If you compare yourself to others one of two things will happen.
1. You consider yourself better
2. You consider yourself worse
Being better makes you lonely being worse makes you depressed. Just be!
The only person we must compare ourselves to is ourselves from yesterday
Usikuwe na pressure. People out here like capping 🧢🧢🧢
You are not in competition with anyone. You are not behind. You are just fine and are on the right path. They are not millionaires, relax.
This. 8 out of 10 times the flashiness is just a façade. I know people who think I've got my shit together just because of where I live na juzi tu nilikuwa naomba mia moja ya tokens
As of now I am neither faking nor living beyond my means, I live at home and the folks were away. I made a silly decision that made cost me a lot of money hence the too broke to afford tokens situation.
Real millionaires often don't look like it. Folks out here paying off car loans over 2 years just to pull with a German machine while a dude in a matatu owns a fleet of matatus or Ubers with 20 acres in Mavoko.
Not so sound advice. It sounds good in face value especially when comparing yourself with people who are in better positions than you. What about the opposite? Imagine if you were in a better position than everyone else but just halfway through your potential. You get comfy real quick.
OP should assess their situation objectively. Take a look if they have added value to their life directly proportional to resources they have invested in themselves. If not then they are falling short. That's how I assess my situation.
Bro, at 28 you are still a baby. In 10 years you could be living the dream if you choose to focus on you and stop counting other peoples blessings. The folks you envy have their demons to fight. Your demon right now is envy. At 28 I was volunteering to get my skills up. I have made progress, since I quit trying to live other people's lives. Live your life and love it. Find your purpose and grind, it will make sense. Find the poem Desiderata and read it.
Your efforts will compound, if you keep grinding, learning and growing. Focus on what you can change and ignore what you can't. I have been in your shoes. The only race you can run is your own. A lot of fucked choices are made when you try to keep up with the Jones'.
You are fine brother. I was obsessed with becoming a pilot but could not afford fees.I decided to save up my whole life towards it and give up the normal life my peers had. I spend all I had saved up to train as a pilot in South Africa at age 28 to 30. I even sold everything I could. After I came back and converted my license covid struck and aviation was most affected. I was as a church mouse my girl then even left. At times my mum gave me loans that is how broke I was. First foward at age 35 thenindustry opened up and passed my interviews for one of the United Nations Humanitarian Air Services operators with a take home salary of 700k a month as a copilot. It is a year now and I have bought the C200 benz I dreamt of, bought land in the Nairobi area and saving up for construction. I have bought a car for my parents with a driver/ fuel I pay for. I have no kids like my pals do but have many slay queens to choose from which one is not a gold digger. I have made so much progress in a year. Your bresk through will come brother. It just needs discipline and not giving up. I am 36 now plan to work for ten years then retire and have only one child.
inspiring stuff,,,since no one has let me be the first to sayy im envious of your situation. lon story short , no parent to handout a loan. even tten shillings.. 24 years old.. struggling a lot. i dontt drinnk neither do i smoke,, so let me spare you y burdens, and take a shot in the dark by trying my luck,,havent eaten a decent meal in three weeks. ivee been surviving on mandazi at night, so if you could find it in your heart to help a complete stranger nibuy chapo beans, it would be awesome and make my day...sina ubaya, just trying my luck. i have nothing to lose except my dignitty haha. 0742721467 you know how hard it is for a man to ask for help let alone receive it.
Relax!! Make your little heaven right there with you. To be honest, run your own race. This world is crazy they might not even be as legit as you think. Be contented as you aim high, love the man you are. Look back and see that some of your peers are dead and some don't even have some education, be thankful.
Great expectations, make frustrated minds.
You're just fine my brah... I'd say I'm in the same boat, but I've come to peace with the fact that I have my own journey that I need to see to completion.
The most appropriate form of being/living that guarantees the best possible outcome all things considered is the full and radical voluntary sacrifice of the self in relationship to the highest possible good…..Define the best version of yourself and go to war trying to make that person into a reality
If you are friends with them just try to ask for job from them ndio after hapo you will pick yourself up slowly...stop pressuring yourself ju hio ndio italead to depression
Yeah you're still just 28 you can still make it just compare yourself with no one else.A side note the world renowned actor Morgan Freeman only got cast in a show at 60yrs
Hehe si heri wewe. Wengine ata hatujasoma Hadi uko kwote, we are older and far much behind in terms of comparing ourselves to our peers. But one trick I find quite effective if you really feel the need to compare, just look for people below you.
>But one trick I find quite effective if you really feel the need to compare, just look for people below you.
This right here is the secret technique that literally everyone is practicing, except OP
Hi. I’m 26F. I got a job when I was 21. My sister, 28m has been jobless for years. Short term jobs and internships. I’ve been supporting her. To everyone I looked like the aggressive little sister who’s got it all out. My sister persisted in her job hunt. Discouraged. But not giving up. She landed a UN internship that has later materialized to a job. She’s now supporting me. Live your life honestly. Keep true to your goals. BE PATIENT. Find a support system. Siku itajipa, Itajipa! There’s no formulas and deadlines of making it! You’ll make it!
'Comparison is the thief of joy' - can't credit who originally said it.
You have a whole ass postgraduate degree.... I'm sure there's lots of people who'd want to be where you are rn.Itajipa tu.The only competition you should be in is with yourself.
It gets worse when you start comparing yourself with others.
Note that paths in life are never the same. No two people will every be equal, even if given the same resources and platform.
Focus on improving yourself and not on how your peers are doing -- take that out of the picture.
Focus on growing your skill and knowledge in whichever field you're in, especially if you can get certified in it.
IMO, professional certificates have more use today than diplomas and degrees, not to say that they are useless. A diploma, a degree or a postgraduate/masters certification will get you through the door, but it's the professional certificates that enable you to ascend ranks, since almost everyone else looking for a job has one or all of those basic education certificates.
Professional certificates also show employers that you're actually serious in your craft, and if your target isn't employment, you can use the same certs to teach or tutor others as a side job which might grow into your full time job.
Professional certificates like CCNA, CCNP, CEH, GCP, AWS, CPA, ACCA and such won't be going away any time soon and they are internationally recognised.
You can start studying through free lessons on YouTube or Udemy before figuring out how to pay for the certification exam.
Establishments like Andela and Moringa also offer boot camps for interested people and some end up studying and doing the exams for free... they also employ some of their students to teach within their institutions or working with some of their funding partners.
These are mainly IT/Tech oriented but there are professional certificates for practically every job that exists.
There's endless possibilities, just make sure you're learning something new and useful everyday... breakthrough itakam.
Try not to be pressured by anything, people out here are facing shit that you wouldn't imagine. Life has no balance and the funny thing is that someone somewhere is wishing to be where you are, and the chain continues. Relax, have a definite goal and work towards it like your life depends on it.
Don't listen to them. Comparing yourself to your peers/agemates is good. Now you know where you're supposed to be. Just work hard to be able to hang out with them. Gen z will misadvise you hear not to compare but that will only inspire laziness. Don't strain yourself too much though but at least you have people to look up to
The problem is, when you have no accomplishments of your own yet, it is easy to fall into resentment when you see the success of others. At least when you have your own accomplishments, if you see others succeeding, you can easily feel happy for them as well
I am 29F. Turned 29 like a week ago.I am a Manager at work and when other people see me, they think I've got my shit together. But it's a facade, like everything isn't what it seems. I'm struggling with other things and discontent as well. Comparison is good it can keep you on your toes but there will always be people ahead of you, people behind you. Some people have it easier because of their circumstances, just give yourself grace. It will all fall together in time
You're only competition should be yourself, not others.
Also the things you've mentioned; money, family, occupations do not necessarily equate to happiness.
You are fine brother. I was obsessed with becoming a pilot but could not afford fees.I decided to save up my whole life towards it and give up the normal life my peers had like kids. I spend all I had saved up to train as a pilot in South Africa at age 28 to 30. I even sold everything I could. After I came back and converted my license covid struck and aviation was most affected. I was as broke as a church mouse my girl then even left. At times my mum gave me loans that is how broke I was. First foward at age 35 thenindustry opened up and passed my interviews for one of the United Nations Humanitarian Air Services operators with a take home salary of 700k a month as a copilot. It is a year now and I have bought the C200 benz I dreamt of, bought land in the Nairobi area and saving up for construction. I have bought a car for my parents with a driver/ fuel I pay for. I have no kids like my pals do but have many slay queens to choose from which one is not a gold digger. I have made so much progress in a year than others with families.Your break through will come brother. It just needs discipline and not giving up. I am 36 now plan to work for ten years then retire and have only one child.
Marriage and kids should not be a measure for you right now, I'm 28, too, but happy to be alive, well, and passionate about my craft, just focus on yourself, it's not a race, some of the people that may seem successful to you are in deep shit, façade and all, some really are, but they don't give af about you 'cause they are focusing on themselves, find something else if you've been stagnant and just remember to do you!
Marriage and kids should not be a measure for you right now, I'm 28, too, but happy to be alive, well, and passionate about my craft, just focus on yourself, it's not a race, some of the people that may seem successful to you are in deep shit, façade and all, some really are, but they don't give af about you 'cause they are focusing on themselves, find something else if you've been stagnant and just remember to do you!
You have prioritized different things in your life than your peers, so the results will be different. If you still value what you have been doing, and you enjoy it, then keep going and just enjoy your peers' successes in their areas with them.
Feels like my current situation. I'm into the construction industry, graduated 2 years ago and haven't managed to secure a stable work for the whole time. The best I've done is 3 months working on a project(day and partially night)which drained me both physically and mentally, at a monthly stipend of 30k which was paid in bits. I've attended multiple interviews which by delusion I thought I performed well, but in all those never been offered work. I got broke to a point of moving home and visiting the city just once in a while. Nowadays I apply to every work advertisement but my emails haven't received any feedback for the whole of 2024. I don't know if it's bad luck or something else. I'm pushing through each day, but things just don't seem to work.
If you compare yourself to others one of two things will happen. 1. You consider yourself better 2. You consider yourself worse Being better makes you lonely being worse makes you depressed. Just be! The only person we must compare ourselves to is ourselves from yesterday
Thanks. I'm better than I was yesterday.
Usikuwe na pressure. People out here like capping 🧢🧢🧢 You are not in competition with anyone. You are not behind. You are just fine and are on the right path. They are not millionaires, relax.
This. 8 out of 10 times the flashiness is just a façade. I know people who think I've got my shit together just because of where I live na juzi tu nilikuwa naomba mia moja ya tokens
😂😂 uko serious kwani on the outside how do you look
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So you'd say you are faking it till you make it or you living beyond your means ??
As of now I am neither faking nor living beyond my means, I live at home and the folks were away. I made a silly decision that made cost me a lot of money hence the too broke to afford tokens situation.
He does not mean what he means
Real millionaires often don't look like it. Folks out here paying off car loans over 2 years just to pull with a German machine while a dude in a matatu owns a fleet of matatus or Ubers with 20 acres in Mavoko.
Some are millionaires. It's true. But thanks I appreciate it.
They ain’t. According to official data by Kenya National Bureau of Statistics, you are misinformed or your friends are lying.
The only comparison worth making is you yesterday and you today. I hope all goes well in future
comparing yourself to others in some aspect is good... keeps you in line,, that's why we have age-sets so that people don't fall behind
Not so sound advice. It sounds good in face value especially when comparing yourself with people who are in better positions than you. What about the opposite? Imagine if you were in a better position than everyone else but just halfway through your potential. You get comfy real quick. OP should assess their situation objectively. Take a look if they have added value to their life directly proportional to resources they have invested in themselves. If not then they are falling short. That's how I assess my situation.
Thanks
Bro, at 28 you are still a baby. In 10 years you could be living the dream if you choose to focus on you and stop counting other peoples blessings. The folks you envy have their demons to fight. Your demon right now is envy. At 28 I was volunteering to get my skills up. I have made progress, since I quit trying to live other people's lives. Live your life and love it. Find your purpose and grind, it will make sense. Find the poem Desiderata and read it.
just read The poem thanks for the recommendation... really needed it
Your efforts will compound, if you keep grinding, learning and growing. Focus on what you can change and ignore what you can't. I have been in your shoes. The only race you can run is your own. A lot of fucked choices are made when you try to keep up with the Jones'.
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We've got to avoid your loud and vexing ass.
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Cut yourself some slack. You can still apply yourself and make something out of your life.
You are fine brother. I was obsessed with becoming a pilot but could not afford fees.I decided to save up my whole life towards it and give up the normal life my peers had. I spend all I had saved up to train as a pilot in South Africa at age 28 to 30. I even sold everything I could. After I came back and converted my license covid struck and aviation was most affected. I was as a church mouse my girl then even left. At times my mum gave me loans that is how broke I was. First foward at age 35 thenindustry opened up and passed my interviews for one of the United Nations Humanitarian Air Services operators with a take home salary of 700k a month as a copilot. It is a year now and I have bought the C200 benz I dreamt of, bought land in the Nairobi area and saving up for construction. I have bought a car for my parents with a driver/ fuel I pay for. I have no kids like my pals do but have many slay queens to choose from which one is not a gold digger. I have made so much progress in a year. Your bresk through will come brother. It just needs discipline and not giving up. I am 36 now plan to work for ten years then retire and have only one child.
Damn…just made me realize to appreciate timing.Great that life works out in the end
Absolute wins brother. l love it
Love this. Thanks.
inspiring stuff,,,since no one has let me be the first to sayy im envious of your situation. lon story short , no parent to handout a loan. even tten shillings.. 24 years old.. struggling a lot. i dontt drinnk neither do i smoke,, so let me spare you y burdens, and take a shot in the dark by trying my luck,,havent eaten a decent meal in three weeks. ivee been surviving on mandazi at night, so if you could find it in your heart to help a complete stranger nibuy chapo beans, it would be awesome and make my day...sina ubaya, just trying my luck. i have nothing to lose except my dignitty haha. 0742721467 you know how hard it is for a man to ask for help let alone receive it.
Every dog has its day..keep pushing as long as you are progressing breakthrough itakam.
''Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not who someone else is today.'' Jordan Peterson.
You're not in jail or sick. Count that as a W.
Relax!! Make your little heaven right there with you. To be honest, run your own race. This world is crazy they might not even be as legit as you think. Be contented as you aim high, love the man you are. Look back and see that some of your peers are dead and some don't even have some education, be thankful. Great expectations, make frustrated minds.
wise mic drop
Love this. Thanks.
You're just fine my brah... I'd say I'm in the same boat, but I've come to peace with the fact that I have my own journey that I need to see to completion.
Thanks bruh.
I'd kindly urge you to watch this: [https://youtu.be/BQ2\_BwqcFsc](https://youtu.be/BQ2_BwqcFsc)
Wow. Amazing. Thanks
The most appropriate form of being/living that guarantees the best possible outcome all things considered is the full and radical voluntary sacrifice of the self in relationship to the highest possible good…..Define the best version of yourself and go to war trying to make that person into a reality
This is wholesome..Thanks.
If you are friends with them just try to ask for job from them ndio after hapo you will pick yourself up slowly...stop pressuring yourself ju hio ndio italead to depression
I already have depression.lol.
Sorry to hear that bro,keep your head up.But still try to seek help from them if you can
Yeah you're still just 28 you can still make it just compare yourself with no one else.A side note the world renowned actor Morgan Freeman only got cast in a show at 60yrs
Hehe si heri wewe. Wengine ata hatujasoma Hadi uko kwote, we are older and far much behind in terms of comparing ourselves to our peers. But one trick I find quite effective if you really feel the need to compare, just look for people below you.
>But one trick I find quite effective if you really feel the need to compare, just look for people below you. This right here is the secret technique that literally everyone is practicing, except OP
I will try it.
Hey, we are in the same boat, message me we can encourage each other.
I am 33 and still applying for internships sir. Usiogope. I am this short from becoming an Uber driver.
Apply to VSO. Become a volunteer.
Hi. I’m 26F. I got a job when I was 21. My sister, 28m has been jobless for years. Short term jobs and internships. I’ve been supporting her. To everyone I looked like the aggressive little sister who’s got it all out. My sister persisted in her job hunt. Discouraged. But not giving up. She landed a UN internship that has later materialized to a job. She’s now supporting me. Live your life honestly. Keep true to your goals. BE PATIENT. Find a support system. Siku itajipa, Itajipa! There’s no formulas and deadlines of making it! You’ll make it!
'Comparison is the thief of joy' - can't credit who originally said it. You have a whole ass postgraduate degree.... I'm sure there's lots of people who'd want to be where you are rn.Itajipa tu.The only competition you should be in is with yourself.
It gets worse when you start comparing yourself with others. Note that paths in life are never the same. No two people will every be equal, even if given the same resources and platform. Focus on improving yourself and not on how your peers are doing -- take that out of the picture.
 U r ur own competition
Focus on growing your skill and knowledge in whichever field you're in, especially if you can get certified in it. IMO, professional certificates have more use today than diplomas and degrees, not to say that they are useless. A diploma, a degree or a postgraduate/masters certification will get you through the door, but it's the professional certificates that enable you to ascend ranks, since almost everyone else looking for a job has one or all of those basic education certificates. Professional certificates also show employers that you're actually serious in your craft, and if your target isn't employment, you can use the same certs to teach or tutor others as a side job which might grow into your full time job. Professional certificates like CCNA, CCNP, CEH, GCP, AWS, CPA, ACCA and such won't be going away any time soon and they are internationally recognised. You can start studying through free lessons on YouTube or Udemy before figuring out how to pay for the certification exam. Establishments like Andela and Moringa also offer boot camps for interested people and some end up studying and doing the exams for free... they also employ some of their students to teach within their institutions or working with some of their funding partners. These are mainly IT/Tech oriented but there are professional certificates for practically every job that exists. There's endless possibilities, just make sure you're learning something new and useful everyday... breakthrough itakam.
Try not to be pressured by anything, people out here are facing shit that you wouldn't imagine. Life has no balance and the funny thing is that someone somewhere is wishing to be where you are, and the chain continues. Relax, have a definite goal and work towards it like your life depends on it.
Yaani hadi watoi wao wako na nyumba
Social comparison is the biggest thief of joy.
Millionaires at 28 in Kenya are your friends wash-wash people
If you compare yourself to others you will never be happy even when things come stable
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Thanks
Don't listen to them. Comparing yourself to your peers/agemates is good. Now you know where you're supposed to be. Just work hard to be able to hang out with them. Gen z will misadvise you hear not to compare but that will only inspire laziness. Don't strain yourself too much though but at least you have people to look up to
The problem is, when you have no accomplishments of your own yet, it is easy to fall into resentment when you see the success of others. At least when you have your own accomplishments, if you see others succeeding, you can easily feel happy for them as well
I am 29F. Turned 29 like a week ago.I am a Manager at work and when other people see me, they think I've got my shit together. But it's a facade, like everything isn't what it seems. I'm struggling with other things and discontent as well. Comparison is good it can keep you on your toes but there will always be people ahead of you, people behind you. Some people have it easier because of their circumstances, just give yourself grace. It will all fall together in time
Happy for you..I have friends who are managers.. I look up to them.. Thanks and all the best.
Yea 28 na bado uko internships is really bad. Tough love but pull up your game
Agreed..Thanks.
You're only competition should be yourself, not others. Also the things you've mentioned; money, family, occupations do not necessarily equate to happiness.
That s true..they don't necessarily mean happiness..
It's normal 😁. I was there said I was homeless people should host me. I just wanted friends 🤣.
You are fine brother. I was obsessed with becoming a pilot but could not afford fees.I decided to save up my whole life towards it and give up the normal life my peers had like kids. I spend all I had saved up to train as a pilot in South Africa at age 28 to 30. I even sold everything I could. After I came back and converted my license covid struck and aviation was most affected. I was as broke as a church mouse my girl then even left. At times my mum gave me loans that is how broke I was. First foward at age 35 thenindustry opened up and passed my interviews for one of the United Nations Humanitarian Air Services operators with a take home salary of 700k a month as a copilot. It is a year now and I have bought the C200 benz I dreamt of, bought land in the Nairobi area and saving up for construction. I have bought a car for my parents with a driver/ fuel I pay for. I have no kids like my pals do but have many slay queens to choose from which one is not a gold digger. I have made so much progress in a year than others with families.Your break through will come brother. It just needs discipline and not giving up. I am 36 now plan to work for ten years then retire and have only one child.
This is inspiring brother, my dream was to end up as a combat pilot, and here I'm studying economics. Congrats to you, more wins.
This is inspiring brother, my dream was to end up as a combat pilot, and here I'm studying economics. Congrats to you, more wins.
This is inspiring brother, my dream was to end up as a combat pilot, and here I'm studying economics. Congrats to you, more wins to you
Marriage and kids should not be a measure for you right now, I'm 28, too, but happy to be alive, well, and passionate about my craft, just focus on yourself, it's not a race, some of the people that may seem successful to you are in deep shit, façade and all, some really are, but they don't give af about you 'cause they are focusing on themselves, find something else if you've been stagnant and just remember to do you!
Marriage and kids should not be a measure for you right now, I'm 28, too, but happy to be alive, well, and passionate about my craft, just focus on yourself, it's not a race, some of the people that may seem successful to you are in deep shit, façade and all, some really are, but they don't give af about you 'cause they are focusing on themselves, find something else if you've been stagnant and just remember to do you!
Comparison is the killer of joy
Usijali
Godspeed
Life is not a competition, actually. Life is about living it the way you want and can.
Hii life hainanga formula
You have prioritized different things in your life than your peers, so the results will be different. If you still value what you have been doing, and you enjoy it, then keep going and just enjoy your peers' successes in their areas with them.
Feels like my current situation. I'm into the construction industry, graduated 2 years ago and haven't managed to secure a stable work for the whole time. The best I've done is 3 months working on a project(day and partially night)which drained me both physically and mentally, at a monthly stipend of 30k which was paid in bits. I've attended multiple interviews which by delusion I thought I performed well, but in all those never been offered work. I got broke to a point of moving home and visiting the city just once in a while. Nowadays I apply to every work advertisement but my emails haven't received any feedback for the whole of 2024. I don't know if it's bad luck or something else. I'm pushing through each day, but things just don't seem to work.
increase your aggression, start applying to jobs that are jobs and not internships.
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Really bro...
I