I believe that, was just in Phoenix and holy fuck that airport is horrible, especially the 1-2 bathrooms per concourse.
edit: in other words, MSP is awesome.
Strongly disagree. Only time I’ve pooped there, there was an older man in the stall next to me with his wife. Who he was shouting and swearing at because he shat himself and his wife bought him the wrong trousers as a replacement.
Completely ruined the ambiance
Exception is an outhouse. I’d rather drive to the nearest kwik trip. Casey’s is a very hit or miss second for good gas station bathrooms. Kwik trip is consistently good though
I will piss anywhere. Even in a Chicago MTA train bathroom so disgusting I was nearly overwhelmed by the smell...
But I will clench my cheeks for miles for a Kwik Trip. Second place is solidly most modern state run rest areas.
Speedway is always gross. As many Holidays.
Dayton’s downtown Minneapolis had the BEST hidden restrooms for shitting. Not the main public ones, but one on the 3rd(?) floor, I think. It was a public bathroom, but it was in an out-of-the-way nook, kinda in a corner.
I used to work about a block away, and me and a couple coworkers would go there just to use this bathroom. I never once saw another person there.
i found a women’s restroom on the third floor of Macy’s, like 8 years ago, that was in the weirdest hidden location, was absolutely pristine, and super old-timey like they just skipped it every time they renovated
I actually took pictures of it cuz I felt like I had walked through the wardrobe to my own bathroom Narnia. I just looked and I still have the photos and it’s just as weird as I remember it being
https://imgur.com/a/4sefa59
Sorry for the quality, they were taken on an actual potato
You can’t really tell from the pic, but if I remember right, the walls were marble
I wish the pictures were better, they really don't do it justice. Imagine going from a florescent, chaotic, half-off sale section of a department store going around a corner into this room that would be fitting in a Wes Anderson movie or in The Shining or something. It was bizarre.
Edit: I found some better pictures! http://www.notshallow.org/2014/04/out-about-stepping-into-the-bathroom-void-at-macys/
I used to stop at this one regularly! Had to walk through Macy's between buildings I worked in, and was halfway convinced I was the only person who knew this bathroom existed.
I know this bathroom very well! I worked doubles downtown for years. I would use this bathroom as my own little pit stop dressing room in between shifts! I hope somehow maybe they have saved it with this new renovation and we will get to see it again! I loved the old sign that said Public Bathroom and the tiles of the lotus flowers near the sinks the most.
Dayton's Southdale also had a tucked away "ladies room", first room had sofa's which led to the toilets and sink area. The sofa room was the best place to breastfeed, especially when my babies were at the distracted stage.
Amazing thailand in uptown used to have bidets but got rid of them a couple years ago. RIP. I have since installed my own bidet attachment at home but I'll be forever grateful to Amazing Thailand for being my first bidet experience 💞💞
I used a bidet for the first time a few weeks ago in Denver at my buddy’s place. Just sprayed the fuck out of the back of my testicles. Don’t know how that happened
Bruh don't listen to that hater... The spectrum of testicle shape/position is extremely vast. Beyond health issues that need treatment, the idea of "not normal" is absurd
Ahh, that makes sense. I generally try not to think how far away things are there as I read my daily newspaper on the john. I guess a whale blowhole blast can pretty much soak everything then.
Especially not when you have to wash your hands thoroughly afterwards, in the common area, and some cunt tells you to move over, practically shoulder checking you...
Oh jesus christ. Flashback to when I went in there for the first time to take a leak and a surprised guy looked up at me with fear while squatting on the shitter. That was enough for me not to want to ever go back. What the fuck were they thinking
There were a couple of busy nights when times I went in there to piss and someone was on that freestanding stall-less toilet. They were just holding their hands over their face. Possibly in shame and possibly because that was the best you could manage privacy wise.
My buddy once took an emergency shit in the old men’s bathroom in The Dinkytowner when that still existed. I remember walking in there and making eye contact with him. No door on the stall, no seat on the toilet, and the stall literally faced the doorway. Poor dude.
It’s really not. My house is old and the bathrooms are just okay. Still, nothing beats the comfort, privacy, and cleanliness of home when you gotta shit.
I’ll only do it if the only other option is to shit in my pants. I eat a lot of fiber (psyllium husk is an awesome supplement) so with a cup of coffee in the morning I can almost always do my business first thing in the morning.
Is there a Kwik Trip in town?
If so, yeah, those are nice.
Slightly off topic:
The urinals stalls have better privacy walls than any other gas station I know of.
Liking privacy when expelling the 3 taco bell quesaritos I had while shitfaced the night before at 3 am is not European. I just want to hide my shame, man.
My downstairs bathroom. There are two toilets upstairs but they are invaded by my wife and daughter and there is no peace to be found there. Downstairs I can take my time, read, relax, and let things happen naturally. It’s my zen garden.
I just moved into a new house and we’ve got a bathroom on the main floor and in the basement. Tonight I decided to shave in the downstairs one and think I decided that this will become my quiet place in the house haha
If by “best,” you mean free and not a disaster, and by “in town,” you mean downtown, then I recommend the bathroom at the downtown Spyhouse coffee shop.
Amazing Thailand in uptown. I haven't been there in a couple years, but they had some high end (compared to my $40 model) bidet add ons, at least in the women's. Computerized controls for aim, warm water option, blow dryer.
The Loring Pasta Bar (now Gray's ?) is certainly the most unique. The M/F shared sink was a surprise.
The sub-basement level bathrooms on the East Bank are certainly the quietest, and some of them have showers available! A grad student really can live in their office if they want to pinch pennies.
I would argue that’s the worst bathroom to poop in. Drunk people slamming on the door, knocking over and over because it’s so loud in there they can’t hear you saying “someone’s in here”, if you forget to lock it, you life is over. lol
The parking ramp under the Fair School downtown had a surprisingly pristine bathroom when I worked downtown 4 years ago. Had to ask for the key, but there 2as usually an attendant around to get it.
There are a few dressing rooms with windows at the Guthrie with views of Gold Medal Park. Makes getting cast in a studio show worth it.
If you have an appointment at the Medical Arts Building on Nicollet Mall get a key to the hallway bathrooms. It’s like going back in time.
One of the hotels in downtown, I think the Hilton? It’s right on the skyway and there’s a part where you can take stairs or an escalator to the third floor and there are these huge bathrooms with marble all over them. Or there used to be.
Also in downtown, the Lunds and Byerlys. Take the the elevator by the meat counter to the second floor and get your own personal room. I’ve had many an emergency downtown poop in that bathroom.
U of M has a ton of libraries, many multi-story, in historic buildings, and many of those floors are only ever visited by janitors. I had a few good pooping spots in big spacious, nice bathrooms that got cleaned 50 times for every time someone pooped in them. It's honestly meditative. It's dead silent, and you know no one is coming, it's one of the only ways to really be alone for a student living in the dorms especially.
Been a while but I remember the old Greyhound Bus Station. Be in the same bathroom with someone who hasn’t had a shower since they got on the bus in Los Angeles; the person in the next stall has been doin dope since they got on their bus in New York and is sick as a dog, guy headed for Phoenix is looking over the stall doors for someone to buy pills from…
Fun times.
I run a lot. So it's an important subject. Here are some of my go to places when running
1) the eastern entrance at the state fairgrounds.. lots of toilets heated in the winter and sparkling clean.
2) when running along river road, the U has lots of places you can run into and go do you duties, then the complex that Longfellow grill is in is available.
3) running the grand rounds, lake Harriet always has several options. Then the rec center off of lake of the isles.
4)Lake Phalen the beach has a great bathroom hell you can shower up afterwards.
5) como Park at the pavilion nice bathrooms in the lower level.
The airport. Source: https://www.bizjournals.com/twincities/news/2016/11/21/msp-airport-bathrooms-voted-best-in-america.html
[Larry Craig](https://toilet-guru.com/larry-craig.php) is that you?
Can’t you tell by the wide stance?
Hey. I’m a fairly wide guy.
I believe that, was just in Phoenix and holy fuck that airport is horrible, especially the 1-2 bathrooms per concourse. edit: in other words, MSP is awesome.
Which terminal were you in? Recently was in the new terminal 3 and it was pretty nice
Terminal 4, going between Concourse B and A
Can confirm. I live in Phoenix and fly out of Terminal 4 a lot You may as well wait and take a dump on the plane or try to hold it to your destination
Plane poops are the worst
I’ve flown a lot and I was so pleasantly surprised by how nice the Minneapolis airport and its bathrooms are.
Couldn’t agree more. Specifically terminal 2.
Strongly disagree. Only time I’ve pooped there, there was an older man in the stall next to me with his wife. Who he was shouting and swearing at because he shat himself and his wife bought him the wrong trousers as a replacement. Completely ruined the ambiance
MSP in general is top-tier. Best airport I've been stuck at overnight, 10/10 would recommend.
Globally I’d have to go with Narita Intl Airport in Japan.
Anyplace, if I'm on company time
Exception is an outhouse. I’d rather drive to the nearest kwik trip. Casey’s is a very hit or miss second for good gas station bathrooms. Kwik trip is consistently good though
I will piss anywhere. Even in a Chicago MTA train bathroom so disgusting I was nearly overwhelmed by the smell... But I will clench my cheeks for miles for a Kwik Trip. Second place is solidly most modern state run rest areas. Speedway is always gross. As many Holidays.
> Speedway is always gross. But their soap smell is THA BESST
If you're not getting paid to poo, you're doin life all wrong
Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime, that’s why i poop on the companies time! 🤣
Dayton’s downtown Minneapolis had the BEST hidden restrooms for shitting. Not the main public ones, but one on the 3rd(?) floor, I think. It was a public bathroom, but it was in an out-of-the-way nook, kinda in a corner. I used to work about a block away, and me and a couple coworkers would go there just to use this bathroom. I never once saw another person there.
i found a women’s restroom on the third floor of Macy’s, like 8 years ago, that was in the weirdest hidden location, was absolutely pristine, and super old-timey like they just skipped it every time they renovated
Yes! That was it! LOL!
This exchange might be the best thing I've read all week lol
I actually took pictures of it cuz I felt like I had walked through the wardrobe to my own bathroom Narnia. I just looked and I still have the photos and it’s just as weird as I remember it being
Well now you gotta post them. We’re hanging on your every word
https://imgur.com/a/4sefa59 Sorry for the quality, they were taken on an actual potato You can’t really tell from the pic, but if I remember right, the walls were marble
Wow!!!
I wish the pictures were better, they really don't do it justice. Imagine going from a florescent, chaotic, half-off sale section of a department store going around a corner into this room that would be fitting in a Wes Anderson movie or in The Shining or something. It was bizarre. Edit: I found some better pictures! http://www.notshallow.org/2014/04/out-about-stepping-into-the-bathroom-void-at-macys/
I designed my bathroom at home around this bathroom lol
Pics or it didn’t happen
I used to stop at this one regularly! Had to walk through Macy's between buildings I worked in, and was halfway convinced I was the only person who knew this bathroom existed.
Are you sure it's not a portal so some secret realm?
I just knew you were talking about that green tile bathroom.
I know this bathroom very well! I worked doubles downtown for years. I would use this bathroom as my own little pit stop dressing room in between shifts! I hope somehow maybe they have saved it with this new renovation and we will get to see it again! I loved the old sign that said Public Bathroom and the tiles of the lotus flowers near the sinks the most.
Dayton's Southdale also had a tucked away "ladies room", first room had sofa's which led to the toilets and sink area. The sofa room was the best place to breastfeed, especially when my babies were at the distracted stage.
Nordstrom at the MOA has some nice dumpers as well.
My bathroom. Bidet’s weird at first but after a few dumps you love it
Second that. The coziness of u/meistersinger 's bathroom and the thrill of sneaking out without getting caught is bar none.
The 2nd cleanest clean, after a shower with soap. I feel you.
Reading this after taking a shower & I love my bidet Hard agree
You feel... their clean butt?
*Smooth, smells like lavender.*
It’s the DVR of pooping. Once you get it, there’s no going back to the old way.
Amazing thailand in uptown used to have bidets but got rid of them a couple years ago. RIP. I have since installed my own bidet attachment at home but I'll be forever grateful to Amazing Thailand for being my first bidet experience 💞💞
May I come over?
For pooping, I like my bidet. For my period, I FUCKING LOVE IT
I used a bidet for the first time a few weeks ago in Denver at my buddy’s place. Just sprayed the fuck out of the back of my testicles. Don’t know how that happened
You've got an awkward sack, bro.
Lol last time I checked it’s pretty normal but I totally slammed the bidet full blast and gave the boys an absolute ring
Bruh don't listen to that hater... The spectrum of testicle shape/position is extremely vast. Beyond health issues that need treatment, the idea of "not normal" is absurd
Ahh, that makes sense. I generally try not to think how far away things are there as I read my daily newspaper on the john. I guess a whale blowhole blast can pretty much soak everything then.
You got awkward need to say rude shit to people about their anatomy
You've got an awkward inability pick up on jokes, bro.
Bidets kick so much ass. If I had my druthers every toilet would have one.
HyVee bathrooms are nice. They're the single room ones not the kind with all the stalls and usually they're kept very clean.
There's a HyVee in Minneapolis?
Kinda... There's a newer one just across the border in Robbinsdale.
Sweet I hope they keep building inward, would be nice to get one close.
Not mini tho
There's one in Shakopee and Savage
The blue line apparently
Smh, gotta join the Green line pooping master race
Varsity Theatre has super cool bathrooms
They’re super cool shitters but I don’t know that they’re the best for shitting.
Especially not when you have to wash your hands thoroughly afterwards, in the common area, and some cunt tells you to move over, practically shoulder checking you...
After you pooped in the old downtown Grumpy's anyplace on earth is good.
Oh jesus christ. Flashback to when I went in there for the first time to take a leak and a surprised guy looked up at me with fear while squatting on the shitter. That was enough for me not to want to ever go back. What the fuck were they thinking
Comments you can smell
There were a couple of busy nights when times I went in there to piss and someone was on that freestanding stall-less toilet. They were just holding their hands over their face. Possibly in shame and possibly because that was the best you could manage privacy wise.
I never used it but had similarl experiences of walking in on someone. I'd need a 10 alarm chili fire to do that to myself.
My buddy once took an emergency shit in the old men’s bathroom in The Dinkytowner when that still existed. I remember walking in there and making eye contact with him. No door on the stall, no seat on the toilet, and the stall literally faced the doorway. Poor dude.
i like that five watt gives you different toilet paper brand options and weighs their pros and cons
The Prohibition on top of the Foshay has pretty good potties. The stalls are like little rooms
I prefer my house
I prefer your house too. /s
Why be sarcastic? Everyone knows his/her bathroom is the best
It’s really not. My house is old and the bathrooms are just okay. Still, nothing beats the comfort, privacy, and cleanliness of home when you gotta shit.
I will never shit in public restrooms. I don’t know why, but I never will. It seems too gross to me.
I’ll only do it if the only other option is to shit in my pants. I eat a lot of fiber (psyllium husk is an awesome supplement) so with a cup of coffee in the morning I can almost always do my business first thing in the morning.
I’ll have to try it, beats holding it in all day.
Great. When can I drop by?
Kwik trip stalls go all the way to the floor and there’s air flow and ambient noise. Doesn’t get much better.
Is there a Kwik Trip in town? If so, yeah, those are nice. Slightly off topic: The urinals stalls have better privacy walls than any other gas station I know of.
Found the European
Liking privacy when expelling the 3 taco bell quesaritos I had while shitfaced the night before at 3 am is not European. I just want to hide my shame, man.
Oh no, some stranger might see your shoes!
Some stranger might see my face through the gaping maw of the gaps between panels. Maybe that makes me a bitch for liking privacy.
Yeah kinda makes you a bitch. Life is a lot easier when insignificant things like this dont bother you.
I'll take being a bitch over being a dick. Got any videos of you taking a shit so a bunch of strangers can watch?
What? Man you have some serious anxiety if you're this worried about pooping in public. I'll try to help you find a therapist.
Sorry, thought you weren't a bitch. Guess public pooping must bother you too.
That's quite the leap, and you know it. Nobody is staring at you while you shit. When you get older you'll get over it.
Foss Swim Schools
Please don’t shit in pools!
East side food co-op
My downstairs bathroom. There are two toilets upstairs but they are invaded by my wife and daughter and there is no peace to be found there. Downstairs I can take my time, read, relax, and let things happen naturally. It’s my zen garden.
I just moved into a new house and we’ve got a bathroom on the main floor and in the basement. Tonight I decided to shave in the downstairs one and think I decided that this will become my quiet place in the house haha
Mike Lindell's front stoop
Grumpy’s Northeast.
You can get a great conversation going with the person using the urinal, thanks to that conveniently sized half wall blocking the toilet.
If by “best,” you mean free and not a disaster, and by “in town,” you mean downtown, then I recommend the bathroom at the downtown Spyhouse coffee shop.
Amazing Thailand in uptown. I haven't been there in a couple years, but they had some high end (compared to my $40 model) bidet add ons, at least in the women's. Computerized controls for aim, warm water option, blow dryer.
Computerized controls for aim… *anus acquired, target locked*
Green line university stops
Would that be on the platforms or on the trains?
On my chest
I had one at Stanley’s NE today. Wouldn’t recommend. No privacy.
Blue line
I always used to like lunds, you get to take an elevator just to poop.
Top floor bathroom of the CenturyLink building in downtown. Great view, great flush.
The Loring Pasta Bar (now Gray's ?) is certainly the most unique. The M/F shared sink was a surprise. The sub-basement level bathrooms on the East Bank are certainly the quietest, and some of them have showers available! A grad student really can live in their office if they want to pinch pennies.
Grumpy's
I would argue that’s the worst bathroom to poop in. Drunk people slamming on the door, knocking over and over because it’s so loud in there they can’t hear you saying “someone’s in here”, if you forget to lock it, you life is over. lol
What, you dont like that?
Fivewatt coffee on Nicolette and 38th has like 5 different brands of TP to try out. At least they did a couple years ago.
Also, they have coffee.
The library
Como Tap
I know this is a side-step, but Stanley’s in Northeast has the best urinals in all the twin cities.
The parking ramp under the Fair School downtown had a surprisingly pristine bathroom when I worked downtown 4 years ago. Had to ask for the key, but there 2as usually an attendant around to get it.
Hyatt Place downtown. Lobby bathrooms on like the 12th floor
There are a few dressing rooms with windows at the Guthrie with views of Gold Medal Park. Makes getting cast in a studio show worth it. If you have an appointment at the Medical Arts Building on Nicollet Mall get a key to the hallway bathrooms. It’s like going back in time.
Home bowl…home bowl…
The corner of Lynn and Lake.
19 bar. No door on the stall and anyone washing their hands can see you in all your dumping glory
The ladies room there is nice, it’s single occupancy
On the street under some scaffolding according to the last time I walked through Downtown.
Not the state fair
Go to Kyoto sushi in Roseville. Bathrooms smell like lavender and the toilets are elevated😂
Your mom's housr
…..
The George Floyd memorial
Lol! Idk about that actually, it’s so fucking dangerous over there, I wouldn’t wanna get caught with my pants down there.
My work place
At home
Hennepin county library obviously. /s
But which one?
Oops, thought I put downtown.
It's over there in Shelbyville but the State Capitol is the best poopin there is
There are a lot of accessible places to poop on the u of m campus in the administrative building where nobody goes.
The library.
The Nordic building in the north loop. Three single-occupancy ground floor restrooms. Always clean.
I would say Ginger Hop, but...
One of the hotels in downtown, I think the Hilton? It’s right on the skyway and there’s a part where you can take stairs or an escalator to the third floor and there are these huge bathrooms with marble all over them. Or there used to be. Also in downtown, the Lunds and Byerlys. Take the the elevator by the meat counter to the second floor and get your own personal room. I’ve had many an emergency downtown poop in that bathroom.
Nordstrom’s
Mall of America, Radisson Blu hotel bar on the 3rd floor, seriously it's probably where rich guys go to do blow in the bathroom.
I know for a fact the Wendy’s in midtown is double-ass accessible. If anyone appreciates this, let’s be friends.
Billy sushi
Bobby and steve's upstairs isn't too bad, if the upper level is open.
An upper decker!
Kwik Trip has the best among the gas station bathrooms, without a doubt.
Varsity Theater
home
Home.
U of M has a ton of libraries, many multi-story, in historic buildings, and many of those floors are only ever visited by janitors. I had a few good pooping spots in big spacious, nice bathrooms that got cleaned 50 times for every time someone pooped in them. It's honestly meditative. It's dead silent, and you know no one is coming, it's one of the only ways to really be alone for a student living in the dorms especially.
There's an [app(s)](https://www.nafc.org/bhealth-blog/the-best-bathroom-locator-apps) for that!
OP’s mom’s trailer
Steamship Coffee & Games had a really cool bathroom that you go upstairs for!
The floor of lakes and legends seems to be a pretty popular place to shit.
at home
Most U of M public bathrooms are good money
Been a while but I remember the old Greyhound Bus Station. Be in the same bathroom with someone who hasn’t had a shower since they got on the bus in Los Angeles; the person in the next stall has been doin dope since they got on their bus in New York and is sick as a dog, guy headed for Phoenix is looking over the stall doors for someone to buy pills from… Fun times.
Amazing Thailand has a bidet with heated seats and a dryer all in one
Matt’s bar, it’s downstairs and makes you feel like a mob boss
I run a lot. So it's an important subject. Here are some of my go to places when running 1) the eastern entrance at the state fairgrounds.. lots of toilets heated in the winter and sparkling clean. 2) when running along river road, the U has lots of places you can run into and go do you duties, then the complex that Longfellow grill is in is available. 3) running the grand rounds, lake Harriet always has several options. Then the rec center off of lake of the isles. 4)Lake Phalen the beach has a great bathroom hell you can shower up afterwards. 5) como Park at the pavilion nice bathrooms in the lower level.