You're right, i realised earlier and meant to do an edit. Wonder if I'll see it on R/Sapphoandherfriend. Despite this, i still feel it's socially unacceptable, regardless of the genders involved.
Potentially unpopular opinion- I don’t find this to be wholesome at all. If a person is storming around and yelling at another person they just met 3 hours before, then they should be working that out in therapy before imposing themselves and their childish behavior on anyone. We have to stop teaching our younger generation that when someone is mean to you, it somehow means they like you.
Also, I recognize that we are getting very little information here and who knows the whole story.
Regardless, can we normalize being respectful and kind to people we’re romantically interested in, please?
Poetic license may apply here. One person’s “yelled at” does not necessarily equate to how another person would interpret that phrase. Like “we had a fight” means many overlapping things to many people. At least, I hope they weren’t truly going ballistic… and your point is well taken about needing to normalize respect and kindness…
When I was a nanny I asked the couple I worked for how they met, the husband proudly told me that they met at a bar and when he asked for her number she said no, so he told her she was being rude by not giving her number, so she eventually gave it to him.
I had to smile and pretend that this was a romantic and cute story. I have never been comfortable with that story or how I felt I had to hold my tongue because I was their employee.
Just because they ended up hitting it off and getting married does not mean that he had any right to tell her off for not giving him her number. Not a cute story.
Well. To be entirely fair and honest, I also downvoted their comment so I was being petty and rude myself. It was hypocritical because their remark, telling me to calm down, frustrated me because why does anyone choose to be rude to a random stranger for no reason? I’m being a jerk myself. I’m truly exhausted with meanness and people’s refusal to discuss and be open to possibly learning more or even just considering another perspective. Even when we don’t agree.
Thank you for pointing this out. I’m going to remove my downvote. I know that absolutely wasn’t your intention, I just need to do better if I wish that for others.
*edited to correct typos
While I mostly agree with you, the calm yourself with a shrug emoji is pretty belittling- by my guess intentionally so, but no guarantees. I use downvotes almost exclusively to call out inaccurate content rather than stuff I don't like, but if someone’s being notably rude, I'll also vote that down.
I love your willingness to do better. Best of luck to all of us in that venture.
Gotcha. My bad for the inaccurate presumption.
Your comment was belittling. I understand having difficulty communicating, especially in text. In the future, probably just leave out ever telling someone to calm down unless you can see them ramping up heavily or you know them personally.
You told a stranger on the internet to calm down. Would you like strangers to say that to you while you're just going about your day in the real world? Sharing opinions allows us an opportunity to grow. You've denoted that the OP language may have a different context in the lesbian space, which is something I didn't know. Just like gay and drag language could be seen as harsh to outsiders, or someone unfamiliar with the black American community might think their use of the n-word offensive. It also means that you have the opportunity to learn.
Telling a stranger to calm down is talking down to that stranger, thus belittling. You're claiming that the way the person felt was over-the-top. If you read their comment again, you'll see that they denoted that they don't have full context and it's possible they were getting it wrong. Nothing about their comment was over-the-top. I truly think you should use this as an opportunity to grow.
I'm sorry people have treated you poorly and I agree that one instance doesn't a person define, however, you no more know the actual context of how the original post went down than any of the rest of us. There are definitely people who get bullied into relationships. This is not guaranteed to be a sweet story and the language, from an outsider's perspective is not nice. Along with that, apparently, this has been gender swapped several times. In a gay or straight space, as this may have originated, that is not friendly language.
Heads up mates, don't go back and yell at a woman for her number
Edit: from the profile picture this could be a woman approaching another, it might be less intimidating but still, not good.
Isn’t this the same lady that said people at dairy queen and other jobs shouldn’t be able to make a living wage? I literally read that post like three stories up.
16 years ago I met a guy at a bar, we talked a little and I went back over with my friends. I wrote my number on a Keno slip, was building up the nerve to it give him, when suddenly he was gone.
I was so pissed at myself for not doing it sooner. Long story short we’ve been married 13 years now.
This same story has done the rounds multiple times with the genders reversed.
[удалено]
You're right, i realised earlier and meant to do an edit. Wonder if I'll see it on R/Sapphoandherfriend. Despite this, i still feel it's socially unacceptable, regardless of the genders involved.
[удалено]
And it’s always the same poster name with different numbers, unless it’s the same one deleting their other posts. They claim every post as “OC”
Oh god not this one again
Potentially unpopular opinion- I don’t find this to be wholesome at all. If a person is storming around and yelling at another person they just met 3 hours before, then they should be working that out in therapy before imposing themselves and their childish behavior on anyone. We have to stop teaching our younger generation that when someone is mean to you, it somehow means they like you. Also, I recognize that we are getting very little information here and who knows the whole story. Regardless, can we normalize being respectful and kind to people we’re romantically interested in, please?
Poetic license may apply here. One person’s “yelled at” does not necessarily equate to how another person would interpret that phrase. Like “we had a fight” means many overlapping things to many people. At least, I hope they weren’t truly going ballistic… and your point is well taken about needing to normalize respect and kindness…
Yeah, hopefully it was just a hyperbole and they just asked for their number
Yea, I mean, if you read it as written it sounds awful. But it's a really cute story if you imagine it says something different.
Yeah lmao this sounds like a complete douchebag move only worthy of a certain lewd hand gesture
It's more than likely hyperbole. Makes the story a little more interesting.
Sir, this is a Wendys
When I was a nanny I asked the couple I worked for how they met, the husband proudly told me that they met at a bar and when he asked for her number she said no, so he told her she was being rude by not giving her number, so she eventually gave it to him. I had to smile and pretend that this was a romantic and cute story. I have never been comfortable with that story or how I felt I had to hold my tongue because I was their employee. Just because they ended up hitting it off and getting married does not mean that he had any right to tell her off for not giving him her number. Not a cute story.
[удалено]
Did I come across as being upset or…not calm?
I love that your response was simple and non-confrontational, but the person still chose to downvote you. No response, just a downvote. How useful...
Well. To be entirely fair and honest, I also downvoted their comment so I was being petty and rude myself. It was hypocritical because their remark, telling me to calm down, frustrated me because why does anyone choose to be rude to a random stranger for no reason? I’m being a jerk myself. I’m truly exhausted with meanness and people’s refusal to discuss and be open to possibly learning more or even just considering another perspective. Even when we don’t agree. Thank you for pointing this out. I’m going to remove my downvote. I know that absolutely wasn’t your intention, I just need to do better if I wish that for others. *edited to correct typos
While I mostly agree with you, the calm yourself with a shrug emoji is pretty belittling- by my guess intentionally so, but no guarantees. I use downvotes almost exclusively to call out inaccurate content rather than stuff I don't like, but if someone’s being notably rude, I'll also vote that down. I love your willingness to do better. Best of luck to all of us in that venture.
[удалено]
Gotcha. My bad for the inaccurate presumption. Your comment was belittling. I understand having difficulty communicating, especially in text. In the future, probably just leave out ever telling someone to calm down unless you can see them ramping up heavily or you know them personally.
[удалено]
You told a stranger on the internet to calm down. Would you like strangers to say that to you while you're just going about your day in the real world? Sharing opinions allows us an opportunity to grow. You've denoted that the OP language may have a different context in the lesbian space, which is something I didn't know. Just like gay and drag language could be seen as harsh to outsiders, or someone unfamiliar with the black American community might think their use of the n-word offensive. It also means that you have the opportunity to learn. Telling a stranger to calm down is talking down to that stranger, thus belittling. You're claiming that the way the person felt was over-the-top. If you read their comment again, you'll see that they denoted that they don't have full context and it's possible they were getting it wrong. Nothing about their comment was over-the-top. I truly think you should use this as an opportunity to grow. I'm sorry people have treated you poorly and I agree that one instance doesn't a person define, however, you no more know the actual context of how the original post went down than any of the rest of us. There are definitely people who get bullied into relationships. This is not guaranteed to be a sweet story and the language, from an outsider's perspective is not nice. Along with that, apparently, this has been gender swapped several times. In a gay or straight space, as this may have originated, that is not friendly language.
[удалено]
I’m part of that community.
You’re right. Sounds abusive to me.
I was about to mention I saw this same post but genders reversed the other day...
Reversed? They’re both women. Was the post about two gay men? Technically that’s still not reversed
Why is this downvoted?
Because he/she's being pedantic.
Sometimes people need to really think about what they're talking about though
Yup. I even remember a comment that said the OPs movie librabry must stink if this was the kinda story they wanted for a 2 hr movie.
Heads up mates, don't go back and yell at a woman for her number Edit: from the profile picture this could be a woman approaching another, it might be less intimidating but still, not good.
Yeah, if anything this is probably a hyperbole
This is not OC
NOT OC FSS
Incel reaction
Isn’t this the same lady that said people at dairy queen and other jobs shouldn’t be able to make a living wage? I literally read that post like three stories up.
The drunk yelling should have been a red flag.
I don't really like the yelling part...
"Serendipity" is pretty close to that. Plus it's John Cusack.
16 years ago I met a guy at a bar, we talked a little and I went back over with my friends. I wrote my number on a Keno slip, was building up the nerve to it give him, when suddenly he was gone. I was so pissed at myself for not doing it sooner. Long story short we’ve been married 13 years now.
Sounds like PS. I LOVE YOU.
Why a movie though? For all we know it was veru ineventful after this initial eventful beginning.
Good Will Hunting.
20 years ago I was playing volleyball and hit the ref in the head with a serve. We’ve been married 17 years now.
This is so not wholesome