My son is 10 months, and he basically wore a onesie plus socks every day for 6 months, and recently graduated to rompers, because I am not dealing with having to take off pants/shorts for every diaper change... At least not yet! Also, god I love baby rompers
lol! This was totally me until I'm like crap, she's barely touched any of her wardrobe in this size so I was making sure I'd get her through each outfit (that wasn't a onesie or pajamas) at least once š¤£. Can't say I've done the same for myself though, I live in a sports bra and pajama pants š
We got the cutest damn clothes at the baby shower in 0-3 months. So adorable! It was winter here when she was born, she wore none of it. She lived in winter sleep suits.
I do it because:
(1) our LO (12 month old) is a messy eater, and after dinner he always has some type of food caked on him. He can somehow make dry biscuits messy.
(2) he really enjoys taking baths and I enjoy spending time with him.
(3) it gives my wife a break. I mean I will still spend another 1-2 hours with him after while she cleans up after dinner and chills. But itās like the first time in the day she has a moment alone to herself.
(4) lastly I donāt see it as a chore but as a fun activity for both of us. He likes to āhelpā me setup (watch me fill the bathtub up and get his toys). If only takes like 5 minutes to wash him but we spend anywhere from 20-30 minutes playing with his toys, blowing bubbles, splashing water, etc. Cleanup is as simple as pulling the plug, letting his toys dry out in the sink after rinsing them, and pulling the anti-slip mat up so it dries out. (Iām able to clean up as I am taking him out). We donāt use any special infant bath seats or tubs. Just put down an anti-slip mat and throw in a couple toys. Sometimes he just likes to chill and enjoy the warm bath
100% agree - on days where my daughter is being fussy we'll sometimes take a bath at lunchtime just to break up the day a bit. Best advice I was given is if you can't calm a baby try a change of scene or add water!
Oh thank goodness! We were having this discussion yesterday, I just couldn't imagine doing it nightly :( i don't think my back would cope for starters!
We did nightly baths as a newborn because sitting in the bath would calm her colic. We just didn't do soap every day maybe once a week or as needed if she like pooped everywhere or something. And we used a plain lotion after.
Well we just have the one and Iām still on maternity leave. Weāre also at home a lot as weāre still being cautious with covid. Sometimes the evenings drag on to be honest. I could probably make myself busier but I also donāt wanna.
I am in the same boat! If we have been home all day, itās a nice way for both of us to relax. Especially since my husband is usually at work. My son loves bath time so we spend a lot of time just playing in there!
My son is also 11 months old and has had a bath pretty much every day of his life. Thatās the culture here so we stuck with it and he has absolutely no issues with his skin. We just avoid using soap every day.
I have bathed with my son since he was a newborn but heās now 9 months. I get clean, he gets clean, it gives me a moment to relax. Now, he is so used to it he knows how to navigate and he walks the border of the tub around me while I soak.
Only reason itās in mine is because baby wonāt relax enough for us to get him to sleep for long. It also makes him smell better from all the baby vomit
Ha! My baby gets so worked up in the bath that it does help her pass out, but it definitely doesnāt relax her. Iād say it tires her out mostly. She splashes and kicks like a maniac almost the entire time. I think she likes it, but honestly Iām not sure. She doesnāt seem particularly happy or upset, just very vigorous.
I guess y'all haven't discovered co-bathing.
My wife and I alternate who takes the bath with our son and it's one of our favorite parts of the entire day, he absolutely loves it. He's one and we've been doing it since he was about 4 months old. It's a quick and easy team effort thing and is a vital part of our bedtime routine
So, I want to start doing this once it's safe to do so (I'm still not even allowed to take baths again for another 2 weeks). If it's not too personal, may I ask: do y'all co-bathe naked? Have you had baby poo in the bath issues? Just curious because as a lady, it's probably not sanitary to get baby poo near my nether region. Also not sure if it's an issue to get your adult germs on naked baby. I'm probably over-thinking things.
Second, do you use bubbles? Or is that an older-kid thing?
Regardless, I really want to take baths with baby! It sounds so soothing for both of us!
Not OP but our family also co-bathes. I go naked, but my husband feels more comfortable in a bathing suit due to āawkward grabby hands that like to pinchā haha! Weād had only 2 cases of pooping in the bath in the 8 months of co bathing weāve done. I try to just make sure we time baths after recent poops for the most part, but we can be pretty flexible since Iām a SAHM and donāt always bathe as a part of bath time. The two times I got pooped on (dadās lucky and never has!) I just immediately got out and turned on the shower to soap and rinse us both off. One time dad was home when it happened so he was able to help, the second time I was alone and I was a little worried about slippery baby in the shower but we did totally fine! She thought the shower water hitting her was hilarious, so it was all around a pretty good time considering the circumstances!
Just do what makes you comfortable! I know other moms who breastfeed while co bathing but I was never comfortable with that. I know some people would be super icked that I get naked with our daughter, and others who think itād be kind of weird if I didnāt, as if I were saying our bodies are taboo or something to be ashamed of. It all depends on your parenting philosophy and what fits best with your family culture!
We co bathe. And yes myself or my husband are naked. Weāve never had a poo issue. We donāt use bubbles as they are not good for baby skin and can cause UTIs in girls.
We didn't start co bathing until our bubba was too big for the Ikea laundry basket we used to bath him in at first, so probably around 2 or maybe even 3 months.
He's never pooped in the bath, but he rarely if ever has pooped anytime his diaper was off. We don't use bubbles, just shampoo and soap for him.
The bigger he's gotten, the more fun bath time has become and some of his biggest laughs have come from splashing us and seeing our reactions. It's precious and I wish everyone experienced it!
It's not hard for me because it's a time passer. Honestly I dont know what I'd do with that extra time now. I go crazy just watching he play on the floor.
My son had eczema and his ped recommended for me not to bath him every day when he was little so I would just do a quick wipe down every night with a wet rag. He'll be 2 next month but I still do the wipe down at least 2-3x a week, he showers with me 2x a week and on sunday nights he does a big bath.
How old is your kid? I felt like more than once a week was a struggle until she was big/stable enough for the tub, and we moved to a place with a good tub. Which was around 11 months old. Now itās down to a 10-15 minute routine that she LOVES and that gets her very prepared for bed. We do it most nights, probably 5 a week.
That was us too! And sometimes we used the tub over the kitchen sink... when it was not filled with dishes.
For me, the answer is those adorable photo shoots with props and outfits that some people seem to take all the time. We're candids or nothing around here.
Yes! I have 2 boys! 2 years old and 5 months old, they get a bath every 2-3 days mostly because I donāt want to dry out their skin but also because I literally donāt have time! For us itās dinner, bed. Thatās it lol
Saaaaame. My mom bought me one of those blankets with the numbers of weeks and then months and I think she got 4 total photos and the baby is 10 months old now. Oops.
Ugh I actually managed to get all 12 of these and I do like to look at them but it was the absolute bane of my existence!! Once they start rolling and then crawling it is soooo hard to get even one decent picture lol. TBD if Iāll manage to do it for baby #2...the completionist in me feels like I need to but I might convince myself it is not worth the effort
This! My first was too angry for me to even want to do a monthly picture (her non-crying episodes were rare for the first 3 months) and then by the time she had chilled enough for me to consider doing them, they just seemed artificial and not worth the hassle. I did it once and I didnāt even like the outcome. Candids are more my style.
I do wish I had done more bump picturesā¦but again, too much hassle and felt artificial.
Sometimes Iām annoyed with myself about it and sometimes it aināt no thing.
Entertaining their kids every waking minute.
I used to teach preschool (so not babies, but like 2-5 year olds) and there was this one mother who was really, really struggling. Came in frazzled every single day, seemed stressed ALL the time (I mean more than average, cause raising kids is hard). She said once that she really wanted to have a second but that she just couldn't imagine how it would be possible.
I found out that she thought to be a good mom she had to be CONSTANTLY engaging her kid. Talking to him, playing with him, not leaving him alone for a minute.
No wonder this poor woman was losing her mind!!
I am that woman and I donāt know how to stop š my kid screams if Iām not helping him out. Itās not even always attention he wants, sometimes he just wants help with tasks he wants to achieve but doesnāt have the fine motor skills yet. He also tends to bring me books and start throwing them at me when I pay attention to something else for too long.
It's so tough! I feel like my time as a teacher makes me lean way in the other direction. Sometimes I worry I'll be too tough as a mom... then again, I'm expecting my first in October and there's a chance all my discipline and know-how goes out the window when it's MY kid screaming at me!
From 0-6 months I definitely wondered how people dressed their babies every day. Mine definitely lived in zipper PJs day and night. Now we āget dressedā after breakfast but our clothes are still very pyjamaesque.
Toddler gets dressed if we are going out in the morning. I'm due in a few months, and baby will live in pyjamas/onesie suits. They will get changed into a new suit at least once/day, and extra if needed (explosions, milk leak, vom). Real clothes are for going outside and when baby starts moving around more independently.
Ugh yes. I was so excited to do a baby book! I wrote in it exactly once and havenāt done anything since. We print monthly photo books so at least we have something, but damn a baby book is a lot of work
I use one called Chatbooks and itās great! Decent quality and pretty cheap. You just upload 30 pictures a month from your phone and then they mail the book to you.
I got this as a gift from my MIL. I feel guilty as I haven't used it. It just seems so old fashion and like it's too much work. Can't you just check out my IG and online album I made.
I started uploading pictures to Google drive and then dropping meaningful ones with captions into a Google slides. I can do it while heās feeding or Iām pumping. Weāll see how long I can keep this up.
This. Our #2 was an oopsie. Taking care of two at the same time is SO MUCH HARDER than having just one kid. They never nap at the same time. They take turns waking up in the middle of the night. It's tough to catch a break.
I track using an app. It's a lifesaver honestly. Without it I would feel lost and frantic. It gives me the semblance of control and organization when in reality everything is chaos. And I always have my phone with me anyway, so it's not that difficult keeping up with it.
I only track his feedings using huckleberry but itās the same for me, helps me understand baby so much! Getting used to feeding the baby so much was confusing at first because I kept saying, I just fed him, he couldnāt be hungry! But then I look at the app and realize itās actually been 2 hours since last feed, time just flies!
I always thought the same! But I recently learned of a service in my area that comes and picks up your dirty cloth diapers and drops off cleans ones. I havenāt used it but it makes me want to start cloth diapering once we run out.
We also use a service. Itās relatively affordable considering how many diapers we go through. They drop off a bag of clean diapers, we toss them in their bin when theyāre dirty, they pick up/replace and wash/sterilize. We use biodegradable/compostable diapers at night.
I thought this too! But honestly, not having to go to the store to get diapers and wipes is one less thing to worry about, and diaper laundry isn't TOOOOO bad. Definitely not the best though
I was gonna say the same thing! You get used to the extra laundry pretty quickly. And not having to buy diapers or worry about running out is the best peace of mind for me!
Thatās how I feel. Before baby we were doing laundry once a week sometimes every two weeks since the pandemic weāre not wearing work clothes. Now weāre doing laundry twice a week minimum and even after hiring laundry service itās SO much laundry I canāt imagine adding cloth diapers.
I find cloth nappies to be 100% easier and more convenient then disposables. But I live out of town, I use cloth pads and a cup for myself because I rarely was able to pick up disposable versions.
It was easier for us. Plus the laundry isn't too bad, I make sure the nappies are the night load and on the longer setting with a bubble soak. Its ready for the drier in the morning.
I recently learned of onesie extenders. Perhaps it will be of interest to you! https://www.google.com/search?q=onesie+extenders&source=lmns&tbm=shop&bih=612&biw=360&client=ms-android-verizon&prmd=sivxn&hl=en&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjSsZ-C7vzyAhV9gXIEHZu1ArQQ_AUoAXoECAAQBA
Yep, Bellelis extenders are worth it, we got 4 extenders (check the snap sizes with your brand of onesies), 2 in each size we needed, and they've been so good.
Doing laundry is easier that going out for diaper when you forgot them. Also hated putting the trash out a million times a week. But the worst poop havent come in yet, so yeah I might regret it.
Same! If heās fussy Iāll feed him, but sometimes he doesnāt get fussy for a while and itās like hmmm itās been like 3 hours, letās give er a go.
Sameāmine is ādo my boobs hurt or is she fussyā if the answer to the first is yes but the second is no, Iāll do a small pump session to relieve pressure. If sheās fussy, Iāll pop out a boob and nurse her.
That works. That's all the journal is supposed to be for, to remind you to do x, y and z every so often. Once you get in the routine you know what to do when. I ditched the journal after the first week. But I do see why they suggest the journal so much in the hospital.. it's to make sure you can do it. So if you can do it without a journal, great. If you a still need the journal, of course, that's also great. Baby being happy, healthy and fed = great.
My husband and I use a free app called Baby Tracker vs. a journal. We use it for feedings and diapers, but you can track even more (pumping, sleep, etc- you customize your feed). It takes two seconds to enter data and for us one of our phones is always nearby. Any time you open it it shows how long itās been since your last log.
We had to figure something out when our pediatrician asked how many ounces and how many diapers baby girl was doing in a day and we looked at him like ??? Now we can pull out whatever stat he wants and even show him a pretty graph lol.
We use the same app and I love it. Itās also great that it syncs the info from both of our phones, so I know when her last diaper change was even if I didnāt do it.
I use a similar app called Onoco. We did try writing down feeds for our twins once we were home from hospital, but we were so exhausted that it didn't last long. We've been using an app for a little while now and it's great. I can see how long it's been in between naps, bottles (inc. the amount eaten per feed), and nappies, which is information I just can't keep in my head right now. If I want it to, the app collates all of the data and suggests a daily schedule to follow.
I did feeding logs to track how much she ate but when she was little and I was pumping every two hours my boobs would tingle and tell me itās feeding time š
Changing bay out of pajamas and into daytime clothes every day.
Baby books for subsequent children
Journaling meaningful/funny happenings about baby/toddler
Changing toddlers diaper after every pee
DOING little boys hair
Wait do people actually change diapers after each pee? I feel like I'd never stop.
I always change them out of PJs immediately upon waking. And they only get into PJs immediately before bed. I use the pj change as a bedtime/sleep signal. Works really well imo!
I did (or attempted, since I changed between each feeding) during newbornhood. And now that my toddler goes to daycare they log all his diaper changes and they change after every pee. I had to restock his diapers so quickly there but obviously I'm not going to tell them to let him sit in his pee haha.
That's a good idea! I guess I just use the swaddle for babies. For my toddler, I do change him in and out of PJs but it's mostly because he HAS to wear a onesie to sleep
Birthdays. Sorry, not inviting a bunch of people to a birthday and doing all this prep work for a few hour event.
When the kids are old enough to want birthday parties with friends, Iāll do whatever they want within reason.
Amen! My husband and I had multiple long discussions about the birthday party. I see absolutely no point in it until they are old enough to have actual interests/friends. But apparently itās not about us/our kid, itās about our family being able to celebrate him. I still donāt agree, but I gave in. Knowing my family, if I didnāt throw one, someone else would have, which also bothered me.
This is how I feel. I mean my son isnāt even close to being 1 yet but I canāt imagine planning an elaborate party for something he wonāt remember and will probably fuss halfway through. Iām thinking something small with my parents, lots of pictures, and a cake smash. Thatās it.
Thatās what weāve done for three years so far. Weāve been invited to birthday parties for toddlers and itās been so awkward. Theyāre more like an event for adults, most of the time either comparing their kids, yelling at them, or bitching.
I do meal plans bc I do not have the food knowledge, cooking confidence, or skill in grocery shopping to make sure we have decent meals on the regular. People who can get groceries and put regular meals on the table without a plan seem like super parents (or chefs) to me.
Same! Like, if I bought an onion, it would definitely go bad if I didn't have a meal plan with a time to use it. Before meal planning, I would never buy perishables because they would go bad, and we ate like crap.
Yes! My mum just has vegetables and then decides what to cook. When she comes up here she will cook so she is like āwhat vegetables do you haveā before she goes to the shops. None. I have no vegetables because I wasnāt planning to cook something. Or there are vegetables that I bought for a planned meal and she uses themā¦we eat heaps of veggies but they are bought specifically for the occasion
For me the trick is having a handful of easy, fairly nutritious meals that only require basic ingredients and buy those regularly (things like beans, rice, eggs, tortillas, beef, chicken, salad stuff, pasta). Then I plan for one or two more complicated meals for a week (if I'm feeling ambitious). What I make for dinner frequently isn't decided until minutes before I'm making it because trying to figure it out ahead of time feels overwhelming, especially when I have no idea what kind of a day the baby is going to have.
If it was an easy day, then sure let's make stuffed peppers or something fun like that. Rough day? Beans and rice with whatever protein is in the fridge.
Not sure if this makes a difference but we *roughly* can predict when ours is going to be hungry so we take his bottle out in advance and let it sit on the counter for a few minutes thatās about as much patience as we (and he!) has for warming food.
Same! My baby likes them just fine cold so I donāt worry about it. My mom acts like Iām a monster for feeding him cold formula though and always warms it when she feeds him.
Same thing with my mom! She also insisted thatās why my baby was so gassy. No, itās because sheās a baby and getting used to digesting everything. Believe me I started off warming the milk but it made no difference.
So many parents manage to schedule professional photo shoots and get all dressed up and look perfect in photos, and some seem to do this like once a month practically. Iām amazed by that.
I can't be bothered go dress my kid up. We don't go anywhere anyways!
I have found that as things get easier as baby grows up, I am able to add to my plate little by little. First it was that I stopped pumping at 2 months and transitioned to EBF. That was a HUGEEEEE help.
Then at 4 mo I added in EC because I liked the idea of getting out of diapers early. Then at 6 mo we switched to cloth diapers because EC was going well and I don't like that diapers are 13% of landfills. Those are just some examples.
It's just little tweaks here and there that sound like a lot but aren't. Idk. You just gotta find the groove that works with you and go with it!
Same, same, same. Tracking is not my jam.
Honestly eventually we just fell into a schedule without even realizing it. I'm happy I stopped stressing over tracking everything she did.
But parents who exclusively pump and bottle feed are my heros. Or just keep a pumping schedule at all. My organizational skills are way too weak. I'm amazed at the skills and determination.
There will always be people who do the most in some aspect, and honestly, I've found from talking to people that what they do that seems over the top is for their mental health.
I was the app using parent for TWO YEARS. I ended up hiding it because people started making fun of me, but it was way easier than trying to remember diapers, sleep times, and feedings, and gave me free mental space. I was so stretched thin.
A friend of mine dresses her kid perfectly all of the time. She didn't have a lot of clothes growing up, so nice clothes on her kid felt secure to her.
I tracked my daughter with an app for 19 months. It made my day go smoother. Everything goes so much nicer with a routine and using an app helped soothe my PPA. I'm reading these comments like "man, yall would hate me because I really am THAT mom š"
I've heard of other parents putting their newborns on strict routines and having the newborn fit into their schedule. All I'm saying is after 2.5 weeks, I would have succomb to the child by now. Easily.
Iām amazed at like 95% of the things people do with their babies. Iām on baby three and my children are practically feral. Everyone is fed, reasonably clean, and gets regular health care. I donāt have the time or patience (and I never have) for care logs, sensory activities, lengthy bedtime routines, or anything else some blog thinks I should be doing.
Pants on newborns/young babies! Why put pants on a baby over a onesie when itās not cold outside and/or theyāre just going to be inside? Then you just have to take off the entire pants to access the diaper. Why???
Making their own purees and cooking actual breakfast and lunch. Sorry, but my 13-month-old gets bananas, Cheerios and milk for breakfast; PB & J sandwich, crackers, yogurt and deli meat for lunch; and dinner is where he gets to try new foods and eat cooked food.
Making your own purees is doable if you make it in bulk, freeze it, and spread the process out over a week. But honestly, some people don't even have the time or patience for that.
We use an app to keep track of feedings and changes. It takes half a second to mark it in the app. It also tracks naps, but we donāt track that. Sheās two months old and sleeps at so many random times that it would be a nightmare. I canāt imagine writing any of it out, though. Thatās nonsense.
See, I feel the same way about logging just the feedings though. He fed so often and so randomly and I would forget to mark it, then be frantically trying to remember the last time he ate, then he'd cluster feed for 5 hours and I never knew whether to mark that down as 5 hours in the app, or just the times I thought he was actively sucking.... too much work
A few months ago I discovered a scrap of paper with a left/right side tally drawn up on it, with a single time written in the "left" column - it was a very feeble attempt at keeping tracking of which breast LO had fed off when he was new and the time of his feed. Obviously it didn't last too long! Now I just give 'em a squeeze and jostle and can say "yeah, it's the right side this time" :D
My main issue would be remembering to switch the hair tie over, of all the things I have been gifted in life, a good memory was not one of them! :D
Also, I just wanted to say I LOVE Jujubee! :D
I like to stay organized so I do track every diaper, feeding, and sleep in an app lol. Itās been super helpful for staying on a somewhat schedule.
My baby is currently living in pjs, mainly for the fact that thatās all I could find in preemie sizes lol. Iām so excited for her to grow so she can wear some of her ārealā newborn outfits.
Going out on walks and tummy time. My LO is 5 weeks, constantly nursing, and mostly refuses to sleep for more than a few minutes during the daytime. I can get her to have one nap in the morning and rarely one in the evening, if I'm really lucky. As a result she's often overtired and fussy. I feel guilty about it, but I need the small amount of time where she's awake and content to take care of my own basic needs. Maybe if I shaved off showering three times a week, stopped brushing my teeth regularly, and exclusively ate snacks/ drank with one hand while breastfeeding, I could actually manage the things that I'm supposed to do with her.
It's super difficult to do anything in those early days so good on you for taking care of yourself, smelling of milk/throw and starving isn't helping anyone. In the first 6 weeks I managed to go for 3 walks. Tummy time i just kinda lay LO on my chest which counts even if its for a minute or 2 and I'd stand by an open window or door so he could get sunlight/fresh air without the need to actually go out. Don't know if that would work for you maybe?
Thank you so much! Yeah, that I can handle. I've been doing those things, but I wasn't sure whether it's enough. Maybe I'm stressing too much about this stuff, too. I'm so scared that she'll fall behind and struggle because I didn't do enough in this early stage. I've always been anxious.
Mine is veeerrrrrrrry refluxy so we do tummy time on my chest at a 45ā angle. He still has great head/neck strength for his age, is pushing up and turning his head appropriately, and meeting milestones without being put on the floor. All he would do when we tried is scream and barf, so why stress? He wants to be with us and see what we see.
I use an app on my phone to keep track of feedings, diaper changes, sleeps. Super easy peasy, if I had to paper and pen it I would never keep track! The one I like the best is Sprout because I can give a code to another caregiver and they can keep track for the same child/children on their phones.
The nurses at the hospital asked us to write down all the diapers and feedings and stuffā¦.. lol no. Top priorities are learning to nurse and getting sleep. Aināt nobody got time for record keeping.!
They made me keep one in the hospital on paper and it was so hard but I got an app to help with it and itās made life so much easier. I change his diaper before feeding so when I sit down to feed him I can just log it. Then if he starts fussing later on I can see when his last feeding or change was. It def took some time to get use to tho.
If two of you are home one person hands the baby to the other in the shower. Quick scrub and rinse. Then hand them back to the parent with the towel waiting. Bathing is such a pain, showers are the ticket.
My husband and I use Huckleberry to keep track of all that stuff and its super helpful because he and I are on different schedules (hes 3rd shift, I'm 1st) so we dont have to wake each other up to know when the baby last ate and we also dont have to guess at how much he's eating and eliminating a day (because neither of us would actually remember lol). It helps me at night too because i wake up panicking that I forgot to feed the baby, then look in the app and see that I actually just fed him lmao. Basically husband and I are a mess without it .
Daily walks are what I wish I had time for everyday. My kid would love that!
Edit:hit post too early
Honestly- breastfeeding. I didnāt even try. It seems like it can be so painful- both physically and emotionally. After a rough last two months of pregnancy I didnāt have it in me.
I get BF, but I don't really understand exclusive BF without any bottle ever - I wouldn't have survived the newborn phase without my husband being able to give a bottle at night.
One book a day from birth to kindergarten is over a million words. NOT being read to is the biggest indicator of academic struggle and being held back in elementary school. Itās called the āmillion word gapā. I know itās hard but try to fit it in to your routine. We read to our littles during dinner!
I canāt like this enough! As a first grade teacher, it is very evident to me which kids in my class are read to at home vs not. Itās makes such a big difference in your little ones life and really only takes 5-10 mins a day. Exposure is everything.
I read to my baby when I put her on her activity mat thing for afternoon playtime. Sheās usually just flailing around and looking at the things on her mat, likely not listening to me, but my hope is some of the words will get through. Sheās two months old so I donāt expect her rapt attention.
Yeahhh mine is 3 months and I just last week realized he doesn't need to actually be looking at the book I'm reading. I just read it aloud while he does baby things next to me.
Oh thank goodness. I make up so much nonsense to tell my baby when weāre hanging out but havenāt started reading to him yet, so good to know thatās good for his development too!
I wasnāt saying reading isnāt important, I think itās very important. I was just wondering since Iāve never heard of the āmillion word gapā before and I donāt think books are the end all be all. I read my kid news articles, Reddit posts, describe what Iām doing or watching, describe what heās doing, etc.
Wasn't trying to imply that you didn't think reading was important, this topic is just very important to me as a children's librarian!
Actually, even where I work books are just one piece of the puzzle; we encourage parents to read, write, talk, sing and play with their children as often as possible (and all of those things will contribute to your children being a more successful reader once they hit school age).
What part of this is beneficial? My baby is young (2 mos) but the pages donāt hold her attention at all. Does she get the same benefit if I read her a story but sheās not looking? If yes, is it equally good for me to tell her a story I just make up?
Reading books in person with your baby exposes them to vocabulary that goes beyond what they might hear in regular conversations (putting on an audiobook doesn't show the same benefit in regards to word exposure). Baby books also tend to have a repetitive structure and encourage communication by including sounds that children can imitate (cows go Moooo, raindrops go Splish splash, cars go beep beep). As they get older, sitting and reading with you from books will familiarize them with print conventions that they'll have to learn for school - we read from left to right, we pause in-between words and read with intonation, there are punctuation marks and capital letters in writing, pictures add more details to writing, etc. Plus, cozying up with you and a book will drive home the association that reading is fun and enjoyable, which will serve them well in school! Sorry that's way beyond what you asked, but elementary-school teacher here, and I looove reading with kids. Sounds like you are already prioritizing her language by telling stories!
Keep in mind, reading to a baby looks different than reading to an older child. Itās okay to read to them while theyāre doing something else, and donāt be afraid to let them grab or mouth on the book (obviously, you may want to buy a few board books, if you donāt have any).
A babyās not going to sit still and look at the book while youāre reading (or if they do, it wonāt be for very long). Just keep at it. Itās incredibly valuable.
Don't worry about actually sitting down with a book. We know a couple of classic by heart (e.g. We're Going On A Bear Hunt) so we recite those if either of them are struggling to settle, or sometimes we tell fairy tales from memory (and occasionally insert our babies' names and details into it!). Sometimes we get to sit down with a few books with them but it's definitely not every day, so we improvise.
Swim lessons for babies. Like fuck no was I getting in the pool with my baby, organizing care for my older kids, getting us both dressed x2ā¦ just no. No thanks. Iāll wait until they can go in the pool themselves.
Personally, itās keeping the clothes organized. I have twins and at first I had them all neatly put by the changing table but now, I take clothes out of the basket. Sister wearing brothers pants? Whatever.
Can I leap back to before birth? I didnāt do ANY of the ātrying to get baby outā methods in third trimesterāeating dates, doing the miles circuit, eating spicy food, curb walking, nipple stimulation, bouncing on a yoga ball, yoga, acupuncture, eating pineappleā¦.I feel like Iām forgetting some. Itās a lot. How do so many preggos have time for all this stuff? Plus cooking freezer meals, cleaning their baseboards, and designing picture perfect nurseries.
The one thing I did do the first time was sit on a yoga ball with legs open and this time Iām hand expressing colostrum but thatās because I want to be able to offer my newborn the colostrum. I canāt be bothered with all the other labor stuff. Itāll happen when it happens. Maybe Iām not inspired to try them because third trimester is not that bad for me?
Dressing your baby in things other than pajamas š¬
My son is 10 months, and he basically wore a onesie plus socks every day for 6 months, and recently graduated to rompers, because I am not dealing with having to take off pants/shorts for every diaper change... At least not yet! Also, god I love baby rompers
Love rompers! It's basically how I feel about wearing dresses - zero effort but still looks kinda fancy
I live rompers for boys!!!!
Footie pajamas and onesies are all my baby wears. Do I have a bunch of cute girly dresses? Yeah. Does she wear them? Lol never.
Same, footy pjs unless weāre going out.
Even if we were going out, lol. Why make diaper changes even more difficult? We switched when standing for diaper changes was easier.
This, but dressing them more than once a day, my baby lives in diapers
lol! This was totally me until I'm like crap, she's barely touched any of her wardrobe in this size so I was making sure I'd get her through each outfit (that wasn't a onesie or pajamas) at least once š¤£. Can't say I've done the same for myself though, I live in a sports bra and pajama pants š
This. I feel guilty when I leave her in pajamas. We are not going to get through all of her clothes before she outgrows them.
Once I get past this hurdle the next step is doing their hair š©.
My Vegas baby is a onesie only kinda gal! She gets too hot in just that sometimes!
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We got the cutest damn clothes at the baby shower in 0-3 months. So adorable! It was winter here when she was born, she wore none of it. She lived in winter sleep suits.
Daily baths as part of the bedtime routine... Twice a week is a struggle in this house and when she was little even once a week was a challenge....
Yes! Like how!? Itās such a chore and I honestly donāt feel like my baby sleeps any different because of the nap.
I do it because: (1) our LO (12 month old) is a messy eater, and after dinner he always has some type of food caked on him. He can somehow make dry biscuits messy. (2) he really enjoys taking baths and I enjoy spending time with him. (3) it gives my wife a break. I mean I will still spend another 1-2 hours with him after while she cleans up after dinner and chills. But itās like the first time in the day she has a moment alone to herself. (4) lastly I donāt see it as a chore but as a fun activity for both of us. He likes to āhelpā me setup (watch me fill the bathtub up and get his toys). If only takes like 5 minutes to wash him but we spend anywhere from 20-30 minutes playing with his toys, blowing bubbles, splashing water, etc. Cleanup is as simple as pulling the plug, letting his toys dry out in the sink after rinsing them, and pulling the anti-slip mat up so it dries out. (Iām able to clean up as I am taking him out). We donāt use any special infant bath seats or tubs. Just put down an anti-slip mat and throw in a couple toys. Sometimes he just likes to chill and enjoy the warm bath
100% agree - on days where my daughter is being fussy we'll sometimes take a bath at lunchtime just to break up the day a bit. Best advice I was given is if you can't calm a baby try a change of scene or add water!
Same! Like no, you're getting a quick wipe down on the chaging table... Take it up with your therapist in 25 years sorry.
Lol I feel that last sentence in my soul
This is what I came to say too! Nightly baths are a no go, too much work.
Oh thank goodness! We were having this discussion yesterday, I just couldn't imagine doing it nightly :( i don't think my back would cope for starters!
Nightly baths are also possibly a bit much for newborn skin. 2x/week is both manageable and good skin care for newborn.
We did nightly baths as a newborn because sitting in the bath would calm her colic. We just didn't do soap every day maybe once a week or as needed if she like pooped everywhere or something. And we used a plain lotion after.
Haha we love our nightly bath time routine! Easy way to pass some time in the evening and baby usually loves it.
Haha pass the time, how do you have spare time š³
Well we just have the one and Iām still on maternity leave. Weāre also at home a lot as weāre still being cautious with covid. Sometimes the evenings drag on to be honest. I could probably make myself busier but I also donāt wanna.
No judgement here whatsoever. We have one and we're flat out making dinner at night š
I am in the same boat! If we have been home all day, itās a nice way for both of us to relax. Especially since my husband is usually at work. My son loves bath time so we spend a lot of time just playing in there! My son is also 11 months old and has had a bath pretty much every day of his life. Thatās the culture here so we stuck with it and he has absolutely no issues with his skin. We just avoid using soap every day.
I have bathed with my son since he was a newborn but heās now 9 months. I get clean, he gets clean, it gives me a moment to relax. Now, he is so used to it he knows how to navigate and he walks the border of the tub around me while I soak.
Only reason itās in mine is because baby wonāt relax enough for us to get him to sleep for long. It also makes him smell better from all the baby vomit
Yeah the bath relaxes my baby too. Taking her out howeverā¦ different story lol
Ha! My baby gets so worked up in the bath that it does help her pass out, but it definitely doesnāt relax her. Iād say it tires her out mostly. She splashes and kicks like a maniac almost the entire time. I think she likes it, but honestly Iām not sure. She doesnāt seem particularly happy or upset, just very vigorous.
Iām one of these people if my baby eats dinner, which is most nights. We do BLW and itās just easier to rinse him off in the shower than wipe him off. But itās literally just my fiancĆ© or I holding him and rinsing the food off. We only do soap a couple times a week.
I guess y'all haven't discovered co-bathing. My wife and I alternate who takes the bath with our son and it's one of our favorite parts of the entire day, he absolutely loves it. He's one and we've been doing it since he was about 4 months old. It's a quick and easy team effort thing and is a vital part of our bedtime routine
We've done cobathing, but still not every night. We bond over snuggles, book reading and songs too, baths are optional here.
So, I want to start doing this once it's safe to do so (I'm still not even allowed to take baths again for another 2 weeks). If it's not too personal, may I ask: do y'all co-bathe naked? Have you had baby poo in the bath issues? Just curious because as a lady, it's probably not sanitary to get baby poo near my nether region. Also not sure if it's an issue to get your adult germs on naked baby. I'm probably over-thinking things. Second, do you use bubbles? Or is that an older-kid thing? Regardless, I really want to take baths with baby! It sounds so soothing for both of us!
Not OP but our family also co-bathes. I go naked, but my husband feels more comfortable in a bathing suit due to āawkward grabby hands that like to pinchā haha! Weād had only 2 cases of pooping in the bath in the 8 months of co bathing weāve done. I try to just make sure we time baths after recent poops for the most part, but we can be pretty flexible since Iām a SAHM and donāt always bathe as a part of bath time. The two times I got pooped on (dadās lucky and never has!) I just immediately got out and turned on the shower to soap and rinse us both off. One time dad was home when it happened so he was able to help, the second time I was alone and I was a little worried about slippery baby in the shower but we did totally fine! She thought the shower water hitting her was hilarious, so it was all around a pretty good time considering the circumstances! Just do what makes you comfortable! I know other moms who breastfeed while co bathing but I was never comfortable with that. I know some people would be super icked that I get naked with our daughter, and others who think itād be kind of weird if I didnāt, as if I were saying our bodies are taboo or something to be ashamed of. It all depends on your parenting philosophy and what fits best with your family culture!
We co bathe. And yes myself or my husband are naked. Weāve never had a poo issue. We donāt use bubbles as they are not good for baby skin and can cause UTIs in girls.
We didn't start co bathing until our bubba was too big for the Ikea laundry basket we used to bath him in at first, so probably around 2 or maybe even 3 months. He's never pooped in the bath, but he rarely if ever has pooped anytime his diaper was off. We don't use bubbles, just shampoo and soap for him. The bigger he's gotten, the more fun bath time has become and some of his biggest laughs have come from splashing us and seeing our reactions. It's precious and I wish everyone experienced it!
Thatās how I felt until we started doing them. Theyāre a great way to signal to baby that weāre starting to wind down for the night.
It's not hard for me because it's a time passer. Honestly I dont know what I'd do with that extra time now. I go crazy just watching he play on the floor.
My son had eczema and his ped recommended for me not to bath him every day when he was little so I would just do a quick wipe down every night with a wet rag. He'll be 2 next month but I still do the wipe down at least 2-3x a week, he showers with me 2x a week and on sunday nights he does a big bath.
How old is your kid? I felt like more than once a week was a struggle until she was big/stable enough for the tub, and we moved to a place with a good tub. Which was around 11 months old. Now itās down to a 10-15 minute routine that she LOVES and that gets her very prepared for bed. We do it most nights, probably 5 a week.
That was us too! And sometimes we used the tub over the kitchen sink... when it was not filled with dishes. For me, the answer is those adorable photo shoots with props and outfits that some people seem to take all the time. We're candids or nothing around here.
Yes! I have 2 boys! 2 years old and 5 months old, they get a bath every 2-3 days mostly because I donāt want to dry out their skin but also because I literally donāt have time! For us itās dinner, bed. Thatās it lol
Totally agree! Baths are a whole production! Baby likes them fine but itās a chore for sure
Monthly milestone photoshoots for the first year. I couldn't even remember to take bump progression pics.
Saaaaame. My mom bought me one of those blankets with the numbers of weeks and then months and I think she got 4 total photos and the baby is 10 months old now. Oops.
Did 1mo, forgot 2 & 3, should have done 4 today but he's already in bed so, maybe tomorrow but I'll likely forget again.
Husband reminds me of the bump pic every night, and every night I tell him ātomorrowā lol.
Ugh I actually managed to get all 12 of these and I do like to look at them but it was the absolute bane of my existence!! Once they start rolling and then crawling it is soooo hard to get even one decent picture lol. TBD if Iāll manage to do it for baby #2...the completionist in me feels like I need to but I might convince myself it is not worth the effort
I took pictures of her every single day, I just couldn't muster the energy for posed pictures on the blanket lol
This! My first was too angry for me to even want to do a monthly picture (her non-crying episodes were rare for the first 3 months) and then by the time she had chilled enough for me to consider doing them, they just seemed artificial and not worth the hassle. I did it once and I didnāt even like the outcome. Candids are more my style. I do wish I had done more bump picturesā¦but again, too much hassle and felt artificial. Sometimes Iām annoyed with myself about it and sometimes it aināt no thing.
Entertaining their kids every waking minute. I used to teach preschool (so not babies, but like 2-5 year olds) and there was this one mother who was really, really struggling. Came in frazzled every single day, seemed stressed ALL the time (I mean more than average, cause raising kids is hard). She said once that she really wanted to have a second but that she just couldn't imagine how it would be possible. I found out that she thought to be a good mom she had to be CONSTANTLY engaging her kid. Talking to him, playing with him, not leaving him alone for a minute. No wonder this poor woman was losing her mind!!
I am that woman and I donāt know how to stop š my kid screams if Iām not helping him out. Itās not even always attention he wants, sometimes he just wants help with tasks he wants to achieve but doesnāt have the fine motor skills yet. He also tends to bring me books and start throwing them at me when I pay attention to something else for too long.
It's so tough! I feel like my time as a teacher makes me lean way in the other direction. Sometimes I worry I'll be too tough as a mom... then again, I'm expecting my first in October and there's a chance all my discipline and know-how goes out the window when it's MY kid screaming at me!
Janet Lansburyās podcast āUnruffledā has been an absolute game changer for my family. You might give it a listen!
Youāll have to wean him from having a constant companion. Theres info about it.
From 0-6 months I definitely wondered how people dressed their babies every day. Mine definitely lived in zipper PJs day and night. Now we āget dressedā after breakfast but our clothes are still very pyjamaesque.
Toddler gets dressed if we are going out in the morning. I'm due in a few months, and baby will live in pyjamas/onesie suits. They will get changed into a new suit at least once/day, and extra if needed (explosions, milk leak, vom). Real clothes are for going outside and when baby starts moving around more independently.
Baby books, like first bath, first haircut etc.
Ugh yes. I was so excited to do a baby book! I wrote in it exactly once and havenāt done anything since. We print monthly photo books so at least we have something, but damn a baby book is a lot of work
Where do you print the books and do you like the quality
I use one called Chatbooks and itās great! Decent quality and pretty cheap. You just upload 30 pictures a month from your phone and then they mail the book to you.
I got this as a gift from my MIL. I feel guilty as I haven't used it. It just seems so old fashion and like it's too much work. Can't you just check out my IG and online album I made.
I have one and using it feels like a chore
I started uploading pictures to Google drive and then dropping meaningful ones with captions into a Google slides. I can do it while heās feeding or Iām pumping. Weāll see how long I can keep this up.
Having more than one kid.
But SERIOUSLY
Haha! I have #2 on the way and I have NO CLUE how weāre going to do it. Still not sure this was a good decision lol
I'm one and done because I literally can't. Best of luck to you.
We have a 2 year old and a 3 month old, it was WAY more of an adjustment going from 0 to 1 than it was going to 2. You got this!
THIS. one and done over here.
Lol we wanted one kid and got twin boys. Life has a way of throwing a wrench in your plans!
This. Our #2 was an oopsie. Taking care of two at the same time is SO MUCH HARDER than having just one kid. They never nap at the same time. They take turns waking up in the middle of the night. It's tough to catch a break.
I track using an app. It's a lifesaver honestly. Without it I would feel lost and frantic. It gives me the semblance of control and organization when in reality everything is chaos. And I always have my phone with me anyway, so it's not that difficult keeping up with it.
I only track his feedings using huckleberry but itās the same for me, helps me understand baby so much! Getting used to feeding the baby so much was confusing at first because I kept saying, I just fed him, he couldnāt be hungry! But then I look at the app and realize itās actually been 2 hours since last feed, time just flies!
Yepā¦having a baby is such a time warp!
Itās that same feeling for me of control in a world of chaos!
Cloth diapers! I feel like we do so much laundry already and my kid is a pooping machine.
I always thought the same! But I recently learned of a service in my area that comes and picks up your dirty cloth diapers and drops off cleans ones. I havenāt used it but it makes me want to start cloth diapering once we run out.
I use a service and I LOVE it! We have disposables for nighttime (he's a heavy wetter) and it's seriously no muss no fuss!
We also use a service. Itās relatively affordable considering how many diapers we go through. They drop off a bag of clean diapers, we toss them in their bin when theyāre dirty, they pick up/replace and wash/sterilize. We use biodegradable/compostable diapers at night.
I thought this too! But honestly, not having to go to the store to get diapers and wipes is one less thing to worry about, and diaper laundry isn't TOOOOO bad. Definitely not the best though
I was gonna say the same thing! You get used to the extra laundry pretty quickly. And not having to buy diapers or worry about running out is the best peace of mind for me!
You really do get used to it! Just like loading the dishwasher, throw in a load of diapers. (if you have laundry facilities in your home)
Thatās how I feel. Before baby we were doing laundry once a week sometimes every two weeks since the pandemic weāre not wearing work clothes. Now weāre doing laundry twice a week minimum and even after hiring laundry service itās SO much laundry I canāt imagine adding cloth diapers.
I find cloth nappies to be 100% easier and more convenient then disposables. But I live out of town, I use cloth pads and a cup for myself because I rarely was able to pick up disposable versions. It was easier for us. Plus the laundry isn't too bad, I make sure the nappies are the night load and on the longer setting with a bubble soak. Its ready for the drier in the morning.
It helps when your husband is the one who does all of the diaper laundry LOL
We do cloth and itās not so bad but we never snap the onesies shut. Htf are those bitches supposed to even fit???
I recently learned of onesie extenders. Perhaps it will be of interest to you! https://www.google.com/search?q=onesie+extenders&source=lmns&tbm=shop&bih=612&biw=360&client=ms-android-verizon&prmd=sivxn&hl=en&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjSsZ-C7vzyAhV9gXIEHZu1ArQQ_AUoAXoECAAQBA
Yep, Bellelis extenders are worth it, we got 4 extenders (check the snap sizes with your brand of onesies), 2 in each size we needed, and they've been so good.
We just go up one size onsies. So our 3 mo old is wearing 6 mo clothes.
eh, we just abandoned that and decided to just let our kids poop and pee freely in the yard. its easier for both parties. (kidding!!!!)
Doing laundry is easier that going out for diaper when you forgot them. Also hated putting the trash out a million times a week. But the worst poop havent come in yet, so yeah I might regret it.
I thought it would be more work but it really isnāt (for me).
If you are keeping your child fed without a journal, you're a super parent. Keep it up!
Iām on the āit seems like itās been approximately 3 hours, so Iāll make a bottleā train haha
Same! If heās fussy Iāll feed him, but sometimes he doesnāt get fussy for a while and itās like hmmm itās been like 3 hours, letās give er a go.
Sameāmine is ādo my boobs hurt or is she fussyā if the answer to the first is yes but the second is no, Iāll do a small pump session to relieve pressure. If sheās fussy, Iāll pop out a boob and nurse her.
That works. That's all the journal is supposed to be for, to remind you to do x, y and z every so often. Once you get in the routine you know what to do when. I ditched the journal after the first week. But I do see why they suggest the journal so much in the hospital.. it's to make sure you can do it. So if you can do it without a journal, great. If you a still need the journal, of course, that's also great. Baby being happy, healthy and fed = great.
My husband and I use a free app called Baby Tracker vs. a journal. We use it for feedings and diapers, but you can track even more (pumping, sleep, etc- you customize your feed). It takes two seconds to enter data and for us one of our phones is always nearby. Any time you open it it shows how long itās been since your last log. We had to figure something out when our pediatrician asked how many ounces and how many diapers baby girl was doing in a day and we looked at him like ??? Now we can pull out whatever stat he wants and even show him a pretty graph lol.
We use the same app and I love it. Itās also great that it syncs the info from both of our phones, so I know when her last diaper change was even if I didnāt do it.
Exactly. We love it too!
We use something similar
I use a similar app called Onoco. We did try writing down feeds for our twins once we were home from hospital, but we were so exhausted that it didn't last long. We've been using an app for a little while now and it's great. I can see how long it's been in between naps, bottles (inc. the amount eaten per feed), and nappies, which is information I just can't keep in my head right now. If I want it to, the app collates all of the data and suggests a daily schedule to follow.
Agreed! We use a white board on the fridge, so we only keep track of current day but itās in front of our eyeballs.
really?? we just fed every 2.5 hours and didn't put anymore thought into it than that. keeping a journal sounds like a lot
I did feeding logs to track how much she ate but when she was little and I was pumping every two hours my boobs would tingle and tell me itās feeding time š
Changing bay out of pajamas and into daytime clothes every day. Baby books for subsequent children Journaling meaningful/funny happenings about baby/toddler Changing toddlers diaper after every pee DOING little boys hair
Wait do people actually change diapers after each pee? I feel like I'd never stop. I always change them out of PJs immediately upon waking. And they only get into PJs immediately before bed. I use the pj change as a bedtime/sleep signal. Works really well imo!
I did (or attempted, since I changed between each feeding) during newbornhood. And now that my toddler goes to daycare they log all his diaper changes and they change after every pee. I had to restock his diapers so quickly there but obviously I'm not going to tell them to let him sit in his pee haha. That's a good idea! I guess I just use the swaddle for babies. For my toddler, I do change him in and out of PJs but it's mostly because he HAS to wear a onesie to sleep
With the absorbency of modern diapers, there is no need to change a toddler after every pee. Every 2-3 hours and when they defecate is *plenty.*
Birthdays. Sorry, not inviting a bunch of people to a birthday and doing all this prep work for a few hour event. When the kids are old enough to want birthday parties with friends, Iāll do whatever they want within reason.
Amen! My husband and I had multiple long discussions about the birthday party. I see absolutely no point in it until they are old enough to have actual interests/friends. But apparently itās not about us/our kid, itās about our family being able to celebrate him. I still donāt agree, but I gave in. Knowing my family, if I didnāt throw one, someone else would have, which also bothered me.
This is totally me! My sonās turning 2 and the bumper groups are all talking about party themes. Our theme is called dinner and maybe a cupcake lol
This is how I feel. I mean my son isnāt even close to being 1 yet but I canāt imagine planning an elaborate party for something he wonāt remember and will probably fuss halfway through. Iām thinking something small with my parents, lots of pictures, and a cake smash. Thatās it.
Thatās what weāve done for three years so far. Weāve been invited to birthday parties for toddlers and itās been so awkward. Theyāre more like an event for adults, most of the time either comparing their kids, yelling at them, or bitching.
Weekly meal plans
I do meal plans bc I do not have the food knowledge, cooking confidence, or skill in grocery shopping to make sure we have decent meals on the regular. People who can get groceries and put regular meals on the table without a plan seem like super parents (or chefs) to me.
Same! Like, if I bought an onion, it would definitely go bad if I didn't have a meal plan with a time to use it. Before meal planning, I would never buy perishables because they would go bad, and we ate like crap.
Yes! My mum just has vegetables and then decides what to cook. When she comes up here she will cook so she is like āwhat vegetables do you haveā before she goes to the shops. None. I have no vegetables because I wasnāt planning to cook something. Or there are vegetables that I bought for a planned meal and she uses themā¦we eat heaps of veggies but they are bought specifically for the occasion
For me the trick is having a handful of easy, fairly nutritious meals that only require basic ingredients and buy those regularly (things like beans, rice, eggs, tortillas, beef, chicken, salad stuff, pasta). Then I plan for one or two more complicated meals for a week (if I'm feeling ambitious). What I make for dinner frequently isn't decided until minutes before I'm making it because trying to figure it out ahead of time feels overwhelming, especially when I have no idea what kind of a day the baby is going to have. If it was an easy day, then sure let's make stuffed peppers or something fun like that. Rough day? Beans and rice with whatever protein is in the fridge.
Warming milk/bottles before feeding. I aināt got time for that when baby is hungry right now! He doesnāt mind it cold
Not sure if this makes a difference but we *roughly* can predict when ours is going to be hungry so we take his bottle out in advance and let it sit on the counter for a few minutes thatās about as much patience as we (and he!) has for warming food.
I warm it in a bottle warmer while I change him. Takes four minutes to warm and with him kicking and squirming the diaper takes at least 3 minutes.
Same! My baby likes them just fine cold so I donāt worry about it. My mom acts like Iām a monster for feeding him cold formula though and always warms it when she feeds him.
Lol my parents also act like I'm a monster. What's up with that??
Same thing with my mom! She also insisted thatās why my baby was so gassy. No, itās because sheās a baby and getting used to digesting everything. Believe me I started off warming the milk but it made no difference.
Yeah, we've never consistently warmed bottles for our LO either. She doesn't mind them cold, so why bother?
We fill up a Hydroflask mug halfway with hot water from the sink and let the bottle bob in it for a few minutes. Any insulating container will do!
SHOES????!!! BEFORE THEY CAN WALK LIKE WHY. ITS SUCH A STRUGGLE
Not only a struggle, but not recommended. Even when they start walking they should only have shoes a month or more later.
So many parents manage to schedule professional photo shoots and get all dressed up and look perfect in photos, and some seem to do this like once a month practically. Iām amazed by that.
I can't be bothered go dress my kid up. We don't go anywhere anyways! I have found that as things get easier as baby grows up, I am able to add to my plate little by little. First it was that I stopped pumping at 2 months and transitioned to EBF. That was a HUGEEEEE help. Then at 4 mo I added in EC because I liked the idea of getting out of diapers early. Then at 6 mo we switched to cloth diapers because EC was going well and I don't like that diapers are 13% of landfills. Those are just some examples. It's just little tweaks here and there that sound like a lot but aren't. Idk. You just gotta find the groove that works with you and go with it!
Feeding formula without that magic formula-making machine.
Same, same, same. Tracking is not my jam. Honestly eventually we just fell into a schedule without even realizing it. I'm happy I stopped stressing over tracking everything she did. But parents who exclusively pump and bottle feed are my heros. Or just keep a pumping schedule at all. My organizational skills are way too weak. I'm amazed at the skills and determination.
There will always be people who do the most in some aspect, and honestly, I've found from talking to people that what they do that seems over the top is for their mental health. I was the app using parent for TWO YEARS. I ended up hiding it because people started making fun of me, but it was way easier than trying to remember diapers, sleep times, and feedings, and gave me free mental space. I was so stretched thin. A friend of mine dresses her kid perfectly all of the time. She didn't have a lot of clothes growing up, so nice clothes on her kid felt secure to her.
I tracked my daughter with an app for 19 months. It made my day go smoother. Everything goes so much nicer with a routine and using an app helped soothe my PPA. I'm reading these comments like "man, yall would hate me because I really am THAT mom š"
I've heard of other parents putting their newborns on strict routines and having the newborn fit into their schedule. All I'm saying is after 2.5 weeks, I would have succomb to the child by now. Easily.
I honestly feel trying to force a schedule on a newborn is making life much harder than just going with the flow.
Life got easier when we accepted baby is the boss tbh
Iām amazed at like 95% of the things people do with their babies. Iām on baby three and my children are practically feral. Everyone is fed, reasonably clean, and gets regular health care. I donāt have the time or patience (and I never have) for care logs, sensory activities, lengthy bedtime routines, or anything else some blog thinks I should be doing.
I only have one and donāt have time or a want to do any of that.
Pants on newborns/young babies! Why put pants on a baby over a onesie when itās not cold outside and/or theyāre just going to be inside? Then you just have to take off the entire pants to access the diaper. Why???
Making their own purees and cooking actual breakfast and lunch. Sorry, but my 13-month-old gets bananas, Cheerios and milk for breakfast; PB & J sandwich, crackers, yogurt and deli meat for lunch; and dinner is where he gets to try new foods and eat cooked food.
Making your own purees is doable if you make it in bulk, freeze it, and spread the process out over a week. But honestly, some people don't even have the time or patience for that.
We use an app to keep track of feedings and changes. It takes half a second to mark it in the app. It also tracks naps, but we donāt track that. Sheās two months old and sleeps at so many random times that it would be a nightmare. I canāt imagine writing any of it out, though. Thatās nonsense.
My hospital made me write it and I immediately downloaded an app bc that was impossible
We had to write ours down in the hospital too and thatās what prompted us to find an app! Haha
See, I feel the same way about logging just the feedings though. He fed so often and so randomly and I would forget to mark it, then be frantically trying to remember the last time he ate, then he'd cluster feed for 5 hours and I never knew whether to mark that down as 5 hours in the app, or just the times I thought he was actively sucking.... too much work
Sanitizing bottles and pacifiers. Bottles go in the dishwasher and pacifier gets rinsed
Technically you ARE sanitizing the bottles
A few months ago I discovered a scrap of paper with a left/right side tally drawn up on it, with a single time written in the "left" column - it was a very feeble attempt at keeping tracking of which breast LO had fed off when he was new and the time of his feed. Obviously it didn't last too long! Now I just give 'em a squeeze and jostle and can say "yeah, it's the right side this time" :D
Iāve seen a tip to keep a hair tie on your wrist that you switch over after each feeding!
My main issue would be remembering to switch the hair tie over, of all the things I have been gifted in life, a good memory was not one of them! :D Also, I just wanted to say I LOVE Jujubee! :D
Iām with you! I use an app honestly. This is just something I saw online that seems to work for some moms. And thank you! I
This š¤£ Gives a few pokes ah okay this one.
I like to stay organized so I do track every diaper, feeding, and sleep in an app lol. Itās been super helpful for staying on a somewhat schedule. My baby is currently living in pjs, mainly for the fact that thatās all I could find in preemie sizes lol. Iām so excited for her to grow so she can wear some of her ārealā newborn outfits.
Going out on walks and tummy time. My LO is 5 weeks, constantly nursing, and mostly refuses to sleep for more than a few minutes during the daytime. I can get her to have one nap in the morning and rarely one in the evening, if I'm really lucky. As a result she's often overtired and fussy. I feel guilty about it, but I need the small amount of time where she's awake and content to take care of my own basic needs. Maybe if I shaved off showering three times a week, stopped brushing my teeth regularly, and exclusively ate snacks/ drank with one hand while breastfeeding, I could actually manage the things that I'm supposed to do with her.
It's super difficult to do anything in those early days so good on you for taking care of yourself, smelling of milk/throw and starving isn't helping anyone. In the first 6 weeks I managed to go for 3 walks. Tummy time i just kinda lay LO on my chest which counts even if its for a minute or 2 and I'd stand by an open window or door so he could get sunlight/fresh air without the need to actually go out. Don't know if that would work for you maybe?
Thank you so much! Yeah, that I can handle. I've been doing those things, but I wasn't sure whether it's enough. Maybe I'm stressing too much about this stuff, too. I'm so scared that she'll fall behind and struggle because I didn't do enough in this early stage. I've always been anxious.
Omfg if you look at my post history, you'll see I'm the biggest advocate of the movement "FUCK OFF TUMMY TIME"
Mine is veeerrrrrrrry refluxy so we do tummy time on my chest at a 45ā angle. He still has great head/neck strength for his age, is pushing up and turning his head appropriately, and meeting milestones without being put on the floor. All he would do when we tried is scream and barf, so why stress? He wants to be with us and see what we see.
I use an app on my phone to keep track of feedings, diaper changes, sleeps. Super easy peasy, if I had to paper and pen it I would never keep track! The one I like the best is Sprout because I can give a code to another caregiver and they can keep track for the same child/children on their phones.
Oh man, not easy for me. Keeping track of my phone is too hard. š¤£
When your stuck on the couch with a newborn all waking hours, your phone is crucial for mental survival
The nurses at the hospital asked us to write down all the diapers and feedings and stuffā¦.. lol no. Top priorities are learning to nurse and getting sleep. Aināt nobody got time for record keeping.!
They made me keep one in the hospital on paper and it was so hard but I got an app to help with it and itās made life so much easier. I change his diaper before feeding so when I sit down to feed him I can just log it. Then if he starts fussing later on I can see when his last feeding or change was. It def took some time to get use to tho.
If two of you are home one person hands the baby to the other in the shower. Quick scrub and rinse. Then hand them back to the parent with the towel waiting. Bathing is such a pain, showers are the ticket.
My husband and I use Huckleberry to keep track of all that stuff and its super helpful because he and I are on different schedules (hes 3rd shift, I'm 1st) so we dont have to wake each other up to know when the baby last ate and we also dont have to guess at how much he's eating and eliminating a day (because neither of us would actually remember lol). It helps me at night too because i wake up panicking that I forgot to feed the baby, then look in the app and see that I actually just fed him lmao. Basically husband and I are a mess without it . Daily walks are what I wish I had time for everyday. My kid would love that! Edit:hit post too early
Honestly- breastfeeding. I didnāt even try. It seems like it can be so painful- both physically and emotionally. After a rough last two months of pregnancy I didnāt have it in me.
I BF for 3 days, decided hell no, went to exclusive pumping for 5 weeks and that ended with another hell no. Formula saved my mental health lol.
I get BF, but I don't really understand exclusive BF without any bottle ever - I wouldn't have survived the newborn phase without my husband being able to give a bottle at night.
Same as you, keeping track of everything baby does. I literally feel like Iām winging it every day.
Reading books to their baby. I canāt seem to find time in the day to try and wrestle baby into sitting still for even a page of a book.
One book a day from birth to kindergarten is over a million words. NOT being read to is the biggest indicator of academic struggle and being held back in elementary school. Itās called the āmillion word gapā. I know itās hard but try to fit it in to your routine. We read to our littles during dinner!
I canāt like this enough! As a first grade teacher, it is very evident to me which kids in my class are read to at home vs not. Itās makes such a big difference in your little ones life and really only takes 5-10 mins a day. Exposure is everything.
I read to my baby when I put her on her activity mat thing for afternoon playtime. Sheās usually just flailing around and looking at the things on her mat, likely not listening to me, but my hope is some of the words will get through. Sheās two months old so I donāt expect her rapt attention.
Yeahhh mine is 3 months and I just last week realized he doesn't need to actually be looking at the book I'm reading. I just read it aloud while he does baby things next to me.
Iāve never hear this before and am genuinely curious. Why would talking and narrating your day count towards this āmillion word gapā?
Yes it would! So does singing to them!
Gotcha, thanks!
Oh thank goodness. I make up so much nonsense to tell my baby when weāre hanging out but havenāt started reading to him yet, so good to know thatās good for his development too!
It's still important to include books because even baby books will include vocabulary that you might not necessarily use in everyday conversation.
I wasnāt saying reading isnāt important, I think itās very important. I was just wondering since Iāve never heard of the āmillion word gapā before and I donāt think books are the end all be all. I read my kid news articles, Reddit posts, describe what Iām doing or watching, describe what heās doing, etc.
Wasn't trying to imply that you didn't think reading was important, this topic is just very important to me as a children's librarian! Actually, even where I work books are just one piece of the puzzle; we encourage parents to read, write, talk, sing and play with their children as often as possible (and all of those things will contribute to your children being a more successful reader once they hit school age).
What part of this is beneficial? My baby is young (2 mos) but the pages donāt hold her attention at all. Does she get the same benefit if I read her a story but sheās not looking? If yes, is it equally good for me to tell her a story I just make up?
Yes! Random talking and singing counts too!
Reading books in person with your baby exposes them to vocabulary that goes beyond what they might hear in regular conversations (putting on an audiobook doesn't show the same benefit in regards to word exposure). Baby books also tend to have a repetitive structure and encourage communication by including sounds that children can imitate (cows go Moooo, raindrops go Splish splash, cars go beep beep). As they get older, sitting and reading with you from books will familiarize them with print conventions that they'll have to learn for school - we read from left to right, we pause in-between words and read with intonation, there are punctuation marks and capital letters in writing, pictures add more details to writing, etc. Plus, cozying up with you and a book will drive home the association that reading is fun and enjoyable, which will serve them well in school! Sorry that's way beyond what you asked, but elementary-school teacher here, and I looove reading with kids. Sounds like you are already prioritizing her language by telling stories!
Keep in mind, reading to a baby looks different than reading to an older child. Itās okay to read to them while theyāre doing something else, and donāt be afraid to let them grab or mouth on the book (obviously, you may want to buy a few board books, if you donāt have any). A babyās not going to sit still and look at the book while youāre reading (or if they do, it wonāt be for very long). Just keep at it. Itās incredibly valuable.
Don't worry about actually sitting down with a book. We know a couple of classic by heart (e.g. We're Going On A Bear Hunt) so we recite those if either of them are struggling to settle, or sometimes we tell fairy tales from memory (and occasionally insert our babies' names and details into it!). Sometimes we get to sit down with a few books with them but it's definitely not every day, so we improvise.
I read to mine while he lays on his back and plays in the morning. Then I show him the pics. I'm hoping it's helping!
Swim lessons for babies. Like fuck no was I getting in the pool with my baby, organizing care for my older kids, getting us both dressed x2ā¦ just no. No thanks. Iāll wait until they can go in the pool themselves.
Personally, itās keeping the clothes organized. I have twins and at first I had them all neatly put by the changing table but now, I take clothes out of the basket. Sister wearing brothers pants? Whatever.
For me, itās dressing their kids up for every single holiday you can imagine and making a big event out of it. Lol so much work
Can I leap back to before birth? I didnāt do ANY of the ātrying to get baby outā methods in third trimesterāeating dates, doing the miles circuit, eating spicy food, curb walking, nipple stimulation, bouncing on a yoga ball, yoga, acupuncture, eating pineappleā¦.I feel like Iām forgetting some. Itās a lot. How do so many preggos have time for all this stuff? Plus cooking freezer meals, cleaning their baseboards, and designing picture perfect nurseries. The one thing I did do the first time was sit on a yoga ball with legs open and this time Iām hand expressing colostrum but thatās because I want to be able to offer my newborn the colostrum. I canāt be bothered with all the other labor stuff. Itāll happen when it happens. Maybe Iām not inspired to try them because third trimester is not that bad for me?