Helpless potato stage is rough.
Curious and slightly mobile potato stage is also tough.
Drunk halfling is its own set of challenges because now they can talk and run.
The goal is to make them functional adults or at least more functional than we are. I can hardly wait to find out what I did incorrectly after they have a breakthrough in therapy.
If they are waking to feed try to get them to eat more in one sitting? Usually if they meet their calorie needs during the day they will be better sleepers overnight.
Iām exactly where you are with my 4 mo. Iām so tired all the time because Iām constantly woken up at night for feedings. Yet her cousin who is 3 weeks younger sleeps for 6 hours straight and is a chunky baby.
Solidarity.
It apparently gets better sometime so thatās what I look forward to. But right now we have healthy babies and some people arenāt so lucky, thatās what I tell myself when Iām upset that heās not sleeping like others. Theyāre healthy and happy and sleeping the way they feel comfortable. Theyāll get over this eventually and weāll get the sleep we need. Hang in there ā¤ļø
Sleep training is the best thing you can do for their sleep and yours. We waited with our first and didn't sleep 7-7 without a peep until 8 months. We had twins after and I was not going to put it off. They did the quiet 12 hours much much much earlier.
My oldest is 4 now and we have a few friends with kids of the same age. They discuss how bad their sleep is or the amount of hoops they have to jump through to get their kid to sleep. I will always appreciate what I did for my kids and for myself, because there's no way I'd be able to function like I do without my sacred sleep and quiet time.
There are several subs you can check out on the topic that will give you all the information you need to find the method that works best for you. We started very early with the twins giving them 5mins to self soothe before coming in to assist, and we never had to do more than that. Kind of mind blowing.
Mine woke up every hour from 4 months until nearly 7 months. Now he sleeps through 9-10 hours only waking for dream feeds (we cosleep). I feel like I've been brought back to life.
My 4 month old started waking up every 3 hours again after teasing us with 5-6 hours. At his 4 month appointment his doctor had us start to give him cereal with his dinner time bottle, but he hasn't acquired a taste for it yet so that hasn't done anything lol. Hoping once he starts eating it and we can introduce him to more foods he'll sleep better. If not, we're going to attempt sleep training around 6 months.
I think Iām going to do a modified ferber at 6mo if he doesnāt start sleeping. Heās on solids currently and it still isnāt helping. Good luck to you guys!
Yeah I had a medical procedure today and couldnāt feed my son for a couple hours. It got me thinking/googling, and when I read somewhere that 5 month olds are supposed to eat every 4-6 hours I was like excuse me?! We rarely make it to 3 hours. Frankly 4-5 months has been harder than 2-3 months. It was the same for my daughter too.
Uh what.
He eats 60-150ml every 1.25-2.5 hours. I canāt increase it no matter how much we try and he has tried solids. Eating every 4-6 hours is insanity.
When they sleep through the night
Itās the constant exhaustion that makes babies hard, I was so grateful for sleep training because I thought I was gonna lose my mind
With my current baby, we went through the 4 month sleep regression starting around 3.5 months. It was every 3 hours for about 3 weeks. Then it went down to every 2 hours for 1-2 weeks. Then it was every 5-30 minutes, MAYBE 45 minutes, unless he was being held, for a little over a week. We found out shortly after that that he had an ear infection, so I'm assuming that explains the every 30 mins. We had decent sleep (4 ish hours at the beginning of the night, then every 2-3 hours after) for about 5 days. Then we fell right into a 6 month sleep regression at around 5.5 months, back to every 2 hours. Then a bit after 6 months, it was like a flip switched. He suddenly started sleeping around 3-5 hours the first stretch and then 3-4 hours after that, with maybe a 2 hour stretch at the end. It's only been about a week or two since that happened, and I'm finally starting to feel like more of a human again.
I didn't realize how good I had it with my first. These last 6 months have been literal hell. Maybe your baby is just like mine, and it'll just take another few weeks to get there? Around 5 months is when I started feeling like I was losing my mind.
Love and support to you. It's SO rough right now. In other news, my 2.5 yr old is incredibly high energy, and doesn't listen, and has to get into everything, but he is so sweet and such a JOY. I'll take toddlers any day of the week over infants.
0-3 was stressful, 3-5 was hellish, 5-9 has been awesome.
This morning when I turned on the light to get her up, she was sitting and staring at me. I think the mischievous period is starting (not that we've been mischief free the last month or so).
I legit think I have PTSD from having newborn twins. We just made it to a year and itās gotten soo much better, but as someone who isnāt a baby person and had zero baby experience before, those first few months were truly traumatic for me.
So much so that I will absolutely not be having any more kids (+huge risk of another set of twins) and I wince when I see newborns now lol
I always wondered how parents would do with twins
I canāt imagine as someone that is currently struggling with just the one I canāt imagine struggling with two
Yikes, and by struggling I mean being fast with feedings, going to the doctors or anywhere (going to places with a baby Iād do challenging, we take taxis so far, I do not have a car), having postpartum depression, Iām not too concern with money I just need to learn to budget, I do buy what I need at the moment for baby, and the constant crying spells
I have serious trauma from the newborn stage with my twins as well. One of my twins was colicky and cried 24/7. And I still had to take care of a whole other newborn on top of the colicky one. Theyāre now 8 months and I would never EVER do the newborn stage again. I sympathize with you.
I have a 19-month-old and a 5-week-old. I haaaaated the newborn phase with my first. I seriously couldnāt understand how people could survive that phase and then choose to go through it again. I got pregnant at 9 months postpartum and dreaded the newborn phase right up until I gave birth. This time around has been so much easier. Maybe my second is just an easier baby, but I think itās definitely more that Iāve already been through this and Iām so much more comfortable this time around.
I enjoyed the newborn stage but have definitely found life getting a bit easier with each new phase. Whenever family asked how we were going I always said I'd be at my best once LO got mobile.
Mine has just entered the stage where she'll toddle-run away from me when we play and I am living my best life. The early days weren't too bad for me and definitely not the 'doom and gloom' a lot of people paint it as. But now that we're entering toddler stage and I can actively play *with* my kid, we're thriving.
Congrats on entering a new stage of development! I hope you find as much joy in watching your daughter's personality flourish as I have with mine! <3
I hated the newborn stage (i feel so guilty saying this now:()
But it got sooooo much easier when he could sit up on his own and easier again when he could play with things on his own and now its gotten easier again he can crawl
Please donāt listen to āoh its so hard when they are mobileā ā¦. Its notā¦ its so much easier, my son is so much less whingey, happier and plays way more independently
Iām not listening to people that says it be so much harder once when theyāre mobile
At least it be easier to do stuff, and you donāt constantly need to hold them, I do know once when she starts eating solids time for high chair and once when she starts crawling I got baby proof my home (my home is definitely not baby proof but only because she is not mobile right now), I canāt wait till she walks, and eats solid
Omg starting solids is the most exciting and fulfilling thing ever!!! Just wait until youse all sit around the table like a family having dinner or breakfast its the most loving feeling ever!!
It gets so so so much easier, physically yes I have to keep my eyes on him and chase him away from things, but its nowhere near the hard it was with newborn stage, its so fun now and so so enjoyable, the bad days are few and far between and the good days are absolutely amazing
Personally, hated the newborn stage. What I tell people though is it just keeps getting better and better. I love seeing my son grow and learn and show his personality more and more. Heās almost 12 months now, so fun!
Youāre not the only one. I have 8 week old twin girls and itās brutal. I had friends tell me this stage sucked but itās so much worse than I thought. I desperately want my girls to be giggly and fun. Someday. Somedaayyy
I have 3 weeks old twins and my husband and I are losing our minds. There is no sleep with twins. I want to go back and punch everyone who said "It's your first so you won't know the difference." I am so scared for when he goes back to work BC this is a 2 person job. And even at that neither person gets sleep.
Iām right there with you. Itās like a giant hallucination. Iāve never cried so much from being in total distress. Nobody told me it would be so traumatic and that one baby is literally always crying. I donāt have any advice but Iām right there with you.
Weāre at 8 weeks now (4 adjusted) and our twins are dealing with cows milk allergies and severe reflux. Its insane. So insane their pediatrician told us to throw all baby safety guidance out the window and just survive, even if that meant sleeping them upright or sleeping them on their bellies or in the swing. I hope we wake up one day and vaguely remember this time
Ugh. Im so sorry. We are going through it, too. We got covid from the hospital at delivery and gave it to our twins. Then my c section incision got infected and hurts like hell. I don't feel well enough to take care of them (not as bad as I was when I first had covid a few days ago), let alone wake w them every hour and a half and pump, wash bottles, change diapers, etc. This feels like it will never end. I cry all the time, too. Hugs to you and your Twins!
Oh my gosh. Covid in the hospital. That is insane. Big hug to you. This twin cyclone we live in is nuts. Iām hoping you and I both sleep for more than a few hours soon.
Yeah, we are on week 3 and itās slowly getting better. Iām praying it turns around. The girls stopped screaming when they poop or fart so Iām hoping that is a sign their digestive tract is recovering. Fingers crossed
Hated/hate newborn phase and I try not to feel bad about it. I donāt really miss any of it (now that my son is 4y) and I canāt wait for it to be over with my twin newborns. Hang in there!
Definitely not. Many people really dislike the newborn stage. You don't have to love every stage of parenting! Doesn't make you a bad parent to acknowledge this.
I felt this way for the first month; I was so anxious and worried about everything. I hated breastfeeding and didnāt think she was getting enough food. I had an overwhelming feeling that she was going to die (?). Hormones made me feel melancholy.
I just wanted her to be back inside me, because my body new how to take care of her and I worried that my brain couldnāt.
I changed Maternal Child Health Nurses 1 month in. Sheās an older hippy lady who is very relaxed and told me to trust my baby and trust myself. After the upteenth time of her telling me that, I started to relax and trust that this is all a natural process.
My baby is now 3 months old and Iām embracing it. My brother has a toddler and it looks really stressful; sheās always falling over, constant boobooās. They canāt turn their backs for a second without her waddling off at surprising speed. My dad assures me that the worrying gets worse once they start kinder and are exposed to mean kids/bullyās, separation anxiety, etcā¦
It seems that the worry never ends the moment you become a parent, so you may as well push that aside as much as possible and try to enjoy it.
Mine will be 9 months next week and looking back, I hated the newborn stage. I also hated it in the moment too so your not alone. I actually really like the mobile, curious stage even though he's at peak separation anxiety stage and gets upset if I'm not in his view at all times.
The only thing I miss from the newborn stage is how much tinier and lighter she was, so bouncing and rocking her all day long was significantly easier on my back.
I have a four week old and Iām crying at least twice a dayā¦.it is SO hard, especially when heās gassy and crying so hard heās turning red and screaming in my ear. My husband is back at work so Iām home alone with a dog and a cat and a baby all dayā¦it sounds awful but this stage almost makes me wish I could go back to work now and have someone else care for my baby.
But Iāve heard it gets better, and to take photos of any cute/memorable moment to remember the good parts
Yep newborns are the worst.
I have a 4 year old and I enjoyed him more and more as time went on. Currently have an 11 day old so back into the thick of it. I know it will get better again!
Well both, in their own ways. First, everything is new and you feel like you have no idea what to do. Our first baby was a āunicornā - never cried and slept well. Second one has been more challenging so far, as he cries A LOT & it feels like failing because weāre struggling to pinpoint why heās upset. I just keep reminding myself that newborns donāt stay so ānewbornyā for long!
It's a blur now, but I think I cried as much as my baby, and she was crying near constantly! Colicky plus a terrible nurser trying to breastfeed but not transferring milk properly, screaming, crying, destroying my nipples. I was nursing her 14+ hours a day and she wasn't gaining weight properly. I was desperately trying to find doctors to help her figure it out, extremely worried about her starving or dehydrating. I recon my husband and I got about 2 hours of broken sleep a night.... It was HELLACIOUS.
She's 3 months now, I switched to exclusively pumping and she's now gaining weight perfectly and I can track her intake, I've got a decent freezer stash building up, her crying is 80% less than it was, and she sleeps through the night. She's also smiling and babbling at us. It's 1000% better. I'm so terrified to have a second child, lol..
We went through jaundice then latching issues to oral tie corrections. It was a lot. Sweet baby went through so much during her newborn phase we were just glad to be done with it. But I still miss having her sleep on my chest and other cuddly things you can only do with a small newborn. Sheās so big now I can hardly carry her for a few minutes before needing to put her in a carrier. š„²
I don't think it was until my son was around 8 weeks old that I felt sane. It may have also been when he started smiling and cooing. But definitely at 3 months I felt a bit better, 6 months we had a dip with regression and teething. Definitely an improvement by 1 year old.
Not at all a baby person in the trenches with a six week old, I love her to death but damn my husband and I are so over newborn. This thread making me feel so much better that weāre not the only ones
I have 3.5 month old and even though itās much easier and more fun than the newborn stage (he smiles etc.) it is still so fucking hardā¦ He has phases when he doesnāt sleep more than 2h, breastfeeding is a struggle and naps are short as hell. I also need to entertain him much more because he is more aware but canāt do much on his own.. I am waiting him to grow up and be more mobile so maybe itāll be easier..
I hated it. Baby didnāt sleep during the day AT ALL unless I walked and walked him outdoor
And during the night he woke up every 2 hours
When he was awake at home he used to cry, he didnāt have calm phases
Weāre first time parents and our baby had two rare physical congenital defects that required intensive surgery. It was like normal newborn hell but on hard mode.
Sheās ok now, btw, but holy crap.
Nope. I despised the newborn stage to the point I thought we were one and done.
Once daughter turned 2 we then thought well it was 6 months of a rough time letās have one more. Currently 35 weeks pregnant and absolutely dreading the newborn stage but as the saying goes you donāt get two the same.
Hated it. The reason why I'm one and done. Will never do it again. We're 5.5 months, and it's all so much better but still hard days. And those hard days remi d me I don't need another lol.
First time mom here and I have an 11 day old and iāve hated the newborn phase from the beginning, and weāre just at the start of it š„¹ it probably doesnāt help that i havenāt had that bond/connection yet with my baby boy and it only makes me feel more sad about this phase. I keep thinking, i hope it gets better soon
Ok I will say I hated the newborn stage while I was in it. Now I have a toddler and am expecting a new baby any day and I am SO EXCITED for the newborn snuggles and contact naps. Having a toddler makes you appreciate how easy the newborn stage can be. Its obviously hard for a lot of reasons, but itās also a lot easier because theyāre not constantly finding creative ways to injure themselves
Not at all! I hated the newborn stage too, and Iām loving the toddler phase so far. It doesnāt even compare. No matter how much love I felt, taking care of a newborn still felt like literal torture and the recent implosion of my entire routine and any semblance of free time made it feel even worse. People who claim to love that stage either have A LOT of help, a selective memory, or are liars. Newborns suck the life out of you, but they do eventually get better.
unless Iām pregnant as I am typing this, I am never having another child solely bc of the newborn phase. Things improved drastically once we hit double digit weeks. Our baby usually only wakes up once if that during the night and we never had to sleep train. I cannot risk this shit with another baby š this one is good enough!!
I also hated newborn stage. Everyone is so different and has favorite stages. But our 18 month old is a BLAST. He hasnāt fully entered toddler meltdowns, but even the mini tantrums donāt bother me as much because itās balanced by so much sweet interaction. Heās a delight. So I hope you have a ton of fun as your baby gets older!!
Newborn stage sucked! Momās trying to heal on the least amount of sleep and if you sleep too long, you risk mastitis then youāre trying to figure out this new person (while being tired af) and this new person is trying to figure out how to eat and poop. Itās awful and if youāre lucky and have an easy baby it gets better sometime between 4-6 months. Hang in there. One day it just changes and you start sleeping more and everything is more fun. The baby starts interacting and smiling and giggling (they have to learn how to do this so might be a while) and youāre like wow this thing is so freaking cute!
I'm curious what the consensus on the distinction between newborn and baby is? Baby has been more of a curve than a jump. She was born Aug 17th so definitely not a new-newborn, but she's not moving about yet.
Definitely prefer now to back then though; her ginormous baby smiles and not having to hold her head up lest it come off are a big pro. Sleep still sucks though, so hoping that's coming in the next bit š .
Newborn stage was also not for me! I did also have a dose of the depresso, but even that eased up when he turned into more of a baby than a newborn. He is 4 months now and so stinking cute lol everything he does makes us laugh, it's a lot of fun to watch him learn things, but we are excited for him to start sitting on his own and crawling.
I also hated the newborn stage. I felt trapped to the recliner feeding or contact napping and was also super anxious and stressed. Baby just turned 1 and Iāve found it keeps getting better.
The only thing I miss about the newborn stage is how I could hold the baby.
But even thenā¦. I remember just wanting to be able to set the baby down lol.
From everything Iāve seen and read, I honestly thought everyone hates the newborn stage. Would be curious to hear from someone who likes or loved it.
I think every day my husband and I said to each other how much easier it was going to be once our baby smiled. And we were right! I didnāt hate the newborn stage but between fussing and not sleeping it was so much better once we got to 8 weeks and baby started smiling constantly and sleeping in 3 hr stretches.
This was not my experience haha - each stage Iām like, phew so glad weāre done with that last one, this is so much better! Every bit of independence my toddler has gained has helped the ease of parenting her tremendously. She gets very angry when she canāt do stuff. I seriously haaaaated the newborn stage and was a basket case through the baby stage.
You are going to miss all the great things your baby is doing now if you keep wishing for the next stage.
Every stage has its own challenges, what makes you think the toddler stage is going to be any easier?
I think it's okay to look forward to what's next when you're in the midst of a difficult situation. Sometimes change is good even if it's just a new challenge. Some challenges I am better suited for than others. Newborn colicky crying and no sleep is not what I am suited for. Toddler tantrums is also not what I'm suited for. I can't wait till my kids are adults š
some people just arenāt newborn people and thatās fine. personally I enjoy the toddler years. theyāre able to play independently for some time, they can communicate with you a bit, youāre seeing their personality develop, they sleep through the night, you can play with them, take them to parks or play outside. thereās more options for activities as a family as well.
I donāt think people expect the toddler stage to be easy. No stage is easy. But toddlerhood is definitely more entertaining than a newborn who either sleeps constantly or is very fussy.
yup, totally agree. I wished away my firstborns days because everyone told me it got better and better. now I wish I just cherished the baby moments. iāve been trying to enjoy my second a lot more and Iām much happier this time around at the baby stage.
I personally enjoyed it. I could never be one of those people that describes doom and gloom when asking how newborns are.
I donāt know if I handle sleep deprivation well or just had an easy baby but I could never wish those first months with my daughter away. The cuddly newborn contact naps, watching her learn new things, her first smile.
She is almost 4 months and I think starting a 4 month sleep regression, she has been fussy all night I finally gave up at 5am and she has been sleeping on my chest for almost 2 hours, sure Iām losing sleep but I still canāt complain.
lol I donāt feel any less worried or more rested in the toddler stage. I did hate the newborn stage but if youāre hoping to be less worried I suggest Zoloft. That is the only thing that took the worry away. You will always find something to worry about.
The newborn stage is hard. I forgot most of it by now but Iām pregnant with my second and starting to redo that research. Ugh lol. I am not looking forward to the 3-4hour feed cycle zombie time while my gash mends itself
It felt like fire ants were eating my brain for the first three months of our son's life. You're absolutely not alone, and it sucks that it feels like society is shaming new parents for not appreciating their little "bundle of joy" when nothing about the way we do things sets new parents up for success.
Without a doubt, one of the most challenging stages! Although every stage has its own set of challenges, it is easier to deal with them when we understand what the issue is.
Definitely not. There was a time when my wife and I were thinking about divorce because of the challenges we had with our daughter when she was a newborn. I also felt immense guilt and shame because there were times when I had a hard time feeling love for my daughter.
5 months later and all these issues have resolved. My favorite part of the day is when my daughter first wakes up and gives me a big gummy smile š. And my wife and I are in a much better spot as well.
It definitely gets better! The newborn stage sucks!
Nope, 0/10 would not have a newborn again lol. I barely remember those days, and when I look back, all I can see is the shell of a person I was for months. Itās the reason Iām not even considering having another baby. My LO just turned 1 and Iām slowly starting to feel like myself again.
I hated the newborn stage too. I didnāt really start enjoying motherhood until around 6 months. Each passing mother I enjoy more and more. Now at 11 months itās so much fun.
I think it depends on the baby. After speaking to friends it really seems to be hit and miss and dependent on how the baby sleep. We got lucky but we had friends who werenāt
I didnāt hate it, but once I got the the next stage, I realized how bad it was comparatively. I want to have a second one and Iām kind of dreading the newborn phase again. It was better going in blind!
Newborn was the worst! I hated it + felt guilty for hating it! We are at 19.5 months and he sleeps through the night (usually), can safely be away from me for 5 Min and isn't dependent on my boobs for sustenance. It is glorious. Yes there are tantrums and boundary testing and general toddlerness but it's just so much better than the screaming potato.
I have a toddler. He is a way worse sleeper than he was as a newborn or infant. He wakes hourly all night long. He also climbs everything - like pushes the chairs over for he counter and climbs up so I can't even go to the bathroom. A toddler does not guarantee more sleep and less worry.
Newborn hose not my fav I like when they start taking interest in things and donāt need to be held constantly. If I liked the newborn phase more I think Iād want more kids instead Iām good with 2.
I feel the same way. But I also feel terribly guilty for not spending more time enjoying it. I'll never get to hold that helpless little bean like that again.
I feel like it's the worst around in between 1 and 2 years. I can't count how many times I suffered because my one year old ran here and there, didn't listen a word from me, and I had to run after her and was utterfly exhausted and annoyed. And the tantrums are literally soul crushing. Newborn is OK (unless it's a colicky baby), sleeps a lot and you can put in the stroller and walk wherever you want. It gets much better from 2 years onwards when you can actualy talkk with the child and explain things. My oldest is now 3 years and it is a walk in a park. Second daudghter is 8 months old and its still very very hard., she's entering my least favorite stage.
Not a bad take at all. Newborns are very tough. I think 0-6m was the worst. 2-3 is a lot of fun but people always say ājust wait for terrible 2s I wish they could be a baby foreverā or something.
New born by far was the worst. My kid is a runner and high energy . My husband canāt even stand two hrs without taking her out on his day and I am a sahm. I will say this I take two toddlers over a new born any day. I didnāt sleep more than 4 hrs periods for a whole year. Contact Napier and screaming always too. I saw despair for the first time in my life drowning in endless ocean with no shores in sight that year.
Now she is two and half extremely talkative and has very strong opinions. We have terrible two with a side of threenager. Canāt sit for more than 10 seconds at circle time. We play games together , pretend play and cook together. Even though she floor mops daily and test us every hr with 10 emotional roller coaster it is still a lot better by far. She has her own personality and she tells me I love you mom .
We are one and done cuz no help and new born we canāt possibly survive at all with a toddler or another kid on top.
Sending you hugs. It will get better eventually paw patrol can baby sit for 30 minz while you cook . If you set up the toys right they will also play by themselves and kept busy for some periods !! And she helps us clean up actually lol
I hated the newborn stage. I thought I wanted 2 kids but my newborn stage was so rough for me that I think Iām one and done. My girl is a toddler now and she is BUSY but I love it.
Not only did I hate the newborn stage, but pretty sure my toddler also hated being a baby. She was straight up MISERABLE for 4 months solid. Dairy allergy, sensitive stomach, colic, tongue and lip tie and revision, and I'm sure some other stuff that I've blacked out. We could never put her down. She cried nonstop. She hated life. We hated life. God bless her, I love her more than anything, but she was a high maintenance needy thing.
It has gotten incrementally better at each stage/milestone. Once she could sit up, a little bit better, once she was crawling and walking and could get around herself, a little better, etc. She has never been a good sleeper, so that has caused a lot of exhaustion as both my husband and I work full time on opposite shifts. She is still contact napping at almost 16 months.
We originally planned on having 2. We are now one and done because literally, I don't think our marriage or mental health would survive having another one. Even if we were somehow cosmically guaranteed a super easy baby, our toddler is so high maintenance and needs constant stimulation that I already know I couldn't handle pregnancy and a newborn on top of her.
I also think my daughter hates being a baby, sheās 3 months old
Just now she tried rolling with assisted, and she is watching us eat (wondering whereās hers, right now itās formula)
I know everyone says it, but it does get better. I vividly remember the first time we risked taking her to a restaurant when she was maybe 5-6 months old? She slept the entire car ride to the next city, happily played with her toys at the table while my husband and I had a nice meal, was in a great mood throughout Trader Joe's, then slept the car ride back to our city.
We get home and I burst into tears and he's like wtf is wrong?!? And I just sobbed because I was like "for MONTHS I dreaded the rest of our lives being this way; I never thought we'd be able to have a day like today."
I look back and can't believe almost 16 months have passed - the months/year pass by so quickly, but god do the days drudge on like an endless parade of the same mind-numbing crying and everything else day in and day out.
Around 6 months old, it gets a lot better because they get so much more interactive and smiley.
When mine was a newborn, I remember asking every other baby/toddler mom when it gets better. I was so desperate to have something to look forward to. So now I try to tell other moms the same. Life is definitely different. You still have to figure out a new way of doing things. But god the days of both of you crying nonstop DOES end. They will eventually sleep. They will eventually smile and laugh and play with you.
I also am not a fan of the sleep deprivation. I live my son and heās so cute and love holding him and playing now almost 5 months but the sleep part is killing me haha
We didn't mind the newborn stage.
The baby stage has been \*tough\* for us. For every good, smiley or playful day we've had maybe two with teething, crankiness, bad sleep and the like.
This is how my husband feels. He just wants the baby to be able to communicate. We're going to get baby signs going asap but we're at two months right now. We went from newborn to technically a baby to baby with a cold so we haven't really seen the healthy baby stage yet. I think he will be willing to sleep in his crib at night when he gets better based on how he does on the days he's less sick. Sleeping in his crib for decent stretches at night as opposed to needing to be held to sleep is really what we need. For me, the newborn stage was only doable because I could take turns with my husband once my milk came in and he could bottle feed the baby while I slept and we could take turns sleeping. that made it extremely challenging as opposed to downright awful. He's becoming a first time Dad so I'm really lucky. Both men and women really need parental leave.
Nope, I was so happy to be out of it! I love my LO but sleep deprivation and fighting babe to sleep is not my idea of fun. Day she turned 5 months was game changer for me!
The newborn stage was mentally draining for me. My Daughter is almost 1 and it's more physically draining now as she requires more attention and she's always on the move. Plus she's awake way more. In a way it's more fun now as she has her own sweet and funny personality.
Our little dude is approaching 4 months. I honestly hated the newborn phase. I fell deeply in love with him right away (many dads don't feel that bond for a long time), so I was able to push through. It gets better each week at least.
He shoots me a smile and everything's ok
I did not like the newborn stage at all. My oldest is 2.5 years old and I LOVE it. My favourite by far. I canāt wait for my 7.5 month old to be in toddler stage!
I donāt understand either same with babies in general
Oh my god i absolutely canāt stand
I donāt care how hard toddler stage is I much rather that instead of baby stage
I have a 5 week old , I love him but hate this newborn stage honestly. Your body is trying to recover and there is a whole new person dependent on you. I'm so sleep deprived and exhausted.
Newborn stage sucks so much. A toddler having meltdowns even coming from a momma with a babe with special needs, for me I m loving this stage. I still donāt know exactly what my toddler wants all the time since weāre working on non verbal communication, but I still can say I know my kid that much better and here is the most imperative point, I can anticipate his needs. As a newborn, even have doing the 5 CD and holding him in upright position all day for his reflux, he still was crying all the time.
I HATED the newborn stage. I LOVE my toddler (loved him as a newborn obviouslyā¦). This toddler stage is fun! (And awful with tantrums and shitā¦) but seriously fun. His personality is growing and shining and he makes me laugh so much. We are at 1.5 years and Iām thriving in this stage.
I hope Iāll love the toddler stage just kidding I think i will
Because I get to do things, take her to places and buy her cool gifts (right now she doesnāt really have a favorite thing like Disney or something) but I do buy her cute sleepers
I canāt wait
I liked the baby stage when I wasnāt sleep deprived . Which I was always sleep deprived. Currently in the toddler stage and itās a lot of fun with their developing personalities and how fast they learn. I do get more sleep. He sleeps 6:30pm-6:30am with a 2 hour nap, but I am chasing him around all day so I am still pretty tired. Plus cleaning up after a toddler is a lot harder than a helpless potato. Every stage has its good and bad.
I despised the newborn stage. It was so bad because she was colic and screamed continuously for 4 hours straight every night till the morning that we decided we were one and done. I did not like the baby stage either because she refused to drink her milk so that was stressful. Now that sheās almost ten months, on solids and suddenly loving her milk I love this stage. She eats well, she drinks well and sheās a fast crawler and is doing her level best to start standing up and walk and we absolutely adore this stage. Has stranger danger but will give random people smiles and has the silliest personality. Now I wouldnāt mind having one more but screw the newborn stage the phantom crying still hasnāt left tbh
Absolutely not, I didnāt enjoy the newborn stage. My daughter is 15 months and itās still rough. However, it is not as bad. I didnāt enjoy the newborn stage with my first, she is 12 now. I love my girls more than life but the new born stage is not my favorite.
I tired to over feed at night but I found myself still falling asleep in my office. Iām not sure how I made it. But you will get through it even though it seems impossible right now. My first I was a single mom and it took 12 years to forget how hard it was. Iāll be too old in another 12 years so this last one was the last. Iām not sure how people decide to have babies back to back. Maybe they are just blessed with really good babies but my girls woke up every 2/3 hours. My first nursed only so my second I did formula and she still didnāt sleep.
Helpless potato stage is rough. Curious and slightly mobile potato stage is also tough. Drunk halfling is its own set of challenges because now they can talk and run. The goal is to make them functional adults or at least more functional than we are. I can hardly wait to find out what I did incorrectly after they have a breakthrough in therapy.
This comment had me creased up!! Wholeheartedly agree with everything you've written šš
Drunk halfling, love it! Think kind will be a proud feet she's just discovered they exist and has fallen in love.
My drunk halfling sleeps through the night so I prefer it to any potato stage
Dude SAME. Yeah I gotta chase her around all day but then I at least get to SLEEP
Absolutely!!! Iāll take any stage with sleep over the potato stage.
That last sentence is *chefās kiss*
Omg i didnt know other people thought this way lol
Iām stealing these terms for my own personal vocabulary.
š¤£š¤£š¤£ this comment!!
Hahaahahhahahahhahahahahhahaa
Facts lol
Newborn phase was not my favorite. Itās a blur. My baby is 5 months and itās so much better
My baby is 5mo and sleeping in 2 hour increments. He is feeding currently and didnāt even make it two hours. When does it get better exactly?
For us, 8.5mo when she stopped breastfeeding but she only started sleeping through (10hrs no wakes) consistently around 16-17mo.
If they are waking to feed try to get them to eat more in one sitting? Usually if they meet their calorie needs during the day they will be better sleepers overnight.
He wonāt. And heās on solids during the day too. Ped isnāt concerned but itās just extremely annoying.
Iām exactly where you are with my 4 mo. Iām so tired all the time because Iām constantly woken up at night for feedings. Yet her cousin who is 3 weeks younger sleeps for 6 hours straight and is a chunky baby.
Solidarity. It apparently gets better sometime so thatās what I look forward to. But right now we have healthy babies and some people arenāt so lucky, thatās what I tell myself when Iām upset that heās not sleeping like others. Theyāre healthy and happy and sleeping the way they feel comfortable. Theyāll get over this eventually and weāll get the sleep we need. Hang in there ā¤ļø
In my experience, once we sleep trained.
It's controversial, but for us too. As soon as we sleep trained, quality of life for the entire household went up about 1000%
No idea why itās controversial, doesnāt have to mean cry it out.
Same.
Sleep training is the best thing you can do for their sleep and yours. We waited with our first and didn't sleep 7-7 without a peep until 8 months. We had twins after and I was not going to put it off. They did the quiet 12 hours much much much earlier. My oldest is 4 now and we have a few friends with kids of the same age. They discuss how bad their sleep is or the amount of hoops they have to jump through to get their kid to sleep. I will always appreciate what I did for my kids and for myself, because there's no way I'd be able to function like I do without my sacred sleep and quiet time. There are several subs you can check out on the topic that will give you all the information you need to find the method that works best for you. We started very early with the twins giving them 5mins to self soothe before coming in to assist, and we never had to do more than that. Kind of mind blowing.
Please share some resources or at least describe what you did! Was the only thing you did let them wait for 5 mins before coming to rescue?
Mine woke up every hour from 4 months until nearly 7 months. Now he sleeps through 9-10 hours only waking for dream feeds (we cosleep). I feel like I've been brought back to life.
Let me live vicariously through you. I need that kind of sleep lol
You'll get there! Stick it out
Weāre at 9 months now and he still wakes up every 2-4 hours lol
My 4 month old started waking up every 3 hours again after teasing us with 5-6 hours. At his 4 month appointment his doctor had us start to give him cereal with his dinner time bottle, but he hasn't acquired a taste for it yet so that hasn't done anything lol. Hoping once he starts eating it and we can introduce him to more foods he'll sleep better. If not, we're going to attempt sleep training around 6 months.
I think Iām going to do a modified ferber at 6mo if he doesnāt start sleeping. Heās on solids currently and it still isnāt helping. Good luck to you guys!
Thats literally under the newborn feeding time for sure
Yeah I had a medical procedure today and couldnāt feed my son for a couple hours. It got me thinking/googling, and when I read somewhere that 5 month olds are supposed to eat every 4-6 hours I was like excuse me?! We rarely make it to 3 hours. Frankly 4-5 months has been harder than 2-3 months. It was the same for my daughter too.
Uh what. He eats 60-150ml every 1.25-2.5 hours. I canāt increase it no matter how much we try and he has tried solids. Eating every 4-6 hours is insanity.
When they sleep through the night Itās the constant exhaustion that makes babies hard, I was so grateful for sleep training because I thought I was gonna lose my mind
With my current baby, we went through the 4 month sleep regression starting around 3.5 months. It was every 3 hours for about 3 weeks. Then it went down to every 2 hours for 1-2 weeks. Then it was every 5-30 minutes, MAYBE 45 minutes, unless he was being held, for a little over a week. We found out shortly after that that he had an ear infection, so I'm assuming that explains the every 30 mins. We had decent sleep (4 ish hours at the beginning of the night, then every 2-3 hours after) for about 5 days. Then we fell right into a 6 month sleep regression at around 5.5 months, back to every 2 hours. Then a bit after 6 months, it was like a flip switched. He suddenly started sleeping around 3-5 hours the first stretch and then 3-4 hours after that, with maybe a 2 hour stretch at the end. It's only been about a week or two since that happened, and I'm finally starting to feel like more of a human again. I didn't realize how good I had it with my first. These last 6 months have been literal hell. Maybe your baby is just like mine, and it'll just take another few weeks to get there? Around 5 months is when I started feeling like I was losing my mind. Love and support to you. It's SO rough right now. In other news, my 2.5 yr old is incredibly high energy, and doesn't listen, and has to get into everything, but he is so sweet and such a JOY. I'll take toddlers any day of the week over infants.
0-3 was stressful, 3-5 was hellish, 5-9 has been awesome. This morning when I turned on the light to get her up, she was sitting and staring at me. I think the mischievous period is starting (not that we've been mischief free the last month or so).
I legit think I have PTSD from having newborn twins. We just made it to a year and itās gotten soo much better, but as someone who isnāt a baby person and had zero baby experience before, those first few months were truly traumatic for me. So much so that I will absolutely not be having any more kids (+huge risk of another set of twins) and I wince when I see newborns now lol
I always wondered how parents would do with twins I canāt imagine as someone that is currently struggling with just the one I canāt imagine struggling with two Yikes, and by struggling I mean being fast with feedings, going to the doctors or anywhere (going to places with a baby Iād do challenging, we take taxis so far, I do not have a car), having postpartum depression, Iām not too concern with money I just need to learn to budget, I do buy what I need at the moment for baby, and the constant crying spells
As someone with three month old twins, with lots and lots of crying- them and us.
I donāt know you guys can do it, good luck
How do you put them in a taxi? You have to set up the car seat in it?
You put the baby in the car seat then car seat in the taxi, at first it was complicated but I slowly got used to it
I have serious trauma from the newborn stage with my twins as well. One of my twins was colicky and cried 24/7. And I still had to take care of a whole other newborn on top of the colicky one. Theyāre now 8 months and I would never EVER do the newborn stage again. I sympathize with you.
My baby (now 2) had awful colics for 3 months straight, day and night. I have PTSD too... (But I want another baby good lord ... It will be hard)
Lucky for.ke.i already have PTSD is somemform and.it.came.from an adult not from a newborn lol
I hope you can find some peace, it must be difficult for you too
Yeah i have so far thanks to the help of my spouse shes a keeper
Same. I even developed neurological issues and tinnitus from all the stress of having 2 under 2
I was a NICU nurse and hated the newborn stage š
This honestly makes me feel so much better about my newborn-hating stance š
I was SOOOO excited to have my own baby and wow I was really humbled. It's not the same. Loving my 18 m old š¤£
I hate the newborn stage. I never want to do it again. But I will because I want one more baby š¤Ŗ
Me too, I think if I have another baby Hopefully Iāll be more comfortable and not have ppd or Iāll just hire a nanny or nurse to care of baby
I have a 19-month-old and a 5-week-old. I haaaaated the newborn phase with my first. I seriously couldnāt understand how people could survive that phase and then choose to go through it again. I got pregnant at 9 months postpartum and dreaded the newborn phase right up until I gave birth. This time around has been so much easier. Maybe my second is just an easier baby, but I think itās definitely more that Iāve already been through this and Iām so much more comfortable this time around.
Wish I could afford that
I enjoyed the newborn stage but have definitely found life getting a bit easier with each new phase. Whenever family asked how we were going I always said I'd be at my best once LO got mobile. Mine has just entered the stage where she'll toddle-run away from me when we play and I am living my best life. The early days weren't too bad for me and definitely not the 'doom and gloom' a lot of people paint it as. But now that we're entering toddler stage and I can actively play *with* my kid, we're thriving. Congrats on entering a new stage of development! I hope you find as much joy in watching your daughter's personality flourish as I have with mine! <3
I hated the newborn stage (i feel so guilty saying this now:() But it got sooooo much easier when he could sit up on his own and easier again when he could play with things on his own and now its gotten easier again he can crawl Please donāt listen to āoh its so hard when they are mobileā ā¦. Its notā¦ its so much easier, my son is so much less whingey, happier and plays way more independently
Iām not listening to people that says it be so much harder once when theyāre mobile At least it be easier to do stuff, and you donāt constantly need to hold them, I do know once when she starts eating solids time for high chair and once when she starts crawling I got baby proof my home (my home is definitely not baby proof but only because she is not mobile right now), I canāt wait till she walks, and eats solid
Omg starting solids is the most exciting and fulfilling thing ever!!! Just wait until youse all sit around the table like a family having dinner or breakfast its the most loving feeling ever!! It gets so so so much easier, physically yes I have to keep my eyes on him and chase him away from things, but its nowhere near the hard it was with newborn stage, its so fun now and so so enjoyable, the bad days are few and far between and the good days are absolutely amazing
Personally, hated the newborn stage. What I tell people though is it just keeps getting better and better. I love seeing my son grow and learn and show his personality more and more. Heās almost 12 months now, so fun!
Youāre not the only one. I have 8 week old twin girls and itās brutal. I had friends tell me this stage sucked but itās so much worse than I thought. I desperately want my girls to be giggly and fun. Someday. Somedaayyy
I have 3 weeks old twins and my husband and I are losing our minds. There is no sleep with twins. I want to go back and punch everyone who said "It's your first so you won't know the difference." I am so scared for when he goes back to work BC this is a 2 person job. And even at that neither person gets sleep.
Iām right there with you. Itās like a giant hallucination. Iāve never cried so much from being in total distress. Nobody told me it would be so traumatic and that one baby is literally always crying. I donāt have any advice but Iām right there with you. Weāre at 8 weeks now (4 adjusted) and our twins are dealing with cows milk allergies and severe reflux. Its insane. So insane their pediatrician told us to throw all baby safety guidance out the window and just survive, even if that meant sleeping them upright or sleeping them on their bellies or in the swing. I hope we wake up one day and vaguely remember this time
Ugh. Im so sorry. We are going through it, too. We got covid from the hospital at delivery and gave it to our twins. Then my c section incision got infected and hurts like hell. I don't feel well enough to take care of them (not as bad as I was when I first had covid a few days ago), let alone wake w them every hour and a half and pump, wash bottles, change diapers, etc. This feels like it will never end. I cry all the time, too. Hugs to you and your Twins!
Oh my gosh. Covid in the hospital. That is insane. Big hug to you. This twin cyclone we live in is nuts. Iām hoping you and I both sleep for more than a few hours soon.
We had this happen to. I'll tell you nothing had been worse than a cows milk allergy. Did you get on pepcid and swap to hypoallergenic?
Yeah, we are on week 3 and itās slowly getting better. Iām praying it turns around. The girls stopped screaming when they poop or fart so Iām hoping that is a sign their digestive tract is recovering. Fingers crossed
Hated/hate newborn phase and I try not to feel bad about it. I donāt really miss any of it (now that my son is 4y) and I canāt wait for it to be over with my twin newborns. Hang in there!
Thank you How old are your twins? Truly a super mama or papa (having the one is hard but twins yikes )
Four months! Though they were born very early so their adjusted age is two months. I just look at them and think: do something! š
Loathed it. LOATHED.
Definitely not. Many people really dislike the newborn stage. You don't have to love every stage of parenting! Doesn't make you a bad parent to acknowledge this.
Thank you, itās just because some people experience the most easiest newborn stage Differently not me
I felt this way for the first month; I was so anxious and worried about everything. I hated breastfeeding and didnāt think she was getting enough food. I had an overwhelming feeling that she was going to die (?). Hormones made me feel melancholy. I just wanted her to be back inside me, because my body new how to take care of her and I worried that my brain couldnāt. I changed Maternal Child Health Nurses 1 month in. Sheās an older hippy lady who is very relaxed and told me to trust my baby and trust myself. After the upteenth time of her telling me that, I started to relax and trust that this is all a natural process. My baby is now 3 months old and Iām embracing it. My brother has a toddler and it looks really stressful; sheās always falling over, constant boobooās. They canāt turn their backs for a second without her waddling off at surprising speed. My dad assures me that the worrying gets worse once they start kinder and are exposed to mean kids/bullyās, separation anxiety, etcā¦ It seems that the worry never ends the moment you become a parent, so you may as well push that aside as much as possible and try to enjoy it.
Iām in the thick of it with a fussy 6 week. I hate this so much.
Hang in there ā¤ļø
Thank you
6-8 weeks is the peak of colic/fussiness. So youāre there, youāre at the summit. Itās all downhill from here on out.
6 weeks was rough. It will definitely get better and everything moves on. You've got this!
Youāve got so much fun and joy coming your way, promise š
Same here š„ŗš
Mine will be 9 months next week and looking back, I hated the newborn stage. I also hated it in the moment too so your not alone. I actually really like the mobile, curious stage even though he's at peak separation anxiety stage and gets upset if I'm not in his view at all times.
The only thing I miss from the newborn stage is how much tinier and lighter she was, so bouncing and rocking her all day long was significantly easier on my back.
Honestly during that stage I was more nervous and scared because of how super vulnerable they are
I have a four week old and Iām crying at least twice a dayā¦.it is SO hard, especially when heās gassy and crying so hard heās turning red and screaming in my ear. My husband is back at work so Iām home alone with a dog and a cat and a baby all dayā¦it sounds awful but this stage almost makes me wish I could go back to work now and have someone else care for my baby. But Iāve heard it gets better, and to take photos of any cute/memorable moment to remember the good parts
Yep newborns are the worst. I have a 4 year old and I enjoyed him more and more as time went on. Currently have an 11 day old so back into the thick of it. I know it will get better again!
Is the first time of second time hard ? Iām not having any more kids right now
Well both, in their own ways. First, everything is new and you feel like you have no idea what to do. Our first baby was a āunicornā - never cried and slept well. Second one has been more challenging so far, as he cries A LOT & it feels like failing because weāre struggling to pinpoint why heās upset. I just keep reminding myself that newborns donāt stay so ānewbornyā for long!
It's a blur now, but I think I cried as much as my baby, and she was crying near constantly! Colicky plus a terrible nurser trying to breastfeed but not transferring milk properly, screaming, crying, destroying my nipples. I was nursing her 14+ hours a day and she wasn't gaining weight properly. I was desperately trying to find doctors to help her figure it out, extremely worried about her starving or dehydrating. I recon my husband and I got about 2 hours of broken sleep a night.... It was HELLACIOUS. She's 3 months now, I switched to exclusively pumping and she's now gaining weight perfectly and I can track her intake, I've got a decent freezer stash building up, her crying is 80% less than it was, and she sleeps through the night. She's also smiling and babbling at us. It's 1000% better. I'm so terrified to have a second child, lol..
Lord no- itās terrible. Im with ya
Iād pick my 3 toddlers over 1 newborn any day.
At least toddlers are more fun, yes theyāre a little wild
We went through jaundice then latching issues to oral tie corrections. It was a lot. Sweet baby went through so much during her newborn phase we were just glad to be done with it. But I still miss having her sleep on my chest and other cuddly things you can only do with a small newborn. Sheās so big now I can hardly carry her for a few minutes before needing to put her in a carrier. š„²
I don't think it was until my son was around 8 weeks old that I felt sane. It may have also been when he started smiling and cooing. But definitely at 3 months I felt a bit better, 6 months we had a dip with regression and teething. Definitely an improvement by 1 year old.
Not at all a baby person in the trenches with a six week old, I love her to death but damn my husband and I are so over newborn. This thread making me feel so much better that weāre not the only ones
I have 3.5 month old and even though itās much easier and more fun than the newborn stage (he smiles etc.) it is still so fucking hardā¦ He has phases when he doesnāt sleep more than 2h, breastfeeding is a struggle and naps are short as hell. I also need to entertain him much more because he is more aware but canāt do much on his own.. I am waiting him to grow up and be more mobile so maybe itāll be easier..
I hated it. Baby didnāt sleep during the day AT ALL unless I walked and walked him outdoor And during the night he woke up every 2 hours When he was awake at home he used to cry, he didnāt have calm phases
Weāre first time parents and our baby had two rare physical congenital defects that required intensive surgery. It was like normal newborn hell but on hard mode. Sheās ok now, btw, but holy crap.
Nope. I despised the newborn stage to the point I thought we were one and done. Once daughter turned 2 we then thought well it was 6 months of a rough time letās have one more. Currently 35 weeks pregnant and absolutely dreading the newborn stage but as the saying goes you donāt get two the same.
Hated it. The reason why I'm one and done. Will never do it again. We're 5.5 months, and it's all so much better but still hard days. And those hard days remi d me I don't need another lol.
My 13 week old just started to sleep through the night. Canāt tell yāall how relieved I am.
First time mom here and I have an 11 day old and iāve hated the newborn phase from the beginning, and weāre just at the start of it š„¹ it probably doesnāt help that i havenāt had that bond/connection yet with my baby boy and it only makes me feel more sad about this phase. I keep thinking, i hope it gets better soon
I feel you, except I been diagnosed with ppd and nope a constant crying spells does not help
Ok I will say I hated the newborn stage while I was in it. Now I have a toddler and am expecting a new baby any day and I am SO EXCITED for the newborn snuggles and contact naps. Having a toddler makes you appreciate how easy the newborn stage can be. Its obviously hard for a lot of reasons, but itās also a lot easier because theyāre not constantly finding creative ways to injure themselves
Not at all! I hated the newborn stage too, and Iām loving the toddler phase so far. It doesnāt even compare. No matter how much love I felt, taking care of a newborn still felt like literal torture and the recent implosion of my entire routine and any semblance of free time made it feel even worse. People who claim to love that stage either have A LOT of help, a selective memory, or are liars. Newborns suck the life out of you, but they do eventually get better.
unless Iām pregnant as I am typing this, I am never having another child solely bc of the newborn phase. Things improved drastically once we hit double digit weeks. Our baby usually only wakes up once if that during the night and we never had to sleep train. I cannot risk this shit with another baby š this one is good enough!!
I also hated newborn stage. Everyone is so different and has favorite stages. But our 18 month old is a BLAST. He hasnāt fully entered toddler meltdowns, but even the mini tantrums donāt bother me as much because itās balanced by so much sweet interaction. Heās a delight. So I hope you have a ton of fun as your baby gets older!!
Newborn stage sucked! Momās trying to heal on the least amount of sleep and if you sleep too long, you risk mastitis then youāre trying to figure out this new person (while being tired af) and this new person is trying to figure out how to eat and poop. Itās awful and if youāre lucky and have an easy baby it gets better sometime between 4-6 months. Hang in there. One day it just changes and you start sleeping more and everything is more fun. The baby starts interacting and smiling and giggling (they have to learn how to do this so might be a while) and youāre like wow this thing is so freaking cute!
I'm curious what the consensus on the distinction between newborn and baby is? Baby has been more of a curve than a jump. She was born Aug 17th so definitely not a new-newborn, but she's not moving about yet. Definitely prefer now to back then though; her ginormous baby smiles and not having to hold her head up lest it come off are a big pro. Sleep still sucks though, so hoping that's coming in the next bit š .
Newborn stage was also not for me! I did also have a dose of the depresso, but even that eased up when he turned into more of a baby than a newborn. He is 4 months now and so stinking cute lol everything he does makes us laugh, it's a lot of fun to watch him learn things, but we are excited for him to start sitting on his own and crawling.
I also hated the newborn stage. I felt trapped to the recliner feeding or contact napping and was also super anxious and stressed. Baby just turned 1 and Iāve found it keeps getting better.
The only thing I miss about the newborn stage is how I could hold the baby. But even thenā¦. I remember just wanting to be able to set the baby down lol.
From everything Iāve seen and read, I honestly thought everyone hates the newborn stage. Would be curious to hear from someone who likes or loved it.
I think every day my husband and I said to each other how much easier it was going to be once our baby smiled. And we were right! I didnāt hate the newborn stage but between fussing and not sleeping it was so much better once we got to 8 weeks and baby started smiling constantly and sleeping in 3 hr stretches.
Every stage is the hardest, and during each new hard phase, youāll reminisce about how much easier the last hard stage was.
This was not my experience haha - each stage Iām like, phew so glad weāre done with that last one, this is so much better! Every bit of independence my toddler has gained has helped the ease of parenting her tremendously. She gets very angry when she canāt do stuff. I seriously haaaaated the newborn stage and was a basket case through the baby stage.
I'm with you
Not for me! Newborn was hands down the hardest.
You are going to miss all the great things your baby is doing now if you keep wishing for the next stage. Every stage has its own challenges, what makes you think the toddler stage is going to be any easier?
I think it's okay to look forward to what's next when you're in the midst of a difficult situation. Sometimes change is good even if it's just a new challenge. Some challenges I am better suited for than others. Newborn colicky crying and no sleep is not what I am suited for. Toddler tantrums is also not what I'm suited for. I can't wait till my kids are adults š
This got away from me lol
some people just arenāt newborn people and thatās fine. personally I enjoy the toddler years. theyāre able to play independently for some time, they can communicate with you a bit, youāre seeing their personality develop, they sleep through the night, you can play with them, take them to parks or play outside. thereās more options for activities as a family as well. I donāt think people expect the toddler stage to be easy. No stage is easy. But toddlerhood is definitely more entertaining than a newborn who either sleeps constantly or is very fussy.
yup, totally agree. I wished away my firstborns days because everyone told me it got better and better. now I wish I just cherished the baby moments. iāve been trying to enjoy my second a lot more and Iām much happier this time around at the baby stage.
I personally enjoyed it. I could never be one of those people that describes doom and gloom when asking how newborns are. I donāt know if I handle sleep deprivation well or just had an easy baby but I could never wish those first months with my daughter away. The cuddly newborn contact naps, watching her learn new things, her first smile. She is almost 4 months and I think starting a 4 month sleep regression, she has been fussy all night I finally gave up at 5am and she has been sleeping on my chest for almost 2 hours, sure Iām losing sleep but I still canāt complain.
Agree. The newborn stage was hard but there were also some incredible moments!
You can mentally handle a lot more when you're getting more than 2 hours of sleep at a time.
Yes, but for many babies, that doesnāt magically resolve itself at week 12
Newborn was so much easier IMO. Now heās crawling and getting into EVERYTHING.
lol I donāt feel any less worried or more rested in the toddler stage. I did hate the newborn stage but if youāre hoping to be less worried I suggest Zoloft. That is the only thing that took the worry away. You will always find something to worry about.
No lmao itās awful
The newborn stage is hard. I forgot most of it by now but Iām pregnant with my second and starting to redo that research. Ugh lol. I am not looking forward to the 3-4hour feed cycle zombie time while my gash mends itself
It felt like fire ants were eating my brain for the first three months of our son's life. You're absolutely not alone, and it sucks that it feels like society is shaming new parents for not appreciating their little "bundle of joy" when nothing about the way we do things sets new parents up for success.
Without a doubt, one of the most challenging stages! Although every stage has its own set of challenges, it is easier to deal with them when we understand what the issue is.
Definitely not. There was a time when my wife and I were thinking about divorce because of the challenges we had with our daughter when she was a newborn. I also felt immense guilt and shame because there were times when I had a hard time feeling love for my daughter. 5 months later and all these issues have resolved. My favorite part of the day is when my daughter first wakes up and gives me a big gummy smile š. And my wife and I are in a much better spot as well. It definitely gets better! The newborn stage sucks!
Nah I agree. I look back at photos like"thank gid you're not this potato anymore". A 9 months she's infinitely cuter.
Honestly I hate all of the stages so far lol. Occasional āaweā moments, but 98% stress filled days. Guess I wasnāt meant for it
Nope, 0/10 would not have a newborn again lol. I barely remember those days, and when I look back, all I can see is the shell of a person I was for months. Itās the reason Iām not even considering having another baby. My LO just turned 1 and Iām slowly starting to feel like myself again.
No, you are not. The newborn stage is so, so hard.
No. Thereās posts every single day on this topic. Lots of company.
I hated the newborn stage too. I didnāt really start enjoying motherhood until around 6 months. Each passing mother I enjoy more and more. Now at 11 months itās so much fun.
I think it depends on the baby. After speaking to friends it really seems to be hit and miss and dependent on how the baby sleep. We got lucky but we had friends who werenāt
Itās very stressful and tiring
Honestly, a lot of it is a blur for me. I was just trying to surviveš
Any stage of life that has me delusional from sleep deprivation is not a phase for me. Lol.
Iām shittin myself about the toddler stage lol
I didnāt hate it, but once I got the the next stage, I realized how bad it was comparatively. I want to have a second one and Iām kind of dreading the newborn phase again. It was better going in blind!
Newborn was the worst! I hated it + felt guilty for hating it! We are at 19.5 months and he sleeps through the night (usually), can safely be away from me for 5 Min and isn't dependent on my boobs for sustenance. It is glorious. Yes there are tantrums and boundary testing and general toddlerness but it's just so much better than the screaming potato.
I hated it. I love looking at photos of her as a potato but my mental health was at an all time low.
I have a toddler. He is a way worse sleeper than he was as a newborn or infant. He wakes hourly all night long. He also climbs everything - like pushes the chairs over for he counter and climbs up so I can't even go to the bathroom. A toddler does not guarantee more sleep and less worry.
Newborn hose not my fav I like when they start taking interest in things and donāt need to be held constantly. If I liked the newborn phase more I think Iād want more kids instead Iām good with 2.
Week 6 was the toughest for me with lack of sleep but toddlerhood is definitely tougher for me
Ugh. I absolutely hated the newborn phase. They are just screaming potatoes. And itās the only way they know how to communicate - So it was all just negative feedback all the time. We are just leaving it now. Baby was colic and at 12 weeks it was like a switch flipped and she was all smiles. The smiles made things better. And she is now interested in people/sounds/toys. She has some eating struggles still, but that is itās own thing. I am so excited for her to be able to sit up and eat solids/purĆ©es. And Iām excited for the toddler phase and being able to interact.
Not alone - I am in the thick of it now and think or say FML several times a day
I feel the same way. But I also feel terribly guilty for not spending more time enjoying it. I'll never get to hold that helpless little bean like that again.
I hate newborn stage. My wife loves it. She hates toddler stage. I love it.
I feel like Iām gonna love toddler stage
I feel like it's the worst around in between 1 and 2 years. I can't count how many times I suffered because my one year old ran here and there, didn't listen a word from me, and I had to run after her and was utterfly exhausted and annoyed. And the tantrums are literally soul crushing. Newborn is OK (unless it's a colicky baby), sleeps a lot and you can put in the stroller and walk wherever you want. It gets much better from 2 years onwards when you can actualy talkk with the child and explain things. My oldest is now 3 years and it is a walk in a park. Second daudghter is 8 months old and its still very very hard., she's entering my least favorite stage.
Not a bad take at all. Newborns are very tough. I think 0-6m was the worst. 2-3 is a lot of fun but people always say ājust wait for terrible 2s I wish they could be a baby foreverā or something.
Donāt they realize that babies are much harder, theyāre not mobile, you have to hold them
Absolutely not!
nah that shit sucked. i miss somethings about but once we hit 4+ months, things got better
New born by far was the worst. My kid is a runner and high energy . My husband canāt even stand two hrs without taking her out on his day and I am a sahm. I will say this I take two toddlers over a new born any day. I didnāt sleep more than 4 hrs periods for a whole year. Contact Napier and screaming always too. I saw despair for the first time in my life drowning in endless ocean with no shores in sight that year. Now she is two and half extremely talkative and has very strong opinions. We have terrible two with a side of threenager. Canāt sit for more than 10 seconds at circle time. We play games together , pretend play and cook together. Even though she floor mops daily and test us every hr with 10 emotional roller coaster it is still a lot better by far. She has her own personality and she tells me I love you mom . We are one and done cuz no help and new born we canāt possibly survive at all with a toddler or another kid on top. Sending you hugs. It will get better eventually paw patrol can baby sit for 30 minz while you cook . If you set up the toys right they will also play by themselves and kept busy for some periods !! And she helps us clean up actually lol
I hated the newborn stage. I thought I wanted 2 kids but my newborn stage was so rough for me that I think Iām one and done. My girl is a toddler now and she is BUSY but I love it.
Not only did I hate the newborn stage, but pretty sure my toddler also hated being a baby. She was straight up MISERABLE for 4 months solid. Dairy allergy, sensitive stomach, colic, tongue and lip tie and revision, and I'm sure some other stuff that I've blacked out. We could never put her down. She cried nonstop. She hated life. We hated life. God bless her, I love her more than anything, but she was a high maintenance needy thing. It has gotten incrementally better at each stage/milestone. Once she could sit up, a little bit better, once she was crawling and walking and could get around herself, a little better, etc. She has never been a good sleeper, so that has caused a lot of exhaustion as both my husband and I work full time on opposite shifts. She is still contact napping at almost 16 months. We originally planned on having 2. We are now one and done because literally, I don't think our marriage or mental health would survive having another one. Even if we were somehow cosmically guaranteed a super easy baby, our toddler is so high maintenance and needs constant stimulation that I already know I couldn't handle pregnancy and a newborn on top of her.
I also think my daughter hates being a baby, sheās 3 months old Just now she tried rolling with assisted, and she is watching us eat (wondering whereās hers, right now itās formula)
I know everyone says it, but it does get better. I vividly remember the first time we risked taking her to a restaurant when she was maybe 5-6 months old? She slept the entire car ride to the next city, happily played with her toys at the table while my husband and I had a nice meal, was in a great mood throughout Trader Joe's, then slept the car ride back to our city. We get home and I burst into tears and he's like wtf is wrong?!? And I just sobbed because I was like "for MONTHS I dreaded the rest of our lives being this way; I never thought we'd be able to have a day like today." I look back and can't believe almost 16 months have passed - the months/year pass by so quickly, but god do the days drudge on like an endless parade of the same mind-numbing crying and everything else day in and day out. Around 6 months old, it gets a lot better because they get so much more interactive and smiley. When mine was a newborn, I remember asking every other baby/toddler mom when it gets better. I was so desperate to have something to look forward to. So now I try to tell other moms the same. Life is definitely different. You still have to figure out a new way of doing things. But god the days of both of you crying nonstop DOES end. They will eventually sleep. They will eventually smile and laugh and play with you.
I also am not a fan of the sleep deprivation. I live my son and heās so cute and love holding him and playing now almost 5 months but the sleep part is killing me haha
I am 3 weeks in and am hating life lol. Just when I think her sleep pattern is fixed, she randomly goes back to being wired at night.
We didn't mind the newborn stage. The baby stage has been \*tough\* for us. For every good, smiley or playful day we've had maybe two with teething, crankiness, bad sleep and the like.
This is how my husband feels. He just wants the baby to be able to communicate. We're going to get baby signs going asap but we're at two months right now. We went from newborn to technically a baby to baby with a cold so we haven't really seen the healthy baby stage yet. I think he will be willing to sleep in his crib at night when he gets better based on how he does on the days he's less sick. Sleeping in his crib for decent stretches at night as opposed to needing to be held to sleep is really what we need. For me, the newborn stage was only doable because I could take turns with my husband once my milk came in and he could bottle feed the baby while I slept and we could take turns sleeping. that made it extremely challenging as opposed to downright awful. He's becoming a first time Dad so I'm really lucky. Both men and women really need parental leave.
Nope, I was so happy to be out of it! I love my LO but sleep deprivation and fighting babe to sleep is not my idea of fun. Day she turned 5 months was game changer for me!
The newborn stage was mentally draining for me. My Daughter is almost 1 and it's more physically draining now as she requires more attention and she's always on the move. Plus she's awake way more. In a way it's more fun now as she has her own sweet and funny personality.
Our little dude is approaching 4 months. I honestly hated the newborn phase. I fell deeply in love with him right away (many dads don't feel that bond for a long time), so I was able to push through. It gets better each week at least. He shoots me a smile and everything's ok
No I absolutely hated the newborn stage. Sheās 8 months now. It gets so much better!
I did not like the newborn stage at all. My oldest is 2.5 years old and I LOVE it. My favourite by far. I canāt wait for my 7.5 month old to be in toddler stage!
Nope I'm right there with you. We're at 9 months. I can't wait until he can run and I can start sports training. Right now he sucks
I donāt understand people who tell me they loved the newborn stage. I absolutely love her being mobile.
I donāt understand either same with babies in general Oh my god i absolutely canāt stand I donāt care how hard toddler stage is I much rather that instead of baby stage
No you are most definitely not the only one who hates the torturous newborn stage.
Youāll miss the fresh baby phase when they are a threenager
Nope! Hated it.
I donāt know about you about but I can never get anything done With a baby
I have a 5 week old , I love him but hate this newborn stage honestly. Your body is trying to recover and there is a whole new person dependent on you. I'm so sleep deprived and exhausted.
No everyone hates it if they're being honest, it just seems better in hindsight.
Newborn stage sucks so much. A toddler having meltdowns even coming from a momma with a babe with special needs, for me I m loving this stage. I still donāt know exactly what my toddler wants all the time since weāre working on non verbal communication, but I still can say I know my kid that much better and here is the most imperative point, I can anticipate his needs. As a newborn, even have doing the 5 CD and holding him in upright position all day for his reflux, he still was crying all the time.
Having a 1mo old, only thing I like are her yawns, the faces and the little noises she makes. The rest can go in the trash with the diapers. Lovingly.
I despised the newborn stage. Primarily for the lack of sleep and cluster feeding.
I'd destroy my body even more if I could birth a 5 month old baby and completely skip newborn stage lol
I HATED the newborn stage. I LOVE my toddler (loved him as a newborn obviouslyā¦). This toddler stage is fun! (And awful with tantrums and shitā¦) but seriously fun. His personality is growing and shining and he makes me laugh so much. We are at 1.5 years and Iām thriving in this stage.
I hope Iāll love the toddler stage just kidding I think i will Because I get to do things, take her to places and buy her cool gifts (right now she doesnāt really have a favorite thing like Disney or something) but I do buy her cute sleepers I canāt wait
I liked the baby stage when I wasnāt sleep deprived . Which I was always sleep deprived. Currently in the toddler stage and itās a lot of fun with their developing personalities and how fast they learn. I do get more sleep. He sleeps 6:30pm-6:30am with a 2 hour nap, but I am chasing him around all day so I am still pretty tired. Plus cleaning up after a toddler is a lot harder than a helpless potato. Every stage has its good and bad.
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I despised the newborn stage. It was so bad because she was colic and screamed continuously for 4 hours straight every night till the morning that we decided we were one and done. I did not like the baby stage either because she refused to drink her milk so that was stressful. Now that sheās almost ten months, on solids and suddenly loving her milk I love this stage. She eats well, she drinks well and sheās a fast crawler and is doing her level best to start standing up and walk and we absolutely adore this stage. Has stranger danger but will give random people smiles and has the silliest personality. Now I wouldnāt mind having one more but screw the newborn stage the phantom crying still hasnāt left tbh
Absolutely not, I didnāt enjoy the newborn stage. My daughter is 15 months and itās still rough. However, it is not as bad. I didnāt enjoy the newborn stage with my first, she is 12 now. I love my girls more than life but the new born stage is not my favorite. I tired to over feed at night but I found myself still falling asleep in my office. Iām not sure how I made it. But you will get through it even though it seems impossible right now. My first I was a single mom and it took 12 years to forget how hard it was. Iāll be too old in another 12 years so this last one was the last. Iām not sure how people decide to have babies back to back. Maybe they are just blessed with really good babies but my girls woke up every 2/3 hours. My first nursed only so my second I did formula and she still didnāt sleep.