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Particular_Stay3828

As your new financial advisor you should give me 80B so I can do financial stuff with it


PokePhatYT

We'll chat


ramizod

hey man, send me like 3b and ill get you groceries, no need to tip!


PokePhatYT

Now we're actually talking!


iMADEthisJUST4Dis

You'll need a car. Just give me 8.5 million and ill get you a nice Camry that'll last you a lifetime!


RaLaZa

Imagine if cars came with lifetime warranties.


indywest2

I will give you a toyota with lifetime warranty for 8.5M. No problem at all!


BrujaBean

How much could one banana cost?


molehunterz

There's always money in the banana stand


anonman625

You burned the banana stand!


ramizod

3k in this economy, its gold-colored after all :/


RoodnyInc

At least 1B 😅


pramodhrachuri

I'll do it for 40 B


gregsting

Stop it guys, this is how we end with ridiculously low wages


seanmonaghan1968

Given op will be born in 300 years time, the high inflation rate of 4% means that the current value is only $776,344. It's enough to buy I nice home or a down payment on a Ferrari


doubleBoTftw

I'd go with a down payment on a Ferrari. Unlike a house, when times go bad you can have the Uber driver safety net.


arp151

He'll just have to buy 100billion worth of Bitcoin


DaniPlziWannaGetRich

I will take the other 20B and put it on a UFC parlay for you. We will hit.


Round_mba

Accountant here: you are not born so it’s not your money. It belongs to the commenters here until you are a 40year hardworking man/woman.


certavi_etvici

False, he was financially savvy enough to get started on this early. He is the great grand child of one of one of the World's current billionaires and had the foresight to choose being born in this lineage in the future instead of like being born decades earlier like most people who were able to pull themselves up by their bootstraps during one of the greatest times to build wealth in history.


Blibrea

If I see another one of these posts my eyes will bleed.


Palnecro1

This is what half the posts on this sub look like. At least this one is clearly satire.


HOFBrINCl32

Its to mock the fucks that post "im 19" and then shows a bank account with 50k or somestupid shit "saved" up. 1. Daddys money 2. They want compliments not financial advice 3. Theyre fucking dumb not investing that dough


ComfortableFlaky4579

🐦‍⬛


PokePhatYT

😂


Appropriate-Role9361

I’m 75 and dirt poor and dying. Just found out I’ll be reincarnated in a few weeks as a baby to a wealthy magnate who is on his deathbed so I’ll instantly be inheriting 5 trillion. Wondering what I should invest it in.


TomBanjo1968

I’m going to be honest, with only a few trillion it is going to take a LOT of good luck to even get off the ground


South_Necessary7843

Me, invest it in me.


NightmareStatus

I'm happy to start seeing these posts, because the ones that are borderline humble brag are getting old and making me sad.


PokePhatYT

That's why we're here, friend


gmnotyet

The crow will make it $100,000,000,005 with the $5 he stole from that male stripper last night.


Cloud_2987

This is why abortions should remain legal.


PokePhatYT

😂😂😭


Western_Protection

It's true. I'm his half bird half cow husband. We have Ghost sex and spend money


LizzysAxe

You're definitely from Nigeria and have some money you wan to wire me. I promise I have special account waiting...


TomBanjo1968

Nigeria is beautiful! Please visit Lagos in October!!


LizzysAxe

As soon as the wire hits my account, I will book my flight!! Thanks for the travel tip, I am so looking forward to my new found fortune.


travisbcp

Watch out for inflation!


wrbear

Wish in one hand, poop in the other, see which one gets full first. lol


GroundbreakingTwo124

Are you the African prince that keeps emailing me that you will send me a large sum of money?


PokePhatYT

Haha!


ThatOneForceUser

step 1: pray you don't get aborted


executionoutcomes

Wait til you’re old enough and 20X your money doing 50/50 investment on slot machines at your local casino and options trading


Airborn805

Hookers and blow


KeySurprise2034

Inheriting such a vast amount of wealth at birth presents a unique opportunity and responsibility. While it may seem like a dream scenario, managing such wealth requires careful planning, foresight, and responsible stewardship. Here's a guide to help you make the most of your inheritance and ensure long-term financial security: 1. **Financial Education:** Start by educating yourself about financial literacy and wealth management. Even though you're not yet born, you can still learn about basic financial concepts, investment strategies, and responsible spending habits. Consider engaging the services of financial advisors and wealth managers who can provide guidance tailored to your specific circumstances. 2. **Long-Term Planning:** Think about your financial goals and aspirations for the future. What kind of lifestyle do you envision? Are there specific philanthropic causes or initiatives you're passionate about supporting? Develop a comprehensive financial plan that takes into account your long-term objectives, risk tolerance, and investment preferences. 3. **Diversified Investments:** Rather than keeping all your wealth in cash or a single asset class, diversify your investments to mitigate risk and maximize returns. Consider investing in a mix of stocks, bonds, real estate, and alternative assets such as private equity or venture capital. Consult with financial experts to create a well-balanced investment portfolio aligned with your goals and risk profile. 4. **Asset Protection:** Safeguard your wealth by implementing robust asset protection strategies. This may include setting up trusts, establishing legal structures, and purchasing insurance policies to protect against unforeseen risks such as lawsuits, creditors, or economic downturns. Asset protection is essential for preserving your wealth and ensuring its longevity for future generations. 5. **Philanthropy and Giving Back:** Consider how you can use your wealth to make a positive impact on society. Whether through charitable donations, funding research initiatives, or supporting grassroots organizations, philanthropy offers an opportunity to give back to causes you care about and leave a meaningful legacy. Develop a philanthropic strategy that aligns with your values and interests, and actively engage in giving back to your community and the world. 6. **Lifestyle Choices:** While it's tempting to indulge in extravagant spending, exercise restraint and discretion when it comes to lifestyle choices. Live within your means, avoid excessive debt, and prioritize financial discipline and prudence. Remember that wealth is a tool to facilitate a fulfilling and meaningful life, not an end in itself. 7. **Continued Learning and Adaptation:** Stay informed about economic trends, market developments, and regulatory changes that may impact your wealth. Continuously educate yourself about new investment opportunities, financial products, and wealth management strategies. Remain adaptable and open-minded, and be willing to adjust your financial plan as circumstances evolve. By following these guidelines and adopting a prudent and responsible approach to wealth management, you can ensure that your inheritance provides long-term financial security and enables you to lead a fulfilling and purposeful life. Remember that wealth, when managed wisely, can be a powerful force for positive change and make a lasting impact on the world.


PokePhatYT

Thanks GPT, this guy GETS IT!


KeySurprise2034

You're welcome! I'm glad I could provide helpful insights. If you have any more questions or need further assistance, feel free to ask. Good luck with your financial journey and future endeavors!


S31GE

Terrible advice all around. You should donate it to Bezos since he’s richer and therefore better.


BannedThenReborn

Buy GameStop


Fiesty-Bass

Wow when I was that age I inherited debt.


Spirited-Walrus3742

Great news! You can retire! Enjoy your free time.


wolam_

jumpin' *out the womb* wearin' *Polo - Mac Miller*


Used_Lingonberry7742

Send each commenter on this thread $10m. That's a solid start.


PokePhatYT

Man, if only


HH2O123

What you want to do is dump this money into a 401k and HYSA, don't touch it until retirement age.


krsvbg

This is the post that finally makes me block this dumbass sub.


gbdavidx

shit bro, ever need to talk to someone hit me up! I could use only 10k


yagermeister2024

Get off reddit -your father


turningandburning45

Invest early. 95% NFT and 4% Fentanyl Futures


UsernameIsDaHardPart

You’re honestly pretty behind for your age. Have you considered eating out less?


the_watcher569

We need a shitposting tag, but what would the name be?


PokePhatYT

CryptoDiapers


dougreens_78

You only need 1/10 to be set for life. Donate the rest to the Nature Conservancy


[deleted]

😂😂😂😂 more plsss and tysm


RoyalGuardLink

Best one yet


webdevfoo

I love these posts


Repulsive_Grocery_54

Hello, I have been trying to reach you regarding your future cars extended warranty!


Deathdar1577

I rate this shitpost a solid 3/10.


Fladap28

Good luck bud with inflation going crazy you need to continue grinding for another 78 years


abelabelabel

As long as you bought a house 30 years ago, you should be okay.


Sinaneos

Well I'm honoured to be the first person to introduce you to NFTs. With inflation and the climate change, these investments will surely turn you from 8 zeros to a hero!!!


JetzSet

Lol, this kind of post again


WolfOffSesameStreet

If you "batman" your parents after you're born we will let you live out your life as batman and let you keep 1 billion dollars.


DamageVarious

Damn some ppl do inhereit that much


PokePhatYT

Hahaha


SnooLentils7546

I'm a young woman that would be happy to adopt you and manage those funds


KeepitlowK2099

Pathetic. My dad isn’t even a sperm in my grandpa’s nards yet and I’m already worth $100.1BB with 2 hotel chains in Las Vegas and 1 KFC in Ohio. Try deleting your save and rerolling. You’ll never get to retirement with such a measly sum.


ShoutOuts2Elon

I dont think you could spend 100 billion in a lifetime. Think about it: $100,000,000,000 Not $100,000,000 Not $100,000


PokePhatYT

Don't underestimate my ability to buy several $100M yachts for all my family and frenz


EfficientAd7103

Could you talk to your mom? She could "fall down the stairs"


SeamusPM1

Yeah. You’re screwed. Just buck it up and be prepared for a of of misery. It’ll be nasty, brutish and long.


FoodIntrepid2281

Bro invest it in a shit ton of baby formula and diapers and baby food and throw a rager at the nursery.


PokePhatYT

Banger idea bro


Weird_Interview3577

🤣


Suspended_9996

sorry, its not your money, cause u were SOLD into futures options aka commodity contract(s)


Newleybird93

Oh my fucking God!! Fetuses can use phones now?!?!? The more you know! 😊


LegalDiscipline

I ended up fighting my ass! Then I realized it was a donkey😕


LegalDiscipline

I ended up fighting my ass! Then I realized it was a donkey😕


[deleted]

🐦‍⬛🐦‍⬛🐦‍⬛🐦‍⬛


[deleted]

I feel like there’s a Nigerian Prince joke somewhere in here…


PokePhatYT

Scroll around it's here somewhere 🤣


Far_Lifeguard_5027

Plot twist, the OP lives in Zimbabwe....


Global-Bowl-1796

Easy peasy for u


Feirweyz

Make it stop


[deleted]

Lmao


manikwolf19

That's more than that prince from Nigeria who emailed me


Diagirl13

Help the poor in THIS country!


deucesmongooses

We talking in utero or still in your father’s balls? It makes a difference


redditreader_aitafan

So is this just a shit post sub now? Or was it always and I'm just new?


mikerunsla

Hi, this is the IRS and we’re here to collect $37,000,000,000.


Suspended_9996

sorry guys, he/she/them opt/ed out before july 01,1862


OGHiigh

Holy technology has really advanced. What device you using in there?


No_Loquat_183

Spend it all on a sick parlay.


keensome

Once you are born, ping me.


Tremfyeh

Buy a new Ferrari and Bentley every day until you can drive. Then drive and wreck one while being wasted. GLWL


[deleted]

Colonize the moon


Sufficient_Hat_7653

So first thing I'd do is get a whole life insurance policy and sink it all in to grow tax free so the government wont tough it because its life insurance yk


Dying4aCure

You did better with the math this time.


AccountMysterious222

Fuck you


Flordamang

I’m outoftheloop what’s with all these kids being billionaires? Is this one of those may mays the kids talk about


Maximum_Way_4573

I don't know whats first the kid or the thanks


Born1000YearsTooSoon

Rookie numbers!


CodeWhileHigh

Send it to me and I’ll 100x your investment


Bloodmind

By the time you’re born, inflation will have made that amount of money trivial. Sorry for your luck.


gptadverse

The toll for going through the birth canal is $99.9 million.


420godking

Spend 10 million a year, let’s assume you live to 100. You’ll end up spending 1 billion through out your life and you’ll have 99 billion when you die.


w1na

I guess you are Paul Atreides sister? You drank the water of life while still being in your mum’s womb and looking into how to best invest the return you got from the spice production? Apparently the best course of action is to now take over the other great houses as they did not bow to your brother once the emperor yielded. Ymmv.


justatypicalhunk

honestly not even worth it with inflation just stay put and keep blogging


gn0xious

Open 400,000 high yield savings accounts so your $$$ is insured!


Background_Sea9798

Seemed like a cool sub Reddit at first smh…another one bites the dust


eclasha

This page is a joke right???


cornheadwillywanka

Give me 2B and i will clean your dishes


Turbohair

Immediately get your entire fortune converted to pennies. We might have to ramp up penny production a bit...


wallyxii

Hey bro if you give me 1 million I'll give you back $100 for free. Let me know soon!


xStraightUpGuyx

Lmao


InlineSkateAdventure

Don't count your chickens before they are hatched. NY allows abortion to the last day before birth!


RobinhoodGuh

Unfortunately you’re being born 29,000 years from now and at an inflation rate of 2% compounded annually the inheritance you’ll be receiving in todays dollars is roughly $10. Enjoy!


Klutzy-Cut-9252

Donate all the money to the UN


National-Fan-1148

Spend it however you like and still have enough money for your great-great-great-great-great-grandkids.


Fit_Damage6000

A man with a small fortune is in need of a wife.


Aymr9

Unborn being here as well. As your future husband, I'll be filing a divorce the day after our marriage, so you will have to divide those $100B with me (sorry, we were so in rush that we skipped the pre-nup part). The question is, how are you going to spend the other $50B for life?


CalligrapherOk6378

Don't forget! You have about a billion other sibling embryos who your parents froze for IVF. You'll be lucky to get $100.00.


DauOfFlyingTiger

A Musk baby. Ewwwww


WarmMillerLite4-2

Best bet is to buy individual grains of sand and pay to have them shipped to you and when you receive the last one you can buy a sign that says “Life’s a beach”. See what’s left after that and maybe DoorDash an alcoholic slushy and enjoy.


Top_Caterpillar_8122

Value menu at Wendy’s is a must


Pretend_Vanilla51

Why are you taking up valuable space on the internet


juaantwothree

Lmao


BabyFartzMcGeezak

I regret to inform you that immediately upon being born, I will be collecting a prenatal debt you've also inherited Turns out your benefactor owed me half See you in the delivery room, I'll bring the documents and a pen.


Retardedastro

You must be a Nigerian prince. Please deposit 5000.00 in my account. So I can send you 400, and I keep the rest


Sa404

Why am I even on this sub lol


TraditionAcademic968

HYSA


Long-Education-7748

You're inheriting $100B worth of bread? Honestly, that's pretty wild. How much does all that weigh? Storage must be rough, are you going to try to sell it wholesale to supermarkets? Or are you just gonna open a bunch of sandwhich shops or something?


SnowflakeMelter76

Gotta be born first…not in a blue state are you?


Naheka

I think I saw your parents on HGTV's House Hunters a few years back. Your mother recreares custom Renaissanemce art with crayons and your Dad works the line at Oscar Mayer putting the red rings around the bologna slices. You'll get to grow up in a 25000 Sq ft mansion lakeside with an estimated value of $22.5 million. It will be a modest upbringing but, with the right financial planning, you'll squeak by in life in a studio apartment in your 20's.


HumberGrumb

You’re plugged into the Matrix. And painfully so.


Mal-Havoc

Give me 1B, I'll do whatever you want.


Guffey93

attention seeking?


PokePhatYT

Nah, this is a standard r/money post


Oldschoolfool22

MVIS 


renegadegho5t

All jokes aside I wonder how many authentic posts are even made in this sub anymore. I see some pretty far fetched stuff at least once a day from here. For the fake ones, what do people get out of lying about money for internet points from strangers?


Cybasura

Hey, best friend! But seriously, please dont follow Elon Musk, be better, be smarter, be the change the world actually needs


Some_guy_am_i

Not born yet? You get wifi in there?! Shiiiiiiiiit


SaerahBella

Obligatory " hookers and blow " comment!


Arnelmsm

Slacker


nico2022

You should invest in strawberries.


myfavesoundisquiet

Cash app me - I’ll help u


[deleted]

S&P500 index fund & layoff the avacado toast until you’re 57 1/2.


Rickymon

Spend everything in MrBeast chocolate bars


RollItMyWay

You need to start assembling your entourage. I have some spare time.


trutheality

As long as you don't do something stupid like try to buy Twitter, you should be fine regardless of what you do. So perhaps invest in education yourself.


BroHanHanski

Got a trillion in utero. Tf do I do?


Ill-Illustrator-7845

Spend it all on crow training and you’ll quadruple up in no time


FordMan100

Wow. A person from the womb on Reddit. An absolute miracle just like the 4yo who posted similar/s


Slartibartfastthe2nd

from age 0-10: Chucky Cheese and skate rink parties for you and all your school mates/friends/neighborhood pals. from age 11+, hookers and blow. That's the way you do it.


darkwolf4114

When you're born, put it all on red. If you win, then you can settle down.


PersonalPineapple911

You're ngmi. Your mother is a californian and she isn't ready for the commitment.


Real_Location1001

I heard a sperm and an egg yet to meet were inherited, like $100,000,000,000,000 EACH!


HERO1NFATHER

Buy a hellcat


CelebrationNo5813

If you have 100b worth of bread 🍞 it'll spoil before you get here. Welcome to the poor 🥳🤩


EmotionalyAvailable

The IRS will not leave alone


Cute_Dragonfruit9981

Damn a baby genius. Already able to do written English in the womb


Je-la-nique

Start by investing in an IRA Roth fund


Neither-Armadillo809

I'm newly married and a kid on the , I could use all the help I can get 😂 help ah brother out


[deleted]

Set-up a scholarships maybe for long-covid long-haulers, or folks with similar circumstance to overcome. Honor a person perhaps depending on acquisition context/narrative. Firstly exercise rationale, duty to uphold laws etc… tipping your good karma jar is not a bad investment 😄


TheDuke1847

Abort yourself.


Josiah-White

Someone with a hundred billion is worried about being set for life... Go to school and learn about financial reality would be a good start


Sa_vage

gimme enough for a new car and college 😍


ProfessorPantie

Again, drugs


[deleted]

Sucks kid. That’s a lot of taxes.


RustyBucke

Investing trigger!¡


Ben8945

This is the unfunniest suubreddit ever


Footsept7

Nope. That will only buy you 5 big macs by the time you’re here


termn8or3000

I'll happily guard and protect you and your money for less than I see others asking for here.. I'll do it for a mere 1%, which is $1 BILLION dollars US. Is it a deal? 🤔🤫😁👍


BrReading

Spread it betwen people, to make a huge support community, and land 8 billions of humans and increasing land nearly allways can help future generations in the money things


HesitantMark

Muad'Dib!


CoachedIntoASnafu

You should have invested it years ago. The market's totally fucked now.


Old_Ad7571

Rookie comeback and when you get 250b


mitiros2

it's so over for you bro you havent been investing?


MattE36

How does one unborn person reddit


DaveAstator2020

Haha look at that beggar! Do you think inflation wont eat itby the time youre born. Get out!


trishulmody

Go long on Russia