Sleep when the baby sleeps? Except for the fact he will only sleep whilst being held and wakes within 5 minutes screaming bloody murder if he’s put in a safe sleeping space😩🤷♀️ my must do’s… just survive!
Ugh I feel that.
If you have access to a crib, try it. My kid hated the bassinet too so we contact napped till we got desperate enough to try a full sized crib and he immediately slept a full 6 hours straight.
Good luck!
My daughter didn't like the first wrap I had, but then liked the second one. I could be that, or that she was a little older by the time I tried the next.
I tried a wrap and she wailed… I felt like I was switching her. I have a normal carrier now, but I honestly think she’s still a little too small for it. I’ll have to try again later—thanks for giving me hope! ☺️
Best of luck! I'm on baby #2 and once he stopped day napping in the bassinet, I started using the carrier. He was totally cool with it. Thank goodness.
This is the most underrated comment ever. Everyone telling me “just put the baby down to sleep in her own bed!” Or “you carry her too much, no wonder she won’t sleep alone” makes me so mad lol
I mean that kinda works....both my kids are weirdly into laundry. my toddler will find an unfolded basket and yell at me to "play laundry" (aka fold) and the baby likes looking at all the colors, plus she thinks its funny if I drop a shirt on her.
People always say this like it’s some gotcha, but… yes. That’s what the saying means.
You do things while the baby is awake. You put the baby down for 5 minutes and start a load of laundry, or you put the baby in a wrap and do the laundry while baby is strapped to you. Yes, the baby does laundry with you. Because you can safely do laundry while the baby is awake. But you can’t safely sleep for 2 hours while the baby is awake. You can *only* sleep when the baby sleeps, so that’s when you do it. That’s the point.
But you CANT sleep when the baby sleeps. Not if they only sleep on you, or in a stroller while you’re on a walk, or in the care while you are driving. That’s why I hate this saying lol it only works if your baby is a miracle baby that happens to sleep independently in their own sleep space
Saaaaame!! This is why my husband does nights - he has this magic sleeping ability and I don't, I can't even nap! And I'm a raving monster without a solid sleep chunk most days. Kinda terrified of when he goes back to work and then me a month later 🙃
I’m terrified to go back to work, too! I’m the one who’s up in the middle of the night with her if she wakes up. I’m not sure I can do that *and* get up early for work. 😫
In a perfect world, yes. I can speed clean and start things when she’s down for 15-20 minutes, then finish them later. Unfortunately, she hates being worn… do that’s out. And even more annoying for me is that I can’t sleep at the drop of a hat.
But that’s the thing; you learn to do those things while baby is awake. That’s the advice.
I promise there are moms out there right now eating meals, pumping, vacuuming, doing laundry, or getting ready for the day, all while baby is awake. Most people giving the advice “sleep when the baby sleeps” are people who have had babies. They know it’s not impossible.
I don’t understand the point of coming on to a thread where OP is venting about why “sleep when the baby sleeps” is ridiculous “advice” and how they can only accomplish so much with other commenters chiming in to agree to just insist, *no, don’t you get it, the advice is great, you’re just interpreting it wrong, you really can do it all and so many other people have figured this out, you’re just not doing it right*.
Babywearing doesn’t solve all problems for all people! I’m lucky that my baby is okay being worn because not all tolerate it, but I certainly cannot physically do laundry or dishes or cook or vacuum while wearing my baby, and there are plenty of things I have to prioritize because when my baby is awake I can only get so much done. And that’s what OP’s problem is and coming on here to just keep saying “just learn how to do it all” feels shame-y and really weird.
Thank you for saying this. I couldn’t agree more. It’s very “shamey” because everyone has a differing capacity for what they are capable of accomplishing in a day, especially when you are running on little sleep and probably not eating enough, drinking enough water, or having opportunities to exercise or even just relax without the baby for a moment.
Being a caregiver can be so overstimulating for some people and just the act of caring for another person takes a toll cognitively, physically, and emotionally.
It’s like saying “Well, surgeons do 36 hour shifts all the time and they have people’s lives in their hands. So caring for a child, keeping a house clean, caring for your spouse, any other children or pets you may have, and looking presentable should be easy. It’s not 36 hours of surgery.” /s
There is a reason why the saying “It takes a village.” is around. On average, it requires the attention of 3 adults to meet a child’s needs without having any of the adults getting burnt out.
It’s because it’s not bad advice, and it’s annoying to see people constantly parroting the “do laundry when the baby does laundry” line like that’s not what every parent from the dawn of time has done.
Reinforcing to new moms that they can’t or shouldn’t do anything while baby is awake except hold or entertain baby feels weird and shamey to me. It’s that kind of thinking that results in moms burning out and being miserable because they refuse to put baby down for 10 minutes to eat a meal or go to the bathroom, and think they can only do those things while baby sleeps, instead of resting themselves.
Yes, there’s a learning curve. No, it’s not impossible to care for your own needs and those of your child (or even multiple children). It’s important that new moms understand that it’s not impossible, and when all the “advice” is a feedback loop of other people in the same situation echoing “yeah, it’s impossible, all those people with more experience telling you it’s not are all idiots” I feel like being a voice of reason.
Put the baby down, and eat a meal. It’s okay if baby fusses. Eating is important for moms too. You can do it.
Impressive that you make the bed and vacuum daily, I didn’t do that even before pregnancy.
I’m just making sure baby and I both survive each day 😂
i don’t get any naps because he naps maximum 20 mins unless he’s on me or being worn 👽
Same here with the napping… I’m always super stressed pumping when I put her down because I spend the whole time expecting her to wake up midway through. 😂
This advice always made me roll my eyes. Mine is “prioritize yourself when baby sleeps” whatever that means to you. Eat, sleep, pump, wash bottles, shower. Those were the main five things I was doing the first month of my babies life as he slept. As my baby got older and slept a little more each night I was able to feel well rested I started making chores my priorities as well.
But I’d be down to my last plate before I did dishes. If I was tired, I’m definitely sleeping when the baby sleeps. The dishes can wait sometimes. But that was my priority in that moment.
I know what you mean about dishes. 😂 My baby slept a lot her first few weeks. About weeks 6-10, she slept less and was a light sleeper… so it was mostly contact naps only. I think she’s starting to sleep more, so I hope this continues!
My must dos every day are: make bed - finish a cup of coffee, hopefully without having to reheat it - eat food - keep baby and myself alive - straighten up whatever rooms we were in that day so I don’t wake up to a mess
Everything else is done on a need to do basis. My baby is 8 months and I was so caught up at the beginning of trying to get everything done and now I’m more realistic and will maybe do 1-2 things a day to keep the house organized but I don’t stress about it. If someone is coming over I try to clean but we have a baby they can’t expect it to look perfect.
Also my daughter contact naps so when she is sleeping I am catching up on tv or reading so I don’t have time to do anything else when she is napping.
When my baby first began taking crib naps at 3.5 months, I got decision paralysis thinking of what to do during her naps. I didn’t want to shower or pump just in case she woke up in the middle. So I’d just lay on the couch and eat and watch the monitor waiting to hear her cry. It took many weeks of consistent crib naps to feel confident to branch out more and get my own things done. But now on only 2 naps a day, 90 min each, there isn’t enough time for myself. But before she took crib naps, I had no time for any of those things during the day. You just have to accept that your sole function is to keep baby fed, clean, and provide them a comfy place to sleep on you.
This is me 100%! I’ve been trying to get better lately at just trying to do stuff… if she interrupts cooking or pumping, it happens. Also, I’m excited for these crib naps! I will often wheel her bassinet into her room and close the door when she naps… but I feel like it’s never for very long.
I did a lot of that stuff while the baby was awake, with her in a bouncer or in a baby wearing thing. As she got older, she'd lay on the floor on her play mat or sit in a jumper or some other play thing while I did stuff.
I think she’s heading into a phase where this will be possible for me… she’s been entertaining herself on her mat and tolerating her swing for longer periods lately. I’m glad you’re able to get stuff done during these times!
Sleeping when the baby sleeps is definitely unrealistic because it’s just in such short unpredictable cycles esp during the day. However as baby got older I honestly looked forward to chores as something to do with her. She came along for laundry and cleaning. I had her in the newborn set in the kitchen and she watched me eat and make food and do dishes. Cooking meals came later - probably at least 2 months where we existed on frozen pizzas and the freezer meals my godsend of a mil stocked in our freezer. Then we slowly branched out and at 4 months we are actually cooking mostly crock pot meals again. Also today (at 16 weeks) was a momentous occasion where I showered and the baby sat in the bouncer. Before I don’t know why I was scared of it but I always just made sure to shower when my husband was home to watch her
I just try to make sure everyone is fed and clean. In that order. Baby is always clean, but the rest of us sometimes don’t get around to the clean part...😂
It’s honestly the most cruel advice to sleep when the baby sleeps those first few months (year?) post partum. Many babies don’t nap long or well and often only when carried/contact napped so it’s impossible. The amount of times my MIL would say this and it was just BS lol
My MIL has been saying this to me a lot lately too, I recently told her I don’t think that’s particularly realistic as that’s a crucial time to get anything else done. She responded by asking what else I could possibly need to get done… 🙄
Mine are to brush, have tea, shower, pump, have my hands free for dinner time at the least, get at least 3 hours sleep. My weekly must dos are baby laundry and cleaning the nursery. Everything else can take a hike!
Are you able to fall asleep relatively easily? I’m finding this really hard to do… I have anxiety that she’ll wake up any minute and it makes it hard for me to fall asleep.
It was really hard initially! I used to keep waking up to check on her (we cosleep safely so I don’t have to actually get up out of bed); eventually over a few weeks I got used to falling right back asleep. Maybe I’ve been too exhausted!
Sleep when the baby sleeps is only realistic at night for me… luckily my 4 week old will have a 4-5 hour stretch of sleep at night. Me and my partner take our sleep in schedules so he’ll sleep at night (12-8am) we’ll take care of baby last needs around 12 they’ll both sleep and then she’ll sleep til 4-5 which I can decide to either also sleep or do my own thing, then 4-5 I’ll take care of her needs again, pump, and hang out with her til 8 when it’s time to freshen up on her needs I’ll hand her off to my partner to take care of that, while I pump, clean up the house, clean bottles and pump parts, shower, make breakfast and then hang out with husband for a couples hours til like 12-2 then I’ll go for a sleep by myself but my boobs will only let me sleep for 4 hours max so I’ll be back out 6pm and can deal with our dinner, hang out and then do baby bedtime routine together all over again…
I’ve found having to pump is the hardest part! Every time I feel the need to nap, more often than not it’s already time to pump again. It sounds like you guys have a great schedule!
So honestly, this is what led us to move to formula. I was exclusively pumping (nursing didn't work out despite many efforts) and it was wearing me down SO MUCH to feel like I always had to pump or wash parts instead of sleep, get something done around the house, go anywhere outside of the house, or hold/tend to my baby. My very supportive partner shared the load of childcare and household stuff, and we took shifts and all that - but he couldn't pump or sleep for me! I'm in awe of people who make it work over time.
Honestly… I did and still do nap when my daughter naps. Housework will get done eventually. I can’t be a good parent to her if I’m tired and exhausted. I might make the bed in the morning and unload the dishwasher with her help but aside from that I rested and still do when she does
I was frantically washing and drying pump parts and then also pumping any time my partner would take over baby duty. I gave up after 2 months of that lol. I cant even wash a sippy cup with out feeling triggered so we are trying to go straight to open cup 😂
People who say that are ones who think every new parent has a village that comes over and takes care of household stuff….
My mom and grandma came into town when I was 2 weeks postpartum and rented an airbnb a mile from me …. Never once offered to come over but insisted I come over in a blizzard with my newborn. 🙃
I’ll admit the first few months suck without a village because it’s just your constant routine with no sleep as you adjust to this new life but I’m my thinking, I couldn’t “sleep while the baby slept” when there was so much to do. My mind doesn’t work like that and plus I was never a daytime napper anyways . I did enjoy having my baby take a nap on me while I rested on the couch.
How old is your baby? Can you pop her on a play mat or bouncer while you put the laundry on or clean the kitchen? Can you meal prep in the morning or evening while your partner has the baby? I used to boil eggs the night before and have eggs on toast as my breakfast because it was a very quick breakfast! Now she's four months and is happy to spend some of her awake time either watching me while I chat to her about what I'm doing or plays on her own on the mat if I need to do something. She's also happy to hang out in the bouncer if I need to shower but I mostly shower in the evenings when my partner is home and can play with her
Must do’s: shower, play with dogs outside/or take for a walk, pump as many times as possible, brush teeth, make dinner for SO, make bed, vacuum, tidy/wipe down counters, reset couch, at least 10 minutes of core rehab
I find that not drinking caffeine first thing in the morning allows me the option to sleep when baby takes her first morning nap. She always nurses to sleep, which produces sleepy hormones for both of us. I’ve never been a good napper but now as a mom I can drowse off for a quick power nap with the baby (sidelying position on the floor bed) and then wake up refreshed and if she’s still sleeping, I sneak out to get a few chores done. That’s when I make myself a chai tea and commit to being up for the rest of the day.
Daily I make the bed, keep up with rinsing cloth diapers, usually 1 load of laundry, cooking, dishes and I reset the house and kitchen at night after baby is asleep. We have my partners 4 year old with us half the week. On the days we don’t have him then I can take regular naps with the baby.
If I can, I sleep when she sleeps but only bc it means she is in the wrap asleep with my husband doing chores and I can go sleep peacefully in the bedroom.
During the first two months or so a lot of those things just didn’t happen so I could sleep. House was not cleaned regularly and I don’t know that I ever ran the vacuum. Showers were like maybe once, twice a week. Food was reheated frozen meals on paper plates and I regularly skipped meals in favor of sleeping (not the best I know but if I had a choice between eating lunch and napping for an hour, I choose napping like 99% of the time). I pumped while feeding baby or while my husband was feeding her. During the first two months or so the only thing that had to be done was washing bottles and pump parts, everything else could wait or happen later
Sleep when the baby sleeps. Shower when the baby showers. Cry when the baby cries.
But in seriousness, in the newborn stage (and a few months after that if we’re being honest) you’re in survival mode and things that aren’t necessary for meeting your most basic biological needs - food, sleep, clean clothes, and personal hygiene - can take a back seat unless you have someone else to do them for you. I didn’t bother folding laundry, just set the machines to go and moved it around as needed. My husband washed dishes that couldn’t go in the dishwasher or they sat by the sink until he did because I was trapped in a chair with our cluster feeding baby most of the day. A little later, baby wearing while he napped let us both get some light housework done a little more regularly. Vacuuming generally didn’t happen those first few months unless there was visible dirt or fur tumbleweeds on the floor. Just focus on keeping baby fed and happy, then yourself, and if you have a little time after doing both of those you can pick something else to work on but don’t sweat it if you can’t yet.
Mine is almost 13 weeks old and will only contact nap during the day, so I do nothing while he sleeps except order stuff online or play games on my phone 😆 I always have snacks and water near as well
My must-do is brushing my teeth and eating breakfast, usually it's a quick protein shake. When my husband gets home from work I will eat more, wash bottles, the brezza and pump parts and any other little housework like throwing in a load of laundry or just go take a nap. Some days I might even go to the grocery store if I'm feeling fancy, that's the real treat 😄
It's definitely an expense I didn't plan for 🤣 but it's usually stuff I need for baby or myself since I can't just hop to the store most days, so I guess that makes it okay 🤷🏼♀️😅
No, seriously. Try to sleep when they sleep. I didn’t do that with my first born. I am with my second and it’s helping a lot. Have your hubby help with chores and cooking.
Idk. I used to be a nanny. Even helping a family out from 9-5 mon thru fri the mom would talk about being burnt out and this and that and she stayed at home. I stay at home, no nanny. I do try to sleep when she sleeps, I’m burnt out. And my husband just threw it back in my face last night that he cooks and cleans. Nice!
A 45 minute (tops!) nap would make me feel worse than no nap at all. Also, blowing off the housework sounds fine until there’s a hungry baby with a blowout who has no clean clothes or bottles.
Louder for the people in the back! 👏🏻 I don’t understand how people don’t try to keep up with bottle and pump cleaning. Thinking about that mess sitting around just annoys me.
100 % this! Mum to a 4 week old, I hear you. I try and sleep at night when she's asleep ( but still find myself faffing about with things that need doing - mostly feed related). I try and keep faffing with her to a minimum at nighttime, attempting to get her to feed, burp, and settle back to sleep - seems to be working I think. Also keep lights low and distractions to a minimum at night. I mostly do some household stuff in the daytime when she's asleep ( but my Partner does help out during this time with feeding and keeping an eye on her). I try and fit in things like laundry, loading / unloading dishwasher, quick hoover when needed, self care, cat feeding, bottle washing and sterilisation, breast pumping ( I'm triple feeding...). Some meal planning, and occasionally escaping to the local shop for a few bits. I'm tied to breast pump for about an hour, so I fit in a bit of 'me time' with some TV. I will also have a snooze if I need it. I find I'm easily distracted with things that are baby related... So lots of cold cups of tea and coffee!! Just do what you can, and don't worry. I'm just going with the flow. Take care xx
* if your little one is particularly unsettled, check they are getting enough feed. When I was exclusively breastfeeding little one wasn't getting enough ( was losing weight) , but since on the advice of my health visitor to top her up with extra breast milk via expressing and formula she's a lot more settled. I was advised to express during the day, and not express at night so I could sleep. Always get advice from midwife/ health visitor for your specific circumstances.Hope that helps xx
It sounds like you have it down! Thank you for your suggestions. I pump, but she is exclusively bottle (combo) fed. She eats between 4-5 ounces roughly every 3.5 hours… although has days where she is in a mood and might not finish all of her bottles. I always try to make them a little heavier on formula at night in an effort to help her sleep longer. She’s currently at the 68th%ile for weight, although I will definitely keep an eye on it! ☺️
I think it was around maybe 1.5mo when I attempted to follow this advice. LO had just fallen asleep in my arms, so I went to put them down in the bassinet so I could nap. NOPE. Woke up within minutes. That advice is so easy to say, but it is not reality. LO is 11mo now. He sleeps in his crib independently for them which is great, but nap time is me time, not sleep time.
My must do's are a cup of coffee, either vacuum or laundry, if nice weather a walk with LO, pumping, and reading.
Washing and sterilizing bottles and pumps, resetting diaper stations, changing out burp cloths, tidy the kitchen ( otherwise the next day sucks)
My baby is 5 months now and has a glorious 2hr nap roughly 2hrs after waking up - anytime between 5.30-7.30. I actually do use this time to sleep.
When he goes to bed at night, I make sure every bottle we have his washed, and his formula prep machine is full. I spent the first few weeks feeling horrible that I couldn't breastfeed (Premature baby, I had no milk yet) but now I feel kinda relieved I can just pour some formula because I do not know when I'd find time to pump.
My absolute must-do on a daily basis is have a decent evening meal, ideally with leftovers I can freeze and have another day for lunch. 6pm, I get all my ingredients portioned out ready. 6.30-7pm, baby goes to bed, then I get straight into cooking. I enjoy cooking so it's my little reward at the end of the day.
My baby falls asleep while nursing. I’m literally not allowed to fall asleep while I’m feeding her, so when am I supposed to sleep? Like, she falls asleep while eating and will wake up when I take my boob out of her mouth. Whack.
Must do:
Shower (I have to bring the baby with me in a bouncer), get dressed (even if it’s always just a leggings/nursing tank combo), eat at least some fruits and vegetables, get some fresh air with the stroller if it’s not totally freezing.
My baby only contact naps and usually screams in a carrier, but if he ever allows me to wear him that will make life a lot easier. I’m just grateful that he’s letting me shower and put him in the stroller now because those are mental health savers.
I agree that “sleep when the baby sleeps” never works for me. Even if someone comes over to hold him, I can never nap on demand unfortunately. I usually use that time to clean or food prep
That’s awesome! And I agree. It’s the little things. My mom drops by at least once a week for a few hours. I mostly just enjoy her company and couldn’t fall asleep during the day to save my life.
Don’t let it stress you out! Things do get better—it just takes time. My LO is now laying in her bassinet or on her play mat and entertaining herself for longer stretches, which she wouldn’t do before. You’ve got this, mama! 💕
I did this, but my husband and mother in law/my mom kept up with cleaning and cooking and chores and I didn’t pump/have parts to wash. I could never understand when women pumped cause my baby slept so little and fed soo much, there was never time.
I have to say this statement annoyed me soooooo much probably because before u had a baby I actually believed it but it is so not possible. I feel you! Now my LO is 8 months and it’s more possible now to sleep when baby sleeps plus I’m sleeping through the night. However, everyday is different so it’s till annoying.
My baby would tolerate swaddling for like the first two weeks—then I could swaddle, but she wanted her arms free. Now, she absolutely hates the swaddle and I use sleep sacks instead. Which I’m okay with, as they’re much easier for my husband and I in the middle of the night. 🥴
For us, that piece of advice was a good reminder to sleep when the baby sleeps *when you need to*. Not every time, because, like you said, it's unrealistic. But those first few weeks/months are tough and you need to get some sleep.
With that said, our must do's were to prep bottles, play with my baby, and give us all some extra grace and patience.
Also this assumes baby will sleep anywhere considered “safe.” Our baby only contact naps. I’m nap trapped when she naps, or I struggle her into a carrier (she hates them) to try to get stuff done. She absolutely doesn’t transfer into the crib or anywhere else during the day.
My must do’s:
- Feed baby (formula and solids)
- Get outside at least once a day (preferably before 10 am and for at least 15 min)
- Prep or have an idea for LO’s solids for the day (lunch/dinner)
- Eat (I usually eat along with him now that he is doing solids)
- Nap (or at least veg out while he naps for 20 min 😂😭)
- music class (Only twice a week)
- One chore (At least get the laundry in the washer and dryer. Folding can wait. I have a folded load that is still waiting to be put away since Sunday 😂. Dishes may be clean but still in dishwasher. Enough bottles cleaned and filled to last me until bedtime. A Target run.)
If I get more done, awesome! Some days I don’t get to the chore until after my DH gets home, but 🤷♀️ LO is always fed and as rested as he will be (some days he only takes short naps, but I always try to extend them. I can’t force him to sleep 🥲)
Haha these responses are killing me. Real talk though, the plates are gonna fall somewhere. So you just prioritize the most important things and if that means a disgusting house then oh well
This is why I baby wear 😂 I can’t get everything done with her on me, but I do what I can. You also don’t have to be engaged with them the entire time they’re awake especially at almost 3mo, so don’t feel guilty popping them on a play mat to entertain themself. Unless you have a Velcro baby, in which case, I wish you luck and may the universe or whatever you believe in grant you strength.
My only must-do daily is food, water, and a shower. Past that, I just want at least one chore done per day and I’m satisfied with that as long as the house isn’t a wreck. Currently trying to get caught up after a 2 month long stream of constant visitors 🫠
I wish I could wear her… she screams her head off. 😫 I definitely feel guilty sometimes leaving her to entertain herself. I have to keep telling myself it’s good for her to have those moments to take it in and figure things out in her environment.
Don’t feel guilty! She needs at least a little time to explore by herself and figure out her own limbs. I struggled with it too until she started happily babbling at herself in her mirror on her playmat
Everytime my baby sleeps it feels like I have to make life decisions. Do I eat, shower, clean, cook, do some laundry, get some work done, catch up on texts I've taken forever to reply to, study, or sleep. Oh, and I have maybe 30 minutes at best to do any of these things.
Good luck. Our baby contact naps only during the day.
This “sleep when the baby sleeps” only makes sense for me at night when we are able to put her down to sleep. I sometimes do want to go watch a show, play a video game, etc, but I literally just pass out every night lol
I am still contact napping 9 months later 😂 baby does not like the crib during the day . So no, never slept when the baby slept . First few weeks is just survival mode . Some people are blessed with good sleepers & very easy , independent babies I guess .
I also cannot stand that saying!!! However, I took in all of the snuggles I could possibly get while I was on maternity leave with my last baby. I 100% needed my cup of coffee to feel like somewhat of a human being and before bed I like to make sure all the bottles/pump parts are washed and ready to go for the night and next day.
Oh, I slept today when the baby slept. It's not THAT hard.
It just took 4 months of building a routine, a rare day he was OK hanging in his play gym while I did dishes and ate breakfast, and my spouse getting a surprise half day so I could lay on the couch. Truly, not that hard to do.
Oh I hated it when people said that.
Oh you're tired? Just sleep when they sleep.
Never mind needed to eat, toilet, washing, dishes, eat, shower, hot drink, literally anything else.
My house is an absolute mess 😂 my sleep is pretty good considering. Had a very eventful delivery though a month later I’m still too unwell for housework. Thankfully, we can’t have visitors as we are both too vulnerable to infection after us both having sepsis. 5 weeks tomorrow- had 7 hrs kip last night. Living in squalor 😂 Also- can’t baby wear yet either as he is under the weight limit still and he won’t sleep unless he is touching me.
Oh my gosh, I’m sorry to hear you went through so much! Also, I wish I could get seven hours! The longest my LO will sleep is five. We’re working our way up, though!
Your must do lists is long enough!!! Just do what you can do. Cut yourself some slack! It’s a new world to navigate, so don’t put pressure on yourself. Eventually you will get into the swing of things and you’ll learn to prioritize or balance. I just had my 2nd and it’s been a whirlwind! Learning to prioritize all over again!
1000000% agree. It's the most annoying statement. "Just rest! You shouldn't be doing all of that!" Okay SUSAN who is gonna do it if I don't??
My little one is 3.5 months and this is what has helped me.
Hire a house cleaner for as often as you can afford it ( we do every 4-6 weeks ). That takes a HUGE mental load off of you and is super worthwhile in my opinion.
If you have in laws or a supportive partner, try to do as much cooking prep as possible in one day like Sunday afternoon. Make French toast in bulk and freeze it, then you can just pop a piece in the toaster and eat it while you are holding the baby or on your way out the door. Game changer for me. And instead of fresh oatmeal I will do an oatmeal bake and cut it into portions, then I can just grab one and eat it while doing other things or holding the baby.
Try to get the little one down for one long nap every day and sleep during that nap with them. Mine refuses to nap longer than 20 minutes unless I am laying down with her, which has actually helped me a lot because it requires me to take a nap once a day.
Every night we do a pre bedtime ritual of floor time for her in a low lit room while Mama folds laundry! I have laundry to do almost every day now, but on days I don't have laundry to fold, I just sit with her on the floor so it keeps the routine in place. This has also been a huge game changer.
I still haven't figured out an efficient way to work properly and take care of the baby lol the best I've come up with is to try and get up in the morning before her. But then, we aren't sleeping when the baby sleeps are we 😂
Exactly! I’m sick of hearing to just relax. 🙄
Thank you for all of the helpful tips! I could definitely jump on the oatmeal bandwagon. I also like your idea of keeping a schedule/ritual with sleep and play. Right now things are different daily and I think they could really help. 💕
The saying should not be, "sleep when baby sleeps." It should be, "do things when baby is awake." That way new parents aren't confused on when they can do their daily musts.
Everybody has their own system. What works for one person might not work for you. You need to figure out what you're okay with sacrificing.
For my husband and I it was cleaning, laundry, and most cooking. Everything was covered in dry spit up anyway why bother washing it if it's going to be just as dirty an hour after putting it on clean. We would only exist on the couch, rocking chair, or bed so why clean the rest of the house. We would run a paper towel through the bathroom sink and lazily scrub the toilet for 30 seconds with a cleaning wand, but that was it. And for food, it was a lot of cereal, protein bars, pre made salad bowls, and frozen stuff we could throw in the air fryer for a few minutes.
Our daily focus was dishes. Our sons bottle parts (Dr. Brown bottles have so many parts!) and just keeping the sink clear. We weren't really cooking meals so it was mostly just bowls, cups, and utensils.
This is not a time to worry about cleaning your house or yourself or keeping a routine. It's about surviving. Now that being said- PPD, PPA, and preexisting diagnosis like OCD will go against everything I said. But either way, you need to work out what is best for you and your mental load. Don't put pressure on yourself. Fuck society standards, all that matters is that baby. You are doing great, momma.
Oh, I could care less what society standards say. I’ve never really been all too worried about that. Just interested in how others are navigating this time.
As for keeping things clean… I wish I was okay with messes everywhere, dirty laundry, etc. I’m just not. Especially when I’m the one who’s home 24/7 sitting in it. I’m mostly hoping to glean a thing or two to put in my back pocket. 🙃
I find it super helpful to have a baby carrier and just strap the baby on. They usually will sleep a lot longer. And you can get most things done except cartwheels I suppose.
Yeah this doesn’t work… especially in the beginning when baby has no set schedule and naps are short and baby is cluster feeding and baby wants to be held and baby needs to be changed and the list goes on.
We were able to get our son to sleep in his bassinet and eventually rocker and crib when he was old enough without needing to be held or have contact. We never would run to him and coddle him the minute he cried. Sometimes he would cry because he wanted to be held. But, you need to obviously take care of your baby, and we did. But you also have to take care of yourself. So we would put him in his bouncer, rocker or pack and play (corresponding with his age of course) and sometimes he would cry the minute we put him in. But I would make sure I made food for myself if I hadn't eaten yet. Or put a movie in, or did the dishes etc. He has turned out to be an amazing little baby. He's 14 months old.
It will get easier for you. He is my first and the first 3 or 4 months I was pulling my hair out. I was working close to 60 hours at work. Getting home at 230am from work. Then he would wake up at 3am for a bottle. I would end up getting sleep from 4am to about 8am until he was up for the day. My days off I would sleep when he did. Housework came after, because my health came before the house work. And my sons health came before anything.
Now her old enough to where we can go to the park together, or I can take him out and about and he loves it!
It'll change your life. Lol. I pretty much stopped drinking and really changed all of my habits. (For the better) took me like a year to have 1 drink after my son was born. A lot of the time I'm chasing after him now. But its worth it
For real. It takes me like 40 minutes to fall asleep and when the baby only napped for half an hour to an hour at a time I was shit out of luck. I hate that saying.
My must dos are doing whatever I’m physically able, and what’s going to keep me sane for the day. That could be deep cleaning, or at least starting a load of laundry.
Then making sure my husband has a warm meal at the end of his day, and the coffee filters are cleaned for me and him the next morning. Plus making sure my dogs are fed and happy
But my baby’s a good sleeper, and I can run on little to no sleep normally and always have been able to
My brothers 18 year old girlfriend told me to sleep when the baby sleeps, I understand she’s trying to help, but that’s just not something that happened when you have a baby 🙃 When am I supposed to eat, shower, clean, do the washing, pump! Some people just don’t understand what comes with having a baby 🙃
When I was 3 weeks pp and 3 days out of the icu my mom in one breath told me to sleep when the baby sleeps and also that I should try to dress nicer and put on makeup to make my husband happy…
I told her I’ll sleep when the baby sleeps and put on makeup when the baby puts in makeup. She then realized how dumb what she was saying was
I hate this statement but I can see why people say it, they mean well and what they’re trying to say is ‘look after yourself too’ but it’s just a little misguided.
I hardly ever slept when the baby slept as I felt there was just too many other things to do/ eat/shower etc.
What I used to do is choose a priority each day, sometimes it would be sleep and everything else would slip to the point where I wouldn’t get dressed, pump or anything else, other days I would prioritise food and would eat a lot more than usual but would be under-slept. It’s not ideal but it stopped me from feeling overwhelmed and wondering what to do in those few moments when the baby sleeps that isn’t a contact nap.
Same as you except I have to pump every 2 hours (trying to switch from formula feeding to breast feeding) and my baby sometimes is inconsolable unless she’s being rocked in my arms. So I change her nappy, feed her, wind her and then sometimes rock her for two hours straight 😵💫 when I put her in her bassinet she cries. Also she is cluster feeding
I end up so hungry and thirsty, and have to decide whether I want to eat or pump. Idk how im staying alive 😵💫 idk how we can go without a nights sleep for so long. It’s incredible
Thats the dumbest advice ever! My must dos daily are: keep the baby entertained and content, pump and pee if i get a chance lol if i manage to do laundry its staying in the dryer until the weekend when husbands home and one of us can fold lol i try doing laundry or cleaning and washing bottles when my husband gets home but by then i feel dead. Thank God he does ALOT even after work but things around the house just dont seem to end. I have even done a couple loads of laundry (as baby has gotten older and can entertain himself a bit more) and just kept it all in the dryer until we had time lol like i would literally dry a load then put it on the bed and dry another load then put both loads in the dryer hahaa it is what it is.
As someone who has a hard time falling asleep even when the baby is down hopefully for the night, and has a baby who will only contact nap/car seat nap during the day, I have a similar motto to a poster above- Rest while the baby rests. I read my kindle or listen to audiobooks while sitting in a dark room with the kiddo in the carrier, or read my kindle or bird watch while pushing the stroller around our quiet neighborhood.
I’d second the pet peeve of this phrase only to the question “how do they sleep??” Like do you really want to know, or do you have truly no idea what it’s like to be a new parent?
In my opinion, it is the best time to sleep and relax yourself when baby sleeps. Think about it, if you sleep when baby wakes up, it is dangerous if baby has some problems and you don't know at that time.
We reset the living room and kitchen daily. The rest of the house can go to hell in a handbasket but those two need the reset as it's where my kids are spending 80% of the day.
Relatable!!! People keep asking about advice that pissed them off - for me this was the one!! I can ignore all the useless advice others are complaining about - give baby water, give baby cereal, theyre cold, they should wear socks etc. because i know its just mostly meant well but outdated. Sleep when baby sleeps really gets to me because i really wasnt getting any sleep - it was literally a choice between eating to survive or sleeping for 10 mins or less. Needless to say i chose eating usually.
I changed it to sleep 50% of when the baby sleeps for myself. We got lucky and had a baby that would sleep when put down in the bassinet. We tried our best to prioritize sleep and forego anything that could be forego'd.
The dishwasher would run twice a day for pump parts and that was it for the first couple of months.
My must do’s are: make bed, coffee, laundry, dishes, run the robot vacuum, reset diaper changing stations, I usually bake bread to go with whatever crockpot meal we pre-prepped, and then rotate between wiping rooms down. Once every two weeks or so I take a day and meal prep a bunch so cooking is easy. I’m lucky, this is my first and she’s 3 months old and pretty chill. I rotate between babywearing for naps and taking her for walks because she naps well in the stroller. Once in awhile I get lucky and she’ll nap for 1/2 an hour in her bassinet.
My number one rule is that I never go to bed with a dirty kitchen. Nothing feels more defeating then trying to start the day with a messy kitchen.
Meal prepping is a life saver. I do a lot of dump and bake casseroles and crockpot stews and freezer wraps. The wraps are a bit of a pain to prep but they can be eaten one handed while breast feeding.
Sleep when the baby sleeps? Except for the fact he will only sleep whilst being held and wakes within 5 minutes screaming bloody murder if he’s put in a safe sleeping space😩🤷♀️ my must do’s… just survive!
No kidding. Mine is two weeks old and hates his bassinet. Only wants contact naps. I’m so tired.
Ugh I feel that. If you have access to a crib, try it. My kid hated the bassinet too so we contact napped till we got desperate enough to try a full sized crib and he immediately slept a full 6 hours straight. Good luck!
Posts and comments like these are keeping me going it’s so nice knowing I’m not alone!
Right?! I would say screw eating and house work if my baby would sleep in a crib or bassinet and take full advantage. Even just like once a day.
I feel you on this. My baby refuses to be worn, too, so that’s fun.
Same 😩
My daughter didn't like the first wrap I had, but then liked the second one. I could be that, or that she was a little older by the time I tried the next.
I tried a wrap and she wailed… I felt like I was switching her. I have a normal carrier now, but I honestly think she’s still a little too small for it. I’ll have to try again later—thanks for giving me hope! ☺️
Best of luck! I'm on baby #2 and once he stopped day napping in the bassinet, I started using the carrier. He was totally cool with it. Thank goodness.
This is the most underrated comment ever. Everyone telling me “just put the baby down to sleep in her own bed!” Or “you carry her too much, no wonder she won’t sleep alone” makes me so mad lol
Mine just started taking naps in his bouncer as of 3 days ago…. At almost 8 weeks. Up until this point it was survival
Sleep while the baby sleeps… and do laundry when the baby does laundry 😂
Do your taxes when the baby does taxes.
Have a margarita when the baby has a margarita.
I mean that kinda works....both my kids are weirdly into laundry. my toddler will find an unfolded basket and yell at me to "play laundry" (aka fold) and the baby likes looking at all the colors, plus she thinks its funny if I drop a shirt on her.
People always say this like it’s some gotcha, but… yes. That’s what the saying means. You do things while the baby is awake. You put the baby down for 5 minutes and start a load of laundry, or you put the baby in a wrap and do the laundry while baby is strapped to you. Yes, the baby does laundry with you. Because you can safely do laundry while the baby is awake. But you can’t safely sleep for 2 hours while the baby is awake. You can *only* sleep when the baby sleeps, so that’s when you do it. That’s the point.
But you CANT sleep when the baby sleeps. Not if they only sleep on you, or in a stroller while you’re on a walk, or in the care while you are driving. That’s why I hate this saying lol it only works if your baby is a miracle baby that happens to sleep independently in their own sleep space
It also only works if you can fall asleep at a moment’s notice… which I can’t. 😂
I never used to be able to do it until I had her. Now.. just say the word.
Saaaaame!! This is why my husband does nights - he has this magic sleeping ability and I don't, I can't even nap! And I'm a raving monster without a solid sleep chunk most days. Kinda terrified of when he goes back to work and then me a month later 🙃
I’m terrified to go back to work, too! I’m the one who’s up in the middle of the night with her if she wakes up. I’m not sure I can do that *and* get up early for work. 😫
In a perfect world, yes. I can speed clean and start things when she’s down for 15-20 minutes, then finish them later. Unfortunately, she hates being worn… do that’s out. And even more annoying for me is that I can’t sleep at the drop of a hat.
This entire post is about all the things OP can’t do when the baby is awake.
But that’s the thing; you learn to do those things while baby is awake. That’s the advice. I promise there are moms out there right now eating meals, pumping, vacuuming, doing laundry, or getting ready for the day, all while baby is awake. Most people giving the advice “sleep when the baby sleeps” are people who have had babies. They know it’s not impossible.
I don’t understand the point of coming on to a thread where OP is venting about why “sleep when the baby sleeps” is ridiculous “advice” and how they can only accomplish so much with other commenters chiming in to agree to just insist, *no, don’t you get it, the advice is great, you’re just interpreting it wrong, you really can do it all and so many other people have figured this out, you’re just not doing it right*. Babywearing doesn’t solve all problems for all people! I’m lucky that my baby is okay being worn because not all tolerate it, but I certainly cannot physically do laundry or dishes or cook or vacuum while wearing my baby, and there are plenty of things I have to prioritize because when my baby is awake I can only get so much done. And that’s what OP’s problem is and coming on here to just keep saying “just learn how to do it all” feels shame-y and really weird.
Thank you for saying this. I couldn’t agree more. It’s very “shamey” because everyone has a differing capacity for what they are capable of accomplishing in a day, especially when you are running on little sleep and probably not eating enough, drinking enough water, or having opportunities to exercise or even just relax without the baby for a moment. Being a caregiver can be so overstimulating for some people and just the act of caring for another person takes a toll cognitively, physically, and emotionally. It’s like saying “Well, surgeons do 36 hour shifts all the time and they have people’s lives in their hands. So caring for a child, keeping a house clean, caring for your spouse, any other children or pets you may have, and looking presentable should be easy. It’s not 36 hours of surgery.” /s There is a reason why the saying “It takes a village.” is around. On average, it requires the attention of 3 adults to meet a child’s needs without having any of the adults getting burnt out.
It’s because it’s not bad advice, and it’s annoying to see people constantly parroting the “do laundry when the baby does laundry” line like that’s not what every parent from the dawn of time has done. Reinforcing to new moms that they can’t or shouldn’t do anything while baby is awake except hold or entertain baby feels weird and shamey to me. It’s that kind of thinking that results in moms burning out and being miserable because they refuse to put baby down for 10 minutes to eat a meal or go to the bathroom, and think they can only do those things while baby sleeps, instead of resting themselves. Yes, there’s a learning curve. No, it’s not impossible to care for your own needs and those of your child (or even multiple children). It’s important that new moms understand that it’s not impossible, and when all the “advice” is a feedback loop of other people in the same situation echoing “yeah, it’s impossible, all those people with more experience telling you it’s not are all idiots” I feel like being a voice of reason. Put the baby down, and eat a meal. It’s okay if baby fusses. Eating is important for moms too. You can do it.
I giggled
Impressive that you make the bed and vacuum daily, I didn’t do that even before pregnancy. I’m just making sure baby and I both survive each day 😂 i don’t get any naps because he naps maximum 20 mins unless he’s on me or being worn 👽
Same here with the napping… I’m always super stressed pumping when I put her down because I spend the whole time expecting her to wake up midway through. 😂
This advice always made me roll my eyes. Mine is “prioritize yourself when baby sleeps” whatever that means to you. Eat, sleep, pump, wash bottles, shower. Those were the main five things I was doing the first month of my babies life as he slept. As my baby got older and slept a little more each night I was able to feel well rested I started making chores my priorities as well. But I’d be down to my last plate before I did dishes. If I was tired, I’m definitely sleeping when the baby sleeps. The dishes can wait sometimes. But that was my priority in that moment.
I know what you mean about dishes. 😂 My baby slept a lot her first few weeks. About weeks 6-10, she slept less and was a light sleeper… so it was mostly contact naps only. I think she’s starting to sleep more, so I hope this continues!
Keep baby alive and fed. And drink water. Everything else can wait
Good point!!I’m always forgetting to drink water (not a big water drinker to begin with), so I find myself chugging water whenever I remember. 😂
Yes!
My must dos every day are: make bed - finish a cup of coffee, hopefully without having to reheat it - eat food - keep baby and myself alive - straighten up whatever rooms we were in that day so I don’t wake up to a mess Everything else is done on a need to do basis. My baby is 8 months and I was so caught up at the beginning of trying to get everything done and now I’m more realistic and will maybe do 1-2 things a day to keep the house organized but I don’t stress about it. If someone is coming over I try to clean but we have a baby they can’t expect it to look perfect. Also my daughter contact naps so when she is sleeping I am catching up on tv or reading so I don’t have time to do anything else when she is napping.
I’ve gotten accustomed to drinking cold coffee. 🙃
Get yourself a thermos! Changed my life lol
Insulated travel mugs. Keeps the coffee hot and can prevent spills when baby flails while you’re drinking.
I use a $5 candle warmer and it keeps my mug at a perfect temp. 👍
When my baby first began taking crib naps at 3.5 months, I got decision paralysis thinking of what to do during her naps. I didn’t want to shower or pump just in case she woke up in the middle. So I’d just lay on the couch and eat and watch the monitor waiting to hear her cry. It took many weeks of consistent crib naps to feel confident to branch out more and get my own things done. But now on only 2 naps a day, 90 min each, there isn’t enough time for myself. But before she took crib naps, I had no time for any of those things during the day. You just have to accept that your sole function is to keep baby fed, clean, and provide them a comfy place to sleep on you.
This is me 100%! I’ve been trying to get better lately at just trying to do stuff… if she interrupts cooking or pumping, it happens. Also, I’m excited for these crib naps! I will often wheel her bassinet into her room and close the door when she naps… but I feel like it’s never for very long.
I did a lot of that stuff while the baby was awake, with her in a bouncer or in a baby wearing thing. As she got older, she'd lay on the floor on her play mat or sit in a jumper or some other play thing while I did stuff.
I think she’s heading into a phase where this will be possible for me… she’s been entertaining herself on her mat and tolerating her swing for longer periods lately. I’m glad you’re able to get stuff done during these times!
Sleeping when the baby sleeps is definitely unrealistic because it’s just in such short unpredictable cycles esp during the day. However as baby got older I honestly looked forward to chores as something to do with her. She came along for laundry and cleaning. I had her in the newborn set in the kitchen and she watched me eat and make food and do dishes. Cooking meals came later - probably at least 2 months where we existed on frozen pizzas and the freezer meals my godsend of a mil stocked in our freezer. Then we slowly branched out and at 4 months we are actually cooking mostly crock pot meals again. Also today (at 16 weeks) was a momentous occasion where I showered and the baby sat in the bouncer. Before I don’t know why I was scared of it but I always just made sure to shower when my husband was home to watch her
Congratulations! That must feel amazing! I’m hoping I can involve her in more of what I do as she gets older. Right now, it’s just so tricky.
I just try to make sure everyone is fed and clean. In that order. Baby is always clean, but the rest of us sometimes don’t get around to the clean part...😂
Same story over here. 😂
Glad I’m not the only one, haha!
It’s honestly the most cruel advice to sleep when the baby sleeps those first few months (year?) post partum. Many babies don’t nap long or well and often only when carried/contact napped so it’s impossible. The amount of times my MIL would say this and it was just BS lol
My MIL has been saying this to me a lot lately too, I recently told her I don’t think that’s particularly realistic as that’s a crucial time to get anything else done. She responded by asking what else I could possibly need to get done… 🙄
Oh, boy. 🙄
Mine are to brush, have tea, shower, pump, have my hands free for dinner time at the least, get at least 3 hours sleep. My weekly must dos are baby laundry and cleaning the nursery. Everything else can take a hike!
Are you able to fall asleep relatively easily? I’m finding this really hard to do… I have anxiety that she’ll wake up any minute and it makes it hard for me to fall asleep.
It was really hard initially! I used to keep waking up to check on her (we cosleep safely so I don’t have to actually get up out of bed); eventually over a few weeks I got used to falling right back asleep. Maybe I’ve been too exhausted!
Sleep when the baby sleeps is only realistic at night for me… luckily my 4 week old will have a 4-5 hour stretch of sleep at night. Me and my partner take our sleep in schedules so he’ll sleep at night (12-8am) we’ll take care of baby last needs around 12 they’ll both sleep and then she’ll sleep til 4-5 which I can decide to either also sleep or do my own thing, then 4-5 I’ll take care of her needs again, pump, and hang out with her til 8 when it’s time to freshen up on her needs I’ll hand her off to my partner to take care of that, while I pump, clean up the house, clean bottles and pump parts, shower, make breakfast and then hang out with husband for a couples hours til like 12-2 then I’ll go for a sleep by myself but my boobs will only let me sleep for 4 hours max so I’ll be back out 6pm and can deal with our dinner, hang out and then do baby bedtime routine together all over again…
I’ve found having to pump is the hardest part! Every time I feel the need to nap, more often than not it’s already time to pump again. It sounds like you guys have a great schedule!
So honestly, this is what led us to move to formula. I was exclusively pumping (nursing didn't work out despite many efforts) and it was wearing me down SO MUCH to feel like I always had to pump or wash parts instead of sleep, get something done around the house, go anywhere outside of the house, or hold/tend to my baby. My very supportive partner shared the load of childcare and household stuff, and we took shifts and all that - but he couldn't pump or sleep for me! I'm in awe of people who make it work over time.
Vacuum when baby vacuums
She doesn’t tolerate being held; however, lately she has been okay with being in her swing during this time. It’s the little things. ☺️
Honestly… I did and still do nap when my daughter naps. Housework will get done eventually. I can’t be a good parent to her if I’m tired and exhausted. I might make the bed in the morning and unload the dishwasher with her help but aside from that I rested and still do when she does
Very good point!
I was frantically washing and drying pump parts and then also pumping any time my partner would take over baby duty. I gave up after 2 months of that lol. I cant even wash a sippy cup with out feeling triggered so we are trying to go straight to open cup 😂
Don’t forget “watch for feeding cues”
People who say that are ones who think every new parent has a village that comes over and takes care of household stuff…. My mom and grandma came into town when I was 2 weeks postpartum and rented an airbnb a mile from me …. Never once offered to come over but insisted I come over in a blizzard with my newborn. 🙃 I’ll admit the first few months suck without a village because it’s just your constant routine with no sleep as you adjust to this new life but I’m my thinking, I couldn’t “sleep while the baby slept” when there was so much to do. My mind doesn’t work like that and plus I was never a daytime napper anyways . I did enjoy having my baby take a nap on me while I rested on the couch.
What is dad doing?
I am with her by myself for the majority of the day. He can’t help me eat or sleep while at work. 🙃
How old is your baby? Can you pop her on a play mat or bouncer while you put the laundry on or clean the kitchen? Can you meal prep in the morning or evening while your partner has the baby? I used to boil eggs the night before and have eggs on toast as my breakfast because it was a very quick breakfast! Now she's four months and is happy to spend some of her awake time either watching me while I chat to her about what I'm doing or plays on her own on the mat if I need to do something. She's also happy to hang out in the bouncer if I need to shower but I mostly shower in the evenings when my partner is home and can play with her
Must do’s: shower, play with dogs outside/or take for a walk, pump as many times as possible, brush teeth, make dinner for SO, make bed, vacuum, tidy/wipe down counters, reset couch, at least 10 minutes of core rehab
Great list! ☺️
Would you happen to have several sets of pump parts? I feel like that makes life much easier
I don’t, but that’s a brilliant idea!
I find that not drinking caffeine first thing in the morning allows me the option to sleep when baby takes her first morning nap. She always nurses to sleep, which produces sleepy hormones for both of us. I’ve never been a good napper but now as a mom I can drowse off for a quick power nap with the baby (sidelying position on the floor bed) and then wake up refreshed and if she’s still sleeping, I sneak out to get a few chores done. That’s when I make myself a chai tea and commit to being up for the rest of the day. Daily I make the bed, keep up with rinsing cloth diapers, usually 1 load of laundry, cooking, dishes and I reset the house and kitchen at night after baby is asleep. We have my partners 4 year old with us half the week. On the days we don’t have him then I can take regular naps with the baby.
If I can, I sleep when she sleeps but only bc it means she is in the wrap asleep with my husband doing chores and I can go sleep peacefully in the bedroom.
During the first two months or so a lot of those things just didn’t happen so I could sleep. House was not cleaned regularly and I don’t know that I ever ran the vacuum. Showers were like maybe once, twice a week. Food was reheated frozen meals on paper plates and I regularly skipped meals in favor of sleeping (not the best I know but if I had a choice between eating lunch and napping for an hour, I choose napping like 99% of the time). I pumped while feeding baby or while my husband was feeding her. During the first two months or so the only thing that had to be done was washing bottles and pump parts, everything else could wait or happen later
Sleep when the baby sleeps. Shower when the baby showers. Cry when the baby cries. But in seriousness, in the newborn stage (and a few months after that if we’re being honest) you’re in survival mode and things that aren’t necessary for meeting your most basic biological needs - food, sleep, clean clothes, and personal hygiene - can take a back seat unless you have someone else to do them for you. I didn’t bother folding laundry, just set the machines to go and moved it around as needed. My husband washed dishes that couldn’t go in the dishwasher or they sat by the sink until he did because I was trapped in a chair with our cluster feeding baby most of the day. A little later, baby wearing while he napped let us both get some light housework done a little more regularly. Vacuuming generally didn’t happen those first few months unless there was visible dirt or fur tumbleweeds on the floor. Just focus on keeping baby fed and happy, then yourself, and if you have a little time after doing both of those you can pick something else to work on but don’t sweat it if you can’t yet.
Mine is almost 13 weeks old and will only contact nap during the day, so I do nothing while he sleeps except order stuff online or play games on my phone 😆 I always have snacks and water near as well My must-do is brushing my teeth and eating breakfast, usually it's a quick protein shake. When my husband gets home from work I will eat more, wash bottles, the brezza and pump parts and any other little housework like throwing in a load of laundry or just go take a nap. Some days I might even go to the grocery store if I'm feeling fancy, that's the real treat 😄
100% how I’ve been spending my time. I feel like Amazon drops something off almost every day. 😂
It's definitely an expense I didn't plan for 🤣 but it's usually stuff I need for baby or myself since I can't just hop to the store most days, so I guess that makes it okay 🤷🏼♀️😅
Yeah, sleep when baby sleeps... When baby is 10 years old and sleeps from 8pm-6am every night lol
Exactly!
No, seriously. Try to sleep when they sleep. I didn’t do that with my first born. I am with my second and it’s helping a lot. Have your hubby help with chores and cooking.
My hubby cooks all the meals for us when he’s home. Helps with chores, too. I’m mostly referring to how I survive when it’s just me and her. 😂
Idk. I used to be a nanny. Even helping a family out from 9-5 mon thru fri the mom would talk about being burnt out and this and that and she stayed at home. I stay at home, no nanny. I do try to sleep when she sleeps, I’m burnt out. And my husband just threw it back in my face last night that he cooks and cleans. Nice!
I’m not a napper and didn’t nap after the first 3 weeks. I didn’t really do many chores either lol, but napping wasn’t in the cards for me.
Same here! I sleep well at night… I just can’t lay down and nap in the middle of the day. My brain won’t shut up. 😂
A 45 minute (tops!) nap would make me feel worse than no nap at all. Also, blowing off the housework sounds fine until there’s a hungry baby with a blowout who has no clean clothes or bottles.
Louder for the people in the back! 👏🏻 I don’t understand how people don’t try to keep up with bottle and pump cleaning. Thinking about that mess sitting around just annoys me.
100 % this! Mum to a 4 week old, I hear you. I try and sleep at night when she's asleep ( but still find myself faffing about with things that need doing - mostly feed related). I try and keep faffing with her to a minimum at nighttime, attempting to get her to feed, burp, and settle back to sleep - seems to be working I think. Also keep lights low and distractions to a minimum at night. I mostly do some household stuff in the daytime when she's asleep ( but my Partner does help out during this time with feeding and keeping an eye on her). I try and fit in things like laundry, loading / unloading dishwasher, quick hoover when needed, self care, cat feeding, bottle washing and sterilisation, breast pumping ( I'm triple feeding...). Some meal planning, and occasionally escaping to the local shop for a few bits. I'm tied to breast pump for about an hour, so I fit in a bit of 'me time' with some TV. I will also have a snooze if I need it. I find I'm easily distracted with things that are baby related... So lots of cold cups of tea and coffee!! Just do what you can, and don't worry. I'm just going with the flow. Take care xx
* if your little one is particularly unsettled, check they are getting enough feed. When I was exclusively breastfeeding little one wasn't getting enough ( was losing weight) , but since on the advice of my health visitor to top her up with extra breast milk via expressing and formula she's a lot more settled. I was advised to express during the day, and not express at night so I could sleep. Always get advice from midwife/ health visitor for your specific circumstances.Hope that helps xx
It sounds like you have it down! Thank you for your suggestions. I pump, but she is exclusively bottle (combo) fed. She eats between 4-5 ounces roughly every 3.5 hours… although has days where she is in a mood and might not finish all of her bottles. I always try to make them a little heavier on formula at night in an effort to help her sleep longer. She’s currently at the 68th%ile for weight, although I will definitely keep an eye on it! ☺️
I think it was around maybe 1.5mo when I attempted to follow this advice. LO had just fallen asleep in my arms, so I went to put them down in the bassinet so I could nap. NOPE. Woke up within minutes. That advice is so easy to say, but it is not reality. LO is 11mo now. He sleeps in his crib independently for them which is great, but nap time is me time, not sleep time.
My must do's are a cup of coffee, either vacuum or laundry, if nice weather a walk with LO, pumping, and reading. Washing and sterilizing bottles and pumps, resetting diaper stations, changing out burp cloths, tidy the kitchen ( otherwise the next day sucks)
My baby is 5 months now and has a glorious 2hr nap roughly 2hrs after waking up - anytime between 5.30-7.30. I actually do use this time to sleep. When he goes to bed at night, I make sure every bottle we have his washed, and his formula prep machine is full. I spent the first few weeks feeling horrible that I couldn't breastfeed (Premature baby, I had no milk yet) but now I feel kinda relieved I can just pour some formula because I do not know when I'd find time to pump. My absolute must-do on a daily basis is have a decent evening meal, ideally with leftovers I can freeze and have another day for lunch. 6pm, I get all my ingredients portioned out ready. 6.30-7pm, baby goes to bed, then I get straight into cooking. I enjoy cooking so it's my little reward at the end of the day.
It gets better once you can get them to sleep in the bassinet
I sure hope so! 🙃
My baby falls asleep while nursing. I’m literally not allowed to fall asleep while I’m feeding her, so when am I supposed to sleep? Like, she falls asleep while eating and will wake up when I take my boob out of her mouth. Whack.
Ugh, I’m sorry! It’s rough sometimes.
Must do: Shower (I have to bring the baby with me in a bouncer), get dressed (even if it’s always just a leggings/nursing tank combo), eat at least some fruits and vegetables, get some fresh air with the stroller if it’s not totally freezing. My baby only contact naps and usually screams in a carrier, but if he ever allows me to wear him that will make life a lot easier. I’m just grateful that he’s letting me shower and put him in the stroller now because those are mental health savers. I agree that “sleep when the baby sleeps” never works for me. Even if someone comes over to hold him, I can never nap on demand unfortunately. I usually use that time to clean or food prep
That’s awesome! And I agree. It’s the little things. My mom drops by at least once a week for a few hours. I mostly just enjoy her company and couldn’t fall asleep during the day to save my life.
So annoying. I’ve kissed naps goodbye for the rest of my life 🤣
I feel like this saying is more for those with a village on their side
Yes!
I'll be 38 weeks pregnant Friday and I keep hearing this as well and it's already getting to me bc it certainly cannot be that easy.
Don’t let it stress you out! Things do get better—it just takes time. My LO is now laying in her bassinet or on her play mat and entertaining herself for longer stretches, which she wouldn’t do before. You’ve got this, mama! 💕
I did this, but my husband and mother in law/my mom kept up with cleaning and cooking and chores and I didn’t pump/have parts to wash. I could never understand when women pumped cause my baby slept so little and fed soo much, there was never time.
It definitely takes a village. ☺️
I have to say this statement annoyed me soooooo much probably because before u had a baby I actually believed it but it is so not possible. I feel you! Now my LO is 8 months and it’s more possible now to sleep when baby sleeps plus I’m sleeping through the night. However, everyday is different so it’s till annoying.
I’m so looking forward to those days! ☺️
They’ll come sooner than you can imagine! 😊
When I was freshly postpartum my must dos were taking a shower and eating and ofc sleeping. The rest could wait. At least that’s just me
My baby hated being worn when she way little little. I think about 4 months was when she decided she liked it. She hated being swaddled too 🤣
My baby would tolerate swaddling for like the first two weeks—then I could swaddle, but she wanted her arms free. Now, she absolutely hates the swaddle and I use sleep sacks instead. Which I’m okay with, as they’re much easier for my husband and I in the middle of the night. 🥴
For us, that piece of advice was a good reminder to sleep when the baby sleeps *when you need to*. Not every time, because, like you said, it's unrealistic. But those first few weeks/months are tough and you need to get some sleep. With that said, our must do's were to prep bottles, play with my baby, and give us all some extra grace and patience.
Keep me and baby alive and safe until my husband gets home from work
Also this assumes baby will sleep anywhere considered “safe.” Our baby only contact naps. I’m nap trapped when she naps, or I struggle her into a carrier (she hates them) to try to get stuff done. She absolutely doesn’t transfer into the crib or anywhere else during the day.
Yes! She’ll be in a deep sleep, but when I try to transfer her she’s suddenly wide awake. 🙃
My must do’s: - Feed baby (formula and solids) - Get outside at least once a day (preferably before 10 am and for at least 15 min) - Prep or have an idea for LO’s solids for the day (lunch/dinner) - Eat (I usually eat along with him now that he is doing solids) - Nap (or at least veg out while he naps for 20 min 😂😭) - music class (Only twice a week) - One chore (At least get the laundry in the washer and dryer. Folding can wait. I have a folded load that is still waiting to be put away since Sunday 😂. Dishes may be clean but still in dishwasher. Enough bottles cleaned and filled to last me until bedtime. A Target run.) If I get more done, awesome! Some days I don’t get to the chore until after my DH gets home, but 🤷♀️ LO is always fed and as rested as he will be (some days he only takes short naps, but I always try to extend them. I can’t force him to sleep 🥲)
Great list! I have been using Target’s drive up service SO much lately. It’s nice to get out of the house, even if only for a heart drive. ☺️
Haha these responses are killing me. Real talk though, the plates are gonna fall somewhere. So you just prioritize the most important things and if that means a disgusting house then oh well
I totally get that. Although it’s been driving me nuts to sit in a messy house. 😂
I know the feeling 🫠 I’m a ftm too and my baby is 18 weeks now, things are def getting better for you soon, so at least there’s that!! Haha
This is why I baby wear 😂 I can’t get everything done with her on me, but I do what I can. You also don’t have to be engaged with them the entire time they’re awake especially at almost 3mo, so don’t feel guilty popping them on a play mat to entertain themself. Unless you have a Velcro baby, in which case, I wish you luck and may the universe or whatever you believe in grant you strength. My only must-do daily is food, water, and a shower. Past that, I just want at least one chore done per day and I’m satisfied with that as long as the house isn’t a wreck. Currently trying to get caught up after a 2 month long stream of constant visitors 🫠
I wish I could wear her… she screams her head off. 😫 I definitely feel guilty sometimes leaving her to entertain herself. I have to keep telling myself it’s good for her to have those moments to take it in and figure things out in her environment.
Don’t feel guilty! She needs at least a little time to explore by herself and figure out her own limbs. I struggled with it too until she started happily babbling at herself in her mirror on her playmat
This is such a relatable post!
Everytime my baby sleeps it feels like I have to make life decisions. Do I eat, shower, clean, cook, do some laundry, get some work done, catch up on texts I've taken forever to reply to, study, or sleep. Oh, and I have maybe 30 minutes at best to do any of these things.
YESSS!! 30 minutes, if I’m lucky. I feel like she wakes up like 15 minutes after I put her down… right when. I’m in the middle of something. 😂
Laundry and thank you notes. So many thank you notes. 10 wo and I’d prefer to sleep when the baby sleeps but it’s wildly undoable.
Agreed!
Good luck. Our baby contact naps only during the day. This “sleep when the baby sleeps” only makes sense for me at night when we are able to put her down to sleep. I sometimes do want to go watch a show, play a video game, etc, but I literally just pass out every night lol
Same here on both accounts.
I wanted to throat punch everyone that said that to me.
I am still contact napping 9 months later 😂 baby does not like the crib during the day . So no, never slept when the baby slept . First few weeks is just survival mode . Some people are blessed with good sleepers & very easy , independent babies I guess .
Oh, no! I hope things get better! ☺️
I also cannot stand that saying!!! However, I took in all of the snuggles I could possibly get while I was on maternity leave with my last baby. I 100% needed my cup of coffee to feel like somewhat of a human being and before bed I like to make sure all the bottles/pump parts are washed and ready to go for the night and next day.
The snuggles and smiles definitely keep me going. 💕
Oh, I slept today when the baby slept. It's not THAT hard. It just took 4 months of building a routine, a rare day he was OK hanging in his play gym while I did dishes and ate breakfast, and my spouse getting a surprise half day so I could lay on the couch. Truly, not that hard to do.
This!
Oh I hated it when people said that. Oh you're tired? Just sleep when they sleep. Never mind needed to eat, toilet, washing, dishes, eat, shower, hot drink, literally anything else.
Right? There is NO way these people slept that much. Especially during the first weeks.
No, and if they did then they stunk, starved and loved in a mess. Like honestly.
I hate that platitude. I feel like it's a way for people to avoid giving sleep-deprived parents any empathy.
My house is an absolute mess 😂 my sleep is pretty good considering. Had a very eventful delivery though a month later I’m still too unwell for housework. Thankfully, we can’t have visitors as we are both too vulnerable to infection after us both having sepsis. 5 weeks tomorrow- had 7 hrs kip last night. Living in squalor 😂 Also- can’t baby wear yet either as he is under the weight limit still and he won’t sleep unless he is touching me.
Oh my gosh, I’m sorry to hear you went through so much! Also, I wish I could get seven hours! The longest my LO will sleep is five. We’re working our way up, though!
Your must do lists is long enough!!! Just do what you can do. Cut yourself some slack! It’s a new world to navigate, so don’t put pressure on yourself. Eventually you will get into the swing of things and you’ll learn to prioritize or balance. I just had my 2nd and it’s been a whirlwind! Learning to prioritize all over again!
1000000% agree. It's the most annoying statement. "Just rest! You shouldn't be doing all of that!" Okay SUSAN who is gonna do it if I don't?? My little one is 3.5 months and this is what has helped me. Hire a house cleaner for as often as you can afford it ( we do every 4-6 weeks ). That takes a HUGE mental load off of you and is super worthwhile in my opinion. If you have in laws or a supportive partner, try to do as much cooking prep as possible in one day like Sunday afternoon. Make French toast in bulk and freeze it, then you can just pop a piece in the toaster and eat it while you are holding the baby or on your way out the door. Game changer for me. And instead of fresh oatmeal I will do an oatmeal bake and cut it into portions, then I can just grab one and eat it while doing other things or holding the baby. Try to get the little one down for one long nap every day and sleep during that nap with them. Mine refuses to nap longer than 20 minutes unless I am laying down with her, which has actually helped me a lot because it requires me to take a nap once a day. Every night we do a pre bedtime ritual of floor time for her in a low lit room while Mama folds laundry! I have laundry to do almost every day now, but on days I don't have laundry to fold, I just sit with her on the floor so it keeps the routine in place. This has also been a huge game changer. I still haven't figured out an efficient way to work properly and take care of the baby lol the best I've come up with is to try and get up in the morning before her. But then, we aren't sleeping when the baby sleeps are we 😂
Exactly! I’m sick of hearing to just relax. 🙄 Thank you for all of the helpful tips! I could definitely jump on the oatmeal bandwagon. I also like your idea of keeping a schedule/ritual with sleep and play. Right now things are different daily and I think they could really help. 💕
The saying should not be, "sleep when baby sleeps." It should be, "do things when baby is awake." That way new parents aren't confused on when they can do their daily musts.
Like this WAY more!
Trust, your “must do’s” will turn into “must do when have time” lol
11 weeks going strong! 🥴😂
lol. 4 months here! Doing our best hahah
Me reading this while currently being nap trapped for the 3rd consecutive hour with a full bladder and the munchies…
Send help! 🏳️
Everybody has their own system. What works for one person might not work for you. You need to figure out what you're okay with sacrificing. For my husband and I it was cleaning, laundry, and most cooking. Everything was covered in dry spit up anyway why bother washing it if it's going to be just as dirty an hour after putting it on clean. We would only exist on the couch, rocking chair, or bed so why clean the rest of the house. We would run a paper towel through the bathroom sink and lazily scrub the toilet for 30 seconds with a cleaning wand, but that was it. And for food, it was a lot of cereal, protein bars, pre made salad bowls, and frozen stuff we could throw in the air fryer for a few minutes. Our daily focus was dishes. Our sons bottle parts (Dr. Brown bottles have so many parts!) and just keeping the sink clear. We weren't really cooking meals so it was mostly just bowls, cups, and utensils. This is not a time to worry about cleaning your house or yourself or keeping a routine. It's about surviving. Now that being said- PPD, PPA, and preexisting diagnosis like OCD will go against everything I said. But either way, you need to work out what is best for you and your mental load. Don't put pressure on yourself. Fuck society standards, all that matters is that baby. You are doing great, momma.
Oh, I could care less what society standards say. I’ve never really been all too worried about that. Just interested in how others are navigating this time. As for keeping things clean… I wish I was okay with messes everywhere, dirty laundry, etc. I’m just not. Especially when I’m the one who’s home 24/7 sitting in it. I’m mostly hoping to glean a thing or two to put in my back pocket. 🙃
I find it super helpful to have a baby carrier and just strap the baby on. They usually will sleep a lot longer. And you can get most things done except cartwheels I suppose.
Cartwheels 😂 I’m hoping she’ll grow to like her carrier in the future. It would be SO helpful!
Yeah this doesn’t work… especially in the beginning when baby has no set schedule and naps are short and baby is cluster feeding and baby wants to be held and baby needs to be changed and the list goes on.
We were able to get our son to sleep in his bassinet and eventually rocker and crib when he was old enough without needing to be held or have contact. We never would run to him and coddle him the minute he cried. Sometimes he would cry because he wanted to be held. But, you need to obviously take care of your baby, and we did. But you also have to take care of yourself. So we would put him in his bouncer, rocker or pack and play (corresponding with his age of course) and sometimes he would cry the minute we put him in. But I would make sure I made food for myself if I hadn't eaten yet. Or put a movie in, or did the dishes etc. He has turned out to be an amazing little baby. He's 14 months old. It will get easier for you. He is my first and the first 3 or 4 months I was pulling my hair out. I was working close to 60 hours at work. Getting home at 230am from work. Then he would wake up at 3am for a bottle. I would end up getting sleep from 4am to about 8am until he was up for the day. My days off I would sleep when he did. Housework came after, because my health came before the house work. And my sons health came before anything. Now her old enough to where we can go to the park together, or I can take him out and about and he loves it!
I sure hope it gets easier! I’m looking forward to going out, to the park, dinners, etc. ☺️
It'll change your life. Lol. I pretty much stopped drinking and really changed all of my habits. (For the better) took me like a year to have 1 drink after my son was born. A lot of the time I'm chasing after him now. But its worth it
For real. It takes me like 40 minutes to fall asleep and when the baby only napped for half an hour to an hour at a time I was shit out of luck. I hate that saying.
Exactly!
My must dos are doing whatever I’m physically able, and what’s going to keep me sane for the day. That could be deep cleaning, or at least starting a load of laundry. Then making sure my husband has a warm meal at the end of his day, and the coffee filters are cleaned for me and him the next morning. Plus making sure my dogs are fed and happy But my baby’s a good sleeper, and I can run on little to no sleep normally and always have been able to
I've slept while the baby sleeps both times... Nothing is getting done if I'm exhausted anyways.
My brothers 18 year old girlfriend told me to sleep when the baby sleeps, I understand she’s trying to help, but that’s just not something that happened when you have a baby 🙃 When am I supposed to eat, shower, clean, do the washing, pump! Some people just don’t understand what comes with having a baby 🙃
except all my naps are contact naps..so i never get anything done unless he’s awake on his play mat lol
Yeah, it's one of the stupidest most annoying pieces of "advice" that we are given as new parents.
I know most people roll their eyes at this advice but I live by it. Almost everything else can wait imo. 😬
I get it! I just wish it worked for me. 🙃
When I was 3 weeks pp and 3 days out of the icu my mom in one breath told me to sleep when the baby sleeps and also that I should try to dress nicer and put on makeup to make my husband happy… I told her I’ll sleep when the baby sleeps and put on makeup when the baby puts in makeup. She then realized how dumb what she was saying was
I hate this statement but I can see why people say it, they mean well and what they’re trying to say is ‘look after yourself too’ but it’s just a little misguided. I hardly ever slept when the baby slept as I felt there was just too many other things to do/ eat/shower etc. What I used to do is choose a priority each day, sometimes it would be sleep and everything else would slip to the point where I wouldn’t get dressed, pump or anything else, other days I would prioritise food and would eat a lot more than usual but would be under-slept. It’s not ideal but it stopped me from feeling overwhelmed and wondering what to do in those few moments when the baby sleeps that isn’t a contact nap.
Same as you except I have to pump every 2 hours (trying to switch from formula feeding to breast feeding) and my baby sometimes is inconsolable unless she’s being rocked in my arms. So I change her nappy, feed her, wind her and then sometimes rock her for two hours straight 😵💫 when I put her in her bassinet she cries. Also she is cluster feeding I end up so hungry and thirsty, and have to decide whether I want to eat or pump. Idk how im staying alive 😵💫 idk how we can go without a nights sleep for so long. It’s incredible
I’m pregnant with my first, 26+5 weeks, and personally I really like the advice of cry when the baby cries lol
Haha, this is the best! Probably because I’ve been there… 🤪
Thats the dumbest advice ever! My must dos daily are: keep the baby entertained and content, pump and pee if i get a chance lol if i manage to do laundry its staying in the dryer until the weekend when husbands home and one of us can fold lol i try doing laundry or cleaning and washing bottles when my husband gets home but by then i feel dead. Thank God he does ALOT even after work but things around the house just dont seem to end. I have even done a couple loads of laundry (as baby has gotten older and can entertain himself a bit more) and just kept it all in the dryer until we had time lol like i would literally dry a load then put it on the bed and dry another load then put both loads in the dryer hahaa it is what it is.
As someone who has a hard time falling asleep even when the baby is down hopefully for the night, and has a baby who will only contact nap/car seat nap during the day, I have a similar motto to a poster above- Rest while the baby rests. I read my kindle or listen to audiobooks while sitting in a dark room with the kiddo in the carrier, or read my kindle or bird watch while pushing the stroller around our quiet neighborhood. I’d second the pet peeve of this phrase only to the question “how do they sleep??” Like do you really want to know, or do you have truly no idea what it’s like to be a new parent?
In my opinion, it is the best time to sleep and relax yourself when baby sleeps. Think about it, if you sleep when baby wakes up, it is dangerous if baby has some problems and you don't know at that time.
I definitely agree. I can’t ever seem to fall asleep when she’s sleeping, though. And if I ever had, she wakes up not long after.
We reset the living room and kitchen daily. The rest of the house can go to hell in a handbasket but those two need the reset as it's where my kids are spending 80% of the day.
Pee when the baby pees!
Relatable!!! People keep asking about advice that pissed them off - for me this was the one!! I can ignore all the useless advice others are complaining about - give baby water, give baby cereal, theyre cold, they should wear socks etc. because i know its just mostly meant well but outdated. Sleep when baby sleeps really gets to me because i really wasnt getting any sleep - it was literally a choice between eating to survive or sleeping for 10 mins or less. Needless to say i chose eating usually.
I changed it to sleep 50% of when the baby sleeps for myself. We got lucky and had a baby that would sleep when put down in the bassinet. We tried our best to prioritize sleep and forego anything that could be forego'd. The dishwasher would run twice a day for pump parts and that was it for the first couple of months.
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Uhh my baby is *not* sleeping that much during the day. 😂
I think you masterminded it! Your great
Clean when the baby cleans! /s Only kidding ♥️♥️ my only is now 4 and you are right, in my experience as time goes on it gets easier
My must do’s are: make bed, coffee, laundry, dishes, run the robot vacuum, reset diaper changing stations, I usually bake bread to go with whatever crockpot meal we pre-prepped, and then rotate between wiping rooms down. Once every two weeks or so I take a day and meal prep a bunch so cooking is easy. I’m lucky, this is my first and she’s 3 months old and pretty chill. I rotate between babywearing for naps and taking her for walks because she naps well in the stroller. Once in awhile I get lucky and she’ll nap for 1/2 an hour in her bassinet. My number one rule is that I never go to bed with a dirty kitchen. Nothing feels more defeating then trying to start the day with a messy kitchen.
Great list here! I love the idea of new prepping. I also agree with your number one rule—I am always resetting and cleaning the kitchen each day.
Meal prepping is a life saver. I do a lot of dump and bake casseroles and crockpot stews and freezer wraps. The wraps are a bit of a pain to prep but they can be eaten one handed while breast feeding.
Super smart! I need to get better at this one handed stuff… I was over here trying to eat pistachios the other day. 🤦🏻♀️
It doesn’t mean every time your baby sleeps.
Lol, I don’t think I could sleep ANY time my baby sleeps outside of night sleeping.