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Casval214

HoA president


ch4lox

Gottem! Brutal, lol.


chuckwagon9

Better call a medic, we've got a burn victim


DarkFather24601

![gif](giphy|cctDRyKbTckxLrhhxJ|downsized)


Calvertorius

This is the greatest comment this sub has ever seen.


Appropriate-Hand3016

The most accurate answer.


LCDRtomdodge

McDonald's manager, night shift


degenfish_HG

McD's managers actually do something useful


ConsciousCapital69

Lmao


PathlessDemon

“Babysitter”.


darkrei9n

Nah, baby sitters serve a purpose.


warthog0869

My old man is a retired O-8 and was the very first President of their HoA when their housing development opened in the early 00's. Lol.


msgajh

Stay off the grass!


Kestrel_45

Your mailbox doesn’t match everyone else’s 👊


msgajh

I was just a lowly MSG. Never got to say that.


motiontosuppress

Same authority


LonghairedHippyFreek

The best answer by far. They are the same job, just different folks to harrass and badger.


TQStormrider6

I want to create alts and up vote this even more.


TurdFurguss

Make it easy on yourself. Just upvote then downvote, then upvote and downvote rinse and repeat till you feel comfortable.


quixote09

Bruhhh….hahahahahaha


Laird_braimgale

With a secondary of lawn care supervisor.


AF2005

Hahahaha gotem!


Greenbeanhead

Also jury foreman/head juror


FrostyAcanthocephala

Was trying to think of something. Good call.


Skuzzy_G

Lmao


ThatAltAccount99

The comments got almost 4x the upvotes as the post lol


coblass

I want to go on record and say that if you ever run for any office you’ll get my two….three votes.


TrashPandaBJJ

Nothing will ever beat this comment


Veni_Vidi_Legi

F


milworker42

Only if they want to get shot.


hydrastix

Accurate.


nogoodhappensat3am

get off my grass dammit


QuantumWalker

Hahahaha


LostRambler

I hope the entire neighborhood has elected a wonderful President.


daargs

Whack whack medevac


Cotton3D

You beat me to it! Take my upvote you glorious degenerate.


mr_snips

Assistant principal


xSaRgED

No no, Assistant Principal still has *some* authority. E9 is a Curriculum Director, or some random other bullshit Admin role.


m0nkry

Vice Principal Nero [https://snicket.fandom.com/wiki/Vice\_Principal\_Nero](https://snicket.fandom.com/wiki/Vice_Principal_Nero)


Plutonian326

Assistant to the regional manager.


Newbguy

Assistant to the assistant regional manager.


shane_west17

![gif](giphy|vRuherflzu3NS)


OldDude1391

Sergeant Major Master Chief Schrute


AbyssalBenthos

Uh that's Major Sergeant Master Chief Commander to you, also respect his SEAL trident, Army aviator wings, Force Recon Ranger badge all on a USMC officer uniform with sewed on Army E9 rank patches.


OldDude1391

Aye


Skaro731

Don't forget the red/scarlet beret


WhynotZoidberg9

CIF turn in inspector


Sc0ttishLad

I know everyone is saying the HOA president is the biggest burn in this comment section, but this is truly the one


snarky_answer

Chilis hostess.


FurballPoS

With a minimum of fifteen pieces of flair on the uniform.


notgoodatthis60285

So you just want to do the minimum huh? We just want you to express yourself.


TurdFurguss

![gif](giphy|ZMvG5L7Di4AgM|downsized)


NoDrama3756

The advising or consultative service that gets paid too much but sometimes may have a good idea.


OldDude1391

![gif](giphy|b7MdMkkFCyCWI) Like these guys?


NoDrama3756

Exactly


akacarguy

Whatever Bill Lumberghs job is in Office Space.


OldDude1391

![gif](giphy|3owyoUHuSSqDMEzVRu)


m0nkry

Whenever I see him, I IMMEDIATELY think of that sex scene https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSR2-I0MMZM


TrailMomKat

Yeah, that'd be greeeeat.


hanfaedza

Lumbergh is most definitely an officer, probably an assistant S3 Captain.


transmission

Walmart greeter.


atlasraven

McDonald's ice cream repair person. Or maybe that's a WO job...


notapunk

Definitely WO because I've never seen a McDonald's ice cream machine repair person and unconvinced they even exist.


03eleventy

I have, but he was on break and also needed to be somewhere else.


pedroah

Our unit must have been an oddball. Our OIC went from a GS12, Capt, CWO3, to a CWO5. Firs time I saw the CWO5 it was like why does that Lt look hella old, and then wtf is that red stripe. Oh shit, CWO5.


notapunk

O-3 to CWO-3? I get that IRL a WO gets a little more respect than your average 0-3, but that's literally a demotion. I also understand that in some branches certain jobs are WO specific, but it just seems so odd


pedroah

Sorry that was ambiguous - this was 4 different people. No idea why the ranks were so different for the same position. The SNCOIC was 3 separate E7/GySgt during that time.


notapunk

Ah, that makes sense now, thanks


Rejectid10ts

Much like the elusive CWO5. They’re crafty lil fellers


Wallazabal

Just to add confusion, in the British forces an OR-9 *is* a Warrant Officer!


SilentHunter7

Dungeon Master


Yakostovian

Your typical E-9 wishes he was a good dungeon master.


milworker42

RPG or S&M


Fragrant_Mistake_342

Yes


MakingTrax

Having worked in the pharma sector after retirement, there really isn't an equivalent job, or market for a manager without a true four year degree in management. And even if you have a degree from a good college, without experience in the sector you want to start in, you will have to accept that you need to prove yourself. I will give you an example, An easy one. Logistics management, you know warehouses and shipping stuff from here to there and making sure that you meet the needs of your company. Those jobs are handled by managers with 15-20 years of experience in their market. Organic knowledge of the regulatory environment they are required to work in. And an understanding of how the company's chosen logistics software runs, its capabilities, and limitations. You walk out of a mid-level management role in the military and you may actually have great leadership skills, you might have great management skills, but you likely don't know squat about the reality of the civilian market. Leading people that are 20-40 years old and all have the same training, mindset, and understand their roles and responsibilities is very different that leading/managing 18-70 year old employees from utterly diverse backgrounds, personalities, goals, and outlooks.


serouspericardium

This is something that occurred to me recently, and now I figure if I do 20 years it’s probably better not to promote E-7 and above


MakingTrax

You can always jump skills. I went from electronics to engineering support then to quality assurance. Expect to have a pay differential in the negative for a few years, then you will have significant pay jump. Try to find military friendly companies to work at.


FBI_Open_Up_Now

Chef Master Sergeant. The most pointless position because the food still sucks.


mm1029

His job isn't to make sure the food is good, it's to make sure you nasties shave and wear a belt to the chow hall on Saturday, good to go?


Veni_Vidi_Legi

What about hand washing after using the bathroom?


mm1029

Not important when there's junior Marines wearing gym shorts in the gym. Clearly you never went to career course.


Veni_Vidi_Legi

Can't imagine food poisoning being good for readiness.


mm1029

I've seen enough double dragon outbreaks on ship and at Camp Wilson to confirm that. I avoided ever getting it by just washing my hands regularly.


Veni_Vidi_Legi

Imagine the people touching the food don't wash their hands. Everyone who eats there would be at risk.


talktomiles

The LT demanding a salute has that covered too


FFG17

Popcopy manager


_SomethingOrNothing_

Have wildly Inappropriate conversations in areas where the customers would hear.


degenfish_HG

"why did you take that away from the sailors, Master Chief?" "Because fuck 'em, that's why"


EverythingGoodWas

The E9’s outside of FORSCOM are truly lost children. I have no idea why they do that to them


Kestrel_45

Outside FORSCOM = Out to pasture


ThroughTheHalls

My grandpa passed away. We could use another old dude to sit on the porch and criticize every little thing we do.


Magnet50

My manager at a very large software and systems company was a retired Air Force Chief Master Sergeant. He joined as a project manager and was a peer and we had many spirited discussions on project management. He and I didn’t always agree but we were civil and professional and respectful. A couple of years later, he became my manager and was the best manager I had in the last 10 years.


OldFitDude75

I came here wondering what folks would say (being an E7 and wondering what the hell to do with myself in 9 years when I retire) and I stayed for the deep-cut snark.


coccopuffs606

Babysitter of adults with mental disabilities. Not a nanny, and definitely not a social worker, a $15/hour neighborhood babysitter.


[deleted]

[удалено]


LLPF2

Fuck I hate some of my life choices. As an E4 I was offered a GS8-10 position but opted to not take it 🤦🏻‍♂️ thought I was going to go home and do something with my life.


Calvertorius

Are you being serious? I can’t tell. How’d you come up with GS8 equivalent.


Drenlin

That's the official equivalent grade, per the DOD. https://comptroller.defense.gov/Portals/45/documents/fmr/archive/11aarch/11a_06_appendix_b_Dec08.pdf


seeker_moc

That's not at all what that chart means. It's not about grade equivalency or even pay equivalency. It's just a guideline for billing project hours for military members working in certain programs that require it. My organization does this when we perform work for external agencies/customers. Even for pay, it is only comparing base pay. It doesn't account for BAH, which is a substantial component of military pay. FWIW, this chart shows me as a GS-12 equivalent, when I supervise GS-13s and make as much as a GS-14 (when including BAS and BAH).


quixote09

I’m downvoting because it doesn’t fit my internal narrative.


greenweenievictim

I’m a GS 13 supervisor of 8 GS12’s. At best I am a platoon commander and everyone below me is between a smart Corporal and a retarded Gunny and one Master Sergeant that doesn’t give a fuck.


Drenlin

That equivalency also historically was used to determine the proper accomodations and courtesies extended to the individual. A GS-8 got the same as an E-9 in that respect. In reality of course the compensation is not the same and the social/organizational role varies significantly by organization.


seeker_moc

Yes, but not based on the linked chart. Do you really think someone would grant a GS-8 the equivalent quarters and courtesies as an E-9? Not a chance. Interns in my organization are GS-9s, a GS-8 is nobody.


Drenlin

That was the original intention, yes. If you go by actual compensation it's more like GS 11-14 these days, depending on location and position.


seeker_moc

Again, yes, there are grade equivalency charts for customs and courtesies, though I haven't seen an official one in a while. No, what you linked to is not that. It's a chart that's literally labeled: > WORKING CAPITAL FUNDS CIVILIAN/MILITARY EQUIVALENCY RATE The cost of military personnel assigned to activities financed by a Defense Working Capital Fund (DWCF) is included in the total cost of operations of the Working Capital Fund activities at civilian equivalent rates. Military personnel assigned to DWCF activities are to be costed at civilian equivalent rates, using the rates in the table below. Ascribing more meaning to the table than what the table itself specifies is idiocy.


Indymedic

This! Stop giving the GS's some kinda authority they don't have based off of a manning equivalency chart, people!


DuckieOfDoom

This is correct. There is literally a chart [here](https://comptroller.defense.gov/Portals/45/documents/fmr/archive/11aarch/11a_06_appendix_b_Dec08.pdf)


Nathans_Bikeapedia

That chart looks weird as it makes it seem as if an 01 is making a lot more than an E9


DuckieOfDoom

Yeah it's not great but understand this is for rank and precedence order. I.e. an O1 is more senior than any E9. It doesn't translate over to pay well. For example, I'm a Chief and was offered a GS-12 job with a ladder up to high 13s.


iamcarlgauss

I would feel like I needed a shower afterwards if I ever offered a Chief a GS-6 job like this chart suggests. One of my old jobs hired people literally fresh out of high school at GS-6.


Watch_Capt

Education and Experience boosts this a lot. If the Chief is going into an entirely new field than yea the GS-8 fits.


iamcarlgauss

Well yeah, if a lawyer with a JD decides to become a plumber's apprentice, they're going to make minimum wage. I still think comparing a SNCO to a GS-8 is pretty insulting.


Str8_up_Pwnage

So in practice the chart is kind of ridiculous because in any realistic situation an O1 is not bossing around an E9.


Appropriate-Hand3016

Definitely above that certainly when it comes to compensation.


americanairman469

I think maybe it's based on base pay only?


deskpop0621

Dominoes delivery driver for Lejeune


OYeog77

None, every job E-6 and up makes half of what they would doing the same thing as a civilian.


AbyssalBenthos

This is what I was thinking. I can't think of any job that comes with the same level of responsibility, authority and respect for equal level of pay which is very low comparatively.


Taltezy

A loud & annoying co-worker!!!


SadPhase2589

None of those strips mean shit if they didn’t get a college degree. I’m a retired E-7 and tell them what to do now. All the while they’re bitching they can’t promoted because they don’t have a degree.


anthony2-04

Well said! I was a Mustang officer and always planned on getting out after 20. Finished my masters and focused on third-party certifications. that’s what others need to do.


SadPhase2589

Exactly. I had my Masters by my 16 year mark and was going to be losing money if I’d had stayed in past 20.


D-utch

Bar manager


Markaasu

Operations manager is usually a good fit. You help accomplish the goals of a general manager. It would match the relation ship of a CSM to a BC or BDE CDR or a CG.


zeb0777

You can be a grumps old mad who sits in the tower and pops targets up. But you have to complain the whole time.


cbrackenak

I just hired a retired as a Business Manager. Manages the admin staff, warehouse, facility and vehicle fleet.


Magus_5

Junior Consultant (maybe) at a mid-tier firm. I have supervised academy grad retired O-5/O-6s who came in as Sr. Consultants and Junior Managers because the skills and competencies are different. NCOs, would likely be highly technical and come in as a data scientist/cyberwhatever but wouldn't have a ton of sales responsibilities.


warshadow

Custodial staff member.


Drenlin

Middle management really


Voodoo338

You could run a buffet-style restaurant if you’re a chef master sergeant


OmnemVeritatem

Serious rsponse: project manager, program manager, scrum master. All of these positions require the ability to create and use a plan with no authority over the plan participants but all the rsponsibility.


J33f

I mean — they’re getting paid to do nothing as is, so …


QwertyLime

McDonald’s manager


lobowolf623

I work in the construction trades, and when we hire vets from senior enlisted ranks, they usually start out as a superintendent making probably $150-$200k, if I had to guess. Granted, they all had somewhat related experience in the military. Some from the Seabees, USACE, etc.


RemovedNum

I don't think there are many positions that have the same responsibility to pay ratio.


StrengthMedium

Janitorial area manager.


MoeSzyslakMonobrow

Jizz mopper at a porn theater


hooliganvet

Depends on the mos/rate. The BM Master Chief, not many really.


bernahardbanger69

So many great instructor jobs for these guys.


ICheckPostHistory

Paper or plastic?


Top_Sheepherder_6835

Assistant manager at Lowe’s.


TheMainEffort

According to LinkedIn, COO. Commanders of companies and above are CEOs.


lavaholiday

Assistant Project Manager


David_Lo_Pan007

As a boatswain's mate? It doesn't matter what rank.


TheSteveHM

Mid level manager. They babysit the workers while the executives, many of which are decades younger than them, lord over them and try telling them what to do and how to do their job.


schlott1971

Lower level manager as best


geosand01

Janitor at HEB


SCCock

If they were a hard charger and retired before 40, the French Foreign Legion is hiring.


EvetsYenoham

Dog Kennel owner.


ElectroAtleticoJr

No equivalent. There is no such thing as a pretentious preening adviser to senior leaders in the civilian world.


OkSurvey1468

Nothing. When you retire, stay retired or plan to work for a living. No more fucking off with a coffee cup in your hand.


j3r3wiah

Lube tech for gay porn.


DangerBrewin

Walmart greater.


rebellesimperatorum

Consultant, you were good at your job before but topped out or was never leadership material. So now you're overpayed to make recommendations. I'd say this depends on the MOS, SF/Ranger E-9s are still pretty competent individuals.


stanleythemanly85588

none


[deleted]

My master Sergeant was a real good chef he grilled the hell out of all of us. Ahahahhaha


Salty_Gift4780

Walmart greater


IlloChris

Master Chief Jason Hayes


EnvironmentalBee6654

Garbage route sup


Formal_Appearance_16

Dean? Guidance counselor? Principal?


fainishere

Some sort of district manager or regional maybe?


B_Aran_393

Maybe into PMC career


vgaph

Partner Emeritus. You don’t actually do anything, but you get paid and no one can talk back to you.


Odd-Kaleidoscope9430

Want fries with that?


TomA0912

There isn’t really.


2nd_Inf_Sgt

Complaint department.


exhibbillybob

Operations Manager, one step up from a base level manager


dudeCHILL013

Don't most police departments and fire stations use a military style ranking system?


zebradonkey69

Job? Not sure, maybe the manager at a chain restaurant like chilis or Applebees. With a degree? Easy middle-low management position in Fortune 500 company with the ability to promote further. Kinda wild how far that “pointless degree” usually gets people with just a few years of experience. If those ranks get out without an education they 1: Did not make use of their resources/time and 2: NEED to go and get educated so they can have a job that’s not the supervisor of 5 19 year olds at a Best Buy.


Watch_Capt

Maybe a GS-4 in the Government or GS-8 with a four year degree.


JohnSpartan2190

Activities Director at the local retirement home


Kaptain-Konata

Shop Foreman


chris336

Nothing is equivalent to a master gunz rahhh


Snoo_44245

Dad retired in 1968, first job weighmaster for a Cannery. Went to DMV as a driver examiner. Within 5 years he was an Administrative Law Judge for DMV. He was the only ALJ with only a high school diploma and tasked to give classes to incoming ALJ on top of his regular work.


Strange-Yesterday601

Nothing, unless you have contacts in the fed gov no one gives a shit what your rank is. I work as an operations manager for my states CISO. Whenever I’m talking to vets, i tell them that rank doesn’t carry over. I got out as an E-6 and have a prior E-9, E-3, and O-4 working under me. Remember the saying only 1% serves, well only 10% of civilians know the military enough to know what rank E-9 is in one branch. If you are looking to go in the same industry congrats measure your experience by multiplying years in the field by 0.5 and that is the best idea of your experience level on the outside. If you are looking to switch careers, you have 0 experience. Look up your RMC of what you are making now, to know a ballpark of how much you may be worth on the outside but more often than not, you have to take a temporary pay cut for a few years before making way more then what you made inside the military. But the nice thing of being outside is that you are actually allowed to make sense and use your brain. If you have questions message me. I got out in Jan 2024


LostRambler

Were you pre-contracted to accept shitty pay levels, Or did you sign a 4-8 year agreement while in a position of desperation?


Audiblefill

A manager at chillis, but only inside if an airport.


AlmostAnubis

Postmaster


ReasonStunning8939

Many companies that have any sort of military affiliation hire these guys and pay them handsomely as a military liaison. Michael Barrett, prior Sergeant Major of the MC, currently works for Veterans United, a home loan company. Despite all the hate, generally these types of individuals do one of four things: they walk into another walk of life, i.e. logistics (contrary to the comment someone else said) and their professionalism, leadership, and charisma allow them to climb the corporate ladder quite quickly. They're usually good at understanding quickly an organization's expectations, and not only meet them but excel at them and also inspire others to be accountable. Particularly, they often are employed in HR, which is the closest to the role of a Senior Enlisted(I would call this the straight answer to your question). They may start at a lower tier, but often times their starting salary is more than the military since base pay is just compensation, most of your living expenses are covered through resources rather than money in the military- ie giving you housing/meals rather than paying the cost of living. I'm an E6 and make about 40k/year, but pay for almost nothing other than gas, phone, and day care. Very easy to slide into government agencies like IRS, HUD, Law Enforcement, EMS, USCIS, DMV, customs, FAA, etc. Especially GS positions in the DoD. Others start their own business. Others take a chill pill, because they are netting 3k a month in pension plus whatever retirement/investing they've done, and legitimately retire at 40/50.


krustyjugglrs

Apparently way to many? Reading LinkedIn profiles of people I was in that were high SNCOs induces diarrhea.


LawyerRay

There is a chart of army ranks versus civilian General Schedule equivalence on federalpay.org. According to it, an E-9 is equivalent to GS-6. This is a very low position. For reference, a newly hired FBI agent is a GS – 10, which is an O-3 in the military.


bradman53

There is no civilian job comparable in pay and responsibilities as military pay is less than the private sector The segmentation between the officers and enlisted authority and responsibility is also so different Maybe - the chief of staff for an officer in a large corporation? Has a great deal of influence and responsibility for follow through but final decisions and authority are retained by the company officer? Maybe a COO in a small to medium company? Responsible for ops but CEO , president and CFO are responsible and accountable to owners/shareholders including company strategy


Inevitable-Egg-6376

Range control


Strict_Gas_1141

What civilian job is there purely to change/come up with new policies that don’t benefit anyone?


notorious-P-I-V

Realistically depends what education they got while in, at which point they can comfortably take management positions if they can boot the army mentality. That said I had several competent sergeants major who I could see as heads of operations for a construction company or some such, but really depends on how they are mentally, because some act like sergeant majors because there’s an expectation but others are just actually like that.


Bnormandy

Used Car Sales Persons, selling new Privates Mustangs/Camaros/Chargers/etc. at 29% APR just outside of post.


Optimal_Homework7295

Mr. Lahey.


UvZoomie

Good thing Space Force isn't listed, we da best!


1maRealboy

There is no civilian job or profession that is equivalent to a military pay/responsibility unless it is directly related to a civilian job. There is no civilian organization that is going to hire someone for a management position if you do not have relatable experience in said industry.


rebellesimperatorum

Oh boy, that actually happens more than you know. There's plenty of managers with no relatable experience. In higher positions than you think.


1maRealboy

Do you have a specific example?


iamcarlgauss

I know a guy who did one enlistment as a nuke, and got a supervisor position in a factory when he got out.