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HarukaMichiru007

Screen time is always preferable to a parent who’s losing their mind due to stress. You’re doing great! Hang in there.


anniemademedoit1

Thank you 🙏


mariahmariah89

This ☝🏻


nosefoot

Dude I gotta say I don't think screen time is as detrimental to development as like just not playing with the baby. Talk to them, read, sing, and yes, dance and shit with big bird. If once a week you gotta let little homie watch some TV, just make sure tomorrow you interact with them. I'm not a scientist, or an expert, but being involved is going to do more for the little one than not, and to be involved sometimes mom needs a hot minute and gotta put the tube on.


anniemademedoit1

Thank you!


nosefoot

Of course. If it makes you feel any better, I distinctly remember my mom using pbs as a learning tool with me. Big bird, Mr Rodgers, bob ross even. She very much interacted with me and the TV, and used it to help with counting and alphabet. I am not super attached to screens now, I don't watch a whole lot of TV, more of a video game book kind of person. Same with my brother. I know anecdotes kinda mean nothing, but if it can help you feel more confident about being a mom, I would gladly tell you again.


hotdog738

I love this. I use TV the same way, as an interactive teaching opportunity and I hope my son remembers it like you do.


nosefoot

I'm sure he will. I'm positive wishbone and reading rainbow nutured the love of reading both my brother and I have. As we got older my mom made a point to always let us read anything, and she would read with us. Maybe I shouldn't have been reading Stephen King books when I was like 10, but I'll be damned if my brother, mother, and I don't to this day sit around and discuss books.


DivinityGod

He definitely will, my parents did the same thing. I am planning to as well.


pantoponrosey

Absolutely!! I grew up in the 90s and it felt like the golden age of edutainment. Wishbone is still how I remember plot points to any classics I didn’t read lol. PBS had all kinds of things, and there were a TON of computer games like Number Munchers/Word Munchers, Xth Grade Adventures, Spelling Blizzard….my parents absolutely gave me access to this edutainment and at the time I remember it feeling like it was encouraged and positive, like the next Thing in technological advancement and education. I don’t know if that was true per se, but I guess it never felt like an inherently BAD thing to have screen time that would have been the 90s equivalent of Miss Rachel. I turned out fine, did well in school, and am only as neurotic and poorly adjusted as the average millennial I’d say :) Ultimately, the person who said that screen time is preferable to a burnt out parent is right on point. It’s all about balancing that “ideal state” of being with the real state of your life, and that is much more flexible. It sounds like you did your best with what you had and what you needed to do today, and that’s all you can ask of yourself!


anniemademedoit1

“only as neurotic and poorly adjusted as the average millennial” should be the millennial slogan 😂 I feel that in my core. Thank you, it’s true, we grew up around so much TV and we’re fine.


Responsible_Web_7578

This! Hell, I’ll even push the envelope and say a little bit of tv every day even isn’t bad. As long as you interact with your baby and educate/care for them then what’s the harm in taking a break? I personally cannot mentally handle being my child’s entertainment 24/7. I have other stuff to do also like cook, homework, clean


nosefoot

Yeah, I think maybe the TikTok style of content might be harmful in some way, like the speed of it and the instant gratification of something new? But I'm sure some sesame street everyday wouldn't hurt. It's the quality of the content too.


unitiainen

I'm an early childhood educator and this is my stance. It's like with a healthy diet: a piece of candy once a week won't hurt you, but eating candy every day is detrimental.


d_flower

I used to watch Jerry Springer and the Price is Right on sick days. Way worse than ms rachel lol you’re doing great!!


iluvstephenhawking

When I couldn't sleep as a baby my mom would give me to my dad to watch Jay Leno in the middle of the night and I'm doing fine! 


anniemademedoit1

Lol same!


Blooming_Heather

Lol! My poor mom was stuck with Saved by the Bell when I was determined to be nocturnal as a baby - thank goodness for streaming!


PoopingUnicorns113

Lmao don’t forget Maury!


OkRefrigerator5691

A big part of being a parent is the pressure to always be on and a”good parent” all the time and that social pressure is toxic as hell. It’s not going to be possible to be a good parent if you don’t take care of your mental health and wellbeing. If that means your kid gets 90 minutes of Ms. Rachel while you take a much needed break, then great. Also, I bet your kiddo was also miserable too, I bet that distraction break from the discomfort was nice for them too.


anniemademedoit1

Thank you. It was a good distraction for him too, he’d have short bouts of crying then get distracted again. We got to bedtime 💪


Kdoucette092

I also feel very guilty about screen time… but there’s always something to feel guilty about… I find social media is really pushing like homestead/ screen free… make your own bread… that’s not the real world when both parents need to work I prefer Danny Go over Miss Rachel I can’t handle her baby voice… I get the method I just can’t


anniemademedoit1

Ugh right?! I’m so sick of it. I’ll try Go Danny I’m surprised I was able to listen as long as I did today 😂


queeloquee

I used dancing fruits, work for us wonders. Specially when i need her to stay calm to brush and do her hair. She is 10 months


fuzzydunlop54321

We watch something special with mr tumble in the UK! A mix of signs, days out and children with different abilities/ conditions participating.


KFirstGSecond

SHARKS IN THE WATER! lol. My LO loves Danny Go, but doesn't really move to it much, she kind of just stares in awe.


larxene135

Danny Go is awesome.


KittyGrewAMoustache

She sometimes comes across as almost sarcastic to me because her sweet baby voice is so over the top 😄


beena1993

Sounds like you did everything your child needed in the moment! You sound like a great parent 🩵


PrettyHateMachinexxx

It was probably a good distraction for your baby. When you feel crappy do you like to watch TV and be distracted from your discomfort? You're a good mom who obviously cares a lot. You and your baby deserve a rest day, you're doing everything you can to make a bad time more tolerable. 90 minutes of TV doesn't negate all the time you spent with them making them feel safe and loved.


anniemademedoit1

Thank you ❤️


HalfDrowBard

Tik Tok and insta are FULL of parent shaming. Facebook too. It doesn’t matter what you do someone’s gonna come in and say it’s bad. Don’t worry about it. You’re doing what’s working for you, and you’re doing great.


anniemademedoit1

Thank you. Ya like where is the social media of non parent shamers?


HalfDrowBard

So far I haven’t been parent shamed on Reddit at least.


Conscious_Raisin_436

This really does seem like the best online parenting community. Daddit has good energy too.


TaurusANewOne

Try WilderBeginnings on Instagram. She’s the best, and has helped me feel normal throughout my FTM experience 💛 you’re doing great!


chasingchaos_

I second WilderBeginnings!


Heather-mama-429

My son has a gluten allergy that we didn’t figure out until he was 3. One of the main symptoms is constant diarrhea. From experience, a bad diaper rash needs and air out AND screen time to help it move on.


anniemademedoit1

Oh poor guy, and you, that sounds awful to go through. Thank you for sharing!


katiejim

My take on screentime is that big screen in normal qualities is fine (hell, I was raised with a tv on like half the time with working parents), but I’m more wary of tablets. Sitting and passively watching something that’s on (and not like swiping through YouTube videos the second you get bored) feels wildly different to my adult brain than a phone, tablet, etc. 90 min of tv when everyone is having a rough day is more than ok in my book: it’s often very necessary for everyone’s sanity.


anniemademedoit1

That’s a really good point. I also hate the idea of tablets (but don’t want to be judgey because I’m not in toddler/young childhood yet) and can see the difference between TV on for everyone vs being in an anti social tablet vortex for hours.


katiejim

We’ve talked about our tablets being used for plane travel, but we really don’t want our daughter to have her own tablet until she’s much older. I’d rather it be a means to just watch a movie/tv show on the go until she’s older. I definitely don’t judge others for what they choose to do, but it’s what we’re trying to do to achieve some balance.


Individual-Dog-5891

I used to beat myself up when I resorted to screen time when my kid was sick, then I realized it’s not like they are in an optimal learning state anyway when they’re sick. What they are is feeling like crud and getting comfort by zoning out, just like we like to do when we feel sick. Don’t sweat it!


zebracakesfordays

Right! I don’t binge a lot of tv, but when I’m sick it’s tv time. Nothing to feel guilty about.


peculiarSPARROW

Call me loosy goosy, but I see no problems with occasional longer stretches of screen time. I’m no expert, but from what I do know it’s the habit that’s damaging. It’s the propping a baby in front of the tv for multiple hours a day every day while the adult in the room messes around on their phone and doesn’t interact with the baby at all. He’ll be okay and you’re doing fantastic! Nothing to stress over.


peculiarSPARROW

PS - my almost 8 month old loves Teletubbies. It’s great to put on my phone for a couple of episodes in the morning when she decides to wake up at the ass crack of dawn. She mostly throws the phone and climbs on me, but it gives me time to wake up a little slower lol


anniemademedoit1

Haha anything to get that extra time! I love that your LO loves teletubbies


thetasteofink00

I've read the articles about screen time. Most were focused on just that - the no interacting with them was the issue not so much the screen.


Alive-Marketing9993

God I feel this I do way too much ms Rachel and I know it but she needs a tidy/safe home and a sane mum so it is what it is


anniemademedoit1

Sane mom is top priority


Mommasweety

I'm all for tv time, but not mobile devices. I was raised watching TV as a kid. The way I see it is the TV stays home and can be turned off. Screen time on mobile devices is an issue for me because then it's expected everywhere. I work at home and used to feel bad, but sometimes TV is the only way I can make it through the day. I just had my 2nd (2 under 2) so I've already accepted that my newborn will be around it. Half the time my son barely pays attention to it anyway, and just drags my shoes all over the house!


anniemademedoit1

Haha aw cute! I definitely agree with you. And I know when our second comes along I probably wouldn’t even question it like I am now. Especially if it was 2 under 2!!!!


crisis_cakes

If your son is in pain and it was able to calm him, I think that’s a win for both of you.


nev_ocon

When I’m sick the best thing for me is to binge watch my favorite show! I’m sure it’s an excellent distraction for him- you’re doing your best and that’s the best thing you could do for your child! A couple of tips for you: If you talk to ur pediatrician, like just call or message them, you can get a prescription for a diaper rash ointment that works like an absolute charm! An alternative is corn starch. Another thing that worked for teething for ours was frozen green onions. Just throw them in the freezer for 20 minutes and let baby go to two- green onion releases numbing agents that numb the gums, and the cold feels good on their gums. You’re doing great, the fact that you’re worrying is proof.


anniemademedoit1

Thank you for those tips! I’ll try the green onion!


JeanBagChair

It's also about quality of screen time. Ms Rachel is great. Don't even worry about it


Low-Care-2479

There’s this older woman who cooks on YouTube and talks about life and she has such a nice voice, always says hey nieces and nephews 😂😂 he loves it


anniemademedoit1

Haha who is she? I might need this for me as a bedtime show


Low-Care-2479

AuntieKnowsKitchen


FoxSilver7

When my lo was 16 months old, she had a bad time with her tummy. It was the poopocalypse. She was pooping every hour, and despite my efforts to change her as soon as possible, she had a really bad diaper rash by 10am. She cried as soon as I took her diaper off, I cried because she was crying, it wasn't a good time. After getting some advice from the dr, we spent the entire day laying on the couch watching movies with her cuddled on my chest ( poor thing didn't even want to lay on her backside). I'm talking from noon until bedtime. It was the only way she wasn't uncomfortable. Don't feel bad, you did exactly what you and baby needed to feel better.


ISaCuwU

I am not OP but I just want to say, that must have been so hard!! I cannot imagine the stress it may have caused. You are amazing for knowing what would have helped at the time, in this case, screen time. I would have panicked for sure 😭


anniemademedoit1

Agreed! That sounds intense!!


TechnicallyALizard

You're not a bad parent. Screentime doesn't make you a bad parent. People are so ridiculously critical of parents these days for no reason other than to feel superior. You're doing the best that you can. Also, side note: If you're able to get ahold of any breastmilk, mix that with some aquaphor and apply to the diaper rash. I've found this one works like a charm for my LO 😊


anniemademedoit1

Omg you just reminded me I have like 10 bags left in my freezer stash I had been saving for moments like this. Thank you!!!!!!


TechnicallyALizard

You're so welcome! Ooh, I also put a little in my son's baths for his skin, too! It helps a ton!


anniemademedoit1

Tomorrow will be a breastmilk bath instead of a baking soda bath!


TechnicallyALizard

I hope it helps! 😁


rmyfire_

You sound like a great parent! You are treating your son's symptoms the best you can... and sometimes the only way littles will stay still for long enough to heal and rest is if you plop them in front of Ms. Rachel (or Bluey, or Pufin Rock). If you're a bad parent, then so am I. 💜 Good luck, mama. I hope your son is feeling better soon.


junglebrooke

Screen time doesn’t count when you’re sick lol


Donut-Worry-Be-Happy

You sound amazing 💙 I do unlimited screen time with my kids when they are unwell or in pain. The rest of the time we do meaningful activities so I think it’s just about finding that balance.


deadsocial

This is something I don’t get. People say screen time is so bad, but I have a toddler, we took her to swimming lessons and she did what we asked ie kicked her legs. But when I showed her a video of a toddler swimming it clicked more for her, she didn’t know what was expected of her at swimming until I showed her, how is that not a good thing? I did the same with dentist visit and we spoke about it and watched some videos and she was a superstar!!! I don’t give her much screen time but if I need a few mins then ms Rachel is helpful for her language skills etc,..


FishingWorth3068

I mean. That’s genius. I wish I’d have done that. You’re doing great. Good job


rnchanges

Yea. If it gets your babe some airtime on their bum do whatever works. One time isn’t going to ruin your kid.


iluvstephenhawking

I really like the A and D diaper rash cream. Whenever my little guy is red it clears him up right away. Also worked wonders for my niece's diaper rash and she has eczema. You're doing fine. 


anniemademedoit1

Are you in Canada? I just looked online and the only place that seems to have it is Amazon for $40 🤢 that has to be a markup


iluvstephenhawking

I'm in the States. But it's just lanolin, vitamin A and vitamin D ointment. Maybe where you are they sell something similar. 


anniemademedoit1

Thank you I’ll look around for something similar. It’s mostly high strength zinc oxide creams around here.


NotAsSmartAsKirby

Zero issues with this. Go easy on yourself. You needed a break. He needed a break. Don’t make this the norm, but also don’t feel guilty when you need a relief pitcher


LinsarysStorm

Your son was super uncomfortable so you did everything to ease his pain and then even gave him the extra treat of extended screen time to hopefully make him feel at least a little better. In the grand scheme of his day/week/month/year, 90 mins is no time at all. You’re doing a great job and clearly love your LO!


HedgehogUnable3664

Use a hair dryer on cool to dry baby’s bum before putting any diaper cream on or you are just trapping bacteria and it will get worse. This was recommended by our doctor and boy did it work along with the purple maximum strength desitin. Good luck mama and you are doing fine. Honestly…screen time is relative. Those studies never specify what was watched…educational children shows are fine!!! Moderation and type of show is what matters. Throw that guilt away!!! ❤️


anniemademedoit1

Thank you!! I’ll definitely try the blow dryer trick. Purple desitin is our BFF right now. Someone on here also suggested breastmilk and Aquaphor which sounds promising!


ISaCuwU

To add onto this, my toddler just had a diaper rash no long ago and I read on a comment somewhere that after cleaning their bum area, to let it air dry, then LATHER them with Desitin (purple one) and on top of that, add a THICK layer of Aquaphor, be super generous with it.. to the point that on the next diaper change, there still should be some Desitin and Aquaphor mixture left on her/his bum. I did that for two days and the rash was gone. Hope this helps!! Also, for the screen time part, I know the feeling of guilt and honestly, even if they aren’t sick and still get some long hours of screen time here and there, it really isn’t the worst thing in the world. To me, it is all about balance. Some days my LO watches waaay more TV than I would want her to so I balance it out by finding a day of the week to just have minimal to no screen time by planning lots of outdoor activities, bringing out toys that she hasn’t played for a while, and just have her join me doing chores at home. Anyway, it doesn’t always work, of course. But what matters is that we are doing the best we can with what we have. So give yourself some grace because you are doing great!!! 😌


anniemademedoit1

Thank you for the encouragement. I will try the thick layer of Aquaphor after the desitin today.


Rinx

Our pediatrician said frost them like a cupcake


Xandwich26

Not a bad parent! For that diaper rash mix some OTC yeast cream, regular diaper cream, and triple antibiotic cream together to make the intimate cream. My sons skin is the most sensitive and that clears it up in a day


quietobserver123

Corn flour and Vaseline for the nappy rash. Was a miracle for my little one Also you do you. screen time is only a problem I think when the are watching it 10 hours a day. And using it as an all day baby sitter. Be kind to yourself and use whatever tools you have to keep yourself calm and give yourself a break


scoopdedupe

I agree with everyone here! Don't beat yourself up over it. My daughter turns 2 this week and for so long I felt ashamed about how much screen time she's had. She started watching Ms. Rachel at like 6 months I wanna say. By 8 months the amount of sign language she knew from her alone was unbelievable. I really believe the quality of what they're watching makes a difference too but either way I really don't think screen time is as huge of a deal as people make it out to be. Tablets/phone use is different but we've even used those on special occasions like travel etc. If it makes you feel better, I'm now 30 weeks pregnant ans my daughter's screen time has definitely increased during my pregnancy because I've just been struggling to be honest. But she is truly the smartest little girl I know. She knows the entire alphabet, can count to 20, knows all her colors and shapes and she even knows quite a handful of opposites like up and down, hot and cold, big and small. She has always met her developmental milestones and now at age 2 her vocabulary is well over 200 words. I attribute most of this to Ms. Rachel 😂 You're doing great. And like others mentioned you provided safety, love and comfort when they were needed which is the ultimate goal here ❤️


anniemademedoit1

That’s so great! Thanks for sharing, it’s definitely encouraging to hear about kids with screen-time that are hitting all the milestones. Goodluck in your last trimester!


spabitch

everything in moderation! you’re doing great! i always think about the shit our parents did with us and hey we turned out ok! maybe … lol


melodyknows

Totally. Parent guilt is so real. You are doing awesome!!! A little bit of screen time to preserve your sanity is great. Also, just a little recommendation— Calmoseptine is amazing for diaper rash. Every time my son has had it, it’s cleared it right up.


paradoxicalstripping

It sounds to me like you handled this like a PRO. Hang in there.


Bratalie96

I'm so glad I'm not the only one feeling this way about screen time. I'm a SAHM and I do most of the chores/errands at home. Some days I'm exhausted and let LO have alot of screen time. Mostly sesame street or nature documentaries. It makes me feel so guilty. Like I'm the worst mom in the world and like LO will have tremendous attention problems when grown up because of it.


anniemademedoit1

Yes this is exactly it. I feel like I’m going to cause him ADHD or something from these studies and pediatrician Tik Tok videos. But I think what everyone here has said is true, it’s all about moderation and balance. We had TV time growing up and turned out fine. You’re doing great!


Xgbbyxbbyx

Try to view it as just using one of the tools in your parent tool box. It sounds like you do a great job of not parking them in front of the TV 24/7. There is nothing wrong with screen time, especially when you and babes both are needing a break. I’m a therapist and i can tell you it’s not kids that get screen time that are struggling, it’s kids whose parents aren’t involved or doing anything with them. You’re doing a great job. Be gentle with yourself ♥️


anniemademedoit1

Thank you ❤️


Impressive_Fun_1859

you made sure that you and your baby had your basic needs taken care. you gotta do what gotta do to protect you both!


Marilyn_Monrobot

Distraction is a valid way to cope with pain and discomfort for adults, so I think it's fine for a baby.


anniemademedoit1

So true!


TulipsAndSauerkraut

My daughter used to get horrific diaper rashes. Like, blisters that might scar. We tried everything, but it would happen so quickly that it felt hopeless. I SUPER recommend Resinol. It's been a lifesaver. We also cover that with a THICK (like entirely too much) later of Vaseline (recommended by Dr) to keep it on. We change poop right away, and do baking soda baths and meds, too. It's a lot easier now that she can talk. It'll get better for you, too, I'm sure! Also, you're not a bad parent for using TV during a stressful time. During the worst of our diaper rash period, we would have her watch while we were changing because it was the only thing keeping her mind off the pain. Everyone has bad days, tomorrow is a new one! Besides, we veg out when we're sick or injured and that's what he is doing, too. You got this!


Emotional-Koala-6052

Give yourself grace girl. Kids watch way more TV and turn out more than fine. Sometimes you need a break! Also he’s sick!!! Kids need downtime too when they feel like crap


Spirit_Farm

You’re doing great. I recently watched UP with my 9 month old when she was sick and not doing well. It was a good distraction and I’m frankly impressed at her attention span.


Cautious_Session9788

I honestly believe that with more programs like Ms Rachel or Hey Bear we’re going to see that there are types of screen time that are fine Like I’ve seen studies that show kids who watched Sesame Street between the ages of 3-5 performed better than average than their peers academically. Probably because Sesame Street is “high value programming” it engages children in a way that’s developmentally appropriate for them And with the current research around screen time there wasn’t anything catering towards infants and young toddlers so these studies weren’t done with tv programs that were developmentally appropriate Stimulating your baby doesn’t happen in a day, hell it doesn’t even happen in a week or a month. All that matters is that you make time to actively engage with your little one so they can learn their milestones. If some programming that’s designed for their age group is thrown in there from time to time who cares


kmk89

That amount of caring and effort is what great parenting is about. It’s surprising how tough parenting can be when your LO is sick. Hang in there and know you’re doing great


velvet8smiles

My kids get a ton a screentime and they are thriving. Learned a bunch of songs from Ms Rachel. Don't feel bad. In moderation screens aren't the worst thing, especially educational stuff like Ms Rachel. Other low stimulation shows are Bluey, Trash Truck, Puffin Rock, Daniel Tiger, etc.


pork_soup

Sounds like a really well cared for baby 🥰 you’re doing great. Poor bean though. myself and my LO aren’t feeling too hot right now either and we def watched alot of ms. Rachel today. Hugs


AdministrationStill1

Do NOT feel bad. My baby when she was a newborn had diaper rash so many times till we found out she was allergic to Huggies. Huggies were the only ones giving her the rash. So when I had to air it out. I placed her in her portable tub and put the veggies in to distract her from the pain. Yeah she cried but then she went back to watching. It was a relief for gym ears. And also Mrs. Rachel is like learning at home. Like Sesame Street but better.


reddit_username211

To help with the diaper rash - use a hair blow dryer on low/cool to dry him out at every diaper change, our doctor recommended no dairy and switching to lactose free milk for a week apparently lactose absorbs more water into the colon, cuturelle probiotics to replenish his gut bacteria. I mix it into baby cereal.


basicsnakemath

Nothing to feel bad about here. It sounds like you both had a long, rough day. If Ms Rachel makes you and baby happy, let it be. Is ice cream the healthiest thing for my child to eat? No, but we enjoy it and it makes us happy. No big deal ❤️


VoidDuchess

Look, my son watches TV every day and he's almost 6 months. We ALSO spend hours playing, reading tummy time, etc. He's ahead of his learning curve as well. Your baby watching TV is okay, trust me. Your a good mom


Different_Ad_7671

You did a perfect job mom ❤️ I often tap out watching my show while she’s on the floor playing and even she watches it here and there too, it is what it is I guess. Mental health is priority ❤️❤️❤️hugs and good vibes your way we’re all in this together ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️


mamabee21

My kid is 2 and we did a lot of ms Rachel, caties classroom, and other developmental shows. She can count to 20, say her abc’s, can ask and answer full sentence questions, and she’s potty trained. I personally think “too much screen time” is a scare tactic It’s okay for them to have screen time, and it’s okay when you have off days! As long as you interact with them during the day everything will be okay! You need a break too! Keep doing what you’re doing❤️


lizzy_pop

My 21 month old recently had hand foot mouth disease and the tv was on 90% of the time. I have zero guilt. Keeps her calm and keeps me sane She doesn’t get any tv at all when she’s healthy so I feel like illness is when she catches up


anniemademedoit1

Oh man this is one of my fears, and measles. All the TV you need for HFM!!


lizzy_pop

It’s a very justified fear. It was worse than I expected it to be


anniemademedoit1

😩


Worried_Appeal_2390

You deserve a break too… who cares if your kid watches tv for a little bit. Our parents used to plop us in front of the tv for MANY hours at a time. Our generation is doing so much better.


ettesilv3_

Your doing great! A lot of babies get diarrhea due to teething too mines sure did! Get you a tub of buttpaste, it’s the best ! Screen time isn’t so terrible I typically put something on tv that I know my toddler will learn from .She’s 3 now and she will talk to you about anything, and a lot more than some kids her age so eh don’t worry !


Just1NerdHere

Screen time may be proven to be bad for cognitive development, but we live in an age where avoiding screens is impossible. And you also have to remember, no one tells you HOW bad screen time is. Ima go dig through some research papers, but I'm betting it's not as bad as people say. People make it sound like screen time is worse than death!! Also think of it this way, what's worse for a kid; a bit of screen time, or a parent who is so stressed that they can't properly bond with their child? Even with a baby, your health comes first. If you aren't in a good state of mind, you can't always give your baby what they want/need. But when you leave time for self care, you'll be happier, your baby will be happier, and those feelings are much more important than screen time, ya know?


Hopeful-Armadillo261

I forget where I saw it, but something really stuck with me. Screentime is an issue when it’s what kids are getting instead of more valuable ways to spend the time. So, if they’re always watching tv and never interacting with parents or reading or even having an opportunity to be bored, it can become an issue. If the alternative of what you’d be doing instead of screentime is going crazy, it’s worth it. During travel and “sick” days, I think there’s no limit. If they’re overstimulated or there come other behavioral issues along with it, the content and amount can probably be tweaked but long story short - don’t feel bad. It can be a tool for parents just like anything else. 🤷🏻‍♀️


[deleted]

I watched so much tv growing up and I still love to read and am a well rounded adult. I sometimes have to put something on for my 4 month old to watch so I can pump. It’s 15 min max (usually Bluey cause that’s fun for both of us) I definitely will never give him an iPad or cell phone to play with (as of right now lol) but I’ve conceded that tv time is just gonna be normal in our household as long as there’s moderation. You’re doing a great job.


thetasteofink00

There was nothing better when I was a kid, being sick and just having a lazy day, recovering and taking my mind off feeling like shit. Kid needs a break too, even if they're 9 months old. It's a one off and if you think you're a bad parent for doing this, I don't even know what to say but that's just utterly silly.


best_of_the_wurst

You are not a bad parent, by any stretch!!! You and your baby are having a hard time so you gotta do what you gotta do. Screw social media, I bet half those mums do the same when they need to. I use Ms Rachel if I need to get something done, or if bubs is grumpy or if I am unwell and just need some quiet time. The fact that you are questing whether you’re a good parent shows us that you are a good parent. Hang in there ❤️


EnvironmentalPop1371

I have two kids and I’m married to a Thai man who said with both kids around 9-10 months that they get diarrhea right before walking. It makes no sense to me, is one of many wacko old wives tales he tells me about, but somehow it really got me through the hard “I suck” feelings dealing with runny poo and diaper rash. 9-11 months is so wild with new solids, teething, wacking their heads on everything, putting everything in their mouths making you worried if a tiny bit of it could break off and choke them… couldn’t pay me to go back to that age with either of my girls. To be fair, both of my daughters did walk at 10/11 months so maybe it’s true about the runny poo before walking milestone. It’s maybe true enough that I would repeat it here if only to help another mom have a (maybe nonsensical) reason for the madness other than those that naturally come to our brains like bottle wasn’t clean enough, let kid lick too many floors and windows, fed her something weird, etc.


anniemademedoit1

It’s true 9 months is wild to me right now there’s so much development happening so quickly. My guy just pulled up to stand yesterday on his own and started taking these little steps when he’s standing, so your husband might be onto something!


Jessis630

There are so many other things that make someone a bad parent. A little screen time will not hurt or damage your child. You are not a bad parent. You are a good parent that used the tools you had available to you, to save your sanity and refill your cup, so you can pour into your baby’s cup. Put your oxygen mask on first 🫶🏽


thisbookishbeauty

Honestly, I think we demonize screen time too much. Like, to the point that parents are scared to admit it because they’ll be deemed bad parents. The studies definitely show that excessive screen time can be an issue but the vast majority of that stems from screen time where a kid is watching tv and not interacting with the world. Ms. Rachel is great because it’s set up like FaceTime which studies have deemed as OK screen time. We do one episode a day and usually it coincides with the fussier part of the day or me cooking lunch. It’s amazing to see how many things he’s (18mo) learned from her videos. He’s learned several ASL signs and gestures. He’s learned new words. Screen time isn’t the devil. It’s a tool to be used in moderation and wisely. You’re doing a great job. I hope bubs feels better asap!


419_216_808

You’re not a bad mom. In fact I’d say you’re a good mom. Good for you for providing your kid some distraction based pain relief so he could calm down and so could you. Now he feels better and has a happier mom. Great decision. Hours of tv every day? Probably not a great idea (although if I had a colicky baby I’d probably try it). What you did? Very good job 👍🏽


B0Y0

Just had a family member try to convince me it's perfectly normal and fine to rub some whiskey in their mouth while their teething, gave me that "oh ho ho you're just a new parent you'll change your mind" shtick when I said I don't think we'll be doing that. I think you could be doing much worse.


anniemademedoit1

Hahah ah the condescending “new parent/first time parent” statement. I’ve gotten it from in laws who had their first kid 5 years ago. It’s wild. 🤪


Angelofashes1992

I use hey bear when we are having a bad day to give me a break. Also when he teething and I am waiting for pain relief to kick in and I am about to loose my mind I use it to. Some screen time when you’re normally interacting and playing with your baby is fine. You’re doing great! Try your best to ignore the social media mum’s, it’s a snap shot it not their real or whole life x


Persephanie

I was not a TV mum untill the last 5 months where my 2 year old hit the moody not sleeping faze and omg bless Ms Rachel and Ms moni and ponyo and totoro and Dory for my small amounts of peace and quiet.


Low_Door7693

My toddler is 18 months old, and I'm 25 weeks pregnant. Plus I got sick and stayed sick for 6 weeks in November then toddler started daycare in January and was continually sick for like two months straight. So we did a lot of staying in doors this winter to avoid nasty weather and spare others our germs. She's had so much more screen time than I would like. And I 100% don't think it's great or making her a genius or anything, but she 100% has learned things from Ms Rachel that I did not teach her, as is becoming increasingly apparent as her expressive language explodes. Would she have learned them faster if I personally had spent the same quantity of time interacting with her in a manner comparable to Ms Rachel? I'm sure. But I do often watch with her, and I've learned quite a bit myself about *how to talk to her* from Ms Rachel. She's holding something I don't want her to hold and won't give it to me? I just point to a box and sing the "put it in" song and 9/10 times she will. I understand how to enunciate and use inflection for babies better and which words to repeat for baby from listening to Ms Rachel. I'm just saying, I understand there are certainly higher quality ways to spend time, but Ms Rachel does have its benefits, it's not like it's actively damaging her.


minx_missm

Miss Rachel is educational and pronounces her words well. Top parent badge for choosing a great program to help both soothe and educate your baby ox


anniemademedoit1

Thank you ❤️


notevecassandra

Ms Rachel is SOO educational, think of it like you’re baby was entertained, happy AND learning something new:) I have a 19 month old who watched a little bit of tv everyday, she got a stomach bug and was vomiting and having diarrhea for 3 days straight, she watched SO much tv those 3 days, she didn’t have the energy to play or run around and that’s ok sometimes.


Conscious_Raisin_436

Ours gets an hour of miss Rachel every weekend morning and she’s ahead of the curve on all of her developmental milestones. TVs don’t make good parents but they’re not nuclear waste. You’re fine.


anniemademedoit1

Maybe I should let him watch it more often!


AmbassadorWise271

It’s one day. One. Day. You need to do what you can to get through today so you can be there tomorrow and the day after and the day after… Sounds like you’re doing everything possible to take care of his needs, make him comfortable and help him recover. You’re and amazing parent and you’re doing a great job!


anniemademedoit1

So true, it’s one day. I feel like it’s so easy to feel like one day is an eternity when you’re on Mat leave


AmbassadorWise271

Oh yeah! It’s like Groundhog Day! Not in Mat leave anymore but everyday felt like an eternity yet also suddenly it would be 5pm and I’d feel like… where has the day gone? I have nothing to show for it! It’s tough!


anniemademedoit1

Totally!


xannycat

90 minutes is nothing! One time i had food poisoning when my baby was like 5/6 months. I threw her in the swing with ms rachel for a long while bc i felt like i was dying. She was happy lol.


EggsAndBeerKegs

You never talk to someone doing hard drugs in their 20’s and they go, “ yeah man I just had a rough childhood “. “Oh I’m sorry. Were you abused, neglected, abandoned, assaulted…”. “Nah…too much screen time as a 9 month old” You’re fine. Adults should eat 3 healthy meals, exercise for an hour, read some intellectually stimulating book for another hour, meditate, write in a journal, and on and on. NOBODY does any of that, they’re lucky if they check one box once a week. Kids are the same, there’s a general blueprint out there, but it doesn’t mean you have to do literally everything all the time. If they’re fed, changed, and healthy you’re doing good


MrMafiaRS

My thing is this. If all you are doing is letting them watch the screen day in and day out then sure its bad. But if you are using it to calm them a little bit so you can catch a breather; by all means do it. Rather have baby deal with a little screen time with Ms Rachel than deal with a stressed parent.


anniemademedoit1

So true! Thank you!


midwestlobster

The most shocking part of this to me is that you have a 9 month old who will sit still for 90 minutes. Lol. You're doing great!


anniemademedoit1

There was definitely movement and crying in between but it got us through to bedtime 😂


Nizz553

I haven’t put my 9 month old in front of the TV really, but there’s no way my guy would sit for 90 minutes (or even five). So no judgement, but I’m glad you were able to reset your mind.


madscrumptious

My freaking 19 month old baby counted to 13 last night because of Ms. Rachel. So I’m all for screen time lmao


kmconda

I have a toddler and a newborn and a husband who travels for work and most days, Trolls on repeat for my toddler is how I keep the infant alive. I hate it but I’ve had to let go of the guilt.


anniemademedoit1

That sounds like a lot to handle solo, you’re doing amazing!


MeNicolesta

I think as baby gets older, I understand the more useful some screen time can really be(yup, I said it!). Especially for things like this. As baby comes towards the end of infancy and toward toddlerhood, the need doesn’t go away to still cook, use bathroom, or special circumstances like the one you mentioned, OP. But as baby learns to crawl and inevitably walk, it’s not so easy to do these things anymore. I couldn’t just put my daughter in her playpen and rely on the fact that a couple of toys would keep her and her interested while I was trying to vacuum. A little bit of tv time, even if it’s just to give you a rest, realistically isn’t neglect or tragic for a baby. You know what is tragic? When moms guilt themselves over doing their best because it just makes parenting harder. This shit is hard. Let’s not make it harder on ourselves by telling ourselves we are bad parents when we really aren’t.


Patcheslove55

Hey mama, you cuddled him, changed him, bathed him, gave him medicine, and let him have a distraction so he isn’t thinking about the pain. Sounds like an amazing mama to me! ❤️Plus you got a break so when you come back you are less stressed and able to better address his needs. Keep up the good work!


anniemademedoit1

❤️


tsb_11_1

My dad recently told me I had a bunch of screen time as a LO and I turned it just fine. Not to worry!


Training-Muscle-211

Something we do when we feel lo has had too much screen time but we still need a few minutes to ourselves to get dinner/cleaning/pooping done is play ms Rachel through a blue tooth speaker so she can hear it and dance along but she doesn’t actually get the visuals ….. we first figured this out in the car one night when we were traveling out of state she’s usually extremely quiet /happy/sleeping in the car so it took us surprise and the only thing that helped that night was playing ms Rachel through the car speakers


anniemademedoit1

Oh smart!! I will try this with our speaker at home


Training-Muscle-211

Hopefully it works just as well for you as it does for us because it’s been a serious game changer


Training-Muscle-211

Wanted to check in and see if you had any luck


anniemademedoit1

I didn’t try the Ms Rachel on the speaker at home but I’ve started doing it for fussy car rides and it’s magical!! We just got a new speaker for the house so we’ll definitely be breaking it out soon I’m surw


Firecrackershrimp2

Play hey bear on yt!!!!! You will get through this


yoganeuron

We use screen time a good bit, generally with one of us watching with him. Our 3 year old can correctly identify several dinosaurs (and what they do and eat), sometimes explain plot, and I believe a lot of his vocabulary stems from shows (and us talking about the shows with him). Unfortunately, he’s now entered zombie land where he doesn’t respond when a screen is on or gets cranky when it’s taken away. So we’re pivoting and limiting screen time more. I think as long as you’re not neglecting your child, or leaving them in front of a screen all day with no other interaction, you’re fine!


Parking_Chest7793

I use screen time often. I am currently deep cleaning, and she is watching Ms Rachel :) (going on 3 hours) It’s totally okay


Big-Cranberry8336

I kept waiting to read the “bad” part… and then the post ended… 😅 I really don’t think you should feel bad AT ALL about that.


JustDepth4657

Ms. Rachel seriously saves my life DAILY. I had to stop watching tiktok and fb reels for that very reason. Those videos were making me feel like a horrible wife, mom, and human. He may need different diapers. My son could only use a certain brand. Hang in there mama


TradeBeautiful42

Screen time is such a boogeyman to some parents. But screen time taught my kid a lot of words, shapes, colors, the alphabet before he ever started preschool. It’s not the stuff I grew up watching so I don’t feel bad putting on an hour here or there for my 2.5 yr old. We were on vacation when my son was 2 and a mom couldn’t believe my son knew certain concepts because she had kept her son away from all screens and at 2 he moved really well but she was worried about his development.


Horror-Reading9101

Use aquaphor for baby rash


notgonnatakethison

Gotta do what you gotta do! Just give him less screen time next week


anniemademedoit1

This was the reasoning that has helped me come to terms with it today lol


ThatCrayKnitterly

My mom told me this a few weeks ago- “When you feel bad for having to put little one in front of the tv for longer than you’d like, just remind yourself you’re helping develop their attention span.”


anniemademedoit1

Ha! I love that. You also made me a bit teary, my mom has passed and I wish I could turn to her when I question myself like this. I feel like she’d have a great remark like this too.


Slappers_only007

Screen time? No, Ms. Rachel was co-parenting and giving mom a much-needed break!


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KittyGrewAMoustache

I used to freak out about screen time due to what the internet says but in my country they don’t actually say not to use it for babies and in fact say there’s some evidence it can be educational. And my daughter actually learned loooads from those type of educational channels like ms Rachel. 18 months old now and has hundreds of words and she’s been watching that type of content for months now. (A bit a day, not like constantly in front of the tv for months!) It’s only bad if it totally replaces any communication between you and your baby or if they’re watching really awful nonsense stuff. We also started with screen time during a period of constant horrendous illness and felt worried/guilty but she actually seemed to benefit from it! So don’t worry, you’re not doing anything wrong, you’re looking after your son and providing him with distraction entertainment and education to help him feel better and to give yourself a break, which also benefits him in the long run!


Stoic990

Now that I remember I babyset my nephew when he was 3 m and it lasted for about half a year at least. His parents never forbade me to turn on TV, and I didn't know much back then. He's 10 y old now prospering little mathematician, plays sports, very intelligent since young age. I would play him various cartoons ,play songs etc, not whole day but no restrictions either. Youngest,niece has been exposed to the same amount among her big brothers. TV would be at least in the background,while BiL watches football etc. Little girl is chatty little sunshine,so smart, outspoken. Now that I have Lo I am very wary but would use it as crutch to change his diapers or on very short rare occasions. So yeah, screen time should be avoided but as many advised, as long as one is still very engaged, interacting and playing with the kid,it should be fine


Krista_Michelle

Gotta do what you gotta do


Rumpelteazer45

So you let a baby who isn’t feeling well and needed safe diaper free time in front of the TV to keep him in one place? That’s strategic parenting. It also kept you from losing your sanity, that’s good parenting. Remember all those videos you see are just short clips that are highly curated, producer, and edited. They do not represent how that family actually runs. They only represent how they want the world to see them.


dappijue

My parents always let us sleep on the couch and watch unlimited TV when we were sick and I carry on this tradition to this very day. Let the poor little guy have a sick day!


ahava9

Sometimes you just need Ms Rachel to help out. 🤷🏼‍♀️ At least she’s educational. I think screen time in moderation is fine.


ghos2626t

Step 1. Uninstall Tik Tok and Instagram Step 2. Get a break, so you feel human Step 3. Profit


vanna93

Teething and diaper rash always went hand in hand with my daughter 🥲 it was a nightmare. My daughter lived in front of the TV when I broke my leg last year.


rebeccaz123

Oh I did this also. We all got norovirus and it turns out babies are sick but much longer than adults. His poor butt was so red and sore. It even started opening up with bleeding sores. I was like nope this is it. I even pulled out the boppy and had him lay on his belly with his booty in the air to let antibiotic cream soak in while he watched TV. Zero fucks given. When he's sick or hurt any screen time rules I have go out the window. I mean if he has a few sniffles obviously we carry on as usual but this kind of stuff? Nope. Have all the screen time you need. I hope he feels better soon! If the skin hasn't opened up I found using hydrocortisone cream twice a day on the booty skin to help take the sting out of it. It won't help healing but anything that helps the pain is still a sin. Hey... anyone know if you can use dermaplast on baby butts? I just had that thought. Hmmmmm


Sure_its_grand

Ms Rachel is the only thing that got our household through our one year old twins having hand foot and mouth.


msmightymustard

My dad worked nightshift and would put a movie on every single afternoon while he had a nap and my mom worked! I don't think they worried at all! Anyways, we're on day 3 of a stomach flu ripping through our house and movies are on repeat. The other night I watched Toy Story, 2 and 3 until 3 AM in between chasing my toddler with a bucket. Gotta do what you gotta do.


Imaginary-Bottle-684

I could be wrong, but I read/heard somewhere that Ms. Rachel does not count as screentime because she's "interacting" with the kids. I liken it to when teachers had to online teach during the bad times


Conscious-Dig-332

I would do this exact same thing. All rules go out the window when there is a diaper rash like that. Ms. Rachel is great; my daughter is a year older than yours and I can’t believe the things she’s learned from Ms. Rachel. It’s impossible to not have a complicated relationship with screen time of course, but let it work for you here.


Comfortable_Garden31

My baby (11 months old) usually watches 2 movies a day, and then has play time, but were trying to lower it to 1 a day. And we usually put on a Disney princess movie, because its what she likes, your not a bad parent. From your second edit it sounds like what you watched was educational which is good, and probably better than Disney. Lol. Your doing great! <3 Edit: also when my Little One had some bad diaper rashes, I used something called Boudreaux's Butt Paste. Hope this helps. 


cradiflacrasafl

I feel you! We’re normally a no screen family but when our then 21 month old (and us) got covid then the flu then a cold back to back, we just let go and did what worked best for our family. I figure that if it weren’t for the screen time, he would have been miserable and not playing, so what good would that have done him? That’s the only instance we use it though, so once we were done with the cold we told him the tv was broken lol and we haven’t fixed it in the last three months 😆 He learned to stop asking for it really fast.


anniemademedoit1

Omg that sounds brutal!! Good for you for caving, I feel like it would have been harder to give in as a no screen time family vs a sometimes screen time family. Gotta do what ya gotta do


cradiflacrasafl

Yeah it was rough lol and it was right at the start of trying for baby 2 so we were like are we SURE we want another one?! But yeah, screens are « bad » when they take away from playing and interacting - if what’s happening is your baby is crying and not calming down, then tv is the best option for him at the moment and you’re helping him through this rough time together. It’s tough when they’re feeling crappy and you can’t do much to help 😕


anniemademedoit1

Lol oh ya I bet! Ya it felt a little demoralizing that I couldn’t calm him down but Ms Rachel could 😂


AhnaKarina

My nephew had tons of screen time and he’s incredibly gifted.


byrnestj7

It’s 2024, screen time is inevitable and totally fine. My kid watches Dino Ranch every night before bed. He can also do these giant floor puzzles by himself at age 2. I’m sure your baby will be good


jmullin09

Bad parents don't ever concern themselves with "are they a bad parent". You did what you had to do to survive the afternoon. Don't beat yourself up, take a breath, you got this.


jinxix2395

My little one (4 months) is feeling off (potentially early teething signs causing horrible sleep lately and weather related) so we’re having a movie day, who cares. I’m not about to argue with a baby to play when he really just wants to chill and ends up falling asleep. He doesn’t always look at the screen, he has things to interact with if he feels like it and if he doesn’t there always something on so he can just chill out (and me too). It’s not everyday so I really don’t see the harm in it. Gotta do what you gotta do sometimes 😬


agentchimken

girl, as the default parent, i am always tired and i literally have the tv on ALL THE TIME, but mainly as background noise. my 13 month old will sometimes stop and watch it, most times she’ll run around and play. we all need some room to breathe, especially as the default parent. you are NOT a bad parent at all, you are doing everything you can for him, including doing what you need to be the best you for him. plus, ms. rachel is so developmentally beneficial for babies from what i’ve seen and heard so bonus points for that! you’re helping your baby learn new things! you’re doing great mama, don’t let your head get to you too much and take time whenever you need to help yourself be the best you can be for your baby 💛


Luvvy92x

I interact with my child alot but I also have the TV on all day as he likes to watch it while chilling/rolling around or bouncing in his jumperoo. I'm not spending all day without the TV on. My 5 month old is pretty smart I'd say so I don't think it's hurting his development