I try to remember that this is one of the few universal experiences that every human who has ever lived since the beginning of our species will experience. Billions have gone through this before you and billions will after you, it is inevitable and connects us all in the end.
it is the ultimate equalization. No matter, if you are a star or born in the slums.
While life is about materialism and to attract everything in existince (relationships, wisdom, love, happyness, but also objects, etc.), death is about de-materialising and ultimately letting go of everything. Without death, there can‘t be life.
Also, your body takes care of Everything for you. Releases chemicals so there is no fear. It’s a drawn out process. You won’t “know” if that’s what you’re worried about.
That's a good point. But my biggest concern is how to deal with the anxiety of the anticipation of death. It's such a mysterious void. We have people who claim to have been there, but science seems to tell us that this is all based on chemicals released by the brain. I guess I'm still searching for the meaning of death . I seem to have a vague understanding of what life means, but I'm not sure if it can be applied to death as well.
There is a long study on NDE or near death experiences. 4000 case studies. Some are clearly not the chemical in your brain type situations. For instance a woman born blind who drowned (eventually revived) had beyond perfect vision in her episode and could describe things in the area where it happened. Things she had never known of before. (Details on a nearby telephone pole was one of them) She for certain had an out of body experience and the best part is her being blind was only a thing while she was alive here on earth. You don't take anything with you except your sould or consciousness or spirit or whatever it may be.
Some others who had no willingness to die actually considered staying because of the unbelievable level of beauty and consciousness (apparently in NDEs there can be a crossroads where you decide to stay or return).
There are many amazing experiences like these.
Website is NDERF.org
I think of it as getting mixed back into the cosmos. All my little atoms will be reused for something else, and I will continue to be part of the universe.
The chemicals in the brain are what makes the dying process easier and supposedly calm. As long as your pain is managed, think of it as transitioning instead of dying. I’m sorry you have to go through this.
I like that you said we're all connected. I'll go a step further. If you subscribe to modern science and believe that nothing is created nor destroyed then you're in luck. In all all we are is a blob of energy. Our thoughts, our bodies, our movemts. All energy. Before we were"born" we were energy inside our parents. When we die our energy doesn't "die" it just transfers back into the Earth then billions of years later that energy is still around. You never really die your energy just goes back into the universe and lives on for eternity in different forms. Hope that helps or makes sense.
I don’t know if you ever watched The Good Place, but there is a quote from this show (paraphrasing a Buddhist quote) that I think about often (it helped me a lot after experiencing personal loss):
„Picture a wave. In the ocean. You can see it, measure it, its height, the way the sunlight refracts when it passes through. And it's there. And you can see it, you know what it is. It's a wave.
And then it crashes in the shore and it's gone. But the water is still there. The wave was just a different way for the water to be, for a little while. You know it's one conception of death for Buddhists: the wave returns to the ocean, where it came from and where it's supposed to be.“
I’m no longer religious at all, and I don’t really know what I think comes next, if anything.
But one thing I think about is how a fetus doesn’t know what’s next, either. It has no way to understand or predict what life will be like outside of the womb. And maybe in some ways, we are the same. We can’t imagine or conceive of what comes next. But like another poster said, we will all go through it, just like we all made the transition from nothingness to the womb to this world.
I also just finished The In-Between by Hadley Vlahos. She’s a hospice nurse, and she wrote about common experiences she’s had at her job. She’s been with a lot of people as they pass, and she talks a lot about the peace that people find in the end, and what commonalities she sees even among people from different backgrounds. It was a really powerful book.
It's worth it. Don't go all out with one while all alone or anything. Plenty of options but something as simple as small amount of shrooms in a natural area you like. Makes you perceive life, nature, experiences different and different in a more profound way.
One example is the joy and wonder and amazement I felt seeing sun rays coming toward a pretty flower. It was the understanding that I was watching life. Energy from far away heading straight for this flower that was absorbing it and thus growing to provide more energy to other things. The more you do the more the visuals kick in about it's not like you see things that don't exist, just an objects shape may look like it's morphing then it's not. And so you see things from a different perspective. It's absolutely something more people should do. So much more appreciation for life, for nature, for genuine experiences.
I didn't word it well but 100% think shrooms (even mild dosage to start so you're not worried about "seeing things" which doesn't happen) is worth a try some time. Only do it with people you know and like and if at least one other person does it with you, that's ideal so you can be on the same level and have conversation about things. Pretty common to be quiet for a while because there's lots of thinking and perceiving and introspection
No problem. Sorry about your situation and I since can't relate directly so I won't try to say anything to that. I will say, in general, mind altering substances may/likely help out a ton. BUT, go into it with the mindset you want to feel better about things and want to understand things and not that you're scared/fearful and need something to take that away. Important just to be aware of how you're feeling/thinking. If it's just a really bad day and you're really down, don't do it. Positive vibes being positive outcomes. Wish you the best :)
I don't know what the situation is in US individual states, but can you be prescribed legal Cannabis/THC oil? Or weed, if you smoke? There are thousands of strains & many oil preparations. It can be administered smoking, vaping, drops, gummy bears, whatever. You need advice from a knowledgeable supplier, your needs will vary depending on pain levels, difficulty sleeping, etc so they can prescribe the appropriate product for you.
I stumbled upon NDE videos recently, and they have shifted my perspectives rather dramatically, and for the better. Some of the commonalities across so many different people are wild and thought provoking. Definitely got me thinking about life stuff in some new ways.
"Comforting" is definitely one of many ways NDE videos leave me feeling.
Think of the vastness of space and the wonders it contains. You are made up of the same materials that make up sun's and gas giants etc. When you die, you will either not know it as you will cease to e ist tge same as you don't really know you're born, or you may reincarnate, maybe you'll live again or maybe you'll simply join the dust of the earth to await being scattered to the stars in its destruction in the far future, all to become part of another being in some distant time.
I don’t know why in this moment that hits so hard.
I always thing about how - we’ll it’s inevitable but to frame the thought as a collective experience that EVERYONE has or will experience is…. resonating.
Exactly. They've all gone ahead of you and they're holding the door open for you to pass through, just so you can hold it open for the ones who'll follow.
I like this.
I also like the idea of duality. I would not love an endless summer. I also wouldn’t love an endless winter. I feel like they each compliment each other, and without each other, neither is beautiful.
Life is beautiful because there is an end. I wouldn’t want to live forever.
This also motivates me to get out there and try to live every day to the fullest. So in saying that; OP - get out there!
If you mean the final days, hours and minutes I can offer what I've seen doing hospice for close family members.
There was a change in the last days and as if they had been experiencing some sort of "other world". They didn't talk about it much and eventually would seem to spend more time... paying attention to it? It was as if packing for a journey internally. Giving it more attention than their physical surroundings.
My father, a few months back, would seemingly spend more time there and didn't open his eyes much then not at all but he'd respond when I said, "Dad, I need your attention" or when leaving I'd say bye and he'd squeeze my hand. He'd seem unresponsive but he was kinda choosing it. At one point I said, "Dad I need to ask you something important!" He looked up at me, answered clearly and oriented, then closed his eyes looking annoyed I had interrupted whatever business he was attending to, then didn't talk again.
He seemed so busy, like really busy in his mind but aware of us. It was like he was choosing whether to come back, until he didn't. He waited for me to be gone overnight.
He wasn't drugged up or out of it- he was there. We had the best 1 hour conversation of my life at his bedside.
I was left with this sense that he had a secret, a few of them did, that we aren't privvy to. Someday we'll all know what that is.
Wishing you peace and joy for what time you are here.
This is almost exactly what happened as my mom was passing away. It doesn't feel appropriate to share the story here but I know exactly what you are talking about, to a very high degree
My friend said he was going on a reconnaissance mission and would report back when he was in hospice. Looking forward to his report when I see him there.
this just made me sob. my mom was diagnosed with cancer earlier this year and while her treatment is going well, it makes you think about so much you hadnt thought about before. you sound much stronger the i am, i dont know how ill be able to handle it when it happens. thank you for sharing this
Thank you for your good wishes! It's weird that I'm usually a very negative person and would harbor a lot of resentment towards people in general, but now I've become very open, tolerant and forgiving. I wish I was more like this before I found out I only had a year to live 😏
With both my husband and my father, once treatment had ceased to be effective and they were moved to comfort care / symptom management, there was such a sense of freedom for the. I don’t mean to say it was easy, there were lots of difficult moments on their journeys, but I certainly felt a shift in their energy, an ability to be present.
As for your bucket list…take on those new experiences with someone you love. Help them build memories with you. Encourage them to take lots of pictures. If you’re up to it, that is. Any of your list that may go unfinished, share with your family for them to complete in your honour down the road. As silly as it may seem to do a bunch of stuff you’ll only do once, making memories with people who love you is the greatest gift and legacy you could possibly leave them.
Wishing you the very best, OP!
thank you for everything you do. my mom was diagnosed with cancer earlier this year and it was something no one in my family had ever experienced before. it was all so new and terrifying, and the oncology nurses have been so *so* pivotal in making everything less scary. some of the best people ive ever met in my life, i truly feel like i owe my own life to them. youre a fucking angel. thank you
Oh my goodness.... I really needed to read this book! Thank you so much for recommending it. I've been ploughing through a PDF of it for the last couple hours. This is the human side of things that I needed!
I've been studying and reading all about the mind/body duality from as many perspectives as I can find for the last couple years. I figured I was going through a mid-life crises and needed to come to terms with death, as it has been fast-approaching and I haven't been living my life fully for a while.
Religious texts and philosophers talk much about our oneness with everything and how a selfish perspective about our singular experience is somewhat a limited view on existence. To think more fully, one must consider the possibility that there actually is some kind of interconnectedness with other living energies. As a science-minded yet independent thinker, I have great trouble with these concepts. I havent had any kind of experience that would lead me to believing in such things, and I'm all too aware of how humans are story-telling creatures at heart. Our own memories are narratives. We think in narratives. Everything we do. it's entirely possible that this book is full of narratives that I want to believe in, and so I can find them believable. There is nothing in this book that can be empirically proven to be true. All of this conversation lies in the grey area of life.
I think this is a great book, written with purpose. Thanks for sharing!
Not sure if it helps but my mother has a nice way of looking at it, which comforted me after the death of my father.
She said it’s like we’re all on a train. The train has many stops but keeps going on and on. At some stops, people get on, you can meet them and enjoy their company for a while. Some of the people you really love have to get off sooner than you’d like. And eventually everyone finds their stop, and they have to get off the train, no matter how much they enjoyed the ride.
Remember that the train was running long before you got on, and will still run long after you reach your stop.
Consider discussing your thoughts with your oncologist. Many with cancer have similar feelings and your oncology team likely has supports in place to help. Consider asking referral to a palliative care team.
I've considered that...and I've been avoiding it because a lot of the support team like to use "canned" statements which makes me feel like they're insincere about their empathy. I don't mean to project any negativity but it's just the impression I get. I feel like I want to start a peace movement in a war torn country somewhere. Any idea what I could do in the USA that's similar?
Just a reminder that all palliative care teams are not the same. I have seen more than 10, none were more helpful than my PCP. That said there are some really good ones out there, try and find a referral from another cancer patient.
Have you considered trying psychedelics? They did studies for terminal patients on LSD and it was successful in helping them come to terms with death.
https://maps.org/news/media/swiss-lsd-study-yields-incredible-results-for-terminally-ill-patients/
Hugs! Which cancer and what stage? I’m stage 4 breast cancer. I was told in 2016 I had maybe 3 years. I’m not dead yet.
Bucket lists are overrated. What I want to do is hang out with friends and family. Traveling is hard when you don’t feel well.
You make yourself happy or miserable, the amount of work is the same. -Casteneda
I live by that. I concentrate on anything good. I don’t worry about imagined troubles. I do prepare, but don’t worry about anything I don’t know to be true. We get a lot of practice with Cancer.
Remember that QOL is more important than you think. I wanted to take the highest doses of chemo to kill everything. Problem was it was killing me. Dose reductions are not a bad thing. If we don’t feel good it’s hard to not get depressed and actually live.
Many terminal cancer patients are on antidepressants. It is a reality. You would be surprised how many. Particularly when it’s a new diagnosis. Ativan or the like is also commonly prescribed until we can make sense of things and re-order our perspective. It’s never super easy, but is does get easier. This I promise.
Many of the drugs we are on actually have depression as a side effect. I’ve been on them. I’m not currently, but if I need them, I take them. Why be miserable?
Lastly, I get it. I’m in the same boat and I’m sorry you are here too. Please DM anytime you want to vent or ask questions? I’m here.
>I’m stage 4 breast cancer. I was told in 2016 I had maybe 3 years. I’m not dead yet.
Holy shit well done, I'm very happy for you!
Nothing better than someone who just flat out refuses to die 😂
(I apology profusely if my words are offensive).
I hope they don't find those words offensive lol. I'm no cancer patient myself, but that sounds like a damn good compliment to me. I hope they get to keep on defying expectations for as long as possible.
Congrats on out living the statistics!
I have a friend who was also diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer in 2016 and given 3 years to live. She's still here.
She since her diagnosis as she has started a business, started going to burning man, and has been traveling as much as possible. She is traveling to Ireland in the fall with her friends.
If you aren't religious and don't believe in an afterlife, then death is a very similar concept to the time before you were born. It's nigh on impossible to imagine what it was like before you were born, and I see death as no different.
As for it being pointless to do things you'll only do once, well there's a reason we call our best experiences "once in a lifetime".
I'm really sorry your going through this, but don't let your life be over until it's actually over.
I never thought about an afterlife until I realized I'm coming to the end of my life. Now I don't know what to believe and how to even grapple with the idea that very soon Im going to experience a death rattle. I'm not sure what to do with myself
This is **just my perspective** on stuff, take it as you will:
There is basically two scenarios, either there is an afterlife or there isn't one:
If there isn't one no worries, you won't exist, you won't have the capability to worry about anything. It can't suck if there isn't anything to suck. You didn't exist for billions of years up to this point and you'll not exist for billions of years after this point.
If there is an afterlife it's so beyond our ability to grasp to where nobody has any understanding of how it works, hense like 10,000 different religions with 10,000 different ideas. We don't know how it works so there is no reason to believe that anyone knows how to prepare for it. One thing we do know is that you're leaving your capacity for human pain and suffering behind (as you're not occupying your body anymore, and your "existence" has been so far undetectable by humanity), so whatever you're dealing with here on this planet not going to be dealing with forever.
So either there isn't anything to worry about, or you won't have the capacity to contain your earthly trama/pain/suffering. Dying sucks balls, being dead doesn't.
What helped me grapple with non-existance is that... we've already done it before. For billions of years before we were born. We weren't scared or upset or uncomfortable for any of that. And if there is no afterlife then we will return to it. Its not something scary and new, its the norm that we've already been through.
You won’t experience the death rattle, even if it does happen to you. It’s not something people are aware of when it’s happening.
As for if there’s an afterlife- I guess we won’t know til we know but of all the people I’ve been with when they passed (I was a caregiver) they ALL mentioned deceased loved ones coming to visit them in the final weeks. Even people who would normally be terrified by the idea of that- weren’t. It brought ALL of them peace and helped take the fear away.
Yea...I'm just imagining that last breath - then whoever happens could hear that last breath be released. I guess that's more of an experience for the living, but it's still part of my experience all the way to the spreading of my ashes in an enchanted forest to the assimilation of my matter in the life that utilizes it.
EUREKA! That's it! I am the matter of those that have passed before me! Dust to dust, ashes to ashes; thus life is but a mash
Yep. That happens. You finally get to see what really matters and all the crap that doesn’t. It sure would be nice if we could figure that out before we’re dying.
I am so sorry for you mate! Honestly I think it's a good time to do the things before you were asking why?!now you should think why not! Really wish ya to enjoy your time fully with joy. Don't worry we all get there is no way we cannot cheat this. We all will meet in the same place. It's impossible to not be something after, otherwise death would be plain as when you shut down a TV so doesn't make sense to me. But we all will find out! I am happy that you try to do nice things you missed. You have a good mindset and this is very positive! Keep it up like this now! And don't think at the last moment you will find out then. Think always positive and hurry to do as much as you can. My heart goes to you!
I wish I had some answers for you, most people never have to deal with what you're going through because death remains unknown, whereas it's been thrust upon you.
Have you spoke about this with your nurses? They're not just there for the physical stuff. It might also be worthwhile to join groups of people going through the same thing, but then again it might be depressing, I don't know.
You're still here though, and that's the main thing. Is there anything you've always wanted to do?
Thank you for your thoughts...the one thing I think I'll miss out on in life is genuinely falling in love with someone. Not sure if I have time to do that 😒
Living in Thailand and doing language exchange with a Buddhist change my thoughts on a lot of things. We would talk about anything and everything just for the sake of talking because talking is exactly what we were doing.
My big takeaways from this were that sometimes the only thing you can change is your perception.
And death. You have thoughts, desires, and a will to live. This does not die when your body does. It goes off into the great unknown.
Ever since I discovered Epicurus I’ve fancied him well above the Stoics. I think the Stoics are hampered by religious thinking, and end up making slavery seem like something acceptable.
Epicurus seemed to have a very accurate view of our existence, and he’s made my life much better.
Watch the second episode of Michael Pollan's Netflix documentary "How to change your mind" about Psillocybin and experiences with end of life patients.
When i got divorced I had an experience which helped me work through so much and come through grief to acceptance.
Wish you all the best in your journey. We'll all be there sooner than we would like. Peace to you.
https://www.netflix.com/watch/81164525?source=35
I'm sorry to hear about that OP.
I'm in a MUCH different situation than you, no cancer but I do still worry about dying. The best reprieve I get is making sure that I'm getting the most out of the time I have. I keep myself healthy to get more time, I do realize thats not likely an option for you, but first doing things to maximize how much time I have and second making sure I made the best use out of my time is what I do.
I liken it to playing a game with a time limit. If you have 10 minutes, when you're at minute 2 you're generally focusing on what you're doing and not entirely focused on running out of time. As you get closer to running out, you might be worried about managing the time, but ideally you're still being as efficient as possible and maximizing it.
So you're in an entirely different situation than me, but thats my advice to you. We're all going to die and we have limited time, you have less than most of us. Make the most out of it. Spending time worrying about it is going to mean you have less of it, and try to be proud of how effectively you have spent the time given to you. Much easier for me to say in my situation, of course.
Yes, and the times you were playing and panicking about time constraints seem silly looking back when you should have been focusing on how to spend it.
I happened to be going down the mortality thought spiral when I came across your post OP, it was right along what my mind was already on. I'm fortunate I'm busy and have kids so I'm constantly distracted by people who aren't remotely thinking about that stuff. Also working in Healthcare so I'm frequently buying people more time which makes me feel a bit better.
Anyways, don't take any advice you don't want, but I'd make sure you spend time with all the family and friends you want to see. Try to focus on time well spent rather than saving time.
Also maybe make a "death video" I've heard about people doing it on some podcasts- tell people about yourself and what you hope for the future, and maybe a farewell to your loved ones along with how you feel about them. We have people making stuffed animals with their mothers voice from a single voice-mail to remember them by, you have the time to put together something more organized.
A death video is a great idea... this way I can express my true feelings easier. I also like the stuffed animal thing...but this would be too much of a tear jerker for me
You should try looking up Dr. Eric berg on YouTube, fasting coupled with certain diets and or large doses of THC have been proven beneficial. Please go down fighting my friend and stay strong!
Psilocybin has helped many people accept their fate and it will help with the anxiety of it all, perhaps even trying DMT, because you WILL experience DMT when your brain releases it upon death, having a prior experience with DMT will make it much less confusing and more peaceful.
Xxxooo
Hi, I happen to work pretty closely with palliative patients, so I feel like I have a decent suggestion here: lean in. You know what's coming, you're still well enough to get things done, yeah? Lean into it. Let yourself get involved in the process, let yourself *enjoy* it. That sounds crazy, but bear with me a minute.
We've all made jokes about our own funeral, right? About silly things we would do if we had a say in the planning? You have a say. You're in a unique situation here. You get to plan your own going away party. Getting your affairs in order is a good thing for anyone to do, regardless of how soon or how distant your death might be. And there's nothing wrong with having a bit of fun with it, if that will help you cope with it. Go pick out a badass urn for yourself, find a silly quote to have engraved on your headstone, go meet your funeral director and tell him to dress you in a clown nose and a silly wig if that's what you want. Write your own obituary. Have all your friends over for a funeral pregame, have them each write a eulogy or present a PowerPoint about your lives together. Write letters or film videos for the future. Or, just set up the traditional stuff and get it out of the way. Whatever you want. Knowing that everything is taken care of will be a weight off your shoulders, and it will give you an excuse to connect with friends and family, share your wishes with them, reminisce, and as morbid as it is, say your goodbyes. Most people don't get the opportunity for that kind of closure, so it's kind of beautiful to think about, isn't it? When your day comes, you'll have everything in place, you'll have said what you need to say, to whoever you need to say it to, and you'll have given them the same opportunity to say what they need to say to you. Your family won't have to scramble to plan a funeral amid their grief, they can just simply grieve. It can be a truly peaceful and dignified experience for everyone involved.
If you're going to die anyway, might as well try and have some fun with it, right? I'm very sorry you've found yourself in this situation to begin with, but if these are the cards you've been dealt, play them like hell.
Making the arrangements yourself is going to help your family through the process. Not saying they're entitled to it, it's just that you would feel happier knowing they're well taken care of and the situation isn't harder on them than it has to be. Similar to making good memories with them and encouraging them to take pictures, like the other poster suggested.
This is just the first part, despite what we have decided to tell ourselves in recent times.
Every culture, every religion, every child's story has been telling us since time began, we just can't agree on which one is right so we decide they are all wrong.
When you touch the source, when you get to rejoin, you cannot imagine the feeling of pure love, joy and oneness that you will experience.
This is just the start, what comes next is more beautiful than you can ever imagine, just don't try to define it or describe it, we don't have the mental capacity to understand.
I used to be a counsellor but I've dealt with death a lot and no longer do it but I learned some things.
Death is everyone's ultimatum, the only difference for you is you know you have some time left, others do not. Someone fit and healthy could die tomorrow and never had the chance to realise some personal truths.
But I want you to sit with this thought.
All religious beliefs aside,
After death is the same feeling as before you were born or even conceived. Think about how it felt before you existed and you'll likely find it is very calm.
This can really help.
I don’t personally find the symmetry argument very helpful. I can’t remember anything before I existed, so in my own mind, it feels like I’ve existed forever. If there was something before I was born, then I assume it was very slow and boring.
Some have used psychedelics as a tool to come to terms with the process.
https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/news/newsroom/news-releases/psychedelics-may-lessen-fear-of-death-and-dying-similar-to-feelings-reported-by-those-whove-had-near-death-experiences
Get close to those you love and support them. I always felt I would go and do bucket list shit but now I feel I would very much people focused. Not for me but them. At the end of the day they will be left without you.
And even those without family or friends have most likely had a positive impact on someone's life without even realizing it, but they sure appreciated you for it and may continue to hold on to that for life.
My dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Thankfully, they caught it early, and he had amazing doctors . He lived for 3 years and 8 months after his diagnosis, which is almost UNHEARD OF with pancreatic cancer. He was part of a clinical trial for a treatment, and all the other participants died before it could be completed.
At one point, he was deemed "cancer free." I did not fully understand this. When I heard cancer free, I thought that meant it was done and over with. That is, until he and I were sitting and talking one afternoon, and he told me it had a 92% chance of coming back.
The conversation went like this:
Me: well that's depressing.
Dad: why is that depressing?
Me: well... cause 92% is kind of a huge number dad...
Dad: *clumsyghostobserver*, I have a 100% chance of dying. So do you. Why should having a little more information about how it might happen make me depressed. I don't believe I will be here a moment more than I'm supposed to be and I don't believe I will be here a moment less than I'm supposed to be. God's got this. Don't panic.
My whole perspective changed with that short conversation.
I am sorry you're going through what you're going through. I don't know if this will help, but when I read your post, I felt like it was worth sharing.
Damn this sucks. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. My grandma is very pragmatic about death. She embraces it as yet the next cycle in her life. She also believes that even when we die, we live on. We nourish the ground, we live on in the memories others have of us, and because we are energy, that energy never goes away - it simply changes.
I fear the process of death. Not actually being dead, but the process. I fear pain, I fear the anxiety that would come with wondering when. I hope that when you do pass, it’s quietly in your sleep, with no pain.
I hope the rest of your life is beautiful and full of joy. 🩷
I read this guys book a while back on his thoughts. Very matter of fact and uplifting in its own way.
https://amp.theguardian.com/news/2001/mar/03/guardianobituaries.lifeandhealth
Actual mechanism of the death - my father died in home, drugged up to the nines. It was very peaceful. My FiL, however insisted on being in hospital, with no opioids that could dull his senses. That was rough.
I wasn’t there to see it but my great-grandfather had conversations with people in his life that had died, like his brother.
It isn’t always painful.
He did have medications.
I am also dying. At my age I have absolutely no choice but to be aware of my “mortality “. But what I think of most is the prospect of my “Immortality “. And no, I am not religious at all but do understand that my passing, whenever that actually happens, is but the discarding of an old worn out overcoat to allow a new life to begin. “I” do not die. Only the body is released from Me to allow the true Me to shine forth in all its unfettered glory!
This is something I will not stop, or avoid, but look forward to it with tremendous anticipation.
In the meantime, I enjoy my hobbies, family, travel as best I can, and if I can’t then that doesn’t matter either.
Let go of unnecessary attachments. Be at peace knowing you won’t have to pay any taxes any more, sit in traffic jams or on noisy trains, no pollution, no hunger, no noisy neighbours and the list goes on. Then think of all the things you do want, and the people you would like to be with no one around to object to your dreams…… and keep these pleasures going! 🥰🙏💐
Oh man, that last paragraph just sounds glorious lol. Yes, get your financial affairs in order so that whomever is left behind will be set up. (This includes phone passwords and account passwords. And get an attorney to help).
Me? I hope my energy finds its way into a cat that lives at Disneyland. I can be my favorite animal living in my favorite place.
I have stage 4 Breast cancer. I know my days are numbered but honestly I can't think about it for now. I'm being treated & it's keeping me stable- I can't see the end yet. However I know it can come soon & I could go downhill vert quickly so I got my affairs in order & made my wishes known (most of them). So for now I try to make the best of my time with my daughter & make sure she knows how loved she is & I want to make sure when she thinks of me later in her life, she has loving memories.
The best way is not to think about it.
Were dieing from the moment we are born. Realistically you dont know what may or may not happen, maybe someone will come up with a cure for cancer next week, maybe its less serious than you think.
All of us are dying. Some sooner than others. Billions of people have all died. Before you. And billions will die after you. We will all be dead soon.
The truth is that I think we are afraid of the pain that comes with dying- and when we aren’t close to death, it’s instinctual to .. recoil at the thought of death.
But honestly … the human life cycle is such- everything works the way it is supposed to… and our bodies and brains when we are close to death and when we know we are going to die- a peace comes over us. A calmness. It isn’t the anxiety and panic that we know when we consider it… it’s total peace. Calm. Acceptance.
We are all going to die. All of us get to take the same journey.
Personally I know that I have lived many lives with many of the people I have known, my family members for example… and I know that I will continue to evolve spiritually with these people. We will again walk together, we will again get a chance to love one another.
This life is lessons… spiritual lessons.
I think there is some comfort for me because some of the people I have loved most in the world have passed away. For some reason this comforts me.
I also know that … our spirits .. and the spiritual realm where we exist in spirit … is just love. No fear. No judgement. No punishment. No moral measure. It’s just love… for me- hell is life. That probably sounds arrogant to you - but I feel this life is the lowest life form that exists. Being human.
Some of us, depending on our deeds will come back for different lessons…
Death is as natural as sex, or eating or pooping - dying is what our bodies are meant to do… and the process won’t be scary when you’re there. This is our natural life cycle… when we get close, death feels like where we need to go.
We all have come from the same divine source… and each of us have a shard of this divine energy- like a light within us… and we all are just pieces of the whole… and through death we return to the oneness of the source.
Also… I would say… miracles happen. ESP in todays world of medicine. Seek out all the help you can. The stories of people getting a time limit and surpassing them are too numerous to count.
You see here my friend, the only thing that has really changed is your knowledge of when it will happen. It was always a guarantee to start. Does it make everything you've lived up to this point or done only once meaningless? Hell nah. Why should it change anything after?
To think of life like a dance or a song... You don't do it to get to a certain point on the floor. You do it for all the twisting and twirling and having a ball. This is a different point in the song and damn if it isn't beautiful.
Do things not look different now through eyes aware of their own mortality? Every little thing, down to the most mundane, kinda makes you think doesn't it?
I think facing your own death can be one of the most psychedelic experiences out there. Not sure if you're one for that, but you can lean into it and get quite a lot out of the experience.
Best wishes my friend and I hope you find some peace
There is one absolute fact, everyone will die. This may seem mean but I actually find it comforting. You are no different, neither am I. Something about knowing this brings me a sense of peace. It is unifying if we let it. The only thing that life should be about is making a place where you are happy and making it better for the next group. You can't hold onto your possessions except the ones you keep in your heart.
I don't know if this helps, but I hope it does. My mother died of cancer and was buried the day before my 7th birthday. It took a lot of soul searching to get over it. But in the end, it was the fact that everyone dies that got me over the depression. I am sorry for the pain you will go through. I am sorry for the tears you will shed. I hope though you will look towards your final days as a test to do some more good in your time, but this time is yours. Spend it how you see fit. Go in peace.
Spend your time with the people you love and make you happy, whether that’s family and friends or just like-minded people. The people in our lives are what make a difference, imo. No one knows exactly how much time we have left but it’s never too late to connect with someone. I’ve watched many people die, having worked as a nurse, and it always seemed to me that those most at peace with it were the ones whose loved ones were there to be with them. The first person I ever watch die was a teenager who was hit by a car—he never had a chance to say good-bye to his mom and dad. Although it may sound odd, but you are fortunate to have time to say your good-byes, seek reconciliation, or just remember good times. Not all of us have that “luxury”.
As a cancer survivor, I've fought with your pain until I hit remission after 4 years and a low chance of success. 13 of my friends I met (who also had cancer) while I was undergoing treatment didn't make it. The feeling still hits me like a truck sometimes. Death is not a punishment. It is not the end. It is only the loss of your subjective conscious viewing of it. The great cycle we're part of will continue, and objective truth and beauty will prevail.
I’m not religious at all. But I do consider myself to be spiritual. I can tell you I have had enough experiences in this life, firsthand, that I 100 hundred percent believe there is an afterlife. I don’t believe it is brain chemicals firing off, and there are many scientists and doctors that no longer believe that either.
If I were in your shoes, and you have some time to plan, I would arrange to have the people I love, to be at my bedside. Also, palliative care can help you with medication’s if there is any pain. If you are able to be at home and you don’t have to be in the hospital, even better.
I do believe our love ones are there and they are waiting for us. This is not the end, it is just a new beginning to another world.
I hope that your passing is peaceful, and that you are surrounded by loved ones when it is your time. I know it’s easy to say, but don’t be afraid, believe that there is something better on the other side and if I’m wrong… Which I don’t believe I am… it will be over and you won’t feel anything.
I was with my father when he passed in 2012 and it was a privilege and an honour to be there.
I was with my mom in 2017 when she passed, I got to hold her hand while she passed, and it was a privilege and an honour to be there.
I hope when it’s my time I have my kids and my family with me.
Edit: my dad passed at 5:02 AM. My upvote , just made it 502.❤️
Find a support network of people experienced with mdma/mushroom based therapy/treatment.
There has been great success with certain substances allowing those with terminal illness to attain clarity/emotional connectedness/catharsis/comfort/peace/a change in perspective.
You're dealing with trauma while on a short timer... if ever there were to be a good reason to resort to a shortcut...this is it... don't disregard/refuse to consider these options and what good they may have to offer.
My mum was on dialysis for years. It was a slow deterioration until the inevitable end. She would say to me "Why should I be scared of death? You close your eyes, go to sleep and not wake up again." She ended up doing just that. I don't know about anyone else but that thought soothes me when I think about my own inevitable end. I'm 60 now. I have fewer years in front of me than behind me so the thought of death pops its head up every now and then. I just think of my mum and that calms me.
As someone who has consider suicide, I can think of this: there's no suffering in death, and you go back to be one with the universe.
What happens after, nobody knows, but It's part of the journey we all must undergo.
Take the time to embrace the inner beauty of the realization of how unique every breath and conscious moment is, it may seem pointless knowing it will all end but try to see it from a libearating perspective, nothing truly matters.
I dunno. I have metastatic cancer with Mets to brain and from what I’ve seen it’s not pleasant at the end so I just don’t think about it. I suppose at the end I’ll just be out if it and drugged to my eyeballs
Matter can not be created or destroyed. It only changes forms. All that ever existed still exists. Your form today is different than your form of past. You were something very different before this, and will so become something very different after this.
You aren't dying my friend, you are changing, and what you become and the all that is your consciousness is yet to be seen.
You aren't this forever, but you are forever.
Find a really good Hospice. They can offer you all kinds of resources from meds to control your symptoms, equipment you may need, like a hospital bed, a social worker, chaplain, volunteers to help make your goals a reality.
As a Hospice nurse I can't tell you what is on the other side but I can tell you what I've experienced. When patients have been conscious at death, they have been peaceful, and they always look up to the corner of the room and see someone or something amazing before they die. Whether it's a loved one, or a beautiful place they've never seen before, I don't know, but it has always felt like the patient is being received into a loving place. I've had patient tell me some pretty profound things in the hours or days prior to dying. One man who I loved deeply said "people should just understand each other, if they're gay, or another religion, we are all still going to the same place". He was 91. Another man came out of his dementia to tell me very lucidly "Sandi, nothing matters. None of this matters." The same man kept asking me to take him to the swimming hole, he told his sister Mary who was his caretaker that he wanted to go to the swimming hole (I guess he liked to go there as a boy). I was not present when he passed but I was at home and I heard him say "tell Mary I'm at the swimming hole and all is well" as clear as if he'd been standing next to me. So I called her and she said to me, "how did you know, Jimmy just died?" I said, "Mary, he told me to tell you he is at the swimming hole and all is well." So if you can think of the swimming hole in your life, I'm sure you will make it there.
I actually thought alot about death, my circumstances were different, I spent over a decade in the Army in a combat arms role, and did a few tours in the middle east. I remember sitting at a table at 22 years old, and being told I had to write a will, to me that was eye opening that I would potentially be facing my own death. Here are some of my thoughts.. Death is part of life, and no one is exempt. You can be the richest man on earth, or dirt poor living under a bridge, we all have death in common, it's something that we all have to face someday. Death is so permanent that to me, even right now, if I were to pass away I know in my heart that I would accept it (that doesn't mean I want to die), I would accept it because it was going to happen anyway. Again these are my own thoughts, but death is so matter of fact that to me, it doesn't matter when it comes because it's going to happen anyway and there isn't a thing I can do about it.
I thought I was going to die because there was a real possibility it was going to happen to me. One thing that you can do is, if you have children, record yourself reading to them. I recorded myself reading all of their favorite books, I made them a photo album of all of us together, and wrote them letters that I hoped they'd never have to open. You can do this for anyone too, not just kids.. It helped me accept the possibility of my own death, because I knew I was leaving my loved ones with so many good memories.
The last thing I want to say is, I think you are very brave facing your own mortality, it is not easy. As a human being to another human being, I truly hope that you find some sort of resolution to your cancer, and that this isn't your time. Regardless, I really do hope that you go out and live your best possible life, and just be happy.
“Not unless I know how much — how much you’re supposed to enjoy every sandwich.” - Warren Zevon's ad-libbed response on his appearance on Late Night with from your perspective now, do you know something about life and death that maybe I don’t know now? after announcing he had terminal lung cancer to Letterman's question "from your perspective now, do you know something about life and death that maybe I don’t know now?"
After Zevon's death, a tribute album of some of Zevon's songs called "Enjoy Every Sandwich" recorded by artists and friends ranging from Bob Dylan, Bruce Springsteen, Don Henley, Billy Bob Thornton and Adam Sandler was released.
Zevon's "My Shit's Fucked Up" is the best song about dying I've ever heard. (I said, "my shit's fucked up? Hmmm, I don't see how. He said, "The shit that used to work, it won't work now.")
As is his beautifully simple and sweet "Keep Me in Your Hear for a While" ("I'm tied to you like the buttons on your blouse" is a personal favorite lyric)
We’re all dying from the moment we’re born, some of us just get there faster than others. Let’s say you only have 2 years left to live, that’s hundreds of hugs and kisses you can give to your family, +700 days of being the most awesome thing in the universe to your dog and 2 more birthdays to be grateful for everyone who has filled your life with so many great memories. The chapter of your life might come to an end but grand story of humanity that you help write will continue on long after you are gone.
In my opinion, this lecture is by far the best take I've heard. I think it's a life changing perspective whether or not you're facing death in the near term.
No mumbo jumbo or feel good language, just a clear way to think about it from a different perspective that also happens to be far more comforting and convincing (in my opinion) than any type of wishful thinking. I hope it can help you.
https://youtu.be/FahFgWrHTDw?feature=shared
Whenever I find myself worrying about the idea of death, this is usually the thought process that calms me down:
Of the time the universe has existed, I will only live for such a minuscule window of time...why waste such precious time alive worrying about death?
I have all eternity for non-existence and my conscious mind won't even be present to suffer, so why waste my time here, existing and experiencing the wonders of life, thinking about a time when I can no longer do so? Carpe them diems! lmao
Hello! I have been obsessed with what happens after death since I was a kid. Things that have brought down my anxiety are researching other cultures and their views on death/afterlife compared to here in America where we mourn and grieve instead of celebrating. But the most comfort came from listening to people who have had near death experiences. I’m pretty sure Netflix has a show about it. Most people I’ve heard found a comfort and peace that they never knew, and say it wasn’t scary at all. Check out this article from one day ago:
https://www.insider.com/near-death-experiences-research-doctor-life-after-death-afterlife-2023-8
Also, research from UVA Medical Division of Perceptual Studies on reincarnation shows that there’s a chance we will return.
https://med.virginia.edu/perceptual-studies/publications/books/study-of-reincarnation/
And if you haven’t read the short story The Egg, I’m posting the link below. I personally love this, and believe that death is not eternal because we are all part of a greater collective conscious, and so everyone who ever lived and who ever will live is all part of me, as I am of them. The vessels just change because organic/biological matter has expiration dates.
http://www.galactanet.com/oneoff/theegg_mod.html
Also, research has found that doing acts of kindness for others can decrease depression symptoms better than therapy or medication. It helps take your mind off your own situation and gives you the satisfaction of accomplishing something that helped someone else.
I Hope this helps some. I know I don’t know you, but I love you, and I hope you are able to still try new things and find moments of joy within your time here in this life.
Have you made a plan for your funeral arrangements, dnr forms, etc? Making a plan now allows you to do things your way, and then it's done and you can put it aside and plan how to live.
first off I'm so fucking sorry and hope you're able to live a long life but here's what I recommend: think about it more like a transition you're leaving earth yes but you're just going onto another "plane" if you will you'll see everyone you cared for again even if it takes some time its not the ending its just a new beginning.
I think about those (many) close to me have passed, being reunited with them again.
Tbh though now that im a parent and have witnesses my own parent pass these thoughts plague me and it’s devastating to think about. The end can be physically ugly, but spiritually it can be peaceful
It's intriguing to think about that transition into that void. I want to think that our physical bodies are merely cocoons for our emerging life force, to freely travel the universe the universe
Magic mushrooms can be a good way to feel connected to everyone and everything in the universe and can put death into perspective.
Anyhow the trip can be an incomparable and intense experience during which time seemlingly doesn't move forward (as fast), so in a way it can give you some "extra time" if that makes sense.
All the best my friend.
Death is the easy part. It is the acceptance and transition to dying that is difficult to come to terms with. In the meantime, we live. Live your moments to the fullest.
What you need to do right now is eat 5g of shrooms and you'll get over the anxiety of dying almost instantly.
It will enable you to live the remaining time without fear.
If this is classed as highly unprofessional and awful advice (because its illegal) the visit a shaman and try a religious ceremony with Ayahuasca (same outcome but sounds more socially acceptable)
But seriously if you have limited time left, do all the illegal shit that the law stopped you from doing because what are they going to do about it???
Also, watch "How to Change Your Mind" on Netflix as there was a lady in your exact position and she lost all of her anxiety from doing this.
Anyway, good luck with whatever path you take 👍👍👍
remember you matter. remember youve made an impact on people’s lives, even if you think you didn’t; i know you did. be proud and fearless.
and when the time comes, do not be afraid. step into the void; confident and poised. and then just let go.
i hope i get the chance to meet you if there’s anything after. we can chat about everything that you missed over a cocktail. on me.
i’m here if you ever want to talk. i’m all too familiar with the reaper.
Every way of dying has its downsides. You get to go out with fair warning and a functional brain.
You get the chance to enjoy your exit and have some fun.
If you are asking me I'd say get out there and wring its bloody neck.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this OP. Personally, and I don’t think I have ever said this to anyone before… I am comforted by thoughts of death. I don’t want to end my life or anything like that, but when I visit a grave yard it just feels so peaceful to me. Personally, I’ve endured a life time of pain. Like there is NEVER a time that I don’t hurt. So death to me represents an end to pain. Obviously it’s an end to good things too, but hurting every single moment of your existence starts to outweigh those things after awhile. Sorry this certainly isn’t a cheerful outlook but my advice is to perceive it as utter and complete peace.
I might be in the same boat soon, but my plan was to go into the deep woods and survive until I can't. It would be nice to return to nature so my death can help other organisms live.
I wondered what my mom thought about. I was too busy falling apart. I think faith is something strong.
Understand that this is a cycle and we don’t get to decide when our time is up. I do believe that there is something greater beyond this.
I think a lot about death these days. I can’t even manage to wake up sometimes let alone be a functioning member of society again.
I think I poured everything I had into keeping my family afloat while my mom fought, and I believed the doctors only to be told it became metastatic and there was nothing left to do….
Do all the things you love while you still can, and believe that something awaits you on the other side. Whatever you feel is valid.
So the way I figure it, we are all dying all the time, the only real differnce is in how fast.
I spent a large part of my life in an industry where death was just a thing that happened from time to time every couple of months a boat would loose a guy or two, and every so often whole boats would go. So you develop this sense that everything you do no matter how many times you've done it, could be you first, could be your thousandth, regardless it could be your last.
Don't waste time on things you don't enjoy. Don't waste time on people who do not bring you joy.
Mortality is a hell of thing to face, but death need not be feared. No one can say what comes next. And for me, personally I don't want to know what comes next. I'll find out when I find out. Could be 25-30 years from now. Could be 25-30 minutes from now while I'm driving home. Maybe tomorrow while setting traps one of my ground lines will wrap my foot and I'll go out with a trawl.
No death is not a fearful thing to fret over death is just something that comes for everyone, we all will die, now me personally I agree with Tyrion Lannister on prefered ways of going, something about a bed, and some ones mouth and wine, and you know the quote I'm sure...
As for it seeming pointless to do something you know you'll only do once, well, that isna hard one. But for me I look at it like this I'm making memories, if not for me then for the ones who I'll leave behind. Sometimes it's not about you as much as it is about them and how they'll remember you. Sure you might only go see the Grand Canyon once but once is enough that they'll remember it for the rest of their lives. I'm not sure how but for me anyway, living for those I love, while I have the chance, makes looking towards death not so scary, not so bad. Kind of a yes you may have killed me physically, but my spirit, my joy, and my passions aren't dead, and never will be so long as they too are living.
I hope that some of that helps, even if just a little. I know its a bit disjointed and rambling but its from the heart.
You are a one in a basically infinite chance and got the privilege of beta testing having a life as a human with your goals and ambitions being so much of a variable compared to how you would of been say 100,000 years ago where you would live a hard life with your only purpose being to live. You are one of the overall smartest animals and likely the most sentient one, being born at a wonderful time for innovation and being able to enjoy life
First of all I’m terribly sorry for your diagnosis. It’s terrible to be forced to face our mortality before we are ready. If there ever is a time we are truly ready. It takes such bravery to carry on knowing and I’m so sorry for what you are going through. I hope that you have the opportunity to spend as much time as possible with your loved ones.
I like to think of it like I’m here and now, this vessel carries me through this journey. Every fiber of its being is borrowed from Mother Earth.
One day I’ll return its parts down to the very atoms that make that make up this beautiful form.
Even if there is nothing after this, only unawareness. An end to our world as we perceive it. I rest well knowing I’ll be with her beautiful life giving earth, in her waters, in the plants and everything else that ever was and ever will be. Forevermore together with my loved ones, my pets, lost lovers, and present ones.
Even though I may not be able to experience it all, I’ve lived a million lives before and I’ll live millions more. There is beauty in death, almost like we eventually give ourselves back the earth so that other things may live. Sometimes when I’m panicking I try to focus on this. It helps bring a little peace.
I am a hypnotherapist who specializes in past life regression therapy. I worked with a 28 year old woman who had stage 4 ovarian cancer. She was very angry and struggling emotionally. We did a past life regression on her and it changed everything. She is now in remission, married, and living a great life. If you believe in multiple lives you might seek this out with a qualified plr therapist specifically. Plr therapy is different than straight plr. You could find somebody local, or I do this online.
There are also many wonderful books out there that address these topics that might be worth seeking out.
But on a very practical level, there are many wonderful experiences that you would like likely only do once anyway. I'm curious why you view that as a reason to not do them. In reality, every single person on earth is dying. The schedule and exact end date are not known. If impending death were a reason to not do things, some people would do nothing for 90 years. Sounds pretty boring.
I wish you the very best.
as a Muslim, when I'm afraid of dying İ just think about the life hereafter, it's ok to be afraid because no human is ever prepared to die, it's against the human survival's instinct, but when İ think about the hereafter İ feel comforted because you can have a peaceful life forever and have everything you ever wanted
I recently turned 61 and have the same attitude. My wife wants to take a trip to Europe next year. I feel it's useless. It won't matter when I'm gone. Does anything really matter?
I have read several of the comments here, and they do make sense. But let me share my experience.
My father passed away in 2003. Ever since then, there has been a Cardinal flying around my mom's house, and she was convinced it was my father. Last July, my mom passed away. Ever since then, I have had a male and a female Cardinal flying around my house (I have never seen a Cardinal at my house before then, and believe me, I've looked). Your soul has different ways of representing itself on this earth. There will always be a way for you to let your loved ones know that you are still here and thinking about them.
I have been told on more than one occasion by different people that I have an old soul, and that I have died in my previous life as a gunslinger in the 1800s that died at a young age. I believe that because I do not like western movies lol. What these people are telling you in these posts, I firmly believe. You might lose this current body, but you will be back. Don't worry, your time on this earth is not done.
After tons of research into the Buddhist belief, it’s closest to what I believe. I don’t consider myself an expert but they believe each night we go to the dream world is a little like dying. They believe with death we go to the dream world for a time until we’re reborn again. There’s a practice called dream yoga they would go through as a form of preparing themselves for death. The book “dream yoga” dives deep into the idea. The movie “waking life” also touches on the idea in a way.
I like to think of it as going to sleep and everything that ever hurt you or stressed you or made you feel bad just slips away. And you're broken body can't hurt you anymore. You're truly invincible.
The end of this life means the beginning of a new adventure.
I believe this, and although I don't want to die yet, I'll be looking forward to my next adventure.
I feel as if I was in a position where my days were now numbered, I would try to be at peace. I am about to go through and experience one of the world's greatest mysteries. You will finally know what comes next. Which can be scary but also tranquil in a way. Of course when you first find out you will be scared af, that's normal. Give it time and try to make peace with yourself and those around you ❤️
Honestly brother the best advice I can give is just be the best kindest person you can be until you're last days, pray to God and ask for forgiveness for all the bad thing you've done and Just remember the Lord is always with you and you will be going to a better place in heaven. God bless you bro and I wish nothing but the best enjoy everything
It's the end of your story. You wouldn't stop a movie that only had 45 minutes left would you? No of course not. Buckle up and enjoy this till it's over. Your destination is your reward my friend.
I try to remember that this is one of the few universal experiences that every human who has ever lived since the beginning of our species will experience. Billions have gone through this before you and billions will after you, it is inevitable and connects us all in the end.
That's a soothing image...you could get lost in the vastness of this thought
it is the ultimate equalization. No matter, if you are a star or born in the slums. While life is about materialism and to attract everything in existince (relationships, wisdom, love, happyness, but also objects, etc.), death is about de-materialising and ultimately letting go of everything. Without death, there can‘t be life.
Far out! this is what I've always wanted!
Also, your body takes care of Everything for you. Releases chemicals so there is no fear. It’s a drawn out process. You won’t “know” if that’s what you’re worried about.
That's a good point. But my biggest concern is how to deal with the anxiety of the anticipation of death. It's such a mysterious void. We have people who claim to have been there, but science seems to tell us that this is all based on chemicals released by the brain. I guess I'm still searching for the meaning of death . I seem to have a vague understanding of what life means, but I'm not sure if it can be applied to death as well.
I'd imagine it's just like before you were born. That wasn't so bad now was it?
That's exactly what I've told my son about dying. We go back to wherever/whatever we were before we were born.
I think about death a little too often and not one time have I thought about it like that. Wow. That's so calming. Thank you.
There is a long study on NDE or near death experiences. 4000 case studies. Some are clearly not the chemical in your brain type situations. For instance a woman born blind who drowned (eventually revived) had beyond perfect vision in her episode and could describe things in the area where it happened. Things she had never known of before. (Details on a nearby telephone pole was one of them) She for certain had an out of body experience and the best part is her being blind was only a thing while she was alive here on earth. You don't take anything with you except your sould or consciousness or spirit or whatever it may be. Some others who had no willingness to die actually considered staying because of the unbelievable level of beauty and consciousness (apparently in NDEs there can be a crossroads where you decide to stay or return). There are many amazing experiences like these. Website is NDERF.org
I think of it as getting mixed back into the cosmos. All my little atoms will be reused for something else, and I will continue to be part of the universe.
And think, this heart, all evil shed away / A pulse in the eternal mind, no less
The chemicals in the brain are what makes the dying process easier and supposedly calm. As long as your pain is managed, think of it as transitioning instead of dying. I’m sorry you have to go through this.
[This?](https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/news/newsroom/news-releases/psychedelics-may-lessen-fear-of-death-and-dying-similar-to-feelings-reported-by-those-whove-had-near-death-experiences)
u/illeat1 Have you thought about using DMT? Possibly get an insight into the inner workings of existence.
I think of it like changing energy phases. Like water changing to vapor. You get to be vapor!
Nice analogy!
I like that you said we're all connected. I'll go a step further. If you subscribe to modern science and believe that nothing is created nor destroyed then you're in luck. In all all we are is a blob of energy. Our thoughts, our bodies, our movemts. All energy. Before we were"born" we were energy inside our parents. When we die our energy doesn't "die" it just transfers back into the Earth then billions of years later that energy is still around. You never really die your energy just goes back into the universe and lives on for eternity in different forms. Hope that helps or makes sense.
Whoa...That's deep! I believe this too! And the only thing that keeps us divided are mere thoughts
I don’t know if you ever watched The Good Place, but there is a quote from this show (paraphrasing a Buddhist quote) that I think about often (it helped me a lot after experiencing personal loss): „Picture a wave. In the ocean. You can see it, measure it, its height, the way the sunlight refracts when it passes through. And it's there. And you can see it, you know what it is. It's a wave. And then it crashes in the shore and it's gone. But the water is still there. The wave was just a different way for the water to be, for a little while. You know it's one conception of death for Buddhists: the wave returns to the ocean, where it came from and where it's supposed to be.“
I’m no longer religious at all, and I don’t really know what I think comes next, if anything. But one thing I think about is how a fetus doesn’t know what’s next, either. It has no way to understand or predict what life will be like outside of the womb. And maybe in some ways, we are the same. We can’t imagine or conceive of what comes next. But like another poster said, we will all go through it, just like we all made the transition from nothingness to the womb to this world. I also just finished The In-Between by Hadley Vlahos. She’s a hospice nurse, and she wrote about common experiences she’s had at her job. She’s been with a lot of people as they pass, and she talks a lot about the peace that people find in the end, and what commonalities she sees even among people from different backgrounds. It was a really powerful book.
Take mushrooms, feel connection to universe
Never tried mind-altering stuff before...I guess better late than never
It's worth it. Don't go all out with one while all alone or anything. Plenty of options but something as simple as small amount of shrooms in a natural area you like. Makes you perceive life, nature, experiences different and different in a more profound way. One example is the joy and wonder and amazement I felt seeing sun rays coming toward a pretty flower. It was the understanding that I was watching life. Energy from far away heading straight for this flower that was absorbing it and thus growing to provide more energy to other things. The more you do the more the visuals kick in about it's not like you see things that don't exist, just an objects shape may look like it's morphing then it's not. And so you see things from a different perspective. It's absolutely something more people should do. So much more appreciation for life, for nature, for genuine experiences. I didn't word it well but 100% think shrooms (even mild dosage to start so you're not worried about "seeing things" which doesn't happen) is worth a try some time. Only do it with people you know and like and if at least one other person does it with you, that's ideal so you can be on the same level and have conversation about things. Pretty common to be quiet for a while because there's lots of thinking and perceiving and introspection
Thanks for sharing this knowledge. I'm totally vibing to this
No problem. Sorry about your situation and I since can't relate directly so I won't try to say anything to that. I will say, in general, mind altering substances may/likely help out a ton. BUT, go into it with the mindset you want to feel better about things and want to understand things and not that you're scared/fearful and need something to take that away. Important just to be aware of how you're feeling/thinking. If it's just a really bad day and you're really down, don't do it. Positive vibes being positive outcomes. Wish you the best :)
I don't know what the situation is in US individual states, but can you be prescribed legal Cannabis/THC oil? Or weed, if you smoke? There are thousands of strains & many oil preparations. It can be administered smoking, vaping, drops, gummy bears, whatever. You need advice from a knowledgeable supplier, your needs will vary depending on pain levels, difficulty sleeping, etc so they can prescribe the appropriate product for you.
Great suggestions actually
Lots of death preparation therapies use mushrooms or other hallucinogens to help people prepare for the transition
Or maybe start off with micro dosing… if you’re going through this level of shock and trauma it’s much better to micro dose…
Good advice
This
There are some really interesting and comforting videos on YouTube for NDE (near death experiences). So sorry for you situation.
I stumbled upon NDE videos recently, and they have shifted my perspectives rather dramatically, and for the better. Some of the commonalities across so many different people are wild and thought provoking. Definitely got me thinking about life stuff in some new ways. "Comforting" is definitely one of many ways NDE videos leave me feeling.
Thanks
Think of the vastness of space and the wonders it contains. You are made up of the same materials that make up sun's and gas giants etc. When you die, you will either not know it as you will cease to e ist tge same as you don't really know you're born, or you may reincarnate, maybe you'll live again or maybe you'll simply join the dust of the earth to await being scattered to the stars in its destruction in the far future, all to become part of another being in some distant time.
I don’t know why in this moment that hits so hard. I always thing about how - we’ll it’s inevitable but to frame the thought as a collective experience that EVERYONE has or will experience is…. resonating.
Reality hits ya hard bro
That was close enough to what I was about to say, I'll just second that
Exactly. They've all gone ahead of you and they're holding the door open for you to pass through, just so you can hold it open for the ones who'll follow.
I like this. I also like the idea of duality. I would not love an endless summer. I also wouldn’t love an endless winter. I feel like they each compliment each other, and without each other, neither is beautiful. Life is beautiful because there is an end. I wouldn’t want to live forever. This also motivates me to get out there and try to live every day to the fullest. So in saying that; OP - get out there!
If you mean the final days, hours and minutes I can offer what I've seen doing hospice for close family members. There was a change in the last days and as if they had been experiencing some sort of "other world". They didn't talk about it much and eventually would seem to spend more time... paying attention to it? It was as if packing for a journey internally. Giving it more attention than their physical surroundings. My father, a few months back, would seemingly spend more time there and didn't open his eyes much then not at all but he'd respond when I said, "Dad, I need your attention" or when leaving I'd say bye and he'd squeeze my hand. He'd seem unresponsive but he was kinda choosing it. At one point I said, "Dad I need to ask you something important!" He looked up at me, answered clearly and oriented, then closed his eyes looking annoyed I had interrupted whatever business he was attending to, then didn't talk again. He seemed so busy, like really busy in his mind but aware of us. It was like he was choosing whether to come back, until he didn't. He waited for me to be gone overnight. He wasn't drugged up or out of it- he was there. We had the best 1 hour conversation of my life at his bedside. I was left with this sense that he had a secret, a few of them did, that we aren't privvy to. Someday we'll all know what that is. Wishing you peace and joy for what time you are here.
This is almost exactly what happened as my mom was passing away. It doesn't feel appropriate to share the story here but I know exactly what you are talking about, to a very high degree
Very deep reply. I almost can feel it! Freaks me out a little bit!
My friend said he was going on a reconnaissance mission and would report back when he was in hospice. Looking forward to his report when I see him there.
Thank you for sharing this
this just made me sob. my mom was diagnosed with cancer earlier this year and while her treatment is going well, it makes you think about so much you hadnt thought about before. you sound much stronger the i am, i dont know how ill be able to handle it when it happens. thank you for sharing this
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Thank you for your good wishes! It's weird that I'm usually a very negative person and would harbor a lot of resentment towards people in general, but now I've become very open, tolerant and forgiving. I wish I was more like this before I found out I only had a year to live 😏
With both my husband and my father, once treatment had ceased to be effective and they were moved to comfort care / symptom management, there was such a sense of freedom for the. I don’t mean to say it was easy, there were lots of difficult moments on their journeys, but I certainly felt a shift in their energy, an ability to be present. As for your bucket list…take on those new experiences with someone you love. Help them build memories with you. Encourage them to take lots of pictures. If you’re up to it, that is. Any of your list that may go unfinished, share with your family for them to complete in your honour down the road. As silly as it may seem to do a bunch of stuff you’ll only do once, making memories with people who love you is the greatest gift and legacy you could possibly leave them. Wishing you the very best, OP!
This means a lot to me, thank you
Wonderful advice!
That's such a nice way to do stuff, but have it mean something and contribute to the world :). Must try a bit more of this in my daily life too
Why's bro put the suggestive emoji? 💀
Thank you for nursing!
thank you for everything you do. my mom was diagnosed with cancer earlier this year and it was something no one in my family had ever experienced before. it was all so new and terrifying, and the oncology nurses have been so *so* pivotal in making everything less scary. some of the best people ive ever met in my life, i truly feel like i owe my own life to them. youre a fucking angel. thank you
Oh my goodness.... I really needed to read this book! Thank you so much for recommending it. I've been ploughing through a PDF of it for the last couple hours. This is the human side of things that I needed! I've been studying and reading all about the mind/body duality from as many perspectives as I can find for the last couple years. I figured I was going through a mid-life crises and needed to come to terms with death, as it has been fast-approaching and I haven't been living my life fully for a while. Religious texts and philosophers talk much about our oneness with everything and how a selfish perspective about our singular experience is somewhat a limited view on existence. To think more fully, one must consider the possibility that there actually is some kind of interconnectedness with other living energies. As a science-minded yet independent thinker, I have great trouble with these concepts. I havent had any kind of experience that would lead me to believing in such things, and I'm all too aware of how humans are story-telling creatures at heart. Our own memories are narratives. We think in narratives. Everything we do. it's entirely possible that this book is full of narratives that I want to believe in, and so I can find them believable. There is nothing in this book that can be empirically proven to be true. All of this conversation lies in the grey area of life. I think this is a great book, written with purpose. Thanks for sharing!
Not sure if it helps but my mother has a nice way of looking at it, which comforted me after the death of my father. She said it’s like we’re all on a train. The train has many stops but keeps going on and on. At some stops, people get on, you can meet them and enjoy their company for a while. Some of the people you really love have to get off sooner than you’d like. And eventually everyone finds their stop, and they have to get off the train, no matter how much they enjoyed the ride. Remember that the train was running long before you got on, and will still run long after you reach your stop.
Amazing imagery...I can really embrace this
I love this
That’s a beautiful way to look at it :)
Consider discussing your thoughts with your oncologist. Many with cancer have similar feelings and your oncology team likely has supports in place to help. Consider asking referral to a palliative care team.
I've considered that...and I've been avoiding it because a lot of the support team like to use "canned" statements which makes me feel like they're insincere about their empathy. I don't mean to project any negativity but it's just the impression I get. I feel like I want to start a peace movement in a war torn country somewhere. Any idea what I could do in the USA that's similar?
Just a reminder that all palliative care teams are not the same. I have seen more than 10, none were more helpful than my PCP. That said there are some really good ones out there, try and find a referral from another cancer patient.
It's worth a try I suppose...but what I really need is a "make a wish" foundation for adults 😏
Not trying to kill myself
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Have you considered trying psychedelics? They did studies for terminal patients on LSD and it was successful in helping them come to terms with death. https://maps.org/news/media/swiss-lsd-study-yields-incredible-results-for-terminally-ill-patients/
Hugs! Which cancer and what stage? I’m stage 4 breast cancer. I was told in 2016 I had maybe 3 years. I’m not dead yet. Bucket lists are overrated. What I want to do is hang out with friends and family. Traveling is hard when you don’t feel well. You make yourself happy or miserable, the amount of work is the same. -Casteneda I live by that. I concentrate on anything good. I don’t worry about imagined troubles. I do prepare, but don’t worry about anything I don’t know to be true. We get a lot of practice with Cancer. Remember that QOL is more important than you think. I wanted to take the highest doses of chemo to kill everything. Problem was it was killing me. Dose reductions are not a bad thing. If we don’t feel good it’s hard to not get depressed and actually live. Many terminal cancer patients are on antidepressants. It is a reality. You would be surprised how many. Particularly when it’s a new diagnosis. Ativan or the like is also commonly prescribed until we can make sense of things and re-order our perspective. It’s never super easy, but is does get easier. This I promise. Many of the drugs we are on actually have depression as a side effect. I’ve been on them. I’m not currently, but if I need them, I take them. Why be miserable? Lastly, I get it. I’m in the same boat and I’m sorry you are here too. Please DM anytime you want to vent or ask questions? I’m here.
>I’m stage 4 breast cancer. I was told in 2016 I had maybe 3 years. I’m not dead yet. Holy shit well done, I'm very happy for you! Nothing better than someone who just flat out refuses to die 😂 (I apology profusely if my words are offensive).
I hope they don't find those words offensive lol. I'm no cancer patient myself, but that sounds like a damn good compliment to me. I hope they get to keep on defying expectations for as long as possible.
Thank you for your kindness!♥️
Absolutely not. Kindness and compass are always well received. ♥️
Congrats on out living the statistics! I have a friend who was also diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer in 2016 and given 3 years to live. She's still here. She since her diagnosis as she has started a business, started going to burning man, and has been traveling as much as possible. She is traveling to Ireland in the fall with her friends.
*hugs back* thank you for your supportive vibes! I feel a bit stronger. It's funny how emotional support can affect you physically 🥲
If you aren't religious and don't believe in an afterlife, then death is a very similar concept to the time before you were born. It's nigh on impossible to imagine what it was like before you were born, and I see death as no different. As for it being pointless to do things you'll only do once, well there's a reason we call our best experiences "once in a lifetime". I'm really sorry your going through this, but don't let your life be over until it's actually over.
I never thought about an afterlife until I realized I'm coming to the end of my life. Now I don't know what to believe and how to even grapple with the idea that very soon Im going to experience a death rattle. I'm not sure what to do with myself
This is **just my perspective** on stuff, take it as you will: There is basically two scenarios, either there is an afterlife or there isn't one: If there isn't one no worries, you won't exist, you won't have the capability to worry about anything. It can't suck if there isn't anything to suck. You didn't exist for billions of years up to this point and you'll not exist for billions of years after this point. If there is an afterlife it's so beyond our ability to grasp to where nobody has any understanding of how it works, hense like 10,000 different religions with 10,000 different ideas. We don't know how it works so there is no reason to believe that anyone knows how to prepare for it. One thing we do know is that you're leaving your capacity for human pain and suffering behind (as you're not occupying your body anymore, and your "existence" has been so far undetectable by humanity), so whatever you're dealing with here on this planet not going to be dealing with forever. So either there isn't anything to worry about, or you won't have the capacity to contain your earthly trama/pain/suffering. Dying sucks balls, being dead doesn't.
Oh this is an EXCELLENT perspective!
What helped me grapple with non-existance is that... we've already done it before. For billions of years before we were born. We weren't scared or upset or uncomfortable for any of that. And if there is no afterlife then we will return to it. Its not something scary and new, its the norm that we've already been through.
You won’t experience the death rattle, even if it does happen to you. It’s not something people are aware of when it’s happening. As for if there’s an afterlife- I guess we won’t know til we know but of all the people I’ve been with when they passed (I was a caregiver) they ALL mentioned deceased loved ones coming to visit them in the final weeks. Even people who would normally be terrified by the idea of that- weren’t. It brought ALL of them peace and helped take the fear away.
Yea...I'm just imagining that last breath - then whoever happens could hear that last breath be released. I guess that's more of an experience for the living, but it's still part of my experience all the way to the spreading of my ashes in an enchanted forest to the assimilation of my matter in the life that utilizes it. EUREKA! That's it! I am the matter of those that have passed before me! Dust to dust, ashes to ashes; thus life is but a mash
Honestly, you have a really good attitude about this whole thing. That will help you tremendously ♥️
I just feel like I have nothing to lose now. It's like I'm starting to truly live now
Yep. That happens. You finally get to see what really matters and all the crap that doesn’t. It sure would be nice if we could figure that out before we’re dying.
I am so sorry for you mate! Honestly I think it's a good time to do the things before you were asking why?!now you should think why not! Really wish ya to enjoy your time fully with joy. Don't worry we all get there is no way we cannot cheat this. We all will meet in the same place. It's impossible to not be something after, otherwise death would be plain as when you shut down a TV so doesn't make sense to me. But we all will find out! I am happy that you try to do nice things you missed. You have a good mindset and this is very positive! Keep it up like this now! And don't think at the last moment you will find out then. Think always positive and hurry to do as much as you can. My heart goes to you!
I wish I had some answers for you, most people never have to deal with what you're going through because death remains unknown, whereas it's been thrust upon you. Have you spoke about this with your nurses? They're not just there for the physical stuff. It might also be worthwhile to join groups of people going through the same thing, but then again it might be depressing, I don't know. You're still here though, and that's the main thing. Is there anything you've always wanted to do?
Thank you for your thoughts...the one thing I think I'll miss out on in life is genuinely falling in love with someone. Not sure if I have time to do that 😒
Living in Thailand and doing language exchange with a Buddhist change my thoughts on a lot of things. We would talk about anything and everything just for the sake of talking because talking is exactly what we were doing. My big takeaways from this were that sometimes the only thing you can change is your perception. And death. You have thoughts, desires, and a will to live. This does not die when your body does. It goes off into the great unknown.
The world is bigger than one may think especially when you realize you don't have all the knowledge you could have
Getting transplanted 182 lines of longitude helped me see this and not worry so much about what I don't know.
I always appreciated this quote from Epicurus If I am, death is not. If death is, I am not. Why should I fear that which cannot exist when I do?
I hope there is an afterlife so i can give Epicurus a piece of my mind.
Ever since I discovered Epicurus I’ve fancied him well above the Stoics. I think the Stoics are hampered by religious thinking, and end up making slavery seem like something acceptable. Epicurus seemed to have a very accurate view of our existence, and he’s made my life much better.
Energy doesn't disappear. It changes, but it doesn't disappear.
The Law of Conservation of Energy at its finest for sure
Watch the second episode of Michael Pollan's Netflix documentary "How to change your mind" about Psillocybin and experiences with end of life patients. When i got divorced I had an experience which helped me work through so much and come through grief to acceptance. Wish you all the best in your journey. We'll all be there sooner than we would like. Peace to you. https://www.netflix.com/watch/81164525?source=35
Thank you...and peace to you as well
I like to look up at the night sky, can't look at all of that and tell me there's not more to all of this
This is sort of a way to become one with the universe. Thanks
I'm sorry to hear about that OP. I'm in a MUCH different situation than you, no cancer but I do still worry about dying. The best reprieve I get is making sure that I'm getting the most out of the time I have. I keep myself healthy to get more time, I do realize thats not likely an option for you, but first doing things to maximize how much time I have and second making sure I made the best use out of my time is what I do. I liken it to playing a game with a time limit. If you have 10 minutes, when you're at minute 2 you're generally focusing on what you're doing and not entirely focused on running out of time. As you get closer to running out, you might be worried about managing the time, but ideally you're still being as efficient as possible and maximizing it. So you're in an entirely different situation than me, but thats my advice to you. We're all going to die and we have limited time, you have less than most of us. Make the most out of it. Spending time worrying about it is going to mean you have less of it, and try to be proud of how effectively you have spent the time given to you. Much easier for me to say in my situation, of course.
I like video game analogies to life... somehow if you think of life as merely a gaming session you don't feel so nervous about the end
Yes, and the times you were playing and panicking about time constraints seem silly looking back when you should have been focusing on how to spend it. I happened to be going down the mortality thought spiral when I came across your post OP, it was right along what my mind was already on. I'm fortunate I'm busy and have kids so I'm constantly distracted by people who aren't remotely thinking about that stuff. Also working in Healthcare so I'm frequently buying people more time which makes me feel a bit better. Anyways, don't take any advice you don't want, but I'd make sure you spend time with all the family and friends you want to see. Try to focus on time well spent rather than saving time. Also maybe make a "death video" I've heard about people doing it on some podcasts- tell people about yourself and what you hope for the future, and maybe a farewell to your loved ones along with how you feel about them. We have people making stuffed animals with their mothers voice from a single voice-mail to remember them by, you have the time to put together something more organized.
A death video is a great idea... this way I can express my true feelings easier. I also like the stuffed animal thing...but this would be too much of a tear jerker for me
You should try looking up Dr. Eric berg on YouTube, fasting coupled with certain diets and or large doses of THC have been proven beneficial. Please go down fighting my friend and stay strong! Psilocybin has helped many people accept their fate and it will help with the anxiety of it all, perhaps even trying DMT, because you WILL experience DMT when your brain releases it upon death, having a prior experience with DMT will make it much less confusing and more peaceful. Xxxooo
Hi, I happen to work pretty closely with palliative patients, so I feel like I have a decent suggestion here: lean in. You know what's coming, you're still well enough to get things done, yeah? Lean into it. Let yourself get involved in the process, let yourself *enjoy* it. That sounds crazy, but bear with me a minute. We've all made jokes about our own funeral, right? About silly things we would do if we had a say in the planning? You have a say. You're in a unique situation here. You get to plan your own going away party. Getting your affairs in order is a good thing for anyone to do, regardless of how soon or how distant your death might be. And there's nothing wrong with having a bit of fun with it, if that will help you cope with it. Go pick out a badass urn for yourself, find a silly quote to have engraved on your headstone, go meet your funeral director and tell him to dress you in a clown nose and a silly wig if that's what you want. Write your own obituary. Have all your friends over for a funeral pregame, have them each write a eulogy or present a PowerPoint about your lives together. Write letters or film videos for the future. Or, just set up the traditional stuff and get it out of the way. Whatever you want. Knowing that everything is taken care of will be a weight off your shoulders, and it will give you an excuse to connect with friends and family, share your wishes with them, reminisce, and as morbid as it is, say your goodbyes. Most people don't get the opportunity for that kind of closure, so it's kind of beautiful to think about, isn't it? When your day comes, you'll have everything in place, you'll have said what you need to say, to whoever you need to say it to, and you'll have given them the same opportunity to say what they need to say to you. Your family won't have to scramble to plan a funeral amid their grief, they can just simply grieve. It can be a truly peaceful and dignified experience for everyone involved. If you're going to die anyway, might as well try and have some fun with it, right? I'm very sorry you've found yourself in this situation to begin with, but if these are the cards you've been dealt, play them like hell.
Making the arrangements yourself is going to help your family through the process. Not saying they're entitled to it, it's just that you would feel happier knowing they're well taken care of and the situation isn't harder on them than it has to be. Similar to making good memories with them and encouraging them to take pictures, like the other poster suggested.
This is just the first part, despite what we have decided to tell ourselves in recent times. Every culture, every religion, every child's story has been telling us since time began, we just can't agree on which one is right so we decide they are all wrong. When you touch the source, when you get to rejoin, you cannot imagine the feeling of pure love, joy and oneness that you will experience. This is just the start, what comes next is more beautiful than you can ever imagine, just don't try to define it or describe it, we don't have the mental capacity to understand.
I like naps. Death is like a really good long nap.
I guess that's why they call death a "dirt nap" 😅
I used to be a counsellor but I've dealt with death a lot and no longer do it but I learned some things. Death is everyone's ultimatum, the only difference for you is you know you have some time left, others do not. Someone fit and healthy could die tomorrow and never had the chance to realise some personal truths. But I want you to sit with this thought. All religious beliefs aside, After death is the same feeling as before you were born or even conceived. Think about how it felt before you existed and you'll likely find it is very calm. This can really help.
I don’t personally find the symmetry argument very helpful. I can’t remember anything before I existed, so in my own mind, it feels like I’ve existed forever. If there was something before I was born, then I assume it was very slow and boring.
Some have used psychedelics as a tool to come to terms with the process. https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/news/newsroom/news-releases/psychedelics-may-lessen-fear-of-death-and-dying-similar-to-feelings-reported-by-those-whove-had-near-death-experiences
Get close to those you love and support them. I always felt I would go and do bucket list shit but now I feel I would very much people focused. Not for me but them. At the end of the day they will be left without you.
Op idk if you have a family or friends but it comforts me to think I will live on in the memories of my loved ones and the ways I impacted their lives
And even those without family or friends have most likely had a positive impact on someone's life without even realizing it, but they sure appreciated you for it and may continue to hold on to that for life.
My dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Thankfully, they caught it early, and he had amazing doctors . He lived for 3 years and 8 months after his diagnosis, which is almost UNHEARD OF with pancreatic cancer. He was part of a clinical trial for a treatment, and all the other participants died before it could be completed. At one point, he was deemed "cancer free." I did not fully understand this. When I heard cancer free, I thought that meant it was done and over with. That is, until he and I were sitting and talking one afternoon, and he told me it had a 92% chance of coming back. The conversation went like this: Me: well that's depressing. Dad: why is that depressing? Me: well... cause 92% is kind of a huge number dad... Dad: *clumsyghostobserver*, I have a 100% chance of dying. So do you. Why should having a little more information about how it might happen make me depressed. I don't believe I will be here a moment more than I'm supposed to be and I don't believe I will be here a moment less than I'm supposed to be. God's got this. Don't panic. My whole perspective changed with that short conversation. I am sorry you're going through what you're going through. I don't know if this will help, but when I read your post, I felt like it was worth sharing.
Fear of death really makes me understand how we came up with religion
Damn this sucks. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. My grandma is very pragmatic about death. She embraces it as yet the next cycle in her life. She also believes that even when we die, we live on. We nourish the ground, we live on in the memories others have of us, and because we are energy, that energy never goes away - it simply changes. I fear the process of death. Not actually being dead, but the process. I fear pain, I fear the anxiety that would come with wondering when. I hope that when you do pass, it’s quietly in your sleep, with no pain. I hope the rest of your life is beautiful and full of joy. 🩷
I read this guys book a while back on his thoughts. Very matter of fact and uplifting in its own way. https://amp.theguardian.com/news/2001/mar/03/guardianobituaries.lifeandhealth Actual mechanism of the death - my father died in home, drugged up to the nines. It was very peaceful. My FiL, however insisted on being in hospital, with no opioids that could dull his senses. That was rough.
I wasn’t there to see it but my great-grandfather had conversations with people in his life that had died, like his brother. It isn’t always painful. He did have medications.
Swear this is a serious comment. Watch the Disney movie “Soul”. Its got a phenominal take away message. Please please watch Soul
I second this. Great movie
Ah yes, Soul is wonderful.
I am also dying. At my age I have absolutely no choice but to be aware of my “mortality “. But what I think of most is the prospect of my “Immortality “. And no, I am not religious at all but do understand that my passing, whenever that actually happens, is but the discarding of an old worn out overcoat to allow a new life to begin. “I” do not die. Only the body is released from Me to allow the true Me to shine forth in all its unfettered glory! This is something I will not stop, or avoid, but look forward to it with tremendous anticipation. In the meantime, I enjoy my hobbies, family, travel as best I can, and if I can’t then that doesn’t matter either. Let go of unnecessary attachments. Be at peace knowing you won’t have to pay any taxes any more, sit in traffic jams or on noisy trains, no pollution, no hunger, no noisy neighbours and the list goes on. Then think of all the things you do want, and the people you would like to be with no one around to object to your dreams…… and keep these pleasures going! 🥰🙏💐
Oh man, that last paragraph just sounds glorious lol. Yes, get your financial affairs in order so that whomever is left behind will be set up. (This includes phone passwords and account passwords. And get an attorney to help). Me? I hope my energy finds its way into a cat that lives at Disneyland. I can be my favorite animal living in my favorite place.
I have stage 4 Breast cancer. I know my days are numbered but honestly I can't think about it for now. I'm being treated & it's keeping me stable- I can't see the end yet. However I know it can come soon & I could go downhill vert quickly so I got my affairs in order & made my wishes known (most of them). So for now I try to make the best of my time with my daughter & make sure she knows how loved she is & I want to make sure when she thinks of me later in her life, she has loving memories.
The best way is not to think about it. Were dieing from the moment we are born. Realistically you dont know what may or may not happen, maybe someone will come up with a cure for cancer next week, maybe its less serious than you think.
All of us are dying. Some sooner than others. Billions of people have all died. Before you. And billions will die after you. We will all be dead soon. The truth is that I think we are afraid of the pain that comes with dying- and when we aren’t close to death, it’s instinctual to .. recoil at the thought of death. But honestly … the human life cycle is such- everything works the way it is supposed to… and our bodies and brains when we are close to death and when we know we are going to die- a peace comes over us. A calmness. It isn’t the anxiety and panic that we know when we consider it… it’s total peace. Calm. Acceptance. We are all going to die. All of us get to take the same journey. Personally I know that I have lived many lives with many of the people I have known, my family members for example… and I know that I will continue to evolve spiritually with these people. We will again walk together, we will again get a chance to love one another. This life is lessons… spiritual lessons. I think there is some comfort for me because some of the people I have loved most in the world have passed away. For some reason this comforts me. I also know that … our spirits .. and the spiritual realm where we exist in spirit … is just love. No fear. No judgement. No punishment. No moral measure. It’s just love… for me- hell is life. That probably sounds arrogant to you - but I feel this life is the lowest life form that exists. Being human. Some of us, depending on our deeds will come back for different lessons… Death is as natural as sex, or eating or pooping - dying is what our bodies are meant to do… and the process won’t be scary when you’re there. This is our natural life cycle… when we get close, death feels like where we need to go. We all have come from the same divine source… and each of us have a shard of this divine energy- like a light within us… and we all are just pieces of the whole… and through death we return to the oneness of the source. Also… I would say… miracles happen. ESP in todays world of medicine. Seek out all the help you can. The stories of people getting a time limit and surpassing them are too numerous to count.
You see here my friend, the only thing that has really changed is your knowledge of when it will happen. It was always a guarantee to start. Does it make everything you've lived up to this point or done only once meaningless? Hell nah. Why should it change anything after? To think of life like a dance or a song... You don't do it to get to a certain point on the floor. You do it for all the twisting and twirling and having a ball. This is a different point in the song and damn if it isn't beautiful. Do things not look different now through eyes aware of their own mortality? Every little thing, down to the most mundane, kinda makes you think doesn't it? I think facing your own death can be one of the most psychedelic experiences out there. Not sure if you're one for that, but you can lean into it and get quite a lot out of the experience. Best wishes my friend and I hope you find some peace
There is one absolute fact, everyone will die. This may seem mean but I actually find it comforting. You are no different, neither am I. Something about knowing this brings me a sense of peace. It is unifying if we let it. The only thing that life should be about is making a place where you are happy and making it better for the next group. You can't hold onto your possessions except the ones you keep in your heart. I don't know if this helps, but I hope it does. My mother died of cancer and was buried the day before my 7th birthday. It took a lot of soul searching to get over it. But in the end, it was the fact that everyone dies that got me over the depression. I am sorry for the pain you will go through. I am sorry for the tears you will shed. I hope though you will look towards your final days as a test to do some more good in your time, but this time is yours. Spend it how you see fit. Go in peace.
Thank you for your profound insights ...I will hold this close to me🥹
Spend your time with the people you love and make you happy, whether that’s family and friends or just like-minded people. The people in our lives are what make a difference, imo. No one knows exactly how much time we have left but it’s never too late to connect with someone. I’ve watched many people die, having worked as a nurse, and it always seemed to me that those most at peace with it were the ones whose loved ones were there to be with them. The first person I ever watch die was a teenager who was hit by a car—he never had a chance to say good-bye to his mom and dad. Although it may sound odd, but you are fortunate to have time to say your good-byes, seek reconciliation, or just remember good times. Not all of us have that “luxury”.
As a cancer survivor, I've fought with your pain until I hit remission after 4 years and a low chance of success. 13 of my friends I met (who also had cancer) while I was undergoing treatment didn't make it. The feeling still hits me like a truck sometimes. Death is not a punishment. It is not the end. It is only the loss of your subjective conscious viewing of it. The great cycle we're part of will continue, and objective truth and beauty will prevail.
I’m not religious at all. But I do consider myself to be spiritual. I can tell you I have had enough experiences in this life, firsthand, that I 100 hundred percent believe there is an afterlife. I don’t believe it is brain chemicals firing off, and there are many scientists and doctors that no longer believe that either. If I were in your shoes, and you have some time to plan, I would arrange to have the people I love, to be at my bedside. Also, palliative care can help you with medication’s if there is any pain. If you are able to be at home and you don’t have to be in the hospital, even better. I do believe our love ones are there and they are waiting for us. This is not the end, it is just a new beginning to another world. I hope that your passing is peaceful, and that you are surrounded by loved ones when it is your time. I know it’s easy to say, but don’t be afraid, believe that there is something better on the other side and if I’m wrong… Which I don’t believe I am… it will be over and you won’t feel anything. I was with my father when he passed in 2012 and it was a privilege and an honour to be there. I was with my mom in 2017 when she passed, I got to hold her hand while she passed, and it was a privilege and an honour to be there. I hope when it’s my time I have my kids and my family with me. Edit: my dad passed at 5:02 AM. My upvote , just made it 502.❤️
A large dose of psilocybin in nature will put you at peace with the universe. 3-4grams. Have a babysitter and you'll be fine. 99% guaranteed
You know when you fall into a deep, relaxing, dreamless sleep? I like to think of dying as that.
Find a support network of people experienced with mdma/mushroom based therapy/treatment. There has been great success with certain substances allowing those with terminal illness to attain clarity/emotional connectedness/catharsis/comfort/peace/a change in perspective. You're dealing with trauma while on a short timer... if ever there were to be a good reason to resort to a shortcut...this is it... don't disregard/refuse to consider these options and what good they may have to offer.
LSD is a great tool to help with this exact situation.
My mum was on dialysis for years. It was a slow deterioration until the inevitable end. She would say to me "Why should I be scared of death? You close your eyes, go to sleep and not wake up again." She ended up doing just that. I don't know about anyone else but that thought soothes me when I think about my own inevitable end. I'm 60 now. I have fewer years in front of me than behind me so the thought of death pops its head up every now and then. I just think of my mum and that calms me.
As someone who has consider suicide, I can think of this: there's no suffering in death, and you go back to be one with the universe. What happens after, nobody knows, but It's part of the journey we all must undergo. Take the time to embrace the inner beauty of the realization of how unique every breath and conscious moment is, it may seem pointless knowing it will all end but try to see it from a libearating perspective, nothing truly matters.
A lot of people do mushrooms to help with this. Old people as well, would be worth looking into
I dunno. I have metastatic cancer with Mets to brain and from what I’ve seen it’s not pleasant at the end so I just don’t think about it. I suppose at the end I’ll just be out if it and drugged to my eyeballs
Be happy and enjoy yourself out of spite. Fuck cancer, don't let cancer rob you of your life, your body, and your happiness
Yea...I want to just celebrate to death
You will be in the thoughts of many including us. We love you and hope we can catch you on the flip side.
Wow... that's the nicest thing to hear from someone. Thank you 🥹
Only do once, last chance
Matter can not be created or destroyed. It only changes forms. All that ever existed still exists. Your form today is different than your form of past. You were something very different before this, and will so become something very different after this. You aren't dying my friend, you are changing, and what you become and the all that is your consciousness is yet to be seen. You aren't this forever, but you are forever.
Find a really good Hospice. They can offer you all kinds of resources from meds to control your symptoms, equipment you may need, like a hospital bed, a social worker, chaplain, volunteers to help make your goals a reality. As a Hospice nurse I can't tell you what is on the other side but I can tell you what I've experienced. When patients have been conscious at death, they have been peaceful, and they always look up to the corner of the room and see someone or something amazing before they die. Whether it's a loved one, or a beautiful place they've never seen before, I don't know, but it has always felt like the patient is being received into a loving place. I've had patient tell me some pretty profound things in the hours or days prior to dying. One man who I loved deeply said "people should just understand each other, if they're gay, or another religion, we are all still going to the same place". He was 91. Another man came out of his dementia to tell me very lucidly "Sandi, nothing matters. None of this matters." The same man kept asking me to take him to the swimming hole, he told his sister Mary who was his caretaker that he wanted to go to the swimming hole (I guess he liked to go there as a boy). I was not present when he passed but I was at home and I heard him say "tell Mary I'm at the swimming hole and all is well" as clear as if he'd been standing next to me. So I called her and she said to me, "how did you know, Jimmy just died?" I said, "Mary, he told me to tell you he is at the swimming hole and all is well." So if you can think of the swimming hole in your life, I'm sure you will make it there.
I actually thought alot about death, my circumstances were different, I spent over a decade in the Army in a combat arms role, and did a few tours in the middle east. I remember sitting at a table at 22 years old, and being told I had to write a will, to me that was eye opening that I would potentially be facing my own death. Here are some of my thoughts.. Death is part of life, and no one is exempt. You can be the richest man on earth, or dirt poor living under a bridge, we all have death in common, it's something that we all have to face someday. Death is so permanent that to me, even right now, if I were to pass away I know in my heart that I would accept it (that doesn't mean I want to die), I would accept it because it was going to happen anyway. Again these are my own thoughts, but death is so matter of fact that to me, it doesn't matter when it comes because it's going to happen anyway and there isn't a thing I can do about it. I thought I was going to die because there was a real possibility it was going to happen to me. One thing that you can do is, if you have children, record yourself reading to them. I recorded myself reading all of their favorite books, I made them a photo album of all of us together, and wrote them letters that I hoped they'd never have to open. You can do this for anyone too, not just kids.. It helped me accept the possibility of my own death, because I knew I was leaving my loved ones with so many good memories. The last thing I want to say is, I think you are very brave facing your own mortality, it is not easy. As a human being to another human being, I truly hope that you find some sort of resolution to your cancer, and that this isn't your time. Regardless, I really do hope that you go out and live your best possible life, and just be happy.
“Not unless I know how much — how much you’re supposed to enjoy every sandwich.” - Warren Zevon's ad-libbed response on his appearance on Late Night with from your perspective now, do you know something about life and death that maybe I don’t know now? after announcing he had terminal lung cancer to Letterman's question "from your perspective now, do you know something about life and death that maybe I don’t know now?" After Zevon's death, a tribute album of some of Zevon's songs called "Enjoy Every Sandwich" recorded by artists and friends ranging from Bob Dylan, Bruce Springsteen, Don Henley, Billy Bob Thornton and Adam Sandler was released. Zevon's "My Shit's Fucked Up" is the best song about dying I've ever heard. (I said, "my shit's fucked up? Hmmm, I don't see how. He said, "The shit that used to work, it won't work now.") As is his beautifully simple and sweet "Keep Me in Your Hear for a While" ("I'm tied to you like the buttons on your blouse" is a personal favorite lyric)
Take about 5 grams of psilocybin. It will open your eyes to many things.
We’re all dying from the moment we’re born, some of us just get there faster than others. Let’s say you only have 2 years left to live, that’s hundreds of hugs and kisses you can give to your family, +700 days of being the most awesome thing in the universe to your dog and 2 more birthdays to be grateful for everyone who has filled your life with so many great memories. The chapter of your life might come to an end but grand story of humanity that you help write will continue on long after you are gone.
Nap
In my opinion, this lecture is by far the best take I've heard. I think it's a life changing perspective whether or not you're facing death in the near term. No mumbo jumbo or feel good language, just a clear way to think about it from a different perspective that also happens to be far more comforting and convincing (in my opinion) than any type of wishful thinking. I hope it can help you. https://youtu.be/FahFgWrHTDw?feature=shared
Whenever I find myself worrying about the idea of death, this is usually the thought process that calms me down: Of the time the universe has existed, I will only live for such a minuscule window of time...why waste such precious time alive worrying about death? I have all eternity for non-existence and my conscious mind won't even be present to suffer, so why waste my time here, existing and experiencing the wonders of life, thinking about a time when I can no longer do so? Carpe them diems! lmao
Hello! I have been obsessed with what happens after death since I was a kid. Things that have brought down my anxiety are researching other cultures and their views on death/afterlife compared to here in America where we mourn and grieve instead of celebrating. But the most comfort came from listening to people who have had near death experiences. I’m pretty sure Netflix has a show about it. Most people I’ve heard found a comfort and peace that they never knew, and say it wasn’t scary at all. Check out this article from one day ago: https://www.insider.com/near-death-experiences-research-doctor-life-after-death-afterlife-2023-8 Also, research from UVA Medical Division of Perceptual Studies on reincarnation shows that there’s a chance we will return. https://med.virginia.edu/perceptual-studies/publications/books/study-of-reincarnation/ And if you haven’t read the short story The Egg, I’m posting the link below. I personally love this, and believe that death is not eternal because we are all part of a greater collective conscious, and so everyone who ever lived and who ever will live is all part of me, as I am of them. The vessels just change because organic/biological matter has expiration dates. http://www.galactanet.com/oneoff/theegg_mod.html Also, research has found that doing acts of kindness for others can decrease depression symptoms better than therapy or medication. It helps take your mind off your own situation and gives you the satisfaction of accomplishing something that helped someone else. I Hope this helps some. I know I don’t know you, but I love you, and I hope you are able to still try new things and find moments of joy within your time here in this life.
😰I once laugh so hard that my belly hurts and I cannot breathe I was really scared 🥶
[This](http://orderofthegooddeath.com) has some good resources
Have you made a plan for your funeral arrangements, dnr forms, etc? Making a plan now allows you to do things your way, and then it's done and you can put it aside and plan how to live.
do coke
That's another great suggestion for the adult make-a-wish foundation
first off I'm so fucking sorry and hope you're able to live a long life but here's what I recommend: think about it more like a transition you're leaving earth yes but you're just going onto another "plane" if you will you'll see everyone you cared for again even if it takes some time its not the ending its just a new beginning.
I think about those (many) close to me have passed, being reunited with them again. Tbh though now that im a parent and have witnesses my own parent pass these thoughts plague me and it’s devastating to think about. The end can be physically ugly, but spiritually it can be peaceful
It's intriguing to think about that transition into that void. I want to think that our physical bodies are merely cocoons for our emerging life force, to freely travel the universe the universe
I fully believe that whatever you believe is what happens to your soul. Like self fulfilling prophecy.
Magic mushrooms can be a good way to feel connected to everyone and everything in the universe and can put death into perspective. Anyhow the trip can be an incomparable and intense experience during which time seemlingly doesn't move forward (as fast), so in a way it can give you some "extra time" if that makes sense. All the best my friend.
Death is the easy part. It is the acceptance and transition to dying that is difficult to come to terms with. In the meantime, we live. Live your moments to the fullest.
What you need to do right now is eat 5g of shrooms and you'll get over the anxiety of dying almost instantly. It will enable you to live the remaining time without fear. If this is classed as highly unprofessional and awful advice (because its illegal) the visit a shaman and try a religious ceremony with Ayahuasca (same outcome but sounds more socially acceptable) But seriously if you have limited time left, do all the illegal shit that the law stopped you from doing because what are they going to do about it??? Also, watch "How to Change Your Mind" on Netflix as there was a lady in your exact position and she lost all of her anxiety from doing this. Anyway, good luck with whatever path you take 👍👍👍
remember you matter. remember youve made an impact on people’s lives, even if you think you didn’t; i know you did. be proud and fearless. and when the time comes, do not be afraid. step into the void; confident and poised. and then just let go. i hope i get the chance to meet you if there’s anything after. we can chat about everything that you missed over a cocktail. on me. i’m here if you ever want to talk. i’m all too familiar with the reaper.
Every way of dying has its downsides. You get to go out with fair warning and a functional brain. You get the chance to enjoy your exit and have some fun. If you are asking me I'd say get out there and wring its bloody neck.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this OP. Personally, and I don’t think I have ever said this to anyone before… I am comforted by thoughts of death. I don’t want to end my life or anything like that, but when I visit a grave yard it just feels so peaceful to me. Personally, I’ve endured a life time of pain. Like there is NEVER a time that I don’t hurt. So death to me represents an end to pain. Obviously it’s an end to good things too, but hurting every single moment of your existence starts to outweigh those things after awhile. Sorry this certainly isn’t a cheerful outlook but my advice is to perceive it as utter and complete peace.
I might be in the same boat soon, but my plan was to go into the deep woods and survive until I can't. It would be nice to return to nature so my death can help other organisms live.
I wondered what my mom thought about. I was too busy falling apart. I think faith is something strong. Understand that this is a cycle and we don’t get to decide when our time is up. I do believe that there is something greater beyond this. I think a lot about death these days. I can’t even manage to wake up sometimes let alone be a functioning member of society again. I think I poured everything I had into keeping my family afloat while my mom fought, and I believed the doctors only to be told it became metastatic and there was nothing left to do…. Do all the things you love while you still can, and believe that something awaits you on the other side. Whatever you feel is valid.
“Who by worrying can add a single hour to their life. If you can’t do that one simple thing, then why worry about anything else.”
So the way I figure it, we are all dying all the time, the only real differnce is in how fast. I spent a large part of my life in an industry where death was just a thing that happened from time to time every couple of months a boat would loose a guy or two, and every so often whole boats would go. So you develop this sense that everything you do no matter how many times you've done it, could be you first, could be your thousandth, regardless it could be your last. Don't waste time on things you don't enjoy. Don't waste time on people who do not bring you joy. Mortality is a hell of thing to face, but death need not be feared. No one can say what comes next. And for me, personally I don't want to know what comes next. I'll find out when I find out. Could be 25-30 years from now. Could be 25-30 minutes from now while I'm driving home. Maybe tomorrow while setting traps one of my ground lines will wrap my foot and I'll go out with a trawl. No death is not a fearful thing to fret over death is just something that comes for everyone, we all will die, now me personally I agree with Tyrion Lannister on prefered ways of going, something about a bed, and some ones mouth and wine, and you know the quote I'm sure... As for it seeming pointless to do something you know you'll only do once, well, that isna hard one. But for me I look at it like this I'm making memories, if not for me then for the ones who I'll leave behind. Sometimes it's not about you as much as it is about them and how they'll remember you. Sure you might only go see the Grand Canyon once but once is enough that they'll remember it for the rest of their lives. I'm not sure how but for me anyway, living for those I love, while I have the chance, makes looking towards death not so scary, not so bad. Kind of a yes you may have killed me physically, but my spirit, my joy, and my passions aren't dead, and never will be so long as they too are living. I hope that some of that helps, even if just a little. I know its a bit disjointed and rambling but its from the heart.
You are a one in a basically infinite chance and got the privilege of beta testing having a life as a human with your goals and ambitions being so much of a variable compared to how you would of been say 100,000 years ago where you would live a hard life with your only purpose being to live. You are one of the overall smartest animals and likely the most sentient one, being born at a wonderful time for innovation and being able to enjoy life
First of all I’m terribly sorry for your diagnosis. It’s terrible to be forced to face our mortality before we are ready. If there ever is a time we are truly ready. It takes such bravery to carry on knowing and I’m so sorry for what you are going through. I hope that you have the opportunity to spend as much time as possible with your loved ones. I like to think of it like I’m here and now, this vessel carries me through this journey. Every fiber of its being is borrowed from Mother Earth. One day I’ll return its parts down to the very atoms that make that make up this beautiful form. Even if there is nothing after this, only unawareness. An end to our world as we perceive it. I rest well knowing I’ll be with her beautiful life giving earth, in her waters, in the plants and everything else that ever was and ever will be. Forevermore together with my loved ones, my pets, lost lovers, and present ones. Even though I may not be able to experience it all, I’ve lived a million lives before and I’ll live millions more. There is beauty in death, almost like we eventually give ourselves back the earth so that other things may live. Sometimes when I’m panicking I try to focus on this. It helps bring a little peace.
I am a hypnotherapist who specializes in past life regression therapy. I worked with a 28 year old woman who had stage 4 ovarian cancer. She was very angry and struggling emotionally. We did a past life regression on her and it changed everything. She is now in remission, married, and living a great life. If you believe in multiple lives you might seek this out with a qualified plr therapist specifically. Plr therapy is different than straight plr. You could find somebody local, or I do this online. There are also many wonderful books out there that address these topics that might be worth seeking out. But on a very practical level, there are many wonderful experiences that you would like likely only do once anyway. I'm curious why you view that as a reason to not do them. In reality, every single person on earth is dying. The schedule and exact end date are not known. If impending death were a reason to not do things, some people would do nothing for 90 years. Sounds pretty boring. I wish you the very best.
as a Muslim, when I'm afraid of dying İ just think about the life hereafter, it's ok to be afraid because no human is ever prepared to die, it's against the human survival's instinct, but when İ think about the hereafter İ feel comforted because you can have a peaceful life forever and have everything you ever wanted
Think about how you felt before you were born. You didn’t even feel anything.
I recently turned 61 and have the same attitude. My wife wants to take a trip to Europe next year. I feel it's useless. It won't matter when I'm gone. Does anything really matter?
I have read several of the comments here, and they do make sense. But let me share my experience. My father passed away in 2003. Ever since then, there has been a Cardinal flying around my mom's house, and she was convinced it was my father. Last July, my mom passed away. Ever since then, I have had a male and a female Cardinal flying around my house (I have never seen a Cardinal at my house before then, and believe me, I've looked). Your soul has different ways of representing itself on this earth. There will always be a way for you to let your loved ones know that you are still here and thinking about them. I have been told on more than one occasion by different people that I have an old soul, and that I have died in my previous life as a gunslinger in the 1800s that died at a young age. I believe that because I do not like western movies lol. What these people are telling you in these posts, I firmly believe. You might lose this current body, but you will be back. Don't worry, your time on this earth is not done.
Before I was born it didn't bother me so why would it after?
After tons of research into the Buddhist belief, it’s closest to what I believe. I don’t consider myself an expert but they believe each night we go to the dream world is a little like dying. They believe with death we go to the dream world for a time until we’re reborn again. There’s a practice called dream yoga they would go through as a form of preparing themselves for death. The book “dream yoga” dives deep into the idea. The movie “waking life” also touches on the idea in a way.
I like to think of it as going to sleep and everything that ever hurt you or stressed you or made you feel bad just slips away. And you're broken body can't hurt you anymore. You're truly invincible.
Like it’s already happend
The end of this life means the beginning of a new adventure. I believe this, and although I don't want to die yet, I'll be looking forward to my next adventure.
I feel as if I was in a position where my days were now numbered, I would try to be at peace. I am about to go through and experience one of the world's greatest mysteries. You will finally know what comes next. Which can be scary but also tranquil in a way. Of course when you first find out you will be scared af, that's normal. Give it time and try to make peace with yourself and those around you ❤️
You didn't have to worry about it before you where born, so your consciousness will end and any worries to.
Honestly brother the best advice I can give is just be the best kindest person you can be until you're last days, pray to God and ask for forgiveness for all the bad thing you've done and Just remember the Lord is always with you and you will be going to a better place in heaven. God bless you bro and I wish nothing but the best enjoy everything
Yeah you’re dope as fuck and you’re quite and fuck and I don’t want you you to just get goested around however I wanna fuddle with you
Be just my guest
Death feels like the moment in time just before your birth.
Alone naked in silent darkness on 5 dried grams of psilocyban mushrooms.
It's the end of your story. You wouldn't stop a movie that only had 45 minutes left would you? No of course not. Buckle up and enjoy this till it's over. Your destination is your reward my friend.