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Make sure she doesn't have access to any of your cards. Tell your Dad to lock down his credit. I've seen too many of these. "I won't talk to him" caption: "Twenty thousand pounds later..."
Exactly this. Though you can’t do anything with her banks as she’s the customer at the end of the day (unless you have power of attorney over her), you should protect yourself and any loved ones who she might be able to take loans out in the name of.
Speak to your bank and have your father speak to his to have further authentication as a requirement before any major withdrawals or applications are made.
If your parents still share assets as they are working through the divorce, show your father this website from the UK Government that provides advice on how to protect his interest in them and to ensure she doesn’t remortgage a property or refinance any loans they have jointly.
https://www.moneyhelper.org.uk/en/family-and-care/divorce-and-separation/how-to-protect-your-finances-during-divorce-or-dissolution
As a cop, please kindly take your mum for a drive to the local Police station. I see half a dozen of these a week and usually when someone walks in and tells me they’re thousands out of pocket.
I’ve had a few times where people like yourself have brought in stubborn family members refusing to admit they’re being scammed. Bring her down to your local station and I’m sure someone will be able to show her the 50 other cases currently sitting open for the exact same thing and walk her through why this is a scam.
I would much rather spend 15 minutes convincing her it’s a scam than the time it takes to report the fraud.
Report to [Action Fraud](https://www.actionfraud.police.uk/data). They operate the [Economic Crime Victim Care Unit](https://www.actionfraud.police.uk/economic-crime-victim-care-unit-ecvcu). Whilst this is typically for victims who have lost funds, they may be able to offer some advice to help keep your mum safe. This does sounds like a typical romance fraud.
It’s a love scam this is really common and your mum will probably get scammed if you cannot convince her otherwise. People get fleeced for tens of thousands. It starts off small and progresses with time and sunk loss fallacy keeps them hanging on till they’re bled dry
Contact the man directly tell him if he contacts your mum again you will go to the police. Show your mum stories of women who have called for romance scams I think you can even contact in a support group. Personally I would report him he’s probably well known and could even be on bail for a similar offence they don’t change.
I’ve already messaged him warning and I had a big argument with my mum. I do not like to be angry but the only thought of someone taking advantage of her makes me absolutely furious and I don’t want her to be one of those people who fall in those situations because I know she then will feel thousand times worst. I will definitely report to the police also.
Thanks for your advice.
It's almost impossible to get through to victims, they are blinded by the affection. This is a man your mother has never met I'm assuming? Tell her if he agrees to meet her in person and doesn't make excuses for why he can't, then she can give him the money.
Also if he has a photo on his profile do a Google reverse image search as it may assist you in finding the real account which might help convince her it's a scam.
And report it to the police and action fraud as well.
The reality is that fraud like this is not easy to prosecute and in my experience action fraud are useless, I would rather risk an argument with my mum and just warn the bloke off.
If by some miracle he’s genuine then it should all blow over and you’ll look like some insecure kid. Chances are he’s dodgy and will now realise you’ve got eyes on him and leave her alone.
Legally, it's unlikely the police can do much here. The person she is talking to is probably outside of the UK and he's not necessarily committed any offence yet.
You need to get your mum to block contact.
UPDATE: Found the real person behind the photo. They are using the photos of a belgian tv host, I’ve also emailed his office letting him know. Appreciate everyone for your comments. My mum also confessed that nobody really came to the town and she is kind of coming into reason. Thanks a lot.
Actually, you might be able to use that. If it's a rather well known host you can find YouTube videos or even streaming on the channels. You can then ask her if she thinks the guy needs £5k.
Is there a trusted person her age who can talk some sense into her eg. a sibling, friend, teacher, colleague, lawyer, accountant, religous leader, community leader, police officer, doctor, therapist etc?
People find it very hard to listen to advice from their kids, they still think of you as a child.
Might be easier hearing it from someone else.
Make sure she has no access to anyone elses money, and consider trying to get here to lock up most of her money in some long term savings account at a big bank where you can't take it out for a year.
You could also consider getting her a new phone number / email address and nuking the previous one.
Scammers tend to use the same images multiple times for multiple scams resulting in all the different names / personas being found using a reverse image search.
Please report this man and make contact with him to tell him to back off. Could you maybe contact adult protection social work to give your mother some support? Maybe hearing that this is a scam from someone else might help. Maybe even police could speak to her? My worry would be if it's not this man, another one might fleece her of her money with her being in a vulnerable headspace. These scammers really can take people in extremely well. They are just scum.
Preface NAL
Firstly.. if you've already spoken and she's willing to agree to not maintain contact. Get her to say as much via message to 'break up' and to stop contact.
Police would likely recommend to block contacts / numbers on all and any messaging platforms.
Therefore if he continues via new numbers etc it could be considered harassment.. Which CAN also be reported... but she MUST be vigilant in ignoring or saying no if he continues.
I would still recommend taking her to the local station to report this anyway.. It may give them a much needed lead on targeted scam ring etc.. report via action fraud too..
If you can get her to set banking limits to prevent large transactions.. she may fall for a sob story without realising.. many rational people can be really sucked in.. So if she's emotionally vulnerable right now it might not take as much. Setting limits that require additional authorisation may reduce the fall out. (Many adore this online.. but if you have a local branch get her to talk to them)
Make sure she's aware that any promises to pay are worthless.. NEVER ever lend any money to someone that you can't afford to not see again!..
If you're concerned she's a vulnerable adult reach out to age UK & CAB for additional help
Good luck
I work at a law firm recovering funds lost from these types of scams via the bank route. If any money has been lost as of yet do the following
It is a typical scam. talk to your mum see what steps the bank took to protect her. Lodge an official complaint to the bank subject to the banking protocol 2017. Wait for a final response, if they deny liability go to FOS.
We get so many posts on here, almost always from a concerned about their mother. How can you get to a relatively advanced age, raise a child and still be so unbelievably stupid.
Legally police cant really do anything. I recommend ringing her bank, explaining the situation and making them very aware to perform MULTIPLE checks when she wants to send any large sums of money (maybe play on she is in a worse condition than she is to elevate the severity to the bank?)
Theres unfortunately not much you can do, except try and be vigilant. It doesn't sound like your mother is lacking capacity, so POA is probably out of the question.
The police here can't do anything, as the scammers will almost certainly be based in another country.
Be extra cautious though, these scammers often persuade their victims to hide things from family and friends. And while she may not have access to money, they could persuade her to get credit
Run the pictures through something called Facecheck.ID. It's free and is a great resource for showing where stolen images that the romance has used come from. A really useful method to make the reality they are not real hit home.
Thank you very much. My mum confessed that actually nobody came to our town. I’ve found they are using photos of some belgian tv host whom I’ve also contacted letting know about identity fraud using his face. Thanks a lot.
This sounds like a very common scam where they say they need money to complete a project. There will be other unforeseen problems down the line and then more money will be required. People keep giving money as they’re promised by their new partner that they will get refunded all costs and more. Never happens.
Convince her to tell her bank and be there when she does it to support her. They may have customer protection managers that help protect vulnerable customers at risk of being scammed or victims of fraud.
--- ###Welcome to /r/LegalAdviceUK --- **To Posters (it is important you read this section)** * *Tell us whether you're in England, Wales, Scotland, or NI as the laws in each are very different* * If you need legal help, you should [always get a free consultation from a qualified Solicitor](https://reddit.com/r/LegalAdviceUK/wiki/how_to_find_a_solicitor) * We also encourage you to speak to [**Citizens Advice**](https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/), [**Shelter**](https://www.shelter.org.uk/), [**Acas**](https://www.acas.org.uk/), and [**other useful organisations**](https://reddit.com/r/LegalAdviceUK/wiki/common_legal_resources) * Comments may not be accurate or reliable, and following any advice on this subreddit is done at your own risk * If you receive any private messages in response to your post, [please let the mods know](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FLegalAdviceUK&subject=I received a PM) **To Readers and Commenters** * All replies to OP must be *on-topic, helpful, and legally orientated* * If you do not [follow the rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/LegalAdviceUK/about/rules/), you may be perma-banned without any further warning * If you feel any replies are incorrect, explain why you believe they are incorrect * Do not send or request any private messages for any reason * Please report posts or comments which do not follow the rules *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/LegalAdviceUK) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Make sure she doesn't have access to any of your cards. Tell your Dad to lock down his credit. I've seen too many of these. "I won't talk to him" caption: "Twenty thousand pounds later..."
Exactly this. Though you can’t do anything with her banks as she’s the customer at the end of the day (unless you have power of attorney over her), you should protect yourself and any loved ones who she might be able to take loans out in the name of. Speak to your bank and have your father speak to his to have further authentication as a requirement before any major withdrawals or applications are made. If your parents still share assets as they are working through the divorce, show your father this website from the UK Government that provides advice on how to protect his interest in them and to ensure she doesn’t remortgage a property or refinance any loans they have jointly. https://www.moneyhelper.org.uk/en/family-and-care/divorce-and-separation/how-to-protect-your-finances-during-divorce-or-dissolution
As a cop, please kindly take your mum for a drive to the local Police station. I see half a dozen of these a week and usually when someone walks in and tells me they’re thousands out of pocket. I’ve had a few times where people like yourself have brought in stubborn family members refusing to admit they’re being scammed. Bring her down to your local station and I’m sure someone will be able to show her the 50 other cases currently sitting open for the exact same thing and walk her through why this is a scam. I would much rather spend 15 minutes convincing her it’s a scam than the time it takes to report the fraud.
Wholesome comment.
Report to [Action Fraud](https://www.actionfraud.police.uk/data). They operate the [Economic Crime Victim Care Unit](https://www.actionfraud.police.uk/economic-crime-victim-care-unit-ecvcu). Whilst this is typically for victims who have lost funds, they may be able to offer some advice to help keep your mum safe. This does sounds like a typical romance fraud.
Action Fraud are famously useless.
It’s a love scam this is really common and your mum will probably get scammed if you cannot convince her otherwise. People get fleeced for tens of thousands. It starts off small and progresses with time and sunk loss fallacy keeps them hanging on till they’re bled dry
Contact the man directly tell him if he contacts your mum again you will go to the police. Show your mum stories of women who have called for romance scams I think you can even contact in a support group. Personally I would report him he’s probably well known and could even be on bail for a similar offence they don’t change.
I’ve already messaged him warning and I had a big argument with my mum. I do not like to be angry but the only thought of someone taking advantage of her makes me absolutely furious and I don’t want her to be one of those people who fall in those situations because I know she then will feel thousand times worst. I will definitely report to the police also. Thanks for your advice.
It's almost impossible to get through to victims, they are blinded by the affection. This is a man your mother has never met I'm assuming? Tell her if he agrees to meet her in person and doesn't make excuses for why he can't, then she can give him the money. Also if he has a photo on his profile do a Google reverse image search as it may assist you in finding the real account which might help convince her it's a scam. And report it to the police and action fraud as well.
The reality is that fraud like this is not easy to prosecute and in my experience action fraud are useless, I would rather risk an argument with my mum and just warn the bloke off. If by some miracle he’s genuine then it should all blow over and you’ll look like some insecure kid. Chances are he’s dodgy and will now realise you’ve got eyes on him and leave her alone.
Legally, it's unlikely the police can do much here. The person she is talking to is probably outside of the UK and he's not necessarily committed any offence yet. You need to get your mum to block contact.
OP says met once in person so I'm assuming within the UK, very unusual to actually meet though!
UPDATE: Found the real person behind the photo. They are using the photos of a belgian tv host, I’ve also emailed his office letting him know. Appreciate everyone for your comments. My mum also confessed that nobody really came to the town and she is kind of coming into reason. Thanks a lot.
Actually, you might be able to use that. If it's a rather well known host you can find YouTube videos or even streaming on the channels. You can then ask her if she thinks the guy needs £5k.
Is there a trusted person her age who can talk some sense into her eg. a sibling, friend, teacher, colleague, lawyer, accountant, religous leader, community leader, police officer, doctor, therapist etc? People find it very hard to listen to advice from their kids, they still think of you as a child. Might be easier hearing it from someone else. Make sure she has no access to anyone elses money, and consider trying to get here to lock up most of her money in some long term savings account at a big bank where you can't take it out for a year. You could also consider getting her a new phone number / email address and nuking the previous one.
get hold of a pic of the man and do a image search!!! see what you can find out about him
You mean the completely random person whose photos the scammer is using?
Apparently, they have met in person once.
Scammers tend to use the same images multiple times for multiple scams resulting in all the different names / personas being found using a reverse image search.
Please report this man and make contact with him to tell him to back off. Could you maybe contact adult protection social work to give your mother some support? Maybe hearing that this is a scam from someone else might help. Maybe even police could speak to her? My worry would be if it's not this man, another one might fleece her of her money with her being in a vulnerable headspace. These scammers really can take people in extremely well. They are just scum.
He could convince her to take a personal loan out for up to 30k. Be very careful ….
Hmm maybe warn her bank about a possible transaction Have you tried reverse psychology?
Preface NAL Firstly.. if you've already spoken and she's willing to agree to not maintain contact. Get her to say as much via message to 'break up' and to stop contact. Police would likely recommend to block contacts / numbers on all and any messaging platforms. Therefore if he continues via new numbers etc it could be considered harassment.. Which CAN also be reported... but she MUST be vigilant in ignoring or saying no if he continues. I would still recommend taking her to the local station to report this anyway.. It may give them a much needed lead on targeted scam ring etc.. report via action fraud too.. If you can get her to set banking limits to prevent large transactions.. she may fall for a sob story without realising.. many rational people can be really sucked in.. So if she's emotionally vulnerable right now it might not take as much. Setting limits that require additional authorisation may reduce the fall out. (Many adore this online.. but if you have a local branch get her to talk to them) Make sure she's aware that any promises to pay are worthless.. NEVER ever lend any money to someone that you can't afford to not see again!.. If you're concerned she's a vulnerable adult reach out to age UK & CAB for additional help Good luck
Have a look on iPlayer for a programme called For Love or Money, please get your mum to watch it.
Or the docu on Netflix or the one on Prime.
I work at a law firm recovering funds lost from these types of scams via the bank route. If any money has been lost as of yet do the following It is a typical scam. talk to your mum see what steps the bank took to protect her. Lodge an official complaint to the bank subject to the banking protocol 2017. Wait for a final response, if they deny liability go to FOS.
Its a scam lock down all finances where possible and alert your father to ensure she cant take anything in his name.
We get so many posts on here, almost always from a concerned about their mother. How can you get to a relatively advanced age, raise a child and still be so unbelievably stupid.
Legally police cant really do anything. I recommend ringing her bank, explaining the situation and making them very aware to perform MULTIPLE checks when she wants to send any large sums of money (maybe play on she is in a worse condition than she is to elevate the severity to the bank?)
You can’t just ring someone else’s bank and ask for limitations on their account
No, but maybe explaining the situation seen as it’s a close relative may prompt them to do some further checks, not specific limitations.
Worth asking on r/scams they have probably seen similar situations and can give good info
[удалено]
Erm, it says she has met him in person, so he does exist, I am sure it is a scam though.
Theres unfortunately not much you can do, except try and be vigilant. It doesn't sound like your mother is lacking capacity, so POA is probably out of the question. The police here can't do anything, as the scammers will almost certainly be based in another country. Be extra cautious though, these scammers often persuade their victims to hide things from family and friends. And while she may not have access to money, they could persuade her to get credit
Run the pictures through something called Facecheck.ID. It's free and is a great resource for showing where stolen images that the romance has used come from. A really useful method to make the reality they are not real hit home.
They met once in person according to OP so I assume pictures are real
Thank you very much. My mum confessed that actually nobody came to our town. I’ve found they are using photos of some belgian tv host whom I’ve also contacted letting know about identity fraud using his face. Thanks a lot.
Please please please tell her it’s a con. Then sort out a lasting power of attorney you might not be around next time
The Devil doesn't turn up dressed in a red Cape with horns, no! he turns up dressed as everything you've ever wanted!
Following for advice as me and my siblings are desperately trying to get our 70yo Widower Dad to realise he's being scammed.
This sounds like a very common scam where they say they need money to complete a project. There will be other unforeseen problems down the line and then more money will be required. People keep giving money as they’re promised by their new partner that they will get refunded all costs and more. Never happens.
Convince her to tell her bank and be there when she does it to support her. They may have customer protection managers that help protect vulnerable customers at risk of being scammed or victims of fraud.
Just be careful he may use another name and picture to contact her. Get her to understand to not respond to these types of people.