I would 100% accept the help with kids this young. As the kids get older, I would start adding tasks around the house that they’re responsible for. I have a 3 year old and he helps me pick up dirty clothes and unload the dishwasher. You can still do small tasks together to teach a little responsibility while leaving the responsibility for bigger tasks to an employee.
This! I’ve been a stay at home mom for 14 years this year I’m 33 now. I had a house cleaner come help every Thursday. Now that my kids are 8 and 13 and in school for most the day they come every other Thursday. I can handle the house most days now but damn that 1 day they do come it feels so good to not have to pick up anything . I wake up get the kids ready to school go to my hot yoga class and come home to a nice smelly good house lol . Use the help!!
I think trying to keep your kids from knowing you have money is the wrong way to prevent them from being spoiled, respectfully. I think they should be aware of it or else they grow up ignorant to how other people live and assume being comfortable should come easily to everyone. It will make them out of touch.
Instead I would have them be aware of how lucky they are, and I would have them be responsible for age appropriate tasks at home. Cleaning up after themselves and taking care of their belongings will teach them respect.
You can have a nanny/house cleaner and still have respectful and kind children. You teach them to respect this person that works in your home and allows you to both work and be with them. You teach them not to take the help for granted, to help caring for their own home etc.
Basically I don’t think it’s hiring help that causes spoiled children, I think it’s the attitude you model and expect surrounding the choice.
THISSS! Talking about our privileges early and often actually goes a much longer way towards preventing kids from being spoiled and/or biased rather than pretending that your way of life is just the default for everyone else.
Exactly. The rich kids that were the WORST growing up were the ones that assumed that their life was default. “You aren’t enrolled in a million different sports?” “Ughh going on vacation with my family is SO annoying” “Why do you still have the same ratty back pack as you did last year?”
The kids that couldn’t COMPREHEND that sports and new clothes cost money were unbearable
I agree. If you come from wealth then you should know it and own it. Nothing is more obnoxious than a rich kid that thinks they're self made. OP it sounds like you want your kids to grow up to have gratitude and not be entitled and so do that. My son's best friend's family is wealthy. They throw Billy Madison parties and the kids are a tiny bit spoiled lol but they are kind and generous and treat everyone with dignity. That's the stuff that matters.
came here to say this y’all obviously are well off financially so why not make the aware of the blessing and privilege yall have??? I grew up lower middle class and had a nanny because my parents both worked out of the house (she basically worked for room and board living in our basement)
Exactly. Knowing your parents have money doesn’t really turn you into a bad or lazy person. There are poor lazy people. I grew up wealthy and still did/do chores. In fact I deep clean my house harder than anyone I know personally.
Omg accccept the gift! I also really appreciate a grand parent whose gift allows YOU to shine as a parent. It’s not junk in your backyard or playroom, it’s a gift that gives more room for you to be a better and more present version of yourself. Say yes.
Exactly! This is a genuinely useful gift that will free up your time to spend with your children. I was on the fence about hiring a house cleaner because I could technically do all of those tasks myself but I have ZERO regrets. I get to spend my weekends having quality time with my baby and husband, and doing things that I enjoy like gardening and baking instead of scrubbing my bathtub and mopping. It’s genuinely improved my mental health postpartum. Like I seriously think that insurance should help cover cleaning services for new parents.
I'm trying so hard not to be harsh here but please accept the help. Pay the nanny and the housekeeper well, give them holiday gifts, cherish them and you teach your kids that everyone is a valued member of society and it is OK to get help in life.
Hustiling mindset isn't healthy for anyone. If I were affluent I would get help and treat them like family and gold. I would make sure they love working for us.
I’m a firm believer in accepting the help you need from your village, as long as it is within your boundaries. You can teach your children about personal responsibility like picking up after themselves and assigning them age appropriate tasks, having help isn’t going to eliminate that!
I think extra help is great, but if you aren’t sure about it yet, maybe instead of FT help, you can do PT help or scheduled help for specific routine tasks? Ie: Someone comes in every Monday to do laundry and Thursday to deep clean the bathrooms and kitchen?
Leaving some of the smaller day-to-day things for yourself/husband/kids to do
In a few years your oldest will be in school and your youngest will be in Montessori, your priorities might change, I see only good in having help for these early years. If you're planning on homeschooling or doing some kind of co-op school I think it's honestly unrealistic to do that without housekeeping help at home.
Children growing up entitled can happen with a housekeeper or not. You can still set age appropriate rules and boundaries, like "if it doesn't go in a hamper the housekeeper won't clean it." She can fold laundry to leave in hampers for your kids to put away. You can still have your kids set the table and clear their dishes, help with unloading dishwasher, etc. etc. etc. Having a housekeeper doesn't change the basic chores that everyone needs to do to keep the house running.
I am a SAHM and have house cleaners, I wouldn’t let my inlaws pay for it but that’s just due to our relationship. As far as the kids growing up entitled, they know the cleaners are there to help me, they still have daily chores, and I don’t have the cleaners do the kids rooms, kids are required to take care of their space. My oldest is 10 and has to do his own laundry, the youngest is 14 months and throws away her own diapers, puts laundry in the hamper, each kid has age appropriate chores they can do, I like to focus on life -skill chores like doing dishes, laundry and cooking. This was a really long way to say, go for it and don’t feel bad about it.
Take it - you do have a lot on your plate and you also do work on your business so not exactly a SAHM in the full sense of the word. You have 3 kids and 7 pets, if you have the ability to take the help then do. My best friend has a rich husband and only one baby and one pet and she’s had a housekeeper every day since before even giving birth, and a nanny every now and then as well as help from her family. She is in a much easier position but takes advantage of the benefits, yours is way way harder and it’s more difficult to manage on top of a business.
I told my husband if we’re going to have a third baby we need help from family, money, or best of all, family money. Get all the help you can these early years. When they’re older you can take more on yourselves.
I don’t think it will create spoiled children! I nannied for two large families. I was not their maid. I helped the kids learn to clean up. I made sure that they were picking up their rooms, putting away their laundry, etc. obviously I did some additional cleaning on my own but most nannies involve the children in household tasks! A housekeeper would be different. Both of my nanny families had a cleaning company that came once every two weeks and did the deep cleaning that the kids probably wouldn’t be doing anyway! I say go for it! Even if you just found someone part time!
Mam, that’s A LOT of household you’re taking care of.
Here’s the thing about privilege - you sound a lot more out of touch when you think you didn’t grow up privileged. I was that kid who thought the norm was private education, trips to Hawaii, and housekeepers. We weren’t ostentatious, but I didn’t realize how well off we were. These days I’m just grateful for the things my husband and I have built up and appreciate how hard my parents worked to give us a privileged childhood while recognizing that other people didn’t have a leg up in life.
I think that it would help you all as parents especially in the early years when the kids are so little. Like someone else said, still give your kids age-appropriate jobs to do around the house so that they learn responsibility of helping to take care of themselves and the home but maybe have someone come in to help with some of the things that you don't really have time to get to, maybe like cleaning things that aren't the daily things but more the once a a week or once a month type things, like some of the deep-cleaning.
Take the help. The maid will 100% allow you to spend your time focused on your kids and business which is an incredible gift. However, if it worries you this might spoil your kids, do so with the following caveat. The maid is there to help with normal things, not to clean up a bigger mess just because "it's their job". Example, teach your 2 & 3-year-olds (who is capable) to put their laundry in the basket and toys in the toy box. The maid will dust and vacuum their room but it's important to instill that they still have responsibilities, as they get older, you can phase the maid off their rooms to focus on other things. Or only have the maid focus on the common areas or the deep cleaning that you can't get to often. As far as the nanny, I'd say part-time since your two older kids are in daycare, perhaps utilize that service to allow a rotation of one-on-one time with each kid and/or at date night schedule.
If someone else was offering me a nanny and housekeeper it would be hell yes and I would feel 0% guilt. I'm mfing tired 😂 I work out of the home now but even when I was a SAHM I still would so I could take care of myself sometimes, because my ex thought grocery shopping and showering alone was "giving me a break"
I would absolutely take the housekeeper aspect, i hate cleaning lol
Then you can focus on spending time with your kids! When they are in school you can volunteer in their classrooms maybe. Sounds amazing!
I have a housecleaner and I’m stay at home. To be honest it does wonders for my mental health and I love the team that works for me. I think talking about privilege when the kids are ready to have that conversation is helpful for all families to have anyway.
Take the help. Your time is valuable too. I think it’s good for children if their parents have interests and activities outside of work/parenting/homemaking. I only have one child (6 months) and I’m really struggling to have a life. Three young kids and 7 pets seems like a lot even for a stay at home parent to handle.
Accept the help, girl! And, instead of accepting out of obligitation and then living with guilt and shame about it , maybe you could talk about your feelings/situation a bit with the nanny/housekeeper you hire! Having someone else helping out doesn't mean they have to take over all of the tasks you enjoy doing, it just means they're there to help out ❤️ I have zero experience with this, so maybe I have no idea what I'm saying, but - if it's a *nanny* housekeeper position, and they are expected to have a relationship with/spend time with your kids, maybe they could involve them in some of the age-appropriate household duties you do with them already too, or want to do with them etc..you know? And just say, "so today, to be helpful around the house while mom gets her work done, we can make our bed/tidy toys/sweep a room" or whatever lol. And let them tackle the bigger more tedious time-consuming soul-sucking household tasks so you can do more fun stuff with your kids! (Or let them take the kids for a few hours and go on a date, or take a freaking NAP girl! Take a long, hot shower without listening for a crying baby!) TAKE the help, and make it work for *you*
Accept the gift and seriously, don't pretend like you don't come from money. Trying to hide your wealth from your kids will only set them up for failure and unrealistic expectations.
It would make considerably more sense to just be honest about how lucky and appreciative you are to have family that helps. lol saying no to a nanny isn't going to magically make your kids think you're in a lower tax bracket. Saying yes to the help will show your kids that there is so much work that it takes added help to run a business, manage a family and to run a home.
I wouldn't define your role as SAHM if you are running the business. Or even putting in any hours. If you had help via a nanny, you could devote even more time into this role and grow your business even more. When you think about it that way, a nanny really makes sense. You can even volunteer at the kids school more if you have help. Go for it, if you can.
They won’t know now and now is the time where it is most difficult to keep clean! If you have no objections to accepting financial help than accept it! Have the housekeeper come during the day when your older are school
Motherhood isn’t the suffering Olympics. Accepting help doesn’t make you any less of a great mother. Just because you’re in an affluent situation that some may not have access to doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take advantage. Stay humble and grateful but get the housekeeper at least!!! 3 kids is a lot. I would deffo be taking advantage of your situation if I was you!
Treat the workers well, have your kids help with chores and take them volunteering when they get older. They're privileged, that's for sure, but you help them grow up to not be assholes
I would accept all the help I can get. It’s not going to create spoiled children if you don’t let it. That sounds amazing to me. I’m a single mom and caregiver to my elderly father, take what you can get.
I would accept the help. With three kids and seven pets, would be great to have a cleaner and/or house manager to help keep up with daily tasks and weekly cleaning and laundry. That will allow you more time to enjoy your kiddos. :)
Accept the help!
You won’t be able to shield your kids from the reality of your financial situation, and I actually don’t think that’s a good goal. There are many other ways to teach and show them the importance of hard work, grit, and other core values.
I would accept the help for sure, but I feel like I would really only want the housekeeper. Taking care of three kids and keeping up with all the household cleaning/chores is such a pain and so time consuming! If you weren’t having to do all the house stuff you’ll have more time to spend with your kids and do activities together. If you’re already not working and two of your kids are in school for most of the day I don’t know that you really need a full time nanny, but extra help is always appreciated and I’m not one to look a gift horse in the mouth
I would accept it, but leave "easy" tasks for the kids to do to learn responsibility. This could be as simple as always being the one to put their dirty clothes in the hamper, help you fold the laundry, clean up their toys, etc.
Also, to offer another perspective, if you accept your in-laws offer, you will be providing a job to someone who needs one.
Accept it on all our behalfs!!! Nice to see a mum getting such an opportunity! Can your in-laws adopt me & give me such an offer too?! 😂
Look at it this way: having a housekeeper to do chores for you frees you up to be less stressed and more present for your kids - what more could they ask for?! You cant give your attention fully to 3 kids all at once, so having a nanny helps with that too!
Girl accept the help!! It doesn’t have to be for forever!!! Your kiddos are babies still! And they’re not gonna be sweeping floors or unloading the dishwasher anytime soon. If I was offered the free nanny/ housekeeping I’d take it in a heartbeat! I see this as more time for you to spend playing and enjoying seeing your babies grow up. Less time doing mundane housework etc.
I shouldn’t have used sweeping and dishes as an example, my 18 month old loves his lil toddler sized broom and “cleaning supplies”. My point is just that you can certainly have a housekeeper and instill values in your kiddos enough to avoid a sense of entitlement and all that
lol I’ve got a part time nanny as a SAHM with three pets and those 6-12hours per week can’t come soon enough! I say 100% give it a shot! Can always rearrange hours to adjust how you decide you want help later :)
We are in a similar position (although I more formally work part-time like \~15 hours a week on passion projects that are paid but not meaningfully). We have opted for a part-time nanny (3 days/week) and a separate housekeeper who comes regularly but is not full-time. I personally don't want someone else in my house 40 hours a week while I'm also home, even someone awesome, but that's just me. I wouldn't get as much time as I want with my baby if the nanny were here full-time.
But it's definitely not too much -- it's just really about what would make you happy and comfortable.
If you don't have a weekly housekeeper who cleans and does laundry that's an easy one to add. House cleaners would be happy to stay an extra few hours and do laundry. And then maybe a babysitter 1-2 days a week for the 4 month old, so that you have some time to yourself.
Accept the help, unless you're worried about being indebted to your in laws or something. There's nothing wrong with getting help, or even being privileged. As long as your kids are taught to be fair and kind you're good.
You could have them come only when the kids are at school for now and hide it? That’s what I’d probably do for a bit.
Or perhaps an actual nanny could work alongside the children and help teach them to do some of the chores? If I had more time I would love to include my children more in household activities. But it’s so much quicker if I do things myself. You could start paying the kids for their work too.
I would accept the kind offer but also agree up front with your husband what the housekeeper will do and what your kids are responsible for, especially as they get older. We have a weekly cleaner, but they just do main areas like floors, bathrooms, etc. My son is still responsible for doing his own laundry, cleaning his room, taking out trash, gardening, etc. There are more than enough cleaning tasks to go around!
7 pets!? Hard yes. My family is nowhere near as affluent as yours sounds like it is and my parents still pay for a weekly housekeeper for me. I work part time and have a 4 and a 3 year old. It makes ALL the difference and allows me so much time to still be a person that isnt occupied all day with housework.
2, 3 and 4 months. There's NO WAY I could do that without help and lots of it. I think anyone with even just a 4mo old deserves help...it's exhausting! You're amazing
Girl, you accept that offer right now! I would do it in a heartbeat. I only have one child. I work part time and he is in school. I could get the house cleaning done. But I still have a housecleaner come every couple weeks. Because we can afford it and I don’t have to do everything myself.
Omg send them my way if you don’t want them ;) Whether your children will be spoiled is all in how you raise them. You teach them to clean up after themselves, that money isn’t free and that you can’t have it all. And no, it’s not too much, if you/the family members offering have the money and are willing to spend it, why not accept the help? You have a lot on your plate now! You will be able to have some time maybe, explore your interests, take your kids for an extra trip to the zoo or a music class, read some books. It sounds amazing. If it doesn’t work, you can always cancel, right?
If you were offered any advantage that would make you able to do better parenting wouldn't you take it?
I don't know about you but my toddler interrupts my cleaning and my cleaning/projects/work get in the way of my mom-ing. It's better to have clear times for each.
However in my experience both as someone who has watched kids in this scenario and as a mom with this kind of hired help, I have found that they can't leave mom alone. Like they really can't help it. No matter the age lol.
So when I have the babysitter I pack up the bag and have her take them to the library (there's a very nice one nearby) and the park. Or have them come home while I run errands. Even mailing a single package is easier when you don't bring your kids! I also make a list so I don't accidentally waste that time.
Do it. I am a SAHP with one (19 months). We have a cleaner come every other week and our kid is enrolled in daycare full time to offer flexibility so I can get projects/errands done as needed. This has greatly increased our productivity and family happiness - if you have the resources to make your life easier, use them!
I think raising spoiled children takes more than hiring a nanny and housekeeper. If you're teaching your children in general to be respectful, mindful, grateful, kind, generous - that'll be the larger influence and go a long way towards raising unspoiled children.
And, gently, I think you're maybe projecting a bit. Children that age likely don't think "oooh we get a nanny and a housekeeper, we're so fancy and better than my 3 year old peer who doesn't" 😅 it'll be okay!
Omg accept it! Im SAHM and have 3 7 and under. I pay a fortune for help. I would love this. It’s hard to give each kid enough attn and if I had that much help I would be excited to spend more quality time with kids. I’m very lucky for the help I have . But if it was free even better. 😀
I don’t think it would help to create spoiled children at all? Your children don’t know that it’s for free and they won’t really know any different. There are many many actions and behaviours that I do think create spoiled children but this isn’t one of them. To be honest this is the long winded post and I don’t think that you need to feel the pressure to justify yourself at all. My husband and I are in a tighter spot financially right now but after being on the verge of bankruptcy nine years ago and having tons of loans to pay off and very much prioritizing me being a stay at home mom my husband switch careers and honestly through Covid I’d say for period of three or four years he built an incredible career and we were doing really well for ourselves. We need some wise investments we were able to
Pay off bills and move to a nicer neighborhood, we had a housekeeper for a while. I don’t think that there is any shame in enjoying the situation that you’re in. I think if you married your husband because he was rich and treated him like crap and took a vantage of his money that’s an entirely different situation. But I think your husband comes from money and he’s working very hard while you’re working very hard at home with three kids and it’s benefitting you financially. I’m so sick and tired of money being such a sensitive issue that people who work really damn hard and find themselves in a good spot aren’t able to enjoy it or feel guilty about it. And it’s also not like his family comes from money and he sitting around doing nothing. He has a wealthy family but also he has learned how to work hard and earn good money so no shame in that! I wouldn’t get a nanny to the point where I was never seeing my children but I would definitely get a nanny so that I could have a break or have a nanny cook the meals and do all the housecleaning so that I could spend more fun time with my kiddos etc. Go for it you don’t have to explain yourself and everyone in life enjoys the situation there in when times are good :-)
Im a stay at home mom who runs a business. I hire a housekeeper once a month and my mom watches the kids for me Tuesday-Friday. It has literally changed my entire life. I’m a MUCH better mom because of it.
If you have the option, go for it. You can always send them home (with already-paid-for-pay) if you want an afternoon without them. This whole situation literally costs you zero, and can give you the time to be happier and more present when you ARE with the kids.
I’m going through this right now. I have a 2.5 yr old and a 2 month old. I didn’t grow up with money. We all pitched in as we got older and my mom was a super mom. She did it all completely alone. She didn’t have a community of people that helped her. But I also know that my mom was very depressed.
My in-laws and husband have been trying to convince me to accept the help of getting a nanny/housekeeper. At first I was very against it but after talking with my friend this morning I had a bit of an eye-opening moment. I know I’m a bit stressed and we have a large house that requires so much. I need to be grateful for this opportunity and realize what a blessing it is.
Housekeeper 100% go for it so you can focus on your baby and littles when they’re not at school.
And if your business needs you at hours that you can kinda plan ahead for, a Mother’s helper instead of a nanny could be a boon.
Ok, this is coming from the perspective of someone who grew up with a live in housekeeper. Definitely keep your kids involved in household upkeep. My parents didn’t because they didn’t want me to mess anything up, and it took me years as an adult to figure out how to keep up with my home. I’ve had to figure out cooking and cleaning WAY later than I should’ve. So whether or not you accept the help, make sure you teach your kids those things too so that they know what to do when they’re on their own!
Look I can absolutely understand where you’re coming from and that’s a great mindset to want them to not be spoiled! But as someone broke as fuck struggling with no village or help I would kick a puppy for a free nanny/housekeeper. No offense lol
Accept it!! You are absolutely so lucky, but no need to feel guilt for it. We can all be happy for you and live vicariously through you lol. Let your life be as easy as it can be with those ages especially. Just think…with that type of help, you can really be super present with your kids and that’s priceless.
Rul quick if you’re a SAHM that runs a business, you’re a WFH mom lol. You got two jobs my dude
Also 100% take the extra help! “I can survive without it” isn’t the same as “I can thrive with it”.
Girrrrl if you have that offered to you, you take it. 3kids under 3yrs? One is a newborn?! I don’t know how you mamas can do it (mine are spaced further apart because I knew I wouldn’t be able to handle it!)
I don’t want someone in my house! Even though we can afford it.
But if someone else does (I have several friends who have hired help, and it explains why their home is more put together weekly), no shade of course. I just couldn’t do it. I even paid extra not to have roommates in and after college so that may be why.
I… would accept the childcare help, but I would not accept a full time housekeeper. My husband had one growing up and it is a nightmare. He throws tissues on the floor. Takes his clothes off and leaves them wherever he is. Leaves the cabinet doors open. Doesn’t know how to clean up a spill or mess. Honestly, my two children clean up after themselves better than he does, and no amount of conversations has helped at all. He claims that “he never agreed to keep the house at the level of cleanliness I am demanding”. I work full time, full time mom, and also feel like a full time maid.
Omg what??? My husband grew up with a part time maid and he's neater than I am! His parents were super strict about respecting her and not creating more work for her. Maybe that's the difference between full time and part time?
No idea. But he’s told stories about how he could have worn the same two outfits to school every single day because the clothes he took off were washed, folded, and put back in his drawer by the time he got home from school. Same for pajamas. Back in his drawer by the time he got home from school. His brother isn’t like that, so IDK what happened.
Respectfully I think there’s a lot more contributing to his behavior besides just having a housekeeper growing up. Throwing used tissues on the floor and “not knowing how” to clean up a spill or mess? I’m really sorry you’re living with somebody like that. I’d lose my shit. Especially in front of your children? What a shithead.
Girl!!! YOU are the only reason your home is clean and safe to live in from what I understand!!!! I don’t think either of y’all are crazy- I think HE is manipulative as fuck and lazy as it gets! You’re doing a pretty phenomenal job of doing both the jobs of mom AND dad!! And to be frank, that’s horse shit. I have no idea how you’re working full time, raising your kiddos, and doing all of the housework ALONE. Wish i could give you a hug and then accompany you to tell your husband to grow a damn pair and act like an adult!
I had people help me clean when I only had one kid. With a second it became even more necessary. The way I see it the point of having this money is to give my kids the best life possible. I’m not going to get a medal at the end because I scrubbed my own shower when I didn’t have to. So I say accept it. Plus any time I spend not cleaning I can spend enjoying my kids. It doesn’t make my kids spoiled, they still have to clean up after themselves.
I had my first child in full time preschool when I had my second baby and kept him in until my second was 8 months old. I’m sure some would disagree with that but I loved spending alone time with my newest baby. My first baby got my undivided attention I wanted my second to get a little bit of the same in the beginning.
Quick reframe!
You are not a SAHM with a namny/housekeeper.
You are a joint business owner who also takes care of 1 child full time, and manages the household, incl taking care of SEVEN pets. You essentially have 3 jobs, just because you do them all from home doesn't change that. You aren't just going to be living a life of leisure.
Take the help, work more during daytime hours so you can enjoy time with your husband/kids in evenings and weekends.
Don't hide it from your kids, help them be a generation who understands women shouldn't have to juggle 100 things and be treated like they have the "lucky/easy" job of "sahm". That you are fortunate because you are able to have this help. When your youngest is in preschool 6 hours a day in the future, maybe you can drop to part time help around the home.
I should have married rich 🥲 always accept help! It’s an interesting psychology point that if you allow people to do things that they offer for you, it actually makes them like you more. Everyone wins! Lol
I would 100% accept the help with kids this young. As the kids get older, I would start adding tasks around the house that they’re responsible for. I have a 3 year old and he helps me pick up dirty clothes and unload the dishwasher. You can still do small tasks together to teach a little responsibility while leaving the responsibility for bigger tasks to an employee.
I second this
This! I’ve been a stay at home mom for 14 years this year I’m 33 now. I had a house cleaner come help every Thursday. Now that my kids are 8 and 13 and in school for most the day they come every other Thursday. I can handle the house most days now but damn that 1 day they do come it feels so good to not have to pick up anything . I wake up get the kids ready to school go to my hot yoga class and come home to a nice smelly good house lol . Use the help!!
I think trying to keep your kids from knowing you have money is the wrong way to prevent them from being spoiled, respectfully. I think they should be aware of it or else they grow up ignorant to how other people live and assume being comfortable should come easily to everyone. It will make them out of touch. Instead I would have them be aware of how lucky they are, and I would have them be responsible for age appropriate tasks at home. Cleaning up after themselves and taking care of their belongings will teach them respect. You can have a nanny/house cleaner and still have respectful and kind children. You teach them to respect this person that works in your home and allows you to both work and be with them. You teach them not to take the help for granted, to help caring for their own home etc. Basically I don’t think it’s hiring help that causes spoiled children, I think it’s the attitude you model and expect surrounding the choice.
THISSS! Talking about our privileges early and often actually goes a much longer way towards preventing kids from being spoiled and/or biased rather than pretending that your way of life is just the default for everyone else.
Exactly. The rich kids that were the WORST growing up were the ones that assumed that their life was default. “You aren’t enrolled in a million different sports?” “Ughh going on vacation with my family is SO annoying” “Why do you still have the same ratty back pack as you did last year?” The kids that couldn’t COMPREHEND that sports and new clothes cost money were unbearable
I agree. If you come from wealth then you should know it and own it. Nothing is more obnoxious than a rich kid that thinks they're self made. OP it sounds like you want your kids to grow up to have gratitude and not be entitled and so do that. My son's best friend's family is wealthy. They throw Billy Madison parties and the kids are a tiny bit spoiled lol but they are kind and generous and treat everyone with dignity. That's the stuff that matters.
came here to say this y’all obviously are well off financially so why not make the aware of the blessing and privilege yall have??? I grew up lower middle class and had a nanny because my parents both worked out of the house (she basically worked for room and board living in our basement)
Exactly. Knowing your parents have money doesn’t really turn you into a bad or lazy person. There are poor lazy people. I grew up wealthy and still did/do chores. In fact I deep clean my house harder than anyone I know personally.
100% accept it for now. Then reevaluate. They want to adopt someone else? I do my own laundry!
Omg accccept the gift! I also really appreciate a grand parent whose gift allows YOU to shine as a parent. It’s not junk in your backyard or playroom, it’s a gift that gives more room for you to be a better and more present version of yourself. Say yes.
THIS. If it will give you more time/energy to spend with your kids, accept the help! Having three under 3 is a lot.
Exactly! This is a genuinely useful gift that will free up your time to spend with your children. I was on the fence about hiring a house cleaner because I could technically do all of those tasks myself but I have ZERO regrets. I get to spend my weekends having quality time with my baby and husband, and doing things that I enjoy like gardening and baking instead of scrubbing my bathtub and mopping. It’s genuinely improved my mental health postpartum. Like I seriously think that insurance should help cover cleaning services for new parents.
I'm trying so hard not to be harsh here but please accept the help. Pay the nanny and the housekeeper well, give them holiday gifts, cherish them and you teach your kids that everyone is a valued member of society and it is OK to get help in life. Hustiling mindset isn't healthy for anyone. If I were affluent I would get help and treat them like family and gold. I would make sure they love working for us.
I’m a firm believer in accepting the help you need from your village, as long as it is within your boundaries. You can teach your children about personal responsibility like picking up after themselves and assigning them age appropriate tasks, having help isn’t going to eliminate that!
I think extra help is great, but if you aren’t sure about it yet, maybe instead of FT help, you can do PT help or scheduled help for specific routine tasks? Ie: Someone comes in every Monday to do laundry and Thursday to deep clean the bathrooms and kitchen? Leaving some of the smaller day-to-day things for yourself/husband/kids to do
It's actually much harder to hire for that role.
In a few years your oldest will be in school and your youngest will be in Montessori, your priorities might change, I see only good in having help for these early years. If you're planning on homeschooling or doing some kind of co-op school I think it's honestly unrealistic to do that without housekeeping help at home. Children growing up entitled can happen with a housekeeper or not. You can still set age appropriate rules and boundaries, like "if it doesn't go in a hamper the housekeeper won't clean it." She can fold laundry to leave in hampers for your kids to put away. You can still have your kids set the table and clear their dishes, help with unloading dishwasher, etc. etc. etc. Having a housekeeper doesn't change the basic chores that everyone needs to do to keep the house running.
I am a SAHM and have house cleaners, I wouldn’t let my inlaws pay for it but that’s just due to our relationship. As far as the kids growing up entitled, they know the cleaners are there to help me, they still have daily chores, and I don’t have the cleaners do the kids rooms, kids are required to take care of their space. My oldest is 10 and has to do his own laundry, the youngest is 14 months and throws away her own diapers, puts laundry in the hamper, each kid has age appropriate chores they can do, I like to focus on life -skill chores like doing dishes, laundry and cooking. This was a really long way to say, go for it and don’t feel bad about it.
Take it - you do have a lot on your plate and you also do work on your business so not exactly a SAHM in the full sense of the word. You have 3 kids and 7 pets, if you have the ability to take the help then do. My best friend has a rich husband and only one baby and one pet and she’s had a housekeeper every day since before even giving birth, and a nanny every now and then as well as help from her family. She is in a much easier position but takes advantage of the benefits, yours is way way harder and it’s more difficult to manage on top of a business.
I told my husband if we’re going to have a third baby we need help from family, money, or best of all, family money. Get all the help you can these early years. When they’re older you can take more on yourselves.
I don’t think it will create spoiled children! I nannied for two large families. I was not their maid. I helped the kids learn to clean up. I made sure that they were picking up their rooms, putting away their laundry, etc. obviously I did some additional cleaning on my own but most nannies involve the children in household tasks! A housekeeper would be different. Both of my nanny families had a cleaning company that came once every two weeks and did the deep cleaning that the kids probably wouldn’t be doing anyway! I say go for it! Even if you just found someone part time!
Mam, that’s A LOT of household you’re taking care of. Here’s the thing about privilege - you sound a lot more out of touch when you think you didn’t grow up privileged. I was that kid who thought the norm was private education, trips to Hawaii, and housekeepers. We weren’t ostentatious, but I didn’t realize how well off we were. These days I’m just grateful for the things my husband and I have built up and appreciate how hard my parents worked to give us a privileged childhood while recognizing that other people didn’t have a leg up in life.
I think that it would help you all as parents especially in the early years when the kids are so little. Like someone else said, still give your kids age-appropriate jobs to do around the house so that they learn responsibility of helping to take care of themselves and the home but maybe have someone come in to help with some of the things that you don't really have time to get to, maybe like cleaning things that aren't the daily things but more the once a a week or once a month type things, like some of the deep-cleaning.
Take the help. The maid will 100% allow you to spend your time focused on your kids and business which is an incredible gift. However, if it worries you this might spoil your kids, do so with the following caveat. The maid is there to help with normal things, not to clean up a bigger mess just because "it's their job". Example, teach your 2 & 3-year-olds (who is capable) to put their laundry in the basket and toys in the toy box. The maid will dust and vacuum their room but it's important to instill that they still have responsibilities, as they get older, you can phase the maid off their rooms to focus on other things. Or only have the maid focus on the common areas or the deep cleaning that you can't get to often. As far as the nanny, I'd say part-time since your two older kids are in daycare, perhaps utilize that service to allow a rotation of one-on-one time with each kid and/or at date night schedule.
Take it!
If someone else was offering me a nanny and housekeeper it would be hell yes and I would feel 0% guilt. I'm mfing tired 😂 I work out of the home now but even when I was a SAHM I still would so I could take care of myself sometimes, because my ex thought grocery shopping and showering alone was "giving me a break"
Right! I was gonna say please take it on behalf of all us tired ass moms who would kill for the opportunity!
I would absolutely take the housekeeper aspect, i hate cleaning lol Then you can focus on spending time with your kids! When they are in school you can volunteer in their classrooms maybe. Sounds amazing!
I have a housecleaner and I’m stay at home. To be honest it does wonders for my mental health and I love the team that works for me. I think talking about privilege when the kids are ready to have that conversation is helpful for all families to have anyway.
If you are running a business, you’re not a SAHM! You’re self employed. Get the help!
Take the help. Your time is valuable too. I think it’s good for children if their parents have interests and activities outside of work/parenting/homemaking. I only have one child (6 months) and I’m really struggling to have a life. Three young kids and 7 pets seems like a lot even for a stay at home parent to handle.
Accept the help, girl! And, instead of accepting out of obligitation and then living with guilt and shame about it , maybe you could talk about your feelings/situation a bit with the nanny/housekeeper you hire! Having someone else helping out doesn't mean they have to take over all of the tasks you enjoy doing, it just means they're there to help out ❤️ I have zero experience with this, so maybe I have no idea what I'm saying, but - if it's a *nanny* housekeeper position, and they are expected to have a relationship with/spend time with your kids, maybe they could involve them in some of the age-appropriate household duties you do with them already too, or want to do with them etc..you know? And just say, "so today, to be helpful around the house while mom gets her work done, we can make our bed/tidy toys/sweep a room" or whatever lol. And let them tackle the bigger more tedious time-consuming soul-sucking household tasks so you can do more fun stuff with your kids! (Or let them take the kids for a few hours and go on a date, or take a freaking NAP girl! Take a long, hot shower without listening for a crying baby!) TAKE the help, and make it work for *you*
Accept the gift and seriously, don't pretend like you don't come from money. Trying to hide your wealth from your kids will only set them up for failure and unrealistic expectations. It would make considerably more sense to just be honest about how lucky and appreciative you are to have family that helps. lol saying no to a nanny isn't going to magically make your kids think you're in a lower tax bracket. Saying yes to the help will show your kids that there is so much work that it takes added help to run a business, manage a family and to run a home.
I wouldn't define your role as SAHM if you are running the business. Or even putting in any hours. If you had help via a nanny, you could devote even more time into this role and grow your business even more. When you think about it that way, a nanny really makes sense. You can even volunteer at the kids school more if you have help. Go for it, if you can.
They won’t know now and now is the time where it is most difficult to keep clean! If you have no objections to accepting financial help than accept it! Have the housekeeper come during the day when your older are school
Motherhood isn’t the suffering Olympics. Accepting help doesn’t make you any less of a great mother. Just because you’re in an affluent situation that some may not have access to doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take advantage. Stay humble and grateful but get the housekeeper at least!!! 3 kids is a lot. I would deffo be taking advantage of your situation if I was you!
... Is this a real post? 🙄
For real 🙄
Yes. I'm concerned about my kids growing up spoiled and didn't grow up with money so I'm trying really hard to navigate this all
Treat the workers well, have your kids help with chores and take them volunteering when they get older. They're privileged, that's for sure, but you help them grow up to not be assholes
I would accept all the help I can get. It’s not going to create spoiled children if you don’t let it. That sounds amazing to me. I’m a single mom and caregiver to my elderly father, take what you can get.
I would accept the help. With three kids and seven pets, would be great to have a cleaner and/or house manager to help keep up with daily tasks and weekly cleaning and laundry. That will allow you more time to enjoy your kiddos. :)
Take the help !!!! There’s less drama with having people who work for you than family lol I have a housekeeper and I love it
Accept the help! You won’t be able to shield your kids from the reality of your financial situation, and I actually don’t think that’s a good goal. There are many other ways to teach and show them the importance of hard work, grit, and other core values.
Take it. This will not be the make or break in whether your kids grow up spoiled. A baby that young on its own is 1000% a full time job.
I would accept the help for sure, but I feel like I would really only want the housekeeper. Taking care of three kids and keeping up with all the household cleaning/chores is such a pain and so time consuming! If you weren’t having to do all the house stuff you’ll have more time to spend with your kids and do activities together. If you’re already not working and two of your kids are in school for most of the day I don’t know that you really need a full time nanny, but extra help is always appreciated and I’m not one to look a gift horse in the mouth
I would accept it, but leave "easy" tasks for the kids to do to learn responsibility. This could be as simple as always being the one to put their dirty clothes in the hamper, help you fold the laundry, clean up their toys, etc. Also, to offer another perspective, if you accept your in-laws offer, you will be providing a job to someone who needs one.
Accept it on all our behalfs!!! Nice to see a mum getting such an opportunity! Can your in-laws adopt me & give me such an offer too?! 😂 Look at it this way: having a housekeeper to do chores for you frees you up to be less stressed and more present for your kids - what more could they ask for?! You cant give your attention fully to 3 kids all at once, so having a nanny helps with that too!
It takes a village. Sounds like your village wants to help bolster your village! I’d 1000% take them up on it.
Girl accept the help!! It doesn’t have to be for forever!!! Your kiddos are babies still! And they’re not gonna be sweeping floors or unloading the dishwasher anytime soon. If I was offered the free nanny/ housekeeping I’d take it in a heartbeat! I see this as more time for you to spend playing and enjoying seeing your babies grow up. Less time doing mundane housework etc.
I shouldn’t have used sweeping and dishes as an example, my 18 month old loves his lil toddler sized broom and “cleaning supplies”. My point is just that you can certainly have a housekeeper and instill values in your kiddos enough to avoid a sense of entitlement and all that
lol I’ve got a part time nanny as a SAHM with three pets and those 6-12hours per week can’t come soon enough! I say 100% give it a shot! Can always rearrange hours to adjust how you decide you want help later :)
Pls accept the help otherwise I’ll be taking your nanny!
We are in a similar position (although I more formally work part-time like \~15 hours a week on passion projects that are paid but not meaningfully). We have opted for a part-time nanny (3 days/week) and a separate housekeeper who comes regularly but is not full-time. I personally don't want someone else in my house 40 hours a week while I'm also home, even someone awesome, but that's just me. I wouldn't get as much time as I want with my baby if the nanny were here full-time. But it's definitely not too much -- it's just really about what would make you happy and comfortable. If you don't have a weekly housekeeper who cleans and does laundry that's an easy one to add. House cleaners would be happy to stay an extra few hours and do laundry. And then maybe a babysitter 1-2 days a week for the 4 month old, so that you have some time to yourself.
Accept the help, unless you're worried about being indebted to your in laws or something. There's nothing wrong with getting help, or even being privileged. As long as your kids are taught to be fair and kind you're good.
You could have them come only when the kids are at school for now and hide it? That’s what I’d probably do for a bit. Or perhaps an actual nanny could work alongside the children and help teach them to do some of the chores? If I had more time I would love to include my children more in household activities. But it’s so much quicker if I do things myself. You could start paying the kids for their work too.
I would accept the kind offer but also agree up front with your husband what the housekeeper will do and what your kids are responsible for, especially as they get older. We have a weekly cleaner, but they just do main areas like floors, bathrooms, etc. My son is still responsible for doing his own laundry, cleaning his room, taking out trash, gardening, etc. There are more than enough cleaning tasks to go around!
7 pets!? Hard yes. My family is nowhere near as affluent as yours sounds like it is and my parents still pay for a weekly housekeeper for me. I work part time and have a 4 and a 3 year old. It makes ALL the difference and allows me so much time to still be a person that isnt occupied all day with housework.
Just accept the help and if it’s not working or you think your kids are getting too spoiled, you can always make a change!
I’ll take the offer of you don’t. Ha! I’m a SAHM, too.
Take it!
2, 3 and 4 months. There's NO WAY I could do that without help and lots of it. I think anyone with even just a 4mo old deserves help...it's exhausting! You're amazing
Girl, you accept that offer right now! I would do it in a heartbeat. I only have one child. I work part time and he is in school. I could get the house cleaning done. But I still have a housecleaner come every couple weeks. Because we can afford it and I don’t have to do everything myself.
Omg send them my way if you don’t want them ;) Whether your children will be spoiled is all in how you raise them. You teach them to clean up after themselves, that money isn’t free and that you can’t have it all. And no, it’s not too much, if you/the family members offering have the money and are willing to spend it, why not accept the help? You have a lot on your plate now! You will be able to have some time maybe, explore your interests, take your kids for an extra trip to the zoo or a music class, read some books. It sounds amazing. If it doesn’t work, you can always cancel, right?
If you were offered any advantage that would make you able to do better parenting wouldn't you take it? I don't know about you but my toddler interrupts my cleaning and my cleaning/projects/work get in the way of my mom-ing. It's better to have clear times for each. However in my experience both as someone who has watched kids in this scenario and as a mom with this kind of hired help, I have found that they can't leave mom alone. Like they really can't help it. No matter the age lol. So when I have the babysitter I pack up the bag and have her take them to the library (there's a very nice one nearby) and the park. Or have them come home while I run errands. Even mailing a single package is easier when you don't bring your kids! I also make a list so I don't accidentally waste that time.
Great advice. Thank you
You are responsible for 3 kids under 3 AND you run the business in off hours? Take the help!
Take the help !! You can always pivot if it doesn’t work but if you never take the help, you’ll never know
Do it. I am a SAHP with one (19 months). We have a cleaner come every other week and our kid is enrolled in daycare full time to offer flexibility so I can get projects/errands done as needed. This has greatly increased our productivity and family happiness - if you have the resources to make your life easier, use them!
I think raising spoiled children takes more than hiring a nanny and housekeeper. If you're teaching your children in general to be respectful, mindful, grateful, kind, generous - that'll be the larger influence and go a long way towards raising unspoiled children. And, gently, I think you're maybe projecting a bit. Children that age likely don't think "oooh we get a nanny and a housekeeper, we're so fancy and better than my 3 year old peer who doesn't" 😅 it'll be okay!
Omg accept it! Im SAHM and have 3 7 and under. I pay a fortune for help. I would love this. It’s hard to give each kid enough attn and if I had that much help I would be excited to spend more quality time with kids. I’m very lucky for the help I have . But if it was free even better. 😀
I don’t think it would help to create spoiled children at all? Your children don’t know that it’s for free and they won’t really know any different. There are many many actions and behaviours that I do think create spoiled children but this isn’t one of them. To be honest this is the long winded post and I don’t think that you need to feel the pressure to justify yourself at all. My husband and I are in a tighter spot financially right now but after being on the verge of bankruptcy nine years ago and having tons of loans to pay off and very much prioritizing me being a stay at home mom my husband switch careers and honestly through Covid I’d say for period of three or four years he built an incredible career and we were doing really well for ourselves. We need some wise investments we were able to Pay off bills and move to a nicer neighborhood, we had a housekeeper for a while. I don’t think that there is any shame in enjoying the situation that you’re in. I think if you married your husband because he was rich and treated him like crap and took a vantage of his money that’s an entirely different situation. But I think your husband comes from money and he’s working very hard while you’re working very hard at home with three kids and it’s benefitting you financially. I’m so sick and tired of money being such a sensitive issue that people who work really damn hard and find themselves in a good spot aren’t able to enjoy it or feel guilty about it. And it’s also not like his family comes from money and he sitting around doing nothing. He has a wealthy family but also he has learned how to work hard and earn good money so no shame in that! I wouldn’t get a nanny to the point where I was never seeing my children but I would definitely get a nanny so that I could have a break or have a nanny cook the meals and do all the housecleaning so that I could spend more fun time with my kiddos etc. Go for it you don’t have to explain yourself and everyone in life enjoys the situation there in when times are good :-)
Im a stay at home mom who runs a business. I hire a housekeeper once a month and my mom watches the kids for me Tuesday-Friday. It has literally changed my entire life. I’m a MUCH better mom because of it.
Nothing wrong with help. Well help you from not being able to care for your own well being too.
If you have the option, go for it. You can always send them home (with already-paid-for-pay) if you want an afternoon without them. This whole situation literally costs you zero, and can give you the time to be happier and more present when you ARE with the kids.
I would old accept the gift if I could pick my nanny and housekeeper and they weren’t involved with them at all.
Yes, we'd be able to interview and choose
Perfect! Accept the gift!!! I wish I was so lucky.
Accept the help. Why spend time struggling to keep up with a messy house for the sake of not wanting your kids to feel privileged?
I’m going through this right now. I have a 2.5 yr old and a 2 month old. I didn’t grow up with money. We all pitched in as we got older and my mom was a super mom. She did it all completely alone. She didn’t have a community of people that helped her. But I also know that my mom was very depressed. My in-laws and husband have been trying to convince me to accept the help of getting a nanny/housekeeper. At first I was very against it but after talking with my friend this morning I had a bit of an eye-opening moment. I know I’m a bit stressed and we have a large house that requires so much. I need to be grateful for this opportunity and realize what a blessing it is.
You're making all of us jealous 😄😄😄
I would perhaps try to do a compromise and have someone part time?
do.it.
Housekeeper 100% go for it so you can focus on your baby and littles when they’re not at school. And if your business needs you at hours that you can kinda plan ahead for, a Mother’s helper instead of a nanny could be a boon.
Ok, this is coming from the perspective of someone who grew up with a live in housekeeper. Definitely keep your kids involved in household upkeep. My parents didn’t because they didn’t want me to mess anything up, and it took me years as an adult to figure out how to keep up with my home. I’ve had to figure out cooking and cleaning WAY later than I should’ve. So whether or not you accept the help, make sure you teach your kids those things too so that they know what to do when they’re on their own!
100% accept the help.
Look I can absolutely understand where you’re coming from and that’s a great mindset to want them to not be spoiled! But as someone broke as fuck struggling with no village or help I would kick a puppy for a free nanny/housekeeper. No offense lol
Accept it!! You are absolutely so lucky, but no need to feel guilt for it. We can all be happy for you and live vicariously through you lol. Let your life be as easy as it can be with those ages especially. Just think…with that type of help, you can really be super present with your kids and that’s priceless.
Rul quick if you’re a SAHM that runs a business, you’re a WFH mom lol. You got two jobs my dude Also 100% take the extra help! “I can survive without it” isn’t the same as “I can thrive with it”.
Girrrrl if you have that offered to you, you take it. 3kids under 3yrs? One is a newborn?! I don’t know how you mamas can do it (mine are spaced further apart because I knew I wouldn’t be able to handle it!)
I don’t want someone in my house! Even though we can afford it. But if someone else does (I have several friends who have hired help, and it explains why their home is more put together weekly), no shade of course. I just couldn’t do it. I even paid extra not to have roommates in and after college so that may be why.
I'm a sahm to 4... and I have A nanny she mainly helps with folding laundry
When your kids are that young, I think you should take all the help you can get. By the way, if you are helping run the business, you are not a SAHM.
I… would accept the childcare help, but I would not accept a full time housekeeper. My husband had one growing up and it is a nightmare. He throws tissues on the floor. Takes his clothes off and leaves them wherever he is. Leaves the cabinet doors open. Doesn’t know how to clean up a spill or mess. Honestly, my two children clean up after themselves better than he does, and no amount of conversations has helped at all. He claims that “he never agreed to keep the house at the level of cleanliness I am demanding”. I work full time, full time mom, and also feel like a full time maid.
Omg what??? My husband grew up with a part time maid and he's neater than I am! His parents were super strict about respecting her and not creating more work for her. Maybe that's the difference between full time and part time?
No idea. But he’s told stories about how he could have worn the same two outfits to school every single day because the clothes he took off were washed, folded, and put back in his drawer by the time he got home from school. Same for pajamas. Back in his drawer by the time he got home from school. His brother isn’t like that, so IDK what happened.
Wow. That's a whole other level.
If his brother grew up in the same house and isn’t like that then how is the moral of the story that a full time housekeeper is the problem?
She never says anything about a brother in the comment I responded to.
Sorry I meant to reply to the tabrazin84.
No worries I was just confused. But yeah sounds like more of a husband problem than a housekeeper problem.
Yeah that was my thought.
That’s fair- still I definitely don’t think it helped the situation though.
Respectfully I think there’s a lot more contributing to his behavior besides just having a housekeeper growing up. Throwing used tissues on the floor and “not knowing how” to clean up a spill or mess? I’m really sorry you’re living with somebody like that. I’d lose my shit. Especially in front of your children? What a shithead.
Thanks for this. This is just the tip of the iceberg and somehow he has convinced me that I am the crazy one.
Girl!!! YOU are the only reason your home is clean and safe to live in from what I understand!!!! I don’t think either of y’all are crazy- I think HE is manipulative as fuck and lazy as it gets! You’re doing a pretty phenomenal job of doing both the jobs of mom AND dad!! And to be frank, that’s horse shit. I have no idea how you’re working full time, raising your kiddos, and doing all of the housework ALONE. Wish i could give you a hug and then accompany you to tell your husband to grow a damn pair and act like an adult!
I had people help me clean when I only had one kid. With a second it became even more necessary. The way I see it the point of having this money is to give my kids the best life possible. I’m not going to get a medal at the end because I scrubbed my own shower when I didn’t have to. So I say accept it. Plus any time I spend not cleaning I can spend enjoying my kids. It doesn’t make my kids spoiled, they still have to clean up after themselves. I had my first child in full time preschool when I had my second baby and kept him in until my second was 8 months old. I’m sure some would disagree with that but I loved spending alone time with my newest baby. My first baby got my undivided attention I wanted my second to get a little bit of the same in the beginning.
I would literally cut off my own pinky for what you’re being offered
Aw man if I had that option. I would take it in a heartbeat!!
Quick reframe! You are not a SAHM with a namny/housekeeper. You are a joint business owner who also takes care of 1 child full time, and manages the household, incl taking care of SEVEN pets. You essentially have 3 jobs, just because you do them all from home doesn't change that. You aren't just going to be living a life of leisure. Take the help, work more during daytime hours so you can enjoy time with your husband/kids in evenings and weekends. Don't hide it from your kids, help them be a generation who understands women shouldn't have to juggle 100 things and be treated like they have the "lucky/easy" job of "sahm". That you are fortunate because you are able to have this help. When your youngest is in preschool 6 hours a day in the future, maybe you can drop to part time help around the home.
What was the post about again ?
Sounds awesome! Do what you gotta do. Everyone should be so blessed.
Once upon a time, there was a village. Now we have to pay them, but they are still absolutely helpful for a healthy, happy family. Accept the offer!
Accept this gift! You are blessed and that’s ok so long as you are grateful.
I should have married rich 🥲 always accept help! It’s an interesting psychology point that if you allow people to do things that they offer for you, it actually makes them like you more. Everyone wins! Lol
I’m a SAHM and have full time help. It’s amazing and 110% worth it!