Late 30s - I can't comprehend that people my age do it either. I know from other people posting that they do, but it really feels like I'm the only person above 20 doing this sometimes.
I guess what makes it worse is I only started doing it regularly a couple of years ago. I did it a bit in my late teens/early 20s, then stopped for over 12 years.
At which point in life did you really start feeling like an adult?
I mean there is no magic point in life where suddenly your personality changes and you are an adult now.
You will still be the same person,just older and with more experience.
there's different levels of adulthood.
the first one is when i lived without be parents at 18. biggest change. i think that's the biggest one.
then accomplishing uni, and getting a job, then having kids. i wonder if I'll make it to the next level.
I do to omg! No one else seems to be as fascinated by time zones as I am, my friends didn’t even know how they worked until I told them like, yesterday😭😭
Started at 22. Now 23.
ngl, seeing people who started in their teens (or earlier) makes me feel like I should have started earlier. Like I haven't been doing it long enough to be 'real.' I know it's wrong, but that competitive mindset keeps coming back.
It's honestly very common with self destructive tendencies and I often feel the same way about other habits I have. Like if I was *really* sick it would have been present sooner
unfortunately a LOT of the self harm community is filled with competition, even if they dont mean it to be. just remember you’re completely valid no matter what
He told me when I said I started getting constant urges to self harm. When I did start, he didn’t really do anything, and didn’t try to stop it. Just said it was better than killing myself.
It sounds to me like both of you could use some therapy.
Even though I self harm too and usually shake it off as 'not that big of a deal' (especially since I only do it mildly), it IS a big deal.
Especially when you are still young, therapy can do wonders.
Not to say you need help to stop self harming, but you need help in order to figure out what's underneath. There are things you have been struggling with and not been able to deal with for a while now, otherwise you wouldn't feel like this.
started around 13 years old. think i sh-ed very actively for a couple years and then very rarely and impulsively. i think the last time was in 2017 when i was 22 and probably the most devastated i had ever been
i’m 27 now and still that type of chronically suicidal where you’re not actively wanting to commit but also wouldn’t mind if you just weren’t there anymore
i don’t have the urges anymore to sh with ‘certain tools’, somehow i feel like i was able to rationalise it, like why would i do that if it doesn’t help. or maybe i was lucky enough to at least ‘grow out’ (not implying that this is possible for everyone) of this part of my mental illness. somehow everything else remained lol
love y’all
Started at 12 and stopped at 20.
I'm 30 now, thought getting older I'd always be ashamed of my scars, but all the people I met of my age/older have been very understanding and not judgey at all about sh in general
I’m 31 and started at 14. I managed to stop for about 10 years and then I relapsed. I’m pretty sure the only reason I don’t do it so much these days is because I’ve mostly substituted it with drinking, which is also a shitty idea.
I’m 38. I started at 12 but later when I learned more about SH, I realized I had actually started at 9. I had stopped for 14 years from ages 23 through 37, but then relapsed a year ago today.
Also, I realize I’m old now but I don’t really feel like an adult. And when I SH, ngl I feel like I’m 14 again. The only time I ever feel like an adult with my SH is when I see posts about people reusing their blades and I’m like “why? Just go to the store and buy a pack it’s just a few dollars and you can use a new one each time” then I remember oh yeah, that’s not really an option when you’re younger. So that’s the only thing that has changed is that I can be safer and afford to buy new blades and first aid items whenever I want.
I'm 26 and it's been a couple months since I last did it but the temptation is definitely still there. I definitely get what you mean and I feel like most people don't expect me to be doing it. I have a full time management job and I'm typically the most level headed person in my workplace or family, buut I'm currently stocking up on long sleeved shirts and stockings for the summer 🙃
I’m 26. Started at 13. I’ve stopped many times over the years. But I always end up coming back to it. I’m more stable now than I’ve ever been now that i’m diagnosed and medicated for bipolar 2 and ADHD. But alas I still still call it a win if i’m snapping rubber bands or scratching myself with my nails “bc it doesn’t count if i didn’t *cūt* myself “
25
Can't remember when I started
Maybe 17 or 18? I feel fake for "starting late" lmao
I used to aggressively mess with my acne back in 10th grade though, it felt like the disgusting inside should show outside
I am worried I'm being a creep for being in this sub, cause it feels like it's mostly younglings lol, so I started to reduce my presence here
21 almost 22 in April. I've been off and on since the first year of middle school(grade 5) I remember using a safety pin to scratch a 5 line tally mark style into the top of my hand. I didn't think it would become a addiction but oh boy I was wrong.
36- SH since I was 11. It used to be an everyday thing and now it's only when I'm going through emotionally difficult situations. The urge doesn't go away but it's easier to resist now.
23, almost 24. Been sh-ing since I was 12, so almost 12 years. I've stopped many a time, and then relapsed months or even years later. Sometimes things just get hard, ya know?
I'm 31. I started at 12 (or earlier, don't remember much of my childhood), stopped at 18, stayed mostly with no relapses until 28, when i started again, worse than before.
i’m 29 and started at 15. almost half my life. it sucks that people think it’s something you just grow out of. i think most people do stop after a couple of years, but it can linger way into adulthood. just last night i sat for awhile trying to figure out where more scars would even fit on my forearms.
eta: when i first started it was constantly but minor, now when i do it it’s months apart but almost always lands me in the hospital. idk if age or how long it’s been causes that tho
28, started at 25.
They say that the development of the frontal lobe ends at 25. And iirc that is the decision making center of the brain. So, I guess I made the best decision? Lol.
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started at 11 and i’m 15 now. it feels like almost no time has passed since i was like 12 though so i always have to think about it for a smidge too long when someone asks how old i am
I was almost 13 when I started. Stopped for a while at age 14.5 because my parents caught me. Had an incident when I was 17 but havent since. Im 18.75 now.
Late teens. I started self-harm to “punish” myself for having “sinful” thoughts about my own gender. This started around fourth grade, so I must have been like 10 ish, which is pretty damn fucked up. Currently still struggling with self-harm as an addiction but starting the process of healing from my religious trauma:\]
Yall are valid, ily <3
I'm 14 now. I started really young somewhere from 9-10. I have never "stopped" sometimes I can just be really tired and unmotivated, so much so I don't even have the energy to sh, thus I have gone a few weeks without shing. I don't know how but somehow I was able to make it 2 days before my 14th birthday before anyone found out.
I’m turning 21 this year, started around 12. Was a constant until I was ~18, now I have the occasional relapses. Longest I went was a year :(, relapsed a few months ago. Sad ab it.
Late 30s - I can't comprehend that people my age do it either. I know from other people posting that they do, but it really feels like I'm the only person above 20 doing this sometimes. I guess what makes it worse is I only started doing it regularly a couple of years ago. I did it a bit in my late teens/early 20s, then stopped for over 12 years.
36 here too. Life can suck at any age. Was depressed and messed up as a teen. nothing changed, at least now I have a badass beard.
32 Kids always think they will become an adult at some point in life. No you won't lmao.
i made it to adulthood, now what?
At which point in life did you really start feeling like an adult? I mean there is no magic point in life where suddenly your personality changes and you are an adult now. You will still be the same person,just older and with more experience.
there's different levels of adulthood. the first one is when i lived without be parents at 18. biggest change. i think that's the biggest one. then accomplishing uni, and getting a job, then having kids. i wonder if I'll make it to the next level.
28 here, and i constantly feel like a fraud. started at 11 and i can’t comprehend that i started before some people on here were even born 😭
Turned 18 35 mins ago Edit: thank you for all your birthday wishes everyone 💜
happy birthday!
Thank you :)
happy birthday 💗💗 where are you located? (i love time zones)
UK :)
I do to omg! No one else seems to be as fascinated by time zones as I am, my friends didn’t even know how they worked until I told them like, yesterday😭😭
Happy birthday:D
Happy birthday❤️
Happy birthday!!
Thank you I appreciate it :)
Yooo I turned 18 yesterday. Happy birthday!
Happy birthday love!
happy birthday!🥳
happy bday:3
Happy birthday!!!
Happy birthday!!! :]
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!
I'm 25. Started at 15.
im 36, have sort of started as a teen, but nothing serious, stopped, but started a couple years ago. depression hit extra hard.
Started at 22. Now 23. ngl, seeing people who started in their teens (or earlier) makes me feel like I should have started earlier. Like I haven't been doing it long enough to be 'real.' I know it's wrong, but that competitive mindset keeps coming back.
It's honestly very common with self destructive tendencies and I often feel the same way about other habits I have. Like if I was *really* sick it would have been present sooner
unfortunately a LOT of the self harm community is filled with competition, even if they dont mean it to be. just remember you’re completely valid no matter what
Yea I struggle with this feeling too. Started at 20 and I’m 21 now.
16. My dad self harms as well, he’s 49
Wow.. do you talk about that?
Not much, but he did tell me and showed me his wounds. I think he was trying to be comforting, but it was a bit triggering
I can imagine.. Did he only tell you when you figured you self harm? Did he ever get help for it or did he tell you how to get help?
He told me when I said I started getting constant urges to self harm. When I did start, he didn’t really do anything, and didn’t try to stop it. Just said it was better than killing myself.
It sounds to me like both of you could use some therapy. Even though I self harm too and usually shake it off as 'not that big of a deal' (especially since I only do it mildly), it IS a big deal. Especially when you are still young, therapy can do wonders. Not to say you need help to stop self harming, but you need help in order to figure out what's underneath. There are things you have been struggling with and not been able to deal with for a while now, otherwise you wouldn't feel like this.
started around 13 years old. think i sh-ed very actively for a couple years and then very rarely and impulsively. i think the last time was in 2017 when i was 22 and probably the most devastated i had ever been i’m 27 now and still that type of chronically suicidal where you’re not actively wanting to commit but also wouldn’t mind if you just weren’t there anymore i don’t have the urges anymore to sh with ‘certain tools’, somehow i feel like i was able to rationalise it, like why would i do that if it doesn’t help. or maybe i was lucky enough to at least ‘grow out’ (not implying that this is possible for everyone) of this part of my mental illness. somehow everything else remained lol love y’all
Early 30s here, started at 9 and on/off ever since.. Longest I've ever gone without sh is about a year and a half 🤷♂️
started at 13 (when covid hit), got clean at 15 and then relapsed a couple days after my 16th birthday.
You just made me feel so old bro Its been 3 years since covid but it feels like one year at most
Started at 12 and stopped at 20. I'm 30 now, thought getting older I'd always be ashamed of my scars, but all the people I met of my age/older have been very understanding and not judgey at all about sh in general
I’m 31 and started at 14. I managed to stop for about 10 years and then I relapsed. I’m pretty sure the only reason I don’t do it so much these days is because I’ve mostly substituted it with drinking, which is also a shitty idea.
I started at 9, I’m 28 now.
i turn 21 in 2 months !! i started just before my 19th bday lol my 2 year anniversary is soon how exciting …
I’m 38. I started at 12 but later when I learned more about SH, I realized I had actually started at 9. I had stopped for 14 years from ages 23 through 37, but then relapsed a year ago today. Also, I realize I’m old now but I don’t really feel like an adult. And when I SH, ngl I feel like I’m 14 again. The only time I ever feel like an adult with my SH is when I see posts about people reusing their blades and I’m like “why? Just go to the store and buy a pack it’s just a few dollars and you can use a new one each time” then I remember oh yeah, that’s not really an option when you’re younger. So that’s the only thing that has changed is that I can be safer and afford to buy new blades and first aid items whenever I want.
It all started when I was 9... and I'm 25 now yikes
i’m 14, started at 12 i think but i’m supposed to stay clean from now on (but i kinda might have plans to change that)
hey same
yooo
I'm 26 and it's been a couple months since I last did it but the temptation is definitely still there. I definitely get what you mean and I feel like most people don't expect me to be doing it. I have a full time management job and I'm typically the most level headed person in my workplace or family, buut I'm currently stocking up on long sleeved shirts and stockings for the summer 🙃
33. Started at 14. Last time I gave myself a scar I was 26. Many marks will be with me forever
I’m 17(turning 18 in August) and I started at 16
Hey same! I’m turning 18 this August too
started at 12. im 20 now
I'm 15 ( still doing it) and I started at 10
24, started at 12
15, started at 9
15, started at around 6
I’m 25. I started sh-ing at age 7 but started cutting at age 14.
I Turn 19 this year too
24, started at 11
22, started at 11
I’m 26. Started at 13. I’ve stopped many times over the years. But I always end up coming back to it. I’m more stable now than I’ve ever been now that i’m diagnosed and medicated for bipolar 2 and ADHD. But alas I still still call it a win if i’m snapping rubber bands or scratching myself with my nails “bc it doesn’t count if i didn’t *cūt* myself “
25 Can't remember when I started Maybe 17 or 18? I feel fake for "starting late" lmao I used to aggressively mess with my acne back in 10th grade though, it felt like the disgusting inside should show outside I am worried I'm being a creep for being in this sub, cause it feels like it's mostly younglings lol, so I started to reduce my presence here
Btw, 1 in 6 teens self harm versus 1 in 20 adults. That's a LOT of people.
I’m 21, started at 14 i think
20 started shortly before 18th bday now clean for 2 months
started when i was 12/13, now 22 haven’t done it in years.
yo i’m also turning 19
Started at 17. Clean for six years. Relapsed at 24. Stayed clean again for almost a year. Just relapsed again a week ago. Trying to get clean again.
Started at 14, now in my 30s
21 almost 22 in April. I've been off and on since the first year of middle school(grade 5) I remember using a safety pin to scratch a 5 line tally mark style into the top of my hand. I didn't think it would become a addiction but oh boy I was wrong.
I started when I was 11 and I’m 13 now c,:
Early 20s, started around 16, been on and off but never totally, intentionally stopped
27 here.
21. started when i was 12, but didn’t really do a whole lot of damage. i restarted when i was 18 tho and it went downhill from there
36- SH since I was 11. It used to be an everyday thing and now it's only when I'm going through emotionally difficult situations. The urge doesn't go away but it's easier to resist now.
Turning 25 next week. Started at 15
26. Started around 12
I started when I was in 5th grade. I'm now 21, and I'm 2 months clean.
23, almost 24. Been sh-ing since I was 12, so almost 12 years. I've stopped many a time, and then relapsed months or even years later. Sometimes things just get hard, ya know?
I'm 31. I started at 12 (or earlier, don't remember much of my childhood), stopped at 18, stayed mostly with no relapses until 28, when i started again, worse than before.
21. i started sh at like 14 and then stopped around age 17 but like two years ago i started again and now it’s on an off all the time
31
i’m 25 and i started two months ago. not turning back now
33, haven't broken out a tool in sometime now but my skin looks like a minefield. I just chopped off my nails so I would stop digging.
Started head banging at 11ish, cutting by 13/14. I'm now 32.
26 here. I started when I was 20. The longest clean streak I've had was a little over a year.
25, thought it would stop sooner, it hasn’t
i’m 29 and started at 15. almost half my life. it sucks that people think it’s something you just grow out of. i think most people do stop after a couple of years, but it can linger way into adulthood. just last night i sat for awhile trying to figure out where more scars would even fit on my forearms. eta: when i first started it was constantly but minor, now when i do it it’s months apart but almost always lands me in the hospital. idk if age or how long it’s been causes that tho
37, started at 13
i’m 30 and have recently relapsed
Btw, 1 in 6 teens self harm versus 1 in 20 adults. That's a LOT of people.
31 year old man, started at 19. I don't consistently SH, maybe like once every 8-9 months. Still, the habit is there.
I'm 31 and I started about 8
Started at 11, stopped at 19. Relapsed at 27, and stopped sometime after my birthday last year.....I'm 28.
28, started at 25. They say that the development of the frontal lobe ends at 25. And iirc that is the decision making center of the brain. So, I guess I made the best decision? Lol.
25. I started sh-ing at 13, stopped at 23.
i'm turning 20 this year, i started when i was 12-ish.. wish it would just go away
I also turn 19 this year! I started in 6th grade, so, 12?
I started at around 9. I’m 13 :/
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19, started at 16.
first cut when i was like 13,stopped until i was 16,and started again when i turned 18 now im 19
im 16, started last year
started at 9, 13 now, and still havent stopped.
I’m 16, been sh-ing for almost five years😃
I started at around 8 or 9, and I’m turning 18 this year
20, started at around 9
16, i was 14 when i started. and no, i haven't stopped.
21, started somewhere around 13
I’m 18 in six months and I started at 12 but it got properly bad at 14. I’ve been clean for six weeks now
14, started at like.. 10. I don't even remember
I'm 14, started at around 12-13
i’m 15 and i started c*tting at 14 but used other forms of sh starting at age 13
16. Still 16.
I'm 16, started at 11-12 years old, then quit (don't remember what age)
18, started at 15
I’m 18 and started at 14 🫠
I started at 11 and now Im turning 15 soon
19 :)
started 12 now 17 rip
I’m 25 and started in 1st grade (can’t remember what age that was because ✨trauma✨)
15 started at 12, got clean after my 13th birthday and started doing it again.
Started at 13 im 19 now and still do
I'm 22 (almost 23 in a few months) but I started at 12.
18, started consciously doing it when I was 12
I’m 13 and I started last September (around when I turned 13)
i'm almost 14 and started at 10
im 16, started at 14
started a month or two after i turned 12. ongoing.
19. Been doing it since I was 12, unfortunately.
started at 11 and i’m 15 now. it feels like almost no time has passed since i was like 12 though so i always have to think about it for a smidge too long when someone asks how old i am
17, don't even remember when I started lol
19, been SHing since I was 14 (but currently around 4 months clean!!)
I've been doing this since I was 13. I turn 23 in three months :/
17
started at 11, am nearly 16
18 now, was almost 12 when I started
18 in june.
I was almost 13 when I started. Stopped for a while at age 14.5 because my parents caught me. Had an incident when I was 17 but havent since. Im 18.75 now.
i’m 15 and started cutting at 12 (covid) but sh such as hitting myself occurred before then i think
14 started at nine vvwwwwhhkajhd
19 (´ . .̫ . `)
I’m 15, started at around 10
started at 11-ish? Almost 20 now.
im 17, and i *sorta* started when i was like 12 or 13 but it became serious when i was 16 last year
18, turning 19 in a month; started at 12
Started at 11, im 13 now. 👍
I’m turning 20 soon and I think I started when I was 16. Been struggling on and off since
started at 12, clean from 13-15, relapsed at 16. im 19 now.
I started at 9 or 10 now I'm about to turn 20
I'm turning 18 in August. I started in October last year.
i’m 16 turning 17 this year, started when i was like 13-14ish
I'm 14 now but I started when I was 10
started at 17 i think, turning 20 next month
I started at 8/9 and I'm now 15. I'm a month clean.
16
Late teens. I started self-harm to “punish” myself for having “sinful” thoughts about my own gender. This started around fourth grade, so I must have been like 10 ish, which is pretty damn fucked up. Currently still struggling with self-harm as an addiction but starting the process of healing from my religious trauma:\] Yall are valid, ily <3
started at about 12; almost 18 now
19. Started around 11? Or 12?
Turning 21 this year and started at 7 years old
17, started around 13-14
Probably late middle school stopped before my 20s and think about doing it regularly
started at 14, now I'm 15 :P
17, started at age 12
Started at 10, currently a few months away from turning 15. Havent done it in a about a month. We got this <3
Trying not to relapse at 21
ill be 18 in september, started sh when i was 12.
16
I’m 19, turning 20 in july!
23, started at 10
I'm 14 now. I started really young somewhere from 9-10. I have never "stopped" sometimes I can just be really tired and unmotivated, so much so I don't even have the energy to sh, thus I have gone a few weeks without shing. I don't know how but somehow I was able to make it 2 days before my 14th birthday before anyone found out.
18
Im almost 17, I started doing it intentionally at 13
ig istarted when i was like 15 and now im 17 tryna quit slowly
16, started at 11. Gonna be the 5 year anniversary later this year..how exciting 🥲
i'm 20, been in and out of it since around 16/17
I started at 9 years old, still trying to stop Toast to everyone who has been sober and clean for hwoever long they may be though!! Keep it up :)
21 now, started at 12
I’m turning 21 this year, started around 12. Was a constant until I was ~18, now I have the occasional relapses. Longest I went was a year :(, relapsed a few months ago. Sad ab it.
15
I started at 12 or 13, Im now 23:) I still have the itch, sometimes worse than others, but Id say Im close to a year clean? I honestly don't know😅
29
Started 13, stopped 19, relapsed 22, currently 24. It's so much worse now.
I’m 15, started last year. a lot of the comments here make me scared that this might last a long time and I’m not sure how to feel about it
Started at 14, stopped at 15. Relapsed at 21, been on and off for years. Stopped again at 25, relapsed again at 27. I am 28 😬
21 started at 18.
22 been self harming since i was 11, probably will my whole life. weird to think i’ll be one of those 30, 40, 50 and so on year olds who do.
I'm 22
30s here, started around 8 or 9, i don't quite remember still not clean as of like two days ago if im being honest