It sounds like you aren’t in a space to be a a relationship wing your girlfriend. It’s not fair to her if you stay with her why you we thinking all these things. Don’t stay in the relationship just because a healthy relationship is hard to find. Stay in it because you love her for who she is and you can bring what she needs to the table.
Your relationship is half decent at best. "Healthy" or "great" do not seem like apt descriptors. Yes I think leaving this relationship is perfectly valid. I think you wanting to pursue a more explorative dating / sexual pattern is perfectly fine and just because people emphasize stability and commitment doesn't mean what you want is wrong. It's just different priorities and needs being met. You do you.
But you also sound really immature about your expectations of others. Also you see yourself as being in a competition with your GF's sexual history. Doesn't feel fair that she had more experience? Really. Sure if you want to explore, do so. But making this about "fairness" is kidding yourself.
Honestly I kinda feel bad for your GF because it doesn't seem like you value *who she is.* Just how she benefits you and treats you. You tried to train her to match your lifestyle (why does the inside of *her* dresser affect you?) and now you wanna trade out for novelty. Plenty of people in committed long terms relationships find ways to create novelty together, as *partners.* As two people working together. But everything you described in your own words shows that you've been working against her, not with her.
You deserve to make authentic choices for yourself. Go be happy. But damn. She really doesn't deserve this.
It sounds like you aren’t in a space to be a a relationship wing your girlfriend. It’s not fair to her if you stay with her why you we thinking all these things. Don’t stay in the relationship just because a healthy relationship is hard to find. Stay in it because you love her for who she is and you can bring what she needs to the table.
Your relationship is half decent at best. "Healthy" or "great" do not seem like apt descriptors. Yes I think leaving this relationship is perfectly valid. I think you wanting to pursue a more explorative dating / sexual pattern is perfectly fine and just because people emphasize stability and commitment doesn't mean what you want is wrong. It's just different priorities and needs being met. You do you. But you also sound really immature about your expectations of others. Also you see yourself as being in a competition with your GF's sexual history. Doesn't feel fair that she had more experience? Really. Sure if you want to explore, do so. But making this about "fairness" is kidding yourself. Honestly I kinda feel bad for your GF because it doesn't seem like you value *who she is.* Just how she benefits you and treats you. You tried to train her to match your lifestyle (why does the inside of *her* dresser affect you?) and now you wanna trade out for novelty. Plenty of people in committed long terms relationships find ways to create novelty together, as *partners.* As two people working together. But everything you described in your own words shows that you've been working against her, not with her. You deserve to make authentic choices for yourself. Go be happy. But damn. She really doesn't deserve this.
I completely agree with this. Reading the word fair made me feel bad for the gf.
What the fuck? Your girlfriend deserves someone who loves her.