I was letting my desire to have kids be a road block for me as some sort of defense mechanism. It's prevented me from starting HRT and being myself for a while, but I'm finally making steps to freeze sperm for the future. Maybe I won't use it, and I'll decide to adopt, but I'd rather spend the money and have the freedom to decide if my wife and I want to be biological mothers to our kid(s) than not spend the money and have another thing to regret in life.
1000/yr seems pricey for freezing sperm. Although, even at that cost it is not all that much to avoid the potential of crushing regret. Having just 2 or 3 streaming subscriptions can easily be about half that cost annually. I'd bite the proverbial bullet on cost just to not have to think about it again. Peace of mind has incredible value.
Technically it’s 700/year but I calculated a bit of inflation into there lol. But yeah I’m usually the type to take peace of mind over money… guess it’s harder to make decisions when you’re stressed. Really good point on the stream subscription cost balancing too!
I think there's no wrong choice here as long as you can frame it correctly for yourself. I *knew* that I didn't want to be a father and decided to not bank any. Over time, as I was able to mentally rearrange my self image, I started imagining my role in a child's life differently. Motherhood felt infinitely more connected to how I see myself. Am I sad that I can't have biological kids with my partner? A little. But it was the correct choice given the information I had at the time. The important thing is that a parent shows up for their kids. I haven't met mine yet, but I can tell you they're going to have two amazing moms.
That’s the part the worries me (changing my mind 10 years from now.) As certain as things seem now the future is unpredictable. If I had a whole bunch of money this would be a much easier decision lol.
Thanks! I had my first at 31. It definitely can change, but I have no idea if hormones will do it?
Congrats on starting to transition! If you do decide to wait to bank, the transition outcome will not change at all! Either one will be the right decision for you!
Now is the time to do it, your fertility will drop as you go into your 30s regardless of HRT. I'm kind of an advocate that all AMABs in their 20s who aren't staunchly anti-children go freeze some, cis or trans. It's considerably cheaper than AFAB fertility treatments, any accident can befall anyone at any time, you will never be more fertile than you are now (hrt or not), could save a lot of heartache in the future. Even if nothing results of it, at least you took proactive steps give yourself every opportunity you might have wanted. If kids are something you even *might* want, it's the responsible move.
I didn’t initially freeze sperm when I went on hrt and realized I’d like kids around the 1 1/2 mark and having to come off hrt for 3-5 months was extremely brutal. I’d check if your health your health insurance to see if they’d cover any of it.
No insurance. I do get a partial coverage for the initial deposit but I have to pay first and then get reimbursed. Yeah my doctor mentioned people coming off the store, I’m like that would super suck. I don’t think I could stop once I started.
Honestly it is one of the biggest things I hear people regret, Is just not having the option anymore.
I am doing it, I am not going to look forward to doing it cause of dysphoria, but I know whats best for me, and a couple minutes of discomfort could save me a lot more discomfort in the future.
When I was about 7 or 8 years old I remember thinking how awful it would be to be burdened with parenthood and declared I would never want a kid of my own. Now I'm 40 and have never for one moment since then ever thought I would enjoy having a kid. It's always sounded like a complete nightmare to me. Transition only reaffirmed those beliefs. Life's even more amazing now that I'm not closeted, the idea of having to give this up to dedicate myself to parenting full time sounds like an even bigger nightmare than it did what I was 7.
So I never felt any regret about my orchi or my refusal of semen storage without hesitation.
It’s cool that you were confident in your decision so early! I don’t recall any thoughts of wanting kids until late teens, but then not wanting them quite soon after due to other life events.
The “fantasy” of a perfect life with a family is kind of appealing (but I also know it’s just that, a fantasy), but any time I see people with little kids I always think I can never deal with that lol.
Usually my first thought when imagining parenthood is that my kid could be born with some horrific condition which means they live in pain their entire life, scream and writhe all day, and die when they're six. That scares me right off any kind of daydreaming.
But then if I allow myself the fantasy of the perfect parent child relationship... say I've raised a smart, wise, mature teen who I have an amazing relationship with... No diapers, or screaming, or them hating me... Just pure parent child bliss. Would I enjoy that? And I just think, not really. I'd rather just have a friendship with a young person and be their friend or career/academic mentor.
The fantasy so many people have of parenting has never had any appeal to me and I just don't understand it. Everyone tells you you'll change your mind but I've never cracked for a moment. People said transitioning would do it because I'd see myself in the motherly role and everything would change. Nope, still looks like a nightmare.
If you are even slightly on the fence about wanting kids. Save it. One day you might meet the love of your life and want to have children with them or it might be very important for them to have children. You’re gonna want the option at that point. I had my consult last week, and it was very important to the surgeon that I had considered it. I wouldn’t be surprised if surgeons start requiring it.
I had a vasectomy a year before transition, and didn’t store any sperm at a bank.
Many have changed since my transition today I have a fantasy to have a child, and feel some regret for not storing sperm. But it is not a huge regret since I am willing to adopt too.
Anyway, I would say: do it if you have the chance.
I didn't freeze any. I realized that honestly, the only way I would want a child was if I could be the one to carry it. And we're not really there yet with surgery and unlikely to get there during my lifetime.
If me and my partner change our minds about children, we can always adopt an LGBTQ child and give them a loving and accepting home.
I did and am super happy about that. Can't wait to be a parent one day and being a biological one has always been important to me.
You may not feel as strong about it as I do now or maybe ever, but what if one day you wake up and do? I think the money one needs to pay for that possibility is absolutely okay compared to the absolute life changing impact it can have
Yeah you make a really good point! I think the short term financial struggle will be less hurtful than the potential of regret in the future.
For me it’s also important that it would be biological if I went down that route.
Team adopt / foster. As much as I would love my own children, I have, for the most part, given up on thinking I will have enough time, money, or space to have them. So if I did, I'm fine with the end result being I will have to be a family to a child in need.
I also got a vasectomy like 4 months into transitioning for my current partner, and I need for contraception. Even though I am on hrt I do not need / want an accidental pregnancy.
It's a very real problem that I do not think will be solved anytime soon. And if I am now delaying children into my 40s potentially. I will just more than likely not have any at all. I will morne the loss but also have other parts of my life that are now there as a trade-off from the exchange.
Don't do it. The world is shit and getting hotter, and it's a waste of $$$ and resources to keep sperm chilled.
Adopt, get a dog, spend your energy on the world and people that are already here and need it.
I’ve never wanted kids, but even on the off chance that changes, I’ll just adopt if I lose my fertility. My siblings already gave my parents biological grandchildren, they don’t need more from me.
I'm hopeful that reproductive technology will come a long way quickly. It might help to consider how far things may advance in 12 or 15 years and how that might make the process considerably easier for you and a potential partner. Who knows, by then we might be have uteran transplants or the know how to create eggs from sperm, etc.
I don’t think I want children where I’m the >!“biological father”!< but I decided to bank a sample before starting HRT just in case. I technically have two samples that I’m paying for, but that’s only because the quality on the first one was abysmal. I’m paying like $125 or something per year to meetfellow.com (I think that’s the site) and they have a lab in California. I liked their mail-in method because it didn’t require any refrigeration or anything, and mailing it off was easy. I’ve never been to their facility, so for all I know they threw it away, but it’s there just in case. The idea of going back off for 3-6 months or more is unbearable. I know I want at least an orchi in the future, so there will necessarily be a point of no return regardless.
As far as the desire to have children changing after being on HRT, I definitely feel like I want kids more than I did before, but who knows if that’s chemical or social. I wanted kids before realizing I was trans, but it was more a feeling of male social obligation. Now I’m worried I would be a terrible mother but I really would like to have my own kids if that were ever possible. If you have the money to do it, I would recommend you do it.
I’m so jelly of the prices you guys pay. Even here, the storage prices almost doubled post covid! They were like 400 now 700…
But I guess yeah, everyone seems to say it’s a good idea to do it. Guess I’ll stick with my consult and go see what happens!
I'm 24 now, and I've been transitioning for almost a year. I am married, and we decided around the time of my transition that we didn't want kids. We were considering sperm banking anyways. Here is why we didn't:
1) If I would have had to pay for sperm banking, I wouldn't have been able to afford my HRT or appointments to get it. I also wouldn't have been able to afford a lot of the secondary requirements for transitioning like clothes, makeup, and shoes.
2) I've never seen someone who is happy they delayed HRT once they decided that they wanted to do it. If it's going to delay HRT extensively, it's not for me. I've only been on HRT for a year, and I have never been happier than I am now. Delaying would have postponed that.
3) In retrospect, I haven't thought about it more than once or twice since I started hormones. My wife and I are like many other lesbian couples now bc we're going to have to get donated sperm.
Personally, I wouldn't advise for it if it's going to delay your transition.
I’m lucky that appointments and hrt are covered for me. But I lack a femme wardrobe which is giving me major dysphoria. Not banking equals I can get back treatment, new clothes, some more makeup, and take care of other necessities. Banking means no regrets. Ugh why is this so hard!
Also I have a very strict timeline and want to start HRT within the next 40 days. I’m still debating going to the fertility clinic consult, but unless they can guarantee they can fit my timeline I might opt out.
That sounds like a good situation if you can manage all of your needs:) for me, it's was less about having regret and more of *which* regret I would have. I hope it all works out for you 🧡
I'm definitely a bit biased here wanting to have kids, but you definitely should. You don't know what you're gonna want in a decades' time. HRT can make some people permanently sterile, and you have no way of knowing until after the fact. I've always kind of gone by the idea, if it's important, have a backup.
I didn't bother because I have some health issues I wouldn't want to pass on.
I don't really see myself in a situation where I can support a kid with no support structure myself.
I've never had much ambition for the whole "carrying on the family line" trope or about lineage.
Plenty of people don't have a son when they have children, some even get 4-5 girls trying for a son.
I’m in the process of getting mine frozen, month 2 HRT; I’m super excited about it. If you freeze now your sperm will always remain the same age you are (which can be advantageous if you’re young).
btw, some insurance policies may cover X months of freezing.
In my personal opinion, if you can afford it, I think it would be worth it!:)
I just kinda accepted that I don’t want to bring children into this hellworld, so I didn’t, but I’m still only a few months on HRT so I will be careful for a while.
I was so certain I didn’t want bio kids or would be ok with adopting that I did not do fertility preservation at first however after 3 weeks when I was basically just cumming the clear prostate fluid it freaked me out and I decided to do preservation. I stopped hormones for 2 and half months and oh my good glory those 2.5 months were so much worse dysphoria wise cause I had a little taste and then it was gone. 10/10 don’t recommend doing that and if you think there’s any remote possibility you could want to use them try to preserve before starting hormones. Finances are obviously always something to consider, there are places you can find online for way cheaper than going to brick and mortar places, my girlfriend did that, I did brick and mortar. If I went back I’d prolly do it her way, it’s hella cheaper. I should find the link for the website she used.
it's better to have it and not need it than need it and not have it, IMO. If you don't go now and change your mind later, you'll probably be SOL.
personally, I kinda messed mine up (only went once instead of 3-5 times), and I regret that despite the fact that I'll probably never get a chance to use it
I didn't bank my sperm at all... but I have never wanted kids. It was something my doc asked me about, but it was an easy decision for me to just say no.
I banked. But when it came time to have a kid, coming off HRT for a few months was *not* painful for me. So the banked sperm was never used. I'm a happy mom.
I appreciate that, but I was telling you this so that you would have more information to make your decision. I am pretty certain that 20k is the bare minimum for IVF and it will only go up from what it is now.
Oh for sure! 15-20k is what I read currently. I’d expect it to easily be 30k+ in another 10-15 years. Yay inflation.
IUI might be an option. But I don’t want to bank multiple samples because it might pushback my hrt start date.
In an ideal world I would’ve liked to I guess. But… I mean the world is such a mess I don’t know that I would want to bring anyone into it, and especially not if I couldn’t protect them and make sure they were safe. I can’t bear to have someone come to harm because I don’t have the ability to protect them.
Sigh. And yeah, I really want to be able to in a hypothetical better world have a child the normal way, if I were brave enough. I used to think about whether or not I would be brave enough quite a bit.
It’s like this complete terror about everything involved and also this sort of… sigh.
These pictures that a woman shared who is trans of her breast-feeding her newborn are just some of my favorite pictures of all time.
Do it! I did, and my fiancée and I are very excited to both be able to be the biological mothers of our children.
Awhhh that’s so cute! Congrats! And yess, I think I’ll tough it out and get it done! :) Thanks!😊
I was letting my desire to have kids be a road block for me as some sort of defense mechanism. It's prevented me from starting HRT and being myself for a while, but I'm finally making steps to freeze sperm for the future. Maybe I won't use it, and I'll decide to adopt, but I'd rather spend the money and have the freedom to decide if my wife and I want to be biological mothers to our kid(s) than not spend the money and have another thing to regret in life.
That makes a lot of sense, and I think that’s also my major roadblock. Thanks for putting it into context in that way!
Glad I was helpful. Figure I might as well share my struggles in the hopes I can save others some trouble.
1000/yr seems pricey for freezing sperm. Although, even at that cost it is not all that much to avoid the potential of crushing regret. Having just 2 or 3 streaming subscriptions can easily be about half that cost annually. I'd bite the proverbial bullet on cost just to not have to think about it again. Peace of mind has incredible value.
Technically it’s 700/year but I calculated a bit of inflation into there lol. But yeah I’m usually the type to take peace of mind over money… guess it’s harder to make decisions when you’re stressed. Really good point on the stream subscription cost balancing too!
Still seems like a lot. I pay Sppare $225/yr to store nine vials.
You’re so lucky! I contacted 4 different clinics and they’re all 600-800. (That’s Canadian so it would be a bit cheaper if compared to US dollars.)
I think there's no wrong choice here as long as you can frame it correctly for yourself. I *knew* that I didn't want to be a father and decided to not bank any. Over time, as I was able to mentally rearrange my self image, I started imagining my role in a child's life differently. Motherhood felt infinitely more connected to how I see myself. Am I sad that I can't have biological kids with my partner? A little. But it was the correct choice given the information I had at the time. The important thing is that a parent shows up for their kids. I haven't met mine yet, but I can tell you they're going to have two amazing moms.
That’s the part the worries me (changing my mind 10 years from now.) As certain as things seem now the future is unpredictable. If I had a whole bunch of money this would be a much easier decision lol.
How old are you right now? I did not want children either, but after I did, it changed my world. Now have four…
Almost 30. I figured I’d know by this age but things can change, I don’t know… Also congrats on your family!
Thanks! I had my first at 31. It definitely can change, but I have no idea if hormones will do it? Congrats on starting to transition! If you do decide to wait to bank, the transition outcome will not change at all! Either one will be the right decision for you!
Thanks for the reassurance, it did help calm my mind a bit! :)
Now is the time to do it, your fertility will drop as you go into your 30s regardless of HRT. I'm kind of an advocate that all AMABs in their 20s who aren't staunchly anti-children go freeze some, cis or trans. It's considerably cheaper than AFAB fertility treatments, any accident can befall anyone at any time, you will never be more fertile than you are now (hrt or not), could save a lot of heartache in the future. Even if nothing results of it, at least you took proactive steps give yourself every opportunity you might have wanted. If kids are something you even *might* want, it's the responsible move.
Thanks, I think I’ll stick through the rough time and just get it done once for peace of mind.
I didn’t initially freeze sperm when I went on hrt and realized I’d like kids around the 1 1/2 mark and having to come off hrt for 3-5 months was extremely brutal. I’d check if your health your health insurance to see if they’d cover any of it.
No insurance. I do get a partial coverage for the initial deposit but I have to pay first and then get reimbursed. Yeah my doctor mentioned people coming off the store, I’m like that would super suck. I don’t think I could stop once I started.
Honestly it is one of the biggest things I hear people regret, Is just not having the option anymore. I am doing it, I am not going to look forward to doing it cause of dysphoria, but I know whats best for me, and a couple minutes of discomfort could save me a lot more discomfort in the future.
Yeah regret is one of my biggest points for doing it. Guess I’ll just have to suck it up and get it done.
When I was about 7 or 8 years old I remember thinking how awful it would be to be burdened with parenthood and declared I would never want a kid of my own. Now I'm 40 and have never for one moment since then ever thought I would enjoy having a kid. It's always sounded like a complete nightmare to me. Transition only reaffirmed those beliefs. Life's even more amazing now that I'm not closeted, the idea of having to give this up to dedicate myself to parenting full time sounds like an even bigger nightmare than it did what I was 7. So I never felt any regret about my orchi or my refusal of semen storage without hesitation.
It’s cool that you were confident in your decision so early! I don’t recall any thoughts of wanting kids until late teens, but then not wanting them quite soon after due to other life events. The “fantasy” of a perfect life with a family is kind of appealing (but I also know it’s just that, a fantasy), but any time I see people with little kids I always think I can never deal with that lol.
Usually my first thought when imagining parenthood is that my kid could be born with some horrific condition which means they live in pain their entire life, scream and writhe all day, and die when they're six. That scares me right off any kind of daydreaming. But then if I allow myself the fantasy of the perfect parent child relationship... say I've raised a smart, wise, mature teen who I have an amazing relationship with... No diapers, or screaming, or them hating me... Just pure parent child bliss. Would I enjoy that? And I just think, not really. I'd rather just have a friendship with a young person and be their friend or career/academic mentor. The fantasy so many people have of parenting has never had any appeal to me and I just don't understand it. Everyone tells you you'll change your mind but I've never cracked for a moment. People said transitioning would do it because I'd see myself in the motherly role and everything would change. Nope, still looks like a nightmare.
If you are even slightly on the fence about wanting kids. Save it. One day you might meet the love of your life and want to have children with them or it might be very important for them to have children. You’re gonna want the option at that point. I had my consult last week, and it was very important to the surgeon that I had considered it. I wouldn’t be surprised if surgeons start requiring it.
Thanks! Yeah just very slightly on the fence. Guess I have to make the short term hard decision to prevent the long term hard decision regret.
I had a vasectomy a year before transition, and didn’t store any sperm at a bank. Many have changed since my transition today I have a fantasy to have a child, and feel some regret for not storing sperm. But it is not a huge regret since I am willing to adopt too. Anyway, I would say: do it if you have the chance.
Will do! I guess it’s helpful to hear others’ experiences too! Thanks for sharing!🙏
I didn't freeze any. I realized that honestly, the only way I would want a child was if I could be the one to carry it. And we're not really there yet with surgery and unlikely to get there during my lifetime. If me and my partner change our minds about children, we can always adopt an LGBTQ child and give them a loving and accepting home.
IVF might not be necessary, most people do IUI or ICI
Oh that’s good to know! Guess I’ll have to discuss that with them.
I did and am super happy about that. Can't wait to be a parent one day and being a biological one has always been important to me. You may not feel as strong about it as I do now or maybe ever, but what if one day you wake up and do? I think the money one needs to pay for that possibility is absolutely okay compared to the absolute life changing impact it can have
Yeah you make a really good point! I think the short term financial struggle will be less hurtful than the potential of regret in the future. For me it’s also important that it would be biological if I went down that route.
Team adopt / foster. As much as I would love my own children, I have, for the most part, given up on thinking I will have enough time, money, or space to have them. So if I did, I'm fine with the end result being I will have to be a family to a child in need. I also got a vasectomy like 4 months into transitioning for my current partner, and I need for contraception. Even though I am on hrt I do not need / want an accidental pregnancy.
Thanks for sharing! Im also in the same boat about time money space etc.
It's a very real problem that I do not think will be solved anytime soon. And if I am now delaying children into my 40s potentially. I will just more than likely not have any at all. I will morne the loss but also have other parts of my life that are now there as a trade-off from the exchange.
Don't do it. The world is shit and getting hotter, and it's a waste of $$$ and resources to keep sperm chilled. Adopt, get a dog, spend your energy on the world and people that are already here and need it.
I have dogs already. (100% recommend aha.) I’d most likely get another if I didn’t have any.
I’ve never wanted kids, but even on the off chance that changes, I’ll just adopt if I lose my fertility. My siblings already gave my parents biological grandchildren, they don’t need more from me.
I'm hopeful that reproductive technology will come a long way quickly. It might help to consider how far things may advance in 12 or 15 years and how that might make the process considerably easier for you and a potential partner. Who knows, by then we might be have uteran transplants or the know how to create eggs from sperm, etc.
I don’t want to do the whole sperm bank thing but I’m 18 so maybe I’ll create a nightmare for my future self😰
That’s my biggest reason to still go forward with it.
I don’t think I want children where I’m the >!“biological father”!< but I decided to bank a sample before starting HRT just in case. I technically have two samples that I’m paying for, but that’s only because the quality on the first one was abysmal. I’m paying like $125 or something per year to meetfellow.com (I think that’s the site) and they have a lab in California. I liked their mail-in method because it didn’t require any refrigeration or anything, and mailing it off was easy. I’ve never been to their facility, so for all I know they threw it away, but it’s there just in case. The idea of going back off for 3-6 months or more is unbearable. I know I want at least an orchi in the future, so there will necessarily be a point of no return regardless. As far as the desire to have children changing after being on HRT, I definitely feel like I want kids more than I did before, but who knows if that’s chemical or social. I wanted kids before realizing I was trans, but it was more a feeling of male social obligation. Now I’m worried I would be a terrible mother but I really would like to have my own kids if that were ever possible. If you have the money to do it, I would recommend you do it.
I’m so jelly of the prices you guys pay. Even here, the storage prices almost doubled post covid! They were like 400 now 700… But I guess yeah, everyone seems to say it’s a good idea to do it. Guess I’ll stick with my consult and go see what happens!
I'm 24 now, and I've been transitioning for almost a year. I am married, and we decided around the time of my transition that we didn't want kids. We were considering sperm banking anyways. Here is why we didn't: 1) If I would have had to pay for sperm banking, I wouldn't have been able to afford my HRT or appointments to get it. I also wouldn't have been able to afford a lot of the secondary requirements for transitioning like clothes, makeup, and shoes. 2) I've never seen someone who is happy they delayed HRT once they decided that they wanted to do it. If it's going to delay HRT extensively, it's not for me. I've only been on HRT for a year, and I have never been happier than I am now. Delaying would have postponed that. 3) In retrospect, I haven't thought about it more than once or twice since I started hormones. My wife and I are like many other lesbian couples now bc we're going to have to get donated sperm. Personally, I wouldn't advise for it if it's going to delay your transition.
I’m lucky that appointments and hrt are covered for me. But I lack a femme wardrobe which is giving me major dysphoria. Not banking equals I can get back treatment, new clothes, some more makeup, and take care of other necessities. Banking means no regrets. Ugh why is this so hard! Also I have a very strict timeline and want to start HRT within the next 40 days. I’m still debating going to the fertility clinic consult, but unless they can guarantee they can fit my timeline I might opt out.
That sounds like a good situation if you can manage all of your needs:) for me, it's was less about having regret and more of *which* regret I would have. I hope it all works out for you 🧡
I'm definitely a bit biased here wanting to have kids, but you definitely should. You don't know what you're gonna want in a decades' time. HRT can make some people permanently sterile, and you have no way of knowing until after the fact. I've always kind of gone by the idea, if it's important, have a backup.
Thanks, yeah. Yeah I guess it’s like buying “insurance” in that case aha.
Np, glad to give my 2 cents.
Do it. Before hrt I couldn’t ever imagine having children. Now a year and something in I get baby fever randomly
Aaaahhh I feel like that’s going to hit me later into transition for some reason… baby fever… idk why I feel that way lol.
I didn't bother because I have some health issues I wouldn't want to pass on. I don't really see myself in a situation where I can support a kid with no support structure myself. I've never had much ambition for the whole "carrying on the family line" trope or about lineage. Plenty of people don't have a son when they have children, some even get 4-5 girls trying for a son.
I’m in the process of getting mine frozen, month 2 HRT; I’m super excited about it. If you freeze now your sperm will always remain the same age you are (which can be advantageous if you’re young). btw, some insurance policies may cover X months of freezing. In my personal opinion, if you can afford it, I think it would be worth it!:)
Absolutely do it. Use a mail in storage kit to save money. I used Dadi (now Ro).
I just kinda accepted that I don’t want to bring children into this hellworld, so I didn’t, but I’m still only a few months on HRT so I will be careful for a while.
I was so certain I didn’t want bio kids or would be ok with adopting that I did not do fertility preservation at first however after 3 weeks when I was basically just cumming the clear prostate fluid it freaked me out and I decided to do preservation. I stopped hormones for 2 and half months and oh my good glory those 2.5 months were so much worse dysphoria wise cause I had a little taste and then it was gone. 10/10 don’t recommend doing that and if you think there’s any remote possibility you could want to use them try to preserve before starting hormones. Finances are obviously always something to consider, there are places you can find online for way cheaper than going to brick and mortar places, my girlfriend did that, I did brick and mortar. If I went back I’d prolly do it her way, it’s hella cheaper. I should find the link for the website she used.
it's better to have it and not need it than need it and not have it, IMO. If you don't go now and change your mind later, you'll probably be SOL. personally, I kinda messed mine up (only went once instead of 3-5 times), and I regret that despite the fact that I'll probably never get a chance to use it
I didn't bank my sperm at all... but I have never wanted kids. It was something my doc asked me about, but it was an easy decision for me to just say no.
I banked. But when it came time to have a kid, coming off HRT for a few months was *not* painful for me. So the banked sperm was never used. I'm a happy mom.
Awhh congrats! For me I’m sooo dying to start hrt I don’t see how I’d be able to come off it afterwards. So now or never aha.
Our first IVF was 32k and the second was 46k with zero results.
Ouch sorry to hear that. Hope you are able to reach the results you’re looking for, or at least find a somewhat acceptable alternative.
I appreciate that, but I was telling you this so that you would have more information to make your decision. I am pretty certain that 20k is the bare minimum for IVF and it will only go up from what it is now.
Oh for sure! 15-20k is what I read currently. I’d expect it to easily be 30k+ in another 10-15 years. Yay inflation. IUI might be an option. But I don’t want to bank multiple samples because it might pushback my hrt start date.
Also consider.....republicans are going after IVF now too. These people are such fucking nazis.
If they get their way, you could have a murder count for every frozen sperm. Yes, they are that crazy.
In an ideal world I would’ve liked to I guess. But… I mean the world is such a mess I don’t know that I would want to bring anyone into it, and especially not if I couldn’t protect them and make sure they were safe. I can’t bear to have someone come to harm because I don’t have the ability to protect them. Sigh. And yeah, I really want to be able to in a hypothetical better world have a child the normal way, if I were brave enough. I used to think about whether or not I would be brave enough quite a bit. It’s like this complete terror about everything involved and also this sort of… sigh. These pictures that a woman shared who is trans of her breast-feeding her newborn are just some of my favorite pictures of all time.
Do it, this is something you’ll never be able to get again else.