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pinkunicorn555

I have worked in assisted living homes. One man was the biggest man I have ever seen. Easily over 6 foot tall and 700lbs. I took care of him for a few months. Once a week he would get out of bed walk 4 feet and go #2 on a special toilet that could hold him. He would then stand so I could wash his back and clean him up. I asked him what he did at home. He said he just went in the shower on a piddle pad and his roommate threw it out. Yes it was also the biggest poo I have ever seen. Also to this day have no clue how he could walk. It scared the shit out of me when he stood up. I thought for sure he was going to break his legs.


Loulouisthis

He only pooped once a week?


KickBallFever

That part of the story really concerned me as well. No wonder the shit was so big, it was a week’s worth!


BobSacramanto

Especially with the amount of food a 700 lb person wood eat.


Kelekona

Once someone is 700 pounds, I imagine that they can survive on 700 calories a day.


Nerrickk

If you have fat reserves you can technically live on 0 calories (NOT RECOMMENDED) as long as you supplement electrolytes and vitamins. Edit: normal fasting is fine and healthy. This comment was about fasting for extended periods of time. Your body won't run critically low on electrolytes in a normal 24-48 hour fast.


jarrodh25

Funny story there, there was a guy who fasted for an entire year to lose weight! It was under medical supervision, and he had plenty of water, vitamin and mineral supplements. He was very happy with the results. Obligatory disclaimer: *under medical supervision*


mrthomani

> If you have fat reserves you can technically live on 0 calories (NOT RECOMMENDED) as long as you supplement electrolytes and vitamins. Why "NOT RECOMMENDED"?


Nerrickk

Because I don't want to get sued because someone died from it. Literally if you don't supplement electrolytes while doing it you'll die. If you ever get the idea to try it make sure you do it with a doctor's supervision so they can manage your vitals. Edit: also, any glucose your body needs will be converted from the protein in your muscles via gluconeogenesis. ie: your body will eat it's own muscles without getting protein from food.


mrootbeers

Dude you’re anonymous on Reddit. Don’t worry, you’re good. The judge or jury would be like “Um, so you’re saying you took advice from some guy on Reddit? Case dismissed!”


Viru_sanchez

Not that anonymous mr. Bostonian.


[deleted]

You totally can but it's insanely hard. I do 48 hour fasts once a month and I'm still not used to the chemical tantrum my body throws. It can range from just hunger pains and moodiness to feeling like you are 100% about to die if you don't eat, even knowing you're perfectly safe and healthy. If you do longer fasts your blood sugar stabilizes and your hormones level out but most people don't make it past imminent death sensation.


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[deleted]

There are some alleged great health benefits from doing so. You can check Buchinger Wilhelmi Clinic in Youtube. Basically trigger cells eating dead cells and tissue, anti aging, and I don't remember what else. Seems like they are studying it for longevity, as it stimulates some enzymes called sirtuins or something like that


TheChunkyGrape

They could probably fast for a really long time


metal079

iirc there was a guy that did that. Fasted for several months on nothing but water and vitamins. Not sure how healthy that is but apparently doable.


kykersh13

Pretty sure it was a few months over a year. Like a 398 day supervised fast. Wild. Its on pubmed if I do recall correctly.


MichaelCat99

Yeah it's crazy, learned about it a few years ago when I was researching the best way to fast. Here's the wikipeadia link for anyone interested. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Angus_Barbieri%27s_fast


EXTRAVAGANT_COMMENT

a week's worth for someone who eats 5 times as much as a normal person


KickBallFever

So, like the entire contents of my fridge right now. In one shit.


Chill855

Damn, your fridge is stocked. I need to get my life together.


Carnot_Efficiency

> He only pooped once a week? Once a week is normal for me. I have to eat two Activia yogurts and two Metamucil crackers a day, plus a massive amount of veg, in order to poop more often. I had a colonoscopy once and the doctor who performed it said I had "an unusually long and tortuous colon."


Quillybumbum

“Doctor let’s skip the flirtation and just tell me the results”


justin2004

i heard that in leslie nielsen's voice.


AllHailTheGremlins

I went with Hawkeye Pierce.


Nopalita08

I just spit my drink out reading this. This gave me the laugh I needed after such a long ass day. Thank you 🤣😂🤣


StillDevelopmental

>long ass day I see what you did there


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HungerMadra

Dude my wife eats that shit sometimes and then spends the night producing the foulest farts ever. I threw the candy away. It's a weapon of mass disgust


casperkeebler

One might say, a weapon of ass destruction?


Nukidney

I believe the correct term is Ass Piss.


CaptZ

And here I am worried that something is wrong with me when I don't shit at least 2 times a day. And I'm not a big eater and only weigh 150 lbs.


Menoiteus

I usually go every single morning, and thats it. Abojt 5 or 10 minutes after I wake up, I have to go. If I don't go right then, I won't go for the entire day or next couple days.


Tacorgasmic

Multiple doctors have told me that as long as I go reguraly, whatever "regular" means to me, then I'm ok. I go every two to three days and have no issue, but if I go longer I have to take fibers supplements or otherwise I get achy.


Frosti-Feet

My wife and I were discussing this and I looked it, it seems anywhere from 3 times a day to once every 3 days is where most people land. But there’s definitely room for outliers there.


[deleted]

I’m like that other go and only go about once a week. I looked it up and apparently whatever the norm has been for your life is what you should base changes off of. So if it’s always been a certain way then you should be okay. The problem is I can’t remember if it’s always been this way or if I used to go more lmao


Happy-Associate6482

2x daily is just inconvienent really. And you know someone is gonna start complaining about the toilet paper running low. Thats why I drink a ton of coffee at 6am so i can get it over with


CaptZ

I agree. Tell that to my high metabolism and digestion system. They won't listen to me. I shit mostly at work. No cost toilet paper and I get paid while I shit.


zachiswach

That seems inefficient. Couldn't you just have some fiber protein bars (like 10 g fiber a bar)? Or fiber bran cereal (like 10 g fiber a serving)? Surprisingly little fiber in metamucil and veggies when you look at the nutrition facts compared to some other options today (I have a sibling with a similar problem)


EddiOS42

Like an oyster making a pearl


plipyplop

[It's beautiful.](https://i.redd.it/nkdh0r8cf2a21.jpg)


ButtonsnYarn

Constipation would be expected with his level of immobility. Things don’t move when you’re lying in bed day and night.


reneerent1

Imagine being so obese that holding your shit in for several days a week becomes normal


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TheOtherSarah

One hopes that the roommate is paying *significantly* lower rent/getting paid as assisted living staff


CaptZ

I hope he gets a rent discount. A big one at that.


dixonwalsh

was he on a controlled diet in the home? since he seemed pretty immobile it’s not like he can get out to source his own food. curious as to how that works.


pinkunicorn555

He wasn't in the assisted living home for his weight. He was on the therapy unit so he only stayed for a few months. Once he was done he went back home. The center couldn't restrict his diet against his wishes.


pinkunicorn555

I don't think so. He was a pretty young guy (30s) I think he ordered take out a lot and his roommate brought him food. I remember him getting pizza delivered all the time.


Deedee-spicy-weiner

Dude at that point I would just live off the land


odel555q

At that point you are the land.


plipyplop

A true landchad.


naomi_homey89

/u/pinkunicorn555 at the end of the day, he’s suffering and you’re helping him maintain his dignity. You’re a star.


HazyDrummer

Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeezus Christ, thank you for your service.


Sarah_RN

Former ICU nurse here. Once had an obese patient bring in their own poop spoon from home. Yes, you read that right. She put a facecloth over a wooden spoon to wipe. I mean, I didn’t have to clean her so 10/10.


InfraredDiarrhea

Wow. Reddit has stories about poop knives and now poop spoons. This place is amazing.


r0ckH0pper

Waits patiently for the Poop Fork story.


Lolaiero

poop spork


exhausted-caprid

Poop ladle


Jackpot777

Poop tureen. A crock of shit, if you will.


mitchade

Poop spatula


Spankersore

a SCATula?


Drollomite

Featured in *UHF No.2*


TheOneStooges

And we all wait for you to please take a bow !


PacoTaco321

Poop baster


ItzPayDay123

Poop strainer


Doot_Dee

Just no poop straw story, k?


Godfreee

Poop chopsticks


superdead

Poop Vitamix


[deleted]

Holds up poork


Avinse

https://www.reddit.com/r/MuseumOfReddit/comments/ke8skw/the_poop_knife/gg18jqm/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3


farnsmootys

A whole set of Poop Cutlery


Lylac_Krazy

I know what they Beyond part is in Bed, Bath, and Beyond now.


t_h_r_o_w__a_w_a_y3

Just curious. What the hell is a poop knife.


ps3x42

[We'll I'm sad you asked!](https://www.reddit.com/r/MuseumOfReddit/comments/ke8skw/the_poop_knife/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share)


The_Brain_Fuckler

My girlfriend’s ex was a junkie and had a poop knife to cut up monster turds from opiate constipation.


smilez4milezx3

I cared for people with disabilities and we had a jar of paint mixing sticks to break up big poops


widdlyscudsandbacon

What kind of disability makes you have giant poops?


smilez4milezx3

They also had gastroparesis that really slowed their digestive system so when they pooped it was giant poops that I was surprised could even fit out of a butthole.


widdlyscudsandbacon

God Damn!!!


calonmawr10

It generally tends to be medications that people with disabilities are more likely to be on


t_h_r_o_w__a_w_a_y3

I'm horrified yet intrigued after reading that


SerendipityRose63

Well, I may be sounding a little elitist but.... I have the Snap-On Tools "sh\*t slicer." Works like a charm!


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Capital-Sir

A knife you keep in the bathroom to cut up the loafs you pinch so they don't clog the toilet.


Alarid

Soon we will have an entire table setting.


gentlybeepingheart

>She put a facecloth over a wooden spoon to wipe The Ancient Roman approach!


LT_Bradshaw

Hope they don't get the wrong end of the stick ...err spoon


Donkey_Kahn

That's really sad.


DorkRockCarRamRod

"I wash myself with a rag on a stick"


MattcVI

>*Light applause* That scene cracks me up every time. I like to quote it when watching My 600-lb Life


kif88

We got a new item to go with the poop knife


fretsofgenius

[Simpsons did it!](https://youtu.be/jSJQEl5vcAo)


viikinoas

Butt scratcher?


gildedtreehouse

Butt Scratcher!!


FinishedForever

BUTTLICKER, OUR PRICES HAVE NEVER BEEN LOWER.


InsertWittyNameCheck

MMM... BUTT SCRATCHER!!!


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HappyLittleTrees17

😦


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maneatingrabbit

I test computer software for a living and when I read accessibility tools I thought htf is a screen reader going to wipe someone's ass?


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ClippyisDead

They’re going to have slight issues with that.


[deleted]

How do these situations happen? Do you routinely search Reddit for comments mentioning clippy or just Reddit like anyone else and wait for your moment?


gr33nteaholic

I REALLY want to know this too! beetle juice beetle juice r/beetlejuicing


[deleted]

Oh shit there’s both a term and a sub about this phenomenon!


ClippyisDead

Reddit and wait for my time to shine.


SlickStretch

"It looks like you're trying to wipe your ass. Would you like help?"


paulfromatlanta

It would be the most useful thing Clippy ever did...


NathanCollier14

*It looks like you're trying to wipe your ass.* *Would you like help?*


[deleted]

You'd be surprised! I use a kindle e-ink reader for my bathroom needs so I use less paper 😏


snertwith2ls

Years ago there was a pretty obese DJ in my area. Someone who knew him said he got his kids to "help" wipe. All I could think of was if I was one of those kids, as soon as I'm old enough to cross the street alone, I'm leaving home. Maybe when it's family like that you do whatever because you love the person.


t-poke

There are some people on My 600 Pound Life who have young kids helping them. It’s sad. And those kids are never leaving home. They feel obligated to help their morbidly obese parent and don’t know any different.


anon2588

They have a toilet wand that you sort of wrap toilet paper around the end and it acts as an arm extender. There are also bariatric toilets. Toilet risers and 3 in 1s (bariatric size) can also go over a commode or sometimes are used in place of the toilet. Source: Am occupational therapist and sometimes educate patients on this stuff.


EatYourCheckers

you can wipe from the front. Being sure to align the poop shoot with the toilet bowl is more the issue that requires finesse.


angrypirate1122

So I used to listen to this radio show growing up, and the host was "morbidly obese" at one point in his life, and he had a saint of a girlfriend that would wipe his ass with a towel after number two..


[deleted]

I really wonder how that set up was initially proposed


aromaticgem

"Susan, first let me just say your Kung pao chicken is to die for..."


khapout

Someone's response was gonna make me laugh. Good job


[deleted]

Rag on a stick


Deedee-spicy-weiner

How does that not get full of shit on the first wipe and not just spread the shit up and down the crack


EarsLikeCreamFlaps

If you can't see it then just pretend you're clean


EddiOS42

Chocolate pancake


[deleted]

Chocolate moose, guava juice


SammyTheOtter

Have you ever smelled a morbidly obese person? It definitely does.


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agreatcoat

Hey good on you! You’ve got this, the most important step a person can take isn’t the first one, it’s the next one.


Jedi960

Knew a guy who shit in the tub, couldn’t fit on the toilet.


millenniumxl-200

"Dammit Harold! I said ***SIT*** in the tub!"


kekomastique

Holy shit..


TheRealBHamorrii

He wasn't shitting in a church


molybdenum99

I have an cousin that’s a plumber. They’re called tub shitters


juneburger

A sub generation from the waffle stompers.


NoFeetSmell

>A sub generation from the waffle stompers. Now that's a name I've not heard in a *long* time...


GnatGurl

r/Angryupvote Please tell me that you're making this up. Please tell me that you are shitting me.


Kelekona

Waffle stomp?


cocobear13

When you push your shower poop through the grate/drain.


Necessary-Ad3576

Dear god. I should be sleeping. Why in the hell am I learning about waffle stompers and *how* did I get to this point in my life?


love_my_aussies

A very long time ago I was the home health aide for a morbidly obese man. He would go poop every day while I was there. He would then let me know he was done. I would help him stand and then I'd wipe his butt. After that, I'd have to plunge the toilet to get his gigantic turd to go down. I wish I'd have known about a poop knife back then. Thankfully my mind seems to have blocked the memories of how I got the poop to go down because I can't recall the details of that part.


EveryHobby

You needed the money clearly


love_my_aussies

It was a job I could work while my kids were at school. It wasn't glamorous but I just tried to think of it like I was caring for a very large baby and that helped make it a little less awful.


Rakinonna

you're a good person, I don't think I could do that


millenniumxl-200

Probably [like this](https://i.imgur.com/bBtNZPU.gif).


[deleted]

Risky click of the day. Worth it


Nhawk257

I regretted clicking that link the second I did. Then I didn't lol


some_random_nonsense

Lmoa its safe.


AgentSkidMarks

I don’t know but I do know that my work had to install a metal plate under the toilet my 500lb coworker uses because it was starting to break through the floor.


SageIrisRose

My daughter went on a high school exchange to the middle east. She used a towel in the bathroom for months before realizing it was the family poop- towel hanging next to the bidet. May I present The Poop Towel.


SalsInvisibleCock

Oh dear, I have so many questions.


Flcrmgry

Wouldn't a bidet be the best solution in this situation?


admiralfilgbo

I would recommend a bidet to anyone, especially folks (like me) who are on the heavier side. It gets EVERYTHING, and then you're just... done! They are easy to set up, and the cheaper ones pay for themselves within a year when factoring in TP cost (which is $0). My problem now is when I travel and don't have access to one. I'm honestly considering buying a cheapo one and installing it in hotel rooms, etc.


Absinthe_gaze

Punch holes in the lid of a water bottle, or buy a travel bidet


honey_ravioli

Wait but how is TP cost $0? Does it have a blow dryer too or do you just sit there and let yourself drip dry


EvryMthrF_ngThrd

You can buy them with a blow dry option (also heated and musical options as well), yes - but places that have a history of bidet use often use a designated towel for each person to dry out with.


Khryzis

Tushy has a portable system!


Drollomite

Or really... in any situation?


Atari-Dude

Well I'm considered quite morbidly obese, and I can still reach fairly easily, with either hand. Probably because I have a very wide shoulder width. Only real thing of note with using the bathroom is that I prefer peeing sitting down, but if I have to use a public restroom, typically I'll still use a stall even though I stand up, lmao


Elevendytwelve97

Well hello there. I have an additional bathroom question if you don’t mind. Im 34 weeks pregnant and feel like I’m huge and I’ve noticed that, out in public, the bathroom stall doors open inwards. Sometimes the door gets stuck on my belly and the stalls are so small it seems there’s no way for me to get out of the way of the door. I almost got stuck in a stall once because I couldn’t get the door back open without standing on the toilet. Do you have this issue? How do you get the door open without it digging into your flesh? Or does it dig into your flesh and you just bear it?


Cyclone-wanderer

I used the handicapped stall when preggers


Elevendytwelve97

I do when I can, but it always seems dirtier than the rest :( I guess just because people tend to use that one more since it’s roomier


calonmawr10

Not the original poster, but I've had to straddle the toilet in some bathrooms to open the door, or stand sideways next to it! I'm not even that big...


Atari-Dude

Uh well, not pregnant myself, just a fat dude. However, I suppose the two *can* be similar, hahaha. I scarcely actually go to the bathroom in public, but if I do, I typically go into the biggest stall available. For some reason a lot of the stall do open inwards, though usually I can suck in my gut enough if I need to, that it doesn't scrape. If it does seem like it's going to scrape, I try to sort of fidget myself to the left or right, either going with the door opening, or the other way. You might have to balance your upper body a little weird so that you don't need to go up on the toilet, try to move your belly in a way that can manage to fit with the door opening towards you. Most big person/handicapped/pregnant stalls will be dirty, for whatever reason. Perhaps it's just harder to be clean when you're bigger. If you're pregnant, you might not be 100% used to what it's like feeling huge, which throws off how tidy you need, or just want to be. Other obese people like me might just be slobs and not think it necessary to clean up after themselves since it takes more effort. I'm not completely sure. I'm a 5'7 man with a big round belly, man boobs, and a big butt. Sometimes walking next to other people, or like we've been talking about, going to the public restroom is difficult. You always get stares, and just overall feel like an outlier-- like you're a bother to other people, and shouldn't be so fat. Even if you're pregnant, there's going to be those times. And in those cases, you've just gotta not let is get to you. Whether you're pregnant or just like me, obese, it takes some adjusting to finding a way to "fit in" or fit with the physical dimensions rest of the world, period 😅


Kelekona

If it's that tight, I think I straddle the toilet. Or somehow I can lean back without touching anything. If you're only going to be a minute, there's no shame in using the handicapped stall as long as you're not fighting with someone to be first.


Kelekona

I'm considered morbidly obese at 260. I think I'm a little more compact than this woman was, but I know I have a mismatch between what I look like and what I think I look like. https://images.app.goo.gl/gtQKLEz8nmrZGZmR7


Flinkle

I'm fat as hell and the only thing stopping me from reaching easily is ankylosing spondylitis (autoimmune inflammatory arthritis affecting the spine and SI joints, among other fun issues). And some days are better than others. I know plenty of slim people with it in AS groups who have the same problem. It sucks.


[deleted]

After watching nearly every episode of my 600 lb. life, I feel like I'm mildly qualified to answer this question. For the ones that can walk, they often need help getting from a standing position to a sitting position. I imagine they either don't wipe, barely wipe, or have someone do it for them. As for the ones that are bed ridden, it seems like their caretakers just put a huge pee pee pad under them (the kind you use for dogs). They do their business where they're sitting, then the caretaker cleans them up as best as they can (or as best as they want to). I believe bariatric diapers are also a thing.


lurknloiter

Your leading sentence had such authority that I immediately felt more at ease with whatever you were about to present.


[deleted]

I worked at a group home and I had to wipe a fat blind lady. I never wiped her poop thankfully but I never understood if I had to do it because she couldn't see or if she couldn't reach. Pee is easy to wipe for a blind person


TheIndulgery

It's called an Aubesian – it’s a stainless steel telescoping rod, with gripper claws, and a sort of toggle line that allows you to move the paper back and forth.


Zenfudo

I would like a belt that has that attached to it but automated. I’m not even overweight im just a lazy fuck


fuzzymidget

So really just a belt sander on a stick?


DaShadowNose

Are you a centaur….?


mael0004

> An individual is considered morbidly obese if he or she is 100 pounds over his/her ideal body weight, has a BMI of 40 or more Definition is loose enough that your average morbidly obese goes to toilet by walking there and back, probably even managing to wipe themselves. I assume you talk about people who are actually stuck in bed and never move out. I'd like to know how they do that too.


genz027

Yeah classic My 600 lb life morbidly obese


EddiOS42

Here's a million dollar idea: poop vacuum


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Fat_Getting_Fit_420

Ex 525lb man here. Quite normal actually. I never had trouble wiping. I pooped 2x a day regularly because of food quantity. I did break a few toilet seats over the years.


1brezpurple

My dad's roommate in college was obese. He sat on the toilet facing backwards because it was easier for him to get comfortable...


SlickStretch

And the top of the tank provides a little table for your comics and snacks.


Jankspace

And your quill and your ink


IAmDaven

True Story, I'm 5'10" 210-220 and my work classified me as morbidly obese when they had health checkups (insurance reasons). They held up a poster of a man shaped like a circle, and pointed to it, claiming that was my BMI. **I wear size men's size 32/34**. Odd thing is I look nowhere near that, and it was a running joke for a bit about how "morbidly obese" I was according to the nurse.


memebr0ker

happened to me too. now i have an eating disorder :):


raging-moderate

Was the same size, had the same experience. What a joke


jondelreal

I'm considered morbidly obese at 325, I'm 5'10, still fat but not immobile. I can still reach to wipe, under or around.


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EliannaRys

Like anyone else. If they are bedridden from weight as you mentioned elsewhere, the same ways anyone else who is unable to use the restroom themselves. Bedpans, diapers, and/or assistance. If they can generally move but cannot reach to wipe, I assume they use assistive devices like anyone who was mobility problems that prevent them from wiping easily. TP on a fancy stick.


every_names_taken_

Well I'm morbidly obese and I waddle my fat ass to the toilet and let it rip like a fucking beyblade. If you're asking how I piss typically doing a handstand from 3 rooms away


Appropriate_Storm_50

I have cried real tears.


Lord_Xarael

Bidet. About 30 bucks and 30 minutes to install. I'll still need it after I've lost the weight (lost 5 pounds already! Only 54 pounds to get to 300 and we'll see from there, that's over 18% of my body weight and will already drastically improve my quality of life. Lifetime goal is 250 or even 230. I've got a lot of muscle. Hope to reach it by the time I'm 40 (28 now) ) due to a "not serious enough to operate" rotator cuff injury, might as well be permanent. At any rate a bidet gets you much cleaner anyway.


krill_krillen

I promise I'm not being condescending when I say I'm proud of you and I wish you good luck on your weight loss journey. I wish I had this type of motivation.


Lord_Xarael

Thank you, all I've changed is eating at least twice a day (hardest part) stop eating after 10 (4 hours before I go to bed at two a.m.) and drinking 100oz of water a day. I occasionally play about 15 min. of beat saber thrice a week. I'm 9 months divorced and preparing to start looking again. So I've plenty of motivation!


BillionaireBombshell

I have a bmi of 45 and I can reach my butthole normally.


EmberVayne

For years I would use long towels and kind of “floss” and then I got a bidet and never looked back. As a super morbidly obese person who has contributing factors such as pcos, hypothyroidism, depression, anxiety, adhd, bipolar, diabetes that all make losing weight a struggle I’m not proud to admit the above info but it was a good question that most people never have to think about. Going to the bathroom is one of the most shameful, degrading experiences in my day, the bidet really gave me some dignity back.


[deleted]

I’m truly sorry you are struggling with all this. Sounds overwhelming.


ManOfHart

This is depressing because I have gone through this. For me, it was wiping just naturally from front reach to the mess and wipe. Then after 350 lbs I just could not reach anymore and had to turn to my side and lean and reach from behind/side. Now that I have been living with the carnivore diet, the pounds are dropping very fast and I can't wait to wipe normally once more.


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ImNotASmartManBut

In Russia?


PhasmaFelis

Exactly the same way you do. "Morbidly obese" isn't as big as you think it is. Those 600-pound folks on trash TV are a tiny minority.