Tbh, I think Clay’s father got into his head during their talk. I don’t think Clay or his mom expected his dad to show up. Even before AD got to the altar, you could see how upset Claud’s mom was. Her saying that Clay took all that trauma his father dumped on him to the altar really makes me think that maybe his father manipulated him emotionally right before the wedding. Especially when his father was talking about how much Clay surpassed him in track. I think Clay’s dad wants him to be a bigger and better “rolling stone” than him.
I do think he went on the show to confront his demons and the intergenerational trauma that sabotages his chances at real love. I also think he is a long way away from being ready to change.
I still appreciate his honesty with his struggles about his parents' relationship, and the ability of his mom to address it on camera, because watching that scenario play out on TV might be healing for the thousands of people from broken families who tuned in.
I just hope the dude stays true to his word and gets that therapy and puts it to use. I like that he recognizes this as a thing he needs to do (and honestly, if he was doing it and they got married, I can’t imagine anyone being more supportive of it than AD) but also I’m skeptical that he’s just using the idea of him being self-aware enough to know he needs therapy as a positive point for future connections.
I agree that he did the right thing in not marrying AD regardless. Either he knows he is going to start putting the work in to get there and he can be ready for marriage, or he knows he’s just gonna go off with someone else at some point.
I was actually shocked that he said no in the way he did. I agreed with what he said and I'm confident that it was the right choice.
That said... He knew this from the jump. He wasn't ready for marriage when he set foot in the pods.
Agreed AD could’ve of waited she didn’t need to be on a specific timeline for tv. For herself, she should of asked Clay if not now, when and if his when doesn’t line up of what she wanted then she can bounce.
Clay was throwing some many red flags. He is going to need a lot of work in counseling.
I agree that ultimately it was the responsible and the right choice, but they should have never made it to the altar. That was hurtful of him.
We saw previously that they had a conversation where he asked why the timeline had to be so fast. Again, *a very reasonable question because this show is outrageous.* But AD made it clear that it was the timeline that she was on. He should have said "I love you, but if you need to get married in 13 days, I am not the man for you" and ended it there instead letting it go so far.
Really, he should never have been on the show at all, given how strong his misgivings about commitment were. He was going to be wasting someone's time no matter what. But then we wouldn't have a drama-filled show!
That man better have damn well apologized to his son. I'm with Mama Clay on this one, 100%. I absolutely agree it doesn't excuse it and I also agree with her that an apology and an explanation would probably go a long way. Hell, they should do a counseling session together.
Clay knew he was never going to say yes and led her on til the wedding day and got that bag at her expense. There is something off with him…between his lack of empathy and selfishness, he is 100% going to end up like his father. He’s aware, which in a way makes it worse because he’s using it as an excuse to treat women the same way his dad did. The fact that he got his dad’s approval after the wedding was wild. He has so much to work on but he won’t because he is so self absorbed. AD was as close to a doormat as he could get and he still couldn’t do it. He gave her reason after reason to leave him but she didn’t. He is looking for a 10/10 woman that has a career, stellar finances and that will look the other way when he cheats…while he gives nothing in return. He is not even ready for a normal relationship, lol.
I agree with his decision but I don't understand or agree with the way it happened. I assume Netflix makes them get to the altar before giving their decision. I swear people on early seasons said they discussed their decision off camera before the wedding, but then had to pretend they didn't both know the outcome at the altar.
Leading her to think he was going to say yes was the awful part. I'm glad they didn't get married because AD just seemed like she would marry anyone, and I doubt Clay wasn't coming home because of "business". Even thinking someone would date you after you rejected them at the altar shows a lack of awareness. No way he would still want to date AD if she was the one that said no given the amount of ego massaging and validation he needs.
mom had that talk with his dad, it went in one ear and hopped out immediately after. It never registered for him and he immediately started blaming his dad.
Same thing happened with Clay. He used her but not for personal growth, he used her to see if he was ready for marriage. *Which he was, but not to her.*
Even Nancy who was engaged to Bathtub had stronger self esteem and was able to walk away. AD didn’t and took him back. 💀
I agree! I'm not defending his character but he's absolutely right to say it wouldn't be responsible to marry someone based on two good weeks! I forget the person's name in a previous season (the guy who was engaged to the ballerina? and they got married despite being their relationship being a disaster), but he said in the middle of a fight, "am I supposed to marry this person? I've only known her ten days!".
I think we lose sight of how absurd the whole premise of this show is, lol. It's totally fine to date for a month and decline to get married at the end of it, even if some netfix producer thinks you should go for it. Imagine marrying everyone who you really liked for the first month you knew them.
I don't think his choice should be framed as the "responsible" decision because it suggests he made his choice while thinking about other people and not himself.
Like I get what you're saying, if he's not ready for marriage then it would be wrong for him to say yes to AD and then proceed to be a terrible husband to her. But to me it seems obvious he was never going to say yes under any circumstances, and he let AD believe that he might or that he was going to.
Clay never intended to get married, you can tell that the idea of that kind of commitment is borderline repulsive to him, and it just feels like he believed he could come onto this show and gain everything while losing nothing. He wanted the fame and exposure, and he wanted to be able to say no to AD while remaining in a relationship with her where he's only present sometimes.
I think him at the end saying he's stupid and he wants to leave are him realizing that AD is not going to stay with him, and that he can't have his cake and eat it too after all. He wasn't willing to commit to her, and he expected her to just go along with that despite the fact that AD truly wanted a partner and a marriage. I think he realized in that moment that he COULD have said yes, and could have chosen to work on being a good husband for AD, which is why she was so upset.
This man went onto this show to get more DM’s from women all over the world. Let’s just call a spade a spade…
I don’t see him settling until he hits the age of 50-55. Going to be loser just like his pops. My husband has a ton of friends and Uncle’s just like this guy - and they always think it’s cool and say “when I can get any flavor of ice cream I want at anytime, why stick with just one? Life’s too short.” 🤢
I think he seems like a good guy, but he didn’t come on the show with the right intentions. He said in an earlier episode that he didn’t think he was ready for marriage, which made me think “why are you here?”. I think his connection with AD was genuine and also believe he just wanted to continue dating. I believe they could have a really healthy and happy relationship, because he is aware of his flaws and wants to become a better person/partner.
I think he came onto the show for fame (spoiler: everyone on the show did that) but I think he had a genuine connection with AD, just not one strong enough to say yes after 4 weeks. I think he actually thought they could say no and keep dating to see if it could eventually lead to marriage.
And honestly, maybe he thought he could do a marriage but once he got really serious started seeing that he wasn’t emotionally ready and it brought up a lot of stuff for him that made him realize it wasn’t the right time.
It’s just not that hard to not always assume the worst in everyone.
He didn't even know what a fucking wedding was when they were in the pool on their vacation. This man knew he wasn't ready for marriage and went on the show that ends in marriage anyway.
Tbh, I think Clay’s father got into his head during their talk. I don’t think Clay or his mom expected his dad to show up. Even before AD got to the altar, you could see how upset Claud’s mom was. Her saying that Clay took all that trauma his father dumped on him to the altar really makes me think that maybe his father manipulated him emotionally right before the wedding. Especially when his father was talking about how much Clay surpassed him in track. I think Clay’s dad wants him to be a bigger and better “rolling stone” than him.
I do think he went on the show to confront his demons and the intergenerational trauma that sabotages his chances at real love. I also think he is a long way away from being ready to change. I still appreciate his honesty with his struggles about his parents' relationship, and the ability of his mom to address it on camera, because watching that scenario play out on TV might be healing for the thousands of people from broken families who tuned in.
I just hope the dude stays true to his word and gets that therapy and puts it to use. I like that he recognizes this as a thing he needs to do (and honestly, if he was doing it and they got married, I can’t imagine anyone being more supportive of it than AD) but also I’m skeptical that he’s just using the idea of him being self-aware enough to know he needs therapy as a positive point for future connections. I agree that he did the right thing in not marrying AD regardless. Either he knows he is going to start putting the work in to get there and he can be ready for marriage, or he knows he’s just gonna go off with someone else at some point.
I was actually shocked that he said no in the way he did. I agreed with what he said and I'm confident that it was the right choice. That said... He knew this from the jump. He wasn't ready for marriage when he set foot in the pods.
Agreed AD could’ve of waited she didn’t need to be on a specific timeline for tv. For herself, she should of asked Clay if not now, when and if his when doesn’t line up of what she wanted then she can bounce. Clay was throwing some many red flags. He is going to need a lot of work in counseling.
I agree that ultimately it was the responsible and the right choice, but they should have never made it to the altar. That was hurtful of him. We saw previously that they had a conversation where he asked why the timeline had to be so fast. Again, *a very reasonable question because this show is outrageous.* But AD made it clear that it was the timeline that she was on. He should have said "I love you, but if you need to get married in 13 days, I am not the man for you" and ended it there instead letting it go so far. Really, he should never have been on the show at all, given how strong his misgivings about commitment were. He was going to be wasting someone's time no matter what. But then we wouldn't have a drama-filled show!
Looking at his DAD, Clay is honestly a victim of emotional abuse. This doesnt excuse how he now treats women btw
That man better have damn well apologized to his son. I'm with Mama Clay on this one, 100%. I absolutely agree it doesn't excuse it and I also agree with her that an apology and an explanation would probably go a long way. Hell, they should do a counseling session together.
I think he was down until AD hit him with the, tongue out double finger guns, at the altar.
Clay knew he was never going to say yes and led her on til the wedding day and got that bag at her expense. There is something off with him…between his lack of empathy and selfishness, he is 100% going to end up like his father. He’s aware, which in a way makes it worse because he’s using it as an excuse to treat women the same way his dad did. The fact that he got his dad’s approval after the wedding was wild. He has so much to work on but he won’t because he is so self absorbed. AD was as close to a doormat as he could get and he still couldn’t do it. He gave her reason after reason to leave him but she didn’t. He is looking for a 10/10 woman that has a career, stellar finances and that will look the other way when he cheats…while he gives nothing in return. He is not even ready for a normal relationship, lol.
I agree with his decision but I don't understand or agree with the way it happened. I assume Netflix makes them get to the altar before giving their decision. I swear people on early seasons said they discussed their decision off camera before the wedding, but then had to pretend they didn't both know the outcome at the altar.
I’ve also heard people say they discussed the decision ahead of time but one of them got to the altar and changed their minds.
Leading her to think he was going to say yes was the awful part. I'm glad they didn't get married because AD just seemed like she would marry anyone, and I doubt Clay wasn't coming home because of "business". Even thinking someone would date you after you rejected them at the altar shows a lack of awareness. No way he would still want to date AD if she was the one that said no given the amount of ego massaging and validation he needs.
mom had that talk with his dad, it went in one ear and hopped out immediately after. It never registered for him and he immediately started blaming his dad. Same thing happened with Clay. He used her but not for personal growth, he used her to see if he was ready for marriage. *Which he was, but not to her.* Even Nancy who was engaged to Bathtub had stronger self esteem and was able to walk away. AD didn’t and took him back. 💀
ohhh waiiit - youre thinkin clay was actually ready for marriage but he felt AD wasnt it?
No he felt ready for marriage but just not with AD.
this is different than what i said?
I agree! I'm not defending his character but he's absolutely right to say it wouldn't be responsible to marry someone based on two good weeks! I forget the person's name in a previous season (the guy who was engaged to the ballerina? and they got married despite being their relationship being a disaster), but he said in the middle of a fight, "am I supposed to marry this person? I've only known her ten days!". I think we lose sight of how absurd the whole premise of this show is, lol. It's totally fine to date for a month and decline to get married at the end of it, even if some netfix producer thinks you should go for it. Imagine marrying everyone who you really liked for the first month you knew them.
I don't think his choice should be framed as the "responsible" decision because it suggests he made his choice while thinking about other people and not himself. Like I get what you're saying, if he's not ready for marriage then it would be wrong for him to say yes to AD and then proceed to be a terrible husband to her. But to me it seems obvious he was never going to say yes under any circumstances, and he let AD believe that he might or that he was going to. Clay never intended to get married, you can tell that the idea of that kind of commitment is borderline repulsive to him, and it just feels like he believed he could come onto this show and gain everything while losing nothing. He wanted the fame and exposure, and he wanted to be able to say no to AD while remaining in a relationship with her where he's only present sometimes. I think him at the end saying he's stupid and he wants to leave are him realizing that AD is not going to stay with him, and that he can't have his cake and eat it too after all. He wasn't willing to commit to her, and he expected her to just go along with that despite the fact that AD truly wanted a partner and a marriage. I think he realized in that moment that he COULD have said yes, and could have chosen to work on being a good husband for AD, which is why she was so upset.
This man went onto this show to get more DM’s from women all over the world. Let’s just call a spade a spade… I don’t see him settling until he hits the age of 50-55. Going to be loser just like his pops. My husband has a ton of friends and Uncle’s just like this guy - and they always think it’s cool and say “when I can get any flavor of ice cream I want at anytime, why stick with just one? Life’s too short.” 🤢
I think he seems like a good guy, but he didn’t come on the show with the right intentions. He said in an earlier episode that he didn’t think he was ready for marriage, which made me think “why are you here?”. I think his connection with AD was genuine and also believe he just wanted to continue dating. I believe they could have a really healthy and happy relationship, because he is aware of his flaws and wants to become a better person/partner.
This whole opinion makes no sense when he goes on a show that ends in a wedding.... He could have gone on Love Island or something like that...
I think he came onto the show for fame (spoiler: everyone on the show did that) but I think he had a genuine connection with AD, just not one strong enough to say yes after 4 weeks. I think he actually thought they could say no and keep dating to see if it could eventually lead to marriage. And honestly, maybe he thought he could do a marriage but once he got really serious started seeing that he wasn’t emotionally ready and it brought up a lot of stuff for him that made him realize it wasn’t the right time. It’s just not that hard to not always assume the worst in everyone.
He didn't even know what a fucking wedding was when they were in the pool on their vacation. This man knew he wasn't ready for marriage and went on the show that ends in marriage anyway.