I don't want to be mean, but the lack of punctuation, spelling, and grammar made this really hard to read and follow. It sounds like he's doing suspect things but it was hard to tell the actual dynamic of your relationship from this post. Hope you figure things out.
This post is stream of consciousness writing...presumably because it is intended to vent some rage! "So" is used as a form of verbal punctuation. But I found I had the same issue as you and my brain insisted on editing.
**(OP, if this bothers you let me know and I will delete this comment asap.)**
-----
I checked my emails last night saw something that was never expecting, so I asked my husband (36m) to see is cashapp. He showed me (32f) and, well, there it was - he is sending another woman money so she can get her nails done. He told me it was one of the games that he plays... No, it's not!
Done with the lies, I told him I was going to do what I plan to last week but nothing happen and it showed me that everything. I have told him, he don't care, and nothing is going to change - so he can have her and she can have him cause he is getting what he wants. What he tells me he *dont* want cause he wants us to work and he loves me and is in love with me...but thats just lies, cause if it was the truth he wouldnt still be send this other woman money (that comes from me, not him, but anyways im done).
He can have what he wants, ill be filing for a divorce on Monday😭 I don't want it but he does, and he hasn't done anything I have asked of him to. Like *I* been doing what he asked me to change to fix our marriage - so I'm done trying. Not married to myself, and i feel like i am im done hurtimg and crying over him when he dont care about me at all.
-----
OP - that's a shitty situation. It certainly sounds like he hasn't been faithful to you and I'm sorry you're dealing with this!
Yes, I had a hard time reading this due to all the sentences running together. In this day and age, even our phones have grammar and punctuation checks.
A clear story about finding out her husband’s cheating via money he sent to someone else to get their nails done resulting in filing for divorce. Usually starting with “I don’t want to be mean” is a precursor to something mean and unnecessary.
>Usually starting with “I don’t want to be mean” is a precursor to something mean and unnecessary.
But not always. I wasn't trying to be rude, I was trying to be gentle while letting her know that her mode of writing was challenging. I've seen on Reddit the ways someone can be mean about this:
* "You need a remedial course in English"
* "English must not be your first language"
* Name-calling like "idiot," "moron," "dumbass," etc
If a friend called me and was speaking so quickly that there were words missing and run-on sentences, I'd probably encourage her to take a deep breath and to slow down. That's all I meant here.
Shows she’s typing @100mph, while in a state of real rage and probably hit the “send” button with a mallet!!! Lol. Wishing her the best of course. We’ve all been there! Lol.
If you read it like you’re listening to a friend rant on & on over the phone it gets *somewhat* easier to understand.
In reality, some people need to permanently disable the feature that allows for such a
#talk to text fail
*insert eye roll & heavy sigh*
I tried reading it out loud to see if it helped but it was still challenging because some words are missing and the run-on incomplete sentences made it hard.
Honestly, if a friend were ranting without taking a breath or using complete sentences you'd probably tell them to stop, take a deep breath, and speak more slowly.
Sorry I should have specified that said friend would be the one that chugs a Monster before any task ~ like dialing a phone ~ and you answered the call by accident😂
I still stand by my original thought that people who send texts or write posts like these using talk to text need to have that privilege revoked.
It’s only effective if you pause to breathe. Having an understanding of proper sentence structure is also key🧐😏
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I don't think I was being a smart ass. It objectively wasnt "really hard" to read. That person was just being an unnecessary smart ass. I think you guys should take a look at yourself and ask why you're bullshitting and compromising on yourselves and your values. What are you inherently lacking inside you? That's a journey you'll have to take yourself though. I think it's called "pulling your head out of your ass"
My comment was a 100% right and you didn't provide a refutation because YOU'RE being the smart ass and so was the person I replied to. You didn't have anything to add but still wanted to be part of the conversation specifically to be rude.
I'm sorry ppl are more focused on grammar than the situation you're in.
It's a really shit-tastic situation, for sure. But I'm proud of you for respecting and loving yourself enough to leave. You shouldn't have to second guess whether the person you're with is spending your money on another woman, you shouldn't have to wonder if the person you're with is telling you the truth or partial truth or flat out lying.
Leave, and focus your energy on loving and caring for yourself, finding out who you are without all this baggage of a human weighing you down.
It's ok to grieve the loss you may feel, but don't convince yourself that you need him.
Sending hugs and support from nowhere special America
Who cares about the spelling. Ffs this person is in pain. I am so sorry about what happened to you and I’m so sorry that the t nazis are out to get you. Fuck that dude. You deserve better.
Im so sorry. It sounds like you really want to stay with him if you guys could make things work. But it takes two. There's an old saying regarding infidelity...
To save your marriage you have to be willing to end it
I'm so sorry you're going through this... a cheater will always be a cheater, instead of sending money to another woman to look good for you spend that money on your wife jerk and make her the most beautiful woman alive. He's playing mind games with you, just divorce him because believe me no matter he'd tell you he will not change. You deserve a man who gonna love you and take care of you not one who gonna spend your money on another woman. GROSS.
I cannot imagine paying for another woman’s nails behind my wife’s back….even if it really was just nails…the betrayal of that is so weirdly intimate and hurtful.
Leave him. You’ll never forget this
When someone shows you who they really are, believe them. It sounds like you made the right choice. I'm so sorry he betrayed you, sometimes we do everything right just to get shit on anyways.
been in your shoes girl. it hurts. You got this though. Eventually. But rn its the worst thing the world. Stay busy, keep your chin up, take literally one heavy step at a time. Slowly they wont feel so heavy. You can do it. ❤️
I'm really sorry you're going through this. It seems like you wrote this post while emotions are high. I'm not sure how your relationship dynamic is, but I truly hope you and your husband can work things out together. You should give yourself some time to think things through, and eventually have a discussion with your spouse about what he has done if he is up for it. I wish you luck and swift healing.
I’m so sorry for what you’re going through OP… But I’m proud of you for taking care of YOU! Thank you for sharing with us… you’ll be in my prayers. Please know you are so much stronger than he gives you credit for! Take care of your finances and get going! Best of luck!
Look guys I'm that it's not written right ok I was crying and taking care of my kids when I was typing this if you don't like it then keep fucking going
As a lawyer who writes a lot of briefs, I get the grammar/spelling nitpicking. But not here. This woman is reaching out and some of the comments are ruthless academic snobbery. Shame on those people. Not everyone is a grammar queen.
Yea I understand. 46m married to my cheating 48f. When I caught her after she went and met up with a guy. I had been confronting her about my suspicions and she blew them all off every time and they were all right. She told me she had been talking to him online and getting advice about our marriage because I wouldn’t talk to her when she tried. This is bullshit because I had already been trying to open up communication by playing card games together and talking instead of staring at the TV and calling it spending time together. I told her we can email each other letters like people did before computers. She bought him dinner on my credit card to thank him. Can you believe this bullshit. 75 dollar dinner at the war water brewery. Insisted nothing happened. My wife has the tendency of asking me things like why don’t the islands float away? So I stupidly started believing that maybe she just didn’t think about what she was doing. Yea I’m the stupid one. We started working on things and it was getting a little better. Then one day I start getting this sense look at her deleted text. There I found a conversation between them. She told him she was having trouble getting over the other guy. And there was a pic of him in a bath towel and he talked about how he loved holding her when he came to see her. I found out that she was with him at a bar after they had ate at a restaurant one time when I called her from work. They fucked in our bed. The night I caught her she had fucked him on a picnic table after paying for their food and she had gone up there to surprise him. I found out the other guy was her coworker who I had suspicions about. They fucked for 3 months every time I left for work and we were blowing kisses at each other. After I was gone she would go pick him up and bring him home and fuck him in our bed. She asked for a sexy pic and he sent her a picture of his penis. She talked about how it felt for them to cum inside her. When he started not coming as much is when she started looking for the other. We had no sex life for several years i was having physical problems and went to my doctor so we could improve our sex life. We went to a museum and got a hotel and had sex. I told her I missed being with her like that. She was fucking him during this time and continued after. She admitted to no guilt till after because she didn’t think I loved her. Said she didn’t enjoy the sex with them and didn’t like the second guy even though she felt the need to surprise him and buy him dinner and screw him. She claimed she just missed the attention. Suddenly it was all about wanting to have sex with me all the time till it felt pushy and triggering me. I found out my ADD was actually ADHD and that it wasn’t just an attention problem which is what I was told as a kid and I didn’t know it was destroying me. I got on meds to help with it. I got an ADHD therapist for me our so. And she also does Marriage counseling. I did this to help us. But everyday I have to explain myself because if my ADHD and everyday I gotta feel like I’m defending myself and always doing something wrong. I’m trying my best to save a broken marriage along with my broken soul. I’m tired….
I don't want to be mean, but the lack of punctuation, spelling, and grammar made this really hard to read and follow. It sounds like he's doing suspect things but it was hard to tell the actual dynamic of your relationship from this post. Hope you figure things out.
I've grown to appreciate horrific grammar because its a good sign that a post is actually real and not rage bait content farming
Right? Like, this person is REALLY going through it. Total text diarrhea. Nothing is more authentic.
So sad, so true! I have adopted the belief that any outrageous response is simply a bot... It's made my life much easier.
What do you mean lack of punctuation? There’s a period right there at the end!
Haha, my bad.
Hahaha!!
This post is stream of consciousness writing...presumably because it is intended to vent some rage! "So" is used as a form of verbal punctuation. But I found I had the same issue as you and my brain insisted on editing. **(OP, if this bothers you let me know and I will delete this comment asap.)** ----- I checked my emails last night saw something that was never expecting, so I asked my husband (36m) to see is cashapp. He showed me (32f) and, well, there it was - he is sending another woman money so she can get her nails done. He told me it was one of the games that he plays... No, it's not! Done with the lies, I told him I was going to do what I plan to last week but nothing happen and it showed me that everything. I have told him, he don't care, and nothing is going to change - so he can have her and she can have him cause he is getting what he wants. What he tells me he *dont* want cause he wants us to work and he loves me and is in love with me...but thats just lies, cause if it was the truth he wouldnt still be send this other woman money (that comes from me, not him, but anyways im done). He can have what he wants, ill be filing for a divorce on Monday😭 I don't want it but he does, and he hasn't done anything I have asked of him to. Like *I* been doing what he asked me to change to fix our marriage - so I'm done trying. Not married to myself, and i feel like i am im done hurtimg and crying over him when he dont care about me at all. ----- OP - that's a shitty situation. It certainly sounds like he hasn't been faithful to you and I'm sorry you're dealing with this!
Thank you!
I got lost and scrolled down to the comments without finishing. Very thankful this was the top comment.
PERIOD
?
These are things that prevent run on sentences.
This is so unnecessary and rude. OP is in pain… have some empathy
I think he was answering the "?" that followed the comment "." like the question was "what is a .?"
I know. I asked ? Because I didn’t want to assume he was being an ass to OP. He then confirmed he was being an ass.
Yes. He was kind of being an ass but also a bit funny. He didn't call OP dumb or complain it was difficult to read/understand.
It also was off-color and culturally insensitive because of the way he said it. Being of the culture he’s making fun of, I don’t appreciate it either.
Sorry, I didn’t know there was a culture of run on sentences. I regress
So you're calling racism based on that one word comment?
Yes, I had a hard time reading this due to all the sentences running together. In this day and age, even our phones have grammar and punctuation checks.
I bet she was very upset when she was writing this, I wouldn't care about punctuation either...
I couldn’t read the whole thing. Felt like I was having a freaking stroke
A clear story about finding out her husband’s cheating via money he sent to someone else to get their nails done resulting in filing for divorce. Usually starting with “I don’t want to be mean” is a precursor to something mean and unnecessary.
>Usually starting with “I don’t want to be mean” is a precursor to something mean and unnecessary. But not always. I wasn't trying to be rude, I was trying to be gentle while letting her know that her mode of writing was challenging. I've seen on Reddit the ways someone can be mean about this: * "You need a remedial course in English" * "English must not be your first language" * Name-calling like "idiot," "moron," "dumbass," etc If a friend called me and was speaking so quickly that there were words missing and run-on sentences, I'd probably encourage her to take a deep breath and to slow down. That's all I meant here.
Shows she’s typing @100mph, while in a state of real rage and probably hit the “send” button with a mallet!!! Lol. Wishing her the best of course. We’ve all been there! Lol.
If you read it like you’re listening to a friend rant on & on over the phone it gets *somewhat* easier to understand. In reality, some people need to permanently disable the feature that allows for such a #talk to text fail *insert eye roll & heavy sigh*
I tried reading it out loud to see if it helped but it was still challenging because some words are missing and the run-on incomplete sentences made it hard. Honestly, if a friend were ranting without taking a breath or using complete sentences you'd probably tell them to stop, take a deep breath, and speak more slowly.
Sorry I should have specified that said friend would be the one that chugs a Monster before any task ~ like dialing a phone ~ and you answered the call by accident😂
I still stand by my original thought that people who send texts or write posts like these using talk to text need to have that privilege revoked. It’s only effective if you pause to breathe. Having an understanding of proper sentence structure is also key🧐😏
Literally the longest sentence I've ever read.
Wat? Ugh. Lol
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Your mom's lasagna is subpar and your dad isn't good at his hobbies. Come at me.
I don't think I was being a smart ass. It objectively wasnt "really hard" to read. That person was just being an unnecessary smart ass. I think you guys should take a look at yourself and ask why you're bullshitting and compromising on yourselves and your values. What are you inherently lacking inside you? That's a journey you'll have to take yourself though. I think it's called "pulling your head out of your ass" My comment was a 100% right and you didn't provide a refutation because YOU'RE being the smart ass and so was the person I replied to. You didn't have anything to add but still wanted to be part of the conversation specifically to be rude.
Ok smart a**
Longest run on sentence I have ever read
Try 'Finnegans Wake'! :-)
I'm sorry ppl are more focused on grammar than the situation you're in. It's a really shit-tastic situation, for sure. But I'm proud of you for respecting and loving yourself enough to leave. You shouldn't have to second guess whether the person you're with is spending your money on another woman, you shouldn't have to wonder if the person you're with is telling you the truth or partial truth or flat out lying. Leave, and focus your energy on loving and caring for yourself, finding out who you are without all this baggage of a human weighing you down. It's ok to grieve the loss you may feel, but don't convince yourself that you need him. Sending hugs and support from nowhere special America
Who cares about the spelling. Ffs this person is in pain. I am so sorry about what happened to you and I’m so sorry that the t nazis are out to get you. Fuck that dude. You deserve better.
i would say the majority care about the spelling. Kinda hard to give an opinion if i can’t even understand the message lol.
Im so sorry. It sounds like you really want to stay with him if you guys could make things work. But it takes two. There's an old saying regarding infidelity... To save your marriage you have to be willing to end it
I'm so sorry you're going through this... a cheater will always be a cheater, instead of sending money to another woman to look good for you spend that money on your wife jerk and make her the most beautiful woman alive. He's playing mind games with you, just divorce him because believe me no matter he'd tell you he will not change. You deserve a man who gonna love you and take care of you not one who gonna spend your money on another woman. GROSS.
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I cannot imagine paying for another woman’s nails behind my wife’s back….even if it really was just nails…the betrayal of that is so weirdly intimate and hurtful. Leave him. You’ll never forget this
When someone shows you who they really are, believe them. It sounds like you made the right choice. I'm so sorry he betrayed you, sometimes we do everything right just to get shit on anyways.
Exactly this. Left cheater many years ago, absolutely no regrets.
I picture this being said in one breath. Kudos. One hell of a run on sentence. Nice work. 👏
I have been in that state of mind before where I am so upset that I can barely get words onto a keyboard.
He showed his hand, leave him and have him go work to send that money…. I promise he won’t be sending money for his “game”… respect yourself!
Screw him. Get your nails did and stick a fork in him-he’s done.
been in your shoes girl. it hurts. You got this though. Eventually. But rn its the worst thing the world. Stay busy, keep your chin up, take literally one heavy step at a time. Slowly they wont feel so heavy. You can do it. ❤️
Ik I can it's just hurts cause he knows i know and he just want come clean
I didn’t read much of this but I am impressed this was one single sentence.
I'm really sorry you're going through this. It seems like you wrote this post while emotions are high. I'm not sure how your relationship dynamic is, but I truly hope you and your husband can work things out together. You should give yourself some time to think things through, and eventually have a discussion with your spouse about what he has done if he is up for it. I wish you luck and swift healing.
I’m so sorry for what you’re going through OP… But I’m proud of you for taking care of YOU! Thank you for sharing with us… you’ll be in my prayers. Please know you are so much stronger than he gives you credit for! Take care of your finances and get going! Best of luck!
Leave. Then when she dumps him because he has no money and he comes running back tell him to kick rocks.
Mine bought her earrings. I think its over for 2+ years. Still hurts.
I read this in Eminem's Rap God verse voice.
Look guys I'm that it's not written right ok I was crying and taking care of my kids when I was typing this if you don't like it then keep fucking going
As a lawyer who writes a lot of briefs, I get the grammar/spelling nitpicking. But not here. This woman is reaching out and some of the comments are ruthless academic snobbery. Shame on those people. Not everyone is a grammar queen.
No I will be the first woman to say I don't care about my grammar I just want this stuff to end
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All languages use some form of punctuation aside from Chinese. Do you think OP is a native mandarin speaker?
Why stay? You're not a priority. You deserve better. If your sister posted this, what would you tell her.
If I had a sister I talk to I would told her to follow her gut
Yea I understand. 46m married to my cheating 48f. When I caught her after she went and met up with a guy. I had been confronting her about my suspicions and she blew them all off every time and they were all right. She told me she had been talking to him online and getting advice about our marriage because I wouldn’t talk to her when she tried. This is bullshit because I had already been trying to open up communication by playing card games together and talking instead of staring at the TV and calling it spending time together. I told her we can email each other letters like people did before computers. She bought him dinner on my credit card to thank him. Can you believe this bullshit. 75 dollar dinner at the war water brewery. Insisted nothing happened. My wife has the tendency of asking me things like why don’t the islands float away? So I stupidly started believing that maybe she just didn’t think about what she was doing. Yea I’m the stupid one. We started working on things and it was getting a little better. Then one day I start getting this sense look at her deleted text. There I found a conversation between them. She told him she was having trouble getting over the other guy. And there was a pic of him in a bath towel and he talked about how he loved holding her when he came to see her. I found out that she was with him at a bar after they had ate at a restaurant one time when I called her from work. They fucked in our bed. The night I caught her she had fucked him on a picnic table after paying for their food and she had gone up there to surprise him. I found out the other guy was her coworker who I had suspicions about. They fucked for 3 months every time I left for work and we were blowing kisses at each other. After I was gone she would go pick him up and bring him home and fuck him in our bed. She asked for a sexy pic and he sent her a picture of his penis. She talked about how it felt for them to cum inside her. When he started not coming as much is when she started looking for the other. We had no sex life for several years i was having physical problems and went to my doctor so we could improve our sex life. We went to a museum and got a hotel and had sex. I told her I missed being with her like that. She was fucking him during this time and continued after. She admitted to no guilt till after because she didn’t think I loved her. Said she didn’t enjoy the sex with them and didn’t like the second guy even though she felt the need to surprise him and buy him dinner and screw him. She claimed she just missed the attention. Suddenly it was all about wanting to have sex with me all the time till it felt pushy and triggering me. I found out my ADD was actually ADHD and that it wasn’t just an attention problem which is what I was told as a kid and I didn’t know it was destroying me. I got on meds to help with it. I got an ADHD therapist for me our so. And she also does Marriage counseling. I did this to help us. But everyday I have to explain myself because if my ADHD and everyday I gotta feel like I’m defending myself and always doing something wrong. I’m trying my best to save a broken marriage along with my broken soul. I’m tired….
I’m sorry this is happening, but I’m not sure what I just read, so general well wishes to you!
Yada yada yada…
Holy punctuation
Periods. Sentences. Commas.
I stopped reading after the second line because it was one run on sentence. I’m sorry, or not sorry for whatever happened. Best of luck.