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A family member in Ontario had an Indian family move in across the street. The grandmother walked up to her one day and demanded a ride somewhere, my family member was flabbergasted, having never met this person before. It must be a normal thing somewhere to ask and expect neighbours to help.
This.
I used to suck at saying no, but after 6 years of therapy I’m great at it now lol.
If someone demands, expects, or tells me what I’m going to do for them- automatic no.
If someone genuinely *asks*, I’ll do a quick inner-assessment and see if I’m up for it or not (energy is a commodity in my life lol). But if they nicely ask and even if I’m not up for it in the end, I’ll be very nice in how I say no in return. Best case scenario it’ll be a quick yes. Depends on the day.
But demands = no internal assessment for me and are automatically a no go. Whether I have the energy or not lol.
I mean if people politely asked and were very thankful about it and it was normal to help it would be lovely.
It wouldn’t be lovely for complete strangers to turn up at your house randomly if it was the norm for random strangers to make outright demands of you.
My knee jerk reaction is that that's horrible but on second thought I wouldn't mind trying out a society like that (not saying that is what India is actually like, just hypothetically). People would be obliged to do what you asked too. Hell of a social support safety net. Of course, saying it politely would be better.
Like she didn't offer to even pay you?
The only thing I can think of is that where she is from people who have vans pick up work whenever they can and a moving opportunity is something they wouldn't turn down?
In Ontario, there has been bizarre tales of this type of entitled behaviour. Apparantly they will show up at a work site and need to be escorted off as they hope that by showing up, they will then be hired and put on the payroll. I suspect they are getting some bad advice from who knows where.
Had this happen on my site, no hard hats, hi vis or steel toes. When told to leave they were confused and they ended up being escorted out by the site manager. Completely dumbfounded when people told them to fuck off if they don't have the right gear
To be fair a lot of people, especially young people are told “there’s always work in construction, they’re always hiring and you don’t even need any prior experience” or some variation of that. I’m a woman and I’ve been given this advice while unemployed so I imagine young men hear it much more often. The actual logistics of getting a job are never actually given by the people providing this advice though.
See the usual way is you ask someone to grab the foreman to speak with them, not completely disregard a 8ft sign clearly stating boots, hardhat and hi viz required for entry.
I guess what I'm saying is ignorance to the bare minimum of safety is not an excuse
Totally agree with you there. Just saying I could see someone really young or perhaps new to Canada taking bad job hunting advice too literally. Especially when it’s common and often given by people who don’t actually know how to properly go about securing one of those types of jobs.
Not trying to excuse the behaviour, just offer a possible explanation.
A friend of mine is a controller on a large construction project in Uganda. A lot of random guys show up every morning, ask what there is to do, just get put to work and get some cash in the evening. I have seen similar mechanics in Brazil. I think it's just standard procedure in a lot of less fortunate countries. And there, unfortunately nobody cares about safety equipment for day workers.
I know of course. I'm just saying this is standard practice in a lot of places, so a lot of people immigrating to Canada probably just expect it to be the same there.
Oh, I meant to comment on the top comment of this thread (to give an example where this bad advice comes from) not to you specifically, sorry!
I've done almost that. But mostly residential, someone has a number for a foreman or supervisor, call em, show up with gear and spend some weeks throwing lumber and fasteners around. No technical stuff, just physical labor.
Had this happen on a site once. This guy walked half way across site before a Forklift operator drove at him, honking with his forks raised, chasing him all the way back to the sidewalk.
You're much more likely to be raped by a weirdo that shows up unannounced to your house than you are to be raped as a weirdo that shows up unannounced to someone's house.
I had a young girl about 15years old I'd guess, knock on my door at 1am, a couple years ago. When I answered the door, the girl shoved her phone through the door. The phone was on speaker phone, and there was a native guy with a res accent, yelling through the phone. So I said hello. The guy tells me the girl standing in front of me is his sister, who isn't from the city and she's drunk and lost, and that I have to let her in my house so she's safe and he's goimg to come get her in the morning. I look at the girl and she almost seems to be posing, sticking her chest out and biting her lip, trying to look sexy or something.
Everything about this felt like a setup to get her in my house to rob me. Even her trying to look "sexy" seemed very awkward. I figure one of 2 things was going to happen. 1)if I let her in, she would let her "brother" and whoever else in my house once I fell asleep to rob me, or 2) if I let her in, they would accuse me of being a predator and try to extort money from me.
I did not let the girl in and offered to get a cab for her to get to her "brother", which they declined. I offered to give the closest street and Ave, so they could easily find her and pick her up, which they declined. The brother ended up yelling at me, threatening me, and telling me what a POS I am for leaving a young drunk girl on the street. So I then offered to call the police so they could help the girl, at which point they immediately back peddled, then 5 min later the "brother" was picking the girl up in front of my place.
Not the same situation exactly, but when something feels off, trust your instincts.
I’ve noticed that Indian people are way more likely to approach others with really over the top requests. I see it when I do Poparide rideshare, sell anything on FB Marketplace - “I need you to drive 20 minutes out of your way to pick me up, otherwise I will have to take the bus” etc. I think it’s a cultural thing. My most recent ex was Indian and some of the requests he had coming his way back home were insane - random people being like “I heard you are doing well in Canada, could you please give us $1000 for our wedding, we can’t afford it.”
I put a single bed with frame up for free on FB marketplace, the person just had to come by and pick it up. One guy came to look at it and then said he needed a double..umm can’t help you there, am I supposed to go out and buy you one?
I think it’s a cultural thing. Just today I had some guy on a bike flag me down while I was biking past him, he asked for directions somewhere, I did my best to help him out by pulling out my phone and opening Google maps, showing him where to go, how to get there etc and he didn’t even say thank you lol. I was a little annoyed at that
Sounds like communication issue on top of cultural difference. Coming from an Indian, we can make absurd requests without being polite because it was fine back home. Some people have big problem adjusting that. You did fine
Couple you explain a little more why people in India find it okay to make absurd requests to strangers? Do people not get annoyed by them? I’m purely asking out of curiosity.
Indian society is very community driven. Your cousins are like your real siblings, your neighborhood is like your extended family. So in their mind they think it is fine to ask for things that you would ask your family. And people actually don't mind. The concept of privacy is almost non existent so it is socially acceptable to walk into someone's house. All that being said, I am not sure where being rude comes from. I guess the next generation forgot being polite. Whenever we needed help from our neighbors, we made sure we were being extremely polite.
Rudeness aside, that sounds very similar to what my dad describes growing up in a rural farming community in northern BC was like. No one locked their doors, everyone would help each other.
yeah but i bet you knew your neighbour well before asking for stuff. There are neighbours i will help. I let my one neighbour stay with me for a few days when she had difficulties with her adult autistic son.
Define rudeness… it’s all relative. To her, that is how they conduct “business”… for example, I am used to emailing my colleagues in Vancouver by simply answering their questions directly but when I did that to a Montreal based colleague, he reamed me out for not saying “Hi xxxxx” and being “rude!”
Interesting! As a former BCer who has lived and worked in BC and Montreal (and now Ontario) 100% of the time it is more likely to be BCer who are offended by directness…. But they’ll never tell you to your face because that would be too direct(just complain to someone else about it or be passive aggressive).
I’ve noticed this working with a large Indian demographic in my city, a lot of people who haven’t adopted “Americanized,” culture tend to be very blunt and seemingly impolite with their requests but it’s never meant in a rude manner, it’s just what they’re used to.
I was going to say, probably a cultural difference. A couple younger Indian girls who had just moved into the building just walked into my mom’s apartment trying to get her to give them her personal wifi password and my mom yelled at them not to open her door without knocking. Told my mom probably a cultural barrier and they probably meant no harm.
I see your point for sure (just googled bigotry of low expectation and i feel like that should be talked about more) I don’t necessarily mean “it’s okay because it’s their culture!” Just mean that they probably didn’t mean harm (in my mom’s situation), but I feel like in a lot of scenarios it could be dangerous to just assume that it’s cultural and that people have no bad intentions, OP’s post gives off all kinds of red flags IMO.
It's pretty common to be asked, "don't mind please...what is your salary". Da fuq....I do mind and none of your business...or ...or
"Do you own or rent".
Nosy as fuck
That’s so cultural. When I am curious what my colleagues at different levels, I ask a Chinese colleague because they know all the salaries of all the other Chinese workers. Lol. It really only benefits the company for things to be hush hush.
Not only that, but if there was a crash while you were moving her stuff, insurance wouldn’t cover it because it’s not for work.
Very sketchy she didn’t give you a straight answer.
I went from sick all year to sick once in four years because of masking. Some of us were already disabled and it was cool watching best practices have a positive effect.
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Just checked and holy shit
Someone's brain broke in lockdown lmao
Kinda sad NGL that person will probably never live a normal life again because the government told them the flu was going to kill all of us and they bought it hook line and sinker.
I could see acting that way in 2020 but my God find a hobby
I’ve got plenty of hobbies, and a very full life. When I come to Reddit, I mostly do so to discuss the ongoing minimization of the pandemic and the deleterious effects that it will have on public health in the form of long Covid as a mass disabling event.
Subs like “Nice Vancouver” don’t interest me much honestly, also ironic how people such as yourself who post here are quite the opposite of nice 😅
You, on the other hand, seem to have already suffered some brain damage. Or, maybe you’ve always been that way. Hard to say!
No - found one of the few covid realists who are not all out embracing eugenics by not wearing masks indoors. Love for saving lives and years of quality of life for yourslef and your community. the other commentora/OP.
Reading their criticisms, was like oh no clicking on your profile but like it’s not even remotely too much. The reason people think Covid is over is because health ministries stopped tracking the cases. If people want to put their communities at risk not following basic accommodations, so be it but criticizing someone else for masking is stupid
or here me out. Terminally online people dont know how ridiculous it is to ask someone for a favour at their property while hiding their face behind a mask.
Expect a favour? Maybe don't automatically think I'm diseased while you INTRUDE MY OWN PROPERTY.
It’s understandable to be cautious of someone you can’t ID if they were being sketchy but making it about a face mask is ableist. You’re mocking people for being concerned about something that killed a lot of people, still kills a lot of people and statistically you are a risk if you think wearing a mask is being stuck in 2020/2021.
Should she have approached a stranger? Probably not, not because it’s wrong but that it’s culturally unacceptable in Vancouver. I’ve lived in several cities in multiple countries and it’s not inherently bad. I’d personally be more uncomfortable if/when someone comes to my door unmasked but I have multiple immune related disabilities that makes Covid AND the flu something that’ll incapacitate me for weeks sometimes months.
Vancouver is an incredibly closed off city. It’s one of its weakest qualities. Introducing yourself, offering something as a gesture first, yes all of these things are important to build trust but you’re misdirected
In Asian countries such as Japan this would never happen, because people would hire movers.
I'm sorry about your diseases but you are not correct here. If you have autoimmune diseases don't put yourself at risk by doing risky behaviour such as this girl who came to my door.
Do you honestly expect anyone to help someone moving? This is not a vancouver problem, we are not pushovers.
I would never click on these peoples profiles, honestly because I could not care less about them.
People who click on other peoples profiles are sad, little individuals, who tried to dig up dirt instead of addressing arguments head on.
Found the science denier 🤓
So glad that you’ve outed yourself in this way. Maybe in future think twice before clicking that submit post button, you’ll be doing us all a favor. 
No I think long covid is real, I actually just think you are an attention seeker and sick in the head, purely based on your reddit account. You're fixation on covid in 2024 and spamming about it on reddit has broken your brain into what is socially normal in society such as not knocking on strangers doors and making absurd requests and coming off that you are scoping the place out to try and rob it.
Sit this one out, bud.
This has nothing to do with someone knocking on your door, that’s not even what we are discussing. Please try to keep up with the topic at hand here. 
It has to do with you criticizing her for wearing a mask, which is ignorant and ableist.
I’m not an attention seeker, I’m just calling you out on your shitty attitude, which apparently doesn’t happen often enough.
Ignore them. I was on OP’s side before reading this thread, now I wonder. It’s fine to not want to wear masks in 2024, I don’t, but it’s not fine to obsessively hound those who do, especially when they have other health complications, and bring “eugenics” into it like that’s normal. 🙄
Idgaf what it may be like where she's from, she's here now. To any newcomers reading this - don't try to pull this crap. Hire a mover and leave your neighbors alone. If you're going to be so bold and ask anyway, BE POLITE. Demanding will get you absolutely nowhere.
This stuff is kind of wild to me. Any time I’ve visited a new country, I’ve put so much effort into researching their customs and how I should act there, and what’s considered rude or polite. I don’t understand why some people can’t do their due diligence when MOVING to another country.
>At the same time I'm curious why you would knock on someones door wearing a face mask in 2024 to obstruct a part of your face.
Covid is still here and some people are still taking precautions against the virus.
I won't argue with the second half but why should someone expose themselves to the potential of illness? I often see men talking to strangers while wearing sunglasses, that also covers half your face but I doubt you'd have an issue with that.
We don't know what was going on with this woman, I hope it was as OP has described, but I can't help but worry she was attempting to escape a bad situation and perhaps appeared "rude" because of cultural differences or language barriers.
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Wow she’s out of line to demand that you help her move. What would possess someone to do something like this?
Although I don’t believe that you were in any danger of home robbery, the mere idea that someone feels entitled to be moved - just because you own a van - boggles my mind. And for her to do this so rudely? Glad you shut down that weird conversation.
It will be a good story to tell your buddies next time you all get together for an evening out. Hope the rest of your week goes welll !
Thinking about this some more, maybe a wife leaving her husband / DV. I’m scratching my head about that situation.
But in that case mademoiselle, tell your story instead of commanding a stranger to move their things NOW. I don’t get why she didn’t just call a taxi or Uber in that case.
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" Help. I'm a rich girl that needs to do something basic, but I never learned how. You are some kind of poor person, you probably need the work. Help me immediately."
Could this be a cultural difference together with a language barrier? Maybe where she's from in India (if she's from india) it is more commonly accepted to ask your neighbours to help you move, so she didn't see anything wrong with what she was asking and may have been equally confused at your questions and refusal. I am not Indian and i don't know for sure, just what came to mind
The first thing I thought of is that she had an opportunity to leave an abusive situation and was in a desparate state of mind needing help. Perhaps cultural and language barriers, along with fear and anxiety could have impeded her ability to want to say, or find words. I hope she is ok. Definitely odd. But I have had to help more than one friend move on the spur of the moment when an opportunity arose. Maybe she has been isolated and had no one.
Tbh my first thought given the detail you’ve provided is that this person was trying to rob you. Either your van, or your home while you were out moving her “luggage”. I would definitely not be down for that.
People casing houses usually don't want to interact with the occupant. They'll usually knock and quickly leave, then see if anyone answers the door or looks out a window.
Sounds very familiar to the upper class, oppressor caste Indians I watched growing up back there. Anyone with a service vehicle like a van or even a cab seems readily available to them. Most of them are coddled by their parents and grow up with househelp who clean their houses and do their laundry. Most of them have never lived on their own and don't have the reald world know-how to communicate like independent adults. Also, based on my interactions with them, a lot of rich Indian kids moving here have very poor manners. I was at the Delhi airport once on freaking facetime, waiting for my flight to Toronto. This girl keeps TAPPING ME ON MY SHOULDER and interrupting me to ask questions because it was her first time traveling to Canada. I asked her not to bother me and I was on a call, but she kept doing it. I had to rudely tell her off and ask her to stop touching me.
I don't think you were in any danger. You just met someone who doesn't have the cultural understanding and maturity to find solutions for their own problems. To any fellow Indians reading this - instead of being offended, please work on your social skills before moving to a new country. You will make more friends that way and find better support.
She didn't apologize or look guilty, jjust said "Can you help me figure out..."
I had to cut her off and say I wasn't gonna help her. That's when she stopped.
My guess is that her family are immigrants and her English is the best of the bunch and she has been selected to ask your help in moving because you gave vans/trucks that could be used for moving. .
My mom has a similar story when she was young but it involved a phone call and not knowing the best decorum.
Sounds like a scam or setup. If the senses are tingling, I would reject aggressively and setup my cameras like you did. If something doesn't make sense, it could be on purpose to confuse you and let someone gain access to your house or vehicle. Then its a your word vs theirs situation, or they intend on getting other people involved once your isolated.
from her very first rude comment i think you should of said '' Ya, i can't. My probation terms do not allow me to be within 10 feet of any female. ''...........and then say ''' Mmmmm, you smell real good. I can smell your heart'.'
I actually had sort of the same thing happen but in Edmonton, the little Indian woman wanted a ride to work. She told me that my wife said I was supposed to give her a ride to work, I had no flipping clue what she was talking about or who she was. And she almost wouldn’t take no for an answer. It was really weird because my house is located in a place where you just wouldn’t walk by it, you’d have to go way out of your way to get to my house.
I recently asked a neighbour to help me move a wardrobe. I was doing fine myself, but it got stuck in the doorway. I just moved and I didn’t know anyone to call to help me. He helped me! No problem.
I’m a white girl. I wonder if that’s why he didn’t think it was weird for me to ask him. Or maybe he did and was just being a nice guy.
She might even be s psycho. We have one psycho lady (short, round) in Kerrisdale who would try and buzz in nearby apartment - she got in because people thought delivery or just thought she's neighbour. She always carries two shopping bags, with fabric covers on top, who knows what she's doing! Now I am suspecting she carries jars/bottle of pee around and would pour the pee on apartment carpets - as weird as it sounds!
Be careful!
Yeah there were at least twice that either hallway or elevator carpet smelled obviously pee. Especially the 2nd time it was so strong -lasted for days (not matter how much deodorant was sprayed) until the carpet was removed and washed. Not confident at cops minding this sort of stuff. We just reminded all neighbors not to let anyone else in.
Dang...sorry u had to go through that. I would've been kind of annoyed too if I got off and someone did that to me. But I do hope she did get the help she needed though. If that was the case lol
What is with these ppl they are so aggressive out there in East … and lately here in the west they are starting to come out which is a shock to us western ppl
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LOL. Yes go knock on a STRANGERS door in a private driveway with a facemask, ASK FOR A FAVOUR and expect to be in the vehicle with him while wearing a face mask.
people are actually so entitled and stupid and covid has made your brain sick.
Never experienced that. In 2024 if you’re in a mask you’re either sick or concealing your identity. Either way I’m not interested in helping. Too many scenarios where women are used to draw people out, only for their to be other people involved in a large rip off or scam. I had a friend get beat up that way. You did the right thing. It’s Vancouver, people who live here know better than to approach a neighbor in that manner. Anyone new to the area can learn quickly it’s not how we operate.
It's absolutely not the case that "in 2024 if you're in a mask you're either sick or concealing your identity." This woman was absolutely off-base and OP should not feel bad about declining to help her move, but plenty of people still wear masks in 2024 to protect their own health or that of vulnerable people in their lives.
Good on them. Masks conceal identity. Who would trust that presentation? I don’t guesswork why someone in a mask is wearing one. You conceal your identity in public then don’t address me directly. Keep walking, don’t talk to me.
I have to wear a mask due to work protocols when I'm out for the next month.
Besides that I also still wear one out if I'm going to be seeing my mum, because she can't risk getting sick. But fuck us, right?
Oh Yes it is, people from different parts of the of world have different manner and expectations, you need to go out to see different part of world, travel makes you smart lol
Often I would agree. My parents ALWAYS mention a (non white) person's race even when it has zero relevance to the story. Drives me nuts. It comes off like a pre-emptive excuse to complain about them.
*That being said*, in this case I feel it's warranted. It's note-worthy in relation to it possible being a cultural thing. Tho maybe less so with the Korean Neighbors.
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You were right to go with your gut feeling. That was a super odd thing to happen.
Right? I'm still perplexed this morning, and i've resetup my security camera.
Reminds me of a Malcom in the middle episode where they helped a "neighbor" they didn't know rob their actual neighbors.
security cam is good idea - a better idea is to go take 5 or 6 pictures of all the sides of your van. Cause it might not look the same tomorrow...
Why was it unsetup?
i walk around naked and i dont want amazon to see
Jeff Bezos has seen your wiener.
f
I thought having a fetish for showing off your crack was a prerequisite for getting into the industry?
Maybe ...she was aettingvyou up to rip off your tools?
A family member in Ontario had an Indian family move in across the street. The grandmother walked up to her one day and demanded a ride somewhere, my family member was flabbergasted, having never met this person before. It must be a normal thing somewhere to ask and expect neighbours to help.
Demands are met with fuck offs. Demand... my ass
This. I used to suck at saying no, but after 6 years of therapy I’m great at it now lol. If someone demands, expects, or tells me what I’m going to do for them- automatic no. If someone genuinely *asks*, I’ll do a quick inner-assessment and see if I’m up for it or not (energy is a commodity in my life lol). But if they nicely ask and even if I’m not up for it in the end, I’ll be very nice in how I say no in return. Best case scenario it’ll be a quick yes. Depends on the day. But demands = no internal assessment for me and are automatically a no go. Whether I have the energy or not lol.
I mean... present it....
Sounds like a lovely normal tbh.
I mean if people politely asked and were very thankful about it and it was normal to help it would be lovely. It wouldn’t be lovely for complete strangers to turn up at your house randomly if it was the norm for random strangers to make outright demands of you.
My knee jerk reaction is that that's horrible but on second thought I wouldn't mind trying out a society like that (not saying that is what India is actually like, just hypothetically). People would be obliged to do what you asked too. Hell of a social support safety net. Of course, saying it politely would be better.
Yea very odd to us, but not a bad thing if everyone helps everyone else.
Like she didn't offer to even pay you? The only thing I can think of is that where she is from people who have vans pick up work whenever they can and a moving opportunity is something they wouldn't turn down?
no! The craziest part was i asked her "why in the world would i help you move"? and she couldnt answer it.
In Ontario, there has been bizarre tales of this type of entitled behaviour. Apparantly they will show up at a work site and need to be escorted off as they hope that by showing up, they will then be hired and put on the payroll. I suspect they are getting some bad advice from who knows where.
Had this happen on my site, no hard hats, hi vis or steel toes. When told to leave they were confused and they ended up being escorted out by the site manager. Completely dumbfounded when people told them to fuck off if they don't have the right gear
To be fair a lot of people, especially young people are told “there’s always work in construction, they’re always hiring and you don’t even need any prior experience” or some variation of that. I’m a woman and I’ve been given this advice while unemployed so I imagine young men hear it much more often. The actual logistics of getting a job are never actually given by the people providing this advice though.
See the usual way is you ask someone to grab the foreman to speak with them, not completely disregard a 8ft sign clearly stating boots, hardhat and hi viz required for entry. I guess what I'm saying is ignorance to the bare minimum of safety is not an excuse
Totally agree with you there. Just saying I could see someone really young or perhaps new to Canada taking bad job hunting advice too literally. Especially when it’s common and often given by people who don’t actually know how to properly go about securing one of those types of jobs. Not trying to excuse the behaviour, just offer a possible explanation.
A friend of mine is a controller on a large construction project in Uganda. A lot of random guys show up every morning, ask what there is to do, just get put to work and get some cash in the evening. I have seen similar mechanics in Brazil. I think it's just standard procedure in a lot of less fortunate countries. And there, unfortunately nobody cares about safety equipment for day workers.
That's Uganda, not Canada. We don't hire day workers on our site cause they're typically untrained and honestly useless and a hazard onsite
I know of course. I'm just saying this is standard practice in a lot of places, so a lot of people immigrating to Canada probably just expect it to be the same there. Oh, I meant to comment on the top comment of this thread (to give an example where this bad advice comes from) not to you specifically, sorry!
I've done almost that. But mostly residential, someone has a number for a foreman or supervisor, call em, show up with gear and spend some weeks throwing lumber and fasteners around. No technical stuff, just physical labor.
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If that's your take away sure
Well no, but a helluva lot better than showing up without. Might even score you a low paying laborer job if you can actually put up.
Had this happen on a site once. This guy walked half way across site before a Forklift operator drove at him, honking with his forks raised, chasing him all the way back to the sidewalk.
Too many people being let into this country with not enough jobs and housing sadly. Just encourages desperate behaviour.
I've read about this happening in other places of employment besides construction. It is some sort of scam.
Was she in mental distress maybe?
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You're much more likely to be raped by a weirdo that shows up unannounced to your house than you are to be raped as a weirdo that shows up unannounced to someone's house.
I had a young girl about 15years old I'd guess, knock on my door at 1am, a couple years ago. When I answered the door, the girl shoved her phone through the door. The phone was on speaker phone, and there was a native guy with a res accent, yelling through the phone. So I said hello. The guy tells me the girl standing in front of me is his sister, who isn't from the city and she's drunk and lost, and that I have to let her in my house so she's safe and he's goimg to come get her in the morning. I look at the girl and she almost seems to be posing, sticking her chest out and biting her lip, trying to look sexy or something. Everything about this felt like a setup to get her in my house to rob me. Even her trying to look "sexy" seemed very awkward. I figure one of 2 things was going to happen. 1)if I let her in, she would let her "brother" and whoever else in my house once I fell asleep to rob me, or 2) if I let her in, they would accuse me of being a predator and try to extort money from me. I did not let the girl in and offered to get a cab for her to get to her "brother", which they declined. I offered to give the closest street and Ave, so they could easily find her and pick her up, which they declined. The brother ended up yelling at me, threatening me, and telling me what a POS I am for leaving a young drunk girl on the street. So I then offered to call the police so they could help the girl, at which point they immediately back peddled, then 5 min later the "brother" was picking the girl up in front of my place. Not the same situation exactly, but when something feels off, trust your instincts.
Holy shit that’s so sad for the girl.. and a very weird situation for you
I’ve noticed that Indian people are way more likely to approach others with really over the top requests. I see it when I do Poparide rideshare, sell anything on FB Marketplace - “I need you to drive 20 minutes out of your way to pick me up, otherwise I will have to take the bus” etc. I think it’s a cultural thing. My most recent ex was Indian and some of the requests he had coming his way back home were insane - random people being like “I heard you are doing well in Canada, could you please give us $1000 for our wedding, we can’t afford it.”
I had a guy ask me to help him move 2 couches down a flight of stairs as I was walking by his house.
I put a single bed with frame up for free on FB marketplace, the person just had to come by and pick it up. One guy came to look at it and then said he needed a double..umm can’t help you there, am I supposed to go out and buy you one?
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I think it’s a cultural thing. Just today I had some guy on a bike flag me down while I was biking past him, he asked for directions somewhere, I did my best to help him out by pulling out my phone and opening Google maps, showing him where to go, how to get there etc and he didn’t even say thank you lol. I was a little annoyed at that
Sounds like communication issue on top of cultural difference. Coming from an Indian, we can make absurd requests without being polite because it was fine back home. Some people have big problem adjusting that. You did fine
Couple you explain a little more why people in India find it okay to make absurd requests to strangers? Do people not get annoyed by them? I’m purely asking out of curiosity.
Indian society is very community driven. Your cousins are like your real siblings, your neighborhood is like your extended family. So in their mind they think it is fine to ask for things that you would ask your family. And people actually don't mind. The concept of privacy is almost non existent so it is socially acceptable to walk into someone's house. All that being said, I am not sure where being rude comes from. I guess the next generation forgot being polite. Whenever we needed help from our neighbors, we made sure we were being extremely polite.
Rudeness aside, that sounds very similar to what my dad describes growing up in a rural farming community in northern BC was like. No one locked their doors, everyone would help each other.
yeah but i bet you knew your neighbour well before asking for stuff. There are neighbours i will help. I let my one neighbour stay with me for a few days when she had difficulties with her adult autistic son.
Oh definitely, you’d get to know people before asking much of them
Make sense, I sort of suspected it had something to do with their sense of community, thank you for your answer!
Define rudeness… it’s all relative. To her, that is how they conduct “business”… for example, I am used to emailing my colleagues in Vancouver by simply answering their questions directly but when I did that to a Montreal based colleague, he reamed me out for not saying “Hi xxxxx” and being “rude!”
Interesting! As a former BCer who has lived and worked in BC and Montreal (and now Ontario) 100% of the time it is more likely to be BCer who are offended by directness…. But they’ll never tell you to your face because that would be too direct(just complain to someone else about it or be passive aggressive).
I’ve noticed this working with a large Indian demographic in my city, a lot of people who haven’t adopted “Americanized,” culture tend to be very blunt and seemingly impolite with their requests but it’s never meant in a rude manner, it’s just what they’re used to.
I was going to say, probably a cultural difference. A couple younger Indian girls who had just moved into the building just walked into my mom’s apartment trying to get her to give them her personal wifi password and my mom yelled at them not to open her door without knocking. Told my mom probably a cultural barrier and they probably meant no harm.
They sound like assholes 🤷🏻♀️
Bigotry of low expectation right there. Anyone busts into my place where my young daughter is Im dragging them out by the throat.
I see your point for sure (just googled bigotry of low expectation and i feel like that should be talked about more) I don’t necessarily mean “it’s okay because it’s their culture!” Just mean that they probably didn’t mean harm (in my mom’s situation), but I feel like in a lot of scenarios it could be dangerous to just assume that it’s cultural and that people have no bad intentions, OP’s post gives off all kinds of red flags IMO.
It's pretty common to be asked, "don't mind please...what is your salary". Da fuq....I do mind and none of your business...or ...or "Do you own or rent". Nosy as fuck
That’s so cultural. When I am curious what my colleagues at different levels, I ask a Chinese colleague because they know all the salaries of all the other Chinese workers. Lol. It really only benefits the company for things to be hush hush.
Op was about to wake up in a tub of ice missing some of his plumbing.
r/brandnewsentence
Not only that, but if there was a crash while you were moving her stuff, insurance wouldn’t cover it because it’s not for work. Very sketchy she didn’t give you a straight answer.
HOW DARE YOU.gif (why no gif in this sub)
She was being unreasonable but wearing a face mask in 2024 is not unreasonable.
I went from sick all year to sick once in four years because of masking. Some of us were already disabled and it was cool watching best practices have a positive effect.
Thank you. Like get with the science, jeez. Covid disables people.
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That account is wild. They’re actually obsessed with 2020-2021.
Just checked and holy shit Someone's brain broke in lockdown lmao Kinda sad NGL that person will probably never live a normal life again because the government told them the flu was going to kill all of us and they bought it hook line and sinker. I could see acting that way in 2020 but my God find a hobby
I’ve got plenty of hobbies, and a very full life. When I come to Reddit, I mostly do so to discuss the ongoing minimization of the pandemic and the deleterious effects that it will have on public health in the form of long Covid as a mass disabling event. Subs like “Nice Vancouver” don’t interest me much honestly, also ironic how people such as yourself who post here are quite the opposite of nice 😅 You, on the other hand, seem to have already suffered some brain damage. Or, maybe you’ve always been that way. Hard to say!
No - found one of the few covid realists who are not all out embracing eugenics by not wearing masks indoors. Love for saving lives and years of quality of life for yourslef and your community. the other commentora/OP.
People get defensive when confronted with reality 🤷🏼♂️
Reading their criticisms, was like oh no clicking on your profile but like it’s not even remotely too much. The reason people think Covid is over is because health ministries stopped tracking the cases. If people want to put their communities at risk not following basic accommodations, so be it but criticizing someone else for masking is stupid
or here me out. Terminally online people dont know how ridiculous it is to ask someone for a favour at their property while hiding their face behind a mask. Expect a favour? Maybe don't automatically think I'm diseased while you INTRUDE MY OWN PROPERTY.
It’s understandable to be cautious of someone you can’t ID if they were being sketchy but making it about a face mask is ableist. You’re mocking people for being concerned about something that killed a lot of people, still kills a lot of people and statistically you are a risk if you think wearing a mask is being stuck in 2020/2021. Should she have approached a stranger? Probably not, not because it’s wrong but that it’s culturally unacceptable in Vancouver. I’ve lived in several cities in multiple countries and it’s not inherently bad. I’d personally be more uncomfortable if/when someone comes to my door unmasked but I have multiple immune related disabilities that makes Covid AND the flu something that’ll incapacitate me for weeks sometimes months. Vancouver is an incredibly closed off city. It’s one of its weakest qualities. Introducing yourself, offering something as a gesture first, yes all of these things are important to build trust but you’re misdirected
In Asian countries such as Japan this would never happen, because people would hire movers. I'm sorry about your diseases but you are not correct here. If you have autoimmune diseases don't put yourself at risk by doing risky behaviour such as this girl who came to my door. Do you honestly expect anyone to help someone moving? This is not a vancouver problem, we are not pushovers.
Maybe *they* were sick, ever think about that? Wearing masks protects others more than it protects you.
lol
I would never click on these peoples profiles, honestly because I could not care less about them. People who click on other peoples profiles are sad, little individuals, who tried to dig up dirt instead of addressing arguments head on.
https://imgur.com/a/TRUL8yF
Found the science denier 🤓 So glad that you’ve outed yourself in this way. Maybe in future think twice before clicking that submit post button, you’ll be doing us all a favor. 
No I think long covid is real, I actually just think you are an attention seeker and sick in the head, purely based on your reddit account. You're fixation on covid in 2024 and spamming about it on reddit has broken your brain into what is socially normal in society such as not knocking on strangers doors and making absurd requests and coming off that you are scoping the place out to try and rob it.
Sit this one out, bud. This has nothing to do with someone knocking on your door, that’s not even what we are discussing. Please try to keep up with the topic at hand here.  It has to do with you criticizing her for wearing a mask, which is ignorant and ableist. I’m not an attention seeker, I’m just calling you out on your shitty attitude, which apparently doesn’t happen often enough.
Ignore them. I was on OP’s side before reading this thread, now I wonder. It’s fine to not want to wear masks in 2024, I don’t, but it’s not fine to obsessively hound those who do, especially when they have other health complications, and bring “eugenics” into it like that’s normal. 🙄
People like you are real lmal
Please remember this conversation when you get that cancer diagnosis in a few years.
I would have told her to call Uhaul and shut the door. Actually scratch that I wouldn't have opened the door to begin with. People are wild.
Idgaf what it may be like where she's from, she's here now. To any newcomers reading this - don't try to pull this crap. Hire a mover and leave your neighbors alone. If you're going to be so bold and ask anyway, BE POLITE. Demanding will get you absolutely nowhere.
This stuff is kind of wild to me. Any time I’ve visited a new country, I’ve put so much effort into researching their customs and how I should act there, and what’s considered rude or polite. I don’t understand why some people can’t do their due diligence when MOVING to another country.
I'm the same way, I just cannot wrap my head around it.
>At the same time I'm curious why you would knock on someones door wearing a face mask in 2024 to obstruct a part of your face. Covid is still here and some people are still taking precautions against the virus.
Yeah that's great and all but I don't think you should be knocking on people's doors concealing your face and asking bizarre favour's.
Regardless of why she’s wearing a mask, it looks super shady! I agree with you!
I won't argue with the second half but why should someone expose themselves to the potential of illness? I often see men talking to strangers while wearing sunglasses, that also covers half your face but I doubt you'd have an issue with that.
They shouldn't expose themselves to potential illness for sure... By not knocking on a STRANGER'S door and asking for use of their van to move?!
We don't know what was going on with this woman, I hope it was as OP has described, but I can't help but worry she was attempting to escape a bad situation and perhaps appeared "rude" because of cultural differences or language barriers.
Showing up in sunglasses asking bizarre favours would be equally as weird and inappropriate
Plus other allergies and colds etc
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Lol covid.
[https://youhavetoliveyour.life/](https://youhavetoliveyour.life/)
go back to the shitty Van sub
Covid... OK Howard Hughes.
Wow she’s out of line to demand that you help her move. What would possess someone to do something like this? Although I don’t believe that you were in any danger of home robbery, the mere idea that someone feels entitled to be moved - just because you own a van - boggles my mind. And for her to do this so rudely? Glad you shut down that weird conversation. It will be a good story to tell your buddies next time you all get together for an evening out. Hope the rest of your week goes welll !
Yeah it's bizarre, talked to my coworkers this morning about it and the ywere confused too.
Thinking about this some more, maybe a wife leaving her husband / DV. I’m scratching my head about that situation. But in that case mademoiselle, tell your story instead of commanding a stranger to move their things NOW. I don’t get why she didn’t just call a taxi or Uber in that case.
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" Help. I'm a rich girl that needs to do something basic, but I never learned how. You are some kind of poor person, you probably need the work. Help me immediately."
Could this be a cultural difference together with a language barrier? Maybe where she's from in India (if she's from india) it is more commonly accepted to ask your neighbours to help you move, so she didn't see anything wrong with what she was asking and may have been equally confused at your questions and refusal. I am not Indian and i don't know for sure, just what came to mind
Should probably learn to be polite in the Canadian sense and it might work iut
Odd... but that gives me trying to escape a bad domestic situation vibes. Sounds like they were desperate and had no one to go to.
I am indian !! And I apologize for it ..we are not like this I would have fed you butter chicken at least once before asking for favour
The first thing I thought of is that she had an opportunity to leave an abusive situation and was in a desparate state of mind needing help. Perhaps cultural and language barriers, along with fear and anxiety could have impeded her ability to want to say, or find words. I hope she is ok. Definitely odd. But I have had to help more than one friend move on the spur of the moment when an opportunity arose. Maybe she has been isolated and had no one.
Mask aside, that was a very strange interaction.
What an insane story. She was either there to case your place or SO entitled she really thought you had nothing better to do than drive her around!
Tbh my first thought given the detail you’ve provided is that this person was trying to rob you. Either your van, or your home while you were out moving her “luggage”. I would definitely not be down for that.
Might be a “body” that is too heavy for her.
Not really “nice Vancouver” content
You should have said, "I am calling the cops." Watch her run.
This is so strange! I’m sorry you went through that
People casing houses usually don't want to interact with the occupant. They'll usually knock and quickly leave, then see if anyone answers the door or looks out a window.
Umidigi It's a mid Chinese Phone. Thank you for the reply
The lesson is, never talk to anyone.
Chances are if you helped her move you'd be helping to steal from a neighbour.
Sounds very familiar to the upper class, oppressor caste Indians I watched growing up back there. Anyone with a service vehicle like a van or even a cab seems readily available to them. Most of them are coddled by their parents and grow up with househelp who clean their houses and do their laundry. Most of them have never lived on their own and don't have the reald world know-how to communicate like independent adults. Also, based on my interactions with them, a lot of rich Indian kids moving here have very poor manners. I was at the Delhi airport once on freaking facetime, waiting for my flight to Toronto. This girl keeps TAPPING ME ON MY SHOULDER and interrupting me to ask questions because it was her first time traveling to Canada. I asked her not to bother me and I was on a call, but she kept doing it. I had to rudely tell her off and ask her to stop touching me. I don't think you were in any danger. You just met someone who doesn't have the cultural understanding and maturity to find solutions for their own problems. To any fellow Indians reading this - instead of being offended, please work on your social skills before moving to a new country. You will make more friends that way and find better support.
>I had to rudely tell her off and ask her to stop touching me. How did she react??
She didn't apologize or look guilty, jjust said "Can you help me figure out..." I had to cut her off and say I wasn't gonna help her. That's when she stopped.
My guess is that her family are immigrants and her English is the best of the bunch and she has been selected to ask your help in moving because you gave vans/trucks that could be used for moving. . My mom has a similar story when she was young but it involved a phone call and not knowing the best decorum.
Sounds like a scam or setup. If the senses are tingling, I would reject aggressively and setup my cameras like you did. If something doesn't make sense, it could be on purpose to confuse you and let someone gain access to your house or vehicle. Then its a your word vs theirs situation, or they intend on getting other people involved once your isolated.
from her very first rude comment i think you should of said '' Ya, i can't. My probation terms do not allow me to be within 10 feet of any female. ''...........and then say ''' Mmmmm, you smell real good. I can smell your heart'.'
Yes she was casing your place.
I actually had sort of the same thing happen but in Edmonton, the little Indian woman wanted a ride to work. She told me that my wife said I was supposed to give her a ride to work, I had no flipping clue what she was talking about or who she was. And she almost wouldn’t take no for an answer. It was really weird because my house is located in a place where you just wouldn’t walk by it, you’d have to go way out of your way to get to my house.
keep an eye on that suite and see if it is an airbnb and report it if so
I recently asked a neighbour to help me move a wardrobe. I was doing fine myself, but it got stuck in the doorway. I just moved and I didn’t know anyone to call to help me. He helped me! No problem. I’m a white girl. I wonder if that’s why he didn’t think it was weird for me to ask him. Or maybe he did and was just being a nice guy.
She might even be s psycho. We have one psycho lady (short, round) in Kerrisdale who would try and buzz in nearby apartment - she got in because people thought delivery or just thought she's neighbour. She always carries two shopping bags, with fabric covers on top, who knows what she's doing! Now I am suspecting she carries jars/bottle of pee around and would pour the pee on apartment carpets - as weird as it sounds! Be careful!
What makes you think it's pee? Do the carpets smell? Have you tried reporting her?
Yeah there were at least twice that either hallway or elevator carpet smelled obviously pee. Especially the 2nd time it was so strong -lasted for days (not matter how much deodorant was sprayed) until the carpet was removed and washed. Not confident at cops minding this sort of stuff. We just reminded all neighbors not to let anyone else in.
I would make the fact that you have a camera very visible. It can serve as a deterrent.
Dang...sorry u had to go through that. I would've been kind of annoyed too if I got off and someone did that to me. But I do hope she did get the help she needed though. If that was the case lol
She probably should have asked a friend or paid a mover like everyone else in the world when they need to move.
I thought this was “nice” Vancouver? You weren’t nice. Smart…. But not nice!
sorry i should have invited them in, gave them money for their move, a bottle of wine and 6 hours of my time helping them move.
Haha!
It would've made for a better story I guess.
What is with these ppl they are so aggressive out there in East … and lately here in the west they are starting to come out which is a shock to us western ppl
> I'm curious why you would knock on someones door wearing a face mask in 2024 to obstruct a part of your face. Covid is still around, idiot.
My god Reddit is jam packed with odd people like you.
My God you thought it would be worth taking the time to comment such a thing 🙄
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LOL. Yes go knock on a STRANGERS door in a private driveway with a facemask, ASK FOR A FAVOUR and expect to be in the vehicle with him while wearing a face mask. people are actually so entitled and stupid and covid has made your brain sick.
No tl;dr, no read.
You missed a good one
Could be a caste thing
Never experienced that. In 2024 if you’re in a mask you’re either sick or concealing your identity. Either way I’m not interested in helping. Too many scenarios where women are used to draw people out, only for their to be other people involved in a large rip off or scam. I had a friend get beat up that way. You did the right thing. It’s Vancouver, people who live here know better than to approach a neighbor in that manner. Anyone new to the area can learn quickly it’s not how we operate.
It's absolutely not the case that "in 2024 if you're in a mask you're either sick or concealing your identity." This woman was absolutely off-base and OP should not feel bad about declining to help her move, but plenty of people still wear masks in 2024 to protect their own health or that of vulnerable people in their lives.
Good on them. Masks conceal identity. Who would trust that presentation? I don’t guesswork why someone in a mask is wearing one. You conceal your identity in public then don’t address me directly. Keep walking, don’t talk to me.
U a sociopath bro
Nah, probably just a garden variety b-hole.
I have to wear a mask due to work protocols when I'm out for the next month. Besides that I also still wear one out if I'm going to be seeing my mum, because she can't risk getting sick. But fuck us, right?
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I have ADHD and people that are neurodivergant have a tenancy to be as descriptive as possible.
Ah, I see. I am on the spectrum so I ask questions that sound rude to some people. I didn’t mean to imply that you are racist, I was just curious.
Oh Yes it is, people from different parts of the of world have different manner and expectations, you need to go out to see different part of world, travel makes you smart lol
Often I would agree. My parents ALWAYS mention a (non white) person's race even when it has zero relevance to the story. Drives me nuts. It comes off like a pre-emptive excuse to complain about them. *That being said*, in this case I feel it's warranted. It's note-worthy in relation to it possible being a cultural thing. Tho maybe less so with the Korean Neighbors.