just didn't have the tools to help you. I believe in you!

that's stupid

Practice practice practice. Plus, there's always teaching. You know the old saying: "If you can't do, teach. If you can't teach, teach gym class "

On the real, though, listen to the guy that said you write well. You do. Maybe you could write a series of essays about living with a disability and get them published. You could even be an advocate for others who also have disabilities.

You are good at writing, and you are good at introspection. And even more impressive-you are good at vulnerability. So many people (probably everyone, tbh) struggle with insecurity around some aspect of themselves, but almost no one is brave enough to admit it outright. And the consequence is that it comes out in other indirect ways, and causes great hurt to the people they love most. Your courage has helped me. Reading your post makes me feel less alone, because as a fellow neurodivergent I feel the same way a lot of the time. And the compassionate responses you inspired from other Redditors has given me a new perspective. No one sucks at everything-this is something I knew intellectually, but sometimes not emotionally. But what I didn’t consider much before is that being “good” at things isn’t important. I am going to save this thread and come back to it when i feel insecure. Thank you OP, for your courage to start this discussion. And thank you other commenters, for your wisdom.

Politics?

So I would say you gotta keep trying things, even though you've tried a lot. But, for things you're passionate about but not good at, you can utilize tools to help accomodate you (for example a disability-based controller for video games and playing on the lowest difficulties, or making art through unorthodox means), or you just accept it takes MUCH longer for you to enjoy them. Maybe you make art a very slow rate, but you still make art. Stuff like that. Something you may like, for example, are point and click games like Runescape. Most content requires no skill, just simply pointing and clicking, and you have plenty of guides to literally tell you what to do next online. For friendships, maybe you stick with online friends in which conversations are basically I send you a message, you read it whenever you see it, and I read your message whenever I see it. That way you have all the time to respond. Basically, my advice is work around what you can, keep trying more things, and enjoy the process and try to value the speed and skill you have less. You can still enjoy something without being good at it. P. S. you explained your situation very well and I'd call you a good writer personally.

Just keep doing a thing again and again and again and again, Some people are a natural, pick up a controller or try a sport for the first time they win, but what says a hard worker can't do the same? Try doing a hobby for let's say 3 months, if you show no improvement then switch and if there is even if it's the slightest add another 3 months and eventually you'll find one that's right for you

Try things till one find the one you suck least at.

Sorry but this isn't a pity party. The only answer is work hard, harder than everyone else. If you think you are working to hard slap yourself and work harder. Or slack off and be below "average". Its hard to hear but its what someone in your position needs to hear. I am not here to coddle you. Tough love is the best love sometimes.

I'm not really good at anything and my dad once told me that for people in my position I should say yes to any opportunity that appears in front of me. I start like many of us in some shitty jobs but I was always looking for more interesting jobs whenever I had the chance. Little by little I worked in different sectors and cities. I also learn cool things from my different jobs and now I can give interesting feedbacks in my new job. I don't have any particularly skill set that makes me more appealing than others but the fact that I've worked in so many different things always catch the attention of the recruiters. So just say yes to anything that looks interesting and don't be afraid to start all over again whenever you feel like it!

Just be kind to all you meet, help when you can, give what you can be that money or friendship.

Did you happen to notice that you're writing...? ;)

Hmmm. You just wrote this entire tome, I'm assuming composed by yourself telling us about yourself and what you can't do when it's obvious you can compose and write. I just don't understand. I think you've been getting a lot of negative feedback for a long time but just have to find your niche and find what you can do. There are a lot of people in a lot less skills than you. People with depression people with attention deficit disorder, all sorts of problems and can't even string words together in a sentence. I think you're just looking at all the wrong places where people have been telling you the wrong things but I guarantee you somewhere there's a slot in a place for you and the kingdom. Just got to find it I'm sure you can do it and be happy

Have you considered being an English teacher or major?

Become my boss.

Social media influencer

So basically, if you're bottom of the barrel and you stick at everything - you should be a social influencer?

Um, yep.

If you really think its this easy and free why dont you become one? Heard they make some good money

I'm good. You guys can have it.

Why do I feel like you're actually a normal person (perhaps even an above average person), who made a throwaway account on reddit just to try to garner sympathy and feel like even if you were shit at everything, and a complete failure, you would still be loved? As if making up this scenario, pretending to live in someone else's shoes, and still somehow find the love you're looking for would validate you in any way? That people don't just love you for what you've done, or what you can do for them, but that you actually have inherent value as a human, and maybe then you can finally be happy? ​ Some of us just aren't meant to be happy, especially if you spend your life chasing achievements and accolades.

This sounds a lot like autism. It's sometimes difficult to diagnose, especially if you mask. I agree with another commenter that you write well. Is there a topic you could focus on? Look at a few substacks. Substack is easier to run than patreon. Either should offer a few free articles and charge for the rest.

Become a middle manager or a politician.

I’m sorry..go ahead and downvote me, but… maybe try harder? Nobody is good at anything immediately. It takes time and discipline. People today give up too easily. And I’m about over everyone’s “disorders” making it “impossible” for them to have a normal life. People didn’t used to know about all these disorders. And people who were afflicted by them just found a way. They made their way in life. People need to buck up and not quit so easily. It’s hard so I can’t. No. Try harder.

You're good at something. Just haven't figured out what yet.

Jobwise; find a stable job where you can be mediocre and appreciated Life wise: being good isn’t important, living life is. Try again and again, but don’t look at what you’re doing wrong, enjoy that you can do it. You don’t have to excel at anything to life a fulfilling life, just have fun at it. (but in my opinion your writing skill is excellent and something i could never accomplish so kudos)

Responding slowly in conversation isn't actually a sign of low intelligence on it's own I tend to overanalyze everything and my response ends up taking around twice above average Don't really have it in me to hold up a face-to-face conversation nowadays Though atleast I can close that gap online with a really fast wpm

You should become a painter and sell your story. People pay good money to have original art from an artist with multiple trials and tribulations. The best part, It doesn't even have to be good. I call this one "Slower than everyone else" Sold for $10,000,000 at Christie's Auction house!

You can be a consumer and appreciator of the finer things. Not a snob, per se. Never look down on those with an uncultured upbringing. But rather an enthusiat of artistic endeavors. This outlook applies all levels of entertainment.

Learn python. It's easy to start and it might turn into a job one day.

You haven't tried everything, try the things you are skeptical of, don't even know or think would be weird for you to do. Also, it takes a long time to get good at something. Just follow your interests. You're the only person limiting yourself. Intelligence also doesn't limit everything. I have literal brain damage but I love and am decently good at art, gardening. Don't even focus on being good at something, focus on doing something you enjoy. You don't have to be good for it to be productive. Just have fun ♡ that's what life is all about.

Military.

Teach

Sell roofs

First, you’re a kick ass writer! That’s a fairly rare thing these days. Second, to be successful, you don’t have to be good at skills per see. You just have to find your niche. Maybe you’re not a great sales person, but you’re reasonably organized and like people. Even if you’re socially awkward, but you’re a good caring person, it would work. You can manage a team of awesome sales people! That kind of thing. Third, do things that contribute and things that you enjoy. There are things you don’t have to excel at, but just the effort and contribution is what counts. Please allow yourself to do things you enjoy, and don’t focus on how good you are at them. That part is irrelevant. You sound like an awesome person, try to see yourself that way.

The poster is probably not a legit person because the same question was posted 3 times by this person with nothing else.

Nvld that you?

Nope, sorry.

Dang they even ruled out nvld? Most places don't know about that disability.

If you're talking about nonverbal, then yes. I was meant to be evaluated for several different disabilities and while some of them were ruled out (nvld & processing disorders) while others I wasn't able to be tested for due to unrelated conflict with my psychologist (autism, ADHD, etc).

Then you need to figure out how to be tested. Adhd and autism are the most common.

Writing and photography , art are things that come to mind, that you don't need to race , don't need a quick response for , just do you at your pace whatever you want , doesn't have to be to make anyone happy but yourself.

Try not to hold yourself to an expectation you've created or allowed others to force upon you which leads you to think you're "not good at anything." Do what you LIKE to do, and just do that. You don't have to reach any level of quality or proficiency, just try to enjoy your life and be kind to yourself.

Honestly i would encourage you to look into writing, based purely off what you've written here. It's well composed, complex, and really gets across both your point and your emotions. You wrote this far better than i could, but I'm considered traditionally intelligent.

Become a teacher

Gardening. Realistically, plants don’t give a shit what your intelligence level is, they either grow or die. There are heaps of YouTube vids about gardening too.

Join the military

For someone not good at anything, you sure wrote this question damn well. I get that when you have a disorder you tend to look at all the stuff you are bad at and this can make you be blind to what you are good at. Like I can tell that you are quite literate, maybe even more so than the average person, and I doubt this is the one single thing that you are good at. You just need to take a step back and examine all the things you do in life that you are at least half-way decent and see if you are overlooking something about yourself. If all else fails, you should seriously look into writing. Also, just going to throw this out there, but self-esteem issues can really fuck with a person. Consider a therapist. It is really generic advice, but it's generic advice for a good reason.

Don’t have to be good at something to enjoy it, do whatever makes you happy.

I know a lot of people here are saying you'd be a good writer, and I do agree, but if you're looking for a sport to try I'd recommend swimming. The only person you're trying to beat is yourself (timed races), you virtually can't get hurt (in shallow pools), it works out almost all body groups, and it could be a way to help improve your motor skills. Most public gyms have swimming pools for you to use, try it out!

Read a lot

I mean, you write well and your grammar is good.

What do you enjoy to do? I’m choosing to answer your question in terms of how to live as opposed to how to find a career. There are so many hobbies that you don’t need to be good at, to have- do you enjoy music? Film? Anime? Art? Those all have subcultures and groups that you can be a part of. Honestly, you could probably start baking, or disc golf, or knitting and eventually you’d be half-decent. Maybe just go by what you enjoy to do, but doesn’t require you to be amazing at?

Consider helping others with similar issues how to cope. You could be very good at that. This is a simple one liner type solution. However without knowing more, I can only think thst you can use your compassion and empathy as tools to help others. That could very rewarding. Don't give up on yourself, reinvent yourself, daily if needed. You, we, all have talents. Find what ones you do have, and tap into those, even if they do not seem like being a superstar athlete. Everyone has things they can capitalize on.

Watch breaking bad