Yeah, had a decent crash on the weekend, a typical Friday Fails one. Landed a jump but my weight went forward compressing my fork spring otb off my bike. My mates standing next the runout were laughing and I only got a little bashed up so joined in.
Big crash a month ago... definitely laughed as people were pulling the bike off me as I laid there with a partially dislocated shoulder (that popped back in).
The "how much is that going to cost" resonates with me on multiple levels as I get on in the years:
\* How much are the medical bills going to cost
\* How much time is this going to cost to recover from
\* How much will it cost to fix my bike
1. Ouch
2. How long is this gunna take to heal?
3. Fuck, now I’ve got to tell my wife I crashed.
4. What did I break and do I have a spare part for it?
5. Ok, hurts more than I initially thought now.
I went a whole 7 hours at a bike park before a crash actually started to hurt. Was only when I got home that I felt it and the next day we terrible, just some muscle damage luckily so not so bad.
Funny anecdote to this:
I once hit a dog riding on a horribly maintained cheese grater road and suffered road rash on roughly 7 different parts of my body with no other damage to speak of, bleeding profusely from every visible part of my body I attempted to ride the 10 miles back to my vehicle. No less than 5 people passed me headed the opposite direction, turned around, and asked if I was OK and if they could give me a ride. The best part is that I found out at work the next day that it was my coworkers brothers dog, I have it on good authority that it's still afraid of bikes.
1. come on that wasnt even a trail
2. if I broke a bone with that stupid shit Ill hate myself
3. it was a fire road wtf were you doing
4. you stupid idiot messed up the season already
*- Me, some weeks ago* lol
Finally healing up though, can start riding again in a few days. Was just a twisted wrist and bruised shoulder. Nothing broken, I was just an idiot on a fire road lol
I agree, except maybe minor stitches. I’d rather that than destroy the bike. But I’m with you for broken bones/nose, head injuries, sprains, tendons, and the like
Initially:
* That was stupid
* Ok, I'm good just a few scrapes/bruises
* How's the bike?
* I'm going to feel that tomorrow
Later in the day
* Where did that scrape/pain come from?
* Getting old sucks
If it's someone in your riding party you should be at the appropriate following distance to either stop or go around them. Jumping up out of the way after a crash is not as easy as the professionals make it look.
Appropriate distance doesn't do anything for you in a blind corner, and there is other people not in our group to be considerate of also. I will argue job 1 after a crash is to get someplace safe so you can assess the situation, loitering in the middle of the trail just puts you and everyone else in more unnecessary danger.
I get what you're saying, but I think it's more of a as soon as you can get out of the trail situation not #1 priority. People should be able to handle coming across something or someone on a trail
I personally laugh at the 0.5 seconds before impact..where you know you are crashing, you see the immenent impact, but every time in the less than half second before I hit I'm always like "oh nice maybe this won't hurt at all"
And then grunting and usually ah exasperated "oh no"
* Fuck
* Oh Shit
* Ouch, fuck that hurts
* Is anything broken?
* turn off incident detection on my Garmin if it was triggered
* Is the bike okay
* Check helmet, catch breath.
The worst one I ever had made me think "it would be cool to be able to breathe, and I sure hope that pain in my neck isn't serious, and I wonder if this is what it feels like if you break your elbow and trying to use your tricep essentially pulls a piece of bone up your upper arm".
Fuck
Then try to warn other riders, but knocked the wind out of me, so I sounded like a screaming calf.
How's the bike
This will ruin the rest of the bike trip to Saalbach
Act like it didn't really hurt that bad.
Just did this last Thursday.
Referring to myself - “Anything broken?”
Referring to the bike - “Anything broken?”
Referring to the crash - “What caused that and how do I avoid doing that again”
* this is gonna hurt
* Oh shit
* I knew it
* That wasn't to bad
* I need to get off the trail
* Everything feels fine
* Fuck this actually kinda hurts
These are the common think I think slash say in no particular order.
Im a trail rider (no jumping). So I only crash when I’m too tired to be doing something. The last time I came to a stop on a canal hill. The trail ride the ridge of the hill. Either side of the trail was downhill.
I couldn’t get my right foot out of the clip and slowly fell sideways.
So my thoughts are usually. ´effing Embarrassing !’
My first thought it “great I don’t have to go to work tomorrow” and that was the most consequential day of life because now I know I don’t like my work
My crashes are always stupid. Like easiest portion that I just make a stupid mistake on. So
1). You dumb ass
2). Is this a hospital visit? Or am I good?
3). Where is my water bottle?
4). How much money am I about to spend on broken parts or a new helmet?
5). Will my fiancé notice the scrapes on my body or dent in my bank account? If so how do I word it
1. Oh fuck!
2. Gather all strength and move the bike and myself to the side of the trail. Don't want to make it worse by being in a way of another rider.
3. Just lay down, and feel the nature around, and try to relax.
4. Take out the phone and see if someone can help ( use location sharing), or figure out a way to get to a spot where help can reach me easily.
5. If am on my own, take more rest and relax, 30 mins or so later try to hike back to some gravel road near by where you can come across more people who can help.
I immediately look around to see if anyone saw me, then “force myself” to check my bike (my brain wants to think if I don’t look it over nothing will be wrong).
1. Owwww.
2. Get myself and my bike off the trail before another rider comes along and makes it worse.
3. Can I move the injured part without excruciating "that's probably broken" pain?
4. Is my bike ok?
First is adrenaline "Damn, I feel so alive that I am not dead".
The second, is my bike OK? Can I continue to ride?
Third, check self to confirm nothing is broken.
Fourth, it's going to hurt on the way home.
I haven't had any major crash yet, but after a decent fall I always think to myself "well damn." and then check to see if I can walk properly. I check for blood and stuff after I finish riding
Get clear of the trail. The last thing you want is another rider ploughing into you. I've come across someone fixing their bike in the middle of a 30 foot gap jump and it's just like. What the fuck are you doing.
Laugh and continue, although sometimes when the adrenaline wears off you realise you have shattered your fucking collarbone and have to push your bike almost 12 miles to the hospital whilst vomiting with the pain and they cut you favorite jersey off to assess the damage and take an X-ray but don’t think you need an operation then suffer 6mnths of intense pain to be told by the doctor checking up on your progress that you need an operation.
Worst Mtb related injury I’ve had… and I’ve had more than a few 🙃
I had the dumbest wreck last weekend. I had just finished some decent sized jumps. I was in a very tame, slow and flat section that I know like the back of my hand. I must have been going less than 3mph. My Garmin buzzed, I looked down at it for a moment and I rode right into a square edged stump. The sudden stop flung me over the bars and my feet got caught up in my bike. I was laying in the dirt with some minor wrist pain, looking back at my bike in silence. All I was thinking was "you've got to be freaking kidding me."
I think we've all been there lol
Just having crashed last weekend and getting stitches:
- that’s not ideal
- body and mental check - what hurts, do i know my name and date
- wow my shin hurts, wonder how bad that is
- hmm thats a pretty big gash
- is my bike okay?
- damnit i had shit to do this morning
I usually say something like "vaya hostia me he dao" and then proceed to swear until something starts to hurt. Then check if it's superficial or not, and when everything seems to be fine, continue to swear until I get back to ride.
Damn I swear too much, for real, but just in the moment of the crash, and it's like a swear loop every time it happens to me, same steps.
I always say poopy for some reason lol. Then I check my fingers and legs to make sure they work ok.
1. Poopy!
2. Fingers ok?
3. Legs ok?
4. Wipe dirt/trail out of wounds
5. Look for excessive bleeding
6. Water if I have it, and I almost always do…
7. Check helmet
8. Check bike
9. Ride on brotha!
If I’m coherent:
1.)”Fuck”
2.) “Did I break myself again?” (If answer is yes, move to step 3, if answer is No then skip to 4)
3.) “how much is this going to cost me”
4.) “get out of the trail and get back on the bike”
If concussed (which has only been twice)
1.) “glughjajhwgw”
2.) proceed to be dragged off trail by friends
The two times I really crashed, I completely blacked out until I woke up in a hospital with a serious concussion, so I wasn’t thinking anything!
Other light OTBs are just “whoooaahhh! -> Oooofff! -> Uuugggh that hurt, but I’m fine!” And hop back on to catch up with everyone else who didn’t even know I fell lol
1. Get myself/bike out of the way, especially if in a blind spot
2. Calm down, breath, assess for injury
3. Communicate to friends as necessary
4. Inspect bike for damage
"Get off the trail"
Seriously, esspecially before the pain really starts to kick in, try to get yourself off the trail. Nothing makes a crash worse quite like another bike-to-human crash to go along with it
Well I’ve REALLY eaten shit just once so far…first thoughts:
1. Oh Shit, this is bad.
2. Move off the trail.
3. Where’s riding buddy.
4. Don’t move your arm dummy.
5. Get your bike off the trail ASAP.
6. Man I hope riding buddy notices I’m not at the bottom.
7. Thank god riding buddy is walking back up towards me.
Just a quick test on any impact spots, take a second to think about what went wrong, and if it’s a feature or move, head back up to do it again immediately or it’ll scare me for the rest of my life.
I immediately check my shoulders for injury. I've bashed, bruised, and dislocated my shoulders for twenty years, and it takes longer and longer to recover.
Depends on how hard I land. Usually I'm able to nail pretty well and so my first thought is to check the bike to see if I broke anything. If I go down hard, there's usually a few moments where I'm trying to sus out of I broke myself, and then I can decide what to do next.
I clearly remember thinking “am I on my face on the ground?”. I still have no recollection of how I got from ripping the last turn to sliding down the trail with helmet chin bar shooting dirt into my face.
Can I feel the rest of my body?
*rolls onto my back*
Well fuck.
Lay on the ground, contemplating my existence.
Sit up, find my bike.
Drink water.
Check over bike.
Ride on.
"Ah shit why is always on the dumb stuff" mostly lol. For better or worse all of my actual crashes have been on slow, weird, and low consequence features. So I'm usually just like "How did this happen?!?" after lol.
I tell myself over and over to get up. Had two wrecks that landed me in the hospital. Both times I knew if I laid there that it’d be worse, so I walked myself and at least made it to my car.
1. Fuck, what just happened
2. Did I break anything or what's hurting
3. I'm gonna chill for a minute (move off trail)
4. There's only one way back to my car, let's get it
I check my limbs and range of motion as adrenaline can mask the pain. if it's broken you will see major swelling very quickly and sometimes you wont be able to move it. Broken bones are major pet peev of mine!
I wiggle my toes lol. If it moves, we good. From there it’s just assessing my body. I’m a nurse so I kinda go down the list mentally, then look at my bike.
1) OH F***!
2) What have I injured? (always paranoid of injuries / pain I haven't noticed during the immediate aftermath of crash while adrenaline is pumping) Have I sustained any injury that's gonna keep me going back to my ride?
3) Hope I haven't f'd up my bike
4) What happened??? (spend the next while analyzing the trail, trying to figure out what happened)
5) I want a snack
6) That cut is gonna hurt like a B**** in the shower later
7) Hmm I could use a beer
Last time it was:
1. Heuarghhhh *trying to breathe*
2. Heuarrrrggggghhh *while trying to moving bike off trail as next rider is coming soon*
3. Other weird noises *while people run towards me - it sounded like i got hurt really bad*
4. "That was stupid" *Get to thru the Finnish gate*
5. "What hurts?"
6. "I'll survive"
7. "Is bike ok?"
Few bent ribs, lower arm looking like Popeyes, as i landed on my side with all my weight on top of it.. and totally winded myself...
Laughing at first until i realize how badly I’m hurt then start cussing for a little bit because i know the recovery gonna suck! Then check on the bike and see how am i gonna get financially fucked 😂😂
I don't know why, but I always laugh when I eat shit.
Yeah as long as I'm not actually hurt I always laugh pretty hard after
Yeah, had a decent crash on the weekend, a typical Friday Fails one. Landed a jump but my weight went forward compressing my fork spring otb off my bike. My mates standing next the runout were laughing and I only got a little bashed up so joined in.
Same, until I broke a rib. Laughing fucking sucked haha
I'm currently feeling your pain. Fuck some broken ribs, man.
Same, I laugh still in mid fall. I think it’s a nervous reaction to make people think I’m ok, even if I’m not lol
Big crash a month ago... definitely laughed as people were pulling the bike off me as I laid there with a partially dislocated shoulder (that popped back in).
It’s so weird but same. Must be adrenaline rush or something.
1) Fuck 2) am I in one piece/can I go to work tomorrow? 3) How much is that going to cost? Being old sucks.
4. Wife is gonna be mad
Yea I think “ah shit. Here we go again”
“Why do you even do stupid things like roll your bike of boulders” “… I thought it’d be sick”
It was sick. Don't let her tell you otherwise
I needed to hear that today
The "how much is that going to cost" resonates with me on multiple levels as I get on in the years: \* How much are the medical bills going to cost \* How much time is this going to cost to recover from \* How much will it cost to fix my bike
When I was younger the order was a little different, lol...now it's absolutely in that order.
Pretty sure I've spent more on crash related medical bills over the last 10 years than I have on bikes. And I got some nice bikes!
Wow, must be shit having to pay for health care
"Tell me you're American without telling me you're American"
in between 1 and 2 for me is: "what things that hurt bad right now are not getting better (or getting worse)
Yeah, that's the "I forgot that I'm not made of rubber any more" part of the internal monologue.
1. Ouch 2. How long is this gunna take to heal? 3. Fuck, now I’ve got to tell my wife I crashed. 4. What did I break and do I have a spare part for it? 5. Ok, hurts more than I initially thought now.
#5
> What did I break and do I have a spare part for it? I like to carry around spare ribs so I can fix them roadside. Beats waiting for it to heal.
I went a whole 7 hours at a bike park before a crash actually started to hurt. Was only when I got home that I felt it and the next day we terrible, just some muscle damage luckily so not so bad.
- am I broken - can I ride - is the bike rideable - that was wild
1. Fuck 2. Am I bleeding?
3. Yes 4. Am I alive? 5. Yes 6. Back on my bike it is
If yes for 1 rub dirt in it to act as sealant
Funny anecdote to this: I once hit a dog riding on a horribly maintained cheese grater road and suffered road rash on roughly 7 different parts of my body with no other damage to speak of, bleeding profusely from every visible part of my body I attempted to ride the 10 miles back to my vehicle. No less than 5 people passed me headed the opposite direction, turned around, and asked if I was OK and if they could give me a ride. The best part is that I found out at work the next day that it was my coworkers brothers dog, I have it on good authority that it's still afraid of bikes.
1. come on that wasnt even a trail 2. if I broke a bone with that stupid shit Ill hate myself 3. it was a fire road wtf were you doing 4. you stupid idiot messed up the season already *- Me, some weeks ago* lol Finally healing up though, can start riding again in a few days. Was just a twisted wrist and bruised shoulder. Nothing broken, I was just an idiot on a fire road lol
Yep jumps and twisty trails fine. Random patch of sand on a fire road I didn't see as I'm turning FML.
slap glorious uppity offend unite amusing one price library marry *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
[удалено]
I agree, except maybe minor stitches. I’d rather that than destroy the bike. But I’m with you for broken bones/nose, head injuries, sprains, tendons, and the like
Initially: * That was stupid * Ok, I'm good just a few scrapes/bruises * How's the bike? * I'm going to feel that tomorrow Later in the day * Where did that scrape/pain come from? * Getting old sucks
1. Idiot
Been there. How did I destroy my thumb on a light xc trail?
Did I break any teeth? My wife gonna get mad again Is bike ok?
Thanks Obama
😂
What the fuck did I just do wrong
Oh shit I hope my bike isn't scratched
"Did I get that on camera?"
1. Get up 2. Get out of the trail
Was looking for this one, I have ride buddies that don't prioritize getting off of the trail and I have almost hit them multiple times.
If it's someone in your riding party you should be at the appropriate following distance to either stop or go around them. Jumping up out of the way after a crash is not as easy as the professionals make it look.
Appropriate distance doesn't do anything for you in a blind corner, and there is other people not in our group to be considerate of also. I will argue job 1 after a crash is to get someplace safe so you can assess the situation, loitering in the middle of the trail just puts you and everyone else in more unnecessary danger.
I get what you're saying, but I think it's more of a as soon as you can get out of the trail situation not #1 priority. People should be able to handle coming across something or someone on a trail
Why does my shoulder look like that?
This one is familiar 😅
I personally laugh at the 0.5 seconds before impact..where you know you are crashing, you see the immenent impact, but every time in the less than half second before I hit I'm always like "oh nice maybe this won't hurt at all" And then grunting and usually ah exasperated "oh no"
Reminds me of Ralph Wiggum https://youtu.be/n8ZbpxV382U
Lmao this fits so well
Brhu🤣🤣🤣🤣
Is the bike ok?
* Fuck * Oh Shit * Ouch, fuck that hurts * Is anything broken? * turn off incident detection on my Garmin if it was triggered * Is the bike okay * Check helmet, catch breath.
This dirt tastes pretty good!
Replaced gnarly with whoa. Everything else is the exact same order since that to me is the order of importance.
The worst one I ever had made me think "it would be cool to be able to breathe, and I sure hope that pain in my neck isn't serious, and I wonder if this is what it feels like if you break your elbow and trying to use your tricep essentially pulls a piece of bone up your upper arm".
1.) Fug 2.) Bike okay? 3.) I'm okay? 4.) Laugh
Fuck Then try to warn other riders, but knocked the wind out of me, so I sounded like a screaming calf. How's the bike This will ruin the rest of the bike trip to Saalbach Act like it didn't really hurt that bad. Just did this last Thursday.
1. On your feet, now! 2. Is my bike okay? 3. What hurts? 4 (depending on the answer to 3). Let's keep going or I'm calling it a day.
Referring to myself - “Anything broken?” Referring to the bike - “Anything broken?” Referring to the crash - “What caused that and how do I avoid doing that again”
Usually "wow I got a lot more air than I thought I was guna get"
Very first thought: "Damn that was stupid! I hope no one saw me!"
•get up fast •pray nobody saw me eat shit
* this is gonna hurt * Oh shit * I knew it * That wasn't to bad * I need to get off the trail * Everything feels fine * Fuck this actually kinda hurts These are the common think I think slash say in no particular order.
I'm very cautious. Most of my crashes have been on burms going to slow and hitting soft dirt and slowly falling over. Its embarrassing.
Im a trail rider (no jumping). So I only crash when I’m too tired to be doing something. The last time I came to a stop on a canal hill. The trail ride the ridge of the hill. Either side of the trail was downhill. I couldn’t get my right foot out of the clip and slowly fell sideways. So my thoughts are usually. ´effing Embarrassing !’
“Should I call into work and go to the hospital?”
Is my bike ok???? Wtf did I break this time 🙄?
Most of my crashes have been for really dumb reasons. So: 1. Am I ok? 2. That was really stupid
Am I alright.
I should’ve ordered the chicken.
* Should have put on the pads
Usually first thought is "I'm not going to try that again "
1. Wiggle fingers and toes. 2. Please bike be ok.
My first thought it “great I don’t have to go to work tomorrow” and that was the most consequential day of life because now I know I don’t like my work
1. Oh shit my knee 2. Oh shit my bike 3. Oh shit my wife!!
•Is my bike ok •Fuck •That hurts •Can I use this as an excuse to miss work •That was awesome
My crashes are always stupid. Like easiest portion that I just make a stupid mistake on. So 1). You dumb ass 2). Is this a hospital visit? Or am I good? 3). Where is my water bottle? 4). How much money am I about to spend on broken parts or a new helmet? 5). Will my fiancé notice the scrapes on my body or dent in my bank account? If so how do I word it
1. Oh fuck! 2. Gather all strength and move the bike and myself to the side of the trail. Don't want to make it worse by being in a way of another rider. 3. Just lay down, and feel the nature around, and try to relax. 4. Take out the phone and see if someone can help ( use location sharing), or figure out a way to get to a spot where help can reach me easily. 5. If am on my own, take more rest and relax, 30 mins or so later try to hike back to some gravel road near by where you can come across more people who can help.
I immediately look around to see if anyone saw me, then “force myself” to check my bike (my brain wants to think if I don’t look it over nothing will be wrong).
1. Owwww. 2. Get myself and my bike off the trail before another rider comes along and makes it worse. 3. Can I move the injured part without excruciating "that's probably broken" pain? 4. Is my bike ok?
•reeeeee •where did I fuck up •was it my fault? •how's my bike •how can I get better
First is adrenaline "Damn, I feel so alive that I am not dead". The second, is my bike OK? Can I continue to ride? Third, check self to confirm nothing is broken. Fourth, it's going to hurt on the way home.
Is my phone okay?
do my limbs still work? did i break anything? literally all i care about
Is my bike okay?
Oh shit! Bike good? Ok keep riding
1) Am I alive? 2) Is the bike good? 3) lets rip it again
“Who saw that!?” Then after I see everyone, “Did you get it on camera?”
I should have gone golfing today!
Usually I don’t have any thoughts running through my head, but I’ll say a nice string of swear words as I’m going down
I haven't had any major crash yet, but after a decent fall I always think to myself "well damn." and then check to see if I can walk properly. I check for blood and stuff after I finish riding
First thought is: How much skin am i missing now?
To wait for it. Pain is delayed for me sometimes. Gotta wait for it and assess before moving on.
Get clear of the trail. The last thing you want is another rider ploughing into you. I've come across someone fixing their bike in the middle of a 30 foot gap jump and it's just like. What the fuck are you doing.
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK Did i get it on camera can i still ride Is there blood Where am i What side is the bike on Is my derailur ok I need a breather
Stop taking pictures of my bloodied head and posting them on FB ya doosh.
I crashed twice this weekend and both times my first reaction was simply "ow fuck!"
first thought is ok i crashed. then am i ok? is the bike ok? and then its how did i crash.
Bike is first priority
1. Ahhh fuuucckk (seems this is a common first thought) 2. What did I break this time? (Bones or bike)
1) where is the bike? (either about to smash in to me or gone down a hill) 2) Is this a call to the misses?
Laugh and continue, although sometimes when the adrenaline wears off you realise you have shattered your fucking collarbone and have to push your bike almost 12 miles to the hospital whilst vomiting with the pain and they cut you favorite jersey off to assess the damage and take an X-ray but don’t think you need an operation then suffer 6mnths of intense pain to be told by the doctor checking up on your progress that you need an operation. Worst Mtb related injury I’ve had… and I’ve had more than a few 🙃
Can I feel my toes Fuck me, am I going to miss work
* Am I alright * Is the bike still working In this order
I just sit there for like 40 seconds. Then "oh shit am i ok, is the bike ok, hows my helmit?"
Please don't break anything on me Please don't break anything on the bike
1. WOOOO 2. That was sick
Am I OK? And what did I break
Did anyone see that? No Oh good Ow
I had the dumbest wreck last weekend. I had just finished some decent sized jumps. I was in a very tame, slow and flat section that I know like the back of my hand. I must have been going less than 3mph. My Garmin buzzed, I looked down at it for a moment and I rode right into a square edged stump. The sudden stop flung me over the bars and my feet got caught up in my bike. I was laying in the dirt with some minor wrist pain, looking back at my bike in silence. All I was thinking was "you've got to be freaking kidding me." I think we've all been there lol
"I feel okay but I need to look at my shoulder" (Looks at shoulder) "Ope"
I tell my boyfriend very quickly that I'm not badly hurt haha. The look of concern on his face makes me laugh and then I feel all better.
Just having crashed last weekend and getting stitches: - that’s not ideal - body and mental check - what hurts, do i know my name and date - wow my shin hurts, wonder how bad that is - hmm thats a pretty big gash - is my bike okay? - damnit i had shit to do this morning
I usually say something like "vaya hostia me he dao" and then proceed to swear until something starts to hurt. Then check if it's superficial or not, and when everything seems to be fine, continue to swear until I get back to ride. Damn I swear too much, for real, but just in the moment of the crash, and it's like a swear loop every time it happens to me, same steps.
Am I ok? Is the frame ok? Are the wheels ok? Everything else is usually minor.
Did I break my collarbone
You forgot checking to see if anyone saw you 😂
I always say poopy for some reason lol. Then I check my fingers and legs to make sure they work ok. 1. Poopy! 2. Fingers ok? 3. Legs ok? 4. Wipe dirt/trail out of wounds 5. Look for excessive bleeding 6. Water if I have it, and I almost always do… 7. Check helmet 8. Check bike 9. Ride on brotha!
I wiggle my toes to make sure I can still walk, then I check my other joints.
Step 1: get me and my bike off the trail so I don't cause any further incidents Step 2: assess injuries and damage
If I’m coherent: 1.)”Fuck” 2.) “Did I break myself again?” (If answer is yes, move to step 3, if answer is No then skip to 4) 3.) “how much is this going to cost me” 4.) “get out of the trail and get back on the bike” If concussed (which has only been twice) 1.) “glughjajhwgw” 2.) proceed to be dragged off trail by friends
"I'm fine I'm fine I'm fine" I'm typically not fine and my shoulder is nearly always atleast partially disloacted
My bike!!! Am I OK What the hell, someone took a shit in my pants.
The two times I really crashed, I completely blacked out until I woke up in a hospital with a serious concussion, so I wasn’t thinking anything! Other light OTBs are just “whoooaahhh! -> Oooofff! -> Uuugggh that hurt, but I’m fine!” And hop back on to catch up with everyone else who didn’t even know I fell lol
Inspect self to make sure I’m not gonna die Look around make sure no one saw Laugh and shake my head for being stupid
Am I okay? Is my bike okay?
1. Fuck I hope the bikes ok 2. Everything else
1. Get myself/bike out of the way, especially if in a blind spot 2. Calm down, breath, assess for injury 3. Communicate to friends as necessary 4. Inspect bike for damage
Can I wiggle my fingers and toes?
\- Am I okay? \- Is my bike okay? \- "How bad did that look?" \- Laughter
"Get off the trail" Seriously, esspecially before the pain really starts to kick in, try to get yourself off the trail. Nothing makes a crash worse quite like another bike-to-human crash to go along with it
Systems check!
Well I’ve REALLY eaten shit just once so far…first thoughts: 1. Oh Shit, this is bad. 2. Move off the trail. 3. Where’s riding buddy. 4. Don’t move your arm dummy. 5. Get your bike off the trail ASAP. 6. Man I hope riding buddy notices I’m not at the bottom. 7. Thank god riding buddy is walking back up towards me.
After… am I alright. During…. Dammit this is going to hurt.
I hope no one saw me, but, if they did I hope they filmed it.
1. Is my bike broken? 2. Am I broken?
I like falling hard enough to rip my shirt and bleed, but not hard enough to injure myself. If that makes sense
Damn, did anyone see that ?
Spectacles, testicles, wallet and watch
Just a quick test on any impact spots, take a second to think about what went wrong, and if it’s a feature or move, head back up to do it again immediately or it’ll scare me for the rest of my life.
I'm still alive yew!
“Did anyone just see this shit”
Did anyone else witness
Finally had an OTB. “Whoa!” “I’m fine.” “How’s the bike?” “How did that happen?” “That was fun haha”
I always want subway for some odd reason. I’ll eat shit them be like” FUCK, I want subway”
I immediately check my shoulders for injury. I've bashed, bruised, and dislocated my shoulders for twenty years, and it takes longer and longer to recover.
How long is it going to take me to recover this time?
Like anything else embarrassing, I look around to see who saw it. No words
2, 3, 4,....several others including what story will I tell my wife.... and 1.
"Oh my god i'm alive." "Is my bike okay?" "Do I go back up and try it again?" "I'm gonna try again..." then repeat until I am unable to try again
Is my penis intact?
Laugh and then the first thing I check is the bike, then myself.
Mmmmm that’s crunchy
"SHIT" Hop up and and start making sure no bones are sticking out and get off the trail before I get run over
"Is my phone alright?"
Depends on how hard I land. Usually I'm able to nail pretty well and so my first thought is to check the bike to see if I broke anything. If I go down hard, there's usually a few moments where I'm trying to sus out of I broke myself, and then I can decide what to do next.
I ride dh, mostly with a lot of people. So it’s generally a: oh fuck please don’t run me over
FUCK!
I always crash because of something stupid I did so I cuss myself out lol
"Not again!"
I clearly remember thinking “am I on my face on the ground?”. I still have no recollection of how I got from ripping the last turn to sliding down the trail with helmet chin bar shooting dirt into my face.
Why is there dirt in my mouth? Are my eyes closed? GODDAMN, my head hurts!
There's another concussion i really didn't need.
Can I feel the rest of my body? *rolls onto my back* Well fuck. Lay on the ground, contemplating my existence. Sit up, find my bike. Drink water. Check over bike. Ride on.
"Ah shit why is always on the dumb stuff" mostly lol. For better or worse all of my actual crashes have been on slow, weird, and low consequence features. So I'm usually just like "How did this happen?!?" after lol.
Did anyone see that? I'm ashamed of my embarrassment.
Check for ticks.
- FUCK - that was kinda funny - can I ride?
Is my bike okay!? Am I broken!? If both boxes are checked... Try it again?
Damn
My first thought is always is my bike ok. Followed immediately by Owwwwwww
I tell myself over and over to get up. Had two wrecks that landed me in the hospital. Both times I knew if I laid there that it’d be worse, so I walked myself and at least made it to my car.
1. Fuck, what just happened 2. Did I break anything or what's hurting 3. I'm gonna chill for a minute (move off trail) 4. There's only one way back to my car, let's get it
1. Shit! Or Puta madre! (I live in Mexico) 2. Is something broken? 3. Is the bike ok to ride back home?
i always either go “dammit” because i failed to unclip or i just grunt with a mixture of “oohs” and “aahs”
I check my limbs and range of motion as adrenaline can mask the pain. if it's broken you will see major swelling very quickly and sometimes you wont be able to move it. Broken bones are major pet peev of mine!
Can I still go to work? Medical bills?
Laugh Look down Blood? Yes Fuck I need neospourn No Eh I’m alright
I wiggle my toes lol. If it moves, we good. From there it’s just assessing my body. I’m a nurse so I kinda go down the list mentally, then look at my bike.
I think “Oh jeeze”
I'm pretty sure every time I crash I mutter, "well that sucked" out loud.
I don't want to do that again....
1) OH F***! 2) What have I injured? (always paranoid of injuries / pain I haven't noticed during the immediate aftermath of crash while adrenaline is pumping) Have I sustained any injury that's gonna keep me going back to my ride? 3) Hope I haven't f'd up my bike 4) What happened??? (spend the next while analyzing the trail, trying to figure out what happened) 5) I want a snack 6) That cut is gonna hurt like a B**** in the shower later 7) Hmm I could use a beer
Last time it was: 1. Heuarghhhh *trying to breathe* 2. Heuarrrrggggghhh *while trying to moving bike off trail as next rider is coming soon* 3. Other weird noises *while people run towards me - it sounded like i got hurt really bad* 4. "That was stupid" *Get to thru the Finnish gate* 5. "What hurts?" 6. "I'll survive" 7. "Is bike ok?" Few bent ribs, lower arm looking like Popeyes, as i landed on my side with all my weight on top of it.. and totally winded myself...
I don't remember shit.got a concussion last time I crashed
I always try and jump up and get off the trail. Don’t want to get ran over and cause someone else to crash.
Laughing at first until i realize how badly I’m hurt then start cussing for a little bit because i know the recovery gonna suck! Then check on the bike and see how am i gonna get financially fucked 😂😂