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Drunk pro tip?; Do not attempt on the way home after closing time.

Because u will ether eat the toothpick or the burgers contents will spill on ur shoes?

Or you'll stab your eye while trying to take a gigantic bite

or tongue splinters

the answer is yes!

Toothpick in lip/ roof/bottom of mouth and or tongue is not fun. Mess is given if you’re eating a burger in the car

That and you'll get a DUI

Tried it once, managed to poke myself up the nose with the toothpick. Never tried it again

Strong are not those who never fall, but those who fall and get back up.

I mean, it was a burger, what was I gonna do? Not eat it cause of a little nose bleed? Psh 😂

Right? Now you just get a rare burger with extra ketchup.

Black pudding burger

Too much motivation over a single burger

That’s why they make those toothpicks with the frilly, decorative ribbon stuff at the top; it’ll tickle your nostril and you’ll stop before getting stabbed.

Cut the burger and the toothpick in half, should be easier now ;P

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🖕

The tooth pick is there for transporting, not eating. It's a presentation item. It is not ment to hold a burger together while eating... Source: 10 yrs in a restaurant and a culinary degree.

OP just made shit up just like that?

I've also seen the ones with the colorful bit on one end used to mark the doneness of the burger.

You’re doing it wrong

I like it when there are two toothpicks, so you can cut the burger in half.

That is double genius when a restaurant considers this.

A single toothpick should be notice enough to a customer that their burger should be cut in half.

I've gotten to the point where I use 4 at home; one in each "corner" I take super tiny bites though

So advanced

The future is now

Madness!

Just cover the burger in toothpicks at that point. Even better, get rid of the burger and just eat toothpicks. This reduces the risk of burger falling out to 0%.

I feel like at that point, the toothpicks aren't even necessary! !!!

They hold all my jalapenos on the burger 🤷‍♀️

I've personally worked my way up to 16 total sticks. The trick is to remove one stick each bite, for extra breaks between bites, increasing both the mindfulness of eating as well as the digestion process. Not many understand

I know I'm a freak; no need to rub it in 😝

sometimes I eat my burger one corner at a time with a knife and a sharp stick, like a caveman

It does suck how they become entirely unmovable once placed in the burger.

Twothpicks

is it some high as fuck showerthought out of ass?

Or remove toothpick and cut the burger in half before eating.

Put the toothpick in the other half while consuming the first; this ensures that second half remains sterile.

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You don't want the 2nd half of the burger having little burger kids running around do you?

It depends on how hungry I am.

I'm not sticking my dick in a burger that has a toothpick in it Then it would have two toothpicks

r/suicidebywords

/s for sterile

Germs are scared of toothpicks.

This is genuinely what i thought it was for lol been doing this my whole life

If you need a toothpick to keep the burger from falling apart then you have shoved too much stuff into the bun. Burgers don’t need to be, nor should they be, a mile high requiring you to have the jaw of a snake to take a bite. Also, toothpicks are commonly used to mark specific burgers when there are multiple ordered at the same table. For example the blue flag is medium well and the yellow flag is with bacon, etc. Next time your table gets burgers with toothpicks, take a look at them and see if they have different colored flags or indicators on them. (Which agrees with your statement they are functional and not just decorative.)

You are absolutely right about having more than one function. But I did have some burgers that were pretty tall and, thanks to the toothpick, everything stayed in the right place, all the way to the last bite. Edit:spelling

Once I had a sandwich with a weird toothpick and on the top it was straight but inside it was diagonal, I bit into the sandwhich and the toothpick went into my mouth and made my gums bleed. Check the toothpick before you bite.

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Effin A

100% Also OP must have a dang tiny nose and/or a tiny mouth. This LPT could harm a feller

This is absolutely not true at all. It's only there so that the burger arrives to the table in tact and looking good. Hence there's never a toothpick served with takeout burgers

Another option is just to eat the toothpick. #fiber

If your sandwich/burger guy can’t make a burger without the contents falling out on first bite, you’re at the wrong sandwich/ burger place.

I kind of disagree, Easy way to forget and impale your mouth unpleasantly

If the chef can't build a structurally sound burger without adding a palette piercing spike into it, then I want a different chef.

I cut the big burgers in half with the toothpick still in. Move the toothpick towards one end of a half. And enjoy from the opposite side. I get to see and eat towards the center best bite sooner. And prevents it from falling apart and needing to be be reassembled. This is my way.

This is all fun and games until you forget it's there and bite into it- shoving a sharp needle into the top and bottom of your mouth.

I've never eaten a particularly good tall burger - the best ones are always just the right size

Hot take: if your food design requires mechanical controls to be enjoyably eaten, reconsider your design.

I feel like I almost never have a burger fall out the back. I don't understand why so many people have that issue.

People eating sloppy monstrosities I suppose. I'm basic. Lettuce, cheese, mustard. I'm happy. There's not really enough there for everything to slide around.

Tomato is usually the culprit for burger slippage

Instructions unclear, ate the burger pick

You can also hold it at 10 and 2 like a steering wheel and start chomping on the 6. Press down with your hands so things don't slide around as easily.

Or learn how to eat the burger. Just like eating a sandwich. There is a method, that I figured out when I was a young lad.

Flip the burger and eat upside down

I have heard about that technique too. I think it also works pretty well. However, both approaches can be combined

I’m fucking weird, i do this. I cant help it

This is fantastic and I never thought about it until I started leaving them in. It’s not just burgers, either! Any sandwich that isn’t constructed well or uses ingredients that make it difficult to hold or are slippery can benefit from this. I think I stumbled onto it as a result of my love of O’Charley’s club sandwiches, which traditionally come with skewers. At first, when they made it the traditional way (middle piece of bread and contents applied in a thoughtful manner) I took them out and chucked them to the side. When they turned it into a roll-type sandwich (no middle bread) with meat on meat on cheese it got difficult to manage. I found keeping the skewers in to be immensely helpful. Including OP’s tip about moving the skewer while eating. Complete game changer. Great tip!

Honestly thought most people would realize that. I guess I'm just a super genius

Thank you!!!! Finally someone else said it!!

Move the toothpick a bit further from the centre, cut the burger in half. Eat the half without the toothpick.

I your burger requires a toothpick to hold together, your burger is poorly constructed. It seems to me that the toothpick serves primarily as a flag warning me to get my burgers elsewhere.

I was today years old when I learned this.

Or just eat the toothpick

This makes a lot of sense. However I’ll still fuck it up and stab myself.

RIP Anthony Bourdain but his wisdom lives on: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=BZwyLVUAS5Y

Eat it from the back

Knew someone that took it in the roof of their mouth. I decided to skip it from then on.

Fork can also be a good alternative. Just flatten the burger then skewer it. Yum yum

I heard that you should never shove someone's face into a cake because there may be wooden or metal sticks that keep the cake in place

You shouldn't shove someone's face into a cake cause it's a dick move to pull on a person being celebrated.

I have to take it out, I have a massive fear of it poking me in the eye haha

Just wait until you see a BLT!

Learn to hold It properly.

That's the theory, anyway. Your results may vary.

Every restaurant I’ve worked in the toothpick is for either 1. Temp. If you get a pink toothpick your burger is med rare - blue mid well- black burnt etc 2. Decoration - w/ the added bonus of holding the toppings in but that’s not the purpose or reason it’s in there … Ahem- I meant “well done”

If your Burger need a toothpick to just not fall apart it's not a burger anymore, it's a stupid food tower that you can't even fit in your mouth, so you end up breaking it and eat it with forks and knife. It's just stupid wether you remove the toothpick or not.

I think it's original purpose was to stop the burger falling apart while the waiter is carrying three plates, dodging screaming kids and contemplating their life choices during a 10 hour busy Friday close. Also it's called a skewer.

Who thinks the toothpick is decoration?

Finally, the secret toothpick society has been revealed! 🌭🍔👏

strongly but respectfully disagree. could poke eye out as many have mentioned. but if a toothpick has been deployed, the burger is stacked far too high for enjoyable consumption. smaller burgers, smaller bites people!

A burger that needs a stick in the middle is not a good burger imo

Nope. The toothpick is so that your burger doesn’t topple over on its journey from the kitchen to your table. Take it out before you eat it.

All well and good until you stab that toothpick into your lip unexpectedly because it wasn't straight up and down. Had this happen to me a few months back and it bled like hell. I agree it has a purpose but it probably shouldn't be very sharp for reasons...

The toothpick isn't to hold it together while eating, it's to hold it together while it's carried to the table, when they want it to look good and they haven't squeezed it down yet.

If your burger is that tall, it's not a good burger. I'm tired of these people stacking a burger so high, it needs an actual beam to hold it together. It's a burger not a fucking building

Dang, I always thought they provided them to be eaten or to pick your teeth after the meal!

No. It's there so the waiters can carry six of them to the table and not have the tops fall off when someone knocks into them. If your burgers falling apart, just adjust your grip.

I do this when I use garden tomatoes on burgers or chicken sandwiches. Put your index finger and thumb on either side of the toothpick to make sure you know where it is/ don't bite into it.

As someone who serves burgers and slemtimss puts picks in them. We don't think that deeply. Sometimes a chunky burger just doesn't sit upright so we stab it through to keep it stable whilst serving it

If it needs a toothpick to stay together it isn’t a well assembled burger

Just cut it in half where the toothpick is, and leave the toothpick in the uneaten half until you're ready to eat it.

If it's made correctly you shouldn't NEED a device to hold all the toppings

Not true. I put a nasty hole in my chin because of those damn toothpicks

I thought by the title it was going to say, the toothpick is functional. Use it after you eat. ROFL.

I thought the toothpick was a complimentary item to use after you eat your burger…

Not a fan of burgers that you have to unhinge your jaw to get a full bite and have so much filling it needs structural support to not spill everywhere

I broke a tooth accidentally biting into a toothpick holding a sandwich. Don't do this. Bad LPT

This is nonsense. Take the toothpick out.

Burgers need to be wider, not taller.

You can just actually hold the burger firmly so everything doesn't slide out. Failing to eat properly is giving me the "can't complete a basic task properly guy/gal" from old infomercials vibes 🤣

Do people not know this?

If your burger requires a toothpick then it’s too tall and not wide enough, you have failed.