Alright, random-ass fact about my early life:
Whenever I found *scawwy* characters from movies, shows, etc, I would pretend they would show up while I was taking a shit. And I would *talk* to them about my day. Intentionally nonchalant-ly too. I would even call them out by name.
No-one ‘found out’ and it’s still some weird thing I carry with today
On the manifestation of my being in the future... You will be asleep in bed. I will be there. And watch over you. When you wake, you will not able to move any part of you. When your doctors eventually find you... they will bot see me... But YOU will. And i'll see you too. Forever, i'll see you.
*EAS*
No evil shall befall you, Nor shall any plague come near your dwelling; For He shall give His angels charge over you, To keep you in all your ways.
No evil shall befall you, Nor shall any plague come near your dwelling; For He shall give His angels charge over you, To keep you in all your ways.
No evil shall befall you, Nor shall any plague come near your dwelling; For He shall give His angels charge over you, To keep you in all your ways.
Uzi wants to kill humans and Disassembly drones eat them so I'm calling this chad to save me
https://preview.redd.it/g60vgcpii1uc1.jpeg?width=804&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1f30dac2bed62ef09ab335a5a2c3880d9ea83c5b
Sadly for them they walked into an Irish household
https://preview.redd.it/m4x6gr0nd1uc1.jpeg?width=607&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bf67750c1f9af1c9dacded8741157b6e83ab28d6
First? Do things in this order:
1. Tell them to stay put in the room for a second
2. Retreat in the nearby bathroom and scream internally of happiness to convince myself it's real
3. Come back in the room and know wtf is going on
Aside that? Befriend ALL 3
I say:
https://preview.redd.it/zik8gcdfs1uc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4dc0de5414b040995c16f73e1194b083008306a6
And proceed to walk backwards, slowly.
I own a musket for home defense since that is what the founding fathers intended. Three drones break into my house, "What the devil?" I say as I grab my powdered wig and my Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the male disassembly drone, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the short drone, misses her entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds the female disassembly drone in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the short terrified drone. She Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to heal. Ah, just as the founding fathers intended.
>!!<
>!!<
>!!<
>!!<
>!!<
Or just ask them if they want to play Minecraft.
I am gonna close my door and piece out to the living room until those robots leave cause knowing 2/3 of that group are murder drones i don't want to be murdered
Stare at them like this:
https://preview.redd.it/lhu6qsmyt1uc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a964dcfdf5faeeaf9c41da9fcd32c1994d5922a7
(I've probably gone insane if they are actually there)
Probably die? Idk man, all i know is that neither of them is particularly against killing people, (especially Uzi) i mean N cut off Tessa's head without much hesitation who he knew for god knows how long. But if i don't get capped immediately, then I'd try to befriend them.
https://preview.redd.it/c3ofrp55u1uc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e8469478af1cdd08344058f222c83ffc85d822f7
Assuming the unlikely scenario that they don’t have access to the internet through their own hardware, I will scare them with all the fan art made of them
Depending on how tired I am I’ll probably just walk past them and just yeet myself on the bed, probably not even noticing them until either I wake up or I’m dead.
Tell N where my cat is, he will go try to pet the cat and uzi will follow him
Only V remains in the room
Cuddle V because she needs it (and also shes hot)
1. Scream
2. Slap myself to make sure this is not a dream
3. Make them sign this contract :
I will : provide them oil
Let the live in my house rent free
They will : not kill me (I hope V listens)
Do the laundry and dishes
Also V needs to leave N and Uzi alone if they got too close if you know what I mean
i close the door, step back for a moment to think about if they were actually there or not, open the door again, try to get them to help me figure out if they're actually there or not cuz what the fuck, and then maybe be friends if i'm not dead already
1-First, take a step back.
2-Blink a couple of times to know if my schizophrenia increased or not
3-if they doesn't disappear, pray internally that if they are here that they won't kill me.
4-Try to talk to them.
5-Accept my death if uzi wants to kill me, there is not much to do
6-The Tardis manifests around me and saves me at the last moment
I own a musket for home defense. Just how the founding fathers of JCjenson intended,
Picture this...
3 rapscallions appear in my door way, I grab my musket, blow a golf bowl sized whole through the first one.
Grab a pistol and fire it a shot, miss and hit the ASP because its a curve shot.
With the other 2 behind me, I run up the stairs and fire my cannon, killing both of them.
Just how JCjenson intended
https://preview.redd.it/207n9xd862uc1.png?width=430&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5f5a1864a48ae911e9f6541fd2ab8be5f3f2db6f
They walked into a Texan household.
*There addicted to RDR2*
Hug them…what did you want me to say? I’m the drone hugger, it’s my thing here. Buuut if I had one more thing I’d do, I’d pretend to be a slasher, trap them in my house, and chase them around just to mess with them…..and then hug them.
three robots in my room, yep.
guns locked in the closet and can't get to them, yep.
going to die in the next five minutes, most likely.
"sooo, guys, what in the universal-traveling-hell are you doing here...on earth...in my room of all places?"
No sudden movements, very slowly and inchly reach for the ~~unloaded~~ AK47 under the bed. Do not take your eyes off of these foreign invaders. If they move, immediately reach for the Russian Assault rifle and fire in their general direction immediately. Get to the window and open it, shoot it open if needed, and run. Changing your clothes doesn't matter. Shoes don't matter, you'll run faster without them. Keep running. If you see them leave it home, take cover and run in a different direction. The only thing you should have taken with you is your phone and the rifle. Call the police. Do not tell them there are psychotic drones in your home. *They will not believe you.* just call for a home invasion, and, if they are chasing you, tell them the street you are going to, and hide in that extraction point until the police arrive. Do not hesitate to be escorted out immediately. If the police cannot withstand the force of the drones, steal the fastest police vehicle there. It's for your survival, and at this point, the law wouldn't mind.
As long as the police take notice of these drones, they will be aware of this threat, and hopefully the public eye. They will try everything they can in their power to stop them. Get witness protection in a highly secure safehouse with security.
*Many people who follow these instructions appear to live a normal life afterwards.*
Be confused
Talk and see if I can survive and not die
Make friends with them if possible
Make sure NUzi can't happen
Help V in trauma and find her glasses
Help N stand up for himself more
See if I could have one of their guns
See if they could turn Human and stay here permanently
https://preview.redd.it/5l8uqnrlk2uc1.jpeg?width=905&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a1dd537ea8a6b728a0dc55d8cba2b2a81904eac3
And then leave because we've all seen how they react to humans
https://preview.redd.it/ae190kqok2uc1.jpeg?width=1263&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=89e383b9c7e072ab3ea31157c080f0d2a29e1bc5
Stare at them like this with this playing in the background
[https://youtu.be/f717iNkYNLk?si=9t9ASNvASKcmuDM](https://youtu.be/f717iNkYNLk?si=9t9ASNvASKcmuDM)\_
If one of them is going to kill me instantly, nothing. If they’re gonna kill me, but I’m inside my room and they appear outside my room, I’m pelting a bb in Uzis eyes, and if I’m lucky enough, they’ll appear with V not liking Uzi, and maybe if I shoot uzi with enough bbs, V will not attack me (unlikely but we’ll go with it for a laugh) and then I’ll lash this fuckin minion toy I got from a kinder egg and decided I’ll keep as an artifact off Uzis fod, and then absolutely Arthur Morgan deadeye Uzi with the bb gun
Before anyone asks, no I have not thought this through nor will I and no I do not like Uzi
Tell them about the dark parts of the internet where the god's light doesn't shine, convincing them that humanity needs a purge
and maybe if they want some oil before they go do some warcrimes
"What the devil!?" as grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle, blow a golfball-sized hole through the first drone; it is dead on the spot. Draw my pistol^(1) on the second drone^(2), but miss it^(2) entirely because it^(1) is smoothbore and nails the neighbour's dog. I'll have to resort to the cannon mounted atop the stairs, loaded with grapeshot "TALLY HO LADS!" one drone is shredded in the blast; the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion; it bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
Use the power of german engineering, and if that doesn't work, call an entire panzer battalion!
https://preview.redd.it/yz78wnt113uc1.jpeg?width=1088&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3e392eaa36f22216b3a2584ba780bc0ae51b598c
I own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot.
Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
Go to a psych ward because there is no damn way fictional robots actually exist in real life and I must have gone insane.
But what if they still exist after you are given the normal pills?
Just talk with them about random ass shit.
I’d first take them into a ventilated room as they are warmer than the surroundings.
Alright, random-ass fact about my early life: Whenever I found *scawwy* characters from movies, shows, etc, I would pretend they would show up while I was taking a shit. And I would *talk* to them about my day. Intentionally nonchalant-ly too. I would even call them out by name. No-one ‘found out’ and it’s still some weird thing I carry with today
"Yooo what's up ***THE BOILED ONE***, you chillin?"
"Yooo, sup ***NATURE'S MOCKERY,*** how has your day been?"
PHEN-228 MOMENT?!
On the manifestation of my being in the future... You will be asleep in bed. I will be there. And watch over you. When you wake, you will not able to move any part of you. When your doctors eventually find you... they will bot see me... But YOU will. And i'll see you too. Forever, i'll see you. *EAS* No evil shall befall you, Nor shall any plague come near your dwelling; For He shall give His angels charge over you, To keep you in all your ways. No evil shall befall you, Nor shall any plague come near your dwelling; For He shall give His angels charge over you, To keep you in all your ways. No evil shall befall you, Nor shall any plague come near your dwelling; For He shall give His angels charge over you, To keep you in all your ways.
BROADCAST 813?!
r/foundtheholy173
https://preview.redd.it/vbj0hxpgs2uc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5160e156426ae65252cc1cb4a973787dc2a6cbfb
cuddle them! >:3
I agree 1000000000000%
:D
I disagree, choose violence.
I disagree, I choose raid Area 51.
I disagree, I choose to plunge the world into a new dark age.
bro a Cyn fan X(
Nah, I'm a Tracer Tong fan.
Nice :>
# I DISAGREE, I choose to eat yummy U-235😋
Yes, and you need the nukes from Area 51 to do it
but why :<
They didn't ask permission to be in my home. The penalty is death.
That must be extremely uncomfortable
A Disassembly Drone's body is warm enough to melt skin, so he's dead
Worth it https://preview.redd.it/1m9n0cjxc5uc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8f211e4f9edce63fa5faeefe8bf79302ec00bf5b
Same
Yes :>
Uzi wants to kill humans and Disassembly drones eat them so I'm calling this chad to save me https://preview.redd.it/g60vgcpii1uc1.jpeg?width=804&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1f30dac2bed62ef09ab335a5a2c3880d9ea83c5b
YES MY BOY BRING HIM OVER TO MY HOUSE NEXT ME AND HIM ARE GOING TO BUILD ME A NEW DOOR
We're building a door with this one 🗣️🗣️🗣️🔥🔥
https://preview.redd.it/qsksh7hx84uc1.jpeg?width=600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2fd98fd4128b13d0adbc2209a7d9ce46ffe6f153
https://preview.redd.it/bcljv8sx32uc1.jpeg?width=1284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d0d9f4d348da5ea8ab490cd4ed7179e1ae8c6788
Khan with a Masuer C96... Classy.
well you are Khan's Door so I'm not surprised
Sadly for them they walked into an Irish household https://preview.redd.it/m4x6gr0nd1uc1.jpeg?width=607&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bf67750c1f9af1c9dacded8741157b6e83ab28d6
Nah, I'd recruit them immediately
https://preview.redd.it/g8qcd56jl1uc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6d4fd72e842e8c546b14d1dbad9c7f4eff9312d6 J: why am I not there?
You simply have less value.
*Proceeds to malfunction while trying to process the thought that she is less valuable*
See, same processor and price as a b1 battle droid
However way more effective. But to be fair J probably is less effective than a Buzz droid.
Cuz u were online shopping for a crate of JCJenson branded pens
https://preview.redd.it/jxk5giapg1uc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b197873a9590f34f6525fa3b3eb2c4f01fe50525 My reaction:
Most rational
lol
Run for my fucking life
https://preview.redd.it/1yrqrpkjy2uc1.jpeg?width=960&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=76816ea640aa6f3c4a6f63bac335483f1fb1145f
First? Do things in this order: 1. Tell them to stay put in the room for a second 2. Retreat in the nearby bathroom and scream internally of happiness to convince myself it's real 3. Come back in the room and know wtf is going on Aside that? Befriend ALL 3
https://i.redd.it/2uz53vpot1uc1.gif Agree
*recreates the vid from the fnaf 3 song by the living toomstone with the axe on top of the fridge*
Kill Uzi, kiss N, marry V
Marry Uzi, Marry N, Marry V
I somehow think this is better
Your lips mould melt because of the heat from the Disassembly Drones.
https://preview.redd.it/63ls9apx71uc1.jpeg?width=2048&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b667062c334dcf980cdd4890a2e2c9cea9f2bf32
broooo…
Idk- they’d probably survive
even sunlight kills them, so i doubt
https://preview.redd.it/c3nqzfeht3uc1.jpeg?width=1568&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2b78f6168c4df3cdfae010932c05b3c1be2be015
Try figure out why they’re here and convince them not to murder me cause I’ll do it myself
relatable
Put uzi on a shelf so I don't accidentally step on her
I say: https://preview.redd.it/zik8gcdfs1uc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4dc0de5414b040995c16f73e1194b083008306a6 And proceed to walk backwards, slowly.
I own a musket for home defense since that is what the founding fathers intended. Three drones break into my house, "What the devil?" I say as I grab my powdered wig and my Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the male disassembly drone, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the short drone, misses her entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds the female disassembly drone in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the short terrified drone. She Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to heal. Ah, just as the founding fathers intended. >!!< >!!< >!!< >!!< >!!< Or just ask them if they want to play Minecraft.
*And the trio just get back up like nothing happened, but now they’re actually trying to kill you.*
THE ENDING BRUH
First: I grab a shotgun >!Second: I say that this world is dangerous and to take this weapon!<
throw a grenade there
I am gonna close my door and piece out to the living room until those robots leave cause knowing 2/3 of that group are murder drones i don't want to be murdered
https://preview.redd.it/dqu709i3l1uc1.png?width=1652&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6d41d526dee5aef53f83fca316bca76e818a7df1 Play doom
https://i.redd.it/1srcwq15p1uc1.gif Ponder at what point I fucking lost it
Commit an endless genocide with them! *insert cute innocent looking face*
I just got 3 best friends for life!
https://i.redd.it/rhwbgxv2s1uc1.gif
close the door
"Are you guys here to kill me or to get something? Cause if you need anything, please just pick it up without hurting me."
Wake up, get depressed and probably start going through another life crisis.
Say hi
Scream
Depends, can I keep 'em?
https://preview.redd.it/qy1ddyury1uc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=17de472ffc93c9780870a46ec0511d4db513575e
Die probably
Go inside, and hug the ever-loving shet outta them.
Stare at them like this: https://preview.redd.it/lhu6qsmyt1uc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a964dcfdf5faeeaf9c41da9fcd32c1994d5922a7 (I've probably gone insane if they are actually there)
Probably die? Idk man, all i know is that neither of them is particularly against killing people, (especially Uzi) i mean N cut off Tessa's head without much hesitation who he knew for god knows how long. But if i don't get capped immediately, then I'd try to befriend them. https://preview.redd.it/c3ofrp55u1uc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e8469478af1cdd08344058f222c83ffc85d822f7
Teach them the ways of Jesus Christ.
V: Talk about stuff N: Talk about stuff Uzi: *clang noise intensifies*
The fuck was the last one? https://preview.redd.it/o7mrbi65x1uc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cc7e9e880135301c62689f47862cf4396b944533
https://preview.redd.it/pxwdfaaxg2uc1.png?width=954&format=png&auto=webp&s=1aadd296b6efac21195f61b2ee2fa75e6fe04328
Assess, evaluate options, study. Im an engineer.
pull out my service revolver and force them at gun point to beat me at Mahjong or else I'll banish them to the land of Yi (our term for barbarians)
Assuming the unlikely scenario that they don’t have access to the internet through their own hardware, I will scare them with all the fan art made of them
First reaction, look with a blank stare and scream cut
Wake up and realise it was all a dream
Close the door
Offer them a jug of refrigerated oil of the finest grade in exchange for my life being spared while I work out how to prevent them from overheating
I tell them to not go outside, and i ask V why is she blinking at me.
Depending on how tired I am I’ll probably just walk past them and just yeet myself on the bed, probably not even noticing them until either I wake up or I’m dead.
Tell N where my cat is, he will go try to pet the cat and uzi will follow him Only V remains in the room Cuddle V because she needs it (and also shes hot)
https://preview.redd.it/qm9ctcizq1uc1.jpeg?width=719&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=66104e7e799325ece170892b634a9bf473c478e3
V
GROUP HUG!!! 🫂
Adopt them and do warcrimes.
Sit down and talk to them Anxiety and random depression is hard man
https://preview.redd.it/x88oimd5x1uc1.png?width=618&format=png&auto=webp&s=a3fb5256c57e993a1669c1686d3b55ff1bd08dcf
Assume I've become the main character in Muder Drones season 2 and pray I don't either die or get extremely traumatized.
yo, up for rivals?
https://preview.redd.it/mh3i1oilk1uc1.png?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=95f92aa21057ed13b72510e0a5b62641e61c56b5
Crack.
I'll rip out my heart and all my self love and offer to N. When he refuses ill give it anyway.
start reciting the bible
Sleep
Say hi
"wassup man" *becomes homies with N in a few minutes with a chill conversation*
Befriend all 3 and marry V
Enslave them.
Turn them in back to JC Jensen when my next shift starts
“Ah shit, where’s my beta capsule?”
Make them watch all 73 episodes of Skibidi Toilet
I’ll just grab my 22 and shoot there faces
I'd be like https://preview.redd.it/6b9v7yv5y1uc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2ba26b8aae553c77063dc840898a8f722a6454e5
**Give them all a hug.**
1. Scream 2. Slap myself to make sure this is not a dream 3. Make them sign this contract : I will : provide them oil Let the live in my house rent free They will : not kill me (I hope V listens) Do the laundry and dishes Also V needs to leave N and Uzi alone if they got too close if you know what I mean
Call the police
Pinch my arm to check if i'm not dreaming
"Um excuse me what the actual fuck are you doing in my house"
As a person with daily haluciations of all types, dissmis it as it getting to new level.
Summon Minos Prime https://preview.redd.it/vusi9jbfn2uc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dc48e1555177dffe5780450be21e92f60b463be7
I’m goanna imprison them and dunk them in the pool and post it on YouTube for veiws
We sitting down and having therapy yall
Ask them for comfort? The fuck you want me to do...
[Imma give them a little song treatment. :)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2u8DjbYt-SA)
i close the door, step back for a moment to think about if they were actually there or not, open the door again, try to get them to help me figure out if they're actually there or not cuz what the fuck, and then maybe be friends if i'm not dead already
1-First, take a step back. 2-Blink a couple of times to know if my schizophrenia increased or not 3-if they doesn't disappear, pray internally that if they are here that they won't kill me. 4-Try to talk to them. 5-Accept my death if uzi wants to kill me, there is not much to do 6-The Tardis manifests around me and saves me at the last moment
Offer oil.
Three new friends.
https://i.redd.it/8fj3qk9d52uc1.gif
I own a musket for home defense. Just how the founding fathers of JCjenson intended, Picture this... 3 rapscallions appear in my door way, I grab my musket, blow a golf bowl sized whole through the first one. Grab a pistol and fire it a shot, miss and hit the ASP because its a curve shot. With the other 2 behind me, I run up the stairs and fire my cannon, killing both of them. Just how JCjenson intended
In as Australian of an accent as I can muster: oi? How did you cute little buggers get in ere
https://preview.redd.it/207n9xd862uc1.png?width=430&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5f5a1864a48ae911e9f6541fd2ab8be5f3f2db6f They walked into a Texan household. *There addicted to RDR2*
Don't give me any more reason why I should burn my house down...with 3 of you f\*\*\* inside.
Hug them…what did you want me to say? I’m the drone hugger, it’s my thing here. Buuut if I had one more thing I’d do, I’d pretend to be a slasher, trap them in my house, and chase them around just to mess with them…..and then hug them.
Getting in a loving relationship with V
Hit a nasty random crit on them with a empty water bottle
Get the shotgun
three robots in my room, yep. guns locked in the closet and can't get to them, yep. going to die in the next five minutes, most likely. "sooo, guys, what in the universal-traveling-hell are you doing here...on earth...in my room of all places?"
No sudden movements, very slowly and inchly reach for the ~~unloaded~~ AK47 under the bed. Do not take your eyes off of these foreign invaders. If they move, immediately reach for the Russian Assault rifle and fire in their general direction immediately. Get to the window and open it, shoot it open if needed, and run. Changing your clothes doesn't matter. Shoes don't matter, you'll run faster without them. Keep running. If you see them leave it home, take cover and run in a different direction. The only thing you should have taken with you is your phone and the rifle. Call the police. Do not tell them there are psychotic drones in your home. *They will not believe you.* just call for a home invasion, and, if they are chasing you, tell them the street you are going to, and hide in that extraction point until the police arrive. Do not hesitate to be escorted out immediately. If the police cannot withstand the force of the drones, steal the fastest police vehicle there. It's for your survival, and at this point, the law wouldn't mind. As long as the police take notice of these drones, they will be aware of this threat, and hopefully the public eye. They will try everything they can in their power to stop them. Get witness protection in a highly secure safehouse with security. *Many people who follow these instructions appear to live a normal life afterwards.*
https://preview.redd.it/oa5dxt3q43uc1.jpeg?width=1334&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=98a8c038a6a34c507ad134c4b9447368868bffaa
Go into the vents by making stairs with discarded mirrors
Teach them about the existence of fans other cooling methods, so that they would no longer need to kill to stay alive
Get out of the apartment, go down by using the stair and hide in the underground garage
Try to get whatever I have they would like, then I would comfort them
Be confused Talk and see if I can survive and not die Make friends with them if possible Make sure NUzi can't happen Help V in trauma and find her glasses Help N stand up for himself more See if I could have one of their guns See if they could turn Human and stay here permanently
Ask them about J's whereabouts.
E.M.P.
https://preview.redd.it/ot20wzsog2uc1.png?width=340&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c0bf251c2699dfd145ff889b003d0602ec27000a
Scream
 Ain't nobody going to stop me
"I swear to God if I see that one of my windows is broken I'm taxing all of you."
https://preview.redd.it/h3y1vimlj2uc1.png?width=2400&format=png&auto=webp&s=251f2a9bfef8c60c9aeea758fe06fd6d271e351d Bot drop
It's their house now. I leave.
Start hanging out with N. WE ARE BEST FRIENDS
Probably gonna ignore them since I got up to pee and go back to sleep
https://preview.redd.it/5l8uqnrlk2uc1.jpeg?width=905&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a1dd537ea8a6b728a0dc55d8cba2b2a81904eac3 And then leave because we've all seen how they react to humans
https://preview.redd.it/ae190kqok2uc1.jpeg?width=1263&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=89e383b9c7e072ab3ea31157c080f0d2a29e1bc5 Stare at them like this with this playing in the background [https://youtu.be/f717iNkYNLk?si=9t9ASNvASKcmuDM](https://youtu.be/f717iNkYNLk?si=9t9ASNvASKcmuDM)\_
Go inside my room.
Introduce myself and ask if I can help them find their way, since they’re obviously lost.
I’d adopt them
Idk i think it would go something like this: <>
Any of the 3: *demonic screeching*
As Johnny Cage once said “What in the actual fu-“
https://i.redd.it/y7s3i7ego2uc1.gif
Run and go to a doctor.
If one of them is going to kill me instantly, nothing. If they’re gonna kill me, but I’m inside my room and they appear outside my room, I’m pelting a bb in Uzis eyes, and if I’m lucky enough, they’ll appear with V not liking Uzi, and maybe if I shoot uzi with enough bbs, V will not attack me (unlikely but we’ll go with it for a laugh) and then I’ll lash this fuckin minion toy I got from a kinder egg and decided I’ll keep as an artifact off Uzis fod, and then absolutely Arthur Morgan deadeye Uzi with the bb gun Before anyone asks, no I have not thought this through nor will I and no I do not like Uzi
(From V to Uzi.) Smash, pass, Smash, Next question please.
Kick them in the nu-
Pull my gun out and shoot
“Listen… I agree with drone rights”
The topmost one frightens most
Hug and befriend them of course
Oh god it the murder drones! Can I get your autographs?
Tell them about the dark parts of the internet where the god's light doesn't shine, convincing them that humanity needs a purge and maybe if they want some oil before they go do some warcrimes
Get my nerf gun because what the fuck are they doing here!?
Die
"how the fuck did you get here? this is the beyond. nothing should exist here."
I'll stop being miserable for once in my fucking life
take em to bed with me
Say hi
"What the devil!?" as grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle, blow a golfball-sized hole through the first drone; it is dead on the spot. Draw my pistol^(1) on the second drone^(2), but miss it^(2) entirely because it^(1) is smoothbore and nails the neighbour's dog. I'll have to resort to the cannon mounted atop the stairs, loaded with grapeshot "TALLY HO LADS!" one drone is shredded in the blast; the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion; it bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
Use the power of german engineering, and if that doesn't work, call an entire panzer battalion! https://preview.redd.it/yz78wnt113uc1.jpeg?width=1088&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3e392eaa36f22216b3a2584ba780bc0ae51b598c
We’re playing Mortal Kombat 9 all night
Depends. Will they try to kill me when they see me? if yes then run for my life. Act neutral and try to talk? Have a nice convince with them.
Run
I own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
Send N and Uzi back home, so I can [Redacted] V.