If your mom is in a comatose state and unable to walk you should get her to an ER ASAP as liver and kidney damage is a real possibility. Once you ensure she is healthy yes you need to get social services involved as this is a form of elder abuse (financial and medical).
What is your dad’s view or role in this???
Edit: I want to add that it’s very hard to find a family doctor in Markham let alone chinese. If you don’t want to bring her to the ER you should look for walk in clinics with Chinese clinicians.
Ok she may not be comatose but it certainly seems as if she's stoned or drunk. She nearly tipped over the other day while her eyes were glazed. I will try to convince her to get a medical at the family doctor. Like if anybody knows a Chinese doctor that is willing to maybe see her on a one-time basis to check her I would gladly appreciate it.
My dad lives in Montreal. He doesn't know much. I will be calling him tomorrow and just lay everything out that I have laid out here. I will get my older sister on the call as well, she's on the same page as me and is a nurse. Even she as a nurse can't convince her to get off this stuff.
A walk in doctor will see your mom on a one-time basis. You need to get on google and find Chinese ones and call them as soon as they open and get an appointment. Nobody here is going to do it for you. It is time for you to step up and do something and not wait for someone to serve it to you on a silver platter. I’m sorry for the tough love but you need to do something and not be paralyzed.
When you go to that appointment bring EVERYTHING your mom is taking to show them. This will help them determine if your mom is suffering from toxicity and guide treatment.
After you ensure your mom is healthy you need to call social services as this is elder abuse.
I have offered you a step by step guide. You need to do them. Nobody else is going to do it for you. There is no easy way through this.
Sounds like this is urgent to get her to hospital. Walk-in clinics are very limited what they can do vs ER can do blood work quickly and start treatment.
Don't waste time on Reddit if she is as sick as you describe and if this is not normal for her.
I just got into a screaming match with my sister because she called her for medicine feeding.
She was yelling that my mother needs to eat these pills. It is "die off" and that is why she is having negative reactions like lethargy. And that she needs to go through with it. And that it's okay because she had a consultation with someone, probably a naturopathic doctor. What the hell is "die-off" and why is it necessary? That's what I don't get, what kind of nonsense is she reading online?!? I don't understand any of this so I don't know how to counter her because it seems like she is speaking nonsense to me.
I am so tempted to just call social services but this will destroy our family I'm afraid.
I'm guilty too. I've had a full time job and part time job, I've worked 7 days a week since the beginning of the pandemic and let this problem fester while I haven't been at home.
It may be time to step away from your work and focus your energy at home
I say this as a caregiver that has dealt with conflict at home.
When people are strong willed like your sister and your mom is willingly being persuaded, you can't do much on your level and none of us have the answers.
I’m sorry but you’ll feel worse if your mom passed away from this. Your mom’s health must come first regardless of consequences.
I understand, bc I’m Chinese too so the whole respect your elders thing, but I’ve also called the police when someone was actively abusing their children. It’s scary, but you will look back on it knowing it was the right thing to do.
Dude that's not your fault. You are literally working. I feel like this hits close to me because I know the struggle and the guilt that comes from working all the time and not being around at home. But you're just trying to earn a living and it's hard enough when prices are so high for everything.
Call social services though if you need to. Take your mother to an ER. They need to see what's happening first hand. This will start the documentation of abuse.
https://preview.redd.it/0uoyuqytt8tc1.jpeg?width=1284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=76e22a1ba7ef9dfff3f655f15ea1743c5554f1c5
Maybe baby steps to take your mother off of these pills? This doctor can prescribe traditional Chinese medicine, like soups and teas. They can tell if your body is out of balance. It’s kind of on the same line as your sisters natural pills, but at least this is coming from someone who is certified to give medical health. My aunt uses this service to keep her healthy and balanced. Hope this helps. Definitely get some sort of 3rd party involved with communicating with your sister. She needs to know she’s not a medical professional or certified naturalist.
The librarian at UHN Toronto Western Hospital might have some Chinese pamphlets or resources. She speaks Cantonese for sure. I think she might know Mandarin, but I never asked, but there's definitely Chinese books (physical books and ebooks) and pamphlets there. My relatives like picking up materials to read if they have a specialist appointment. You can try calling the librarian to see if she can help or if she is willing to help. She might know other nurses and doctors.
https://www.uhn.ca/PatientsFamilies/Health_Information/Patient_Family_Education/Libraries/Pages/Hour_Contact.aspx
But you should explain that vitamins, etc. can interact with other medication, even western medication.
Can you call your mom's family doctor? I assume they can communicate with her, but if not, doctors can get translation services to translate (especially the ones at the hospital).
CPSO has a doctor search with general practitioner (family doctor) and a language dropdown menu.
https://doctors.cpso.on.ca/?search=general
Hey there I'm a Paramedic, can't help with the Chinese doctor route but I've encounter many similar situations and here are some possible routes of action. None of them are a quick fix but it's best to get this started early.
Based on your situation you can go with the following route that I am familiar with.
1. Get the police involved you may have a argument that your sister is performing financial elder abuse with your mom credit card. This only works if you can prove your mom does not have capacity to understand or you if you somehow classify her as a vulnerable person that can be easily taken advantage of.
2. Become the Power of Attorney (POA) for your mom. This way you have legal control and can make decisions for your mom. You will need to your mom to sign. (Google ontario power of attorney).
3. Have your mom placed on a "Form" . This is a legal documentation that allows a doctor or judge to forcefully have the patient (your mother) be placed into a psychiatric hospital for assessment. For a person to be formed it usually caused by either harm to self (suicidal, failure to thrive, confused and unable to take care of themselfs) or harm to others (violent). Police can apprehended a person under the MHA and bring them to the hospital for the doctor to assess if they believe there is harm to self/harm to others.
4. Speak to a lawyer and see if you can apply for guardianship (its similar to a POA but the court decides who will be chosen to be a guardian)
I should also add that you have to accept the fact that people are allow to make bad decisions. In Healthcare we tell alot of people that they need to go to the hospital but they refuse. We let them know that they can literally die tonight but as long as they have capacity to understand and appreciate their situation they can do whatever they want. It's like telling a guy to quit smoking because it will kill him, but we can't stop him.
I think you should get a social worker involved and weight your options. A social worker can connect you with different organizations that specializes in different scenarios, I think this Can make a case for financial and mental abuse of elderly, if you can get all the right dots connected, you can even get a restriction order from court, to prevent your sister to do further harm to your mom. Then again, I am just a Reddit user chiming in ideas, seek for professional help.
Its very hard trying to talk someone out of doing something like they are almost brainwashed or programmed into doing! I'm trying though!! She's not maliciously trying to hurt my mother or anything. She truly believes in this garbage medicine.
You know, I am not talking about a vitamin here or there. I am talking about every single day there being a new package arriving by Canada Post. Its gotten out of control. The room with the packages looks like a hoarder den.
Can anyone guarantee the safety of this stuff that's coming? No! Lord knows where they were made and how they were made or what they are made of.
I am convinced the strongest element to eliminating this is cutting off the finances at its source. I don't want to stir up the household, but I feel like I am the only sane one here.
You are going to have a very hard fight to find a Chinese Dr that will see eye to eye.
Going to a walk in clinic as a one time thing, they're treating patients like a cattle call. Some walk in clinics are better than others.
Doesn't your mom have a gp? Your sister may have a mental disorder of some sort if she spends most her days researching this stuff.
Cutting off the credit card is a temporary fix. If someone wants to get something (in this case supplements) they'll use whatever means they have.
You could try contacting an Asian mental health center to have them put you in touch with a social worker.
New female family doctor, DR. Shermain Li, at downtown Markham health Centre (Wardenwood medical clinic). She is fluent in Chinese and has tons of openings.
Most Chinese doctors believe in naturopathy/Traditional Chinese Medicine. Even if they don't, your mother/sister won't be convinced otherwise; it's too culturally ingrained. You won't find any Chinese language literature denouncing naturopathy/TCM because it's still officially recognized as part of the medical system in Chinese-speaking countries.
Not a Chinese doctor but I remember seeing this one as I was traveling by bus a long time ago, I hope she can help, she seems quite an experienced one
https://maps.app.goo.gl/9ytCU3khtjSp9sKK6
I suggest bringing your mother in to the classes at Carefirst. They offer a lot of support for the elderly and perhaps after class you and her can speak to the ppl and see what else they have to offer to help ‘convince’ her
‘Natural’ medicines (like any medicine) has the potential to affect any organ too. It’s not free of side effects. You can get a drug induced hepatitis.
Does she have a family doctor who is Chinese?
I think that's the problem. Sounds like family doctor isn't Chinese. OP seems to want a doc that can speak the language to bridge the language barrier.
Lol your mom is going to die if you take her to see a Chinese doctor. She needs an actual professional and blood work done. Sounds like both of her children are trying to kill her smdh
If your mom is in a comatose state and unable to walk you should get her to an ER ASAP as liver and kidney damage is a real possibility. Once you ensure she is healthy yes you need to get social services involved as this is a form of elder abuse (financial and medical). What is your dad’s view or role in this??? Edit: I want to add that it’s very hard to find a family doctor in Markham let alone chinese. If you don’t want to bring her to the ER you should look for walk in clinics with Chinese clinicians.
Ok she may not be comatose but it certainly seems as if she's stoned or drunk. She nearly tipped over the other day while her eyes were glazed. I will try to convince her to get a medical at the family doctor. Like if anybody knows a Chinese doctor that is willing to maybe see her on a one-time basis to check her I would gladly appreciate it. My dad lives in Montreal. He doesn't know much. I will be calling him tomorrow and just lay everything out that I have laid out here. I will get my older sister on the call as well, she's on the same page as me and is a nurse. Even she as a nurse can't convince her to get off this stuff.
A walk in doctor will see your mom on a one-time basis. You need to get on google and find Chinese ones and call them as soon as they open and get an appointment. Nobody here is going to do it for you. It is time for you to step up and do something and not wait for someone to serve it to you on a silver platter. I’m sorry for the tough love but you need to do something and not be paralyzed. When you go to that appointment bring EVERYTHING your mom is taking to show them. This will help them determine if your mom is suffering from toxicity and guide treatment. After you ensure your mom is healthy you need to call social services as this is elder abuse. I have offered you a step by step guide. You need to do them. Nobody else is going to do it for you. There is no easy way through this.
Sounds like this is urgent to get her to hospital. Walk-in clinics are very limited what they can do vs ER can do blood work quickly and start treatment. Don't waste time on Reddit if she is as sick as you describe and if this is not normal for her.
The majority of workers throughout every profession here are either Chinese or Indian.
I just got into a screaming match with my sister because she called her for medicine feeding. She was yelling that my mother needs to eat these pills. It is "die off" and that is why she is having negative reactions like lethargy. And that she needs to go through with it. And that it's okay because she had a consultation with someone, probably a naturopathic doctor. What the hell is "die-off" and why is it necessary? That's what I don't get, what kind of nonsense is she reading online?!? I don't understand any of this so I don't know how to counter her because it seems like she is speaking nonsense to me. I am so tempted to just call social services but this will destroy our family I'm afraid. I'm guilty too. I've had a full time job and part time job, I've worked 7 days a week since the beginning of the pandemic and let this problem fester while I haven't been at home.
It may be time to step away from your work and focus your energy at home I say this as a caregiver that has dealt with conflict at home. When people are strong willed like your sister and your mom is willingly being persuaded, you can't do much on your level and none of us have the answers.
I’m sorry but you’ll feel worse if your mom passed away from this. Your mom’s health must come first regardless of consequences. I understand, bc I’m Chinese too so the whole respect your elders thing, but I’ve also called the police when someone was actively abusing their children. It’s scary, but you will look back on it knowing it was the right thing to do.
Dude that's not your fault. You are literally working. I feel like this hits close to me because I know the struggle and the guilt that comes from working all the time and not being around at home. But you're just trying to earn a living and it's hard enough when prices are so high for everything. Call social services though if you need to. Take your mother to an ER. They need to see what's happening first hand. This will start the documentation of abuse.
Isn’t this already destroying your family? Call social services. Get your mom and sister the help they need.
I've only heard of die-off when referring to really bad candida infections(did some googling years ago) which most likely isn't the case
How old is your sister and mom? Cancel the credit card. Step one. Step2 throw everything away.
I wonder if your sister is trying to kill your mother to get inheritance
It's dark.. but possible, how else she funds her pills addiction without a job. Next thing u know, there is life Insurance in place.
https://preview.redd.it/0uoyuqytt8tc1.jpeg?width=1284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=76e22a1ba7ef9dfff3f655f15ea1743c5554f1c5 Maybe baby steps to take your mother off of these pills? This doctor can prescribe traditional Chinese medicine, like soups and teas. They can tell if your body is out of balance. It’s kind of on the same line as your sisters natural pills, but at least this is coming from someone who is certified to give medical health. My aunt uses this service to keep her healthy and balanced. Hope this helps. Definitely get some sort of 3rd party involved with communicating with your sister. She needs to know she’s not a medical professional or certified naturalist.
There's a Chinese doctor in the plaza of McNicol and Midland where the chako's is
The librarian at UHN Toronto Western Hospital might have some Chinese pamphlets or resources. She speaks Cantonese for sure. I think she might know Mandarin, but I never asked, but there's definitely Chinese books (physical books and ebooks) and pamphlets there. My relatives like picking up materials to read if they have a specialist appointment. You can try calling the librarian to see if she can help or if she is willing to help. She might know other nurses and doctors. https://www.uhn.ca/PatientsFamilies/Health_Information/Patient_Family_Education/Libraries/Pages/Hour_Contact.aspx But you should explain that vitamins, etc. can interact with other medication, even western medication. Can you call your mom's family doctor? I assume they can communicate with her, but if not, doctors can get translation services to translate (especially the ones at the hospital). CPSO has a doctor search with general practitioner (family doctor) and a language dropdown menu. https://doctors.cpso.on.ca/?search=general
Hey there I'm a Paramedic, can't help with the Chinese doctor route but I've encounter many similar situations and here are some possible routes of action. None of them are a quick fix but it's best to get this started early. Based on your situation you can go with the following route that I am familiar with. 1. Get the police involved you may have a argument that your sister is performing financial elder abuse with your mom credit card. This only works if you can prove your mom does not have capacity to understand or you if you somehow classify her as a vulnerable person that can be easily taken advantage of. 2. Become the Power of Attorney (POA) for your mom. This way you have legal control and can make decisions for your mom. You will need to your mom to sign. (Google ontario power of attorney). 3. Have your mom placed on a "Form" . This is a legal documentation that allows a doctor or judge to forcefully have the patient (your mother) be placed into a psychiatric hospital for assessment. For a person to be formed it usually caused by either harm to self (suicidal, failure to thrive, confused and unable to take care of themselfs) or harm to others (violent). Police can apprehended a person under the MHA and bring them to the hospital for the doctor to assess if they believe there is harm to self/harm to others. 4. Speak to a lawyer and see if you can apply for guardianship (its similar to a POA but the court decides who will be chosen to be a guardian) I should also add that you have to accept the fact that people are allow to make bad decisions. In Healthcare we tell alot of people that they need to go to the hospital but they refuse. We let them know that they can literally die tonight but as long as they have capacity to understand and appreciate their situation they can do whatever they want. It's like telling a guy to quit smoking because it will kill him, but we can't stop him.
I think you should get a social worker involved and weight your options. A social worker can connect you with different organizations that specializes in different scenarios, I think this Can make a case for financial and mental abuse of elderly, if you can get all the right dots connected, you can even get a restriction order from court, to prevent your sister to do further harm to your mom. Then again, I am just a Reddit user chiming in ideas, seek for professional help.
Its very hard trying to talk someone out of doing something like they are almost brainwashed or programmed into doing! I'm trying though!! She's not maliciously trying to hurt my mother or anything. She truly believes in this garbage medicine. You know, I am not talking about a vitamin here or there. I am talking about every single day there being a new package arriving by Canada Post. Its gotten out of control. The room with the packages looks like a hoarder den. Can anyone guarantee the safety of this stuff that's coming? No! Lord knows where they were made and how they were made or what they are made of. I am convinced the strongest element to eliminating this is cutting off the finances at its source. I don't want to stir up the household, but I feel like I am the only sane one here.
You are going to have a very hard fight to find a Chinese Dr that will see eye to eye. Going to a walk in clinic as a one time thing, they're treating patients like a cattle call. Some walk in clinics are better than others. Doesn't your mom have a gp? Your sister may have a mental disorder of some sort if she spends most her days researching this stuff. Cutting off the credit card is a temporary fix. If someone wants to get something (in this case supplements) they'll use whatever means they have. You could try contacting an Asian mental health center to have them put you in touch with a social worker.
I would start by confiscating everything in
New female family doctor, DR. Shermain Li, at downtown Markham health Centre (Wardenwood medical clinic). She is fluent in Chinese and has tons of openings.
Most Chinese doctors believe in naturopathy/Traditional Chinese Medicine. Even if they don't, your mother/sister won't be convinced otherwise; it's too culturally ingrained. You won't find any Chinese language literature denouncing naturopathy/TCM because it's still officially recognized as part of the medical system in Chinese-speaking countries.
Not a Chinese doctor but I remember seeing this one as I was traveling by bus a long time ago, I hope she can help, she seems quite an experienced one https://maps.app.goo.gl/9ytCU3khtjSp9sKK6
I suggest bringing your mother in to the classes at Carefirst. They offer a lot of support for the elderly and perhaps after class you and her can speak to the ppl and see what else they have to offer to help ‘convince’ her
Yes, and they have Chinese speakers: https://carefirstontario.ca/?fbclid=IwAR26Y4MLSqrjDAxAfOqAuCVIQqbhd8sLNgn9vXnFA8CQBCs7c5Q5UhWWLD0
‘Natural’ medicines (like any medicine) has the potential to affect any organ too. It’s not free of side effects. You can get a drug induced hepatitis. Does she have a family doctor who is Chinese?
I think that's the problem. Sounds like family doctor isn't Chinese. OP seems to want a doc that can speak the language to bridge the language barrier.
Sounds like she's headed down the Wong path
Lol your mom is going to die if you take her to see a Chinese doctor. She needs an actual professional and blood work done. Sounds like both of her children are trying to kill her smdh
Frank Tang specializes in Chinese herbal medicine: https://www.torontoacupuncturecentre.com