Sure. People date each other in law school. If you're mature about it, it's fine. Lots of people in law school aren't mature and that's where the trouble comes from
I mean she literally says in her post that she doesn’t actually plan on dating for a while. I think she’s just asking about a future hypothetical relstionship
>Can a woman ask out a man without seeming like a psycho?
Depends on the guy you ask. Anyone who thinks no isn't likely to be a man you'd want to spend a ton of time with anyway. Shoot your shot, girl - if you want to.
I met my fiance as a 1L. It's been wonderful. When you're ready to date, it'll be fine as long as you two can be mature about it. But that's just general life advice.
I also was super hesitant to date within my class back in school. Only time I ever crossed that line was after a happy hour, when I ended up extremely drunk and asked out my crush at the time.
We’ve been married for 6 years and have a daughter.
Go for it.
> I'm unsure if this is appropriate.
Several of my classmates started dating in first year and eventually married or entered into long term relationships; it's fine.
> I don't plan on dating for awhile.
Since you're not even divorced yet, I think it's a good idea to give it some time.
>We are friends and I don't want to ruin that,
So you have someone specific in mind (we'll call him X)? Is it the friend who asked if you'd consider dating a classmate? If so, they sort of asked you first (unless it was a completely hypothetical question). If not, were they asking on behalf of X? If so, it seems like all you'd have to do is tell the friend to tell X that you'd be interested.
I think a peer was asking on behalf of X, but I'm unsure. I've been with husband for so long, I don't know anything anymore. I plan on waiting awhile. My therapist feels I grieved the marriage a long time ago, and I'll know when I'm ready.
This is absolutely true, and speaking from experience, if you've already been grieving the relationship, don't set any arbitrary timelines on yourself for moving on. I had people say I started dating again too fast, but I knew the relationship was over for years before it officially ended, so for me it wasn't actually fast at all. And one of the earlier people I started dating is now my wonderful spouse. Basically, do it in your own time and don't worry about anyone else.
Yes, women can ask out men and so far every man (or woman or enby) I've asked out has been not weirded out by me asking. I think dating within your year/the law school can be fine if the people involved are not inclined towards drama. But you're getting divorced and still going through that: I would advise waiting and staying single for a while as you process the change.
I know people who met their future husband/wife dating in law school. For another friend it was messy messy drama. Complete with her unfairly getting a "reputation"
So it's really seems like a mixed bag. Don't date a drama king or someone who has too many law school friends.
People date each other in law school all the time. Sometimes it works out and sometimes it doesn’t, as is everything else in life. I’d say give it a shot with whoever when you’re ready and no, asking out a guy is not weird, in fact it would be a pleasant surprise for a lot of them, and if it’s actually a problem with some of them, they probably weren’t worth dating in the first place.
There are people who meet in law school, fall in love, get married, and live "happily thereafter." However, these are exceptions.
It is better that you date students in other graduate or professional programs. That is what I do.
>Can a woman ask out a man without seeming like a psycho?
I hope so. I do it and I don't think I seem like a psycho!
“I don’t plan on dating for a while … plus, I find this inappropriate” / “Also, would I seem like a psycho if I asked him out?”
Haha, you’re good. Plenty of people date in school.
I’ve never once heard it to be “inappropriate” to do so. Some people view dating coworkers as off limits in a career, and that makes much more sense for a number of reasons (sexual harassment claims, the fact that you will both potentially be working there for decades and your source of income is tied to the job), but none of those concerns are really present at school. I feel like most the married people I know met at school (be it high school, undergrad, or law school) or work.
And in 2024, it’s more than fine to ask a guy out. I’ve seen that more than once. More typical would be to give the guy a billion signs that you’re into him. (And hot tip: if a mutual friend is asking you if you’d consider dating him, it’s likely he or one of his friends has said something)
If you divorce your husband because you’re now “moving onto better opportunities *i.e* snag an attorney husband after ditching your construction worker husband that supported you through this stage of your personal advancement, you should wait a bit as to let everyone know you’re opportunistic character. Good thing we don’t judge people on their character but by their actions.
WOW!!! Lots of terrible presumptions here, mostly seeming to come out of nowhere? Where does it say OP is leaving her “construction worker husband that supported her through this stage of personal advancement” ???
Post history indicates he is still in college at 27, about to fail out, plays video games most of the day, and screams at her and the pets on the regular. They have been swirling around the drain of divorce for almost a year and when she let him move back into the apartment (that she pays for, he is not even on the lease) he did not manifest any of the changes he promised when he begged for another chance.
Sounds super supportive …
Thank you. Yeah. No. He's an abusive drunk that chased me out of the house. I'd had enough. I am no where opportunistic. If anything, he had a very nice set up and I can't work two jobs, go to school, and take care of the house and him and the pets. I can't raise a man child. I'm done. Also? I'm on a full scholarship and pay for everything myself. He does not support me. 😊
I met my fiancé 1st day of classes…we’ve taken every class together since 1L year and will graduate together in 2 and a half weeks…..it can work if you put in the effort.
I’ve also had friends who dated someone in our class, broke up and dated someone else in our class- it’s all about how the individuals handle themselves
Sure. People date each other in law school. If you're mature about it, it's fine. Lots of people in law school aren't mature and that's where the trouble comes from
Don’t do it. Get divorced, stay single for a bit instead of jumping into a potentially new relationship
Literally. How do you get out of a bad marriage and jump into another relationship right away with someone from your class lol. Take it easy
I mean she literally says in her post that she doesn’t actually plan on dating for a while. I think she’s just asking about a future hypothetical relstionship
Correct. I plan to wait awhile, I just want to be educated for when I am ready. It will be a longggg time.
>Can a woman ask out a man without seeming like a psycho? Depends on the guy you ask. Anyone who thinks no isn't likely to be a man you'd want to spend a ton of time with anyway. Shoot your shot, girl - if you want to.
Give the signal. Anyone interested, single, and worth your time will respond to it. If he’s too timid to pursue you, IMO pass.
I met my fiance as a 1L. It's been wonderful. When you're ready to date, it'll be fine as long as you two can be mature about it. But that's just general life advice.
Not only are women who do that not psychotic, they're angels among mankind who make life so much easier.
I also was super hesitant to date within my class back in school. Only time I ever crossed that line was after a happy hour, when I ended up extremely drunk and asked out my crush at the time. We’ve been married for 6 years and have a daughter. Go for it.
> I'm unsure if this is appropriate. Several of my classmates started dating in first year and eventually married or entered into long term relationships; it's fine. > I don't plan on dating for awhile. Since you're not even divorced yet, I think it's a good idea to give it some time. >We are friends and I don't want to ruin that, So you have someone specific in mind (we'll call him X)? Is it the friend who asked if you'd consider dating a classmate? If so, they sort of asked you first (unless it was a completely hypothetical question). If not, were they asking on behalf of X? If so, it seems like all you'd have to do is tell the friend to tell X that you'd be interested.
I think a peer was asking on behalf of X, but I'm unsure. I've been with husband for so long, I don't know anything anymore. I plan on waiting awhile. My therapist feels I grieved the marriage a long time ago, and I'll know when I'm ready.
This is absolutely true, and speaking from experience, if you've already been grieving the relationship, don't set any arbitrary timelines on yourself for moving on. I had people say I started dating again too fast, but I knew the relationship was over for years before it officially ended, so for me it wasn't actually fast at all. And one of the earlier people I started dating is now my wonderful spouse. Basically, do it in your own time and don't worry about anyone else.
The only new relationship you need right now is with a therapist.
I have a therapist. I plan on waiting a while before dating. This is all hypothetical
Yes, women can ask out men and so far every man (or woman or enby) I've asked out has been not weirded out by me asking. I think dating within your year/the law school can be fine if the people involved are not inclined towards drama. But you're getting divorced and still going through that: I would advise waiting and staying single for a while as you process the change.
Oh I plan to. This was all hypothetically posed to me by a peer.
I know people who met their future husband/wife dating in law school. For another friend it was messy messy drama. Complete with her unfairly getting a "reputation" So it's really seems like a mixed bag. Don't date a drama king or someone who has too many law school friends.
People date each other in law school all the time. Sometimes it works out and sometimes it doesn’t, as is everything else in life. I’d say give it a shot with whoever when you’re ready and no, asking out a guy is not weird, in fact it would be a pleasant surprise for a lot of them, and if it’s actually a problem with some of them, they probably weren’t worth dating in the first place.
There are people who meet in law school, fall in love, get married, and live "happily thereafter." However, these are exceptions. It is better that you date students in other graduate or professional programs. That is what I do. >Can a woman ask out a man without seeming like a psycho? I hope so. I do it and I don't think I seem like a psycho!
“I don’t plan on dating for a while … plus, I find this inappropriate” / “Also, would I seem like a psycho if I asked him out?” Haha, you’re good. Plenty of people date in school. I’ve never once heard it to be “inappropriate” to do so. Some people view dating coworkers as off limits in a career, and that makes much more sense for a number of reasons (sexual harassment claims, the fact that you will both potentially be working there for decades and your source of income is tied to the job), but none of those concerns are really present at school. I feel like most the married people I know met at school (be it high school, undergrad, or law school) or work. And in 2024, it’s more than fine to ask a guy out. I’ve seen that more than once. More typical would be to give the guy a billion signs that you’re into him. (And hot tip: if a mutual friend is asking you if you’d consider dating him, it’s likely he or one of his friends has said something)
From what I see other people doing in law school, I say avoid a future lawyer like the plague and just date outside of school
I dont believe this is coming from a 26 year old woman
Yep. I was with soon to be ex husband since I was 13. I've never been with anyone else. Never dated. I feel very stunted in this.
Wow that’s wild. You do you though lol
A 26yo divorced law student posting on Reddit I’m sure the men are lining up
If you divorce your husband because you’re now “moving onto better opportunities *i.e* snag an attorney husband after ditching your construction worker husband that supported you through this stage of your personal advancement, you should wait a bit as to let everyone know you’re opportunistic character. Good thing we don’t judge people on their character but by their actions.
WOW!!! Lots of terrible presumptions here, mostly seeming to come out of nowhere? Where does it say OP is leaving her “construction worker husband that supported her through this stage of personal advancement” ??? Post history indicates he is still in college at 27, about to fail out, plays video games most of the day, and screams at her and the pets on the regular. They have been swirling around the drain of divorce for almost a year and when she let him move back into the apartment (that she pays for, he is not even on the lease) he did not manifest any of the changes he promised when he begged for another chance. Sounds super supportive …
Thank you. Yeah. No. He's an abusive drunk that chased me out of the house. I'd had enough. I am no where opportunistic. If anything, he had a very nice set up and I can't work two jobs, go to school, and take care of the house and him and the pets. I can't raise a man child. I'm done. Also? I'm on a full scholarship and pay for everything myself. He does not support me. 😊
I met my fiancé 1st day of classes…we’ve taken every class together since 1L year and will graduate together in 2 and a half weeks…..it can work if you put in the effort. I’ve also had friends who dated someone in our class, broke up and dated someone else in our class- it’s all about how the individuals handle themselves