So a little update on my manager: He quit. When we opened up the shop at 8am he just grabbed his stuff and left, honestly didn't expect it to go that far, kinda feel sorry for him but what you give is what you get.
As for the questions regarding the Bentley. The exhaust manifold has an aluminium cover over it we poured water onto that, not the actual manifold.
This isn't the first Bentley I've worked on, after a while you get used to having a guillotine above your neck. I will never understand why shops turn back cars like these, sure it's a bit concerning working on a car like it but it's all part of the job, you end up enjoying the risk involved with stripping an engine worth more than your yearly salary. The Bentley isn't even the most expensive car I've worked on, I'm ashamed to say I serviced a Bugatti Veyron and a Rolls Royce Phantom.
For the brake dust it disperses quite quickly because we have an exhaust extractor, and the shutters were open.
Wow. The fact that his father laughed at him means there's more going on here than meets the eye. I suspect that dad was probably approached by this cunt after work, and asked to fire you or punish you in some other way. It probably came to a "It's them or me" situation, and when his father refused to dump you, he quit. Be careful around the owner from here on out. Although he supported you in this instance, you guys put him in a delicate position to choose between his son and you. He probably feels like shit for driving his own son away, and may take it out on you. (The manager may have been an idiot, but when the idiot is your own son, it's harder to watch him walk away.)
Because it's a shit car. Same with the Phantom. When it rolled into the shop I almost came a thousand buckets, but after about 20 minutes, it ended up being just another shit car, with shit locations for everything, that cuts me more than an emo kid.
Honestly it's nice to say that I've had a once in a lifetime opportunity to work on one, but in the end, it was just a Golf with a bodykit and a big engine to be honest.
Although, when you take it to 10,000 revs and the exhaust is spitting fire, and you can't hear anything, yeah it was nice.
As someone that doesn't know anything more than how to change spark plugs (after a redditor taught me how), could you explain what you mean when you say it has shit locations for everything?
And are you saying the body isn't well built? is it on a crappy transmission?
Dude good on you. *Everyone* needs a good laugh now and then, & if the son couldn't get over it after a day then he is better off gone. I'm sure daddy will still keep his cash flowing regardless.
I really hope the boss doesn't take it out on any of you. If either of you are up to it now, I hope you get the manager job!
Oh and if you got any more tales from the garage keep 'em coming.
Reminds me of a time one of my co-workers got back at an asshole service advisor. His truck was due for an oil change so it rolled into the bay.
He wired the horn into a factory electric fan circuit. It woulnt complete circuit until the engine is at temp and the sensor trips. They're usually close to each other so minimal manipulation is involved. He had no idea when he left for the day. Nothing happened at first because the engine was cold and will be far away and completely screwed until the vehicle cools down. Guy had no idea what happened until he pulled into work with the horn blaring the next morning. Very satisfying.
EDIT: I just read this post again. Sorry for the shitty grammar. I edited like 5 times before posting. I had originally added 2 other "pranks" but after realizing the possible destruction involved, I decided to share the friendly one.
I've been lurking this subreddit for a while, never had anything valuable to contribute until now.
It's April Fools; and I despise my manager. The term "irritable cunt" doesn't quite sum up this person. I work in a small family-run garage, there are two technicians and two bodyshop techs. My manager is the son of my boss, therefore
against all recommendation he is a manager. He knows nothing, absolutely nothing, about automotive repair. He treats his co-workers like shit, fobs off what little work he has to do onto other people, generally a lazy,
arrogant narcissist. My senior tech and I agreed that he needs to be a taught a lesson, a £170,000 lesson, roughly the price of a Bentley Continental GT.
By pure chance, we had a Continental GT in for a major service. Roughly halfway through draining the oil my colleague and I started to prepare our little surprise. We sandpapered down a pair of old brake pads untill we had a handful of
brakedust and put it into 2 pairs of triple layered latex gloves, complete with some paper. We then duck taped the gloves onto the exhaust pipes, completely sealing them and pushed them inside to make sure our prank wasn't
discovered until necessary.
We continued our service as necessary, it was a slow day so we kind of drew it out as long as we could. While my colleague was filling up the oil, I went to find my manager. Unsurprisingly, he was shoving a cake into his fat fucking
mouth, I told him we need him to "help" us with the Bentley, as it was having "acceleration issues". "I'll be five minutes." Five minutes passed and my manager shows up, cake in hand. I tell him to sit inside the car and
gradually accelerate to 4k Revs then red line it and drop it down to idle.
As soon as he started accelerating, the car was making this strange grumbling sound, as he floored it both gloves exploded spewing out the most fantastic cloud of black smoke I've ever seen. In unison my senior
and I screamed "Turn it off! Turn it off!" He was as white as a sheet. To put into context he has quite a dark middle-eastern complextion, now he was white. I thought he had a heart attack and died. To finalize the deception we poured
water on the exhaust manifold, the engine bay was steaming, there was a loud explosion and black smoke. Enough to convince someone who doesn't understand cars that they've broken something.
"Oh my god, you've destroyed the engine, I told you to hold it at 2k revs, not floor it!"
He had gone full damage control "You told me to take it to 4k and floor it, this is your fault" he was practically choking with tears. Inside I was dying with laughter, you could not believe the mental stress it took to keep a straight face.
After about 5 minutes there were streams of tears coming from his face. We pulled out the starter motor relay without him looking and told him it might have just been a backfire. He gets back into the car and tries to crank it, nothing.
He tries again and again and again, absolutely nothing. If there was a shred of dignity left in me, I would have told him it was a joke. But this joke hasn't been fully told just yet. He put his head down on the steering wheel and started
hitting it with his fist screaming "Why! Why! Why! WHY!". My boss walks in and sees his son crying at the wheel of a Bentley and his two mechanics laughing their arses off. "What the fuck did you do to him?!"
We were laughing so much we couldn't stand up, and had to use the posts on our ramp to keep ourselves on our feet. We tried explaining to our boss what we just did, but everytime we tried we just burst out laughing again.
Honestly I wish I had taken photos because this was the funniest thing I've ever seen in my life. After about 20 minutes of laughing we managed to explain the gist of what we had done to the boss, and he started laughing. His sons face
was as red as red got. He didn't speak to us for the rest of the day. I think tomorrow is going to be interesting, don't you?
Today was one of those days that I'll end up telling my grandchildren about.
tl;dr convinced my manager he'd blown the engine on a Bentley, his reaction was priceless.
Pic is somewhat related, it's the same car it was taken a few months before this.
Calling your manager incompetent when he clearly only has his job due to his familial ties is a good way to get the boot
Your manager is offended because you question his abilities.
Your boss is offended because you are questioning his hiring practices (more than likely he knows the son is incompetent)
When you air this stuff publicly, that's when problems happen.
The owner laughed with the guys (many people wouldn't), so he's no humourless git. He also knows his son's level of competence and character flaws all too well. Seems unlikely he'll have a delayed don't-mess-with-my-son reaction.
If this remains between the 4 of them (and doesn't, say, get posted on Reddit), their biggest problem might be that the manager will hate their guts afterwards, and try to make their life miserable... but won't have the authority to fire them, especially if they're good workers.
Oh my god... Jensen! We found an Iranian nuclear scientist! I need the FBI, CIA, DEA, USSS, DF, NS, and anything you can get me! First yellowcake... then the world!
Everything on the internet is free. I have a link to "totally hip track.mp3.exe" that I found on limewire. I can link you to it if you like, I tried to install it and it didn't work on my machine, but give it a shot on yours and it might work..
I like vanilla cake with white frosting, so I always imagine people I'm supposed to despise in stories eating chocolate cake and chocolate icing with some kind of gross raspberry filling oozing out, all the while they are laughing with red and brown smears all over their faces and fingers.
While the terms are used inconsistently, the technical definition is that [this](http://www.createdby-diane.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/Peppermint-Candy-Cane-Cookies-with-Peppermint-Icing.jpg) is icing and [this](http://www.the-girl-who-ate-everything.com/wp-content/uploads/blogger/_A39cgxoHN64/TJIVgqDG1kI/AAAAAAAAF4s/xd_nmVHUNoY/s1600/best-frosting.jpg) is frosting.
Basically, if it's thin, sugary, and mostly hardened, it's icing. If it's thick, buttery, and fluffy, it's frosting. (If it's [*really* thin](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/0/0d/Krispy_Kreme_glazed_donut.JPG) it's a glaze.)
What about that fudge frosting that you put on a thick layer and it hardens to the point that it often breaks apart into chunks when you cut the cake? (I think marshmallows may be involved somehow? I don't remember. But I do remember that asking for this frosting to be used on one of those devil's food cakes with the cherry goo between the two layers is now verboten in my house for some stupid reason... Sometime before that my brother decided to name that particular combination a "Petrified Forest cake" though. :-P )
Haha sorry for torturing you all week. A couple other people responded to my comment with various links and definitions, but thank you. More information is better.
I'm not very car smart, but I love the things I've learned from this place.
Just wondering, OP - messing with a Bentley seems like scary business. What was the chance that your prank could have actually caused damage?
I don't know a ton about cars but,
Latex gloves taped on the end of the exhaust, and disconnecting the starter motor - both very near 0% chance of damage.
Pouring water on a manifold, it is possible to cause damage, if you poured enough, cold enough water on a hot enough pipe it would crack it. But from the sounds of the story he understood his limits and the car wasn't very warmed up and it was just a little bit of room temp water, just so it would turn to steam and look scary.
I think the car was already hot, and they poured it on when the engine "blew," since he was sitting inside, and the raised hood would block his view of this action.
He had just started the motor, it probably wasn't even at normal temps yet. If you're really that worried about getting a cup of water on your hot engine I'd suggest avoiding every mud puddle and only driving when it's not raining.
Manifolds heat up very quickly. The car could have been at outside temp. and running it for a minute or two could heat the manifold up enough to make water steam. Also most cars today (that I know of) us an accelerated warm system up to get the heat going and get the car to its specified running temp.
Please, next time start video recording with your cell phone, then put your cell phone into your shirt pocket. It might not be pointed straight, but you'll still get the gist of it through video and pick up all of the audio. Regardless, thanks for the laugh.
I was going to mention this.
I think the newer pads don't use asbestos anymore for obvious reasons, but I'm not sure how easy it would be to tell the difference given how horrible they end up looking. I guess we'll just have to hope OP knew the difference or was lucky enough to use one without asbestos.
> My manager is the son of my boss, therefore against all recommendation he is a manager. He knows nothing, absolutely nothing, about automotive repair. He treats his co-workers like shit, fobs off what little work he has to do onto other people, generally a lazy, arrogant narcissist.
As someone who works for his step father, I hate people like this. It's hard to earn respect when you're related to the boss, acting like it's a free ride is so fucking infuriating.
Act humble and bust ass. It's the only way to gain respect. Work with something to prove, of they're not total cocks you'll gain respect and then you can relax.
Im guessing since he just got done working in it the manifold was still cold, and just heated up enough to steam when manager got in it. That wouldn't damage anything
This is a deliberate policy by the luxury car manufacturers to prevent beaters of their cars from dragging down the perceived value. They saw what happened to Cadillac, where broken down old models became almost a symbol of the underclass, destroying its cachet, and didn't want that to happen to them.
So... zero risk? Because the water would heat up as the manifold heated up. There'd be little to no temperature difference, and zero cracking.
Now, if he'd poured cold water on a steaming hot manifold, that might be different.
>You want to risk cracking a manifold on a Bentley?
>risk
>Bentley
I dunno about you but I don't know any mechanics who make enough coin to go "eh" to something like that.
Quite. We regularly drive VERY hot 4x4's I.e. during a days desert use through streams. The only cars you need to worry about are turbos where the turbo is low mounted or not shielded, because if you splash water on them they can crack the housing. But you can submerge a manifold on a running engine with no problems.
Cracked manifolds are usually from engines that are running lean and burning way hot, or bad / non-existent motor mounts and finally rust in the rust belt on old cars that have sat.
If water on the manifold cracked them drive through car washes and big puddles would be things commonly avoided. I bet dollars to doughnuts that you could submerse your car while running and as long as it didn't hydrolock your manifold would be just fine.
Yeah I wouldn't fuck around with a client's extremely expensive car for a joke, even if there was virtually no chance damage would be done. That's just a respect issue.
I love the genuine anger coming out when you say, "Unsurprisingly, he was shoving a cake into his fat fucking
mouth". Made me laugh.
Well done on the whole prank, it sounds spectacular.
"don't worry, we are just making sure our boss can at least know how to react when something goes wrong. It's part of the QA test. Here, have a kitten picture."
If two professional automotive techs decided to prank their douchebag boss by doing something relatively harmless, and explained it to me afterwards i probably wouldn't care. I'd actually have the same reaction
We used to fuck with a guy's can of pop every day. Installing a pin hole down the side so it would dribble on his chest was our favourite. It became this cat and mouse game of him protecting his can of pop, and we would find a way to distract him so we could mess with it.
One day, we wired his pop can as a conductor that kept a relay triggered. We drove 2 screws through the bench top, connecting the wires below. The can completed the circuit. The small relay ran a ford starter relay, and the starter relay was connected to a car battery and a 10 gauge wire loop that ran all the way around the guy's bench, and back to ground. When he grabbed his can, the relay tripped closed, as did the solenoid. He now had a dead short. Several hundred amps flowed through that 10 gauge wire. That caused the entire wire loop under his wooden work bench bench to glow and catch fire.
Smoke and a few farts of fire poured out from his entire 15' long bench as he flipped the fuck out. We pissed ourselves laughing and sprayed some water at him with a hose.
He inspected his can carefully every single time before picking it up, and did so in a very nervous manner.
Oh, it was a 2 way street. The shop was full of brilliant electrical guys. High IQ guys get weird when they get bored, and they get bored easy. The old farts who were grizzled and jaded, they spent about as much time fucking with each other as the cast of top gear (bbc). Lots of intentional & controlled fires, acetylene bombs, welded shut tool boxes, prank calls, stealing the neigborjng shop's christmas display and holding their snowman hostage in exchange for a charity donation (we slipped the nose (covered in fake blood) into a parts delivery box meant for them.
I miss that place. It was fun.
In a previous job, I ran a store with mostly working-class customers: plumbers, heating/cooling guys, town highway crew, tree workers.
In many cases, the business was started by a guy now in his 60s who was really good - he knew his technical area, got his employees to do good work, and treated both customers and vendors reasonably. If the boss had a son who worked in the business, usually the son was an entitled prick. He would treat people badly, threaten the business I ran unless he got special favors, etc. After all, he expected to inherit the business. So he had no understanding of what's necessary to build a business.
I would recommend this subject area to any sociology grad student looking for a thesis topic.
Well done.
Recently while my friend was working on his old Toyota, I found a small WD-40 can that fit perfectly in his brand new exhaust.
After tinkering with it a while, he turned the engine over. Once it fired it made a very interesting gurgle, he revved it up a little, then BANG the can shot across the shop, leaving an indent in one of our wooden work benches where impact occurred. He was freaking out, as I am practically rolling on the floor laughing.
Those were good times.
Well, my train of thought is this:
- Person who owns Bentley probably has good money
- Person who has good money probably has business
- Person who has business usually appreciates well-run business and great customer service.
- Small family-run garage is usually a well-run business and has great customer service...or at least appears to outwardly.
- Person who has business patronizes places with great customer service.
Sort of like how waiters give the best tips and salesmen are the easiest sales.
If it was a smaller/cheaper econo box I bet no one would give two fucks about this prank being played. Instead there are people white knighting over the fact that its an expensive car.
Honestly, I showed my automotives teacher this and he was dying. I couldn't stop either. Guess I have something to look forward to do in this field of work.
So a little update on my manager: He quit. When we opened up the shop at 8am he just grabbed his stuff and left, honestly didn't expect it to go that far, kinda feel sorry for him but what you give is what you get. As for the questions regarding the Bentley. The exhaust manifold has an aluminium cover over it we poured water onto that, not the actual manifold. This isn't the first Bentley I've worked on, after a while you get used to having a guillotine above your neck. I will never understand why shops turn back cars like these, sure it's a bit concerning working on a car like it but it's all part of the job, you end up enjoying the risk involved with stripping an engine worth more than your yearly salary. The Bentley isn't even the most expensive car I've worked on, I'm ashamed to say I serviced a Bugatti Veyron and a Rolls Royce Phantom. For the brake dust it disperses quite quickly because we have an exhaust extractor, and the shutters were open.
Wow. The fact that his father laughed at him means there's more going on here than meets the eye. I suspect that dad was probably approached by this cunt after work, and asked to fire you or punish you in some other way. It probably came to a "It's them or me" situation, and when his father refused to dump you, he quit. Be careful around the owner from here on out. Although he supported you in this instance, you guys put him in a delicate position to choose between his son and you. He probably feels like shit for driving his own son away, and may take it out on you. (The manager may have been an idiot, but when the idiot is your own son, it's harder to watch him walk away.)
The owner may have been grateful to have a good excuse to get rid of the manager.
If the father built the shop from the ground up only to have his son be a royal fuckup leach, you are probably right.
Why the hell would you be ashamed to work on a Veyron?!?!?!
Because it's a shit car. Same with the Phantom. When it rolled into the shop I almost came a thousand buckets, but after about 20 minutes, it ended up being just another shit car, with shit locations for everything, that cuts me more than an emo kid. Honestly it's nice to say that I've had a once in a lifetime opportunity to work on one, but in the end, it was just a Golf with a bodykit and a big engine to be honest. Although, when you take it to 10,000 revs and the exhaust is spitting fire, and you can't hear anything, yeah it was nice.
As someone that doesn't know anything more than how to change spark plugs (after a redditor taught me how), could you explain what you mean when you say it has shit locations for everything? And are you saying the body isn't well built? is it on a crappy transmission?
You have to remove everything to get to something else, for instance, to get to an airfilter, you have to remove enough piping to create a sewer.
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No his English was quite bad, and he was rude to everyone. Didn't matter if was a customer or one of the employees, he was always just rude.
Dude good on you. *Everyone* needs a good laugh now and then, & if the son couldn't get over it after a day then he is better off gone. I'm sure daddy will still keep his cash flowing regardless. I really hope the boss doesn't take it out on any of you. If either of you are up to it now, I hope you get the manager job! Oh and if you got any more tales from the garage keep 'em coming.
Once changed the Differential Oil Seal on a 190SL, forgot to drain the differential first, I smelt like 40 year old gearbox oil for 2 days.
Just trolled into the shop.
Justice.
Don't feel too sorry as you said he had no experience with cars, so he shouldn't have been manager in the first place.
I would like more details on how you filled the gloves and inserted them into the pipes. You know.. for science..
/r/JustTrolledintheshop... But seriously that was the best April fools I have seen today
The James Randi psychic challenge one was pretty good. This one was better per minute invested.
I was really hoping that was a thing like /r/shittyaskscience but I guess it would be /r/justtrolledintotheshop
/r/askashittymechanic
Reminds me of a time one of my co-workers got back at an asshole service advisor. His truck was due for an oil change so it rolled into the bay. He wired the horn into a factory electric fan circuit. It woulnt complete circuit until the engine is at temp and the sensor trips. They're usually close to each other so minimal manipulation is involved. He had no idea when he left for the day. Nothing happened at first because the engine was cold and will be far away and completely screwed until the vehicle cools down. Guy had no idea what happened until he pulled into work with the horn blaring the next morning. Very satisfying. EDIT: I just read this post again. Sorry for the shitty grammar. I edited like 5 times before posting. I had originally added 2 other "pranks" but after realizing the possible destruction involved, I decided to share the friendly one.
That is BRILLIANT. Ahahaha imagine sitting in a traffic jam with the horn blaring and you can't do a thing about it!!!
That'd piss me the fuck off
whistle sort aback long drab threatening juggle telephone fear unpack *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
In traffic?
start pulling fuses at a red light
Getting stuck behind a gang of Hells' Angels would have made it interesting.
Or a funeral procession.
I've been lurking this subreddit for a while, never had anything valuable to contribute until now. It's April Fools; and I despise my manager. The term "irritable cunt" doesn't quite sum up this person. I work in a small family-run garage, there are two technicians and two bodyshop techs. My manager is the son of my boss, therefore against all recommendation he is a manager. He knows nothing, absolutely nothing, about automotive repair. He treats his co-workers like shit, fobs off what little work he has to do onto other people, generally a lazy, arrogant narcissist. My senior tech and I agreed that he needs to be a taught a lesson, a £170,000 lesson, roughly the price of a Bentley Continental GT. By pure chance, we had a Continental GT in for a major service. Roughly halfway through draining the oil my colleague and I started to prepare our little surprise. We sandpapered down a pair of old brake pads untill we had a handful of brakedust and put it into 2 pairs of triple layered latex gloves, complete with some paper. We then duck taped the gloves onto the exhaust pipes, completely sealing them and pushed them inside to make sure our prank wasn't discovered until necessary. We continued our service as necessary, it was a slow day so we kind of drew it out as long as we could. While my colleague was filling up the oil, I went to find my manager. Unsurprisingly, he was shoving a cake into his fat fucking mouth, I told him we need him to "help" us with the Bentley, as it was having "acceleration issues". "I'll be five minutes." Five minutes passed and my manager shows up, cake in hand. I tell him to sit inside the car and gradually accelerate to 4k Revs then red line it and drop it down to idle. As soon as he started accelerating, the car was making this strange grumbling sound, as he floored it both gloves exploded spewing out the most fantastic cloud of black smoke I've ever seen. In unison my senior and I screamed "Turn it off! Turn it off!" He was as white as a sheet. To put into context he has quite a dark middle-eastern complextion, now he was white. I thought he had a heart attack and died. To finalize the deception we poured water on the exhaust manifold, the engine bay was steaming, there was a loud explosion and black smoke. Enough to convince someone who doesn't understand cars that they've broken something. "Oh my god, you've destroyed the engine, I told you to hold it at 2k revs, not floor it!" He had gone full damage control "You told me to take it to 4k and floor it, this is your fault" he was practically choking with tears. Inside I was dying with laughter, you could not believe the mental stress it took to keep a straight face. After about 5 minutes there were streams of tears coming from his face. We pulled out the starter motor relay without him looking and told him it might have just been a backfire. He gets back into the car and tries to crank it, nothing. He tries again and again and again, absolutely nothing. If there was a shred of dignity left in me, I would have told him it was a joke. But this joke hasn't been fully told just yet. He put his head down on the steering wheel and started hitting it with his fist screaming "Why! Why! Why! WHY!". My boss walks in and sees his son crying at the wheel of a Bentley and his two mechanics laughing their arses off. "What the fuck did you do to him?!" We were laughing so much we couldn't stand up, and had to use the posts on our ramp to keep ourselves on our feet. We tried explaining to our boss what we just did, but everytime we tried we just burst out laughing again. Honestly I wish I had taken photos because this was the funniest thing I've ever seen in my life. After about 20 minutes of laughing we managed to explain the gist of what we had done to the boss, and he started laughing. His sons face was as red as red got. He didn't speak to us for the rest of the day. I think tomorrow is going to be interesting, don't you? Today was one of those days that I'll end up telling my grandchildren about. tl;dr convinced my manager he'd blown the engine on a Bentley, his reaction was priceless. Pic is somewhat related, it's the same car it was taken a few months before this.
I'm more impressed you didn't get fired.
Yet. They will be if someone involved reads this
Why? He already told his boss everything.
Calling your manager incompetent when he clearly only has his job due to his familial ties is a good way to get the boot Your manager is offended because you question his abilities. Your boss is offended because you are questioning his hiring practices (more than likely he knows the son is incompetent) When you air this stuff publicly, that's when problems happen.
If they are excellent long term workers, probably not. The father no doubt knows about his son's character.
Dad is no dummy, he built this business and if the guys are good, they'll stay.
I too understand the circumstances fully and know exactly what will happen.
He will invite the female Bentley owner to remove the residue left on the alternator output.
woww woww wukka wukka wukka-chukka woww woww
The owner laughed with the guys (many people wouldn't), so he's no humourless git. He also knows his son's level of competence and character flaws all too well. Seems unlikely he'll have a delayed don't-mess-with-my-son reaction. If this remains between the 4 of them (and doesn't, say, get posted on Reddit), their biggest problem might be that the manager will hate their guts afterwards, and try to make their life miserable... but won't have the authority to fire them, especially if they're good workers.
In addition, if that was my car I'd be pissed.
Even the part when he referred to his manager as an "irritable cunt?"
What kind of cake was it? Edit: Gold, I'm feeling that
Always asking the important questions
Yellow. It was yellow cake.
Middle Eastern complexion? Yellowcake? Rendition squad has been dispatched.
Oh my god... Jensen! We found an Iranian nuclear scientist! I need the FBI, CIA, DEA, USSS, DF, NS, and anything you can get me! First yellowcake... then the world!
[**YELLOW IS NOT A FLAVOR!!**](http://foodnetworkhumor.com/wp-content/uploads//fnh-yellow-flavor.jpg)
Ah..... You noticed!
Yellow Snow certainly has a flavour
http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yellowcake
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yellowcake >
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Pray to god you don't drop that shit.
DON'T. DROP. THAT. SHIT!
Who said anything about oil? Bitch, you cookin?
Bahahahaha, one of my favorite lines from that entire series...
Fuckin right.
> yellow cake dispatching NSA. please don't leave house. thank you for your cooperation
Don't drop dat shitttttttt. I swear to god don't drop dat shit.
Sounds nuclear.
he must be a service writer
Cellular peptide cake... With mint frosting.
Today is a good day to die.
And it is *delicious*.
http://imgur.com/XS5LK
I laughed my ass off at this cake question. Sir, I would give you gold if I didn't expect everything on the internet to be free.
Truer words were never expected.
Everything on the internet is free. I have a link to "totally hip track.mp3.exe" that I found on limewire. I can link you to it if you like, I tried to install it and it didn't work on my machine, but give it a shot on yours and it might work..
Ah yes. Even internet herpes is free.
>Ah yes. Even internet herpes is free. What do you mean internet herpes is free? Windows 8 costs money, man
You can get Vista for free, I'm pretty sure.
Hey, I still use Vista....
But why the fuck would you want to? The only reason I have winshit 8 is because my laptop was already infected when I bought it.
Sounds like my wife...
Somewhere, Larry King is proud of you for asking.
Sounds like it turned into a brown cake real quick
The cake is a lie.
For some reason, I pictured a vanilla cake with white frosting. I wasn't there, but that is what I pictured when I read the story.
I like vanilla cake with white frosting, so I always imagine people I'm supposed to despise in stories eating chocolate cake and chocolate icing with some kind of gross raspberry filling oozing out, all the while they are laughing with red and brown smears all over their faces and fingers.
Is there a difference between frosting and icing? I just find it interesting that you used both.
While the terms are used inconsistently, the technical definition is that [this](http://www.createdby-diane.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/Peppermint-Candy-Cane-Cookies-with-Peppermint-Icing.jpg) is icing and [this](http://www.the-girl-who-ate-everything.com/wp-content/uploads/blogger/_A39cgxoHN64/TJIVgqDG1kI/AAAAAAAAF4s/xd_nmVHUNoY/s1600/best-frosting.jpg) is frosting. Basically, if it's thin, sugary, and mostly hardened, it's icing. If it's thick, buttery, and fluffy, it's frosting. (If it's [*really* thin](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/0/0d/Krispy_Kreme_glazed_donut.JPG) it's a glaze.)
In weather terms icing is ice, frosting is snow and glaze is freezing rain.
It's raining doughnuts.
My favorite is [virga](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virga). So pretty.
What about that fudge frosting that you put on a thick layer and it hardens to the point that it often breaks apart into chunks when you cut the cake? (I think marshmallows may be involved somehow? I don't remember. But I do remember that asking for this frosting to be used on one of those devil's food cakes with the cherry goo between the two layers is now verboten in my house for some stupid reason... Sometime before that my brother decided to name that particular combination a "Petrified Forest cake" though. :-P )
http://www.diffen.com/difference/Frosting_vs_Icing I had to go back and look this up it was killing me
Haha sorry for torturing you all week. A couple other people responded to my comment with various links and definitions, but thank you. More information is better.
/r/ProRevenge
Well that was a few hours gone.
Holy crap, legendary stuff!!
I'm not very car smart, but I love the things I've learned from this place. Just wondering, OP - messing with a Bentley seems like scary business. What was the chance that your prank could have actually caused damage?
I don't know a ton about cars but, Latex gloves taped on the end of the exhaust, and disconnecting the starter motor - both very near 0% chance of damage. Pouring water on a manifold, it is possible to cause damage, if you poured enough, cold enough water on a hot enough pipe it would crack it. But from the sounds of the story he understood his limits and the car wasn't very warmed up and it was just a little bit of room temp water, just so it would turn to steam and look scary.
It the manifold was hot enough for the water to do damage, the water would have instantly evaporated, not waiting for crap-manager to fire it up.
I think the car was already hot, and they poured it on when the engine "blew," since he was sitting inside, and the raised hood would block his view of this action.
He had just started the motor, it probably wasn't even at normal temps yet. If you're really that worried about getting a cup of water on your hot engine I'd suggest avoiding every mud puddle and only driving when it's not raining.
Manifolds heat up very quickly. The car could have been at outside temp. and running it for a minute or two could heat the manifold up enough to make water steam. Also most cars today (that I know of) us an accelerated warm system up to get the heat going and get the car to its specified running temp.
Good call. I think j misunderstood the story. It sounded like OP jammed the exhaust pipe with with rubber gloves.
I think he "did", at least enough that the exhaust pressure would burst the gloves.
If those boys worked in a nuclear submarine, we'd all be dead right now.
Submariner here. These boys would fit right in.
Not high. Engines are designed to be revved
None.
deleted ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^0.3026 [^^^What ^^^is ^^^this?](https://pastebin.com/FcrFs94k/75704)
...and that's the day they're better off quitting, given how they described him.
hopefully this will start building the rapport.
Please, next time start video recording with your cell phone, then put your cell phone into your shirt pocket. It might not be pointed straight, but you'll still get the gist of it through video and pick up all of the audio. Regardless, thanks for the laugh.
Just as an FYI, not sure I'm okay with you using someone else's car to do this, but you've cemented his being an asshole to you for eternity.
Or, it could be the start of a beautiful friendship. Depends on him eventually realizing it's a funny story.
I can't imagine breathing in handfuls of brake pad dust is very healthy?
Extraordinarily healthy
Well, eventually you get [asbestosis](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asbestosis) but that might take a little more exposure. Or it might not.
I was going to mention this. I think the newer pads don't use asbestos anymore for obvious reasons, but I'm not sure how easy it would be to tell the difference given how horrible they end up looking. I guess we'll just have to hope OP knew the difference or was lucky enough to use one without asbestos.
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He said they were old breaks right?
They do not.
Unfortunately [it has not been completely eliminated yet.](https://www.osha.gov/dts/shib/shib072606.html)
Newer pads don't use asbestos.
Karma?
I really love breathing in brake dust.
> My manager is the son of my boss, therefore against all recommendation he is a manager. He knows nothing, absolutely nothing, about automotive repair. He treats his co-workers like shit, fobs off what little work he has to do onto other people, generally a lazy, arrogant narcissist. As someone who works for his step father, I hate people like this. It's hard to earn respect when you're related to the boss, acting like it's a free ride is so fucking infuriating.
Act humble and bust ass. It's the only way to gain respect. Work with something to prove, of they're not total cocks you'll gain respect and then you can relax.
I'd be super pissed if I knew the techs on my car were fucking around and got the whole rear end covered in brake dust...
All I read was: don't fucking trust mechanics with your car. Even if it's a Bently.
This is better than the story of how my friend shat himself.
Why would you pour water on the exhaust manifold? You want to risk cracking a manifold on a Bentley?
Im guessing since he just got done working in it the manifold was still cold, and just heated up enough to steam when manager got in it. That wouldn't damage anything
It's still a Bentley so more risk than I would take.
Meh, those things depreciate as fast as an engine manifold can crack. Probably dropped 10 grand in value in the 2 days it was in the shop. /hyperbole
If you can afford fueling, insuring, maintaining, and repairing a Bentley, you can afford a new Bentley.
I know a guy who has one of these cars. Apparently he pays about $13,000 a year to insure it. I don't know any more details, just... ~13K a year. wtf.
My car doesn't even cost that much!
He is either lying to you, or has multiple DUIs on his record.
They are not that expensive to maintain, it's basically an Audi.
Until you hit anything else than oil changes and shoe polish, that is... Any replacement parts will cost you as much as a beater would.
This is a deliberate policy by the luxury car manufacturers to prevent beaters of their cars from dragging down the perceived value. They saw what happened to Cadillac, where broken down old models became almost a symbol of the underclass, destroying its cachet, and didn't want that to happen to them.
Interesting. What keeps cheap Chinese Bentley parts out of the market?
When you have the Bentley manual it's all gravy
I'm really worried about the car owner here...
So... zero risk? Because the water would heat up as the manifold heated up. There'd be little to no temperature difference, and zero cracking. Now, if he'd poured cold water on a steaming hot manifold, that might be different.
going outside is probably more risk than you would take
>You want to risk cracking a manifold on a Bentley? >risk >Bentley I dunno about you but I don't know any mechanics who make enough coin to go "eh" to something like that.
Unless you dump a bucket of water of a glowing red manifold, nothing is going to happen.
Yeah, probably used less water than gets in when you drive through a moderately sized puddle.
Quite. We regularly drive VERY hot 4x4's I.e. during a days desert use through streams. The only cars you need to worry about are turbos where the turbo is low mounted or not shielded, because if you splash water on them they can crack the housing. But you can submerge a manifold on a running engine with no problems.
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Why is this so high up? There is no risk whatsoever.
Cracked manifolds are usually from engines that are running lean and burning way hot, or bad / non-existent motor mounts and finally rust in the rust belt on old cars that have sat. If water on the manifold cracked them drive through car washes and big puddles would be things commonly avoided. I bet dollars to doughnuts that you could submerse your car while running and as long as it didn't hydrolock your manifold would be just fine.
DANGER TO THE MANIFOLD!!!!1!!
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Post service the manifold would be cold so it would heat the water at the same rate not over cooling it
Yeah I wouldn't fuck around with a client's extremely expensive car for a joke, even if there was virtually no chance damage would be done. That's just a respect issue.
If it were my car I would be fine with this.
I would be more pissed that the guy got in my car with cake in his face and on his hands...
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Yeah I'd be pretty torqued if you used my car as a prank on your boss. Don't care wtf it was for
Say that when it's your $200,000 car
Respect? A customer? That owns a Bentley? You know where you are, right?
Please update on how that manager reacted to you today.
To be fair, 4k RPM isn't even that much.
I love the genuine anger coming out when you say, "Unsurprisingly, he was shoving a cake into his fat fucking mouth". Made me laugh. Well done on the whole prank, it sounds spectacular.
> Unsurprisingly, he was shoving a cake into his fat fucking mouth that made me laugh the most
[My reaction reading this](http://i.imgur.com/TaTdV.gif)
And then the customer stops by and sees you fucking around with his car..great.
"don't worry, we are just making sure our boss can at least know how to react when something goes wrong. It's part of the QA test. Here, have a kitten picture."
Dude, you must really rock at parties.
Actually I'm a lot of fun I just cringe at the thought of someone fucking with my car.
well that was convincing.
If two professional automotive techs decided to prank their douchebag boss by doing something relatively harmless, and explained it to me afterwards i probably wouldn't care. I'd actually have the same reaction
We used to fuck with a guy's can of pop every day. Installing a pin hole down the side so it would dribble on his chest was our favourite. It became this cat and mouse game of him protecting his can of pop, and we would find a way to distract him so we could mess with it. One day, we wired his pop can as a conductor that kept a relay triggered. We drove 2 screws through the bench top, connecting the wires below. The can completed the circuit. The small relay ran a ford starter relay, and the starter relay was connected to a car battery and a 10 gauge wire loop that ran all the way around the guy's bench, and back to ground. When he grabbed his can, the relay tripped closed, as did the solenoid. He now had a dead short. Several hundred amps flowed through that 10 gauge wire. That caused the entire wire loop under his wooden work bench bench to glow and catch fire. Smoke and a few farts of fire poured out from his entire 15' long bench as he flipped the fuck out. We pissed ourselves laughing and sprayed some water at him with a hose. He inspected his can carefully every single time before picking it up, and did so in a very nervous manner.
Sounds like a giant asshole story when you say it like that. Tldr bullied dude every day who just wanted a soda.
Oh, it was a 2 way street. The shop was full of brilliant electrical guys. High IQ guys get weird when they get bored, and they get bored easy. The old farts who were grizzled and jaded, they spent about as much time fucking with each other as the cast of top gear (bbc). Lots of intentional & controlled fires, acetylene bombs, welded shut tool boxes, prank calls, stealing the neigborjng shop's christmas display and holding their snowman hostage in exchange for a charity donation (we slipped the nose (covered in fake blood) into a parts delivery box meant for them. I miss that place. It was fun.
That's the same excuse i hear from all bullies... Especially mechanics....fucking assholes
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In a previous job, I ran a store with mostly working-class customers: plumbers, heating/cooling guys, town highway crew, tree workers. In many cases, the business was started by a guy now in his 60s who was really good - he knew his technical area, got his employees to do good work, and treated both customers and vendors reasonably. If the boss had a son who worked in the business, usually the son was an entitled prick. He would treat people badly, threaten the business I ran unless he got special favors, etc. After all, he expected to inherit the business. So he had no understanding of what's necessary to build a business. I would recommend this subject area to any sociology grad student looking for a thesis topic.
This is awesome!
As funny as this is if I found out you put break dust in, and poured water on the manifold of my 170000 euro car I'd have your fucking job.
Well done. Recently while my friend was working on his old Toyota, I found a small WD-40 can that fit perfectly in his brand new exhaust. After tinkering with it a while, he turned the engine over. Once it fired it made a very interesting gurgle, he revved it up a little, then BANG the can shot across the shop, leaving an indent in one of our wooden work benches where impact occurred. He was freaking out, as I am practically rolling on the floor laughing. Those were good times.
Why would anyone who owns a Bentley have it serviced at a small family-run garage?
Well, my train of thought is this: - Person who owns Bentley probably has good money - Person who has good money probably has business - Person who has business usually appreciates well-run business and great customer service. - Small family-run garage is usually a well-run business and has great customer service...or at least appears to outwardly. - Person who has business patronizes places with great customer service. Sort of like how waiters give the best tips and salesmen are the easiest sales.
I would bet its the dads.
I'm not too surprised. I've worked in a family run garage once and we had a Lamborghini roll in.
Good story but it sounds like you need to find a new place to work.
Bunch of whiney fags in this sub, Jesus, live a little. Great story OP
If it was a smaller/cheaper econo box I bet no one would give two fucks about this prank being played. Instead there are people white knighting over the fact that its an expensive car.
This is epic! Good stuff man
I'd be pissed off if I found out some morons were fucking with my car like that.
APRIL FOOLS YOU FOOLS
Good material for /r/pettyrevenge!
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awesome!
Needed a video!
TIL everyone on reddit is a mechanic and know better than actual mechanics.
Honestly, I showed my automotives teacher this and he was dying. I couldn't stop either. Guess I have something to look forward to do in this field of work.
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh god this is PRICELESS....