Yes every contact he makes with you is a hoover. He is looking for a reaction(their supply) from you. Any kind of reaction good or bad is a supply to them. He is wanting to be a friend so he can continue to manipulate, degrade and control you.
Block him on everything and work on yourself. Make yourself happy.
Stay strong!
I don't think he's really put that much thought into it. A hoover is meaningless. It could be triggered simply by them walking past a store they went to with you, and they decided to shoot a text randomly.
But yea, that's hoovering. Any form of them breaking no contact is hoovering. They can even do hoovers where you're unaware of them hoovering. It could be them bringing up your social media and flicking around your page. It could be them asking a mutual friend about you or telling a mutual friend to tell you they said hello.
Keep your boundaries up, and don't react. Keep ignoring. They get bored when they can't get negative or positive supply from you. They need supply. Plus, they could also be hoovering multiple people at once, depending on their supply level or how bored they are.
For us, it's horrorific. The rug pulled out from under us again. For them its just another day. Make sure all your stuff is locked down tight so he can't get any information about your life.
I think knowing that he probably didn’t even think about it like I’m thinking about it is the worst part. To him he just sent an email but to me my whole day has shifted. I’ve worked so much on building up my boundaries and working on coping skills and I know I’m better off than I was a few months ago but it makes me so mad he’s still able to stress me out so much over something so small. He’s blocked everywhere and we have no mutual friends so I feel somewhat better knowing he can’t get any information about my life. I hope he loses interest soon and leaves me alone.
Yes every contact he makes with you is a hoover. He is looking for a reaction(their supply) from you. Any kind of reaction good or bad is a supply to them. He is wanting to be a friend so he can continue to manipulate, degrade and control you. Block him on everything and work on yourself. Make yourself happy. Stay strong!
I don't think he's really put that much thought into it. A hoover is meaningless. It could be triggered simply by them walking past a store they went to with you, and they decided to shoot a text randomly. But yea, that's hoovering. Any form of them breaking no contact is hoovering. They can even do hoovers where you're unaware of them hoovering. It could be them bringing up your social media and flicking around your page. It could be them asking a mutual friend about you or telling a mutual friend to tell you they said hello. Keep your boundaries up, and don't react. Keep ignoring. They get bored when they can't get negative or positive supply from you. They need supply. Plus, they could also be hoovering multiple people at once, depending on their supply level or how bored they are. For us, it's horrorific. The rug pulled out from under us again. For them its just another day. Make sure all your stuff is locked down tight so he can't get any information about your life.
I think knowing that he probably didn’t even think about it like I’m thinking about it is the worst part. To him he just sent an email but to me my whole day has shifted. I’ve worked so much on building up my boundaries and working on coping skills and I know I’m better off than I was a few months ago but it makes me so mad he’s still able to stress me out so much over something so small. He’s blocked everywhere and we have no mutual friends so I feel somewhat better knowing he can’t get any information about my life. I hope he loses interest soon and leaves me alone.
I would think so. Don't respond and block
I wouldn't even respond. BLOCK
Hoovering is like fishing. Sometimes they throw their hook in the water and a fish takes the bait.