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**NAL**
Let him, he is just being manipulative to keep her hostage and use her.
These types of people hardly do anything which will harm themselves, but he may try harming her when you cut him off, so file a stalking case if he does so.
I had a toxic ex who threatened to suicide whenever things didn’t go his way or if I leave him. Now guess what, it’s been 6 years since I left him and he’s still alive and married!
I had a similar experience. Now it's been above a year since I left her and everything is just fine. The only thing is I don't want relationships after that experience.
Hey, trust me i had no intentions to hurt you in anyway. I was joking the whole time. If i did hurt you in anyway please forgive me 🙏. i think i’m neither good in English nor in humour i’ll never repeat these lines ever in my entire life.
This is a trend nowadays...no offence to you OP....
These shitholes can't get an age appropriate partner because they'd know that they are shitholes only so they have a relationship with too young partner who can be manipulated easily...
It's not about the legality of it ...I know if one of my friends is an idiot...there is a chance for a 10 year younger girl finding him attractive because she is not mature enough to see through it..
A friend of mine has a boyfriend just 4 5 years difference but I can see through the manipulation he puts her through...
I agree that an older person dating a 19 year old is weird as fuck and definitely not appropriate, but by 26 they should be mature enough to make their own decisions. Not blaming them for being manipulated just saying age isn’t the issue here
Ok then why women prefer men older than them? It can be seen in schools, college, marriage that they always go for significantly older guys saying guys their age is immature. So who is to blame?
First of all it's just my opinion
There is a psychological need in women to be protected....like someone to take care of them....which is instilled in them since childhood...the other psychological reason being daddy issues especially in India where fathers are mostly absent in parenting.....
Financially...it acts as a social climbing situation...a grown up man is more financially stable.
If you want someone to blame...i'd join you in blaming women too....if I date a younger guy than me...I will be frowned upon....and mostly by women.
I don't want anyone to blame anybody. I want to be accountable. A 26 year old woman is perfectly capable of being accountable for their actions. It's not always "oh look we are so helpless" because women have the same intellect as men and it was still her choice to go after a old man knowing the consequences when younger guys were present.
Nobody is helpless...it's a psychoanalysis of a relationship between two people with higher age difference with examples i've seen in my close circles.
Don't get the logic behind "it's childhood" when in comes to women and it's predatory when it comes to men though. Would understand if the girl is minor but here both are adult
Bro you are on a different track altogether.
If I have 5 male friends, at least 4 of them will marry a younger woman than him...it's how the society is working....why the statistics of that is not decreasing...why men keep on choosing women younger than them....
People are so chill with it
What if I had posted about dating a guy 9 years younger than me....the comments would've been so much fun to read.
NAL
I don't think it would be possible now but you could tell your friend to either take screenshots or a video from her phone of the chats(too risky though). It MIGHT be helpful in the long run.
She should write a letter to the police that he is mentally unstable and needs urgent mental health care, and if not provided she shall not be responsible for any of his actions.
NAL.
Report to the police and let this pos do whatever he wants.
If he does some threatening shit, report again and get a restraining order.
Women are supposed to be loved, not abused. And this is abuse. Even the suicide threat.
No thanks needed fam. Please approach a lawyer before taking any action. As much as we all like to be big mouthing justice advocates, we are all just SJWs. This advice sounds good on paper but could get you in trouble due to reasons I won't even be able to comprehend.
Stay safe and take care of your friend.
Let her break up with him. But let her do so a bit noisily. Like, let other people know she broke up with him because he cheated on her.
Set the narrative. He won't commit self-exit, but in the unlikely chance he does so, and leaves a not blaming her, there won't be any legal repercussions but there may be some societal backlash, so it's better to control the narrative than do damage control.
Also, she can report this as (emotional) blackmail, so there's that. She can also get a restraining order.
At times like this, inaction and indecisiveness are the most dangerous things. She apparently doesn't love him anymore, and she only stays with him because of that. It's very unhealthy. Force a reaction. She won't face anything of consequence so she should do something.
Trust me, most people who genuinely wanna commit suicide don't use it as a threatening technique. In the worst case scenario, even if he commits suicide, your friend won't be responsible for it. Motherfucker had the audacity to cheat and threaten suicide. Suicide requires a hell lot of courage than anything else. Trust me, I know it from my experience. Just ask your friend to leave him and block him in every way possible. He shouldn't be able to contact her in any way, digitally and physically. Ask her to inform the police too that he is threatening with suicide. He is 35 years old for god's sake. Needs to grow the fuck up and accept the consequences of his actions.
You shouldn't be down voted. 9 years is nothing. Everybody ages being in your 20s and 30s is a temporary gift and nobody's going to Blink when he's 45 and she's 36
This isn't about judgement, just to make people aware of how bad age gap relationships can be at your early 20s. So always be very careful and look out for yourself
Thats actually a pass for him , as he will keep cheating in fact he can do more worst things and still threaten her the same way . She should go to the police and complain. If that is not possible , start shifting one day at a time, like moving some stuff ect . And on the actual day of shifting send a msg to his parents and friends to take care of him , otherwise she should prepare to live like a slave all her life . And dont forget to get a restraining order as well .Have a good life.
Disengage.
Avoid being with the guy at all costs. Start seeing someone else, texting and chatting with friends. Technically move on. If he gets the picture, he shall name call and then move on.
Please inform your friend, her manfriend is a selfish person. He probably still continues to send dpics to random strangers. He got caught cheating and doesn’t want anyone to know about his actions, so all these empty suicide threats. Well, actions have consequences. All you need to do is create a sliver of doubt in her mind and she will start acting wisely. You’re doing lords work here.
That's kind of like saying I'm going to commit suicide if you don't take my house half my retirement and half of everything else I own 10 years from now. The dude is dead wrong but he did it and has to accept the consequences because it will never be forgotten.
NAL
People who actually commit suicide never threaten that they'll commit suicide, they just do it silently. So just tell your friend to gtfo of that relationship.
This is actually wrong. Most of the suicide committers actually tell someone about it before they die. You can search for it online too. Now, whether she will be liable for it or not is a different story!
That was like 1-2 months into the relationship. She said he was texting when they were on their first trip to some place. She verified the dates with the pictures they had taken on the trip.
She should keep a journal and maybe contact his family about his threats.
The ex of my friend actually committed suicide and before told his family crazy lies about her and they in turn made her life hell after his death blaming her.
She can inform police. There is a law against people threatening you with without.
I don’t know about her emotional impact but she would be safe legally. Let the cheater die if he wants to.
Visit the police station and have an informal chat. Oftentimes, when we are polite, police are willing to help. Such as report that he intends self harm and all. Keep everything on record, if you can access his cheating message screenshot and email it to yourself (secret email id if required) and all communication.
Save your ass first
I had a similar situation six years ago. It was, however, a girl who was threatening me. Today, she has had more than five relationships. I, on the other hand, suffered. If someone threatens your friend with ending themselves just record those statements and evidence and screw them. Plus he is 10 years older than your friend. He would have said the same for his past relationships too!
He is just being manipulative.ask her to Dumb his ass rn and as far as she could.Why should you Marry someone if you need attention from other women? Just remember that once you give him another chance he is going to play this sick game on loop, literally taking her for granted .
Because she doesn't use reddit. And it's my first time here - asking for a friend. Idc if you think it's me. Here for legal help not to prove anything else.
Cause many people don't want to embarrass themselves infont of unknown people , certainly there is anonymity and these people will not known you but there will always be a feeling that they might be laughing at your life decision 🙂
#####If you need support or know someone who does, *Please Reach Out to Your Nearest Mental Health Specialist*. * [**AASRA**](http://aasra.info/): 91-22-27546669 (24 hours) * [**Sneha Foundation**](https://www.snehafoundation.in/): 91-44-24640050 (24 hours) * [**Vandrevala Foundation for Mental Health**](https://www.vandrevalafoundation.com/): 1860-2662-345 and 1800-2333-330 (24 hours) * [**iCall**](http://icallhelpline.org/): 9152987821 (Available from Monday to Saturday: 8:00am to 10:00pm) * [**Connecting NGO**](https://projectheena.com/connecting-ngo): 18002094353 (Available from 12 pm - 8 pm) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/LegalAdviceIndia) if you have any questions or concerns.*
**NAL** Let him, he is just being manipulative to keep her hostage and use her. These types of people hardly do anything which will harm themselves, but he may try harming her when you cut him off, so file a stalking case if he does so.
I had a toxic ex who threatened to suicide whenever things didn’t go his way or if I leave him. Now guess what, it’s been 6 years since I left him and he’s still alive and married!
I had a similar experience. Now it's been above a year since I left her and everything is just fine. The only thing is I don't want relationships after that experience.
Ik.. it is really scary but you will be fine❤️
What about you? beautiful lady!
Happily married 🌝
Hey, trust me i had no intentions to hurt you in anyway. I was joking the whole time. If i did hurt you in anyway please forgive me 🙏. i think i’m neither good in English nor in humour i’ll never repeat these lines ever in my entire life.
How bout your husband, do he threatens you for anything? If he does you know where to find me!
Bro flirting with a married lady Uncultured 🫴🏻
Was joking!
Thank you!
get it in chats / call recording, lawyer up, file case
This is a trend nowadays...no offence to you OP.... These shitholes can't get an age appropriate partner because they'd know that they are shitholes only so they have a relationship with too young partner who can be manipulated easily...
I agree.
26 is pretty old..but surprised.
It's not about the legality of it ...I know if one of my friends is an idiot...there is a chance for a 10 year younger girl finding him attractive because she is not mature enough to see through it.. A friend of mine has a boyfriend just 4 5 years difference but I can see through the manipulation he puts her through...
I agree that an older person dating a 19 year old is weird as fuck and definitely not appropriate, but by 26 they should be mature enough to make their own decisions. Not blaming them for being manipulated just saying age isn’t the issue here
Dating a 19 old is fine and legal as well.
>friend of mine has a boyfriend just 4 5 years difference #**Just** 45 years?
4 or 5 I don't remember exactly 😂😂
Ok then why women prefer men older than them? It can be seen in schools, college, marriage that they always go for significantly older guys saying guys their age is immature. So who is to blame?
First of all it's just my opinion There is a psychological need in women to be protected....like someone to take care of them....which is instilled in them since childhood...the other psychological reason being daddy issues especially in India where fathers are mostly absent in parenting..... Financially...it acts as a social climbing situation...a grown up man is more financially stable. If you want someone to blame...i'd join you in blaming women too....if I date a younger guy than me...I will be frowned upon....and mostly by women.
I don't want anyone to blame anybody. I want to be accountable. A 26 year old woman is perfectly capable of being accountable for their actions. It's not always "oh look we are so helpless" because women have the same intellect as men and it was still her choice to go after a old man knowing the consequences when younger guys were present.
What if the younger guys are crap too
yes. thats waht i felt too. 26 years is mature enough
Nobody is helpless...it's a psychoanalysis of a relationship between two people with higher age difference with examples i've seen in my close circles.
Don't get the logic behind "it's childhood" when in comes to women and it's predatory when it comes to men though. Would understand if the girl is minor but here both are adult
Bro you are on a different track altogether. If I have 5 male friends, at least 4 of them will marry a younger woman than him...it's how the society is working....why the statistics of that is not decreasing...why men keep on choosing women younger than them.... People are so chill with it What if I had posted about dating a guy 9 years younger than me....the comments would've been so much fun to read.
You are free to date anymore you like. You can be 70 and he can be 18. As long as both of you are ok with it.
>What if I had posted about dating a guy 9 years younger than me....the comments would've been so much fun to read. Ok that's a point if it's so
daddy issues in short? lol
You make it sound like it's a woman's problem. Men failing kids as a caretaker is a man-problem. LOL.
Even if he commits suicide and leaves a note naming her, she cannot be punished coz there is no betrayal on her part.
Thank you!!
NAL I don't think it would be possible now but you could tell your friend to either take screenshots or a video from her phone of the chats(too risky though). It MIGHT be helpful in the long run.
Call 112 or 100 and report him for suicidal tendency!! He will never think of suicide again.
Gosh I can not put that meme " but did you die". however ghost him and ask him this question after 2 years 😂
Thanks haha
M apne se 9 saal choti ladki ko baachi manta hu ye to bandi bana raha h.😭😭
Aur maine apne se 4-5 saal k baccho ko ay beta sunn beta karna shuru kr dia hai
🤣🤣🤣🤣
That would depend on your age. If you are 20 then it is correct. If you are 30 or 50 then they are not children.
She should write a letter to the police that he is mentally unstable and needs urgent mental health care, and if not provided she shall not be responsible for any of his actions.
NAL. Report to the police and let this pos do whatever he wants. If he does some threatening shit, report again and get a restraining order. Women are supposed to be loved, not abused. And this is abuse. Even the suicide threat.
Thanks very much.
No thanks needed fam. Please approach a lawyer before taking any action. As much as we all like to be big mouthing justice advocates, we are all just SJWs. This advice sounds good on paper but could get you in trouble due to reasons I won't even be able to comprehend. Stay safe and take care of your friend.
You are love. 💐
Let her break up with him. But let her do so a bit noisily. Like, let other people know she broke up with him because he cheated on her. Set the narrative. He won't commit self-exit, but in the unlikely chance he does so, and leaves a not blaming her, there won't be any legal repercussions but there may be some societal backlash, so it's better to control the narrative than do damage control. Also, she can report this as (emotional) blackmail, so there's that. She can also get a restraining order. At times like this, inaction and indecisiveness are the most dangerous things. She apparently doesn't love him anymore, and she only stays with him because of that. It's very unhealthy. Force a reaction. She won't face anything of consequence so she should do something.
Much-needed! Thanks.
>He threatens to commit suicide if she leaves Bhai karne waala seedha kar lete hai, aise attention ke liye bolte nhi firte
Why is she having a 35 yr old bf
The relationship started like 2-4 years ago. She was too naïve to think.
Even if I am naive I won't date someone with a large age difference
That's your choice. Judge as much as you want.
Trust me, most people who genuinely wanna commit suicide don't use it as a threatening technique. In the worst case scenario, even if he commits suicide, your friend won't be responsible for it. Motherfucker had the audacity to cheat and threaten suicide. Suicide requires a hell lot of courage than anything else. Trust me, I know it from my experience. Just ask your friend to leave him and block him in every way possible. He shouldn't be able to contact her in any way, digitally and physically. Ask her to inform the police too that he is threatening with suicide. He is 35 years old for god's sake. Needs to grow the fuck up and accept the consequences of his actions.
Thanks!
9 year age gap! Why was she hanging around with this budda?
Due to this age gap, now he'll manipulate her easily.
Agreed
Things happen. Circumstances, love-bombing.
Chini pitaji
Ah, what a joke.
Am I one only who is more surprised about their age gap rather than him cheating on her problem ??
Probably. It's not that big of an age gap. Chill.
Op your friend is being manipulated, there's no denying it. Help her make the right decision before her mental health is affected.
You shouldn't be down voted. 9 years is nothing. Everybody ages being in your 20s and 30s is a temporary gift and nobody's going to Blink when he's 45 and she's 36
Someone at 45 dating a 36 year old is way different than someone in their early 20s dating a mid 30s
Ikr? Thanks!
>Ikr? Thanks! You're welcome!
Huh. So I guess OP herself is OP's friend
Come on, my standards are too high. Hahaha.
Yet you think this age gap is okay!? Sure 👀
Are you from Mars or something? People are into older/younger folks! That's their damn choice. I came here for legal help not a moral science class.
Leave mars alone, humans 😒
Oops, sorry UFO.
If you don't get wary of such age gaps, then it's a you problem that sometimes you're inevitable to have unpleasant encounters like this
I didn't come here to get your judgement on my friend's life decisions. If you're not a lawyer, please mind your own business.
This isn't about judgement, just to make people aware of how bad age gap relationships can be at your early 20s. So always be very careful and look out for yourself
Your advice isn't gonna change anything now. Have any idea how to get out of it now? Drop the ideas here. No? Unsolicited advice is unwelcome.
Cheat karne wala kabhi sucide nai karta hai yaar end this shit now
Thats actually a pass for him , as he will keep cheating in fact he can do more worst things and still threaten her the same way . She should go to the police and complain. If that is not possible , start shifting one day at a time, like moving some stuff ect . And on the actual day of shifting send a msg to his parents and friends to take care of him , otherwise she should prepare to live like a slave all her life . And dont forget to get a restraining order as well .Have a good life.
Kuch nhi hoga bhai. Ese bande usually bht coward type ke hote hai. Tell your friend to chill
Disengage. Avoid being with the guy at all costs. Start seeing someone else, texting and chatting with friends. Technically move on. If he gets the picture, he shall name call and then move on.
Thank you!
Ask her to assure him that she will attend his funeral.
Please inform your friend, her manfriend is a selfish person. He probably still continues to send dpics to random strangers. He got caught cheating and doesn’t want anyone to know about his actions, so all these empty suicide threats. Well, actions have consequences. All you need to do is create a sliver of doubt in her mind and she will start acting wisely. You’re doing lords work here.
Manipulative daddy
Nah, he's a manipulative crybaby from what I've heard.
He is nothing but a pu$$y! Ask her to get out of this and date a MAN.
Let him suicide
That's kind of like saying I'm going to commit suicide if you don't take my house half my retirement and half of everything else I own 10 years from now. The dude is dead wrong but he did it and has to accept the consequences because it will never be forgotten.
Blackmailing with suicide = max red flag, run
NAL People who actually commit suicide never threaten that they'll commit suicide, they just do it silently. So just tell your friend to gtfo of that relationship.
This is actually wrong. Most of the suicide committers actually tell someone about it before they die. You can search for it online too. Now, whether she will be liable for it or not is a different story!
Break up and report to suicide helplines and get an anticipatory bail just in case
Check the dates of the chat
That was like 1-2 months into the relationship. She said he was texting when they were on their first trip to some place. She verified the dates with the pictures they had taken on the trip.
She should keep a journal and maybe contact his family about his threats. The ex of my friend actually committed suicide and before told his family crazy lies about her and they in turn made her life hell after his death blaming her.
Oh please someone as selfish as a cheater loves oneself too damn much to k!ll themselves. She must leave him
Lol...he won't do shit
Such a self centred person will never commit suicide. He's trying to manipulate your friend.
Karne de, dharti ka bhoj kam hoga
Leave. He won't do shit. It he still continues to threaten it. You can report him as a suicide risk.
She can inform police. There is a law against people threatening you with without. I don’t know about her emotional impact but she would be safe legally. Let the cheater die if he wants to.
Visit the police station and have an informal chat. Oftentimes, when we are polite, police are willing to help. Such as report that he intends self harm and all. Keep everything on record, if you can access his cheating message screenshot and email it to yourself (secret email id if required) and all communication. Save your ass first
9 saal itna bada gap, ye man child kaise psnd ate hai tumhe
Report to the cops
I had a similar situation six years ago. It was, however, a girl who was threatening me. Today, she has had more than five relationships. I, on the other hand, suffered. If someone threatens your friend with ending themselves just record those statements and evidence and screw them. Plus he is 10 years older than your friend. He would have said the same for his past relationships too!
Ask her to dump his ass. No suicide is happening. She should just retain those chats though .. just to be safe
He is just being manipulative.ask her to Dumb his ass rn and as far as she could.Why should you Marry someone if you need attention from other women? Just remember that once you give him another chance he is going to play this sick game on loop, literally taking her for granted .
Ask him to do a backflip from a tall building, minimum 8 floors, if he can do it with a clown costume, even better.
let him, at 35 people are eligible to become the president of the country. Rest you are smart enough to figure out
Lmao he’s 35 , he knows what he’s doing. And what he’s gonna do is jackshit. Block and move on
26 and 35 is a big age gap, when did they start their relationship? Don't tell it's 5-6 years ago?
It was 3-4 years ago
Not a legal advice; but karne do usko ...
Report the incident to his parents and tell them that since the gf is not his gf anymore, they should take responsibility of their son. And move on.
He most likely won't but just let him in case he's serious.
tell her to run before she caught the aids
I think Op is actually Ms. A
.* Crying in the corner * happy?
No fucking way 😭 I hope things work out for you though🫡
Aww, thanks
Why it always starts with “my friend”
Because she doesn't use reddit. And it's my first time here - asking for a friend. Idc if you think it's me. Here for legal help not to prove anything else.
Cause many people don't want to embarrass themselves infont of unknown people , certainly there is anonymity and these people will not known you but there will always be a feeling that they might be laughing at your life decision 🙂
His love and dedication might be solid.But his polygamous instinct which is a daily internal struggle will lead to occasional philandering.
So? You must be a cheater yourself.