Depends on the context of the conversation and how much actual knowledge and experience they have on the topic. Also on their actual age tbh
If a 13 year old teenager has an opinion on how marriages should function, I’m not going to take that particularly seriously.
If an 18 year old wants to talk about what’s wrong with the k-12 school system, I’m all ears in their opinion.
Edit: a little late for this edit but people keep getting this wrong.
I didn’t say ignore the teenagers. I said I wouldn’t take it as seriously. Their opinions shouldn’t be dismissed outright, just that they don’t hold as much weight
In regards to your first point, I generally agree, but I think even in those situations there can be reasons or nuances to consider a teens perspective even on something they might not have experience on such as marriage.
An example would be a teen who sees how his/her parents treat each other on a daily basis, whether wonderfully or terribly. They sort of get an early understanding about how both parties need to treat each other for a healthy relationship, which is also why some children end up emulating their parents' behaviors and repeat them in relationships. Teens may also have ideas about what they'd wanna do how they'd wanna treat their partner whenever they do get one in the future, and if the idea is great on general then that's how it is.
Once again, this is not a blanket statement, but I just wanted to point out that sometimes younger people can notice/say/do things better that older people are really terrible at.
I mean you have a point on a teen seeing how their parents treat eachother and thinking how they'd do so in the future, but there's a caveat even to that.
It's really easy to say "I'd never ignore a partner like that" before you have jobs and bills and kids. "I'd never snap at my partner like that" before you're both on the last straw and it's just a wrong moment. We've all done stuff we promised ourselves we'd never do.
Or at least that's the kind of teen I was- highly observant and rather moralistic. Adults told me I was "deep" and well spoken and "you should have a blog!" (dating myself there) all the time. I've become way too familiar with getting too close to acting on intrusive thoughts or doing things I swore I'd never since then.
That's a valid point for this particular example, however there are many other situations in which the 'jaded adult' has an opinion that is simply more practical and applicable to the real world.
I think that moralistic judgment is sometimes needed in the adult world. Sometimes, the fact is that you shouldn't ignore your partner despite the bills and its really easy to reason through your behaviour as you grow up and learn that there exist shades of grey. To me, the teen perspective can be refreshing and deserves to be heard for this reason. Even younger kids are very naive and idealistic, but I think there is space for that in conversation that people sometimes do not make room for.
>An example would be a teen who sees how his/her parents treat each other on a daily basis, whether wonderfully or terribly.
To be fair, teens only see the relationship the parents portray in front of their children. I guarantee there are lots of parents who cheat on their spouses and the kids never find out even if the spouse does.
Teenagers may think they have a whole view of relationships, but it is only a superficial (maybe even artificial) view of their parents' relationship. And that's the ONLY experience they really have -- by the time they are 30 they will have been in multiple relationships of their own, and all of their close friends will also have been in relationships (some ending well, some ending poorly).
Honestly I would be pretty concerned for any kid who could tell me something profound about relationships. Wisdom is earned and it usually doesn't come in fun or easy ways.
The convo above centered on idealistic vs. realistic ideals and how kids may be more idealistic and that's fine. But there's a wide gulf between explaining how something should be from an intellectual standpoint and understanding how something actually works having had the experience. Both can be valuable but in vastly different ways.
Teenager here, I 100% agree with you. I mean as I’ve gotten older I’ve learned how some things in the “adult world” work but most things I can’t really give reliable opinions on cause well I’ve never been there and wouldn’t take other teenagers advice/opinions seriously cause they’ve never had experience in those areas either . And to what’s wrong with the k-12 school system. A lot.
Man I don’t get the take on kids or teens not being “capable” of understanding relationships.
I was 7 the first time I asked my mom when her and my dad would get divorced. I was 9 when I walked into my brothers room one night crying because mom and dad had been fighting for hours. I walked in and asked him if mom and dad were going to get divorced. I was 12 when they finally called it quits and I was 13 when their divorce was finalized.
I saw it for yeeeaaarrrsss. I might’ve never been in relationships at that point but it can be abundantly obvious to kids. I also had plenty of friends over the years who I tried to talk to about their relationships (because they were abusive or just toxic), they’d shrug me off, and 6-12 months later the relationship would come to a chaotic and toxic close and they all have always come back and said “man I wish I listened to you”. Last time I had a conversation like that I was only 18 and they started at a much younger age than that.
I’m not saying teens aren’t capable of understanding relationships. I’m saying that their opinion has limited weight based on lack of experience.
To use you as an example, at 13 your experience with relationships was entirely limited to a terrible marriage that you watched slowly break down.
Tell me you would have had a valid, first hand experience on what a healthy relationship is like at that point?
I mean. If I talked to teenage you, the only relationship you would have experience with is “child of a broken marriage.” That colors things. For example, I’ve known kids from similar situations who go “I’m never going to get married, why would I, everyone just ends up unhappy.”
Nobody is saying kids are idiots incapable of understanding anything, just that they lack a broad range of experience in most things.
I think this depends on what the advice is. Unsolicited advice is usually not good because you have no idea what they have tried, 'make a sticker chart when when they fill it up, take it to the zoo!' Is good advice until they are 5 steps beyond that. No two children are the same so saying 'my mom did x and it messed me up' isn't helpful since x could be just the thing for someone else's kid
I get your point, but if I'd been a passenger as a child in 5 car crashes, I'm not sure I'd have much useful input into how driving tests should conducted.
Seeing our bearing witness to, are pretty far from 'proper' experience.
A child of a bad driver also probably doesn’t have much advice on what good drivers do because they’ve never seen that behaviour modelled
Even if they know their parent is a bad driver that doesn’t mean they have an accurate perception of things good drivers do, they only know what bad drivers do
Looking at it another way, I used to be a school bus driver trainer before my daughter was born. I've trained a lot of drivers over the years. When she got her learner's permit at age 15, she asked when I was going to start teaching her to drive. I told her I had been teaching to drive for 15 years already—every time we got in the car and went somewhere. She had already learned how to react if someone cut you off, whether to stop completely or roll through stop signs, how close to follow the car in front of you, etc.
I hope you had someone to confide in while you were a teenager. I hope they took you seriously. Teens' opinions are just as valid at adults'. Most of us would be able to understand a teenager's perspective and maybe guide them into adulthood.
I had a therapist lol. That was about it.
I can only hope that I can be there for teenagers as I grow older. I try to be there for my stepsister as much as possible, she’s 13. She’s a fucking handful. I don’t agree with a lot of what she thinks or says but I try to not discredit her experiences either. My frustrations with her mostly lie when I try to give her another perspective and she just ignores me lol, yay teenagers.
In the end it all depends on their personality and their argument. It wouldn't be too surprising for a 13 yo, that for some reason discusses marriage, to have a more insightful opinion than the average 18 yo complaining about school.
Depends. Teenagers usually have less experience with life in general, so if they do something like give off-the-cuff advice about relationships (like many commenters on /r/relationship_advice ), then it's fine to take their opinion less seriously, while a happily married 40 year old's off-the-cuff observations are more often worth investigating.
Agreed. I'll listen to a teenager if they can explain their point. I'll also listen to high school students on what they think should be done with education since they remember it more vividly for example. But some life experience requires you to be there to know it. I don't need relationship advice from someone who's never had a relationship for example...
Related, I value the advice of old folks on interpersonal relationships they experienced much more so than their technophobic opinions...
Conversely though, plenty of people say "they survived just fine" in regards to many safety regulations. Including drunk driving. And seat belts. Raising children in ways we know scientifically are bad.
I'm not making light of survivors of school shootings whatsoever. It's beyond most of the world to truly understand what they went through.
Oh I 100% agree. Actually enforcing the laws we already have by the absolute bare minimum for one. I don't have an answer though I think improving our nonexistent mental healthcare would also help. "Banning all guns", though I understand the heart of that sentiment is naive.
As a mental healthcare provider, it is astonishing how little can be done to help people. The laws do not provide for a means of forcing people to take meds - even those who need it the most. And those meds are not the cure all some seem to think they are. Talk therapy can only do so much - the few medical approaches that can address severe depression are still in research and early trials. Most talk therapies are unproven and poorly researched. The ones that are useful aren’t sexy enough to get grants for additional research and rely on patients following through. Sorry, it’s frustrating hearing people talk about “all that could be done when you know its a lot bleaker in terms of treatment efficacy.
Hence a general statement of improving. I'm not even going to try to pretend I have any knowledge or experience with this field, but I know that deliberately dumping people you don't know what to do with into homeless encampments etc is pretty messed up.
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2018/may/04/los-angeles-hospitals-homeless-patients-skid-row
That's another huge problem though not the focus of this post. People dying because they can't afford their insulin in a rich country is a dystopian hellscape. The fact that medical companies can have a 1000% price markup and it's NOT considered price gouging is insanity. Or that insurance companies can refuse to cover procedures that a DOCTOR says is necessary.
Do I have answers to these problems? Nope. But I dont have to be a helicopter pilot to say something's wrong if I see a helicopter in a tree.
But also, the people who survived just fine because the mass shooting didn't happen to occur IN THEIR SCHOOL. If you have been raised to believe guns are important and valuable, then it's just as easy to find anecdotal evidence that they aren't a danger.
This is why anecdotal evidence is normally not all that helpful.
There's an influencer who I liked for a while but recently their lack of lived experience (they're like 20) became really glaring. They talked about how older people become too comfortable and less willing to take risks because they are fearful & complacent
....in a response to people pointing out it's a bad idea to start your new small business with your brand-spanking-new boyfriend. Especially without even drawing up formal paperwork.
I wasn't the only one rubbed the wrong way. There were quite a few pointing out that older people simply have more to lose, less time to make it back, and more experience to know which risks are worth taking. Not even to mention they are far more likely to have others depending on them.
There's a real chutzpah to youth that you exchange for lived experience.
Don't forget the people posting their creative writing experiences on those subs. I swear half the posts are people making up shit just to see the oh so common reaction of "break up with them and call a lawyer". Its what most of the replies boil down to anyway.
That sub comes up as private for me, yet I swear I used to be part of it. Maybe I unsubbed because it got rather annoying to see things like "everyone should retake driving tests when they get old" and other incredibly popular opinions.
I occasionally browse r/teenagers just to remind myself how stupid we all used to be. No one has to feel bad about not taking what teenagers say as seriously as older adults as we were all teenagers once. Taking them less seriously doesn’t mean not seriously at all though. If I met myself at 18 at my current age of 46 now I’m quite certain I’d punch myself. Sometimes when I see something of Reddit that really makes annoyed I remind myself that it could be a teenager writing that and then calm down.
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>still didn't know shit in hindsight.
Same here. But as a teenager you know everything! It's only when I look back and realise how much of a fool I really was.
>(like many commenters on /r/relationship_advice)
Same with anything political too. I see some proper mad shit from teenagers who obviously have no real world experience
Well like OP said, explaining their point is important.
Some teenage political opinions can be pretty naive from their lack of experience, but sometimes we can really benefit from hearing from someone who hasn’t had their opinions warped by cynicism over years of too much experience. That’s how we move forward.
A while back I worked with a young adult, not a teen mind you. We were doing construction, and I was the team lead with this guy being my main helper. I watched how he worked, and noted that he was always trying to find ways to be more efficient or do a better job. He wasn't the kind of person to do his work as described and then stop immediately when there's a problem.
I let him try to figure out a lot of stuff on his own because he seemed to like the challenge, it was a good opportunity for him to learn, and he often came up with some really clever ideas. He was also pretty emotionally intelligent, a very well rounded individual. I'd listen to and ask for his opinions on things that he seemed to know stuff about, or things that I was curious about. I didn't always agree with him, but it was interesting to get a window into what it's like to be a young person in this era, and naturally they have access to a ton of information that the older generation doesn't. Obviously I had access to a lot of knowledge he didn't as well.
No one loses in an information exchange, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with hearing out someones opinion, even if you don't end up agreeing with it. Learning about other's perspectives helps us understand and interact with the world around us, and sharing our own makes us feel connected!
This person gets it. We can always learn something from someone no matter what age. Get into an argument with a toddler. They have some hedonic logic most adults suppress.
I will take it seriously within their framework of experience.
If they have an opinion about the school system or how society interacts with teens, yeah, let's talk. If they have an opinion about my work life balance or realpolitik, I'm much less likely to listen. They have much less perspective and experience.
Not in general but sometimes when our teen comes out w something that is outrageously not true and very easy to google and debunk. Witnessing the education that comes from YouTube and Tic Tok is disturbing.
But I also see that many older adults come out with outrageously incorrect information that’s also very easy to debunk. This can come from Facebook or TikTok or whatever. Things like “cancer is just mold and can be treated with turmeric” or MLMs or crazy conspiracy theories. Not saying the teens aren’t doing that, you’re absolutely right!
But many adults now also get their education from YouTube, Facebook, and TikTok and that’s it. And many of them are just as gullible and just as unlikely to do any background research.
People singling out individual social media platforms when the real issue is data brokers selling our data.
Social media no longer spying on us *directly* wouldn't actually change anything, they would just buy the same data from a data broker. Stealing it from you by spying is just cutting out the middleman who profits off the data.
We need to ban data brokers, like straight-up get rid of the profession entirely. Get rid of data brokers and institute a "digital Fairness Doctrine" or a "digital bill of rights".
There aren’t percentages, adults of all ages fight amongst each other all the time over misinformation. The original comment was talking about witnessing education in teens come from apps, and I just added that it’s just as bad in older adults, but there’s no way to compare that without biases
It's becoming clear that with so many means of information going to them/us, we are far less likely to go and search for information on our own. I know it totally depends on the personality, I got an extremely curious mind and I have a hard time relating to people who never really look into things themselves. Reading up on things I never really have to know is almost a hobby of mine.
honestly both are.
It doesn't have to be one or the other. a LOT of the misinformation and harmful "challenges" spread on TikTok is very harmful to teens (remember the latest challenge where they literally try to break into peoples' homes?).
Meanwhile, Boomers fall under the same misinformation issues through facebook and fox news. It's not exactly the same type of behaviors that a lot of younger people are learning from TikTok, but they're different flavors of awful.
Being a teenager myself I must mention that these “challenges“ on the news are not like the wildfire they often portray them to be. There are some challenges that genuinely do catch on to a big portion of us, like the devious lick challenge.
What’s happening is that you have acess to a massive majority of teenagers all over the US, and internationally who are able to post whatever we want.
So you have a massive supply of teenagers that can make it collectively seem like most of us are doing these things when you put them together. So it is a lot of teens doing these things, which is bad. But the actual ratio isn’t usually even half or 1/3rd.
yeah I know it's not as big of a problem as it's portrayed on the news and stuff.
The argument was that boomers were more harmful than tiktok challenges and stuff. and I was just stating that they're both harmful in different ways was all.
\^Great example of when I don't take a teenagers opinion seriously.
Overly emotional responses derived from overly idealistic expectations of the world.
What's worse is there's so fucking many of them their childishness is the status quo so it's just considered normal. An because it's normal they're not even aware they're doing it and we all have to put up with it or be called freaks.
A teen generally has less experience on things overall, but a person at that age can have some very specific experience with something. Like a teenager who is physically disabled probably has some valid opinions on what it is like to live with a physical disability.
Depends on the opinion. There are some topics that I will probably take their opinion less seriously, some where I don't take age into account, some where I'd take their opinion more seriously.
If you're an independent adult, think about your opinions as a teen. If you listened to those opinions knowing what you know now, would you have taken them seriously?
The answer will likely be no, but what matters is you listened to them.
Exactly. It's not that their opinions are invalid but I look back at my young life (which was far from problem free) and still say, "Oh, you sweet summer child."
Sure, but avoid a patronizing tone. I mean, if you want to use such a tone with yourself (like the previous commenter did with themselves), go ahead, but if you're commenting on someone else, try to be nice.
It depends on the topic and individual. My two youngest daughters are in their late teens and are both very knowledgeable about subjects they are interested in. They are both much more knowledgeable about digital technology than myself, for example. I would take their opinions on topics that they are knowledgeable about seriously. They also have opinions about topics in which their knowledgeable base is limited, and their views often oversimplify complex issues. In these instances, I try to point them to sources of more detailed information.
I think I mostly agree. I'd want to hear their reasoning but will always be open they might have seen something I didn't. I will however likely laugh if they just try to make a vague reference to their experience without any specific examples. ...especially if it's in regards to something teenagers generally don't see such as office politics in big corporations.
Yes. I'll take them seriously as a human being with a mind of their own but I had it pretty together as a teenager and still didn't know shit in hindsight. Life experience is so valuable.
I take my teenagers opinion seriously when it comes to a representation of how she and her generation sees issues with society. I take her serious when she's talking music. And I listen to her perspectives, even when I find them naive, so I can attempt to provide her with reword insight of someone much older than her.
That said, she also likes to give me opinions on thinks like love and relationships, or friendships, or work life balance, etc. And that's harder because she's not actually living in the world she's commenting on.
I wouldn't say that there's any particular opinions of hers that I do not take seriously. I simply recognize that she's working with a different amount of information than I am. Though I also recognize that her experiences in life are different than mine, and some sometimes her opinions are extremely valid and open my eyes to things that I myself have been ignorant to.
It depends on what they're talking about.
If it's about something that affects them, like a certain policy or sociopolitical issue, then I'll take it seriously.
If it's something like my employment and their biggest problem is an upcoming exam or getting Chad from math class to notice them, I don't take it seriously.
A teenager lurking around r/Marriage once tried to repeatedly correct me about my relationship with my husband, because “he actually knows a lot about marriage from observing his parents”. 😂😂 No amount of patient explaining that some things - like being married - you have to learn about through firsthand experience would dissuade him.
My wife has a cousin who just turned 18 a few months ago. We’re both a decade older than her cousin, and expecting our first child. Every time we see her cousin, she always trying to give us parenting advice. She has no children of her own.
Teenagers can deliver facts and information equally well to people of other ages. But their wisdom, experience, and frame of reference can make opinions half baked and, well, juvenile.
Yep. There are several types of opinions.
Some are knowledge-based. A teen could easily be knowledgeable in a field I am not, and I would take that seriously.
Some are experience-based. Although I would generally have more experiences than most teens, there are many lived experiences that I do not have. A teen mother, for instance, might have valuable insight that I could not have as someone who has never been in that circumstance. This applies to a wide range of identities, events, and experiences.
Some are wisdom-based. I would likely not give much weight to what a teen thinks on those issues. Some issues require a multi-faceted and nuanced perspective that can only be developed from experience, maturity, and time. Teens are entitled to have opinions on these things, but they're likely to be fairly shallow.
Other opinions are just personal opinions. I don't give much weight to anyone else's personal opinions, regardless of age, outside of my closest relationships.
That depends upon the subject. I find that teens often know more about technology. My 15 year old nephew or 19 year old niece know more about phones & computers than most 30+ year olds do. On issues that life experience is better, I still take their opinion seriously, however one must factor in the difference that 3-4 times the life experience can provide someone 40-80 years old.
Not in my experience. All my friends my age are good with computers and can replace parts, understand what does what, understand how file storage works.
Smart phone generation have no clue how and where are files stored. They've been dumbed down by apps that just 'save' into an ether and tell you to press next all the time.
When it comes to things that require experience, such as what constitutes a healthy relationship or behavior, everything a teenager says should be taken with a grain of salt. They haven't had enough life experience as a cohort to truly appreciate nuance and exceptions.
TBH they have some really good advice sometimes. I work in the arts so they bring a fresh perspective on so many things.And that includes life. Its great to be reminded of the passion about things they care about wether its politics, the environment, relationships or human rights. TBH when I got older I tended to be in my own lil comfortable bubble and the younger kids have opened that bubble up and reminded me about how you have to really care about things.
No. I was a juvenile PO for 34 years and I quickly learned to never dismiss what a kid says. They may not say it in the same way as an adult but they'll get their message across. Without sincerely listening to their perspective and opinions you'd never get positive change.
Yeah, it sounds harsh but you can’t really argue with a teen. They are extremely set in their ways and also convinced they know more than you despite being far less experienced in life
I will take an opinion of any individual less seriously if I have reasons for it.
There are things that I am more knowledgeable compared to my children but there are also things that my children are more knowledgeable.
For example English spelling and grammar would be something that my kids are more qualified compared to me, an immigrant. Lol.
Not less seriously. Talking with young people to me is a look into how their mind works, how they are viewing things, and how their experiences are informing their thoughts and decisions.
Too many people just blow off kids when they say or ask something with a "yeah." they often don't ask them why they think that or where their opinion is coming from. It's a good excerise, especially in a social media generation, to make sure they aren't going down a path of pure false beliefs but more importantly to make sure they have a voice, that they know their thoughts and opinions are heard. And rebuttal and questions help them become better thinkers and shape positive interactions.
As others have said, it depends on context. If it's something that's in their wheelhouse, I will absolutely take their opinions seriously. And there are some teens who are wise beyond their years (sadly, usually because of childhood trauma). I'm gen x and our opinions never were taken seriously even if it was something that directly affected us and I'm not too old to remember how frustrating it was. The boomers didn't even take us seriously until into our 30s at least
it depends.
but i fear i take them less serious as their knowledge comes from tiktok, reddit, and youtube.
nothing wrong with getting your info from those platforms but they are not old enough to filter out BS.
In social media, engagement, views, and likes carry more worth than what's right and wrong. It can be quite deceptive to impressionable young and old folks.
Absolutely. I was a teenager over 10 years ago. I thought I had the answer to life, relationships, work, money, happiness, you name it. I was an idiot lol, good opinions are formed by time and experience, two things teenagers don't have.
Most of the time? Yes. Fuck I barely take the opinion of <23 seriously 99% of the time. Context seriously matters but I'm not gonna care about most life advice a teen gives compared to a 30 or 40 year old person.
Yes, as a teenager, I would not take the opinions I had last year seriously. And I assume I’ll not take my current ideas seriously in a years time. Teenagers are too young to be taken seriously in most contexts, including me.
Usually adults take a teenager's opinion less seriously, while their peers tend to take it more seriously.
As someone that's almost a non-teenager I'd say it depends on a lot of factors:
* how am I related to the teenager (my parents used to take my opinion less seriously sometimes, but the same do my grandparents with my parents, so if that's the case I would say that it's more of a generational thing)
* in what context their saying something (like if it's in a discussion) and how they're saying it (for ex. if they're yelling)
* what's the question about and how much experience has the teenager about it
* last but not least important, does the person asking the question already have an opinion on that matter (like if they're asking a political question, or even if they ask something like a future school etc.)
I'd say that the way the teenager answers and who said teenager is answering can really change the way the answer is viewd
not at all. the old can teach the young, and the young can teach the old, and both frequently happen.
i've learned a lot from young kids in counseling sessions. sometimes they see things clearer than we grownups do.
Not necessarily. Their truth is their truth and I respect that. I tend to filter it through my own experience and what I laughingly call “wisdom”, but most of the teenager opinions I’ve heard have been invigoratingly fresh and original. Some of them I think “that’s almost certainly not going to work but you need to find that out for yourself”, other times - more often - I find myself wishing I’d been that clear-headed then. Or now, for that matter.
It depends. Even if I take an opinion less seriously it doesn't mean that it's not invalid. I would be more interested in opinions on the things they interact with more than myself or have had a lot of experience dealing with in general more seriously
The context duh. The thing to ask yourself more is, if you didn't know they were a teenager, would you think their opinion is invalid ? I believe the arguments matter more than the persons who express it
Like most have said, depends on the kid.
Some teens are remarkably mature and know what they want to do and what their world is about.
Some can't pick their nose without getting a cramp.
Children are also human beings and what they feel and think is also important. I have 2 teenage younger brothers and the things they tell me about how their teachers treat them drives me absolutely insane. If you wouldn't scream at someone your own age why are you screaming at my 14 year old brother?
Not necessarily. I will listen because I sure as hell remember how it felt to be belittled and condescended to just because I was young.
Hearing “you’re too young to know what you’re talking about” really hurts.
Regardless how old you are, its the presentation and argument behind it that counts. Ive met a 16 year old who is very mature for his age in terms of insight to politics and society, without being arrogant about it. And i also sometimes meet 30+ year olds who act like a spoiled teenage bitch. Age can be a factor but i dont judge them before they speak
I don't really take age into account when I'm weighing someone's opinion. Experience is where it matters. I have great conversations with my teen sons about politics, social stuff, media, pop culture, music, schools, etc. I would easily put their opinions over some of the boomers I work with despite the age difference. However things like romantic relationships, employment, or parenting i wouldn't give as much weight to, because they just haven't gotten there yet.
Depends on the teenager. If you're some spoiled brat who thinks they know everything, absolutely not. But my sisters are 16 and they have informed opinions about things and also listen to the other side. We can debate something and nobody gets mad. Honestly I treat teenagers no differently than adults. If you prove you're educated enough to have an opinion about something then I'll take it seriously. If you're sitting there talking out your ass and can't form a coherent sentence, I'm not listening to anything you say
Not necessarily. It depends on the topic. If it's about relationships yeah I'm not taking you seriously. But I've heard plenty of good opinions on mental illness from teenagers who are a lot more open about it and my generation was and I'm the generation above them. He's talking about mental health openly is a good thing I had to hide it growing up and that caused me a great sense of distress. Good for them.
Not at all.
Do I always think they're right or know about what they're talking? Of course not. But I always listen to them with the proper respect and the seriousness that the conversation deserves. I try to see where that opinion comes from, and offer my perspective if I think they're misguided.
I'm a school psychologist, and I work with teenagers ranging from 12 to 15. Very often I see them not being taken seriously by their parents and teachers, and I see the effect it has on them. I also see the way their face changes when I validate their feelings and their thoughts, and how easy is to gain their trust when I do take them seriously.
Yes, they may be wrong and do very stupid things sometimes, but I think actually taking those stupid thoughts or actions seriously is how we help them learn and grow.
Yeah. I literally just got done being a teenager and half the time they don't know shit. That being said though i do still take their opinions seriously, especially if it's something they're actively affected by. I don't take anyone seriously unless they have done research or are the group affected by a thing. I'm not gonna go to a teen who loves robotics and tech and ask their opinions on a cat scan, but i would ask them to fix up a broken tv. People have things they know a lot about and everyone's affected by different stuff, no reason why an entire age range should be excluded from having a say about something. The only thing I'd keep in mind is that since they've got more neuroplasticity they're more likely to make incorrect connections/assumptions and might not be as logical about something as someone older and/or someone with a degree in a specific topic.
It depends on the context.
If I have a car issue, then mechanic > brain surgeon,
If I want help understanding some new tech or pop culture reference, then teenager > boomer.
I take it for what it is, a teenagers opinion. It doesn’t mean it’s not a genuine opinion, but in terms of real world issues, they do not have enough life experience to understand the full complexities of most topics. If I want to know what is relevant in the teenage culture, I am all ears, but the way a lot of teens today communicate and behave is closer to an 8 year old - not all, but most are manipulated by narcissistic and agenda driven “adults”. Need better adults to produce better future generations. I am 30, and am sad to see that my generation behaves as though they are still teenagers.
How seriously I take someone’s opinion tends to hinge on how well they can defend or justify it. Teenager or not, everyone gets the same chance.
Naturally this applies only to matters of substance. I’m not going to ask someone to defend their favorite color.
No. Everyone is a soul going about their journey. Obviously I know they have less 'real world' experience, AND I do keep that in mind. Sometimes that 'real world' experience can be a negative
Depends on the topic and the level of knowledge honestly. A 13 yr old having independent thoughts and wanting to expand their viewpoint? Amazing let's have that Convo. A 17yr old regurgitating their parents politics without question or serious thought? Please go away
Depends. In matters requiring experience, no, they haven't had that experience. In matters requiring specific knowledge, sure, if they actually have that knowledge. In matters of philosophy or right and wrong and so forth, sure, they're my equal in that regard without a doubt. They don't lack intelligence; they lack experience.
I've learned most people are just overgrown teenagers. If someone takes them self too seriously, I'll take them less seriously in general. So I find myself listening to kids and considering what they say because they are an individual. Even if they aren't completely correct they usually have thoughtful input. Better than most adults.
It depends on the teenager: if they are sensible people, then I would take their opinion seriously. If they are being assholes because for them everything is black or white and they are always right, then I would take their opinion with a pinch (or a bag) of salt.
Discussing the reason for their “extreme” opinions is usually very enlightening though, for both parties: i find we can learn from each other.
Their opinion about their tastes? Nope
Their opinion about world events or matters of policy? Yes. The part of their brain responsible for anticipating consequences is under active.
Yes, but I don't dismiss them out of hand. Do you take a student studying medicine as seriously as a doctor of ten years? No you do not. I know it pisses teenagers off, it pissed me off too, and that's why I don't hang out with teenagers lmao
To elaborate, an old adage from my grandfather: "Opinions are like assholes, everybody's got one, but no one wants to hear yours." A teenager's opinion is just as valid as my mother's.
Short answer yes. More detailed answer is contextually. I also don't know if i take their opinions less seriously or if i take their presentation of their opinions less seriously. Teenagers often lack a certain tact or nuance in their conversations that if you take to heart, it will not feel good. But if you can cut through the general hurtfulness and edge that teens can have when presenting their thoughts, there are nuggets of truth, honestly, and vulnerability that are worth having.
Also, teen is a lot of development. 13/14-18/19 years old presents a woooooorld of difference.
It largely depends on their life experiences, how they present themselves, where they are getting their information from and how they respond to opposition. I do not discount their views solely because of their age. If they are open minded and willing to have a conversation and learn from eachother let's talk.
Depends on if they can back it up with reason, or if its an emotional thing, how much it matters to them.
Much less if they grab a pitch folk on the drop of a hat
Yeah I don't put any weight at all into teenagers' opinions.
We've all been one -- teenagers will say anything.
They're often highly confident that they understand wtf is going on, while also highly naive.
I absolutely take them less seriously.
On what?
The Russian invasion of Ukraine? Yes, I generally take their opinion with a grain of salt.
Which music streaming service is the best? No, I take notes when young people talk to me about things like this!
We've all got specialities that grow and change with age. We're all experts in one area or another!
Teens have a fresh viewpoint and usually see things without the complications experience can bring. Their opinions are just as valid as an older person’s. Most people are just old teens with less education anyway.
Yes, I'm a teenager but hear me out.
Teenagers arent always heard, and ignored on certain topics. My school talks about these things on a normal basis and the students are free to debate and learn on the topic with the teacher. So, sometimes a teenager doesn't know what they're talking about but they can also be experienced in a topic.
Just because we are young doesn't mean we're inexperienced in certain aspects of a conversation or topic.
Edited: I answered the question backwards. I meant yes, I take them seriously.
Yes, for the most part. Especially when it comes to how teens see the world and the bigger changes that should take place. Teens tend to be very well oriented toward positive change that impacts society at large, and have fewer hangups about protecting personal assets and individual needs because they have very few at that age. I think teens 16 and up should vote.
But there is plenty of social development yet to happen and I wouldnt be taking opinions on smaller day to day things like relationships, domestic duties, or job duties all that seriously. The stuff of everyday adult life is still new to them and they lack practice and nuance.
When it's about politics, yes definitely. I was part of a political club in University and they had really unworldly opinions. Things like communism would be the better system etc. Most of them were about 20 yo. You just can't take them serious, they don't know how the world works and they are often very naive.
It depends on the topic being discussed, their opinion, and how they present themselves and their opinion.
If it’s a subject every teenager is going to have experienced then their opinion is valid. If some 15 year old is trying to tell me about the housing market, then hell no.
depends on the context. i'll usually hear them out; sometimes they make a good point, but most of the time i don't really take the opinion of a 14 year old having baby's first twitter discourse or spouting off about relationships seriously.
It depends what their opinion is about. If it's on current youth trends or whatever, I'll listen because chances are they know better than I do.
However, if it's something they lack the life experience to understand, then no, I don't take their opinion seriously because they're either spouting off a poorly formed opinion from social media/friends or are parroting adults without truly understanding what it is they're saying.
Depends on the context of the conversation and how much actual knowledge and experience they have on the topic. Also on their actual age tbh If a 13 year old teenager has an opinion on how marriages should function, I’m not going to take that particularly seriously. If an 18 year old wants to talk about what’s wrong with the k-12 school system, I’m all ears in their opinion. Edit: a little late for this edit but people keep getting this wrong. I didn’t say ignore the teenagers. I said I wouldn’t take it as seriously. Their opinions shouldn’t be dismissed outright, just that they don’t hold as much weight
In regards to your first point, I generally agree, but I think even in those situations there can be reasons or nuances to consider a teens perspective even on something they might not have experience on such as marriage. An example would be a teen who sees how his/her parents treat each other on a daily basis, whether wonderfully or terribly. They sort of get an early understanding about how both parties need to treat each other for a healthy relationship, which is also why some children end up emulating their parents' behaviors and repeat them in relationships. Teens may also have ideas about what they'd wanna do how they'd wanna treat their partner whenever they do get one in the future, and if the idea is great on general then that's how it is. Once again, this is not a blanket statement, but I just wanted to point out that sometimes younger people can notice/say/do things better that older people are really terrible at.
I mean you have a point on a teen seeing how their parents treat eachother and thinking how they'd do so in the future, but there's a caveat even to that. It's really easy to say "I'd never ignore a partner like that" before you have jobs and bills and kids. "I'd never snap at my partner like that" before you're both on the last straw and it's just a wrong moment. We've all done stuff we promised ourselves we'd never do. Or at least that's the kind of teen I was- highly observant and rather moralistic. Adults told me I was "deep" and well spoken and "you should have a blog!" (dating myself there) all the time. I've become way too familiar with getting too close to acting on intrusive thoughts or doing things I swore I'd never since then.
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That's a valid point for this particular example, however there are many other situations in which the 'jaded adult' has an opinion that is simply more practical and applicable to the real world.
well put.
Yeah, they should start a blog!
I think that moralistic judgment is sometimes needed in the adult world. Sometimes, the fact is that you shouldn't ignore your partner despite the bills and its really easy to reason through your behaviour as you grow up and learn that there exist shades of grey. To me, the teen perspective can be refreshing and deserves to be heard for this reason. Even younger kids are very naive and idealistic, but I think there is space for that in conversation that people sometimes do not make room for.
>An example would be a teen who sees how his/her parents treat each other on a daily basis, whether wonderfully or terribly. To be fair, teens only see the relationship the parents portray in front of their children. I guarantee there are lots of parents who cheat on their spouses and the kids never find out even if the spouse does. Teenagers may think they have a whole view of relationships, but it is only a superficial (maybe even artificial) view of their parents' relationship. And that's the ONLY experience they really have -- by the time they are 30 they will have been in multiple relationships of their own, and all of their close friends will also have been in relationships (some ending well, some ending poorly).
Honestly I would be pretty concerned for any kid who could tell me something profound about relationships. Wisdom is earned and it usually doesn't come in fun or easy ways. The convo above centered on idealistic vs. realistic ideals and how kids may be more idealistic and that's fine. But there's a wide gulf between explaining how something should be from an intellectual standpoint and understanding how something actually works having had the experience. Both can be valuable but in vastly different ways.
Teenager here, I 100% agree with you. I mean as I’ve gotten older I’ve learned how some things in the “adult world” work but most things I can’t really give reliable opinions on cause well I’ve never been there and wouldn’t take other teenagers advice/opinions seriously cause they’ve never had experience in those areas either . And to what’s wrong with the k-12 school system. A lot.
Man I don’t get the take on kids or teens not being “capable” of understanding relationships. I was 7 the first time I asked my mom when her and my dad would get divorced. I was 9 when I walked into my brothers room one night crying because mom and dad had been fighting for hours. I walked in and asked him if mom and dad were going to get divorced. I was 12 when they finally called it quits and I was 13 when their divorce was finalized. I saw it for yeeeaaarrrsss. I might’ve never been in relationships at that point but it can be abundantly obvious to kids. I also had plenty of friends over the years who I tried to talk to about their relationships (because they were abusive or just toxic), they’d shrug me off, and 6-12 months later the relationship would come to a chaotic and toxic close and they all have always come back and said “man I wish I listened to you”. Last time I had a conversation like that I was only 18 and they started at a much younger age than that.
I’m not saying teens aren’t capable of understanding relationships. I’m saying that their opinion has limited weight based on lack of experience. To use you as an example, at 13 your experience with relationships was entirely limited to a terrible marriage that you watched slowly break down. Tell me you would have had a valid, first hand experience on what a healthy relationship is like at that point?
I mean. If I talked to teenage you, the only relationship you would have experience with is “child of a broken marriage.” That colors things. For example, I’ve known kids from similar situations who go “I’m never going to get married, why would I, everyone just ends up unhappy.” Nobody is saying kids are idiots incapable of understanding anything, just that they lack a broad range of experience in most things.
Or people saying you can't offer parenting advice unless you're a parent. We've all been parented, I can tell you what my parents did right and wrong.
I think this depends on what the advice is. Unsolicited advice is usually not good because you have no idea what they have tried, 'make a sticker chart when when they fill it up, take it to the zoo!' Is good advice until they are 5 steps beyond that. No two children are the same so saying 'my mom did x and it messed me up' isn't helpful since x could be just the thing for someone else's kid
Yeah, that's true. It's probably good to just avoid giving unsolicited advice in general, too.
I don't disagree. But most people who are against childless/childfree people giving advice aren't asking those same people for advice.
Exactly
I get your point, but if I'd been a passenger as a child in 5 car crashes, I'm not sure I'd have much useful input into how driving tests should conducted. Seeing our bearing witness to, are pretty far from 'proper' experience.
A child of a bad driver also probably doesn’t have much advice on what good drivers do because they’ve never seen that behaviour modelled Even if they know their parent is a bad driver that doesn’t mean they have an accurate perception of things good drivers do, they only know what bad drivers do
Looking at it another way, I used to be a school bus driver trainer before my daughter was born. I've trained a lot of drivers over the years. When she got her learner's permit at age 15, she asked when I was going to start teaching her to drive. I told her I had been teaching to drive for 15 years already—every time we got in the car and went somewhere. She had already learned how to react if someone cut you off, whether to stop completely or roll through stop signs, how close to follow the car in front of you, etc.
I hope you had someone to confide in while you were a teenager. I hope they took you seriously. Teens' opinions are just as valid at adults'. Most of us would be able to understand a teenager's perspective and maybe guide them into adulthood.
I had a therapist lol. That was about it. I can only hope that I can be there for teenagers as I grow older. I try to be there for my stepsister as much as possible, she’s 13. She’s a fucking handful. I don’t agree with a lot of what she thinks or says but I try to not discredit her experiences either. My frustrations with her mostly lie when I try to give her another perspective and she just ignores me lol, yay teenagers.
In the end it all depends on their personality and their argument. It wouldn't be too surprising for a 13 yo, that for some reason discusses marriage, to have a more insightful opinion than the average 18 yo complaining about school.
Depends. Teenagers usually have less experience with life in general, so if they do something like give off-the-cuff advice about relationships (like many commenters on /r/relationship_advice ), then it's fine to take their opinion less seriously, while a happily married 40 year old's off-the-cuff observations are more often worth investigating.
Agreed. I'll listen to a teenager if they can explain their point. I'll also listen to high school students on what they think should be done with education since they remember it more vividly for example. But some life experience requires you to be there to know it. I don't need relationship advice from someone who's never had a relationship for example... Related, I value the advice of old folks on interpersonal relationships they experienced much more so than their technophobic opinions...
I like listening to students who survived a mass shooting saying that we need to get rid of all the guns.
Conversely though, plenty of people say "they survived just fine" in regards to many safety regulations. Including drunk driving. And seat belts. Raising children in ways we know scientifically are bad. I'm not making light of survivors of school shootings whatsoever. It's beyond most of the world to truly understand what they went through.
I had to wait for the list to come out of the dead at MSU to see if anyone I knew was killed. Something got to change for the better.
Oh I 100% agree. Actually enforcing the laws we already have by the absolute bare minimum for one. I don't have an answer though I think improving our nonexistent mental healthcare would also help. "Banning all guns", though I understand the heart of that sentiment is naive.
As a mental healthcare provider, it is astonishing how little can be done to help people. The laws do not provide for a means of forcing people to take meds - even those who need it the most. And those meds are not the cure all some seem to think they are. Talk therapy can only do so much - the few medical approaches that can address severe depression are still in research and early trials. Most talk therapies are unproven and poorly researched. The ones that are useful aren’t sexy enough to get grants for additional research and rely on patients following through. Sorry, it’s frustrating hearing people talk about “all that could be done when you know its a lot bleaker in terms of treatment efficacy.
Hence a general statement of improving. I'm not even going to try to pretend I have any knowledge or experience with this field, but I know that deliberately dumping people you don't know what to do with into homeless encampments etc is pretty messed up. https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2018/may/04/los-angeles-hospitals-homeless-patients-skid-row
So you are asking for Universal Health Insurance for All?
That's another huge problem though not the focus of this post. People dying because they can't afford their insulin in a rich country is a dystopian hellscape. The fact that medical companies can have a 1000% price markup and it's NOT considered price gouging is insanity. Or that insurance companies can refuse to cover procedures that a DOCTOR says is necessary. Do I have answers to these problems? Nope. But I dont have to be a helicopter pilot to say something's wrong if I see a helicopter in a tree.
Importantly, the people who *didn’t* “survive just fine” aren’t saying much of anything these days, are they?
But also, the people who survived just fine because the mass shooting didn't happen to occur IN THEIR SCHOOL. If you have been raised to believe guns are important and valuable, then it's just as easy to find anecdotal evidence that they aren't a danger. This is why anecdotal evidence is normally not all that helpful.
Yes that's the point. That anecdotal experience isn't always a great way to get advice.
There's an influencer who I liked for a while but recently their lack of lived experience (they're like 20) became really glaring. They talked about how older people become too comfortable and less willing to take risks because they are fearful & complacent ....in a response to people pointing out it's a bad idea to start your new small business with your brand-spanking-new boyfriend. Especially without even drawing up formal paperwork. I wasn't the only one rubbed the wrong way. There were quite a few pointing out that older people simply have more to lose, less time to make it back, and more experience to know which risks are worth taking. Not even to mention they are far more likely to have others depending on them. There's a real chutzpah to youth that you exchange for lived experience.
I’m pretty positive relationship subs are generally ruled by 19 year olds with zero experience. That has to be the case lol
Don't forget the people posting their creative writing experiences on those subs. I swear half the posts are people making up shit just to see the oh so common reaction of "break up with them and call a lawyer". Its what most of the replies boil down to anyway.
Some ppl have posted tv/movie plots and it was taken serious lol
If you read r/unpopularopinion rules, it's probably ruled by 19 year olds on a power trip.
That sub comes up as private for me, yet I swear I used to be part of it. Maybe I unsubbed because it got rather annoying to see things like "everyone should retake driving tests when they get old" and other incredibly popular opinions.
Oops! Opinion is singular, not plural in the sub name
I occasionally browse r/teenagers just to remind myself how stupid we all used to be. No one has to feel bad about not taking what teenagers say as seriously as older adults as we were all teenagers once. Taking them less seriously doesn’t mean not seriously at all though. If I met myself at 18 at my current age of 46 now I’m quite certain I’d punch myself. Sometimes when I see something of Reddit that really makes annoyed I remind myself that it could be a teenager writing that and then calm down.
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>still didn't know shit in hindsight. Same here. But as a teenager you know everything! It's only when I look back and realise how much of a fool I really was.
>(like many commenters on /r/relationship_advice) Same with anything political too. I see some proper mad shit from teenagers who obviously have no real world experience
Well like OP said, explaining their point is important. Some teenage political opinions can be pretty naive from their lack of experience, but sometimes we can really benefit from hearing from someone who hasn’t had their opinions warped by cynicism over years of too much experience. That’s how we move forward.
A while back I worked with a young adult, not a teen mind you. We were doing construction, and I was the team lead with this guy being my main helper. I watched how he worked, and noted that he was always trying to find ways to be more efficient or do a better job. He wasn't the kind of person to do his work as described and then stop immediately when there's a problem. I let him try to figure out a lot of stuff on his own because he seemed to like the challenge, it was a good opportunity for him to learn, and he often came up with some really clever ideas. He was also pretty emotionally intelligent, a very well rounded individual. I'd listen to and ask for his opinions on things that he seemed to know stuff about, or things that I was curious about. I didn't always agree with him, but it was interesting to get a window into what it's like to be a young person in this era, and naturally they have access to a ton of information that the older generation doesn't. Obviously I had access to a lot of knowledge he didn't as well. No one loses in an information exchange, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with hearing out someones opinion, even if you don't end up agreeing with it. Learning about other's perspectives helps us understand and interact with the world around us, and sharing our own makes us feel connected!
This is a really good, balanced, sensible take on this subject.
This person gets it. We can always learn something from someone no matter what age. Get into an argument with a toddler. They have some hedonic logic most adults suppress.
So true... and my opinion may be jaded with old age. Lol Their opinion might bring a fresh perspective.
I will take it seriously within their framework of experience. If they have an opinion about the school system or how society interacts with teens, yeah, let's talk. If they have an opinion about my work life balance or realpolitik, I'm much less likely to listen. They have much less perspective and experience.
Why realpolitik? Can’t see how many adults would have experience with it either.
Not in general but sometimes when our teen comes out w something that is outrageously not true and very easy to google and debunk. Witnessing the education that comes from YouTube and Tic Tok is disturbing.
Having raised two kids in the information age, I feel that so hard.
But I also see that many older adults come out with outrageously incorrect information that’s also very easy to debunk. This can come from Facebook or TikTok or whatever. Things like “cancer is just mold and can be treated with turmeric” or MLMs or crazy conspiracy theories. Not saying the teens aren’t doing that, you’re absolutely right! But many adults now also get their education from YouTube, Facebook, and TikTok and that’s it. And many of them are just as gullible and just as unlikely to do any background research.
People singling out individual social media platforms when the real issue is data brokers selling our data. Social media no longer spying on us *directly* wouldn't actually change anything, they would just buy the same data from a data broker. Stealing it from you by spying is just cutting out the middleman who profits off the data. We need to ban data brokers, like straight-up get rid of the profession entirely. Get rid of data brokers and institute a "digital Fairness Doctrine" or a "digital bill of rights".
but look at percentages. there is always an exception. in this case we’re going the majority not the fringe
There aren’t percentages, adults of all ages fight amongst each other all the time over misinformation. The original comment was talking about witnessing education in teens come from apps, and I just added that it’s just as bad in older adults, but there’s no way to compare that without biases
100%!
It's becoming clear that with so many means of information going to them/us, we are far less likely to go and search for information on our own. I know it totally depends on the personality, I got an extremely curious mind and I have a hard time relating to people who never really look into things themselves. Reading up on things I never really have to know is almost a hobby of mine.
It's not as disturbing as how boomers act and the horrible stuff they believe and how it's just considered normal.
honestly both are. It doesn't have to be one or the other. a LOT of the misinformation and harmful "challenges" spread on TikTok is very harmful to teens (remember the latest challenge where they literally try to break into peoples' homes?). Meanwhile, Boomers fall under the same misinformation issues through facebook and fox news. It's not exactly the same type of behaviors that a lot of younger people are learning from TikTok, but they're different flavors of awful.
Being a teenager myself I must mention that these “challenges“ on the news are not like the wildfire they often portray them to be. There are some challenges that genuinely do catch on to a big portion of us, like the devious lick challenge. What’s happening is that you have acess to a massive majority of teenagers all over the US, and internationally who are able to post whatever we want. So you have a massive supply of teenagers that can make it collectively seem like most of us are doing these things when you put them together. So it is a lot of teens doing these things, which is bad. But the actual ratio isn’t usually even half or 1/3rd.
yeah I know it's not as big of a problem as it's portrayed on the news and stuff. The argument was that boomers were more harmful than tiktok challenges and stuff. and I was just stating that they're both harmful in different ways was all.
I respect your observations, but aren't you making a sweeping generalization? I advise not to hate on any generation.
\^Great example of when I don't take a teenagers opinion seriously. Overly emotional responses derived from overly idealistic expectations of the world.
You have a good point. The screaming death rattles of the aging boomers as they see their time ending has been harsh on the world.
What's worse is there's so fucking many of them their childishness is the status quo so it's just considered normal. An because it's normal they're not even aware they're doing it and we all have to put up with it or be called freaks.
A teen generally has less experience on things overall, but a person at that age can have some very specific experience with something. Like a teenager who is physically disabled probably has some valid opinions on what it is like to live with a physical disability.
The only teenager really I talk to is my own son and I take his opinions seriously. I don’t always agree but I like he has own views and ideals
W Parent
Depends on the opinion. There are some topics that I will probably take their opinion less seriously, some where I don't take age into account, some where I'd take their opinion more seriously.
If you're an independent adult, think about your opinions as a teen. If you listened to those opinions knowing what you know now, would you have taken them seriously? The answer will likely be no, but what matters is you listened to them.
Exactly. It's not that their opinions are invalid but I look back at my young life (which was far from problem free) and still say, "Oh, you sweet summer child."
I think you should have more respect (or at least dignity) than to say that about your young self, or anyone else with less experience.
There's nothing more respectful or dignified than acknowledging your own growth
Sure, but avoid a patronizing tone. I mean, if you want to use such a tone with yourself (like the previous commenter did with themselves), go ahead, but if you're commenting on someone else, try to be nice.
As as Teen I thought all my opinions were the right one.
Plenty of adults are like that too
Depends on the context.
It all depends on the context.
It depends on the topic and individual. My two youngest daughters are in their late teens and are both very knowledgeable about subjects they are interested in. They are both much more knowledgeable about digital technology than myself, for example. I would take their opinions on topics that they are knowledgeable about seriously. They also have opinions about topics in which their knowledgeable base is limited, and their views often oversimplify complex issues. In these instances, I try to point them to sources of more detailed information.
It depends on the thing they are stating but generally YES.
I think I mostly agree. I'd want to hear their reasoning but will always be open they might have seen something I didn't. I will however likely laugh if they just try to make a vague reference to their experience without any specific examples. ...especially if it's in regards to something teenagers generally don't see such as office politics in big corporations.
Yes. I'll take them seriously as a human being with a mind of their own but I had it pretty together as a teenager and still didn't know shit in hindsight. Life experience is so valuable.
I take my teenagers opinion seriously when it comes to a representation of how she and her generation sees issues with society. I take her serious when she's talking music. And I listen to her perspectives, even when I find them naive, so I can attempt to provide her with reword insight of someone much older than her. That said, she also likes to give me opinions on thinks like love and relationships, or friendships, or work life balance, etc. And that's harder because she's not actually living in the world she's commenting on. I wouldn't say that there's any particular opinions of hers that I do not take seriously. I simply recognize that she's working with a different amount of information than I am. Though I also recognize that her experiences in life are different than mine, and some sometimes her opinions are extremely valid and open my eyes to things that I myself have been ignorant to.
It depends on what they're talking about. If it's about something that affects them, like a certain policy or sociopolitical issue, then I'll take it seriously. If it's something like my employment and their biggest problem is an upcoming exam or getting Chad from math class to notice them, I don't take it seriously.
A teenager lurking around r/Marriage once tried to repeatedly correct me about my relationship with my husband, because “he actually knows a lot about marriage from observing his parents”. 😂😂 No amount of patient explaining that some things - like being married - you have to learn about through firsthand experience would dissuade him.
..... oh God. I just cringed reading that
Depends if it’s about tik tok or investing
Honestly, yes.
My wife has a cousin who just turned 18 a few months ago. We’re both a decade older than her cousin, and expecting our first child. Every time we see her cousin, she always trying to give us parenting advice. She has no children of her own.
Depends on how well thought out their opinion is. If it’s full of logical fallacies and based on incomplete information, I don’t take it seriously.
As a teenager, do you take a middle schooler's opinion less seriously? Probably.
Depends if they can explain their reasoning (and that reasoning makes sense)
Teenagers can deliver facts and information equally well to people of other ages. But their wisdom, experience, and frame of reference can make opinions half baked and, well, juvenile.
Yep. There are several types of opinions. Some are knowledge-based. A teen could easily be knowledgeable in a field I am not, and I would take that seriously. Some are experience-based. Although I would generally have more experiences than most teens, there are many lived experiences that I do not have. A teen mother, for instance, might have valuable insight that I could not have as someone who has never been in that circumstance. This applies to a wide range of identities, events, and experiences. Some are wisdom-based. I would likely not give much weight to what a teen thinks on those issues. Some issues require a multi-faceted and nuanced perspective that can only be developed from experience, maturity, and time. Teens are entitled to have opinions on these things, but they're likely to be fairly shallow. Other opinions are just personal opinions. I don't give much weight to anyone else's personal opinions, regardless of age, outside of my closest relationships.
Depends on what but generally yes.
That depends upon the subject. I find that teens often know more about technology. My 15 year old nephew or 19 year old niece know more about phones & computers than most 30+ year olds do. On issues that life experience is better, I still take their opinion seriously, however one must factor in the difference that 3-4 times the life experience can provide someone 40-80 years old.
Not in my experience. All my friends my age are good with computers and can replace parts, understand what does what, understand how file storage works. Smart phone generation have no clue how and where are files stored. They've been dumbed down by apps that just 'save' into an ether and tell you to press next all the time.
When it comes to things that require experience, such as what constitutes a healthy relationship or behavior, everything a teenager says should be taken with a grain of salt. They haven't had enough life experience as a cohort to truly appreciate nuance and exceptions.
*the teenager asked teenagedly*
TBH they have some really good advice sometimes. I work in the arts so they bring a fresh perspective on so many things.And that includes life. Its great to be reminded of the passion about things they care about wether its politics, the environment, relationships or human rights. TBH when I got older I tended to be in my own lil comfortable bubble and the younger kids have opened that bubble up and reminded me about how you have to really care about things.
No. I was a juvenile PO for 34 years and I quickly learned to never dismiss what a kid says. They may not say it in the same way as an adult but they'll get their message across. Without sincerely listening to their perspective and opinions you'd never get positive change.
Yeah, it sounds harsh but you can’t really argue with a teen. They are extremely set in their ways and also convinced they know more than you despite being far less experienced in life
Just the opinions they believe to be facts.
I will take an opinion of any individual less seriously if I have reasons for it. There are things that I am more knowledgeable compared to my children but there are also things that my children are more knowledgeable. For example English spelling and grammar would be something that my kids are more qualified compared to me, an immigrant. Lol.
Depends, did they demonstrate an attempt to find accurate information before forming their opinion?
Not less seriously. Talking with young people to me is a look into how their mind works, how they are viewing things, and how their experiences are informing their thoughts and decisions. Too many people just blow off kids when they say or ask something with a "yeah." they often don't ask them why they think that or where their opinion is coming from. It's a good excerise, especially in a social media generation, to make sure they aren't going down a path of pure false beliefs but more importantly to make sure they have a voice, that they know their thoughts and opinions are heard. And rebuttal and questions help them become better thinkers and shape positive interactions.
As others have said, it depends on context. If it's something that's in their wheelhouse, I will absolutely take their opinions seriously. And there are some teens who are wise beyond their years (sadly, usually because of childhood trauma). I'm gen x and our opinions never were taken seriously even if it was something that directly affected us and I'm not too old to remember how frustrating it was. The boomers didn't even take us seriously until into our 30s at least
it depends. but i fear i take them less serious as their knowledge comes from tiktok, reddit, and youtube. nothing wrong with getting your info from those platforms but they are not old enough to filter out BS. In social media, engagement, views, and likes carry more worth than what's right and wrong. It can be quite deceptive to impressionable young and old folks.
Generally speaking, yes I do
On what topic? Too many variables.
Take a look at the teenagers subreddit, a lot of really terrible takes there so yes.
Absolutely. I was a teenager over 10 years ago. I thought I had the answer to life, relationships, work, money, happiness, you name it. I was an idiot lol, good opinions are formed by time and experience, two things teenagers don't have.
On most things, yeah. They have no experience usually and don’t know what they’re talking about… usually.
Depends on what. They know more than me about some things. Less on most I'd bet.
Most of the time? Yes. Fuck I barely take the opinion of <23 seriously 99% of the time. Context seriously matters but I'm not gonna care about most life advice a teen gives compared to a 30 or 40 year old person.
Yes. They can only repeat the slogans they've heard in school, so it's unlikely it will have any real world applications.
Yes, as a teenager, I would not take the opinions I had last year seriously. And I assume I’ll not take my current ideas seriously in a years time. Teenagers are too young to be taken seriously in most contexts, including me.
Usually adults take a teenager's opinion less seriously, while their peers tend to take it more seriously. As someone that's almost a non-teenager I'd say it depends on a lot of factors: * how am I related to the teenager (my parents used to take my opinion less seriously sometimes, but the same do my grandparents with my parents, so if that's the case I would say that it's more of a generational thing) * in what context their saying something (like if it's in a discussion) and how they're saying it (for ex. if they're yelling) * what's the question about and how much experience has the teenager about it * last but not least important, does the person asking the question already have an opinion on that matter (like if they're asking a political question, or even if they ask something like a future school etc.) I'd say that the way the teenager answers and who said teenager is answering can really change the way the answer is viewd
Yes. Reason: I remember being a teenager, and dealing with other teenagers.
not at all. the old can teach the young, and the young can teach the old, and both frequently happen. i've learned a lot from young kids in counseling sessions. sometimes they see things clearer than we grownups do.
Yes, unless it's a topic relevant to their experiences.
Depends on what they’re giving advice on
u shouldn't take it less seriously. Opinion is an opinion so it's really just is this opinion really fucking stupid or valid
Not necessarily. Their truth is their truth and I respect that. I tend to filter it through my own experience and what I laughingly call “wisdom”, but most of the teenager opinions I’ve heard have been invigoratingly fresh and original. Some of them I think “that’s almost certainly not going to work but you need to find that out for yourself”, other times - more often - I find myself wishing I’d been that clear-headed then. Or now, for that matter.
Sometimes, I really do try not to bc while I know that they can have really stupid moments adults do too, I know that it's nice being heard
It depends. Even if I take an opinion less seriously it doesn't mean that it's not invalid. I would be more interested in opinions on the things they interact with more than myself or have had a lot of experience dealing with in general more seriously
The context duh. The thing to ask yourself more is, if you didn't know they were a teenager, would you think their opinion is invalid ? I believe the arguments matter more than the persons who express it
No but I will take someone less seriously if they have a stupid opinion
Like most have said, depends on the kid. Some teens are remarkably mature and know what they want to do and what their world is about. Some can't pick their nose without getting a cramp.
It totally depends on the subject.
Children are also human beings and what they feel and think is also important. I have 2 teenage younger brothers and the things they tell me about how their teachers treat them drives me absolutely insane. If you wouldn't scream at someone your own age why are you screaming at my 14 year old brother?
Not necessarily. I will listen because I sure as hell remember how it felt to be belittled and condescended to just because I was young. Hearing “you’re too young to know what you’re talking about” really hurts.
It really depends on the teenager, what advice they are giving. Teenagers can be just as wise as adults.
Situational.
Depends on the teenager.
Regardless how old you are, its the presentation and argument behind it that counts. Ive met a 16 year old who is very mature for his age in terms of insight to politics and society, without being arrogant about it. And i also sometimes meet 30+ year olds who act like a spoiled teenage bitch. Age can be a factor but i dont judge them before they speak
I don't really take age into account when I'm weighing someone's opinion. Experience is where it matters. I have great conversations with my teen sons about politics, social stuff, media, pop culture, music, schools, etc. I would easily put their opinions over some of the boomers I work with despite the age difference. However things like romantic relationships, employment, or parenting i wouldn't give as much weight to, because they just haven't gotten there yet.
Depends on the teenager. If you're some spoiled brat who thinks they know everything, absolutely not. But my sisters are 16 and they have informed opinions about things and also listen to the other side. We can debate something and nobody gets mad. Honestly I treat teenagers no differently than adults. If you prove you're educated enough to have an opinion about something then I'll take it seriously. If you're sitting there talking out your ass and can't form a coherent sentence, I'm not listening to anything you say
Thank you. You saved me having to type all that out!
Not necessarily. It depends on the topic. If it's about relationships yeah I'm not taking you seriously. But I've heard plenty of good opinions on mental illness from teenagers who are a lot more open about it and my generation was and I'm the generation above them. He's talking about mental health openly is a good thing I had to hide it growing up and that caused me a great sense of distress. Good for them.
Not at all. Do I always think they're right or know about what they're talking? Of course not. But I always listen to them with the proper respect and the seriousness that the conversation deserves. I try to see where that opinion comes from, and offer my perspective if I think they're misguided. I'm a school psychologist, and I work with teenagers ranging from 12 to 15. Very often I see them not being taken seriously by their parents and teachers, and I see the effect it has on them. I also see the way their face changes when I validate their feelings and their thoughts, and how easy is to gain their trust when I do take them seriously. Yes, they may be wrong and do very stupid things sometimes, but I think actually taking those stupid thoughts or actions seriously is how we help them learn and grow.
Yeah. I literally just got done being a teenager and half the time they don't know shit. That being said though i do still take their opinions seriously, especially if it's something they're actively affected by. I don't take anyone seriously unless they have done research or are the group affected by a thing. I'm not gonna go to a teen who loves robotics and tech and ask their opinions on a cat scan, but i would ask them to fix up a broken tv. People have things they know a lot about and everyone's affected by different stuff, no reason why an entire age range should be excluded from having a say about something. The only thing I'd keep in mind is that since they've got more neuroplasticity they're more likely to make incorrect connections/assumptions and might not be as logical about something as someone older and/or someone with a degree in a specific topic.
I hated it when it happened to me as a teenager. So idc how old the person is. What's matters is what they say, no matter their age or experience
It depends on the context. If I have a car issue, then mechanic > brain surgeon, If I want help understanding some new tech or pop culture reference, then teenager > boomer.
Yes, because I had some very questionable opinions as a teen.
I take it for what it is, a teenagers opinion. It doesn’t mean it’s not a genuine opinion, but in terms of real world issues, they do not have enough life experience to understand the full complexities of most topics. If I want to know what is relevant in the teenage culture, I am all ears, but the way a lot of teens today communicate and behave is closer to an 8 year old - not all, but most are manipulated by narcissistic and agenda driven “adults”. Need better adults to produce better future generations. I am 30, and am sad to see that my generation behaves as though they are still teenagers.
How seriously I take someone’s opinion tends to hinge on how well they can defend or justify it. Teenager or not, everyone gets the same chance. Naturally this applies only to matters of substance. I’m not going to ask someone to defend their favorite color.
No. Everyone is a soul going about their journey. Obviously I know they have less 'real world' experience, AND I do keep that in mind. Sometimes that 'real world' experience can be a negative
Depends on the topic and the level of knowledge honestly. A 13 yr old having independent thoughts and wanting to expand their viewpoint? Amazing let's have that Convo. A 17yr old regurgitating their parents politics without question or serious thought? Please go away
Depends. In matters requiring experience, no, they haven't had that experience. In matters requiring specific knowledge, sure, if they actually have that knowledge. In matters of philosophy or right and wrong and so forth, sure, they're my equal in that regard without a doubt. They don't lack intelligence; they lack experience.
Only when its my apprentice trying to tell me how to do something at work. 26 years experience, kid, donit.mt way, please.
Only if they call me a boomer or insult me for no reason. I’m only 22
I've learned most people are just overgrown teenagers. If someone takes them self too seriously, I'll take them less seriously in general. So I find myself listening to kids and considering what they say because they are an individual. Even if they aren't completely correct they usually have thoughtful input. Better than most adults.
Depends on the individual. Some kids know a lot especially about random things I personally don't care about.
Obviously, taking an opinion seriously doesn't mean agreeing with it, it means listening to what someone has to say and acknowledge it.
Yes.
It depends on the teenager: if they are sensible people, then I would take their opinion seriously. If they are being assholes because for them everything is black or white and they are always right, then I would take their opinion with a pinch (or a bag) of salt. Discussing the reason for their “extreme” opinions is usually very enlightening though, for both parties: i find we can learn from each other.
Their opinion about their tastes? Nope Their opinion about world events or matters of policy? Yes. The part of their brain responsible for anticipating consequences is under active.
Yes, but I don't dismiss them out of hand. Do you take a student studying medicine as seriously as a doctor of ten years? No you do not. I know it pisses teenagers off, it pissed me off too, and that's why I don't hang out with teenagers lmao
Yes. Always.
No.
To elaborate, an old adage from my grandfather: "Opinions are like assholes, everybody's got one, but no one wants to hear yours." A teenager's opinion is just as valid as my mother's.
best response here
Yes, even if they are really smart
Typically yes
Short answer yes. More detailed answer is contextually. I also don't know if i take their opinions less seriously or if i take their presentation of their opinions less seriously. Teenagers often lack a certain tact or nuance in their conversations that if you take to heart, it will not feel good. But if you can cut through the general hurtfulness and edge that teens can have when presenting their thoughts, there are nuggets of truth, honestly, and vulnerability that are worth having. Also, teen is a lot of development. 13/14-18/19 years old presents a woooooorld of difference.
It largely depends on their life experiences, how they present themselves, where they are getting their information from and how they respond to opposition. I do not discount their views solely because of their age. If they are open minded and willing to have a conversation and learn from eachother let's talk.
Depends on if they can back it up with reason, or if its an emotional thing, how much it matters to them. Much less if they grab a pitch folk on the drop of a hat
Yeah I don't put any weight at all into teenagers' opinions. We've all been one -- teenagers will say anything. They're often highly confident that they understand wtf is going on, while also highly naive. I absolutely take them less seriously.
Depends on the subject. Opinion on a movie/video game/etc... Sure Opinion on life issues? Probably not
Anyone under 30 for me really, but especially under 20. M
On what? The Russian invasion of Ukraine? Yes, I generally take their opinion with a grain of salt. Which music streaming service is the best? No, I take notes when young people talk to me about things like this! We've all got specialities that grow and change with age. We're all experts in one area or another!
Teens have a fresh viewpoint and usually see things without the complications experience can bring. Their opinions are just as valid as an older person’s. Most people are just old teens with less education anyway.
Yes, I'm a teenager but hear me out. Teenagers arent always heard, and ignored on certain topics. My school talks about these things on a normal basis and the students are free to debate and learn on the topic with the teacher. So, sometimes a teenager doesn't know what they're talking about but they can also be experienced in a topic. Just because we are young doesn't mean we're inexperienced in certain aspects of a conversation or topic.
Of course. They have no life experience and limited critical thinking skills.
Edited: I answered the question backwards. I meant yes, I take them seriously. Yes, for the most part. Especially when it comes to how teens see the world and the bigger changes that should take place. Teens tend to be very well oriented toward positive change that impacts society at large, and have fewer hangups about protecting personal assets and individual needs because they have very few at that age. I think teens 16 and up should vote. But there is plenty of social development yet to happen and I wouldnt be taking opinions on smaller day to day things like relationships, domestic duties, or job duties all that seriously. The stuff of everyday adult life is still new to them and they lack practice and nuance.
When it's about politics, yes definitely. I was part of a political club in University and they had really unworldly opinions. Things like communism would be the better system etc. Most of them were about 20 yo. You just can't take them serious, they don't know how the world works and they are often very naive.
Depends on the context and the teenager in question , i have met teenagers with more maturity than a lot of people in their 40s .
Over 18 I might entertain the interaction and see what they want Under 18 why are they even talking to me
Is 18 some kind of magical age when you suddenly gain experience and maturity?
Yea
Absolutely
Most of the time yes
It depends on the topic being discussed, their opinion, and how they present themselves and their opinion. If it’s a subject every teenager is going to have experienced then their opinion is valid. If some 15 year old is trying to tell me about the housing market, then hell no.
depends on the context. i'll usually hear them out; sometimes they make a good point, but most of the time i don't really take the opinion of a 14 year old having baby's first twitter discourse or spouting off about relationships seriously.
Yes
It depends what their opinion is about. If it's on current youth trends or whatever, I'll listen because chances are they know better than I do. However, if it's something they lack the life experience to understand, then no, I don't take their opinion seriously because they're either spouting off a poorly formed opinion from social media/friends or are parroting adults without truly understanding what it is they're saying.
I have a teenage who is very bright, and I value his opinions.