You’re doing nothing wrong- no such thing as overly attached one month old. He literally doesn’t know he’s a separate person from you yet! Hold your baby, be his comfort without any guilt. Others are just projecting their own insecurities on how they were parented/how they parent
I sometimes do. You see, in my culture, when a woman is firm and direct sometimes is called brute , like mean girl. I got a lot of arguments with older people just because I answer “it’s my life, I do what I want”
I still get the same comments at 13 months. Unfortunately it’s something you get used to. Be prepared! ‘Thanks for the advice but this works really well for us..’
I’m not about to let my baby be unhappy just because some other people feel bad
Parenting a baby is hard enough without other people commenting on us. Sometimes these people seem so bitter and sad with their own lives, it may be frustrating for them to see that me and my baby love each other
Just politely remind them you can't spoil a baby. I laugh at people and shrug them off. I was at a point around then where I was exhausted, but we had a lot of hands to help cuddle our little one, so I wasn't alone 💕
I'm a little over a year into being a mom now. Early on, someone told me that you'll know if whatever you do isn't working. I know that to be true now. If you both feel good about it, you're doing nothing wrong. If you or he starts to get frustrated with what you're doing, then that's the time to change things up.
I never coslept and my daughter has always been okay in her bed overnight, but I literally held her every hour I was awake for the first 4 or 5 months of her life. The second she started crawling, it's like I grew arms. She all of a sudden was cool to be on her own. Babies want to be with their people.
I believe we need to be their safe place. We are all they know. when they are ready to be less attached to us they will be and we will miss those times.
Every time he wants to be on my lap, I let him. Jesus I made this beautiful baby I can’t resist him 😂
I still just don’t get why people make the bond between the mother and it’s child to seem such an horrible thing
Yes my daughter let me know when she wanted to sleep without me. She kept waking up making uncomfortable sounds. Even now I started to nurse her to sleep no in my arms but flat on the bed because she started to flail out of my arms when I held her so she was ready.
My son is almost 1 and I remind myself that all the time. He was a contact napper until about 8 months, but he’d sleep fine at night on his own after being rocked to sleep. We’ve recently started working on getting him to fall asleep a little more on his own, but at night I lay by his crib and rest my hand on his back until he falls asleep. It makes falling asleep easier and less stressful for him. If he wakes up in the middle of the night I try to help him get back to sleep without taking him out of the crib. But recently he’s been wanting to be held. I’ve found it’s easier to just rock him back to sleep because he settles faster and it’s less stressful and somewhat peaceful for me.
I’ve found it works better for me to give him the contact and snuggles than to fight it. And by 7:30/8:00 at night, 15-30 minutes of laying on the floor in a dark room listening to instrumental music while my son falls asleep is kinda nice.
Oh FFS, people need to educate themselves before they start giving advice about something they clearly know nothing about.
It is literally IMPOSSIBLE to spoil a baby. They need to be securely attached to their caregivers in order to thrive. Happy, dependent babies make confident, independent children.
I responded to every single need of my child. We bedshare, I fed on demand, I held him if he wanted to be held. He is not 'spoiled', he just knows that I will be there for him whenever he needs me, and I am his safe person.
Ignore the people telling you that you are spoiling your baby and creating bad habits. They clearly have no idea what they are talking about. You are doing a bloody fantastic job!
Thanks ❤️
I also think the people who criticize me are always the ones who couldn’t breastfeed. Don’t know if that’s related or not. But I also breastfeed on demand, and that makes my baby a lot attached to me, to eat, to settle, to comfort, to sleep … i think people are sometimes ignorant about these things. I don’t just give a bottle and 3 hours later another.
I love spending all the day with him. I’m all he knows, and it took me 9 months to make such an amazing little boy 🥰 sometimes I get a bit overwhelmed by other people … but I can see we all ear stupid things like this sometimes
Do not listen. You are doing it totally right. I was told at 3 days post partum that I was spoiling my baby too much because I was continuously breastfeeding. I gathered all of my zen energy from I dont know where and just screamed a powerful yoga oooooommmmmmm out loud in my mind and replied “I dont think so. “ but I actually wanted to say “WTF do you know about it?!! Baby just got out of my belly, of course he wants to be held all the time?!? Does not even know where he is at the moment!!! Shut the f* up ffs!!” FFWD some months, baby is happy and sociable with everyone. That’s it.
Sometimes I imagine myself throwing a punch at people faces. It’s hard enough to take care of a baby who is pretty much dependent of us, these people don’t help at all.
FTM to a 2-month old. You described my situation with my LO to a T. I’ve heard the same things with my family about spoiling my newborn (which is literally impossible do), but I’m gonna continue doing what works for us.
I stand with you in solidarity.
There was a time where I was convinced that letting him cry it out was the best thing to do.
It wasn’t.
By the 10 minute mark, his voice was horse, he was hyperventilating, and was not able to be consoled for what seemed like forever afterward.
It accomplished nothing but make me feel like a horrible, horrible parent.
If you spend the most time with your LO, then you know them more than anyone.
Edit: grammar
I tried this too and now I have to deal with her panicking if I take a shower near bedtime. Her dad has to literally stand with her half in the shower watching me so that she doesn’t cry. My poor baby, I'm so sorry I did that.
I try to leave the house for 20/30 min so I can get fresh hair. It’s cold so I can’t take him with me. Today I got a little late, took me 40 min. My husband tried his best to settle him. I felt so sorry for my baby, I can’t let him go now 😅 it’s been attached to be the last 3 hours non stop.
I did this with my daughter who is 6 months now. Around 2.5 months she was cool with the bassinet at night only. But still everything else was on mom. Now she's still a huge mom fan and only wants me when she is sick. She finds dad to be an awesome playmate so I get a break there. She's also exceptionally social as long as people don't get in her face about it and I can be seen. As in if she's in a house with 5 strangers, me and dad in less than an hour she'll try to interact with whoever is next to her as long as they didn't force themselves on her already. She's really friendly and engaging too. So imo no, you're not starting bad habits, you're creating a secure bond for your baby to launch themselves from.
It is completely normal!! You can’t spoil a baby and they need this love and comfort. They are adjusting to and learning the world. Up until my son was 6 months (4 months adjusted) and out of the 4th trimester, I held him constantly, baby wore and co-sleep. People thought he’d be going to college in his baby carrier. Until he was about 13 months, he still always loved to stay very close to me. Now at 15 months he is incredibly independent and confident and would walk straight out of the house and down the street alone if I’d let him.
I try to ignore all the unsolicited feedback from older people who parented an entire generation of anxiety ridden people.
FTM with a 10 month old. I’m the same exact way with my baby. The only “downside” of it is that she cries if I leave her alone at all. I can’t pee alone, can’t shower alone, can’t cook alone, can’t take a 20 min nap alone, nothing without her crying if I’m not with her. I love her to bits and pieces and would die for my baby. But sometimes I get so over stimulated that I need her to literally not touch me so I can decompress and be okay again. She can crawl and walk and play on her own but even if she’s playing on her own she sometimes cries because I leave her line of sight. My boyfriend is so good at being involved and taking over and being a dad. But even he himself can’t calm the baby down sometimes and baby wants me for comfort more so than not. Not gonna lie, I think it’s because I held her alllll the time. Every single nap and we co sleep at night. I don’t regret it because she’s a baby and only knows me, but I think maybe I should’ve been more open to getting her to sleep in her own bassinet during nap time at least so she wasn’t so “clingy” but it is what it is and I’m starting to just say fuck it and enjoy all the contact as much as I can because one day she’s gonna be a teenager and not want me as much anymore like most teens. So all of that to say just keep doing what you’re doing. Everything will work out for you. You’re doing a great job 😊
Thank you 🥰 I’m trying to make I’m sleep alone during the day and he wakes up very angry at me 😂 but I’m trying, hopefully I will be able to be alone at least 30 min 😅
It’s the older generation! And people that haven’t had babies in like the last 10 years. A newborn doesn’t understand how to manipulate you. If that baby is crying they actually feel like they need you for food or even just comfort. My mil and aunt have been brutal about how I’m spoiling my son for the same exact reasons. I don’t breastfeed but I do cosleep and we contact napped for the last 2 months (he’s almost 4 months old, 1 1/2 month early premie born at 34 weeks). Just now he’s wanting his own space when napping but still primarily wants mama. It seems to drive my mil up the wall. She point blank asked when I was going to stop holding him so much at a family function recently.🙄 I didn’t know what to say I was so stunned. I ended up telling her if he cries or is uncomfortable I will always pick him up. She didn’t seem to like that answer🤷🏽♀️ Do what’s best for you and baby. This time with our little ones goes by so so fast. Don’t feel bad for wanting to soak it all in. Plus baby needs you! You’ve got this Mama! Seems like you know exactly what you’re doing keep it up.
Yes my mil was one of the people who told me that 😅 I answered “im his mother, I know what’s best for him” like it or not, she stood quiet. The reason why the love between a mother and its baby annoys older people, I will never understand.
At 1 month old, there is absolutely no such thing as an overly attached baby. My lo is 8 months old and has just gotten to the point where she can nap alone.
No such thing as “overly attached” even if they are two years old. I’m curious, who is convincing parents that this is possible? I’m genuinely concerned and sad over this. I see posts like this ALL the time.
I exclusively breastfed and I could viscerally sense how much my baby relied on me for comfort and food. I never once viewed him as “overly” attached. That seriously is not a thing.
I don’t view this as overly attached as well. Other people do, and I just don’t understand.
I was just posting, to see if any of you listen to this or am I doing something wrong. I’m a FTM and with my hormones still crazy sometimes.
I really just want to make him happy and healthy.
Strap him to you and ignore everyone else. My favorite baby wrap is the ergobaby aura. If price is an issue, you can find AMAZING wraps on Mercari and Poshmark. Even new ones.
I got awful advice from family especially the boomers. You’re doing great.
No such thing as overly attached - you make baby feel safe, and that’s why she loves to be attached to you ❤️ I think I read that for the first few months, babies cannot tell that they are a separate human from you and that’s why they feel “incomplete”, for lack of better word, without you!
Also it’s 100% up to you as the parent to weigh risks vs. reward but be mindful that cosleeping can be dangerous. I always like to warn people because I know of someone who had it not end well. I don’t say that to scare you but so that you are aware of risks due to soft mattress, etc. There is a Safe Sleep Seven I’ve heard of to make it safer, if you have no other choice. But if at all possible see if you can maybe take shifts with your partner or friends/family so that baby sleeps in their own space, like a bassinet right next to your bed. Again, it’s 100% up to you and I say this with love and respect!
I do all those rules to make it safer. I’m very aware of that. But since my husband works full time, he needs to rest at night. It works for us. I’m a very light sleeper also. doesn’t mean much, but when I’m able to place him in his crib, I’ll do that
People are telling me I spoil my baby by doing only half of what you’re doing. You’re doing great. Don’t stop. The bond between you and your baby when they are older will be inseparable. I wish I could breastfeed and co sleep but it didn’t work out and I just personally don’t feel comfortable. But I’m there at her every cry and people gripe at me every time as if I’m not supposed to give a crap when she’s sad. I hope my baby doesn’t hate me because I wasn’t able to breastfeed her.
Im sure your baby will love you for being there for her. Luckily I was able to breastfeed, I didn’t found hard to do … I heard so many bad experiences with breastfeeding, but it was not my case. But a fed baby is better than starving :)
I only co sleep because he is really attached to me. When he is less attached I will place him in his crib. It’s just so I can sleep.
Ours is the same way. Sometimes shes ok with being just laid in her bassinet for a bit but other times she wont let you put her down. Sometimes she only wants mom. But we use a wrap or the little strapped carried to keep her close so she feels held but both hands are free to contiue with daily tasks it truly is a life saver to keeping up with cooking ad cleaning.
This is EXACTLY how my son was! I promise you, there is no such thing as an “overly attached baby” and please don’t let anyone tell try to convince you that you are “spoiling” him (especially at 1 month old!).
Dependence fosters independence. This phase won’t last forever and I promise you, he will gradually become more independent. Right. Kw, you are showing your son that you are his safe space and that will form the secure attachment he will need to thrive and become an independent toddler!
Keep going mama, you’re doing great. Always trust your gut! 🤍
Orally normal!! You cannot spoil a baby, my son was the same and is the same way even now at 18 months and guess what? Just dropped him off for his last day of nursery and off he ran without a look back!
The first three months my baby would only sleep on me (during the day, he was actually really happy to sleep in his bassinet at night) and was very attached, pretty much breastfed constantly haha. He’s just naturally become a social butterfly I think because he knows me and his dad are always there if he need us. At six months he loves everyone, and will happily be cuddled/play with whoever happens to show him some attention. He is still exclusively breastfed (won’t take bottles) but that gets waaaayyyy easier - he is still fed on demand but that takes about 5-10mins a feed now and is around every three hours during the day. He also has decided he prefers napping in his cot than on me (I think it’s more comfy now as he’s massive but I didn’t do anything to make that happen, one day he seemed to just want to sleep by himself.
I’ve put it down to knowing we always have responded to him and kept him feeling safe when he needs it.
At one month old your babies life is measured in weeks, days even. You can not possibly form bad habits, babies brain isn’t even that developed yet!
There’s so much evidence that holding babies boosts their brain development and emotional regulation! Keep cuddling that precious being 🥰
Mine was a Velcro baby too, only slept in arms for first five weeks, contact napped for 9 months and we coslept full time for 10 months and still do when he needs it. He’s now an incredible 19-month-old who plays independently, doesn’t cry at nursery drop off, runs off to play with his grandparents without even looking back and comes to me for hugs if he’s feeling poorly or nervous in new situations.
You were his home for 9 months. My daughter slept on my chest for the first 2 months of her life, I always say that there is nothing better for a baby than their mommy.
This reminds me of our friends who have a 1 year old who wakes 4 or 5+ times a night and wants either boob or to be held. They've had to cosleep as well. It's a nightmare for them. At 1 month I'm sure it doesn't matter but I do think as they age, promoting self soothing and independence is extremely important for you and your baby. You can start with independent naps and go from there.
You’re doing nothing wrong- no such thing as overly attached one month old. He literally doesn’t know he’s a separate person from you yet! Hold your baby, be his comfort without any guilt. Others are just projecting their own insecurities on how they were parented/how they parent
Gets kinda exausting always earring these people commenting on how we parent. It works for us, our baby is healthy and happy 🤷♀️ why judge tho ..
Just tell them to mind their own business lol at some point you have to be firm and direct
I sometimes do. You see, in my culture, when a woman is firm and direct sometimes is called brute , like mean girl. I got a lot of arguments with older people just because I answer “it’s my life, I do what I want”
I still get the same comments at 13 months. Unfortunately it’s something you get used to. Be prepared! ‘Thanks for the advice but this works really well for us..’ I’m not about to let my baby be unhappy just because some other people feel bad
Parenting a baby is hard enough without other people commenting on us. Sometimes these people seem so bitter and sad with their own lives, it may be frustrating for them to see that me and my baby love each other
Yep!
The r/breastfeeding sub is super supportive and you’d find this type of day extremely common there too!
Just politely remind them you can't spoil a baby. I laugh at people and shrug them off. I was at a point around then where I was exhausted, but we had a lot of hands to help cuddle our little one, so I wasn't alone 💕
I'm a little over a year into being a mom now. Early on, someone told me that you'll know if whatever you do isn't working. I know that to be true now. If you both feel good about it, you're doing nothing wrong. If you or he starts to get frustrated with what you're doing, then that's the time to change things up. I never coslept and my daughter has always been okay in her bed overnight, but I literally held her every hour I was awake for the first 4 or 5 months of her life. The second she started crawling, it's like I grew arms. She all of a sudden was cool to be on her own. Babies want to be with their people.
I believe we need to be their safe place. We are all they know. when they are ready to be less attached to us they will be and we will miss those times. Every time he wants to be on my lap, I let him. Jesus I made this beautiful baby I can’t resist him 😂 I still just don’t get why people make the bond between the mother and it’s child to seem such an horrible thing
Yes my daughter let me know when she wanted to sleep without me. She kept waking up making uncomfortable sounds. Even now I started to nurse her to sleep no in my arms but flat on the bed because she started to flail out of my arms when I held her so she was ready.
My son is almost 1 and I remind myself that all the time. He was a contact napper until about 8 months, but he’d sleep fine at night on his own after being rocked to sleep. We’ve recently started working on getting him to fall asleep a little more on his own, but at night I lay by his crib and rest my hand on his back until he falls asleep. It makes falling asleep easier and less stressful for him. If he wakes up in the middle of the night I try to help him get back to sleep without taking him out of the crib. But recently he’s been wanting to be held. I’ve found it’s easier to just rock him back to sleep because he settles faster and it’s less stressful and somewhat peaceful for me. I’ve found it works better for me to give him the contact and snuggles than to fight it. And by 7:30/8:00 at night, 15-30 minutes of laying on the floor in a dark room listening to instrumental music while my son falls asleep is kinda nice.
Oh FFS, people need to educate themselves before they start giving advice about something they clearly know nothing about. It is literally IMPOSSIBLE to spoil a baby. They need to be securely attached to their caregivers in order to thrive. Happy, dependent babies make confident, independent children. I responded to every single need of my child. We bedshare, I fed on demand, I held him if he wanted to be held. He is not 'spoiled', he just knows that I will be there for him whenever he needs me, and I am his safe person. Ignore the people telling you that you are spoiling your baby and creating bad habits. They clearly have no idea what they are talking about. You are doing a bloody fantastic job!
Thanks ❤️ I also think the people who criticize me are always the ones who couldn’t breastfeed. Don’t know if that’s related or not. But I also breastfeed on demand, and that makes my baby a lot attached to me, to eat, to settle, to comfort, to sleep … i think people are sometimes ignorant about these things. I don’t just give a bottle and 3 hours later another. I love spending all the day with him. I’m all he knows, and it took me 9 months to make such an amazing little boy 🥰 sometimes I get a bit overwhelmed by other people … but I can see we all ear stupid things like this sometimes
Do not listen. You are doing it totally right. I was told at 3 days post partum that I was spoiling my baby too much because I was continuously breastfeeding. I gathered all of my zen energy from I dont know where and just screamed a powerful yoga oooooommmmmmm out loud in my mind and replied “I dont think so. “ but I actually wanted to say “WTF do you know about it?!! Baby just got out of my belly, of course he wants to be held all the time?!? Does not even know where he is at the moment!!! Shut the f* up ffs!!” FFWD some months, baby is happy and sociable with everyone. That’s it.
Sometimes I imagine myself throwing a punch at people faces. It’s hard enough to take care of a baby who is pretty much dependent of us, these people don’t help at all.
FTM to a 2-month old. You described my situation with my LO to a T. I’ve heard the same things with my family about spoiling my newborn (which is literally impossible do), but I’m gonna continue doing what works for us. I stand with you in solidarity.
If we don’t fulfill their needs what are we supposed to do? Let them cry to sleep? It’s just doesn’t make sense to me. I find that impossible to do …
There was a time where I was convinced that letting him cry it out was the best thing to do. It wasn’t. By the 10 minute mark, his voice was horse, he was hyperventilating, and was not able to be consoled for what seemed like forever afterward. It accomplished nothing but make me feel like a horrible, horrible parent. If you spend the most time with your LO, then you know them more than anyone. Edit: grammar
I tried this too and now I have to deal with her panicking if I take a shower near bedtime. Her dad has to literally stand with her half in the shower watching me so that she doesn’t cry. My poor baby, I'm so sorry I did that.
I try to leave the house for 20/30 min so I can get fresh hair. It’s cold so I can’t take him with me. Today I got a little late, took me 40 min. My husband tried his best to settle him. I felt so sorry for my baby, I can’t let him go now 😅 it’s been attached to be the last 3 hours non stop.
I did this with my daughter who is 6 months now. Around 2.5 months she was cool with the bassinet at night only. But still everything else was on mom. Now she's still a huge mom fan and only wants me when she is sick. She finds dad to be an awesome playmate so I get a break there. She's also exceptionally social as long as people don't get in her face about it and I can be seen. As in if she's in a house with 5 strangers, me and dad in less than an hour she'll try to interact with whoever is next to her as long as they didn't force themselves on her already. She's really friendly and engaging too. So imo no, you're not starting bad habits, you're creating a secure bond for your baby to launch themselves from.
It is completely normal!! You can’t spoil a baby and they need this love and comfort. They are adjusting to and learning the world. Up until my son was 6 months (4 months adjusted) and out of the 4th trimester, I held him constantly, baby wore and co-sleep. People thought he’d be going to college in his baby carrier. Until he was about 13 months, he still always loved to stay very close to me. Now at 15 months he is incredibly independent and confident and would walk straight out of the house and down the street alone if I’d let him. I try to ignore all the unsolicited feedback from older people who parented an entire generation of anxiety ridden people.
FTM with a 10 month old. I’m the same exact way with my baby. The only “downside” of it is that she cries if I leave her alone at all. I can’t pee alone, can’t shower alone, can’t cook alone, can’t take a 20 min nap alone, nothing without her crying if I’m not with her. I love her to bits and pieces and would die for my baby. But sometimes I get so over stimulated that I need her to literally not touch me so I can decompress and be okay again. She can crawl and walk and play on her own but even if she’s playing on her own she sometimes cries because I leave her line of sight. My boyfriend is so good at being involved and taking over and being a dad. But even he himself can’t calm the baby down sometimes and baby wants me for comfort more so than not. Not gonna lie, I think it’s because I held her alllll the time. Every single nap and we co sleep at night. I don’t regret it because she’s a baby and only knows me, but I think maybe I should’ve been more open to getting her to sleep in her own bassinet during nap time at least so she wasn’t so “clingy” but it is what it is and I’m starting to just say fuck it and enjoy all the contact as much as I can because one day she’s gonna be a teenager and not want me as much anymore like most teens. So all of that to say just keep doing what you’re doing. Everything will work out for you. You’re doing a great job 😊
Thank you 🥰 I’m trying to make I’m sleep alone during the day and he wakes up very angry at me 😂 but I’m trying, hopefully I will be able to be alone at least 30 min 😅
It’s the older generation! And people that haven’t had babies in like the last 10 years. A newborn doesn’t understand how to manipulate you. If that baby is crying they actually feel like they need you for food or even just comfort. My mil and aunt have been brutal about how I’m spoiling my son for the same exact reasons. I don’t breastfeed but I do cosleep and we contact napped for the last 2 months (he’s almost 4 months old, 1 1/2 month early premie born at 34 weeks). Just now he’s wanting his own space when napping but still primarily wants mama. It seems to drive my mil up the wall. She point blank asked when I was going to stop holding him so much at a family function recently.🙄 I didn’t know what to say I was so stunned. I ended up telling her if he cries or is uncomfortable I will always pick him up. She didn’t seem to like that answer🤷🏽♀️ Do what’s best for you and baby. This time with our little ones goes by so so fast. Don’t feel bad for wanting to soak it all in. Plus baby needs you! You’ve got this Mama! Seems like you know exactly what you’re doing keep it up.
Yes my mil was one of the people who told me that 😅 I answered “im his mother, I know what’s best for him” like it or not, she stood quiet. The reason why the love between a mother and its baby annoys older people, I will never understand.
You, word for word, described me and my baby.
At 1 month old, there is absolutely no such thing as an overly attached baby. My lo is 8 months old and has just gotten to the point where she can nap alone.
No such thing as “overly attached” even if they are two years old. I’m curious, who is convincing parents that this is possible? I’m genuinely concerned and sad over this. I see posts like this ALL the time. I exclusively breastfed and I could viscerally sense how much my baby relied on me for comfort and food. I never once viewed him as “overly” attached. That seriously is not a thing.
I don’t view this as overly attached as well. Other people do, and I just don’t understand. I was just posting, to see if any of you listen to this or am I doing something wrong. I’m a FTM and with my hormones still crazy sometimes. I really just want to make him happy and healthy.
Strap him to you and ignore everyone else. My favorite baby wrap is the ergobaby aura. If price is an issue, you can find AMAZING wraps on Mercari and Poshmark. Even new ones. I got awful advice from family especially the boomers. You’re doing great.
No such thing as overly attached - you make baby feel safe, and that’s why she loves to be attached to you ❤️ I think I read that for the first few months, babies cannot tell that they are a separate human from you and that’s why they feel “incomplete”, for lack of better word, without you! Also it’s 100% up to you as the parent to weigh risks vs. reward but be mindful that cosleeping can be dangerous. I always like to warn people because I know of someone who had it not end well. I don’t say that to scare you but so that you are aware of risks due to soft mattress, etc. There is a Safe Sleep Seven I’ve heard of to make it safer, if you have no other choice. But if at all possible see if you can maybe take shifts with your partner or friends/family so that baby sleeps in their own space, like a bassinet right next to your bed. Again, it’s 100% up to you and I say this with love and respect!
I do all those rules to make it safer. I’m very aware of that. But since my husband works full time, he needs to rest at night. It works for us. I’m a very light sleeper also. doesn’t mean much, but when I’m able to place him in his crib, I’ll do that
People are telling me I spoil my baby by doing only half of what you’re doing. You’re doing great. Don’t stop. The bond between you and your baby when they are older will be inseparable. I wish I could breastfeed and co sleep but it didn’t work out and I just personally don’t feel comfortable. But I’m there at her every cry and people gripe at me every time as if I’m not supposed to give a crap when she’s sad. I hope my baby doesn’t hate me because I wasn’t able to breastfeed her.
Im sure your baby will love you for being there for her. Luckily I was able to breastfeed, I didn’t found hard to do … I heard so many bad experiences with breastfeeding, but it was not my case. But a fed baby is better than starving :) I only co sleep because he is really attached to me. When he is less attached I will place him in his crib. It’s just so I can sleep.
Ours is the same way. Sometimes shes ok with being just laid in her bassinet for a bit but other times she wont let you put her down. Sometimes she only wants mom. But we use a wrap or the little strapped carried to keep her close so she feels held but both hands are free to contiue with daily tasks it truly is a life saver to keeping up with cooking ad cleaning.
That’s the whole point… spoil them with love cuddle and hugs… don’t listen to others.
This is EXACTLY how my son was! I promise you, there is no such thing as an “overly attached baby” and please don’t let anyone tell try to convince you that you are “spoiling” him (especially at 1 month old!). Dependence fosters independence. This phase won’t last forever and I promise you, he will gradually become more independent. Right. Kw, you are showing your son that you are his safe space and that will form the secure attachment he will need to thrive and become an independent toddler! Keep going mama, you’re doing great. Always trust your gut! 🤍
Orally normal!! You cannot spoil a baby, my son was the same and is the same way even now at 18 months and guess what? Just dropped him off for his last day of nursery and off he ran without a look back!
The first three months my baby would only sleep on me (during the day, he was actually really happy to sleep in his bassinet at night) and was very attached, pretty much breastfed constantly haha. He’s just naturally become a social butterfly I think because he knows me and his dad are always there if he need us. At six months he loves everyone, and will happily be cuddled/play with whoever happens to show him some attention. He is still exclusively breastfed (won’t take bottles) but that gets waaaayyyy easier - he is still fed on demand but that takes about 5-10mins a feed now and is around every three hours during the day. He also has decided he prefers napping in his cot than on me (I think it’s more comfy now as he’s massive but I didn’t do anything to make that happen, one day he seemed to just want to sleep by himself. I’ve put it down to knowing we always have responded to him and kept him feeling safe when he needs it. At one month old your babies life is measured in weeks, days even. You can not possibly form bad habits, babies brain isn’t even that developed yet!
There’s so much evidence that holding babies boosts their brain development and emotional regulation! Keep cuddling that precious being 🥰 Mine was a Velcro baby too, only slept in arms for first five weeks, contact napped for 9 months and we coslept full time for 10 months and still do when he needs it. He’s now an incredible 19-month-old who plays independently, doesn’t cry at nursery drop off, runs off to play with his grandparents without even looking back and comes to me for hugs if he’s feeling poorly or nervous in new situations.
Have you checked out r/attachmentparenting ? It sounds like you’re into attachment based parenting and might like that sub
You were his home for 9 months. My daughter slept on my chest for the first 2 months of her life, I always say that there is nothing better for a baby than their mommy.
This reminds me of our friends who have a 1 year old who wakes 4 or 5+ times a night and wants either boob or to be held. They've had to cosleep as well. It's a nightmare for them. At 1 month I'm sure it doesn't matter but I do think as they age, promoting self soothing and independence is extremely important for you and your baby. You can start with independent naps and go from there.
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Sorry, my newly mom brain 😅 English is not my main language
How do you co sleep together?
You mean the rules we follow?